1
00:00:01,935 --> 00:00:03,068
AAH!
2
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:05,070
NO! NO! DON'T!
3
00:00:05,072 --> 00:00:07,572
AAH!
4
00:00:09,542 --> 00:00:11,876
AAH!
5
00:00:11,878 --> 00:00:13,478
NO! DON'T! NO!
6
00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:14,980
GET OVER
HERE!
7
00:00:14,982 --> 00:00:17,682
AAH!
8
00:00:44,110 --> 00:00:46,378
HELLO?
9
00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:54,352
ROSEANNE?
10
00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,090
DAN?
11
00:01:05,031 --> 00:01:07,131
IT'S KATHY.
12
00:01:07,133 --> 00:01:09,067
[CLATTERING]
13
00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:19,844
IS--IS EVERYTHING O.K.?
14
00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:33,725
HELLO?
15
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:47,372
IS ANYBODY HO--?
16
00:01:49,509 --> 00:01:52,110
AAAHHH!
17
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,111
OH!
18
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,812
AAH!
19
00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:57,081
AAH!
20
00:01:57,083 --> 00:01:58,416
WHAT IS IT, KATHY?
21
00:01:58,418 --> 00:02:02,153
I'VE HAD A BAD DAY,
AND NOW I'VE GOT
ALL THIS TO CLEAN UP.
22
00:02:03,490 --> 00:02:04,489
I, UH...
23
00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:07,926
I--I NEED
TO GO HOME, I--
24
00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:10,161
WOULD YOU LOOK
AT THIS MESS?
25
00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:13,464
I DON'T KNOW
HOW MANY TIMES
I'VE SAID IT--
26
00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:15,734
IT'S JUST LIKE
GUTTING A FISH.
27
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:19,638
I SWEAR,
I WAS WAY BETTER
THE LAST TIME.
28
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:21,039
THE LAST TIME?
29
00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:22,373
YOU KNOW...
30
00:02:22,375 --> 00:02:24,676
WITH BECKY'S DAD.
HE WAS BLOND, TOO.
31
00:02:24,678 --> 00:02:28,946
HEY, YOU'VE GOT
A GARBAGE DISPOSAL
OVER YOUR HOUSE, RIGHT?
32
00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:30,281
OH, MY GOD.
33
00:02:30,283 --> 00:02:31,148
PLEASE, PLEASE...
34
00:02:31,150 --> 00:02:33,918
I--I NEED
TO GO HOME.
35
00:02:33,920 --> 00:02:36,721
OH, NO.
YOU CAN'T GO.
YOU'LL TELL.
36
00:02:36,723 --> 00:02:38,856
NO, I WON'T.
I PROMISE.
37
00:02:38,858 --> 00:02:40,024
I WON'T TELL.
PLEASE.
38
00:02:40,026 --> 00:02:41,392
LET ME GO.
39
00:02:41,394 --> 00:02:42,393
OH!
40
00:02:42,395 --> 00:02:43,327
LIVER?
41
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:44,395
AAH!
42
00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:45,396
AAH!
43
00:02:45,398 --> 00:02:46,798
OH!
44
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:47,732
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
45
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:49,600
GOT YOU!
46
00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:56,574
THAT WAS A HORRIBLE...
47
00:02:56,576 --> 00:02:58,409
HORRIBLE...
48
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,514
HORRIBLE THING TO DO.
49
00:03:03,516 --> 00:03:05,517
YOU KNOW, HON,
EVERY TIME
WE DO THIS,
50
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:08,019
PEOPLE GET
SO TICKED OFF.
51
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:10,889
YEAH.
WHEN WILL WE LEARN?
52
00:03:10,891 --> 00:04:27,932
HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH.
53
00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:32,603
WE GOT KATHY GOOD.
SHE ALMOST LOST IT.
54
00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:35,573
YEAH. DAMN GOOD
BLADDER CONTROL, THOUGH.
55
00:04:35,575 --> 00:04:39,511
WELL, THANK YOU.
I DID LAUGH PRETTY HARD.
56
00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:43,514
LISTEN,
I'M GOING OUT TONIGHT.
57
00:04:43,516 --> 00:04:45,883
WILL YOU BE HOME
FOR DINNER?
58
00:04:45,885 --> 00:04:47,085
I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT ARE WE HAVING?
59
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:48,152
LIVER.
LIVER.
60
00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,487
HEH HEH.
61
00:04:49,489 --> 00:04:52,924
GOD, I WISH I HAD
AN ADULT ROLE MODEL.
62
00:04:52,926 --> 00:04:54,125
WHERE YOU GOING TONIGHT?
63
00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:56,861
YOU GOT SOME SORT A PARTY?
WHAT ARE YOU GOING AS?
64
00:04:56,863 --> 00:04:58,196
I'M GOING AS BECKY.
65
00:04:58,198 --> 00:05:01,766
THAT OUGHT TO SCARE
THE CRAP OUT OF THEM.
66
00:05:01,768 --> 00:05:04,502
FUNNY.
IT'S NOT A PARTY.
IT'S A MOVIE.
67
00:05:04,504 --> 00:05:05,670
SCARY MOVIE?
68
00:05:05,672 --> 00:05:08,373
MOTHER,
I'VE OUTGROWN IT.
MOVE ON.
69
00:05:08,375 --> 00:05:09,307
AH.
70
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:10,675
HOW'S ABOUT YOU,
DARLENE.
71
00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:14,579
ARE YOU DRESSING UP
ALL GROSS FOR MOMMY TONIGHT?
72
00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:17,882
NO. I THINK
I'M JUST GOING
TO STAY HOME.
73
00:05:17,884 --> 00:05:19,117
WHAT'S WRONG, DARLENE?
74
00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:21,252
YOU USED TO CARE
ABOUT HALLOWEEN.
75
00:05:21,254 --> 00:05:25,022
YEAH. I ALSO USED
TO WANT TO MARRY
SCOTT BAIO.
76
00:05:29,629 --> 00:05:31,562
OH, YOU LOOK GREAT!
77
00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:34,064
WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO BE?
78
00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:40,738
I TOLD YOU.
YOU'RE ALFALFA
OF THE LITTLE RASCALS.
79
00:05:40,740 --> 00:05:42,439
I WANT
TO BE THE TERMINATOR.
80
00:05:42,441 --> 00:05:43,541
NO.
81
00:05:43,543 --> 00:05:44,942
EVERYBODY'S
THE TERMINATOR.
82
00:05:44,944 --> 00:05:46,978
YOU LOOK CUTE.
83
00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:49,247
I DON'T WANT
TO LOOK CUTE.
84
00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:50,548
HONEY, LET ME.
85
00:05:50,550 --> 00:05:54,986
D.J., ALFALFAS
KILL TERMINATORS.
86
00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:57,589
YEAH, RIGHT.
87
00:05:57,591 --> 00:05:59,023
NO, NO.
REALLY, REALLY.
88
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,959
SEE,
THIS IS YOUR ANTENNA,
89
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:02,961
AND IT DETECTS
TERMINATOR WAVES.
90
00:06:02,963 --> 00:06:05,964
MOM, WHY NOT
GIVE HIM A SIGN
91
00:06:05,966 --> 00:06:08,967
SAYING,
"KNOCK ME DOWN
AND STEAL MY CANDY."
92
00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:14,038
I WANT TO DO
WHAT MY FRIENDS
ARE DOING.
93
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,540
WELL, FINE.
94
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:19,511
DO WHAT YOU WANT
AND LEAVE ME OUT OF IT.
95
00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,946
I DON'T
GET IT ANYMORE, DAN.
96
00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:24,949
YEAH. I REMEMBER
WHEN HALLOWEEN
MEANT SOMETHING.
97
00:06:24,951 --> 00:06:29,020
REMEMBER THROWING
FLAMING BAGS OF DOG-DOO
98
00:06:29,022 --> 00:06:31,456
ON THE HENDERSON'S LAWN
AS A FAMILY?
99
00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:32,457
AHH.
100
00:06:32,459 --> 00:06:33,458
HEY!
101
00:06:33,460 --> 00:06:34,692
OH, GOOD.
102
00:06:34,694 --> 00:06:37,995
JACKIE CAN HELP ME
YANK THE SLIME
OUT OF THIS THING.
103
00:06:37,997 --> 00:06:41,098
I GOT TO GET
SOME MORE TUBING
FOR OUR COSTUME.
104
00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:42,300
YOUR COSTUME'S
GOT TUBING?
105
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:43,768
MAYBE. MAYBE NOT.
106
00:06:43,770 --> 00:06:46,704
WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME
WHAT YOU'RE GOING AS?
107
00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:48,973
BECAUSE IT'S SUPPOSED
TO BE A SURPRISE.
108
00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:51,876
I TOLD YOU
WHAT I WAS GOING AS?
109
00:06:51,878 --> 00:06:53,978
YEAH. MORTICIA ADDAMS.
NOT TOO BORING.
110
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:56,180
SORRY IT'S NOT
UP TO YOUR STANDARDS.
111
00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:58,249
GIVE ME HALF AN HOUR.
112
00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:01,218
I'LL TURN YOU
INTO A SCIENCE EXPERIMENT
GONE BERSERK.
113
00:07:01,220 --> 00:07:04,856
NO, THANKS.
WHAT'S
WITH THE BLOOD?
114
00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:07,058
OH. I KILLED DAN.
115
00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,259
OF COURSE.
116
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:11,429
SO, ARE YOU STILL GOING
ALONE TONIGHT?
117
00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:12,430
YEAH.
118
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:13,431
NO DATE.
119
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,800
ARE YOU BUMMED?
120
00:07:15,802 --> 00:07:18,369
WELL, NO.
NOT NOW.
121
00:07:18,371 --> 00:07:19,170
SOON?
122
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:20,671
NO. I MEAN,
123
00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:22,673
I WAS BUMMED ABOUT IT,
124
00:07:22,675 --> 00:07:25,610
AROUND THE TIME
OF THE ARNIE DISASTER.
125
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:28,179
I WAS SO DESPERATE
FOR COMPANY,
126
00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:31,282
I ACTUALLY CALLED UP
SOME OLD BOYFRIENDS.
127
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:32,683
UGH,
THAT'S PATHETIC.
128
00:07:32,685 --> 00:07:33,684
THANKS.
129
00:07:33,686 --> 00:07:35,019
WHO DID YOU CALL?
130
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:36,254
I DON'T WANT TO GET--
131
00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:37,755
NO. WHO, WHO?
132
00:07:37,757 --> 00:07:38,756
GARY.
133
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:39,757
OH, GOD!
134
00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:40,958
AND I HUNG UP.
135
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:41,959
AND?
136
00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:43,027
TIM BREWER.
137
00:07:43,029 --> 00:07:44,262
WHO,
THAT MAMA'S BOY?
138
00:07:44,264 --> 00:07:45,263
SHE ANSWERED...
139
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:47,865
ALTHOUGH, IT COULD
HAVE BEEN HIM.
140
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:50,768
MAN, I'M GLAD THAT ONE
NEVER WORKED OUT.
141
00:07:50,770 --> 00:07:52,770
YEAH,
AND I CALLED BOOKER.
142
00:07:52,772 --> 00:07:54,772
WHAT
DID HE HAVE TO SAY?
143
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:57,775
NOTHING.
I LEFT A MESSAGE
ON HIS MACHINE.
144
00:07:57,777 --> 00:07:59,577
I DON'T WANT
TO GET INTO IT.
145
00:07:59,579 --> 00:08:03,214
I DON'T NEED A DATE
TO HAVE A GOOD TIME.
146
00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:08,052
SO YOU'LL GET DRUNK
AND HANG AROUND ME ALL NIGHT.
147
00:08:08,054 --> 00:08:09,487
DO YOU MIND?
148
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,722
MOM!
149
00:08:15,962 --> 00:08:18,162
WHERE ARE
MY HAND GRENADES?
150
00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:19,430
IN YOUR BOTTOM DRAWER.
151
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:20,865
WHERE ELSE?
152
00:08:20,867 --> 00:08:22,700
OH, YEAH.
RIGHT.
153
00:08:25,939 --> 00:08:27,939
WHO'S HE SUPPOSED TO BE?
154
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,374
I DON'T KNOW.
155
00:08:29,376 --> 00:08:32,243
THE ALFALFANATOR.
156
00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:33,311
UH-HUH.
157
00:09:01,841 --> 00:09:02,906
WELL...
158
00:09:02,908 --> 00:09:05,776
I SEE TWO WOMEN WHO
SHOULD HAVE CONSULTED
159
00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:07,412
BEFORE CHOOSING
THEIR COSTUMES.
160
00:09:07,414 --> 00:09:09,613
YOU KNEW I WAS BORROWING
ROSEANNE'S WIG.
161
00:09:09,615 --> 00:09:11,649
HOW COULD
YOU DO THIS?
162
00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:13,851
HOW DID I KNOW
IT WAS FOR HALLOWEEN?
163
00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:15,687
WHAT DID YOU THINK?
164
00:09:15,689 --> 00:09:16,787
I CERTAINLY DON'T KNOW.
165
00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:21,292
PERHAPS TO TRY
AND COVER YOUR
HAIR COLOR DU JOUR.
166
00:09:21,294 --> 00:09:22,226
HEY. HEY.
167
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:25,062
LET'S NOT GET SNIPPY.
168
00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:28,232
SORRY.
I PUT A LOT OF THOUGHT
INTO THIS COSTUME--
169
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,667
WELL, SO DID I.
170
00:09:29,669 --> 00:09:33,571
WHAT ARE THE ODDS
WE'D BOTH COME
AS MORTICIA?
171
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,740
YOU'RE MORTICIA?
THEN, THAT'S NO PROBLEM.
172
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:38,076
I'M ELVIRA.
173
00:09:39,613 --> 00:09:42,914
WE STILL LOOK LIKE
THE JUDDS FROM HELL.
174
00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:45,583
HI, ANNE MARIE.
175
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:49,887
I HATE TO RUIN THE PARTY,
BUT ELVIS' GHOST IS HERE.
176
00:09:49,889 --> 00:09:52,489
ARNIE!
DID HE SEE ME?
177
00:09:52,491 --> 00:09:56,427
I DON'T THINK SO,
BUT DON'T HANG NEAR
THE FREE FOOD TOO LONG.
178
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:57,428
O.K. RIGHT.
179
00:09:57,430 --> 00:10:02,033
I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU BOTH CAME AS CHER.
180
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:05,937
JACKIE!
181
00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:06,938
JACKIE!
182
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:07,939
SO CLOSE.
183
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:10,474
I GOT
A SITUATION HERE.
184
00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:11,709
NANCY'S WITH ME TONIGHT.
185
00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:14,212
THE AX MURDERER
IN THE CORNER.
186
00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:15,379
CUTE.
187
00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:17,081
YOU CAN'T
BE COMING ON TO ME.
UNDERSTAND?
188
00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:19,217
I THINK I CAN CONTROL
MYSELF, ARNIE.
189
00:10:19,219 --> 00:10:20,618
I REALLY APPRECIATE IT.
190
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,854
WHOA! SHE'S SEEN US.
ACT LIKE YOU NEVER
SLEPT WITH ME.
191
00:10:23,856 --> 00:10:25,856
HI, HONEY!
I LOVE YOU!
192
00:10:25,858 --> 00:10:28,226
UGH!
193
00:10:30,496 --> 00:10:33,197
O.K., EVERYBODY,
QUIET, PLEASE.
194
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:34,932
PLEASE, EVERYBODY, QUIET.
195
00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:35,999
WILL EVERYBODY
GET A SEAT, PLEASE?
196
00:10:36,001 --> 00:10:38,636
EVERYBODY TAKE A SEAT.
197
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,003
EVERYBODY.
198
00:10:40,005 --> 00:10:41,505
O.K. THANK YOU.
199
00:10:41,507 --> 00:10:43,574
WELL,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
200
00:10:43,576 --> 00:10:45,008
IT WOULDN'T BE HALLOWEEN
201
00:10:45,010 --> 00:10:47,010
UNLESS THE CONNERS
OVERDID IT,
202
00:10:47,012 --> 00:10:48,512
SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO--
203
00:10:48,514 --> 00:10:51,515
HEY, CHUCKIE!
JUST DO IT
LIKE WE TOLD YOU.
204
00:10:51,517 --> 00:10:53,951
OH. O.K.
205
00:10:53,953 --> 00:10:55,786
AHEM...
206
00:10:55,788 --> 00:10:56,987
"FELLOW LODGE MEMBERS,
207
00:10:56,989 --> 00:10:59,990
"WE HAD BOOKED
A FABULOUS ACT TONIGHT,
208
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:03,461
"BUT UNFORTUNATELY
THEY DIED.
209
00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:05,830
"BUT THE SHOW MUST GO ON,
210
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:08,765
"SO HERE THEY ARE,
FRESH FROM THE CEMETERY--
211
00:11:08,767 --> 00:11:10,334
PLEASE WELCOME..."
OH, MAN.
212
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:14,571
"DEAD-GAR BERGEN
AND MORTUARY SNERD."
213
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:26,784
HEY, EVERYBODY.
IT'S GREAT TO BE HERE.
214
00:11:26,786 --> 00:11:30,087
SO THIS IS HELL.
IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT.
215
00:11:30,089 --> 00:11:32,322
MORTY,
I TOLD YOU,
WE'RE IN LANFORD.
216
00:11:32,324 --> 00:11:33,390
LANFORD?
217
00:11:33,392 --> 00:11:34,658
SAY,
ISN'T THAT ARNIE?
218
00:11:34,660 --> 00:11:37,027
I TOLD YOU
TO GO TO HELL.
219
00:11:37,029 --> 00:11:40,064
NOW, MORTY.
THESE ARE OUR FRIENDS.
220
00:11:40,066 --> 00:11:42,200
ISN'T THAT JACKIE
OVER THERE?
221
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:45,402
I HEAR SHE'S
A TRUCK DRIVER NOW.
222
00:11:45,404 --> 00:11:46,370
THAT'S A SWITCH.
223
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:49,874
JACKIE IN THE FRONT SEAT
WITH HER FEET ON THE FLOOR.
224
00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:50,708
HEY!
225
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:53,110
HEY!
226
00:11:53,112 --> 00:11:55,980
NOW, MORTY.
BE NICE TO THE PEOPLE.
227
00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:57,982
TELL THEM HOW WE DIED.
228
00:11:57,984 --> 00:12:00,985
SIMPLE. I LET YOU
WRITE THE JOKES.
229
00:12:00,987 --> 00:12:03,421
YEAH. LIKE YOUR SHTICK
DON'T STINK.
230
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:04,288
ANYWAY...
231
00:12:04,290 --> 00:12:06,290
MY TERMITE-RIDDLED
LITTLE FRIEND,
232
00:12:06,292 --> 00:12:09,493
ARE YOU READY TO DO
OUR LITTLE SONG?
233
00:12:09,495 --> 00:12:11,429
GOD,
DON'T LET HER SING!
234
00:12:11,431 --> 00:12:12,763
SHUT UP, ARNIE!
235
00:12:12,765 --> 00:12:14,065
HIT IT, DEAD-GAR.
236
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,266
♪ DADA DADA DUM DUM... ♪
237
00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:17,501
♪ WELL, I COME
FROM 6 FEET UNDER ♪
238
00:12:17,503 --> 00:12:19,503
♪ WITH A DEAD GUY
ON MY KNEE ♪
239
00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:21,238
♪ I'M HEADIN' DOWN
TO HADES ♪
240
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:23,407
♪ FOR TO SPEND
ETERNITY ♪
241
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:25,542
♪ HEY THERE, DEAD-GAR ♪
242
00:12:25,544 --> 00:12:27,144
♪ I THINK
IT'S PLAIN TO SEE ♪
243
00:12:27,146 --> 00:12:29,013
♪ WE BOUGHT
A CARDBOARD CASKET ♪
244
00:12:29,015 --> 00:12:35,086
♪ AND THE WORMS
HAVE EATEN ME ♪♪
245
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:50,501
WELL, YOU WON
THE GRAND PRIZE AGAIN!
246
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:52,202
WAS THERE EVER
ANY DOUBT?
247
00:12:52,204 --> 00:12:53,503
50 BUCKS. WOW!
248
00:12:53,505 --> 00:12:56,741
WHAT DID
THE COSTUME COST? 100?
249
00:12:56,743 --> 00:12:58,909
WE DON'T DO IT
FOR THE MONEY.
250
00:12:58,911 --> 00:13:01,445
WE DO IT
FOR THE ENVY.
251
00:13:01,447 --> 00:13:05,750
WELL, YOU WERE
A CONVINCING DUMMY.
252
00:13:05,752 --> 00:13:07,285
JEALOUS,
JEALOUS,
JEALOUS!
253
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:09,587
HONEY, HONEY.
LOOK WHO'S HERE.
254
00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:11,622
OH, MY GOD!
IT'S THE BOWMANS!
255
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,358
I WONDER HOW HE MANAGED
TO DRAG HER DOWN TO...
256
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:15,426
THE LODGE.
257
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:16,494
WAIT A MINUTE, DAN.
258
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:18,496
I KNOW
WHY SHE'S HERE.
259
00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:21,365
SHE'S HERE TO GET US BACK
FOR WHAT WE DID TODAY.
260
00:13:21,367 --> 00:13:22,433
NO WAY!
261
00:13:22,435 --> 00:13:24,801
I'M SERIOUS, DAN,
SHE HATES THE LODGE.
262
00:13:24,803 --> 00:13:27,738
THE ONLY REASON
SHE'D SHOW UP ON OUR TURF
263
00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:31,108
IS TO TRY AND HUMILIATE US
IN FRONT OF OUR FRIENDS.
264
00:13:31,110 --> 00:13:33,210
TOO BAD
SHE DIDN'T SEE THE ACT.
265
00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:44,121
COULD HAVE SAVED HER
A TRIP.
266
00:13:45,991 --> 00:13:48,125
GREAT ACT, DAN.
267
00:13:48,127 --> 00:13:49,860
YEAH, WHAT WAS
YOUR FAVORITE PART?
268
00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:51,495
I LIKED THE JOKES.
269
00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:53,164
OH, REALLY?
270
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,998
THE SONG?
271
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,967
HOW ABOUT THE WATERBED?
272
00:13:56,969 --> 00:13:58,735
SEE, 'CAUSE
THAT WAS MY IDEA.
273
00:13:58,737 --> 00:13:59,803
ROSEANNE WAS AGAINST IT,
274
00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:02,639
BUT WE NEEDED
A BIG CLOSER.
275
00:14:02,641 --> 00:14:03,608
YEAH. YOU'RE RIGHT.
276
00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:06,143
YOU DEFINITELY
NEEDED A BIG CLOSER.
277
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:10,047
HONEY,
THEY LOVED
THE WATERBED.
278
00:14:10,049 --> 00:14:11,415
STAY ALERT, DAN.
279
00:14:11,417 --> 00:14:13,017
KATHY'S OVER THERE
PLOTTING REVENGE.
280
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:15,485
WE KNOW, SO WE'VE
GOT THE EDGE.
281
00:14:15,487 --> 00:14:16,887
HONEY, YOU'RE
JUST BEING PARANOID.
282
00:14:16,889 --> 00:14:19,190
RELAX
AND HAVE A GOOD TIME.
283
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:20,757
I AM NOT
BEING PARANOID.
284
00:14:20,759 --> 00:14:23,060
THEY'VE GOT
CRYSTAL IN ON IT.
285
00:14:23,062 --> 00:14:25,963
SHE'S TALKING
TO CRYSTAL,
BIG DEAL.
286
00:14:25,965 --> 00:14:27,064
SHE'S JUST
BEING SOCIABLE.
287
00:14:27,066 --> 00:14:28,232
OH, RIGHT.
288
00:14:28,234 --> 00:14:30,134
WHEN HAS KATHY
EVER BEEN SOCIABLE?
289
00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:32,203
O.K., WE PULLED ONE
ON HER.
290
00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:34,705
SHE PULLS ONE
ON US, WE'RE EVEN.
291
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,573
I DON'T WANT TO BE EVEN.
292
00:14:36,575 --> 00:14:38,575
I WANT TO BE BETTER.
293
00:14:38,577 --> 00:14:40,144
SO, WATCH YOUR BACK.
294
00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:41,212
FINE.
295
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:42,646
I'LL BE AT THE BAR.
296
00:14:42,648 --> 00:14:45,216
IF I'M NOT BACK
IN 15 MINUTES...
297
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:47,051
I'LL BE AT THE BAR.
298
00:14:47,053 --> 00:14:48,052
ROSEANNE.
299
00:14:48,054 --> 00:14:49,387
I MET THIS GUY.
300
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:50,821
HE SEEMS
REALLY GREAT,
301
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:52,789
BUT HE'S IN THIS
MOOSE COSTUME.
302
00:14:52,791 --> 00:14:56,226
NO MATTER WHAT,
HE WON'T TAKE
THE HEAD OFF.
303
00:15:00,299 --> 00:15:01,732
YOU LISTENING TO ME?
304
00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:03,734
YEAH, YEAH.
YOU MET A MOOSE.
305
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,435
CONGRATULATIONS.
306
00:15:05,437 --> 00:15:06,837
WHAT'S WITH YOU?
307
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:09,539
SEE THAT LITTLE
MISS YARN-HEAD
OVER THERE?
308
00:15:09,541 --> 00:15:11,975
WELL, SHE DON'T KNOW
WHO SHE'S MESSING WITH.
309
00:15:11,977 --> 00:15:14,044
I AM THE MASTER.
310
00:15:14,046 --> 00:15:17,080
ALL'S I'VE GOT
TO DO IS THINK.
311
00:15:17,082 --> 00:15:18,582
IF I WERE HER,
312
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:21,585
WHAT WOULD I DO
TO GET EVEN.
313
00:15:24,824 --> 00:15:25,823
HO HO.
314
00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:27,157
THAT BITCH.
315
00:15:35,133 --> 00:15:36,667
I SAID TO MYSELF,
316
00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:39,202
"EVEN IF IT'S CRAZY,
IT'S MY LIFE.
317
00:15:39,204 --> 00:15:41,605
IF I WANT TO BE A TRUCKER,
THAT'S WHAT'S RIGHT FOR ME."
318
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:42,706
THAT'S GREAT.
319
00:15:42,708 --> 00:15:43,707
YOU'RE INDEPENDENT,
GET TO TRAVEL--
320
00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:45,042
IT'S PERFECT FOR YOU.
321
00:15:45,044 --> 00:15:47,511
HOW DO YOU KNOW
IT'S PERFECT FOR ME?
322
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:48,979
I'VE JUST GOT
THIS FEELING.
323
00:15:48,981 --> 00:15:50,981
COME ON.
TAKE OFF THE MASK.
324
00:15:50,983 --> 00:15:54,151
I TOLD YOU
YOU MIGHT BE
DISAPPOINTED.
325
00:15:54,153 --> 00:15:57,922
I DON'T WANT
THAT TO HAPPEN UNTIL
AFTER WE'VE HAD SEX.
326
00:15:57,924 --> 00:15:59,723
YOU'RE PRETTY
SURE OF YOURSELF.
327
00:15:59,725 --> 00:16:03,561
WELL, HUNTING SEASON
STARTS TOMORROW,
SO IT'S NOW OR NEVER.
328
00:16:03,563 --> 00:16:06,163
NO. TAKE OFF
THE MOOSE HEAD.
329
00:16:06,165 --> 00:16:10,200
ALL RIGHT,
BUT YOU'VE REALLY BEEN
DIGGING ME UP UNTIL NOW.
330
00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:13,236
TRICK OR TREAT.
331
00:16:13,238 --> 00:16:14,104
BOOKER?
332
00:16:15,274 --> 00:16:16,807
I GOT YOUR CALL.
333
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:19,109
DAMN IT.
I THOUGHT IT WAS
SOMEBODY GOOD.
334
00:16:19,111 --> 00:16:21,111
JACKIE, COME ON.
335
00:16:21,113 --> 00:16:22,546
HEY, DAN.
336
00:16:22,548 --> 00:16:23,614
HEY, JER.
337
00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:24,849
HEY, WHERE'S ROSIE?
338
00:16:24,851 --> 00:16:25,783
WHERE'S KATHY?
339
00:16:25,785 --> 00:16:27,885
AT THE CAR
GETTING A SWEATER.
340
00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:30,788
THEN ROSIE'S
IN THE BUSHES
WATCHING HER.
341
00:16:30,790 --> 00:16:34,124
SHE THINKS KATHY'S
GOING TO GET EVEN
FOR THE TRICK.
342
00:16:34,126 --> 00:16:38,195
KATHY WAS SO MAD
SHE DIDN'T SPEAK
TO ME ALL DAY.
343
00:16:38,197 --> 00:16:39,697
YOU OWE ME A BEER.
344
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:41,799
I GUESS I DO.
345
00:16:41,801 --> 00:16:42,833
GUS...
346
00:16:44,770 --> 00:16:47,405
WHY CALL IF YOU
DIDN'T WANT
TO SEE ME?
347
00:16:47,407 --> 00:16:50,340
IT WASN'T A HAPPY TIME
THAT NIGHT AT JACKIE'S.
348
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:53,944
I WANTED
TO TALK TO SOMEONE
WHO WASN'T MY SISTER.
349
00:16:53,946 --> 00:16:55,679
SO YOU NEEDED
TO TALK TO SOMEONE,
350
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:57,647
HERE I AM,
LET'S TALK.
351
00:16:57,649 --> 00:16:59,116
I CALLED OTHER GUYS.
352
00:16:59,118 --> 00:17:01,685
I'M THE ONLY ONE
THAT SHOWED UP.
353
00:17:01,687 --> 00:17:03,053
WE DON'T KNOW THAT.
354
00:17:03,055 --> 00:17:05,489
THERE IS SOMEONE
DRESSED AS MADONNA
355
00:17:05,491 --> 00:17:08,926
WHO COULD VERY WELL
BE TIM BREWER.
356
00:17:08,928 --> 00:17:10,661
I MADE A MISTAKE.
FORGET IT.
357
00:17:10,663 --> 00:17:12,129
COME HERE, SIT DOWN.
358
00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:13,363
THERE'S SOMETHING
359
00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:17,301
I'VE BEEN WANTING
TO ASK YOU SINCE
WE BROKE UP.
360
00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:19,603
WHY DID WE BREAK UP?
361
00:17:19,605 --> 00:17:21,806
YOU WERE SEEING
SOMEBODY ELSE.
362
00:17:21,808 --> 00:17:24,107
SO IT WAS MY FAULT.
I WAS AFRAID OF THAT.
363
00:17:25,745 --> 00:17:27,344
HI, KATHY.
364
00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:30,047
YOUR SISTER IS INSANE.
365
00:17:32,518 --> 00:17:34,452
ROSEANNE'S
NEW NEIGHBOR.
366
00:17:34,454 --> 00:17:35,986
HA HA--HEY!
367
00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:36,720
HEY!
368
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,222
BOOKER! ALL RIGHT!
369
00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,491
JACKIE, IT'S BOOKER.
BOOKER WAS THE MOOSE.
370
00:17:41,493 --> 00:17:42,492
I KNOW.
371
00:17:42,494 --> 00:17:44,762
HOW YOU BEEN?
YOU LOOK GREAT.
372
00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:45,929
WELL--
373
00:17:45,931 --> 00:17:48,265
I CAN'T TALK TO YOU NOW.
374
00:17:56,709 --> 00:17:58,342
JERRY,
LET'S GO HOME.
375
00:17:58,344 --> 00:17:59,209
BYE, DAN.
376
00:17:59,211 --> 00:18:00,577
BYE, JER.
377
00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:04,448
LEAVING ALREADY,
OR IS THAT WHAT YOU
WANT ME TO THINK?
378
00:18:04,450 --> 00:18:07,083
ROSEANNE,
WHY ARE YOU
FOLLOWING ME?
379
00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:09,286
WHY WERE YOU
AT YOUR CAR?
380
00:18:09,288 --> 00:18:10,955
GETTING MY SWEATER.
381
00:18:10,957 --> 00:18:13,124
WHY WERE YOU
DOING THAT?
382
00:18:13,126 --> 00:18:15,726
TO GET AWAY FROM YOU.
383
00:18:17,496 --> 00:18:20,631
THEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING
HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?
384
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:23,800
MY HUSBAND
ASKED ME TO COME,
385
00:18:23,802 --> 00:18:25,903
SO I DID.
386
00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:30,641
MARRIED PEOPLE
DO THINGS LIKE THAT
FOR ONE ANOTHER.
387
00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:32,543
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH.
388
00:18:33,712 --> 00:18:36,012
HOW MANY TIMES
DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU
389
00:18:36,014 --> 00:18:38,014
THAT I AM NOT
GOING TO WASTE
390
00:18:38,016 --> 00:18:40,751
ONE IOTA OF ENERGY
GETTING YOU BACK?
391
00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:43,053
I THINK I'M BETTER
THAN THAT.
392
00:18:43,055 --> 00:18:43,987
JERRY, COME.
393
00:18:43,989 --> 00:18:45,054
BYE, DAN.
394
00:18:45,056 --> 00:18:46,055
BYE, JER.
395
00:18:48,026 --> 00:18:50,460
OH, SURE YOU THINK
YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME.
396
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:54,932
BUT WHEN YOU REMEMBER
THE TERRIBLE THING
I DID TO YOU TODAY,
397
00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:57,868
YOU'LL SINK TO MY LEVEL
LIKE A ROCK.
398
00:19:04,409 --> 00:19:07,911
WHY WOULDN'T SHE GET ME
BACK AFTER I GOT HER?
399
00:19:07,913 --> 00:19:09,980
AM I NOT
GOOD ENOUGH TO GET?
400
00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:13,483
IS SHE TRYING TO MAKE
ME FEEL BENEATH REVENGE?
401
00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:16,654
MAYBE RUINING
YOUR FAVORITE NIGHT
WAS HER PAYBACK.
402
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:20,090
NO, DAN. SHE DOESN'T HAVE
THAT KIND OF IMAGINATION.
403
00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:22,026
SHE'LL DO SOMETHING
TO GET ME BACK,
404
00:19:22,028 --> 00:19:24,028
AND IT WILL
BE REALLY LAME,
405
00:19:24,030 --> 00:19:25,395
AND I'LL BE READY.
406
00:19:25,397 --> 00:19:27,531
I'M SURE YOU
WILL BE, DEAR.
407
00:19:27,533 --> 00:19:30,600
I WISH WE WOULD
HAVE REHEARSED
THE ACT MORE.
408
00:19:30,602 --> 00:19:33,504
PEOPLE DIDN'T GET WE
WERE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD.
409
00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:34,838
IF IT'S
ANY CONSOLATION,
410
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,806
I'M SURE
THEY WISH WE WERE.
411
00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:39,209
WHOA!
412
00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:40,844
YEOW! YEOW!
413
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,279
YEOW! YEOW! YEOW!
414
00:19:42,281 --> 00:19:43,580
YEOW!
415
00:19:43,582 --> 00:19:44,548
WHAT'S GOING ON?
416
00:19:44,550 --> 00:19:46,383
SNAKES IN THE BED!
417
00:19:46,385 --> 00:19:48,819
IT'S NEW.
NOW IT'S COVERED
WITH SNAKE SWEAT.
418
00:19:48,821 --> 00:19:51,188
YOU GET THEM OUT.
YOU'RE THE MAN!
419
00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:52,323
ICK!
420
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:55,826
SHE'S GONE TOO FAR
THIS TIME.
421
00:19:55,828 --> 00:19:57,394
SNAKES BITE AND SQUEEZE.
422
00:19:57,396 --> 00:19:59,229
KATHY'S TRYING
TO KILL US.
423
00:19:59,231 --> 00:20:00,764
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
424
00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:02,900
KATHY ISN'T TRYING
TO KILL YOU.
425
00:20:02,902 --> 00:20:04,401
YEAH. WE ARE.
426
00:20:06,405 --> 00:20:09,272
YOU PUT SNAKES
IN OUR BED?
427
00:20:09,274 --> 00:20:11,208
WELL, YOU WERE SAYING
HOW IMPORTANT
428
00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:13,543
THIS HALLOWEEN STUFF
IS TO YOU.
429
00:20:15,013 --> 00:20:17,247
MY BABIES!
430
00:20:20,051 --> 00:20:22,419
YOU'VE MADE YOUR MOTHER
AND ME VERY HAPPY.
431
00:20:22,421 --> 00:20:24,888
NOW GET RID
OF THE SNAKES.
432
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:25,656
I'LL DO IT!
433
00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,324
D.J. DON'T
TOUCH THOSE SNAKES.
434
00:20:27,326 --> 00:20:29,359
I'M NOT
UNTYING THEM AGAIN.
435
00:20:30,496 --> 00:20:32,929
OH, OUR BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN
436
00:20:32,931 --> 00:20:35,598
REMEMBERED US ON A HOLIDAY.
437
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:38,301
GOD, BLESS US
ONE AND ALL.
438
00:20:38,303 --> 00:20:40,470
TO THINK YOU
HAD TO WORRY
ABOUT KATHY.
439
00:20:40,472 --> 00:20:41,538
YEAH...
440
00:20:43,042 --> 00:20:45,875
OF COURSE YOU KNOW
WHAT THIS MEANS, DAN?
441
00:20:45,877 --> 00:20:47,511
SHE'S STILL OUT THERE.
442
00:20:47,513 --> 00:20:51,714
[HOWLING]
443
00:21:03,094 --> 00:21:05,629
NOW ALL SHE HAS TO DO
IS PICK UP THE BOX...
444
00:21:05,631 --> 00:21:07,197
HA HA HA.
445
00:21:09,067 --> 00:21:11,802
IT'LL ALL BE OVER
IN A COUPLE OF SECONDS.
446
00:21:11,804 --> 00:21:14,304
I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU'RE DOING THIS
TO YOUR OWN WIFE.
447
00:21:14,306 --> 00:21:17,240
I'M NOT DOING IT,
KATHY IS.
448
00:21:17,242 --> 00:21:20,377
WHEN IT'S DONE
ROSEANNE'LL
SLEEP BETTER.
449
00:21:22,348 --> 00:21:23,413
AH.
450
00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:26,684
I'LL SLEEP BETTER.
451
00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:28,685
LIFE WILL BE GOOD--
452
00:21:28,687 --> 00:21:29,887
OR AT LEAST NORMAL.
453
00:21:29,889 --> 00:21:31,522
DO YOU HAVE
THE KITTEN?
454
00:21:31,524 --> 00:21:33,590
I HAVE THE KITTEN.
455
00:21:33,592 --> 00:21:35,325
[TAPE]
MEOW.
456
00:21:35,327 --> 00:21:37,027
MEOW.
457
00:21:37,029 --> 00:21:38,729
MEOW.
458
00:21:38,731 --> 00:21:39,730
MEOW.
459
00:21:43,869 --> 00:21:45,168
O.K., THERE SHE IS--
460
00:21:45,170 --> 00:21:46,603
EVER VIGILANT,
EVER PARANOID.
461
00:21:46,605 --> 00:21:48,438
SHE SPOTS THE BAIT...
462
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,440
REALIZING
HOW LAME THE TRICK IS...
463
00:21:50,442 --> 00:21:52,175
HOW EASY TO DETECT...
464
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,715
WAVES OF SUPERIORITY
WASH OVER HER.
465
00:21:58,951 --> 00:22:00,084
WHAT NOW?
466
00:22:00,086 --> 00:22:01,384
ONE OF TWO THINGS.
467
00:22:01,386 --> 00:22:03,921
EITHER SHE WON'T
OPEN THE DOOR OR...
468
00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:06,690
[ROSEANNE]
BECKY, IT'S FOR YOU.
469
00:22:06,692 --> 00:22:10,527
PERFECT. SHE GETS
EVEN FOR THE SNAKES.
470
00:22:10,529 --> 00:22:14,531
JEEZ, WHAT DO YOU GUYS
DO FOR THANKSGIVING
AROUND HERE?
471
00:22:15,901 --> 00:22:17,367
[DOOR OPENS]
472
00:22:17,369 --> 00:22:20,336
OH, LOOK A LITTLE KITTY.
473
00:22:23,408 --> 00:22:26,610
CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY
THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING
INSTITUTE, INC.
474
00:22:29,481 --> 00:22:32,616
PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS
PROHIBITED WITHOUT PERMISSION OF
NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE