1
00:00:21,989 --> 00:00:24,651
Will you please turn your shirt off?
2
00:00:25,058 --> 00:00:27,356
What? I'm giving myself
dramatic entrance music.
3
00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:31,089
People will know I'm awesome
and to be feared.
4
00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:33,859
Right. There's nothing more awesome
and frightening...
5
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:37,993
than a man who's got music blasting
from between his nipples.
6
00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:42,274
Hey, Stuart. What's going on?
Well, you might wanna mark...
7
00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:46,401
your Google calendars. Stan Lee
is coming to do a signing on Thursday.
8
00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:49,105
Did he finally write a sequel
to his autobiography?
9
00:00:49,283 --> 00:00:53,083
I'm sure ages 79 through 87
were just action-packed.
10
00:00:53,253 --> 00:00:55,619
No, just a regular comic signing.
11
00:00:55,789 --> 00:00:59,384
My uncle is his dermatologist,
and Stan's doing him a favor.
12
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,551
Oh, I don't wanna know that.
13
00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:05,186
How can I possibly discuss with
Stan Lee the scientific foundations...
14
00:01:05,365 --> 00:01:08,528
for interstellar flight on a silver surfboard
when part of my brain...
15
00:01:08,702 --> 00:01:12,729
will be scanning his face
for signs of contagious skin disease?
16
00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:16,638
Stan Lee does not have
a contagious skin disease.
17
00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:20,143
Well, look who thinks
he's Stuart's uncle now.
18
00:01:20,814 --> 00:01:24,306
Can't believe it.
We're gonna meet Stan Lee.
19
00:01:24,787 --> 00:01:28,878
♪ I'm so excited
And I just can't hide it ♪
20
00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:33,224
♪ I'm about to lose control
And I think I like it ♪
21
00:01:33,393 --> 00:01:35,827
I'm sad to say
I taught him those moves.
22
00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:41,594
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
23
00:01:41,605 --> 00:01:44,924
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
24
00:01:44,925 --> 00:01:46,474
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
25
00:01:46,475 --> 00:01:49,094
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
26
00:01:49,095 --> 00:01:51,614
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
27
00:01:51,650 --> 00:01:54,289
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
28
00:01:54,290 --> 00:01:56,189
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
29
00:01:56,190 --> 00:01:58,140
♪ Bang! ♪
30
00:02:04,524 --> 00:02:07,118
I can't decide whether I want Stan Lee
to autograph...
31
00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:10,161
my Journey Into Mystery 83,
first appearance of Thor...
32
00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:14,596
or my Fantastic Four, number 5,
first appearance of Dr. Doom.
33
00:02:24,211 --> 00:02:28,011
Alex, I'm gonna go with:
"What is you're a dumb-ass?"
34
00:02:34,187 --> 00:02:38,556
I've decided I'm going to have Mr. Lee
sign my copy of this month's Batman.
35
00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:41,827
That's crazy. Stan Lee
had nothing to do with Batman.
36
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,361
Which is why no one else
will ask him to sign one.
37
00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:47,523
I'll be the possessor of a unique,
albeit confusing artifact...
38
00:02:47,701 --> 00:02:51,535
which will set me apart from
the hoi polloi of comic-book fandom.
39
00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:56,405
That's a great idea. I'm gonna get him
to sign a Batman as well.
40
00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:01,404
What is it about the word "unique"
you don't understand?
41
00:03:01,581 --> 00:03:04,516
Ow! Damn. Paper cut.
Nothing worse than a paper cut.
42
00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:08,553
Well, obviously,
you don't remember your circumcision.
43
00:03:10,223 --> 00:03:13,249
There's Neosporin and Band-Aids
in my top desk drawer.
44
00:03:13,427 --> 00:03:15,759
Why don't you keep that stuff
in the bathroom?
45
00:03:15,929 --> 00:03:19,524
He does. And in the kitchen,
and in the car, and in his pocket.
46
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,759
Yeah, but the ones in my pocket
are mine.
47
00:03:23,437 --> 00:03:25,234
Hi.
Hey.
48
00:03:25,405 --> 00:03:27,566
Guess who's gonna be
at the comic store on Thursday.
49
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:30,733
Um, can you give me a hint?
Stan Lee.
50
00:03:30,911 --> 00:03:35,041
Um, Stanley. Stanley. Stanley Tucci?
51
00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:38,878
No, ha, ha. No. Stan Lee.
52
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:42,749
Oh. Oh, Stan Lee. Cool.
53
00:03:45,525 --> 00:03:47,186
You have no idea who he is, do you?
54
00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:50,090
Of course I do.
You're an important part of my life...
55
00:03:50,263 --> 00:03:53,460
and I pay attention to the things
you are interested in.
56
00:03:53,633 --> 00:03:55,965
Good. Good.
Heh, heh.
57
00:03:56,136 --> 00:03:57,228
So who's Stan Lee?
58
00:03:58,138 --> 00:04:00,470
Um, he was on Star Trek.
59
00:04:04,711 --> 00:04:05,769
No.
Star Wars?
60
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:07,140
No.
61
00:04:07,881 --> 00:04:12,614
Um, Stan Lee. Oh, he was in those goofy
kung fu movies you love so much?
62
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,920
That's Bruce Lee.
63
00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:16,380
Oh.
64
00:04:16,556 --> 00:04:19,116
So is this Bruce Lee's
nerdy brother, Stan?
65
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:24,653
Sheldon, why do you have all these
unopened paychecks in your desk?
66
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:29,291
Because most of the things I'm planning
to buy haven't been invented yet.
67
00:04:29,803 --> 00:04:31,998
There must be thousands
of dollars here.
68
00:04:32,172 --> 00:04:34,970
Why don't you put it in the bank?
I don't trust banks.
69
00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:39,602
I believe that when the robots rise up,
ATMs will lead the charge.
70
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:44,314
You've also got something
from the Pasadena Municipal Court.
71
00:04:44,651 --> 00:04:48,018
Undoubtedly yet another snide response
to my repeated letters...
72
00:04:48,188 --> 00:04:52,022
complaining that the flags in front of
the courthouse are in the wrong order.
73
00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:56,026
It's supposed to be federal, state,
and then city of Pasadena.
74
00:04:56,463 --> 00:05:00,160
I'm sorry, you sent more than one letter
about that?
75
00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:02,662
It bothers me.
76
00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:07,362
Sheldon, this is a summons.
A summons? For what?
77
00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:09,270
Looks like you ran a red light...
78
00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:14,345
on Marengo Avenue at 9:30 p.m.
on November 16th.
79
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:18,206
They got you on a traffic camera.
Nice picture.
80
00:05:22,722 --> 00:05:26,556
November 16th? Penny, that's
the evening you fell in your bathtub.
81
00:05:26,726 --> 00:05:28,819
I had to drive you
to the emergency room.
82
00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,189
No, it isn't.
83
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:33,532
Yes, it is.
No, it isn't.
84
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:37,227
I have an eidetic memory. Also, that's
a picture of you in the passenger seat...
85
00:05:37,404 --> 00:05:39,838
holding your dislocated shoulder.
86
00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:41,200
Hmm. No, it isn't.
87
00:05:42,809 --> 00:05:46,040
Okay, then why is a summons
for a traffic violation...
88
00:05:46,213 --> 00:05:50,479
committed in your car, bearing
your license plates, coming to me?
89
00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:57,251
Okay, look, they sent me the ticket.
90
00:05:57,424 --> 00:06:01,087
I told them I wasn't driving,
and they were all, "Well, if it wasn't you, who was it?"
91
00:06:01,261 --> 00:06:03,252
So you betrayed me.
No.
92
00:06:03,430 --> 00:06:04,556
It wasn't a betrayal.
93
00:06:04,731 --> 00:06:07,723
It was more of a, I can't afford
any more points on my license.
94
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:11,564
I already have to buy my insurance
from this place in the Cayman Islands.
95
00:06:11,738 --> 00:06:13,899
But the only reason
I was driving your car...
96
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:17,043
was because you were in distress,
and I was rescuing you.
97
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:20,907
Yes. And look, now you have a photo
to remember that heroic day.
98
00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:23,939
It's not that big a deal.
99
00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:27,450
You just go down to the court on Thursday,
and you pay the fine.
100
00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:30,715
I'm not going to pay a fine.
That would imply I'm guilty.
101
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:32,256
You are guilty.
102
00:06:38,698 --> 00:06:41,132
That one I liked.
Yeah.
103
00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:44,133
I am not guilty.
I only have a learner's permit.
104
00:06:44,304 --> 00:06:46,772
Penny was the teacher.
When the light turned yellow...
105
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:49,875
she said, "Go, go, go,"
so I went, went, went.
106
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:53,375
Sheldon, I'm sorry. I'll be happy
to reimburse you for the fine.
107
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:57,277
You know, as soon as I get a part
in a movie or my own TV series.
108
00:06:57,450 --> 00:06:59,645
You don't need to reimburse me.
Because I'm not paying.
109
00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:03,778
On Thursday, I will have my day in court,
and justice will be done.
110
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:07,393
In fact, I'm going to begin
preparing my defense right now.
111
00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:11,094
Okay, he's going to jail.
112
00:07:11,898 --> 00:07:15,129
Oh, that's right.
Thursday's Stan Lee day.
113
00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:19,137
Now you see what you've done?
114
00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:23,598
Because of you,
we're all going to miss Stan Lee.
115
00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:25,804
Whoa!
116
00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:29,978
What do you mean "all"?
Well, you're my friends.
117
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:32,641
You'll be standing by my side,
supporting me...
118
00:07:32,819 --> 00:07:35,845
feeding me legal precedents,
and, if you have the strength...
119
00:07:36,022 --> 00:07:39,185
carrying me out on your shoulders
when I'm victorious.
120
00:07:40,026 --> 00:07:42,620
Yeah, okay, no.
121
00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:46,163
Are you saying that you will not stand
beside me as I plead my case?
122
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:48,160
That's what I'm saying.
123
00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:50,499
Howard?
Wow. Ahem.
124
00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:54,197
Uh, Stan Lee or you in court.
125
00:07:54,374 --> 00:07:58,435
Uh, if this was Sophie's Choice,
it would've been a much shorter movie. No.
126
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:00,979
Raj, you'll be there, won't you?
127
00:08:05,385 --> 00:08:08,548
All right, then,
my so-called friends have forsaken me.
128
00:08:08,722 --> 00:08:12,055
So I guess it'll just be me
and my eyewitness.
129
00:08:12,559 --> 00:08:14,789
Oh, balls.
130
00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:18,397
Try to wear something appropriate.
It won't help my case if the judge...
131
00:08:18,565 --> 00:08:22,365
is busy trying to read the word "Juicy"
scrawled across your buttocks.
132
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:30,903
Penny. Penny.
133
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:32,874
Penny.
134
00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:38,039
That's just wrong.
All right, let's go.
135
00:08:38,218 --> 00:08:40,550
Wait. Hold on.
Before we get to the courthouse...
136
00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:43,746
I'd like to call on your skills
as an actress.
137
00:08:43,923 --> 00:08:45,049
What is this?
138
00:08:45,225 --> 00:08:48,752
I've taken the liberty of scripting
your appearance on the witness stand.
139
00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:50,589
You're somewhat of a loose cannon.
140
00:08:51,097 --> 00:08:54,533
Don't worry, it's written
in your vernacular. So shall we rehearse?
141
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:57,261
Do I have a choice?
Of course you have a choice.
142
00:08:57,437 --> 00:09:01,498
Although we live in a deterministic
universe, each individual has free will.
143
00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:03,403
Now, sit down.
144
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:07,936
"I call your attention
to the events of November 16th.
145
00:09:08,114 --> 00:09:09,581
Do you remember that date?"
146
00:09:10,283 --> 00:09:13,081
"Darn tooting, I do.
147
00:09:14,587 --> 00:09:19,581
If the court will excuse my homespun,
corn-fed, Nebraskan turn of phrase."
148
00:09:20,860 --> 00:09:24,125
Excellent. Go on.
"The reason that date is, like...
149
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:28,427
so totally fixed in my memory is that
I had the privilege to be witness...
150
00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:33,129
to one of the most heroic acts
I've ever seen in, like, ever."
151
00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:37,300
"And who performed that heroic act?"
152
00:09:37,477 --> 00:09:41,311
"Why, you did, sir.
You, Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
153
00:09:41,481 --> 00:09:45,315
And may I add,
it is a privilege to know you."
154
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:49,585
"T here's no need for compliments. This
court is only interested in the facts."
155
00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:53,817
"But it is a fact
that it's a privilege to know you.
156
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:56,128
Totally."
157
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:59,894
"A teardrop rolls down my cheek"?
158
00:10:00,667 --> 00:10:04,125
Only a suggestion. A catch in your throat
would work just as well.
159
00:10:06,506 --> 00:10:10,840
"But it is a fact
that it's a privilege to know you.
160
00:10:11,678 --> 00:10:13,669
Totally."
161
00:10:16,516 --> 00:10:19,110
Maybe you should put on
your Juicy pants again.
162
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:23,286
Pay the cashier.
163
00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:26,018
Sheldon Cooper.
164
00:10:28,862 --> 00:10:30,352
Good morning, Your Honor.
165
00:10:30,530 --> 00:10:35,866
Dr. Sheldon Cooper appearing in pro se.
That is to say, representing himself.
166
00:10:36,035 --> 00:10:38,663
I know what it means.
I went to law school.
167
00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:42,330
And yet you wound up in traffic court.
168
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:47,135
Anyway, if it would please the court, I'd like
to begin with an opening statement.
169
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,304
The court would advise you
to make it quick.
170
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:53,976
The court had a dicey-looking
breakfast burrito this morning and just took an Imodium.
171
00:10:55,221 --> 00:10:58,679
Very well. A quick opening statement.
172
00:10:58,858 --> 00:11:03,022
Like a milking stool,
my case rests on three legs.
173
00:11:03,196 --> 00:11:06,632
I will demonstrate that
I was improperly instructed in driving...
174
00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:10,530
by a woman whose lack of respect
for society borders on the sociopathic.
175
00:11:11,738 --> 00:11:14,639
I will argue that the emergency
met the legal doctrine...
176
00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:19,210
of quod est necessarium est licitum,
that which is necessary is legal.
177
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:22,542
But first,
I will raise a Sixth Amendment issue.
178
00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:27,982
I am unable to confront my accuser,
a non-human entity, to wit, a camera.
179
00:11:28,154 --> 00:11:30,418
So to sum up, improper instruction...
180
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:33,252
quod est necessarium est licitum,
Sixth Amendment.
181
00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:35,724
My milk stool is complete.
182
00:11:35,895 --> 00:11:37,590
Impressive.
Thank you.
183
00:11:37,764 --> 00:11:40,756
Guilty. Pay the cashier.
184
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:43,732
I object.
You're completely ignoring the law.
185
00:11:43,903 --> 00:11:47,236
No, I'm following the law.
I'm ignoring you.
186
00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:51,509
Really? I would point out that I am
at the top of my profession...
187
00:11:51,678 --> 00:11:54,738
while you preside
over the kiddie table of yours.
188
00:11:56,115 --> 00:11:59,448
Dr. Cooper, before I find you in contempt
and throw you in jail...
189
00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:02,952
I'm gonna give you a chance
to apologize for that last remark.
190
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:06,881
I'm a scientist.
I never apologize for the truth.
191
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:15,965
That's my spot.
192
00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:26,968
I can't wait to ask Stan Lee
why he insists on giving all his characters...
193
00:12:27,146 --> 00:12:30,138
first and last names
that start with the same letter.
194
00:12:30,316 --> 00:12:32,477
Oh, come on. Why would you do that?
195
00:12:32,652 --> 00:12:36,247
Bruce Banner, Reed Richards,
Sue Storm, Stephen Strange...
196
00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:38,890
Otto Octavius, Silver Surfer,
Peter Parker.
197
00:12:39,058 --> 00:12:44,394
Oh, and worst of all,
J. Jonah Jameson Jr.
198
00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:46,656
Okay, I'm cutting.
199
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:50,462
I'm not gonna talk to Stan Lee
after you cheese him off.
200
00:12:55,508 --> 00:12:57,669
Hey.
Sheldon's in jail.
201
00:12:57,844 --> 00:13:00,938
Sheldon's in jail?
You called it.
202
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:04,014
For what?
What do you think?
203
00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:07,516
For doing the same crap he always does,
except to a judge.
204
00:13:08,688 --> 00:13:12,351
He has to stay there until he apologizes.
So tell him to apologize.
205
00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:15,653
Oh, gee, thanks, Leonard.
That didn't occur to me.
206
00:13:16,095 --> 00:13:19,189
If he doesn't apologize by 5:00,
he's gonna spend the night in jail.
207
00:13:19,365 --> 00:13:23,495
Oh, no, that's terrible.
The line's moving. Gotta go. Bye.
208
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:36,544
Excuse me. Excuse me, jailor?
209
00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:40,713
What?
I need to use the restroom.
210
00:13:40,887 --> 00:13:42,377
Knock yourself out.
211
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:49,552
That's the toilet?
Well, it ain't a wishing well.
212
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:53,996
Please tell the judge
I'm ready to apologize.
213
00:13:57,036 --> 00:13:58,367
Look at that.
214
00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:04,636
"To my friend Leonard.
From Stan Lee. Excelsior!"
215
00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:06,244
Awesome. Mine says:
216
00:14:06,412 --> 00:14:11,748
"To my friend Howard.
From Stan Lee. Excelsior!"
217
00:14:12,185 --> 00:14:16,315
Mine says, "To Raj. From Stan Lee."
218
00:14:19,926 --> 00:14:23,362
That's because you pissed him off
about his character names.
219
00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:25,326
I didn't even mention
Dum Dum Dugan...
220
00:14:25,498 --> 00:14:29,195
or Green Goblin, Matt Murdock,
Pepper Potts, Victor Von Doom.
221
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:33,499
Oh, and worst of all, Millie the Model.
222
00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:35,765
We're home.
223
00:14:35,942 --> 00:14:39,605
Oh, hey, buddy. How'd it go?
You know very well how it went.
224
00:14:39,779 --> 00:14:42,612
Yeah. But we all wanna
hear it from you.
225
00:14:44,951 --> 00:14:49,945
I was found guilty and fined $533.
I'm gonna write you a check for that.
226
00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:54,184
As long as you promise to put it in your
drawer and never cash it like the others.
227
00:14:57,463 --> 00:15:01,957
I also now have three points on
a driver's license I do not yet possess...
228
00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:04,797
and I was forced to issue
an undeserved apology...
229
00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:09,374
because I refused to urinate in a
stainless-steel bowl in front of criminals.
230
00:15:10,109 --> 00:15:12,304
Plus, you didn't get to meet Stan Lee.
231
00:15:14,046 --> 00:15:17,038
Okay, that's enough, Howard.
The poor guy's had a tough time.
232
00:15:17,216 --> 00:15:20,982
He had to spend the entire afternoon
in jail wearing that suit.
233
00:15:23,790 --> 00:15:27,317
It would be cruel to mention that,
after he finished signing autographs...
234
00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:30,826
Stan Lee took Stuart and us out
for gelato.
235
00:15:32,331 --> 00:15:34,993
You had gelato with Stan Lee?
236
00:15:35,334 --> 00:15:38,303
He said we could call him Stan.
237
00:15:39,238 --> 00:15:40,330
Except for Raj.
238
00:15:45,011 --> 00:15:47,479
Well, I hope you're satisfied, Penny.
239
00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:52,346
You are responsible for all the evil
that has befallen me today.
240
00:15:52,518 --> 00:15:54,008
I realize...
Not finished.
241
00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:57,350
It is because of you
that I now have a criminal record.
242
00:15:57,523 --> 00:16:01,459
And it is because of you that I missed out
on having gelato with Stan Lee.
243
00:16:01,627 --> 00:16:03,458
Maybe you'll have another chance...
No.
244
00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:06,860
I will never have another chance
to have gelato with Stan Lee...
245
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:09,695
because opportunities
to have gelato with Stan Lee...
246
00:16:09,869 --> 00:16:11,427
come but once in a lifetime.
247
00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:16,701
The moving finger writes
and, having writ, moves on.
248
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:24,844
Did he just somehow
give me the finger?
249
00:16:25,451 --> 00:16:28,978
Not just the finger, the moving finger.
250
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:34,051
Hey, Stuart.
251
00:16:34,894 --> 00:16:37,886
Oh, hey, Penny. Wow.
252
00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:39,858
Hi.
253
00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,499
What's going on?
Nothing.
254
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:46,331
I'm just getting ready to close up
and head out.
255
00:16:46,506 --> 00:16:51,307
Cool. Got any fun plans?
Oh, yeah. Big night tonight.
256
00:16:51,577 --> 00:16:55,911
Gonna share a can of tuna
with the cat.
257
00:16:56,082 --> 00:16:57,913
Oh, nice.
258
00:16:58,084 --> 00:17:04,387
Not even my cat. I just feed it.
Some nights, it doesn't even show up.
259
00:17:05,424 --> 00:17:09,190
Oh, okay. Well, I was hoping, um,
you could do me a favor.
260
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:10,590
Sure, yeah. Name it.
261
00:17:10,763 --> 00:17:13,254
I'm kind of responsible
for Sheldon missing Stan Lee.
262
00:17:13,432 --> 00:17:15,764
I really wanna make it up to him.
I was hoping...
263
00:17:15,935 --> 00:17:19,200
you could give me his number
so I can arrange for them to meet.
264
00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:21,772
Oh, I'm sorry.
I don't have his phone number.
265
00:17:21,941 --> 00:17:23,932
Damn. All right. Thank you.
266
00:17:24,110 --> 00:17:25,441
Mm-hm.
267
00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:27,268
Wait.
268
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:29,714
I have his address.
269
00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:32,446
Really? Great.
270
00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:35,553
But I can't give it to you.
271
00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:40,124
Then why did you tell me you had it?
I don't know. Just chatting.
272
00:17:41,427 --> 00:17:45,625
You're looking at a guy who could very well
get stood up by a stray cat tonight.
273
00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:48,630
I'm sorry, Stuart. Thanks anyway.
274
00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:50,132
Mm-hm.
275
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,469
Wait.
276
00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:56,140
Yeah?
Maybe we can make a deal.
277
00:17:57,143 --> 00:17:58,235
What kind of deal?
278
00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:03,312
I will give you the address if you go
to my cousin's wedding with me.
279
00:18:03,482 --> 00:18:06,315
You're extorting a date out of me?
I kind of have to.
280
00:18:06,485 --> 00:18:10,251
The cousin who's getting married is
the cousin I usually go to weddings with.
281
00:18:11,324 --> 00:18:14,487
Can I bring Leonard?
Sure. What the hell?
282
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:17,824
Deal.
We'll tell people he's your cousin.
283
00:18:20,499 --> 00:18:23,161
This is Stan Lee's front door.
284
00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:26,328
We were on Stan Lee's curb,
then we were on Stan Lee's walk...
285
00:18:26,505 --> 00:18:29,303
and now we're at Stan Lee's front door.
Yep.
286
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:34,510
Oh, Lord, you just rang Stan Lee's
doorbell at Stan Lee's house.
287
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,615
We're about to go in and
have milk and cookies with Stan Lee.
288
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:41,412
Sweetie, I don't know if we're gonna
have cookies or what's gonna happen...
289
00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:44,112
so just let me talk and...
290
00:18:44,423 --> 00:18:45,947
Yeah?
291
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:52,189
Are you Stan Lee?
Oh, damn.
292
00:18:52,832 --> 00:18:54,800
Hi. I'm Penny.
This is my friend Sheldon.
293
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:58,368
We're not friends at the moment.
Depends on how this goes.
294
00:18:58,537 --> 00:19:01,506
Right, right. Anyway,
Sheldon here is a huge fan of yours.
295
00:19:01,674 --> 00:19:06,702
He was supposed to meet you the other
day, but he kind of ended up in jail.
296
00:19:07,279 --> 00:19:11,978
I see. And you thought you'd just
come over to my house uninvited?
297
00:19:12,318 --> 00:19:13,808
You said we were invited.
298
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:18,286
Oh, no, no. I said I'm inviting you
to come with me to Stan Lee's house.
299
00:19:19,025 --> 00:19:21,493
You know, you fanboys are unbelievable.
300
00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:25,153
Do you think you can just ring
my doorbell anytime you want?
301
00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:28,858
I mean, why don't you just come on in
and watch the Lakers game with me?
302
00:19:29,869 --> 00:19:33,236
Well, I'm not much of a sports fan,
but thank you.
303
00:19:35,074 --> 00:19:38,339
I'm sorry.
He doesn't really understand sarcasm.
304
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:40,741
Well, I'll give him something
he'll understand.
305
00:19:40,913 --> 00:19:44,246
Joanie, call the police.
Nice to meet you.
306
00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:53,055
Fantastic Four, Daredevil...
307
00:19:53,225 --> 00:19:56,422
Invincible Iron Man,
Happy Hogan, Curt Connors...
308
00:19:56,595 --> 00:19:58,222
Would you just let it go?
309
00:19:59,098 --> 00:20:03,933
And worst of all, Fin Fang Foom.
310
00:20:05,604 --> 00:20:08,835
Hey. Where you been?
I'll tell you where I've been.
311
00:20:09,008 --> 00:20:11,909
You boys may have had gelato
with Stan Lee...
312
00:20:12,078 --> 00:20:15,741
and gotten autographed comics,
but I saw the inside of his house...
313
00:20:15,915 --> 00:20:20,113
and got an autographed application
for a restraining order.
314
00:20:21,620 --> 00:20:23,713
Sweet.
315
00:20:24,290 --> 00:20:27,282
Plus, I get to hang out with him again,
at the hearing.
316
00:20:29,795 --> 00:20:31,285
This is going to look great...
317
00:20:31,464 --> 00:20:34,797
hanging next to my restraining order
from Leonard Nimoy.