♪ Dashing through the snow ♪
♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪
♪ O'er the fields we go ♪
I'm telling you, Rachel, they know!
Every day, Meachem makes some sort of insinuating comment.
"Hey, thanks for your input, Richard, uh
"we're gonna send you a Christmas card
when the project gets killed."
Killed! That's the word he used.
'He's trying to scare me into retracting that letter.'
(Rachel) 'Well, I can see that you're worried.'
- That much is clear. - I ought to be worried!
The company's betting millions on this drug.
And you were right to inform the FDA about the problems
but you did so completely anonymously.
Do you think I'm working myself up?
It has been known to happen.
Oh, thank you for your input.
You're very welcome.
This guy with his bright lights.
'H-he's speeding up.'
Dad? Dad, he's right on our bumper.
It's them.
It's the company.
[all screaming]
(Rachel) 'Go faster, Richard, faster!'
- 'Oh, God!' - 'Hold on, honey!'
Oh!
'Oh, watch out for the truck!'
[tires squealing]
[thud]
Get what we need, then kill them.
[groaning]
Rachel, Joel, are you alright?
- I think so. - Yeah. I'm fine, fine, dad.
- Joel? - I'm fine.
[Rachel groaning]
Oh, my God. They're coming.
[siren wailing]
[groans]
[speaking in foreign language]
[siren wailing]
[train honking]
Uh, Winston?
Chance, good morning.
Yeah, yeah. Who is this guy?
Oh, him? He's just a guy who's gonna deliver some stuff.
- Oh, yeah? What stuff? - You know, office stuff.
Oh, like erasers, paper clips, new fax machine?
Uh, not exactly.
Right, 'cause I know what kind of stuff he's bringing in.
Christmas stuff, probably a big tree, lights, wreath.
The same stuff I tell you not to get every year.
For your information...
Don't even try to tell me that it's some kind
of other stuff because it's not.
I've told you before, I don't like Christmas
never have, never will
even though you're some kinda
roly-poly Santa in traing or whatever.
Did you just call me roly-poly?
Did you just hire this guy to deliver Christmas stuff?
A tree is good for business.
- Clients like it. - This isn't about clients.
This is about you trying to instill in me
some kind of Christmas spirit
or something ridiculous like that.
You know what, there's nothing ridiculous
about having a little holiday spirit.
And you know what, you would know that
if you had a more traditional...
Childhood, happy Christmas mornings, that kind of thing?
Right, let it out. I know it hurts.
Yeah, well, the only one who's gonna hurt is you
if a tree shows up here.
Excuse me. Is, uh, one of you Christopher Chance?
Yeah, this one, unfortunately.
Oh, good. We, uh..
Uh, we got a problem.
So how long ago did you send the letter to the FDA?
About a month ago.
It detailed all of the research
that my company, Hoxton Moss Pharmaceuticals
has been covering up about a cholesterol drug
that they're bringing to the market.
What did the police have to say?
Well, they said they didn't have enough proof
and that if they did
prosecution meant that all of us
'are gonna have to go into some sort of, uh'
whistle-blower's protection program.
We'd have to disappear completely
our whole life basically erased.
Mr. Chance, no one will help us.
'We have nowhere else to turn!'
Listen, you came to the right place, we can help you.
Mr. Winston is gonna ask you a few questions.
I'll be back in a minute.
- 'So you wanted to see me?' - Yes.
And to think all it took
was two voice mails and three e-mails.
'Going somewhere?'
I leave for Uganda tonight.
I'll be gone through the New Year.
So if you'd be so kind
as to inform the rest of the team
I'd be most grateful.
What's in Uganda?
A number of charitable organizations
funded by Pucci Foundation.
They're usually short-staffed at this time of year
so I thought I could be of some use.
New clients?
Oh. Maybe.
So you're just skipping off to Uganda over Christmas, huh?
Holidays can be tough, especially if..
If?
Well, you know, if you've lost someone close to you.
It's not my favorite time of year, either.
Yes, well, um, well, I thank you for your concern
but... my trip has nothing to do with my husband's death.
It has to do with preserving what he worked on
during his life.
Okay.
Please relay my holiday wishes
to the rest of the team.
And I look forward
to continuing our work in the New Year.
Oh.
And happy Christmas, Mr. Chance.
Oh, merry. We say, "Merry Christmas."
I know. It just sounds a bit silly.
Yeah, it does, doesn't it?
[door opens]
Where's she headed?
[sighs]Away.
Yeah, well, apparently so are we.
[Run-D.M.C. singing "Christmas In Hollis"]
♪ Rhymes so loud and proud to hear it ♪
♪ It's Christmas time ♪
♪ And we got the spirit.. ♪
You gotta be kidding me.
♪ And that's what Christmas is all about ♪
♪ The time is now ♪ ♪ The place is here ♪
♪ And the whole wide world is filled with cheer ♪
♪ My name's D.M.C. with the mic in my hand.. ♪
- Where are we? - We're in hell.
♪ So open your eyes lend us a ear we wanna say ♪
♪ Merry Christmas and Happy New Year ♪
[theme music]
[music continues]
[instrumental music]
(Rachel) Good morning.
Joel, please.
Morning. Oh, come on.
I'm late. Who's taking me to school?
- Your father. - Your mother.
Alright, two minutes. You better be ready.
(Rachel) And, Joel, leave your laptop with me today.
Okay? My book club notes are on it.
'And I need to post to my blog later.'
Mom. No, okay?
It's my laptop now.
And don't use the word blog.
It embarrasses me for you.
- You and me, both. - 'Richard?'
Well, you know, you shouldn't be gossiping like that.
What are they arguing about?
Something about a blog?
- 'Hey, when can I get a car?' - Oh, brother.
- 'And then what about the van?' - Of course it's gossip.
Excuse me, folks, I'm sorry to interrupt..
[indistinct chattering]
Call it an art form, not...
Of course it's gossip. That's not gonna happen.
'That's not gonna happen.'
[whistles]
I'm sorry, but there are a few things we need to discuss here.
Wow!
You're an excellent whistler.
Thank you.
So here's the procedure.
We're gonna be protecting each one of you individually.
'Richard, Chance is gonna go with you to work.'
I'm gonna be the new Hoxton Moss office temp.
Office temp?
That sounds exciting.
- Who is she? - 'This is Ames.'
(Winston) 'Joel, Ames is going to school with you'
and then to your job after school at the mall
and then back here this evening.
Hey, Joel. Don't worry.
I'll try not to cramp your style too much.
Close your mouth, son.
Rachel, I'm gonna be here with you.
Here? But I'm having my book club over today.
We're starting "The Secret Life Of Bees."
No problem. I'm familiar with it.
And who is that near my roses?
(Chance) 'Oh, that's Guerrero.'
- He's just checking for bugs. - Bugs?
Not bugs... like your..
Forget it. Do you have any more bagels?
Of course. Anybody else?
(Ames) 'Yes, please.'
[instrumental music]
Hoxton Moss. How may I help you?
[telephone ringing]
[indistinct chattering]
Ah, there he is.
- 'My boss, Nick Meachem.' - Coffee's cold.
So he's the one you think is behind the attack, huh?
Yeah, well, before I wrote the letter, I went to him
and, uh, he said there's problems with the research.
And he said those were the sorts of objections
that could get an employee into serious trouble.
And he said it with real menace.
He's one of the people I named in the letter.
- 'A janitor?' - Your cover is office temp?
I'm a janitor?
You got something against
an honest day's work?
Uh, yeah. Actually, I do.
Applebaum.
You're late!
Good morning, sir.
Morning. Who are you?
Collingsworth. Paul Collingsworth.
A little help here, Applebaum.
I am the new office temp.
My agency worked it out with the HR.
Today's my first day with Hoxton Moss.
'I've been temping for ages.'
Temp work is anything but temporary for me
you might say.
You might say, not me.
Richard, I need your assessment reports ASAP, okay?
Then come and find me.
There are some things we need to discuss..
Privately.
Uh..
- What the.. - Sorry, sir.
[sighs]
Put a tracker on him when we shook hands.
I just lifted his keys.
I kinda like to think a placed tracker beats lifted keys.
- Don't you? - No, I don't.
And while we're, uh, sharing our opinions..
Dude!
What, you-you were raised in a barn or something?
Pick it up.
[instrumental "Deck The Halls"]
(Joel) 'This place sucks.'
I mean, all the action's on the other side of the mall.
Seriously, though, I feel like I owe you an apology.
I mean... it's one thing for me to live my crappy life
but making you do it, too
it's just cruel and unusual.
Are you kidding?
Free hot dogs..
You know, if this ain't living
I don't know what is.
Excuse me, can I get a..
- Hey, Joel. - Jamie.
- 'Hi.' - Hi. Hi, um..
I mean, do you want something?
I-I mean, I mean, w-what would you like?
I-I mean, w-what can I do for you
that you, that you would like?
Just a hot dog with mustard.
Mustard! Yeah, we have, uh, great quality mustard here.
We, uh, we specially make it with our special ingredients
you know, to really, you know, bring out the flavors.
So it's not so, like, mustardy, you know?
[chuckles] You're funny, Joel.
Extra mustard, on the house.
Thanks.
So are you going to Billy Backer's party tonight?
Uh, probably not.
I mean, my parents have, you know, um..
Sort of got me on a tight leash, you know
almost, uh, noose-like.
Bummer.
Well, only because you always play such cool music
and Billy's stuff is always so lousy.
Well, uh, I'll see you tomorrow.
- See ya. - 'Let me guess.'
(Ames) 'You like her.'
I mean, obviously she's not interested.
Come on, Joel, wake up and smell the mustard.
She just invited you to a party.
- You think? - Yeah.
Any chance you think my parents might let me go?
Tsk. Not until we find out who's trying to kill 'em.
[dramatic music]
[beeping]
[instrumental music]
[whirring]
I'm literally... in hell.
[telephone ringing]
Hoxton Moss. Paul Collingsworth speaking.
Hey, Meachem just said that the company
knows about the letter.
Did he accuse you of writing it?
Uh, well, no, not directly
but he told me to go downstairs to the archives
to get a file!
'There's nothing down there'
that can't be accessed by this computer.
I'm telling you, Chance, the archives are empty.
He's up to something. It's a setup!
- That's good. - What? It's what?
It's not good, it's bad! It's the opposite of good.
It is a good thing, it just means
this is gonna come to an end quicker for both of us.
Richard, you have to trust me, okay?
[sighs]
Alright.
[cell phone ringing]
- Yo. - Where are you?
Restocking. Why? What's up?
Well, now would be a good time
for the janitor to check the trash
in Meachem's office.
Got it. On my way.
[instrumental music]
[indistinct chattering]
[telephone ringing]
[beeping]
- 'We got him.' - Go, now.
[instrumental music]
[dramatic music]
- 'Hello, Richard.' - Oh!
We know it was you who wrote the FDA.
Okay, Nick, don't come any closer.
What were you thinking?
Do you have any idea what you have done?
You made a huge mistake, Richard.
Don't do that. You'll reg.. Nick!
[groans]
- What the.. - You selfish son of a bitch!
How could you do this to the company?
- Who the hell are you, again? - Collingsworth.
- Paul Collingsworth, the temp. - The temp?
(Chance) 'When I saw him about to attack you, well..'
[chuckles] I knew I had to do something.
Ow!
[paper rustling]
This is a list of all the people
who could lose their jobs because of your letter.
Nick! Can I call you Nick?
Is it okay with you if I escort this lowlife
right out of the building? Come on, you..
This isn't over, Richard, but you will be hearing
from our attorneys.
Yeah.
[sighs] Alright.
I guess Meachem's not trying to kill me.
The question is now, who is?
[instrumental music]
- Mm, mm, mm. - Winston, help!
Hey, what, did you see something?
No, it's this damn laptop.
I can't seem to find my book club notes anywhere.
Joel must have put them somewhere.
Mm.
Alright, let me take a crack at it.
Ah, thank you.
I'm just not myself these days.
None of us are.
I'm sure you've noticed how short Richard and I've been
with each other.
Well, I've been married before.
It kinda comes with the territory.
The other night, he was so on edge that he snapped at me
for wanting to put up the Christmas decorations.
He did?
Do you know that Chance doesn't even want us
to have a Christmas tree in the office?
- You believe that? - Oh, no.
Is it really necessary for your people
to ruin all of my landscaping?
What are you talk..
- Get down! - Aah!
[gunshots]
Try and get back in the laundry room.
Keep the door closed and stay down!
[groans]
[dramatic music]
[groans]
[grunts]
[door opens]
Is, uh, book club canceled?
Uh..
Rachel.
[dramatic music]
One of the guys who attacked the house this afternoon
dropped his cell phone.
Guerrero's busy trying to pull
whatever information he can out of there.
Rachel, could you think of a reason
why someone would wanna kill you?
- Me? - Oh, my God.
It's her blog!
- What? - Her blog. She has a blog.
It's about the whole town
and it's filled with gossip!
(Rachel) 'What are you talking about?'
What I post is totally innocuous.
You wrote about Ron Moodie. He had an affair.
That's what you wrote. Then his wife left him.
'And then Amy O'Connell.'
She writes that she's cheating on her taxes!
You can't get into people's business like that, honey.
- They come and get you! - It's one of my creative..
This is ridiculous.
'Blog?'
What do you say we just tie 'em up
and let Guerrero handle the rest of it?
You serious? There's some duct tape right there.
No, you don't understand!
You know, you don't appreciate what I do..
[whistles]
I've been shot at, I've been thrown out of an airplane
been generally mistreated by a lot of very bad people
but this bickering is pretty much more than I can take
so I'm gonna go outside and get some fresh air.
When I get back, you two had better be calmed down
or we're breaking out the ball gags.
Wow!
He's a good whistler, too.
What's going on down there?
Chance and Winston are, uh..
Helping your parents communicate a little better.
'It's nothing to worry about, okay?'
I can practically see
Billy Backer's house from here.
Oh, right, yeah. The party that Jamie mentioned.
The one that she invited me to.
That was pretty cool.
Yeah, it was, it was..
Pretty cool.
Do you wanna go?
- Where? - The party.
Just go out of the window, climb down the trellis.
No one's gonna even know we're gone.
Seriously? You mean, like, sneak out?
I've... never actually done that before.
[chuckles] Then, jeez, it's time to pop your cherry.
Uh, I mean, as far as, uh, sneaking out goes.
That's where the proverbial cherry popping stops.
But if we leave, that means that Chance and Winston
are gonna have to protect mom and dad by themselves.
Yes, it's a very good point you make there, Joel.
And while I do appreciate that you realize
that I am the muscle behind this operation
uh, in this instance
I think your mom and dad are gonna be good.
[sighs] I don't know.
Oh, come on, take it from me.
Sometimes being bad can feel pretty good.
Okay.
Oh, uh, you, you might wanna leave the laptop here.
But all my music is on it
and Jamie said that she likes my music, remember?
Okay.
[music playing over loudspeakers]
[all cheering]
Just don't embarrass me, okay, Ames?
And no telling anyone that you're my bodyguard.
Okay. Got it.
Hey. Hold it there, buddy.
Jonas Brothers' fan club meets down the street.
Hold it there, Joel.
You're with him?
Yeah. You got a problem with that?
[rap song]
So what do you think? It's fun, right?
Yeah. I can't believe I'm actually here.
- Thanks, Ames. - No worries.
Joel! Cool!
You came.
Jamie, hi.
Oh, I-I'm gonna go and, uh, grab a beer.
Um, I'll be right back.
♪ Got me around with my hand in my pocket ♪
Is that your girlfriend?
Well, um..
Uh, w-we used to date
but now we're, you know, just friends.
Okay.
[bells ringing]
Putting aside the blog hypothesis for a minute
earlier this afternoon, Guerrero found a business card
in Meachem's office with a Swedish address and number.
Does that mean anything to you?
Swedish? Uh..
Well, look, the guys who ran us off the road
that night, they were not speaking English.
I couldn't place it at the time. It could have been Swedish.
Aren't the Klaxons from down the street originally from Sweden?
- No, no. They're just Canadian. - Oh, that's right.
[cell phone ringing]
Yeah, what do you got, Guerrero?
Yeah, the thugs that showed up at book club
work for a guy by the name of Severenson Kleman.
He's a Swedish game-designer-turned-hacker.
He now specializes in something called zombie bots.
Zombie what?
(Guerrero) 'It's invisible software'
buried deep inside a computer game.
When you play the game
the software takes over your computer
without you realizing it
kinda making your computer a..
Oh, zombie. Right, clever.
So this guy pays off Meachem
for e-mails to Hoxton Moss employees.
They play the game, bam.
They've got access to the company server.
(Chance on phone) 'That's pretty damn clever.'
Yeah. Wish I'd have thought of it myself.
So anyone in the family a gamer?
[My Chemical Romance singing "Na Na Na"]
[indistinct chattering]
♪ Na na na na ♪
♪ Burning your ♪
[cell phone ringing]
♪ Na na na na ♪
♪ Let's blow an artery.. ♪
Okay, look, before you start on me...
Where the hell are you? You have Joel?
Yes, and everything's fine.
We're just at a house party down the street...
Ames... Joel is the one they're after
'not the father, not the mother, it's Joel.'
Right, well, uh, that explains
the two professional mouth breathers
that just walked in. Look, we're down the street.
- 'Just get here now.' - Stay here!
- Yeah, I have... - We gotta talk.
- Joel? - Uh, what are you doing?
We were totally, like, connecting.
Oh, that's awesome, Joel.
Less awesome is the fact that two thugs
just walked in, apparently looking for you.
- What? - Friends of yours?
♪ And the sky opened up ♪
♪ Everybody wants to change the world.. ♪
Oh, what the fuck?
Get out of the way, man! Hey, hey!
[indistinct chattering]
[girl screaming]
Whoa! Joel Applebaum's getting his ass kicked!
- Go, girl! - 'Hey, hey, hey!'
(male ♪1) Run, Joel, run!
[Ames screaming]
♪ Na na na na ♪
[tires screeching]
Hey, Ames, you okay?
[indistinct chattering]
(male ♪2) 'Oh, holy Christmas!'
Oh, gnarly.
Is that dude with Joel Applebaum?
Yeah, he is.
Stay off drugs. I'll be watching.
[indistinct chattering]
[instrumental music]
You call this protection?
In the course of one day, one single day.
Chance levels me like a linebacker
my wife is shot at and shoved into a closet
and my son is nearly killed at a kegger!
We understand this might seem
a little unorthodox to you Mr. Applebaum.
Joel, you play a game called Zombie Circus?
Um, yeah.
I got an e-mail offering me
a free 30-day trial of the game
and I played it.
And, well, the game totally sucked.
Even worse, it practically shredded my hard drive
with some sort of virus. I-I got angry.
I..
Hacked into the site of the company that made the game.
I wanted to teach them a lesson
so I erased all their files.
You.. What did you do?
(Joel) 'I know. I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry.'
I was just so angry and I didn't think
that... that, you know, something like this would happen.
It seems your little hacking job effectively erased
all of Kleman's stolen Hoxton Moss files
'which we can assume, were very valuable.'
But there are still some copies
of the stolen files on your laptop.
S-so what? Now these guys wanna kill me?
(Nick) Why are your feet on my desk?
- Who are you? - The janitor.
- Have a seat. - Get out of my office.
You, Nick..
[door shuts]
Are what we in the custodial arts
like to call a real douche.
Tell me how I can get in touch with Severenson Kleman..
Who we both know you're in business with.
'My boss wants to talk to your boss'
and you're gonna help.
And I really hate having to explain myself
to people in your position, so..
Let's just say, in this case, uh..
I's gonna involve this stapler.
I'm calling security.
[groans]
[thud]
'Now, how do I contact Kleman?'
[groans]
Crappy office, by the way.
[cell phone ringing]
- Yes. - 'We have the laptop.'
And who would I be speaking with?
Oh, that's irrelevant.
What's important is we're willing
to arrange to give it back to you
'in exchange for you leaving'
'Joel and his family alone.'
'So where and when would you like'
'to conduct the exchange?'
Well, let's see.
How about this afternoon..
In the mall
where young Joel sells hot dogs?
(Kleman on phone) 'A nice public place'
'lots of innocent bystanders.'
'I will send a man'
'and you send Joel with the laptop.'
- Joel? - 'Yes!'
And if we see anyone else but him..
You, the police, anyone..
Then the whole family dies.
'Maybe not right away, but eventually.'
You can't protect them forever, whoever you are.
Do we have a deal?
Yeah. You got a deal.
- Absolutely not. - It's not gonna happen.
At least they agree on something.
Richard, Rachel, listen, just hear us out.
We understand your concern, and we can protect Joel.
Not sending him means this thing just continues.
Now, Kleman was right about one thing.
We can't protect you forever.
Mr. Chance.
You must realize that Joel's not like one of you.
Uh, he's..
Well, he's practically afraid of his own shadow!
You mind if I talk to Joel alone?
[sighs]Alright.
Make sure he don't hack into anything.
Joel... why don't you give the computer a rest
have a seat?
- Is everything okay? - Yeah.
So how you holding up?
Okay, I guess.
I mean, I still can't believe all this is all my fault.
No, it's not your fault.
But here's the situation.
I spoke with the guy who wants the computer.
He said he's willing to call off the dogs
if we give it back to him, but the condition is
you've got to bring it to him this afternoon personally
at the mall where you work.
Me?
[sighs]
Jeez, this really is shaping up
to be the worst Christmas ever.
Yeah, well, they're all equally annoying if you ask me
but then again, I didn't... grow up
with the kinda family you have.
Your parents care about you a great deal.
So you can imagine they're not too thrilled
about the idea of you making the exchange.
But you think I should.
I know we can protect you.
What matters is whether or not you think you can do it.
If you can't... don't worry about it.
We'll find another way.
But if you ask me, in this life..
You get pushed around
just about as long as you don't push back.
For what it's worth, if he says he can do this
I think we can pull it off.
Okay, you're saying this whole thing
rests on Joel's decision. That is patently absurd.
He's not old enough to decide something like this for himself.
- He's 16 years old! - I think you're wrong.
(Joel) 'Dad..'
I can do it.
I really think that I can do it, we can do it.
Yeah, well, it's not open for discussion, Joel. Have a seat.
Chance, Winston, and Ames can protect me.
I trust them to, and-and you should, too.
I mean, what's the alternative, run forever?
Kid has a point.
Mr. Chance.
Do you have children?
- No. - Close family?
No.
All due respect..
I don't think you understand
what you're asking of us.
You know, maybe you're right.
Maybe I don't have any idea
what it's like to have a family
but I do know how to protect one..
Better than anyone.
'Now, you let Joel do this, we put these guys away'
and you and your family get your lives back.
But that is not something
that you can absolutely promise, is it?
I just did.
[indistinct chattering]
Alright, Joel, you got any questions?
You feel good about everything?
I think I'm fine.
Kleman e-mailed me a picture
of the guy you're gonna be meeting.
He's gonna be sitting at a table
'right in front of the hot dog stand.'
(Richard) 'And all Joel's gonna do'
is put this laptop on a table
and just walk away, right?
Exactly. It's okay.
Chance, Winston, and Guerrero
are gonna there be with him the whole way, okay?
He's gonna have a mic and a camera on him.
We're gonna be able to hear and see everything.
Now, Joel, once you've made the drop
and you're back here safely
we're gonna follow the laptop to Kleman.
We'll take him out, by which time
you're gonna be back here with your dad and Ames.
- Okay. - 'Alright?'
'I'm gonna go get into position.'
Ames is gonna tell you when to move.
Hey. You're gonna be great.
(Richard) Chance!
Uh, I want you to understand..
Uh, h-he's my son.
He's all we got.
Richard, I'm not gonna let anything happen to him.
Are you okay, Mr. Applebaum?
I'm doing my best.
'I'm glad I talked Rachel out of coming.'
She couldn't take this.
I can't take it.
Ames, look. One more time.
Explain to me where Chance and his team are going to be.
Ho-ho ho-ho!
(Winston) I never felt more ridiculous in my life.
'Where are you, Guerrero?'
Is this somebody's idea of a joke?
A janitor again?
What are you complaining about? You see what I'm wearing?
I thought you liked Christmas.
'Now, smile, will ya? You're scaring the kids.'
Okay, Ames. We're ready. Start bringing Joel down.
Okay, Joel. It's time.
This is our camera and mic.
You're gonna do great, son.
And remember..
You're an Applebaum.
[instrumental music]
[indistinct chattering]
(Chance on radio) 'Alright, he's heading to the food court.'
Got him.
(Chance) 'There he is, Joel. Make the drop.'
Joel, is that you? Oh, my God, you have got..
- Oh, God, that-that's Jamie! - Who the hell's she?
The entire school is talking about it.
We might have a problem here, Chance.
Jamie, I'll tell you about it later
but right now I have to go, okay?
Lose her.
Bring me the laptop and the boy.
Alright, people, let's get ready to move.
Jamie, I really have to go now, okay?
Look, just go now, okay?
(Jamie) What the heck are you talking about?
It's time to go, Joel.
- 'Chance, he's got Joel.' - Let's go. Now.
We are trying to have a private conversation...
I'm sorry, Jamie. I'm sorry.
- 'Really?' - I'll see you later, okay?
- 'Where are we going?' - They're not letting him go.
They're taking him.
Here's the laptop. I mean, you can just..
[groans] Look, where are we going? I..
(Joel on radio) 'You-you just said you need the laptop.'
You're being followed. Stop them!
[grunts]
[gasps]
♪ I see trees of green ♪
♪ Red roses too ♪
♪ I see them bloom ♪
♪ For me and you ♪
♪ And I say to myself ♪
♪ What a wonderful world.. ♪
- You okay? - Yeah, yeah, I think. Yeah.
- Where's the bag? - I don't, I don't know.
♪ Bright sunny days ♪
♪ The dark sacred nights ♪
♪ And I think to myself ♪
♪ What a wonderful world.. ♪
[screaming]
(male ♪3) 'That jackass is ruining Christmas!'
- 'Watch out!' - 'Look out, look out!'
[woman screaming]
♪ And I say to myself ♪
[indistinct chattering]
♪ What a wonderful world ♪
The mall at Christmas. What a zoo.
Fire in the hole!
(Winston) 'Oh! Alright.'
[chuckles] You're not the only ones
who live on the edge.
- I can't thank you enough. - Ah!
I talked to Hoxton Moss.
They said Meachem was acting alone
and they're gonna cooperate with the FDA, so I keep my job.
- That's good. - Glad we could be of help.
- Winston, I'm gonna miss you. - Aw..
It was nice having someone to talk to.
Well, I hope it's gonna be nicer to talk to me.
I know I haven't been very easy to live with
but that's gonna change. I promise.
- Hm.. - Did you believe any of that?
- Almost. - Not so much?
Well, it's not like you're not gonna see me
ever again, right? Thursday at 4:00?
What's Thursday at 4:00?
Book club.
And that's a lovely tree
you have there, by the way.
Thank you, Winston.
[doorbell rings]
[door opens]
- Hey. - Uh. Oh..
Uh, Jamie, hi.
Um, how are you? I..
Sorry about the mix-up at the mall.
I really didn't know what I was thinking.
- Sorry. - Are you kidding me?
That was the coolest thing I've ever seen!
You were like a, a real-life action hero.
[chuckles] Uh, thanks.
- Yeah. - Um, well, great.
I guess, uh, I guess I'll see you tomorrow.
Joel!
♪ He's gone.. ♪
[stammering]
Jamie. Jamie, wait. I, um..
That's, uh..
Yeah, it's mistletoe.
♪ The snow is falling down.. ♪
Oh. Hold on.
Just give him a second.
- Uh... - He can handle it.
He's an Applebaum.
♪ The children will sing.. ♪
I'll see you tomorrow.
♪ Christmas time ♪
♪ In these frozen and silent nights.. ♪
- Hey, dudes. - What's up with this?
Winston, you shouldn't have.
But I did.
Merry Christmas, pal.
Ho-ho ho!
Anybody want a scotch?
Stole the bottle from Meachem's office.
Yeah. I'll take a double.
♪ Sparkle ♪
♪ Our hearts were singing ♪
You know, I always wondered what it would be like..
You know, to grow up in the burbs
in a normal family.
All I know is I'd rather be tortured by a..
Well, by me..
Than ever have to go back there again.
Suburbs blow.
Alright, that's it for me. I gotta go.
Yeah. Yeah, me, too.
I'm exhausted. See you guys.
Come on. I'll give you a lift.
I got a meeting with the plumber.
- The plumber? - Yeah, I don't wanna miss him.
It's past midnight.
It's not a plumber, the plumber.
Forget about it, dude. You don't wanna know.
[elevator bell dings]
Yeah, I was just checking the water.
Ilsa.
I thought you were gone through New Year's.
- You were right. - About what?
[sighs] I went away to throw myself into work
because I thought it might help me forget
about Marshall being gone.
But it didn't.
Well, some things you can't run away from
no matter how far you go.
Are you drinking alone during the holidays?
Not anymore.
Even before Marshall's death
this wasn't my favorite time of year.
- Why not? - Oh, I don't know.
It always seemed a time
saved for normal families.
That wasn't you?
No, it wasn't.
Well..
Well, here's to abnormal families.
[clinking]
Say... Ilsa.
Seeing that, you know, the holidays aren't really
all they're cracked up to be..
What do you say we, uh, get rid of that tree?
It's more of a Winston thing. I'm the only one who lives here.
- You're the boss. - I mean, that's true.
[sighs] But I quite like what it represents.
Something to aspire to.
The tree stays.
Happy Christmas, Mr. Chance.
Merry Christmas, Mrs. Pucci.
[sighs]
[instrumental music]
♪ Oh Christmas tree oh Christmas tree ♪
♪ Your leaves are so unchanging ♪
♪ Oh Christmas tree oh Christmas tree ♪
♪ Your leaves are so unchanging ♪
♪ Not only green ♪
♪ When summer's here ♪
♪ But also when ♪
♪ 'Tis cold and clear ♪
♪ Christmas tree ♪
♪ Oh Christmas tree ♪