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Daddy, it's 7.30!
Daddy, wake up!
Morning, Daddy. Come on, wake up!
Wake up! Come on, wake up.
- There's your coffee right there. - Where am I?
Here, I want you to drink this.
Then take a shower and get dressed. Your clothes are there.
Then I want you to see the woman about the job. Today. You promised.
I know. What would I do without you nagging me all the time?
You really want me to answer that?
Yeah, I've been gettin' in kinda late lately. We haven't had a chance to talk.
Don't worry about it. There hasn't been a lot to say.
- Is everything all right with you? - Yeah.
- Is school good? - No, but it never is.
- Have you been asked to the prom? - No. Not yet.
When was the last time I told you how beautiful you are?
About yesterday.
- Turn around. - What?
You know what. Let me see this outfit.
- Is this your latest creation? - This is it.
My God, what did that cost you?
About $15 for the shoes, second-hand, and I made the rest.
Unbelievable.
I was thinking maybe that you could do something with this.
- Maybe put some ruffles here... - Come on, get up!
Really, I mean it. This means a lot to me.
I am perfectly happy with what I'm doing.
Perfectly happy with part-time work?
- No. That's why I'm getting up. - OK. I'll make you some breakfast.
I'm up.
- Hi, Blane. - Hi, Kate. How you doin'?
- Fine. How are you? - Good.
Morning! Welcome to another day of higher education.
- Hi, Duckie. How are you? - Not bad, considering I'm in this dump.
This is a really volcanic ensemble you're wearing.
- Volcanic? - You know, hot, dangerous...
- Are you going to class today? - I don't know if I'm emotionally ready.
Go for it. It's virtually painless.
- I gotta go. I'll see you at lunch. - OK.
I'll call the cafeteria and make a reservation - two by the window.
Sure.
No, you don't like to sit in the sun. OK, something else.
Listen, may I admire you again today?
Ladies. I may be able to work out a deal
where either one or the both of you could be pregnant by the holidays.
Some argue that the New Deal saved the capitalist system.
There's evidence that the Roosevelt administration
was trying to avoid excessive governmental power,
rather than implant socialism.
In his first act as president,
Mr Roosevelt enacted the Emergency Banking Act,
and he refused to consider nationalisation.
Where'd you get your clothes? Five-and-dime store? Attractive!
Is there a problem, ladies?
- No. - No.
Andie, is there something going on between you and these ladies?
No, not that I'm aware of.
I'd like to apologise on behalf of Miss Strombley and Miss Henson.
They will be thinking of you tonight
as they write a summary of the chapters that we've just covered.
Great!
- Excuse me. - Yeah?
There's nothing wrong with me. I'm fine. Can you just forget about the chapter?
- Yes? - We'll take the chapter.
Fine. Let's go on.
The Emergency Banking Act.
I'll see you guys later.
Andie, you look ravishing.
So we graduate in a month.
When are you and I gonna get together and do something?
Try never.
- I'm talking about more than sex here. - No, you're not.
I've liked you for four years and you treat me like shit.
I don't understand that. What's your problem?
Can you get off of my car?
I've been out with a lot of girls at this school.
- What makes you so different? - I have some taste.
You're a bitch.
You oughta see a doctor. That condition of yours could get a lot worse.
Applause, applause, applause.
This is beautiful. It's so...
modern.
I mean, is this fab or what?
It's great.
- I'm very, very good at this. - I know.
It's such a waste that I own a lowly little retail outfit.
- No, not if you're good at it. - I'm good in bed. Should I be a whore?
It's great.
- Did you say you went to your prom? - Yeah, sure.
- Was it terrible? - It was the worst.
But it's supposed to be. But you have to go, right?
You don't have to. I mean, it's not a requirement.
A girlfriend of mine didn't go to hers.
Once in a while she gets a terrible feeling, like something is missing.
She checks her purse and her keys, she counts her kids, she goes crazy.
And then she realises that...
nothing is missing.
She decided it was side effects from skipping the prom.
I don't know. Part of me says just go and get it over with,
and this other part says it's a stupid tradition and what's the point?
Well, you know...
You could say that life itself is a stupid tradition.
Don't analyse it. Just go.
Put that back!
- You missed my eye by an inch! - Half an inch.
This ain't the public library, lightfingers!
I'll get it!
Trax. What do you want?
Tyrone, you blow.
Yeah, I'm workin'. Leave me alone.
That's thrilling!
I cook for you, I do your laundry, I sleep with you,
now you want a ride to work?
Grow up!
Take the bus...
How you doin'?
- Fine. - Good.
- Can I help you? - Yeah.
- Can I get your opinion on something? - Maybe.
Maybe.
This any good?
It's hot. White hot.
Good, I'll take it.
OK. That'd be cash or charge?
American Express Platinum Card, maybe?
Cash.
You know, every time you go to the john, you lose IQ points.
It's Walter Mondale.
- Just 7.50. There's your change. - Thanks.
- I don't need a bag. - No?
- Thanks. - Enjoy it.
Bondage has no place in my life. Since when?
Since I spent the night tied up in the back seat of your car!
- Jena. - Yeah?
Would you ever consider going out with somebody that had money?
I don't think it makes a difference. I mean...
It's material.
Simon! Simon!
What would you do if your father came home a rich man?
- Kiss his ass. - See?
- See what? - What Simon just said.
What...
What are you gettin' at? Are you goin' out with a rich guy?
- I gotta go. - Hey, you didn't answer my question.
- No. - Good.
Simon, it's been stimulating.
- How long have I been coming here? - I dunno. A couple of years.
- OK, so we're buddies, we're close. - Yeah. Very pally.
OK! So how many times have you let me in?
- I never let you in. You know that. - You see what I'm sayin'?
- I dunno. What are you sayin'? - My girlfriend is in there and I'm here...
Well, she's a girl and she's my friend, so she's a girl friend.
But she's in there and I'm out here! You're a sensitive, sexually potent guy.
- You gotta know how that hurts! - Let me ask you a question, seriously.
Why does she come here, knowing I don't let you in?
- Think about it. - I don't know.
Anyway, my advice to you is...
dump her, lose her. You don't need that.
You see what I'm sayin'? You see the point I'm tryin' to make?
Love's a bitch, Duck. Love's a bitch.
- Ain't it the truth? - It's the truth.
- High five. - All right!
Wanna try a cigarette?
Let me ask you a personal question.
If you worship the Duck, why not hang out somewhere he could get in?
Nice Dice Man! Say hello to the wife and kids. You know what I'm sayin'?
He's dyslexic. He gets everything backwards. He meant to say...
- It's OK, Duckie. - OK. You're sure?
I could clean up this parking lot with his butt.
- No, I'm fine. Don't worry about me. - OK.
- Were you here long? - No, no. Three, four hours.
You have a good time?
- Good. That's good. What now? - Bed.
Yours or mine?
- Ours? - Nice try.
OK. Can you at least give me a ride home?
Yeah. Get in.
Can I put my head in your lap?
Can I rest my head on your shoulder and let you steer?
- Get in, Duckie. - OK.
These houses are amazing, Duck.
The first million I make, I'll buy you one. I hate this song.
- They're so beautiful. - You want beauty, look in the mirror.
This whole tape is horrible.
It must be, like, a hormone thing. Every song is making me sick.
I mean, why can't I find a decent song here?
- That was my favourite. - Are you deaf?
The house!
Yeah. That's a nice little crib.
I wonder what it's like inside.
Well, what difference does it make?
You know what the really sad thing is?
I bet the people that live there don't think it's half as pretty as I do.
You know, Andie, I'm just...
They just don't write love songs like they used to. I...
I'm angry about this now. My evening's shot. Just drive me home, now.
The reason I came over, other than I'd been planning to come and say hello,
- I wanted to talk to you about Andie. - Yeah?
She's an incredible individual. You know that.
I mean, I'm there for her. Whenever, however, I'm there.
You can rest assured that she's covered.
I don't want you to worry, because my only plans
are to make sure that she's taken care of.
That's nice of you, Phil.
And I'd like to marry her.
Well, not today. But eventually, I figure.
Well, does Andie know how you feel about this?
No confirmation on that just yet. I'm layin' the groundwork.
I'm thinkin' in terms of housing, food, basic needs.
But I'm picking my moment.
- I mean, you understand, right? - Sure.
I felt the same way about somebody myself.
A girl?
A girl.
I loved her and I married her.
And one day she just split.
Wait, this was Andie's mom?
Yeah.
So I haven't seen her in three years, you know, and...
But I still love her just as much as I ever did, you know?
You can love Andie, but that doesn't mean she'll love you back.
It doesn't mean she won't, but...
What I'm trying to say is you can't make it happen.
It either will or it won't.
- It's all in the heart. - Yeah, sure. Cardiovascular.
Yeah. I understand. I've been to school.
Well, I got an appointment with a vacuum cleaner. Gotta go.
You're on a whole home-improvement jag.
- Yeah. Turning the old life around. - More power to ya.
If Tina Turner can do it, Jack Walsh can do it too.
Thanks for taking your time. I really... I appreciate it.
- My pleasure. - I'm off like a dirty shirt.
Tina Turner.
Hiya.
We just got these glasses in. They're really...
I didn't like that album I got the other day.
What?
- The record. - The record.
I thought it was a little too...
Too hip, maybe.
- Yeah, a little too hip. - Well...
Think you can recommend something else? A little less political?
- Lionel Richie? - Nah.
Well...
- Teena Marie? Madonna? - Madonna? That's awfully deep.
Yeah, very deep. But she's got such great style.
Listen...
That's the alarm. Can you hold on a second? I'll be right back.
Here. Read this. It's really good.
What is this?
Hi! How was your day?
Bet it pumps out about 300 decibels, huh?
- Did you do this? - I'm not sure.
I was just using your powder room and I decided not to disturb you,
so I was gonna go out the back door, but I must have touched somethin'.
- How'd you get in here? - Are you mad?
Yes, I'm mad! There are public bathrooms everywhere!
I'm not nine, Andie. I know that.
It's the end of the month. They're out of toilet-seat covers.
- Blane, what are you doing? - Hey, buddy. Nothin'. Hangin' out.
- What are you shopping for? Records? - I guess.
- Find anything? - No, not really.
Are we gonna shoot some trap or what? If we are, we gotta shake it.
I don't have any place to go. I like coming here. Excuse me very much.
OK. I'm sorry for getting mad at you. I gotta get back. See you later.
This is a shitty alarm system! I opened the door five times before it rang.
That's it! I'm leaving. I'm not gonna stay here. No! No way!
Hi. It's 6.05. Duckie Dale. Give me a call.
6.15. Duckie Dale again. Call me, OK?
Andie, where are you? This is the Duck. Give me a call, OK?
It's 6.28...
Please call. Please, please, please.
This is Duckie. Are you really home and not picking up?
Cos if so, I feel like a giant asshole here.
It's 6.31 . Give me a call, OK?
Duckie, I'll talk to you in the morning. Bye.
- Why are you up? I didn't wake you yet. - I'm fixing you breakfast.
One egg over medium, and I fed the dog.
- Did Daddy feed you, hm? - Your egg, madame.
I don't eat eggs, Daddy. Why don't you eat it?
- I'll bring you your coffee and juice. - OK.
- Since when don't you like eggs? - Since about birth. Don't worry about it.
- You never told me why you were up. - It's morning.
You mean why didn't you have to drag my ass out of bed?
OK.
Well, I got a job.
- No? - Yeah.
- Where? - Well, I'll tell you after I start.
- When's that? - Soon.
- I'm so proud of you. You got the job. - No big deal.
Yes, it is a big deal. It's a very big deal.
Listen, I gotta go. I'm gonna be late for school.
- Tell me all about it tonight. - All right. It'll be real good.
Hi, guys.
- How you doin'? - Fine. You?
I'm OK. And you?
- Well, I just said I was fine. - Oh, yeah. Sorry.
- So, is this your first time out here? - Yeah.
I don't think I'm very popular out here either.
I dunno. You're just fine inside.
I don't know. I'm not really into all this shit, you know?
Yeah.
I really liked your computer trick.
- Clever, huh? - Terribly clever, yeah. Terribly.
- Are you late for something? - Yeah, I am, as a matter of fact.
But it's no big deal.
Listen, do you wanna go out Friday?
Yeah.
- Yeah? - Sure.
Yeah? OK!
- Seven o'clock OK? - Yeah, that's fine.
Great. Where do you live? I'll pick you up.
- Where do you live? - No, I'm sorry.
I'll be working on Friday, so just pick me up at the mall.
- OK. - OK.
- Bye. - See you.
Hey, Blane. How you doin'?
Hey, buddy. What's up?
- What are you up to? - Not much, going to class.
Well, I saw you outside.
- So? - So, what were you doing?
What are you? My mother? Come on, I gotta go. I'll see you later.
- Blane, what's goin' on? - Nothing.
Well, not nothing. I saw you talking to that chick, what's her name, Eddie?
- So what do you care? - My best friend is talking to a mutant.
I'm curious. That's no reason to get defensive.
I'm not defensive. I just happen to like her, all right?
Listen, all right. It's your life. It's none of my business.
You really don't think she's got something?
No. I really don't. I'm sorry.
You're gonna be late, buddy.
The Warsaw Pact was a treaty signed by the Soviet Union
and seven East European satellites.
What it did was it...
it established a mutual defence organisation as...
Duckie!
What? What, what? Well, what'd I put?
You wrote "The Warsaw Pact is the pact that was named after Warsaw."
The teacher'll know you're bullshitting.
OK, OK. What about the rest of it?
The Russian Revolution did not take place in Germany.
- What was Karl Marx, then? - He was a German.
- Well, there you go. - Yes, but his being German
has nothing to do with where the Russian Revolution occurred!
OK, OK.
OK, can I propose something to you without you getting upset or angry?
- That depends. - On what?
I dunno. I just said that. Go ahead.
You're deliberately flunking your courses so you can stay in high school.
Get out of here! Why would I do that?
- I dunno. You tell me. - Well, I'm not, so there's nothing to tell.
- You're not always one to face things. - What am I not facing?
The future.
Whether or not you face the future, it happens, right?
- You run yourself down. Why? - I am not running myself down!
You think I am? I don't think I am.
Why? Because of the way I dress? Cos I can laugh at myself?
That's called a sense of humour. You should get one, they're nice.
- What are we gonna do next year? - You think I'll still be in school.
I'm serious! Not a day has passed in eight years
when I didn't talk to you at least 20 times!
Well, that's devotion.
I know. Even if I sometimes get angry, you know that I secretly love it.
You see, I knew that.
I hope I'm not the only one that knows how incredible you are.
Well, at this point in time, I'm afraid you are, honey.
I'm gonna get something to drink, and then we work, OK?
- You bet. - OK. What do you want?
- Beer, Scotch, juice box. Whatever. - OK.
Oh, God.
I love this woman.
I love this woman and I have to tell her,
and if she laughs, she laughs.
And if she doesn't love me, she doesn't love me,
but if I don't find out...
I love her too much!
Love is real.
Thank you, thank you.
Real is love.
You're a wonderful crowd here, you know that.
Love is living
You're fabulous. I do love you. You're gorgeous, I love your hair.
Love is feeling
Feeling love
Love is wanting
She's gonna laugh. Would I blame her?
- There you go. - Thanks, but I'm gonna split.
- Why? What about your paper? - That's what I'm gonna do.
If you help me, thanks a lot, but it won't be my work, it'll be bogus.
And I guess I'll see you in the a.m.
Drinking and driving don't mix. That's why I ride a bike.
So, are you going out this weekend?
I dunno. I'm not sure yet.
- What are you gonna do? - Stay at home.
- Yeah? Are you gonna study again? - Probably. Would you put that out?
Why do you study so much? It makes me ill. I just don't see the point.
No? I don't wanna work in a record store my whole life.
What do you wanna be? A doctor?
Oh, God.
OK, let's go, everybody. Get in your lines, please! Thank you.
- Vormeister! - Here!
Bassett!
- Bassano - Yeah!
- Look. Watch out. - Do we smell bad or something?
Benny.
I hope they shrivel up and fall off, OK?
What was that, Miss Homan?
I said "I hope they shrivel up and fall off'.
You hope what shrivels up and falls off?
Her breasts, Miss Dietz.
- Shut up! - I'm sorry.
You are outta here, Homan.
Right.
Bye-bye.
Bye, girls.
So, do you share your partner's attitude?
No, I don't.
Eat shit.
Excuse me, Miss Dietz.
You've only got a couple of months left.
You're doing extremely well in your courses,
and I think your chances of getting a scholarship are excellent.
- I know this, Mr Donnelly. - Why are you in here now?
I don't know. I guess I just got a little fed up.
- With what? - The way that we get treated.
Look, you're getting a topnotch education here
and I just don't want to see you throw it away.
I'm getting a better education than I deserve.
I'm lucky, the good people of this community allow me to attend here.
- Again, you are misunderstanding me. - No, I understand everything.
I don't need to have it explained to me. I live it.
It's just, sometimes, I get a little upset and I lose my temper.
I don't like to see my friends getting punished for defending themselves.
Well, we'll just forget about this whole thing, OK?
OK.
What about Jena?
- She's off too. - Thank you.
Andie,
if you put out signals that you don't wanna belong,
people are gonna make sure that you don't.
That's a beautiful theory.
Andie! Andie!
I heard what happened and I came as best I could. I cut out of Home Ec.
- Was it really bad? - No, it was nothing.
- Are you upset? - No.
Yes, yes, you are, I can tell. Your eyes get all squinty.
- I know how to make you feel better. - I feel fine!
I wanna take you away this weekend. Do you fish?
- OK, we can go right now. - I have class!
- Tonight. I won't take no for an answer. - Try, please.
This woman is suffering inside. That's all there is to it.
Yo, man. Next time, I'll kick your ass. That'll be that.
I'm just kidding. It's a joke.
How about that stock market?
My broker is EF Hutton, and EF Hutton says...
You see, it never works. I've never seen it work.
Shit!
So this is what it looks like!
This is great! Wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait.
You got doors on the stalls. They're not stuck.
Wait a minute! We don't have none of this stuff in the boys' room!
We don't have doors on the stalls...
What is this? We don't have a candy machine.
- None of that. - Who is that screaming?
I'm sorry. I want the Principal here this instant. Now.
This instant. I'll wait. Thank you.
Shit! Why can't I do this?
What have you done? This... You have to subtotal first.
I tell you this every time. You never listen.
One more tune, then it's off to enjoy a terrible relationship.
The guy next door loves this.
Evening, young ladies. This is a very good tune.
My mother used to sing this. I love Otis.
We're closed.
- Know what older women do for me? - Change your diapers?
Touché. You're a very smoky alternative,
but this is the Duck Man's love in life.
- Shall we? - Ever had one of these?
I don't think so.
Come on! Let's plough!
Do I offend?
Andie, hon!
Listen. It's after seven. Don't waste good lip gloss.
- I know, lona. - I don't mean to be a bitch or anything,
but I don't think Mr Wonderful's gonna happen tonight.
I don't know what I'm doing.
Wishful make-upping.
Wait. You babes are talking a sign language
that the old Ducker here just does not understand.
Would you mind filling me in? I'm a little confused.
She got stood up, twerp!
Stood up? How so? Wait, I'm here!
Is this one of those feminine mystique deals or something?
He showed.
Andie.
I'll get that.
- Duckie, I'm really sorry. - Is this...
You're gonna go out with this guy? Is this, like, a date?
Yeah. I mean, you'd like him.
He's not like the other guys. Seriously.
No. No way. Andie!
You've really pissed me off cos they shit all over everybody, including you.
- I can't believe you'd be this stupid. - I'm not gonna let anybody shit on me.
He's gonna use your ass and throw you away. God, I would have died for you!
So what am I supposed to do? He asked me out and I like him.
If I hate him because he's got money,
that's the same thing as them hating us because we don't. Understand?
You can't do this and respect yourself.
- You can't. - I'll make that decision, all right?
Sure, you can do what you want!
You're saying that just because I'm going out with Blane.
Blane? His name is Blane?
That's a major appliance! That's not a name!
Just because I'm going out with Blane doesn't mean I can't be your friend.
- It doesn't change how I feel about you. - That's very nice.
I'm glad. Here's the point, Andie.
I'm not particularly concerned with whether or not you like me.
Cos I live to like you, and I can't like you any more.
So when you get your heart splattered all over hell and you feel low, and dirty,
don't look to me to help pump you back up cos...
cos maybe for the first time in your life, I won't be there.
I can't believe you're actually saying this.
Well, I guess that's just tough shit.
- Sorry. - Sorry.
- That guy in the store... - He was a friend of mine.
I've known him since I was a kid. He's a really nice guy.
- Yeah? - Yeah, I like him a lot.
So, you wanna go home and change?
I already did.
- Sorry. - That's OK.
So, where are we going?
You up for a party?
Yeah? No? Maybe?
No, I don't think so.
- Why? - Why?
- They're my friends. It's OK. - Your friends.
I wouldn't go if I didn't think they'd accept you.
Can't we go somewhere else?
Andie, I like you. I think you like me.
We know a lot of bullshit goes on, but if you're above it, I am.
If we want to make anything out of this, we gotta deal with it, right?
- Yeah. - Come on, I got as much to lose as you.
We can go out with your friends if you want. We could go crawl under a rock.
Anything you want. The choice is yours.
- We could go hang-gliding. - I've never been hang-gliding.
Well, there's a first for everything.
If it's a bad time, we leave.
- Hi, Blane. - Hey, Eddie.
Aren't you the girl in my art class?
Nice pearls. This isn't a dinner party, honey.
Watch it.
- Hey, Blane. How you doin'? - Hey, Kev, what's up?
I can't believe I actually associate with these people.
I can't believe that I'm actually here.
- Pretty bad, yeah? - Yeah, it's pretty bad.
I'm sorry.
Let's go upstairs, huh?
Come on.
I didn't come here to get you off. That was not my idea.
That's not what I meant. I haven't even tried to kiss you, have I?
Look, it's quieter up there, OK?
Come on. These hands will remain in these pockets, I swear to God.
Look at me here. Come on. I'm utterly defenceless.
And utterly foolish. Come on.
- What do you think of these carpets? - They're fab.
This is gonna be great.
- Hey, Blane. - Steff.
- How you doin'? - All right.
- I'll get another room. - No, come on in.
I'm just watching some 'toons here.
Who you got with you here, Blane?
Andie, this is Steff. Steff, Andie.
It's very nice to meet you, Andie.
Listen, you wanna come sit down? Or you want the bed?
No! No, we're fine.
Come and have a drink. Can I get you something?
This is my last serious party of my high school career.
Hope you guys are gonna tough it out until Sunday when my folks get home.
I think this one may just finally kill the old son of a bitch, Blane.
Another giant step away from virginity.
You're a slut, aren't you, Benny?
Oh, my God.
- Am I having a nightmare? - We got guests.
I know you. You're in my calculus class.
- Gym. - Your name's Jim?
You are worthless, aren't you?
You and your friends gave me a lot of shit the other day.
- Take it easy, Benny, huh? - This is Steff s party, Blane.
- Don't tell me what to do. - Steff...
You shouldn't be allowed to invite just anybody.
Steff, she's gonna ruin my night.
- Shut up, Benny. - You're a faggot, Blane.
OK, listen, Benny.
- Listen, why don't we just... - Where are you going?
- Let's just leave them with the room... - Why?
- ...and we will get you something to eat. - You've got what I want.
...ribs or something.
Listen, you guys enjoy yourselves and we'll see you later, maybe.
I doubt it.
- You all right? - Fine.
You're an asshole. And I don't wanna know what you are.
I'm gonna take her to throw up somewhere. Enjoy yourself, Blane.
They're kinda jerks when they drink, huh? Bad idea.
Can you just get me out of here now?
Yeah.
I don't wanna take you home. I'd like to be with you.
If not here, somewhere else. Anywhere you want.
I'm sorry. What can I say? I made a mistake.
I overestimated my friends. I'm sorry.
- What, do you wanna hit me? - Yes, I do.
Be my guest.
You wanna know my thing?
If I really have it solid for a girl,
I'll ride by her house on my bike.
I'll do it, like, a hundred times in a day.
It's really... it's intense.
Do you ever park?
I'm kind of a drive-by kind of guy.
Do you want a drink?
- Yeah! - Yeah?
- Coke. - Coke? OK.
Give me your address. I'll put you on my round.
OK, you're gonna have to help me out here.
You know, some day that girl's gonna realise just what she missed.
Come on, don't stop! Gimme more!
- Hi! - Hi.
- Prince Charming wimp out? - No. No, he's at the bar.
Duckie.
He's sulking.
He's not gonna ride his bike past your house any more.
Duckie, you're being a real jerk.
How'd he get in here, anyway?
- I said he was my kid. - How come you're here?
I've been trying to figure that out all night.
- Sorry. - Mom make this for you?
Yeah. Gross, huh?
Excuse me.
- Hi. - There you go.
- You met lona, didn't you? - Not formally. Hi. Blane.
And that's Duckie Dale over there behind the glasses.
- Hi, Duckie. - Phillip F Dale to you, scumwad.
So where have you guys been?
- A friend of mine was having a party. - How adorable!
- Yeah. It was a little intense. - You had an intense party?
- No, it was a friend of mine's, I said. - Duckie, shut up.
- What's the problem? - This is a classic piece of work here.
- Duckie, please! - Phil.
Phil, I think you're making Andie uncomfortable. Just knock it off.
I devoted my life to the girl and he comes along and thinks he knows her.
You should call David Letterman. He'd book you in a minute.
Phil, would you like us to leave?
Yes, very perceptive.
Come on.
Look at the manners on this guy! This was a treat!
You're a great couple of kids, really.
I can't believe I actually felt bad for you tonight, retarded little dwarf!
See you.
Nice meeting you. See ya later.
- Sorry. - No problem.
- Asshole.
Blow me, buttwad. From you, I'd take it as a compliment.
Andie! Yo!
You've been replaced.
I'm sorry.
Well, what now?
I gotta get up early. Why don't we just forget it?
What, home?
- Hey, you wanna go to my house? - No, thanks.
- You wanna eat? - No.
What do you wanna do? Anything.
Why don't you just drop me off at Trax...
- Trax? - It's real close to home.
- It's late. I'll just drop you home. - I have something I have to do there.
Now? It's late. You wanna go home, I'll drop you home.
- I don't want you to take me home. - OK, let's go out. Anything you want.
- I don't wanna go out. - And you don't wanna go home.
- What do you wanna do? - I don't want you to take me home.
I'm missing something. I don't understand...
- Wait a minute. Don't walk away. - Don't! I just don't want...
- Don't you understand? - No, I don't.
Listen to me. I don't want you to take me home.
OK. Why? What is the problem?
Because I don't want you to see where I live, OK?
- What? - I'm sorry. Forget it.
Jesus Christ.
I'm sorry for bumming out the night for you.
You didn't bum out anything. I had a great time.
- You liar. - I was with you. I had a great time.
If I was in a Turkish prison, I'd have a great time with you.
I don't know. It's just too weird for me. Maybe this shouldn't happen.
What - you and me?
Well, maybe it doesn't happen all the time, but it doesn't mean it isn't right.
Doesn't mean we can't try.
Feel any better if I asked you to the prom?
I know the prom's kinda lame, so if you don't wanna go, it's no big deal...
Hey! What?
It happened. He asked me.
- And? - I accepted.
Well, congratulations.
No more moping around the house waiting for the telephone to ring.
So, are you in love?
- Yeah, I think I am. - Well, who is this guy?
His name's Blane, and he's a senior. He's so beautiful.
He's a richie.
- A what-ie? - A richie. It's kinda stupid.
It's just his family has a lot of money.
- Well, is that a problem? - I don't know, it's just weird.
His friends have a lot of money and he has a lot of money.
He drives a BMW.
I just... I don't know... I'm not really sure if they're gonna accept me.
What does that mean? You like him, he likes you.
What his friends think shouldn't make a difference.
Yeah, but it's my friends too. It's everybody.
I'm just not real secure about it.
Well, so take the heat.
You like him, he likes you. It's worth it.
- Is it? - Well, isn't it?
You're right.
- I'm just overreacting, aren't I? - Not necessarily.
I mean, a good kiss can scramble anybody's brain.
Look, just don't worry about it. Wait and see how you feel tomorrow.
- Good night. - Good night. Thanks.
That's my baby.
Honey?
Wait a minute. Could I ask you something?
Yeah.
Sometimes I feel a little sorry
that I'm the one you have to talk to about these things.
I'm not. She couldn't have said it any better than you.
- I mean it. - Good night.
OK, make my day.
I want all the gory details.
The mingling breath, the pounding heart, the steamy windows.
I want the whole scoop.
I hate to disappoint you, but nothing happened.
Nothing?
Well, not nothing. I mean, I kissed him.
- Anywhere interesting? - Please!
So...
does he have strong lips?
- How can you tell? - Did you feel it in your knees?
- I felt it everywhere. - Strong lips.
Talk about lips!
I'm old enough to be his mother, but when the Duck laid that kiss on me,
I swear to God, my thighs just went up in flames.
He must practise on melons or something.
Is this your prom dress?
- Believe it or not. - It's great.
- It's silly. - It's a great material.
You know, I'm going.
To the prom.
- Stop it! - No, I am.
Last night he asked me, and, I don't know, I said yes.
It seems really weird.
But it might be kinda fun.
You were here for 15 minutes and you didn't even tell me!
I really, really wanted to go.
You lucky girl.
Isn't that a dreamy dress?
- lona, I have to go. - Will you hold me till this song's over?
But I have to leave.
Why can't we start old and get younger?
I envy you. I really envy you!
Iona, you're gonna OD on nostalgia.
I love The Big Chill.
- I love this dress. - It's a great dress.
Yeah.
My mother bought it for me. God, she was so happy.
It was the first and last time I ever looked normal.
I mean, relatively speaking.
Would have been a fairy tale if my date hadn't been the only one there with a...
wife and two kids.
You wanna try it on? I bet it'd look great on you!
I mean, your butt is 15 years younger than mine.
I used to have a great butt. I did, I loved my butt! I wish I had photographs of it.
- You wanna try this on? - No, not right now.
Oh, yeah, you gotta go. I know, I know. I gotta get ready myself.
- You going out? - Yeah. New guy.
Terrence. Owns a pet shop.
We'll see what happens.
- Give Mr Perfecto a squeeze for me. - I will.
Listen.
If you see your little Duck Man, be kind.
He's nursin' some fairly serious wounds.
- OK? - OK.
- Bye-bye. - Bye.
You know, we're goin' for sushi.
Do you think this is too much?
Bye.
I thought that was very uncool of you last night.
- What? - "What"!
- You mean Andie? - Yeah, I mean Andie.
What's the big deal? I like her.
Matter of fact, I was pissed off that you guys were so nasty to her.
It was way out of order for you to foist her on the party.
Steff, you hear yourself? You hear the same asshole shit I hear?
- Do I have to spell it out for you, Blane? - I guess so.
Nobody appreciates your sense of humour.
In fact, everybody's just about to puke from it.
If you got a hard-on for trash, don't take care of it around us, pal, all right?
Right, buddy.
Listen, I don't need a lot of shit on this one, Blane. I really don't.
- Money all that matters to you? - Where the hell does that come from?
Look around. Would I treat my parents' house like this if money was an issue?
Why are you doing this? Why don't you just nail her and get it over with?
- Why get involved? - Is there something wrong with that?
I just think it's stupid. It's pointless.
- Your parents, I think, will be thrilled! - They have nothing to do with it.
I've seen your mother go to work on you, Blane. It's vicious.
When Bill and Joyce finish with you,
you won't know whether to shit or go sailing.
Listen, I'm getting really bored with this conversation, Blane.
If you want your little piece of low-grade ass, fine, take it.
But if you do, you're not gonna have a friend.
- Is that right? - Yeah, that's right.
If you wanna make the choice, go ahead.
I personally wouldn't trash a friendship over it, but I'm old-fashioned, so...
Why don't you take a shower? You look like shit.
If two weeks ago somebody told me I'd go out with you,
I never would have believed them.
- Why? I'm not all that bad. - No. But...
What about me and you?
It's insane that somebody you've never met or talked to can be your enemy.
Yep.
You shouldn't meet my parents, then.
OK.
Well, I mean, they're not ogres, but...
I think they still believe in arranged marriages.
Corporate families replace royal families.
I'm the crown prince of McDonough Electric.
- It's irrelevant. - No.
Yeah.
- I could tell 'em all to go to hell. - Tell 'em to go to hell.
- Everyone. Friends, parents. - All of 'em.
What about you?
If somebody doesn't believe in me, I can't believe in them.
You don't lie, do you?
I don't have to lie.
This is gonna happen.
OK, I really want this to happen.
Yeah.
- Can I help you? - I'm fine, thank you.
- Something for the prom? - Just looking.
Yeah. Well, if you need anything...
- This is trash! - It's very becoming!
Mother! It looks like I should be standing on top of a wedding cake!
Darling, don't I wish!
I hate this material, and, by the way, I cannot stand baby blue.
- Do you know where he is? - I'm sorry, he didn't tell me.
OK. If he calls or comes home, can you tell him to call me?
- Who is this? - Andie.
- Who? - Andie.
- Yes, could I have your number? - He has it.
- Fine. I'll leave him a note, dear. - OK, thanks. Bye.
Where the hell is he?
Don't fall in love. You just won't like it.
It's very complicated.
Andie!
- Andie! - Come in!
- Hi. - Hi, Daddy.
I brought you something.
- What is it? - A little something I picked up for you.
It's a little busy, but I know you can make something out of it if you need to.
- Do you like it? - It's a beautiful colour. It's really pretty.
God, it reminds me so much of your mom.
She always wore pink. And she looked so beautiful in it.
- It's OK. Thank you. - OK.
- Daddy? - What?
I want you to know I really appreciate this.
I think I can make something out of it.
- Can I ask you something? - Sure. What?
Where'd you get the money to pay for this?
It wasn't that much. I had some money.
- From your new job? - Yeah. From my new job.
I came home before work on Wednesday and your car was here.
- You didn't have to lie to me. - Yes, I did.
- No, you didn't! - I did. I missed the appointment.
- Why'd you miss it? - It slipped my mind.
It didn't! You didn't want the job.
You saw the counsellor because they forced you to.
- What's your point, Andie? - My point is you just didn't go.
- I deliberately missed the appointment? - Yes.
Is this how you feel about me?
Yes.
- Well, I didn't know this. - Well, now you do.
You know everything now, huh? You're 18 and you got a scholarship...
- That's not fair. - I'm ignorant, never gave you anything.
- I never asked for anything! - That's brilliant.
Why can't you just forget her?
- It's late. You got school. - No! Don't walk out.
- Will you please listen to me? - I've already been through this.
Sure! You go through it every day.
Why can't you just realise that she's gone and she's not gonna come back?
- She's never coming back! - Shut up!
Why can't you accept it? She's just gone! She...
Why can't you accept it?
Because...
I love her, that's why.
Well, I loved her, too, you know.
She just didn't love us back.
OK, she tried. I don't know, she just couldn't handle it.
Yeah, but I knew it. I knew it all along.
When I was five, I felt it.
Remember when she didn't come home that time?
I knew it then. I knew why. I was 14 and I knew it.
You were 50 and you didn't.
You know, you can't go on living every day in the past.
She left us. We didn't leave her. There was nothing we could do about it.
Since when is a daughter supposed to know more than her father?
I've just been a blind fool.
And you're a blind fool that needs a shave, too.
And I need a shave.
Well...
You better get to bed. You got school.
And I gotta hit the hay too, cos I got a few things I gotta do tomorrow.
OK.
I would have got you some shoes, but I didn't know your size.
Hey, Mary.
- How you doin'? - Why haven't you called me?
I got nailed for the stable thing. The groom saw us. It's against club rules.
I called you three times and I left messages.
Yeah? Well, I didn't get 'em.
My family, they're irresponsible about that stuff.
I waited for you this morning.
- Yeah? Where? - Parking lot.
I saw you, and I thought that you saw me.
No.
What about prom, Blane?
I'm having a bad day. Can we talk later?
- No. What about prom? - Why don't we meet after school?
- No! What about prom? - Andie, come on.
- Just say it. - What?
I wanna hear you say it.
- Andie, please. All right? - I wanna hear you say it.
A month ago, I asked somebody else and I forgot.
You're a liar! You're a filthy fucking no-good liar!
You didn't have the guts to tell me the truth.
- Just say it! - I'm not lying.
- Tell me! - What do you wanna hear? What?
- You're ashamed to be seen... - No, I am not. I am not.
You're afraid! You're terrified that your goddamn rich friends won't approve!
Just say it! Just tell me the truth!
You don't understand that it has nothing at all to do with you.
Andie!
Forget about it. It's not worth getting upset over.
- Why don't you take off? - Any girl that did that to me,
I would not be too jazzed to hold on to, Blane.
It's not worth it. I told you it wasn't gonna work.
The girl was, is, and will always be, nada.
You got a problem, friend?
All right, all right.
Thanks, huh?
- Andie? - Yeah.
- You're Andie, aren't you? - Yeah, I am.
- How do you know me? - Well, lona told me. I'm Terrence.
- Pet shop. Right? - Yeah, among other things.
She's in the bedroom getting ready. You might wanna go and tell her we're late.
OK.
Iona?
Nice to meet you.
- lona? - Hi, honey! I'm in here.
- Laugh and I'll deck ya. - What happened?
Either it's all those drugs I took in the '60s,
or I am really in love.
What do you think? Honestly?
Honestly I think you look great.
- I look like a mother. - No. Well, yeah, a little, but that's OK.
You look happy.
I am.
It's weird but... Did you meet him?
- Yeah. - Yeah.
He's a yuppie, but he's so nice.
He's employed. He's heterosexual.
I'm so far ahead of the game, next time you see me,
I'll probably be picking out my china patterns.
Are you all right? No, you're not.
- It's what happened with your mom? - No, that's not it.
Boy trouble?
- The worst? - Way beyond.
He packed out on me.
He said he asked somebody else and he forgot about it.
I can't believe it. I can't believe it.
I'm so humiliated.
I could have killed him, I swear.
- You know, I just walked right into it. - No, no.
Love is awful, isn't it?
It's OK.
You remember you said that if I wanted your prom dress, I could have it?
Well, I need it. I want it.
- What for? - I just need it.
OK.
It's yours.
Oh, my God. Look at you.
Another first. Your guy is gonna fall to the floor when he comes in.
- No, he won't. - The hell he's not!
No, he really won't. He's not coming.
- What? - It's OK.
- I'm gonna go. - Alone?
Yeah, I'm not sad about it. I'm not hurt.
I mean, I am hurt a little bit.
But I know if I don't do it, I'll feel a lot worse.
I'm just gonna go in, walk in, walk out and come home.
You sure?
I just wanna let them know that they didn't break me.
Open up.
When anybody's ready to go upstairs and get serious, just let me know.
We've only been here an hour.
We can go up and come back down again, all right?
Did you look at the suite?
It's 300 bucks a night, Benny. It's not gonna be a palace, OK?
We should stay for a while. We won't see these people for much longer.
Come on, stay to the end, OK?
I don't give a shit what you do.
Damn.
- You're here! What happened? - Well, I guess you're looking at it.
You look great.
Thanks. You look stunning. Really. It's breathtaking.
Listen, I want you to know, despite my appearance at this function,
I remain now, and will always be,
a Duck Man.
I admire you.
If you wish.
Let's plough.
Shall we dance?
Wouldn't be unheard of.
A little lingering doubt, perhaps, Blane?
You know, you gotta give her credit. After you dumped her,
she went out and found herself probably the most interesting date...
Steff.
You buy everything. You couldn't buy her, that's what's killing you.
- I don't wanna listen... - Steff.
That's it, Steff.
She thinks you're shit.
And deep down, you know she's right.
- Hi. - Hi.
You don't need me to say I'm sorry.
It's done. It's over with. I'm fine.
Well, if that's true, then I'm glad.
It's not true. But it doesn't matter, does it?
You told me you couldn't believe in somebody who didn't believe in you.
I always believed in you.
I just didn't believe in me.
I love you.
Always.
Andie.
He came here alone.
OK, you're right. He's not like the others.
If you don't go to him now, I'm never gonna take you to another prom again!
This is an incredibly romantic moment, and you're ruining it for me.
Thanks, Duckie.
Go ahead.
Blane!
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