Hey! This thing ain't working right.
It's working all right for me.
MAN: Yippee!
(ALL CHEERING)
(MAN SHOUTING IN DISTANCE)
Get busy now. Here he is again.
What's the matter with you? Why aren't you in there helping Lola?
I'm awfully sorry, sir, but the dishes...
Oh, bother the dishes. Do them later!
You know you've got to help her make her changes.
Yes, sir.
Now, get going before I lose my temper.
Now... Come on! Get going! Get going! Go on!
(ALL CHANTING) We want Lola!
We want Lola! We want Lola!
- (MUSIC STOPS) - And now, gentleman,
it has always been my aim
to give you the best entertainment that money can buy.
I have brought here, at great expense...
Ah, get a piece of fat and slide off.
Who said that?
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
- You'll get yours! - (RAUCOUS LAUGHTER)
Hurry, Lola, they're getting restless.
I gotta look good, don't I?
But one of them took at shot at me!
- Oh, quit your whining. - Oh, hurry!
Say, if we ever get enough money together
we'll get out of this one-horse tank.
Come on, hurry!
- How do I look? - Like a million. Come on!
(ALL CHEERING)
♪ Say, I've been roamin' from 'Frisco to Maine
♪ Been huntin' a man that's not too tame
♪ Gotta have something on me to love
♪ Baby dear, that's what you've got
(MEN LAUGHING)
♪ Will ya be my lovey-dovey?
♪ My little honey man?
♪ We could bill and coo
- Baby! - ♪ The way all lovers do
♪ Will ya be my duckie-wuckie?
♪ My little sugar pie?
♪ I'll never make you blue
♪ I'd be so sweet to you...
(MEN EXCLAIMING)
Say, Finn, you're a lucky skate having a swell gal like Lola.
I certainly am.
What do you mean? Why, she's the lucky one
being married to a swell fella like me. Huh!
♪ Will ya be my lovey-dovey?
- That's me! - ♪ My little honey man...
- (CHEERING) - ♪ I'm a little bit lonesome...
Have you seen my husband?
Yeah, there he is, over there.
♪ Won't ya be my ownsome?
- ♪ My little turtle dove? - Will I?
- ♪ Will ya be my... - Waiter! I want a big bottle of wine!
Right here. Come on, bring it over here.
♪ 'Cause I'm looking for a lovin' honey man r
Sweetheart!
Oh!
Hi, Charlie. Hiya, boy.
(EXCLAIMS)
Why don't you watch where you're going?
(WHISTLES)
(SNEEZING)
Hey, Ollie. Look, we're only two miles from town.
Well, I'll never make it.
(SNEEZES) See? I've got one foot in the grave now.
Hey! Go over and stop him. Maybe we can pick up a ride.
I'll get my clothes on. Hurry up.
(CARRIAGE APPROACHING)
Whoa!
(WHEELS SCREECH)
All right, mister, we're in.
Come on, come on.
(OLLIE CHUCKLES)
Are you going to Brushwood Gulch?
- Mmm-hmm. - (CHUCKLES)
We are, too.
A lot of weather we've been having lately.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Pretty. (CHUCKLES)
It's only four months to Christmas. (CHUCKLING)
Do you believe in Santa Claus?
- No. - (CHUCKLING)
Do you mind if I put my hand right there?
(SHOUTING AND YELLING)
I saw her first. Come.
That's it.
Darling!
Not you! I meant my husband.
- Have a nice trip, darling? - Lovely.
Until these two came aboard.
And they've done nothing but annoy me all the way in.
Here, you run along home.
Good bye.
Fiddlin', huh?
Well, we don't like your kind around these parts
and there's one thing we don't allow
and that's messing with our women.
Now if you wanna stay healthy,
you better catch the next coach out of town.
Why, yes, sir, we'll be glad to,
just as soon as we've finished with our business.
And if you miss the next coach,
you'll be riding out of here in a hearse.
Good day, strangers.
- Good day, sir. - Goodbye!
Let well enough alone.
♪ ...to prancin'
♪ Commence advancin' right and left a-glancin'
♪ Commence your dancin' slide and glide entrancin'
♪ You do the tango jiggle with the Texas Tommy wiggle
♪ Take your partner and you hold her
♪ Slightly enfold her, a little bolder Just work your shoulder
♪ Snap your fingers one and all in the hall at the ball
♪ That's all
♪ Some ball
♪ Commence to dancin'
- (YODELLING) - ♪ Commence to prancin'
♪ Commence advancin' right and left a-glancin'
(YODELLING CONTINUES)
♪ You do the tango jiggle with the Texas Tommy wiggle
♪ Take your partner and you hold her
♪ Slightly enfold her, a little bolder Just work your shoulder
♪ Snap your fingers one and all in the hall at the ball
♪ That's all
♪ Some ball
♪ Commence to dancin'
♪ Commence to prancin'
♪ Commence advancin' right and left a-glancin'
♪ Commence your dancin' slide and glide entrancin'
♪ You do the tango jiggle with the Texas Tommy wiggle
♪ Take your partner and you hold her
♪ Slightly enfold her, a little bolder Just work your shoulder
♪ Snap your fingers one and all in the hall at the ball
♪ That's all
♪ Some ball
- ♪ Commence to dancin' - (YODELLING)
♪ Commence to prancin'
♪ Commence advancin' right and left a-glancin'
♪ Commence your dancin' slide and glide entrancin'
♪ You do the tango jiggle with a Texas Tommy wiggle
♪ Take your partner and you hold her
♪ Slightly enfold her, a little bolder Just work your shoulder
♪ Snap your fingers one and all in the hall at the ball
♪ That's all
♪ Some ball
♪ Commence to dancin'
♪ Commence to prancin'
♪ Commence advancin' right and left a-glancin'
♪ Commence your dancin' slide and glide entrancin'
♪ You do the tango jiggle with a Texas Tommy wiggle
♪ Take your partner and you hold her
♪ Slightly enfold her, a little bolder Just work your shoulder
♪ Snap your fingers one and all in the hall at the ball
♪ That's all
♪ Some ball
♪ Commence to dancin'
♪ Commence to prancin'
♪ Commence advancin' right and left a-glancin'
♪ Commence your dancin' slide and glide entrancin'
♪ You do the tango jiggle with a Texas Tommy wiggle
♪ Take your partner and you hold her
♪ Slightly enfold her, a little bolder Just work your shoulder
♪ Snap your fingers one and all in the hall at the ball
♪ That's all
♪ Some ball a'
(ALL LAUGHING)
Howdy, chaps. What'll it be?
Er, do you know the whereabouts
of a young lady by the name of Mary Roberts?
BARTENDER: Sure. She's around here some place.
Oh, er... I'm Miss Roberts' guardian. What do you want to see her for?
Why, we have some very important news for her.
Oh. What's it about?
Well, I'm sorry, sir,
but we're not supposed to discuss that with anyone but her.
Yeah, you see, it's private.
Her father died and left her a gold mine
and we're not supposed to tell anybody but her.
See. Didn't we, Ollie?
- A gold mine? - It's the biggest thing in the...
Now that he's taken you into our confidence,
you might as well know the rest.
Shh.
(SOFTLY) We've got the deed to the property
and we're supposed to give it to her in person...
What?
I said we've got the deed to the property...
Say, you better show it to him, maybe he doesn't believe us.
It's the truth.
Say, did I give you the deed?
Oh, I know where it is. Excuse me.
See? Mary Roberts.
Come here.
- Have you ever seen this Mary Roberts? - Uh-uh.
Good. Well, I'll go and find her for you,
but don't tell a soul about it till I get back.
- We won't. - Thank you.
A good thing we found her.
Lola!
Lola, we've got a fortune right in the palm of our hand.
What do you mean?
There's a couple of desert rats downstairs looking for Mary Roberts.
What about it?
They've got a deed to a very valuable gold mine,
left to her by her father, and they're here to deliver it to her in person.
Well, ain't that just grand.
It would be if you were Mary Roberts.
I got you, but I'd never get away with it.
Sure you would. They've never seen Mary Roberts.
Then it's a cinch!
(WINCES)
Put that shoe on properly.
- What's the matter with it? - I can't eat that meat!
That's as tough as shoe leather!
- Think you can do it? - Can I do it?
For a gold mine, I could be Cleopatra.
That's the girl!
- Bring 'em up. - I will. Oh!
Hey! If you come upstairs, I'll introduce you to Mary Roberts.
- Right away, sir. - Did you call me, Mr Finn?
Ooh!
No... Get back into the kitchen where you belong. Go ahead now!
This way, gentlemen. Come right this way.
This way, gentlemen.
Just sit yourselves down and I'll go and get Lola... I mean Mary, for you.
I've already told her the news and she's terribly shocked.
- Lola! They're here. - That's swell, kiddo.
Put these in your arms.
Mary, these are the gentlemen I was telling you about.
Tell me... Tell me about my dear, dear daddy.
Is it true that he's dead?
Well, we hope he is, they buried him.
Oh, it can't be.
What did he die of?
I think he died of a Tuesday. Or was it Wednesday? Do you...
I'll handle this delicate situation.
Little lady, you've heard the worst...
Now prepare yourself for the best.
Now, cheer up. Smile. That's right.
Remember, every cloud has a silver lining.
That's right. Any bird can build a nest,
but it isn't everyone that can lay an egg, is it, Ollie?
That's right.
(EXHALES)
Do you realise that you own
one of the richest gold mines in the world?
LOLA; Oh.
Your father left you the whole property.
And he gave me the honour of presenting you with the deed.
- Oh, isn't it wonderful, Uncle Finn? - Yes, my dear.
- Who's there? - Mary.
- Mary who'? - Mary... Mary Christmas.
Excuse me, Mr Finn, one of these gentleman
dropped this at the foot of the stairs.
Ooh! Thank you, little lady.
You don't know what you've done! Thanks.
All right, all right, all right.
There you are, signed, sealed
and now... Delivered.
Oh. Thank you so much.
Not at all.
(SIGHS)
- Come, Stanley, we'd better be going. - Yeah.
- Oh! Say, what about the locket? - That's right!
- We've got something else for you. - I almost forgot it.
And besides that,
your father left you this family heirloom.
Oh, yes. I remember it well.
Help me get it off, Stan.
Am I hurting you?
No. Just a minute.
- Won't be long. - Yeah.
Maybe I'd better try and open it again.
I think so.
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
it slipped.
Maybe you better take your coat off.
Pardon me just a minute.
We'll find it in just a moment.
We got it.
I'll go in and change. Pardon us.
- Say, Ollie? - What?
Now that you got your clothes off why don't you take a bath?
Would you mind leaving the room? Can't I ever have a little privacy?
I was just trying to kill two birds with one stone.
And I'll take care of those two bozos and get them out of town.
Don't worry, leave everything to me.
I've done pretty good up to now, haven't I?
You certainly have. I wish you were in my shoes...
(CLEARS THROAT) Oh, how about a drink on the house?
That suits me fine.
- How'd you get dressed so quick? - None of your business.
Goodbye, Miss Roberts, and thanks for the use of your boudoir.
- You're very welcome. - Goodbye.
Now that you've got the mine I bet you'll be a swell gold-digger.
- What's your evil plan? - I'll send her right up.
You have her sign that deed over to us.
Oh, don't worry about me,
get those guys out of town, and pronto!
All right.
What a cinch.
Give the gentlemen the best of the house.
- Yes, sir. - I'll be back in a minute.
♪ On a mountain in Virginia
♪ Stands a lonesome pine
♪ Just below
♪ ls the cabin home
♪ Of a little girl of mine
♪ Her name is June
♪ And very, very soon
♪ She'll belong to me
♪ For I know she's waiting there for me
♪ 'Neath that lone pine tree
♪ In the
♪ Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia
♪ On the trail of the lonesome pine
♪ In the pale moonshine our hearts entwine
♪ Where she carved her name and I carved mine
♪ Oh, June just like the mountains, I'm blue
♪ Like the pine
♪ I am lonesome for you
♪ Ooh-hoo-oo-ooh
♪ In the
♪ Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia
♪ On the trail of the lonesome pine
(IN DEEP VOICE) ♪ In the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia
♪ On the trail of the lonesome pine
♪ In the pale moonshine our hearts entwine
♪ Where she carved her name and I carved mine
♪ Oh, June
♪ Like the mountains, I'm blue
♪ Like the pine, I am lonesome for you
(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) ♪ In the
♪ Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia
♪ On the trail of the lonesome pine I
(SNORING)
Well, that's fine.
Miss Lola, what is this for?
Oh, er, now whatever we do on your behalf is legal.
- Oh, thank you very much. - Oh, don't mention it, darling.
- Now run right along with your work. - Yes, ma'am.
Well, here's looking at you.
(DOG GROWLING)
STANLEY: Shoo!
Shoo! Shoo! Shoo!
(DOGS BARKING EXCITEDLY)
Shoo!
Well, I've got to be going.
- Well, so have we. Goodbye, Mr Finn. - Goodbye.
- Goodbye, mister. - Goodbye, sir.
- Goodbye. - Have a good time.
Goodbye, Miss, er... Miss, er...
Roberts. Mary Roberts.
- Goodbye, Miss Roberts. - Goodbye.
Did you hear what she said her name was?
Sure, Mary Roberts.
How can she be Mary Roberts
when we've just given the deed to Mary Roberts?
I don't know.
- I smell a rat. - (SIZZLING)
I smell something, too.
Come on.
Pardon me. Did you ever have a father by the name of Cy Roberts?
Why, yes!
He left me here with these people years ago when he went prospecting.
- Well, who's that woman upstairs? - That's Lola Marcel, Mr Finn's wife.
She's my legal guardian now.
Can I speak to you for a minute?
- Pardon us. - Yeah, we'll be right back.
- You know what? - What?
I think we've given that deed to the wrong woman.
It's the first mistake we've made
since that guy sold us the Brooklyn Bridge.
Oh, buying that bridge was no mistake.
That's gonna be worth a lot of money to us someday.
Maybe you're right. We'd better go and get the deed.
Say, maybe they won't give it back to us.
What do you mean they won't give it back to us?
We'll get that deed or I'll eat your hat.
That's what I call determination.
Come on.
Splendid, splendid! (LAUGHING)
She fell for it like you fell for me.
(CHUCKLES) Lola my girl, we're sitting pretty.
- Who's there? - Me.
- Me who? - "Me who"!
What do you want?
Out of my way, you snake in the grass.
You toad-in-the-hole.
Say, you slugs, what do you mean busting in here like this?
We want to know why you are not Mary Roberts.
I'll take care of this matter.
So you got wise, huh?
Well, if it's this deed you're after, you're just out of luck.
- Give that back to me! - Take it, Stan! Beat it!
(ALL CLAMOURING)
(OLLIE YELLING)
Ahhh!
Oh!
(BLOWING)
Oh!
That's it, Stan!
Take it. Take it, Stan!
Go on, Stanley!
Go on! Get it, Stan!
Give me that deed.
Get away. Get away!
Why don't you...
(LOLA EXCLAIMS)
Give me that! Oh!
Open it! Stan!
Get away from that door. Get away from it.
Get away. Get away. Go ahead. Go ahead.
Now, you stop. Stop that.
Stop! (GIGGLES) Stop...
(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
Ollie, come and get me!
(SHRIEKING)
I said get back! Try this, you better get back.
(SHRIEKING) Ollie! Come and get me.
(GUN FIRES)
I told you, get back.
Not yet, not yet! (LAUGHS)
Stay where you are. Don't move.
Ha-ha!
Ho-ho!
- Hee-hee! - Oh!
(FINN SHOUTING)
(LAUGHING)
(FINN CONTINUES SHOUTING)
Here, Stan, take it.
(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
I can't stand it!
Now, get 'em out of here.
FINN: Get out!
Now... Get out of here.
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR) - Who's there?
- The sheriff! - Just in the nick of time.
Now we'll get justice.
Come in, Sheriff. You're just the man I'm looking for.
And you're just the man I'm looking for.
Oh, thank you. This man... Oh!
(CONTINUES LAUGHING)
I thought I told you two dudes to catch the next coach out of town.
Yes, sir.
Well, it left ten minutes ago.
It did? Maybe we'd better try and catch it.
I'll say you'd better try and catch it!
(GUNSHOTS)
Look at them go!
Ha! You can't see 'em for dust.
(SHERIFF AND FINN LAUGHING)
- Say, Ollie. - What?
You don't think we're taking any chance going back there tonight
and robbing that safe, do you?
Chance or no chance, we've got to get that deed back.
And just as soon as my clothes are dry,
that's exactly what we're going to do.
I think that's a good idea.
You know, if that girl ever found out...
Give me a light!
Those matches are soaking wet.
Thank you.
See if my clothes are dry.
Your hat's dry.
That reminds me. You made a statement this afternoon.
- Did I? - Mmm-hmm.
You said that if we didn't get the deed
that you'd eat my hat.
Oh, now you're taking me literally.
Nevertheless, I'm going to teach you not to make rash promises.
Eat the hat.
Oh, that's silly. Who ever heard of anybody eating a hat?
Who ever heard of anybody doing that?
- Eat the hat. - I won't do it.
If you don't eat that hat,
I'll tie you to a tree and let the buzzards get you.
- Would you really do that? - I certainly would.
(WHIMPERING) I never heard that before.
Eat it.
(METAL TWANGS)
(LOUD CRACKING)
(CRACKING)
Get my clothes.
(SIGHS)
Oh!
(BLOWS) Ooh!
Shh!
(WHISPERS) Wait a minute, I'll help you.
(CRASHING AND CLANGING)
(OLLIE EXCLAIMS)
Shh!
What did you wanna go and push me in there like that for?
You're the dumbest thing I ever saw.
Hey. Hey. I've got an idea.
Why don't we climb up on the shed,
then we can get onto the balcony and we can go in that door?
And it'll save us going through the front.
Now, that deserves consideration.
- Shh! - Shh!
Shh!
(BOTH SHUSHING)
(OLLIE GRUNTING)
(LOUD CRASHING)
(WHISPERS) Hey!
Psst! Psst!
Hey, Ollie. Psst!
Are you all right? Psst!
Wait, I'll get a ladder for you.
Won't be a minute. Shh!
I'm going to get a ladder for him.
(BOTH SHUSHING)
We'll follow our original plan and go through the front way.
Now, go ahead.
Do you mind if I have another idea?
If it's anything like the last one, yes.
What is it?
How about me pulling you up on the block and tackle?
(WHISPERING) I can pull you up.
- What are you doing out here? - What?
- There's something wrong here. - Yes, it's you.
Come on back to bed. You're scaring me half to death.
Come on, go to bed.
Here, hold that.
Now, are you all ready?
- Upsy-daisy. - Now, don't get fancy.
Just get me up there.
(WHISPERING) Higher.
Wait a minute till I spit on me hands.
All right.
Argh! Oh!
Upsy-daisy.
I'll spit on 'em again to make sure.
(GROANS SOFTLY)
Hand me the end of that rope.
Now, hold out your hand.
Hold out your hand!
This one.
(WINCES)
(BLOWING)
Now, tie that on the mule.
Tie that on the mule!
Get on the mule.
Get on the mule!
(CLICKS TONGUE)
Hey!
- Where are the tools? - In the saddlebag.
You better hand them to me.
Okay.
I'll be right...
(OLLIE SCREAMING)
What are you trying to do?
- I want to get the mule down. - Never mind that now.
We'll attend to that later.
- Maybe we can get in through here. - That's a good idea.
(DINAH SHUSHING)
(BOTH SHUSHING)
Wait there, we'll be right up.
(BOTH SHUSHING)
(BRAYING)
Shh!
- What? What's the matter? - Will you stop laughing in your sleep?
- I'm not laughing! - Don't tell me!
I'd know your laugh anyplace. Now, go to sleep.
Keeping me awake all night like this.
(WHISPERING) Hey.
Psst!
(WHISTLES)
(BOTH SHUSHING)
(MOUTHING)
(SCREAMS)
OLLIE: Oh!
- What are you doing here? - Shh!
As soon as I get out of here, we'll explain everything.
FINN: Mary, Mary, what are you doing down there?
Hide me! Hide me!
FINN: What's that noise down there? Answer me!
Mary?
No, no. Come and hide.
FINN: Mary, what's going on down there?
What's that noise?
What are you roaming around at this time of night?
Mr Finn, I thought...
You thought! Get back to bed and not another peep out of you.
Go ahead! Waking up the house like this!
(GROANING IN PAIN)
Shh!
Please, what are you doing here?
Come on in and I'll tell you all about it. Shh!
- Ollie? - OLLIE: What?
Wait there, I'll be right back. Shh.
(INAUDIBLE)
You put on your clothes and we'll see you later.
Shh.
(GROANS)
- Where have you been? - I told Mary what happened.
As soon as we get the deed, she's going to leave town with us.
- Good. Where is she now? - Yeah.
She's putting on her clothes. She's gonna meet us outside.
Fine. Now, get me out of this, will you?
Okay.
Take it easy, now.
(OLLIE GRUNTING)
You can't...
You can't do it that way.
(BONES CRACKING)
(GROANS, COUGHS)
Take it easy. Shh!
(GRUNTING)
I'll pull you up in just a jiff.
Maybe I can pull you all the way through.
Let go! You're choking...
(CRASHING)
(OLLIE GROANING)
- Ooh, me apple. - Are you all right?
Shh!
(COIN CLATTERS)
(WHIRRING)
- (BELL RINGING) - (COINS TUMBLING)
Oh!
What did you wanna go and do that for?
Well, I didn't know it was gonna...
- Shh! - Shh!
(SCREAMING)
FINN: Mary! What are you doing down there?
What's going on?
Mary! Mary?
Mary?
Would you move over?
(DISSONANT CHORD CLANGS)
(PLAYING PIANO AGGRESSIVELY)
(SHOUTING)
Give me that!
Put up your hands! Not you.
What are you gonna do?
I'm going to take you upstairs and make you give us that deed.
- You can't do that! - Go on.
Now, get in that room. Go on. Open that safe and give us that deed.
Hurry UP-
(LOLA SCREAMS)
Get back in that room. Go on! Get in there!
Now, give us that deed.
Come on, take it, Stan.
Now, get in there and get to bed. Go on.
- (YELLING) - Go on. Shut up!
You can't get away with it!
- Get in that bed. Get in there. - You can't do this! I'll fix you!
- Tie him up. - What are you gonna do?
- Never mind what we're gonna do.
- You can't! You can't do that! - Shut up.
- You can't do this.
I'll get you!
You go and get Dinah, I'll take care of him.
Let me... Take me out of this!
FINN: You can't. You can't do that! OLLIE: Shut up!
Let me out of here. Let me down! Let me out of here.
What are you gonna do? What are you gonna do?
You'll suffer for this! I'll get you for this!
- (WHISTLES) - Let me go. Let me go!
Help! Lola! Lola!
Lola! Lola! Lola!
Lola! Help me, Lola!
- Oh! - Lola!
(GROANING)
FINN: Hey! Come back! Come back!
Come back! Come back!
(FINN SHOUTING)
Well, now that our troubles are over, where do we go from here?
Why, I'd like to go back to where I was born.
- Where is that? - Way down South.
- Are you from the South? - I sure am.
Well, fan my brow! I'm from the South.
- You are? - Mmm-hmm.
Well, shut my mouth! I's from the South, too.
South of what, sir?
- The South of London. - London!
Well, honey, we'll all go down to Dixie.
Oh, for a slice of possum and yam. Ooh!
Yes, sir. And some good old fish and chips.
I can smell 'em.
Fish and chips!
♪ We're going to go We're going to go
♪ We're going to go way down in Dixie
♪ Where the hens are doggone glad to lay
♪ Scrambled eggs in the new mown hay
♪ We're going to see We're going to see
♪ We're going to see our home in Dixie
♪ You can tell the world we're going to
- ♪ D-I-X - I know how to spell it.
♪ Then we're going All right, we're going
♪ You know we're going You bet we're going
♪ To our home in Dixieland
♪ We're going to go way down in Dixie
♪ Where the hens are doggone glad to lay
♪ Scrambled eggs in the new mown hay
♪ We're going to see We're going to see
♪ We're going to see... ♪