[instrumental music]
[crowd applauding]
[bat knocking]
[audience cheering]
[bat knocking]
[crowd cheering]
[instrumental music]
[music continues]
[mellow music]
Hold it, boys.
Steady...that's
it.
- Alright for you, Pete?
- Sure.
Alright, boys, change clothes
if you want to..
- 'But get back to work.'
- And make it snappy.
Well, Mike, what have
you
got for us?
Well, we're starting
spring training
with the same line-up
as last year's
Taylor behind the bat
and Gordon on third.
Goldberg, douse that heater.
[coughs]
Yes, sir.
And to round out the infield,
we're having
that old double-play
combination.
- O'Brien to Ryan to Goldberg.
- Maybe.
Well, you've got Goldberg
alright, but they tell me
O'Brien and Ryan
ain't showing up this
year.
- What?
- Don't make me laugh.
Listen, you can tell your
readers that O'Brien and Ryan
are on their way
right here this minute.
And what's more, they've been
working out all winter.
- And they're in the pink.
- Sure. Okay.
Thanks, fellas.
What did you hear
from O'Brien and Ryan?
Not a word. I sent 10
telegrams,
and they ain't answered one.
Well, here's one they'll
answer.
Where are they?
They're in, uh,
Pottstown, Illinois.
Get a pencil and
paper.
Write this down.
O'Brien and Ryan,
Pottstown,
Illinois.
Who do you guys
think you are?
Stop.
Get your carcass on
the first train to
Florida
or I'll throw you
both
out of baseball.
- "I'll throw.."
- Wait a minute.
Make a change there, uh..
Just say, uh..
Please,
fellas,
we need you.
[dramatic music]
♪ Nelly Kelly
loved baseball games ♪
♪ Knew the players
knew all their names ♪
♪ You could see her there
every day ♪
♪ Shout hooray ♪
♪ When they'd play ♪
♪ Her boyfriend
by the name of Joe said ♪
♪ To Coney Isle dear we'll go ♪
♪ Then Nelly started
to fret and pout ♪
♪ And to him
I heard her shout ♪
♪ Hey! ♪
♪ Take me
out to the ball game ♪
♪ Take me out
with the crowd ♪
♪ Buy me some peanuts
and Cracker Jack ♪
♪ I don't care
if I never get back ♪
♪ Let me root root root
for the home team ♪
♪ If they don't win
it's a shame ♪
♪ 'Cause it's one ♪
♪ Two ♪
♪ Three strikes you're out
at the old ball game ♪♪
[feet tapping]
[instrumental music]
[music continues]
[crowd applauding]
- Give them a bow.
- Huh?
You wanna chase 'em all home?
You wanna?
Yeah, we wanna.
Why don't you stop stealing
bows, why don't you?
Why don't you mind your
own
business, why don't you?
Oh, you bonehead.
I got a notion
to--
- To what?
- Hey, Danny, cut it out.
Will ya?
- Oh!
- Hey, you big lug!
- Now, wait a minute, Eddie.
- Eddie, hold it!
Damn it. Come on, wake up, kid.
We're in a hurry.
- What happened?
- Oh, nothing.
- This happens all the time.
- It does?
Yes, every once in a while
he gets illusions.
- He thinks he's got muscles.
- Hey, you're not pulling out?
- Are you?
- Yeah. We..
We got to catch a train,
we're joining
the ball club in Florida.
- Oh.
Now look..
Goodbye, baby
doll.
- See you next season!
- Goodbye.
Lucky punch,
that's what it was.
Uh-huh, how many times
have I told you
to pick on somebody
your size?
There ain't nobody
my size.
Why, I could've knocked
the big lug for a loop.
It's just that, well,
I didn't wanna hurt my hands.
Oh, sure.
What, you want me to show up
at spring training
with a busted hand, do you?
Hey, you save these
pictures,
don't you?
For the kids
at the park, yeah.
Hey, that's me.
I'd sooner have my
picture
in front of a theater.
Ah, you and your
show business.
Ah.
Gee, it's gonna be great
to get back
in that old ball game again.
I can hear the umps now.
"Batteries for today..
...Rube Waddell
and Ossee Schreck."
Kind of chokes you up,
doesn't it?
Yeah, it chokes
me.
Kehhh!
When I think of
the dames I lost
because I had to be
in bed by 10
o'clock.
Can play a lot
of checkers by 10 o'clock.
No, sir, brother.
Give me
Vaudeville
anytime
and maybe a musical show.
Fifty girls. Fifty.
Maybe even a 100 girls, a 100.
Oh, boy.
Gee, I suppose it would be
more fun than playing
checkers.
You suppose?
Hey, you know, Denny
you're getting old
enough to find out.
Well, to tell you
the truth, Ed, um
lately, I-I have been thinking
a lot about romance
and about girls.
- No.
- Yeah.
[chuckling]
Hey, they smiled at
us.
Let's go talk to
We don't even know them.
But I feel like talking.
I'm a very sociable fellow.
Well, um,
let's go talk
to those fellas
over there, huh?
Denny..
...it ain't the same.
[instrumental music]
Sam, drop our stuff
at the hotel, will you?
Yes, sir, Mr. O'Brien.
How are you?
How you doin', kids?
You gonna cop another
pennant this season?
- How's your throwing arm?
- You got any pictures?
There's the guy
with the pictures.
Got thousands of them.
There you are.
Gee, what a sight, huh?
'Oh, you got to admit,
it's a great thrill.'
Who's knocking it?
Kind of a warm feeling comes
over you, doesn't it?
Happens to me
every spring.
[instrumental music]
- Denny!
- Eddie!
[clamoring]
Hey! Hey, you lugs!
Come here!
It's about time!
Ryan, how are you?
- Good to see you--
- O'Brien!
- Goldberg!
- Hey, Eddie! Dennis!
How are you? Hey!
How you been?
Hey, what about
your
Vaudeville tour?
Oh, it was great.
We worked every town in the USA.
But we didn't work hard.
We had time for play.
The art shows, the bird walks,
the museums were nice.
Denny, tell them
about the girls
the quails, the mice.
- The mice!
- Oh, yeah. The girls!
♪ I kissed a gal
in Old Wyoming ♪
♪ She rode a horse in a wild
west show yee-hoo! ♪
♪ When I said baby
I'm bent on roamin' ♪
♪ She cried
we just got started ♪
♪ And she sighed
we can't be parted ♪
♪ But I left her
broken-hearted ♪
♪ At the rodeo ♪
♪ Oh yes indeed ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ The boy said no ♪
♪ Yes indeed yes indeedy ♪
♪ I left her broken-hearted
at the rodeo ♪
♪ I kissed a gal
way out in Boise ♪
♪ That's Idaho
where potatoes grow ♪
♪ I went away and
her sobs were noisy ♪
♪ I said
I'll see you later ♪
♪ And I hopped
the nearest freighter ♪
♪ Left her holdin'
a potater ♪
♪ Down in Idaho ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ The boy said no ♪
♪ Yes indeed yes indeedy ♪
♪ She's left with her
potatoes
down in Idaho ♪
♪ I kissed a gal
in Old Poughkeepsie ♪
♪ That's where the college
of Vassar's found ♪
♪ She couldn't study
love made her tipsy ♪
♪ Her teachers
wouldn't pass her ♪
♪ So she just
turned on the gas ♪
♪ And now the sweetest
girl at Vassar's ♪
♪ In the cold
cold ground ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ The boy's a hound ♪
♪ Yes indeed yes indeedy ♪
♪ The sweetest gal at Vassar's
in the cold cold ground ♪
♪ I met a gal
when we hit Manhattan ♪
♪ A scrumptious babe
dressed in silk and lace ♪
♪ Her eyes were stars
and her skin was satin ♪
♪ I told her
how I'd miss her ♪
♪ Then she murmured
that and this-er ♪
♪ So I thought I'd
try to kiss her ♪
♪ But she
slapped my face ♪
♪ No ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ Yes indeed
couldn't reach first base ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ I thought I'd try
to kiss her ♪
♪ But she slapped my face ♪
♪ I kissed a gal
down in Mississippi ♪
♪ A southern belle
name of Emmy Jo ♪
♪ That was her name ♪
♪ I thought for once
love had got me dippy ♪
♪ She called me
lucky seven ♪
♪ Said my kisses
were from heaven ♪
♪ Then I learned
she was 11 ♪
♪ And I had to go ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ The boy said no ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ Her age was just 11
so he had to go ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ Yes indeedy ♪
♪ Yes indeed ♪
♪ The boys played hey! ♪
♪ Yes indeed yes indeedy ♪
♪ We're hot
as electric wires ♪
♪ Twice as hot
as forest fires ♪
♪ And the biggest
pair of liars.. ♪
- Liars?
Mm-hmm.
- What the hey?
♪ We're the biggest
pair of liars ♪
♪ In the USA ♪♪
[all cheering]
- Hey, Gilhuly!
- Hiya, Mike.
Hiya, Mike. How are you?
Hey, what's ailing him?
I got some bad news
for you, fellas.
- What?
- This just came.
"From the law
office
of Hergenscheimer
Hergenscheimer,
Hergenscheimer.."
Never mind the batting order.
"Gentlemen,
this will inform you
"that according to the will
"of the late
Colonel J.B. Newhouse
"former owner of the baseball
club known as the Wolves
"all rights
and interests in said club
"have been bequeathed
to the late
"colonel's young
and distant relative
"one K.C. Higgins
"who will arrive
in Florida on the 10th instant
"to assert ownership
"and actively participate
"in the management
of said club.
Yours truly,
Joseph Hergenscheimer."
Who's K.C. Higgins?
Whoever he is,
he'll probably wanna pitch.
You mean we gotta take
orders
from some dopey kid
who never swang a bat?
- Looks that way.
- Not to me, it doesn't.
I don't know about
you fellas
but I want us
to win the pennant.
You don't cop any prize money
finishing last place.
You know, a thing like this
happened to Baltimore once.
They had to dig 'em
out of the cellar.
If this guy opens
his trap, I quit.
So do I!
[indistinct chatter]
Wait a second! Wait a second!
Quiet! Quiet. Quiet.
Wait a minute! Wait a minute.
Wait a minute now.
How about a little
fair play here, boys?
You guys don't even
know this Higgins.
Now here's what I say.
He's gonna arrive here
Sunday morning
and until that time,
let's keep an open mind.
And above all, let's not
judge him too hastily..
...the little rat.
You take the back end.
You Mr. Higgins?
K.C. Higgins?
- Higgins?
- No.
Good.
- Either of you Higgins?
- No.
- Oh!
- Oh! I'm so sorry--
- That's alright.
- Gosh, I-I..
I-I never did have
any sense of direction
Miss, uh, K.C..
Uh, Miss Higgins.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
Florida Palms Hotel, please.
K.C. Higgins!
He's a girl!
Ha ha ha!
[whistling "Funeral March
of a Marionette"]
Uh, miss..
Are you, uh,
looking
for someone?
Well, uh, yes, I am.
Michael Gilhuly.
He's the manager
of the Wolves.
Uh, could you point him out
to me, please?
Well, it would be
an awful long
point.
He's down at
the railroad
station.
- Oh.
- He went to meet the 12:10.
Well, that's the train
I came in on.
Oh, I must have missed him.
Yeah? Well, I
wonder
how he missed you.
[laughter]
Mike ought to be
along very soon now.
Denny, where are your manners?
Why don't you give the
lady
your seat?
Oh, I'm sorry, ma'am.
Won't you sit down, miss?
One of our very nicest chairs.
Go read your funny papers.
Mike's in a pretty
nasty
temper this morning.
- You're not kidding!
- Boy, is he..
Well, uh, what seems
to be the trouble?
He-he's going to get
the new owner of the
club.
- Well, i-is that bad?
- Bad? Ho-ho-ho!
Say, by the way,
on the trip down
you didn't run into
a fathead
named Higgins, did you?
- A-a little fathead?
- Yeah.
Yeah, some-some lame brain
from Providence, Rhode
Island.
Excuse me, but I have--
Yeah, you better wait
until Mike cools off.
Now-now, look, baby doll, uh,
just put yourself in my hands.
[clicks tongue]
Fast worker, that boy.
Just met her,
and he's rounding third.
Yeah, it's a sad
situation, miss.
Now, picture this,
here we are
the greatest team
in baseball, the champs
and this little fathead
from Providence
is gonna come down here
and teach us the game.
[chuckles]
How do you like that?
- Oh, it's very depressing.
- Yeah.
Don't ever be a ballplayer,
miss.
Well, I'll try to avoid it.
Look, uh, let's talk about you.
Uh, what are you doing
tonight after dinner?
Well, I-I hadn't made any..
- After dinner?
- Yeah.
How about stepping out a little?
Just the two of us, huh?
Well..
Aren't you ball players
supposed
to be in training?
Training? Who, me? Ha!
I don't believe in it.
- You don't say?
- Nah.
Well, uh, what time do
you
usually get in?
Well, uh, we're supposed
to be in by 10 o'clock
but, uh, well, it's alright
for the other fellas
but I usually get in
about midnight.
Oh, except, of course, when
I have an extra-special date.
Then I get in
about, uh, 2:00 or 3:00.
Tonight, I could
stay up till 5:00.
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
Well, won't Mr.
Gilhuly
get mad?
What I always say is,
what the boss
doesn't know doesn't hurt me.
[chuckles]
You get it, sister?
Oh, I get it, brother.
Oh, watch, here he is.
Uh, Mike, how are you, Mike?
I'd like you to meet a
friend
of mine, Miss, uh..
Higgins. K.C. Higgins.
I'm afraid I missed you
at the station.
- I'm sorry.
- That's alright.
We've had a very interesting
chat, Mr. O'Brien and I.
- Haven't we?
- Yeah.
We sure have, Miss Higgins.
Just call me fathead.
[indistinct chatter]
Take it easy, now, Eddie.
Aw! Pop-up!
What's bothering you, Ed?
You swing like a rusty gate.
- He's lost his batting eye.
- Yeah.
Mr. O'Brien, you're
stepping in the
bucket.
- How's that?
- I said..
You're stepping in the bucket.
Oh, thank you.
Maybe you'd like to come over
here and show me how to do it.
Well, if you won't mind..
I'd like to.
Uh, Slappy, would you get
me
the water bucket, please?
May I?
You see, Mr. O'Brien,
here's what's happening.
Instead of stepping
into the ball like this
you're stepping over here
and, uh, into the bucket. Hm?
Now, uh, let me
get this
straight.
Uh, when I stand at the
plate,
I'm like this, hmm?
No, I hold it
a little higher, up
here.
Up here, you see?
And while waiting for the
pitch,
I wiggle a little bit.
Like this.
Just to get myself set.
[stammers]
Yes. Yes,
I've noticed that.
- Now as the ball comes over..
- Uh-huh?
Try stepping into it as you
bring the bat back like..
Ow!
[laughter]
Sorry, Mr. O'Brien.
Would you try it, please?
Pitch to him, would you, Joe?
But easy on that arm.
Yeah, easy on the arm.
Okay.
Hey! What a poke!
Wow! That's four bases
in any ball park!
That's the idea, Eddie,
but don't try to kill them
all.
You know, Charlie Davis
of Cincinnati only hit 279
but he batted in a 102 runs.
Why don't you get
Charlie Davis?
Cut the cracks, Eddie.
Oh, Mr. Gilhuly
I-I seem to have
taken over your
job.
Ha! Not at all, Miss Higgins.
Not at all.
I'm sorry.
Please forgive
me.
I'll see you
back at the
hotel.
Fine. Alright.
Let's get busy in there.
Get around now. Come on, Davis.
You're up.
- Come on.
- Alright, Denny boy..
[indistinct chatter]
- Come on. boys.
- Alright now get a hold of
one!
- Hey!
- Hey, look out!
Gee! Ain't that somethin'?
She's the kind of girl
I've always dreamed about.
Wouldn't it be wonderful
to be married
to a girl who played baseball?
Gee!
[clamoring]
Yeah, I remember this time
last season
we were playing Scranton.
- Yeah?
- Great town. Great town!
Well, anyway, there's a
dame
there named Maxine
who's kind of sweet on me
a very refined,
artistic little
chick
with plenty on the ball.
A cooch dancer
from the circus.
That's what I mean!
Hey, Goldberg,
give me the
bread.
Anyway, this minx
is really warm for
me
and one night she's walking
me
home after the show.
And all of a sudden, I hear
a flute playing a cooch
dance
you know, like this..
[humming cooch tune]
- Good evening, boys.
- Good evening.
- Evening, Miss Higgins.
- Hello, Denny.
Sit down.
What do you think it
is,
a formal affair?
She gonna eat with us, too?
Hey, watch your
language, fellas
and your table manners, too.
Gee, she called me Denny.
This may not be such
a good idea, Miss
Higgins.
You're kind of
cramping
their style.
Yeah. They're not used
to eating with skirts.
I-I mean ladies.
Look, Mike, the sooner they
get
used to seeing me around
the better it's going
to be for all of us.
Yes, ma'am.
Uh, would someone be so kind as
to pass me the bread, please?
- Yes, indeed.
- With pleasure.
Thank you.
Mind your manners.
[slurping]
- Shh!
- What's the matter?
I had my pinkie out, didn't I?
Temper, Mr. Zalinka.
Temper, temper!
Have you boys
seen the fashion page
in this week's
"Vanity Fair?"
[gasps]
Well, there's
the cutest pair of pants
with a pegged top
and a narrow bottom..
[gasps]
If you'll pardon
the expression, and there's--
Hey, Eddie, look, we're
plastered all over the paper!
- Hey! Pretty nice!
- What's it say?
- Yeah, what's it say?
- What's it say?
- Yeah, what's it say?
- Shall we tell 'em?
- Shall we?
- By all means.
♪ O'Brien ♪
♪ To Ryan ♪
♪ To Goldberg ♪
♪ What a great double play! ♪
♪ The other team never
can get to score ♪
♪ In every inning ♪
♪ We keep 'em
from winning ♪
♪ Each time that they try
for a rally ♪
♪ That's when we
save the day ♪
♪ Someone's on first,
and the game is in doubt ♪
♪ The guy up at bat
hits a tenable clout ♪
♪ The dust clears away
and they're both of them out ♪
♪ O'Brien ♪
♪ To Ryan ♪
♪ To Goldberg ♪
♪ O'Brien ♪
♪ To Ryan ♪
♪ To Goldberg ♪
♪ Packs 'em into the park ♪
♪ The crowds in the bleachers
are there at dawn ♪
♪ They treat us royal ♪
♪ Gee whiz
but they're loyal ♪
♪ One game lasted 17 innings ♪
♪ It was way after dark ♪
♪ We couldn't see
a darn thing anymore ♪
♪ We thought that the crowd
had gone home good and sore ♪
♪ When out of the black
came a deafening roar ♪
♪ O'Brien to Ryan
to Goldberg ♪
♪ Who is the guy
who scoops up the ball ♪
♪ And whips it
to second base? ♪
♪ O'Brien ♪
♪ O'Brien O'Brien
O'Brien O'Brien ♪
♪ O'Brien O'Brien
O'Brien O'Brien ♪
♪ O'Brien O'Brien
O'Brien O'Brien ♪
♪ O'Brien O'Brien
O'Brien ♪
♪ And who is the guy
who sends on the pill ♪
♪ To first at an awful pace? ♪
♪ Ryan ♪
♪ Ryan Ryan Ryan Ryan ♪
♪ Ryan Ryan Ryan ♪
♪ And who is the guy
who tags 'em at first ♪
♪ With a pitying look
on his face? ♪
♪ Mrs. Goldberg's baby boy ♪
♪ Hi hi hi hi ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Goldberg Goldberg
that's the boy for us ♪
♪ Hi hi hi hi ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ My mother always wanted me
to play the violin ♪
[violin music]
♪ That dainty
little instrument ♪
♪ Just didn't fit my chin ♪
♪ The night of my recital
I played Ich Liebe Du ♪
[violin music]
♪ When suddenly,
a voice rang out ♪
"Hey, throw that cat a fish!"
♪ And then a ripe tomato
was hurled in rude attack ♪
♪ I swung my fiddle wildly
and batted it right back ♪
♪ That moment started off
my new career ♪
♪ And now the sweetest music
to my ear ♪
♪ Is ♪
♪ O'Brien to Ryan
to Goldberg ♪
♪ What they all come to see ♪
♪ Shortstop to second
and then to first ♪
♪ Just 1-2-3,
oh the unholy trio ♪
♪ The way that we move
on the diamond ♪
♪ It is sheer poetry ♪
♪ Winning the games
from the spring to the fall
♪
♪ It's just
all for one ♪
♪ And it's just
one for all ♪
♪ The three musketeers
of the bat and the ball ♪
♪ O'Brien ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ To Ryan ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ To Gold ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Berg ♪
♪ Hey hey! ♪♪
[applause]
[laughter]
Hey, how about a game of
checkers before we hit the
hay?
- Checkers? That's for
firemen.
- Firemen?
That's for ballplayers, too
if you know what's good for you.
I know what's good for me.
Don't lock the door.
I'll be in around 2:00.
Uh, Mike, what's the
fine
for breaking training?
Twenty five dollars. Why?
Well, let's make
it
50, shall we?
The little dears do
need
their rest, you know.
How much money
have you got on you?
Well, in round
figures,
exactly 38 cents.
You?
Checkers.
- I didn't say nothing.
- That's a quarter you owe me.
You know, this
could
go on all season.
- What's eating him, anyway?
- The call of the wild,
junior.
- The call of the wild.
- Oh, that.
Something's gotta be done!
Wow! Hey, fellas!
[clicks
tongue]
Take a look.
[KC humming]
- Beautiful, isn't she?
- Yeah.
Not bad for a dame who can
field a hot grounder.
♪ Dum de da da da dee dum ♪
♪ Dum de da da the crowd ♪
♪ Buy me some peanuts
and Cracker Jack ♪
♪ I don't care
if I never get back ♪
♪ Let me root root root
for the home team ♪
♪ If they don't win
it's a shame ♪
♪ 'Cause it's one two
three strikes you're out ♪
♪ At the old ball game ♪
♪ On two
three strikes you're out ♪
♪ At the old ball game ♪♪
[snaps]
Boys, I've got it.
This is what we do.
First, we..
Hey, fellas!
Come here.
Hey, come here.
There's one way
we can break training
without getting into a jam.
- How's that?
- Take her out on a date.
We'll get two other girls,
and we'll go stepping.
Denny, I've got a hunch
that girl is human.
- No.
- Yes!
And guess who
she's crazy about.
- You!
- Me, personally? You think
so?
Sure, Denny, this is it.
If she's a dame,
she wants romance.
And she's a dame.
Denny, here's your chance.
A touch of the hand,
a subtle caress
a few tender little nothings
whispered in the moonlight.
Aw! Denny, it's up to you.
But I don't know any
tender little nothings, Ed.
It's been my experience
the athletic-type
girl like Higgins
might go
for the caveman approach
like this, "Come here!"
[grunting]
Wham!
Handle her rough, Denny.
Rough, huh?
No. No.
Well, what do you
want me to do?
First go out
on that
balcony.
Let her see you. Then let
nature take its course.
Be nonchalant.
But I don't know
about nonchalant
and things like that.
Oi, sit on the rail.
Look up at the moon.
- Hm?
- Look up at the moon.
Okay. Never mind the moon.
Never mind the moon.
Well, make up your mind.
Attract her attention.
Cough.
[coughing]
Shh! Softly, you dope.
[coughing]
- Hello, Denny!
- Uh, hello, Miss Higgins.
Katherine's the name.
Uh, hello, Katherine.
What do I do next?
What did you say, Denny?
I said, what do I do now..
I mean..
Talk to her.
Say something.
- Go down and talk to her.
- How can I get there?
- Go get down the tree.
- The tree?
The tree. Go down..
Go on. Don't stop now.
[Katherine laughs]
Well!
- Hello, Miss Higgins.
- Katherine.
Katherine. It's a lovely
night,
ain't it?
Yes, it is, Denny.
And that's a great big moon,
ain't it?
Yes, it certainly is.
It's a lovely moon.
How's that?
I said it's a lovely moon.
Oh, yes.
Did you ever stop to think
that a-a lovely night like
this
and a, and a great big moon
and a-a girl like, uh..
The right girl, Denny.
Oh, sure. Sure.
How would you be able
to tell, Denny?
Oh, I could tell.
- Right away?
- Mm-hm.
Right from the very first time.
♪ I'll hear heavenly music ♪
♪ I'll hear bells
start to chime ♪
♪ I'll hear thunder
and I'll be struck with wonder
♪
♪ But I won't have to look
a second time ♪
♪ If her voice is a song ♪
♪ And her walk is a dance ♪
♪ And if her laugh
is warm and free ♪
♪ If I suddenly seem ♪
♪ To be seeing a dream ♪
♪ She's the right girl
for me ♪
♪ If the glow in her eyes
and the light in her smile ♪
♪ Could charm a bird
right off a tree ♪
♪ I'll be charmed as a bird ♪
♪ And I'll know in a word ♪
♪ She's the right girl
for me ♪
♪ She'll have a simple
sweet appeal ♪
♪ That wins my affection ♪
♪ She'll be the kind
who'll make me feel ♪
♪ She needs my protection ♪
♪ If the sight of her face ♪
♪ And the touch of her hand ♪
♪ Can make me happy
as can be ♪
♪ If my heart says come in ♪
♪ Darling where have you been ♪
♪ She's the right girl
for me ♪
♪ She's the right girl ♪
♪ For me ♪♪
That was beautiful,
Denny,
beautiful.
Gee, Miss Higgins,
you're wonderful.
Th-the way you picked up that
grounder was just wonde--
[laughs]
Denny!
Hey! The kid's alright.
Yeah. It's gonna be
a gay social season.
Say, there's some little
red books in my drawer.
Get me volume three.
Volume three.
One...three. Yipe! Wow!
Here, give me that. Now look,
we'll get two other girls.
That'll make it a party of six
till we get to town
then it's every man
for himself.
Let's see now..
Alice, Stella..
Hey, how about Stella?
- Nothing.
- Nothing, huh?
Jessie Davis, I think
she owned a horse and Buggy.
Eddie, I don't think
we're going out
tonight.
What do you mean?
There's the bag.
Come on now. Hit it hard.
- You're out!
- Got you.
See if you can get it.
Hold on a sec. I got it.
- Ooh!
- Out!
Oh, that's fun, Denny
but, gee, it is
getting
a little late.
I think I'd better
be going.
Goodnight.
Of all the stu..
He's probably coming back
for his baseball bat.
What a spot for
a pinch hitter.
Pinch hitter? Oh, no, not me.
I'm poison to her.
We got to get out of
here.
The social season.
The little red
book,
remember?
Attaboy.
She's wonderful!
She's beautiful!
Did you see her figure?
Did we see her figure?
Hey! Wait a minute!
What are you gonna do?
Taking up where you left off!
Fine pal he turned out to be.
Come on.
Quit
worrying.
He's just gonna fix
it up
for you.
He is, Nat? Really?
[humming]
♪ If I suddenly seem
to be seeing a dream ♪
♪ She's the right girl
for me ♪♪
Who is it?
It's me! O'Brien!
May I come up?
I hope you'll pardon me,
Miss Higgins, but I..
Well, there's
something
on my mind, and I..
- Well..
- Yes?
I'd like to
apologize
for, uh, well..
For everything
that's happened,
I..
I've been behaving
like
an idiot, haven't I?
- Yes, you have.
- Mm.
Well, I just wanted
you
to know I was sorry.
- Fine. Was there anything
else?
- What?
'Cause it's getting
kind of late.
Oh, Miss Higgins,
don't go in yet.
- Well, why not?
- Well, uh..
- Don't spoil it.
- Spoil what?
Well, uh, the whole picture.
The-the moonlight on the ocean
and the-the garden and the night
and, uh, you on a balcony.
Why, Mr. O'Brien, you're very
poetic for a shortstop.
Call me Edward.
Edward.
By the way, uh, what will I
call
you, Miss, uh, K.C. Higgins?
[laughs]
Well, no.
What does the K stand for?
- Katherine.
- Katherine? That's nice.
What does the C stand for?
- Catherine.
- Ca..
Two Katherines?
They, uh, couldn't
decide
which way to spell it
so they named you twice.
Oh-ho-ho!
[laughs]
That's right.
You sure they're
talking about me, Nat?
Positive. They're
laughing, aren't
they?
Yeah. The..
Look, uh, Katherine
Catherine,
we're wasting time.
Why don't we go for a stroll
on
the beach in the moonlight?
Well, don't you think
it's a little late?
- No.
- Well, I do.
Oh. Well, uh, how
about
tomorrow night?
Perhaps, but you'd
better go now, huh?
Okay.
Oh, the stairs, please.
[chuckles]
Goodnight.
Goodnight and uh,
sweet dreams, baby doll.
Kissing her hand, the dirty
double-crossing rat!
Calm down, will you?
He's just kissing her for you.
Then what,
I suppose she'll kiss him
then he'll come back
and kiss me, huh?
Well, I know I won't
like it. The dirty..
Oh, Edward!
Yes!
You broke training tonight
just to speak to me.
You risked a fine.
I'd risk my life.
You would?
Well, then, I'm sure
you won't mind.
Mind what?
It's going to cost you
50 bucks, baby doll.
'Goodnight.'
He's only
trying
to help you.
Looks like
he's helping himself.
Wise guy, ain't you?
Trying to beat my time, huh!
- Forget her, will you,
Denny?
- Forget, my eye!
You climbed the wrong
balcony
this time!
- Go away!
- Put up your dukes!
Oh, oh, gee, Denny! Gee, you
walked right into it. I'm--
Hey! What's all this noise
about?
You guys should be in be..
Hey!
- What's the matter with him?
- Well, nothin', I..
They were just showing me
their new vaudeville act.
Yeah, the new vaudeville act.
Yeah.
"Romeo, Romeo, wherefore
art thou, Romeo?" Uh..
"Deny thy father
and refuse thy name.
"If thou wilt not
be but sworn, my love
and I no longer be
a cap.. a cap.."
Go to bed, Goldberg,
and you, too, Juliet!
[dramatic music]
[music continues]
Alright, boys!
That's it! Come on!
[dramatic music]
What's going on
out there, Mike?
Oh, the boys like to
do
a little clowning
once in a while.
They do it before every
game.
The fans eat it up.
[laughing]
Looks like the Senators to me,
Joe. Got the right odds.
Three to two.
I'll take $2,000 worth.
You got it, Nick.
Who's that skinny little runt?
Denny Ryan,
the second baseman.
Gee, he's cute.
And so active
for a little fella.
[crowd laughing]
[whistles]
What you doing?
[dramatic music]
[crowd cheering]
Hey, Denny! Hiya!
Pleased to meet you.
My name's Shirley.
Hey, what's the
matter?
Didn't you like it?
I don't like to mix
clowning with baseball.
Maybe I ought
to give up
baseball
and stick to clowning.
Mr. President, would you
mind posing with this big
stick?
Thank you, sir.
Alright, boys.
De-lighted.
[dramatic music]
Put a nice one
in there now.
[crowd cheering]
Get back! Get back!
Safe!
Alright, nice work, Nat.
Alright!
Hit 'em around now,
boys!
Hit 'em around now!
'Come on, boys!'
Strike.
- Would you like my opinion?
- Play ball!
- Strike.
- Hey! What's the matter?
You blind?
Keep your eyes open!
Watch them, you robber!
Cut it out, O'Brien.
- Cut what out?
- Riding the umpire.
Miss Higgins says
you-you're antagonizing him.
So what? He's an
umpire,
ain't he?
Guess she's afraid
we'll hurt his feelings.
[crowd cheering]
Slide that!
Safe!
That's the old boy!
Way to go!
Now we're going!
He looks like
the winning run.
It's one out, and he's still
a long way from home.
(male #1)
'Alright! Hit 'em around now,
boys! Hit 'em around!'
- Strike!
- What?
O'Brien,
lay off the umpire!
[chuckling]
Oh, so sorry. I almost
lost
my temper, sir.
You'll pardon
the suggestion,
sir
but I have a cousin
in the optical trade
who can get you the
finest
pair of spectacles
wholesale. Bifocals, too.
Play ball!
Yeah, why don't you give that
big mouth of yours a rest?
I beg your pardon, but I was
not
addressing you, stupid.
- Ball!
- Oh, thank you, sir.
Even you could see that.
Come on! Come on!
[indistinct chatter]
Hit the dirt!
- You're out!
- What?
- Boo!
- But I was safe for a mile!
- I say you're out!
- And I say you're a liar.
Of all the dirty, rotten,
low-down decisions
that's the worst
I've ever seen!
- You big, blind robber!
- Are you gonna take that?
Miss Higgins, you don't
belong
on this field.
Umpires always know
best,
Miss Higgins.
You've been calling them
wrong all day
you-you-you big burglar, you!
That's a very
libelous remark, sir.
I don't have to listen to
that.
Get off the field!
You can't put me off!
Oh, yes, you can, can't you?
Get off.
And you're fined
$50.
Well, I'm not going to pay
it,
you crook, you thief!
- You robber--
- Make it a 100.
A $100!
And you keep out of this!
- Hey, you, what did I say?
- Play ball!
Cert-certainly, sir.
- Ball!
- What?
Shut up, you, or I'll
put you off the field, too.
That was right over
the plate.
I couldn't even reach
that
with Teddy's big stick.
Well, you could use it to
match
that big head of yours.
- What did you say?
- You heard me.
Your ears don't lap over.
Your nose don't either,
but I could arrange it.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- Play ball!
Hey! Hey, Ryan!
Come back!
- Yeah!
- Hey, don't..
What do you wanna start
something, buddy?
- Sure!
- Hey!
Knock it off.
Knock it off! Play ball!
[clamoring]
He's hurt!
They'll trample
him!
Jimmy, give me the ball!
You're out!
(Shirley)
Give him air! He's hurt.
Break it up!
Alright, boys, the game is over.
Twenty seven, twenty
eight,
twenty nine..
- There's 3,000.
- Better luck next time,
Joe.
Well, the season's just started.
[laughing]
Well, look who's here!
Easy, now. There.
Poor kid.
He's out
cold.
Here, I'll make him come around.
Why, you!
Gee, I didn't know you were
stuck on the guy.
Who's stuck on him?
I ain't stuck on
him.
It's just
the mother
instinct.
That's what it
is,
the mother
instinct.
Hey, you.
Let me have
that.
Well, he's a nice-looking
little fella.
Bring him over to the cafe
sometime if he ever wakes up.
He's waking up
now.
Denny!
- Denny?
- Mr. Ryan!
Denny, Denny, what happened?
Are you alright?
Who are you, anyway?
- She owns him.
- What?
She owns me, too.
Can you do that?
What, what happened to me?
Who are you?
- Me? I'm--
- She wants to be your mother.
She wants to be my..
I'll have to take it up
with my father.
[laughing]
[instrumental music]
Hey!
♪ It's time
you made your mind up ♪
♪ Not to stall with me ♪
♪ Start playing
ball with me ♪
♪ Your future isn't
changeable or shapeable ♪
♪ It's inescapable ♪
♪ If you should run to China
or to Turkey or Sweden ♪
♪ Or Herzegovina
or Mars ♪
♪ It wouldn't matter
where you'd be ♪
♪ A force would pull
you back to me ♪
♪ It's written
in the stars ♪
♪ It's fate baby
it's fate ♪
♪ And it's knocking
at our door ♪
♪ It's fate baby
and that's the reason ♪
♪ You're mine
and I am yours ♪
♪ Don't wait baby
don't wait ♪
♪ It'll happen anyhow ♪
♪ Don't wait baby
to do next season ♪
♪ What you can do
right now ♪
♪ There's a plan for
every woman and every man ♪
♪ Each was made
for the other ♪
♪ Don't treat me
like a brother ♪
♪ Too late baby
too late ♪
♪ So accept your destiny ♪
♪ It's fate baby ♪
♪ That you were meant
to fall ♪
♪ In love with me ♪
[instrumental music]
♪ I've gone and studied up
on my astrology ♪
♪ I'm really knowledgy ♪
♪ It doesn't matter
if you are Aquarius ♪
♪ Or Sagittarius ♪
♪ Or Gemini or Scorpio
or Taurus the bull ♪
♪ Capricornus or
Pisces the fish ♪
♪ Winter summer
spring or fall ♪
♪ As long as you were
born at all ♪
♪ Mister
you're my dish ♪
♪ It's fate baby
it's fate ♪
♪ Can't I even
put up a fuss? ♪
♪ It's fate baby
the stars have written ♪
♪ That you and me is us ♪
♪ It's right baby
so right ♪
♪ I can see it
in the cards ♪
♪ Don't fight baby
take off that mitten ♪
♪ 'Cause you and me
is pards ♪
♪ Listen Mack it's all
arranged in the zodiac ♪
♪ Got you coming
and going ♪
♪ Hey bud
your future's showing ♪
♪ Too late baby
too late ♪
♪ This feeling in me stirs ♪
♪ It's fate baby
so let's start buying towels
♪
♪ Marked his and hers ♪♪
[train chugging]
[instrumental music]
[crowd cheering]
[train chugging]
[music continues]
[crowd cheering]
[music continues]
[instrumental music]
Yoo-hoo!
Denny! Denny!
Come here. I want
to talk to you.
I'm sorry.
I'm very busy
now.
Why doesn't she
leave me alone?
I got to see
you
just for a
minute.
I can't now.
I'm busy.
Denny, why don't you
talk to the lady?
She ain't no lady, she's been
sending me candy and flowers
and she's been
writing
me and phoning me.
What does she want
from me? Gee whiz!
Hey! you can't drive a horse
up on the sidewalk.
- Denny!
- Shirley.
- You crazy or something?
- You come here, Denny!
What are you, what are you
running away for?
- What's the matter with you?
- She just wants to mother
you.
What, with a whip in her hand?
What are you crazy or
something?
You bad boy, I got a good
notion
to take you on my knee.
You mean over
your knee, don't
you?
I know what I mean.
What do you want
with me, anyway?
I got an invitation for you,
all of you, the whole team!
- Oh?
- You, too, I guess.
An invitation to what?
Joe Lorgan's
throwing a big party
Saturday night after the game,
down at Gibby's Wharf.
And he wants the whole team
to come.
Well, I don't know.
Are you afraid the boys
might enjoy themselves?
Oh, you'll love it.
There will be beer
and food, music
and dancing and clams!
A clambake!
Well, look
away!
- Look away!
♪ Look away! Look away! ♪
♪ It's a lovely day
today in the USA ♪
♪ Like a great big
strawberry shortcake ♪
♪ Or a turkey
on Thanksgiving Day ♪
♪ Like the 4th of July ♪
♪ Or apple pie ♪
♪ It's strictly USA ♪
♪ Like a hot dog
covered with mustard ♪
♪ Or an amateur
hometown play ♪
♪ Like a circus parade ♪
♪ Or lemonade ♪
♪ It's strictly USA ♪
♪ Go to a picnic ♪
♪ Go to a clambake ♪
♪ Go to a barn dance ♪
♪ Or county fair ♪
♪ You'll see
the happy residents ♪
♪ Raising kids to be
the future presidents ♪
♪ Take a man
like Abraham Lincoln ♪
♪ Take a state like Iowa ♪
♪ Take
a sugar-cured ham ♪
♪ A candied yam ♪
♪ Or take your favorite
Uncle Sam ♪
♪ And shout
a big hooray! ♪
♪ It's strictly ♪
♪ USA ♪
♪ You never can
know a country ♪
♪ Till you know
the folks ♪
♪ See 'em in their
native locales ♪
♪ If you want to see young
acorns growing into oaks ♪
♪ You gotta see
the fellas and gals ♪
♪ And as the sweetest
extra-special ♪
♪ Bunch of merchandise ♪
♪ The all-American gal
wins the prize ♪
[tapping]
[instrumental music]
♪ The all-American man
is a hunk of man ♪
♪ He's a handyman
in a pinch ♪
♪ And maybe he can't
make love like Aladdin can ♪
♪ Still he's quite
a guy in a clinch ♪
♪ The all-American fella
wears a coat of high finance ♪
♪ But the all-American girl
wears the pants ♪
[tapping]
♪ Like the bell
on a little red schoolhouse ♪
♪ Or a vote
on election day ♪
♪ Like a brass spittoon
or Daniel Boone ♪
♪ It's strictly USA ♪
Back east,
it's "Hey, bud."
Down south,
it's "Hi, y'all."
Cowboys say "Howdy."
Injuns say "How."
♪ No matter where
you're meetin' folks ♪
♪ It's the real American way
of greetin' folks ♪
♪ Take a gallery
of Bingham ♪
♪ Take an oyster
from Chesapeake bay ♪
♪ Take our ice-cream cones ♪
♪ Or Casey Jones ♪
♪ Take Mr. Tambo
and Mr. Bones ♪
♪ They're really here
to stay ♪
♪ 'Cause it's strictly ♪
♪ USA ♪♪
- Yay!
[cheering]
[instrumental music]
So we're entertaining
a bunch of ballplayers.
Well, I don't get it.
Another thing I don't get
these boys are a cinch
to win the pennant.
You switched and bet
a chunk of dough against them.
Well I happen to like the
odds.
They're 4-to-1.
- Yeah, but they're
unbeatable.
- Yeah.
So was one-round Doug until he
was knocked cold in the second.
You know that fight
was fixed! You, yourself--
You don't say.
You sure need
fattening up.
Oh, I don't
need anything.
Just bones.
She don't feed you
enough, that one.
- What one?
- The one that owns you.
She doesn't own me,
and she feeds me plenty.
Then she ought
to change your formula.
- Is she your girl?
- Yes. No.
I-I mean, I don't know.
If I was your girl,
you'd know.
Some people just
never appreciate.
Appreciate what?
Oh, just appreciate.
You know, Dennis,
come to think of it
she's really not
your type girl at all.
Look, will you do me a
favor
and don't think about it?
She's wonderful.
Sometimes a person thinks
a person is his type of person
and all of a sudden he meets
another type person
who turns out to be
really his type person.
You know what I mean?
No, and I
don't
believe you.
Beside when, when the right one
comes along, I'll know.
I'll wait.
Say, uh, what's
with
you and Denny
or am I too personal?
Well, yes, you
are.
Much too.
Well, I have a reason
for wanting to know
a personal reason.
Oh?
You've been
keeping me awake nights.
I have?
You have.
- Indirectly, of course.
- Well..
Denny talks about you
in his sleep
keeps waking me up.
Oh.
Like last night,
for instance.
All of a sudden,
he woke up yelling
"slide, Katherine, slide."
Denny even dreams
baseball.
He wasn't dreaming
about baseball.
How do you know?
Because when I leaned over
to wake him up
he embraced me, like this..
...and then
he kissed me like this.
You're-you're right.
It couldn't have
been about
baseball.
That's what I said.
(Goldberg)
Okay, Eddie, okay.
Boy, I got to hand it
to you. You win.
Win what, Nat?
Oh, uh, nothing,
Miss Higgins.
Come on, Nat.
What is it? Tell
me.
Oh, something personal
between us.
I bet him a dollar that I'd
kiss
you before the dance was over.
You know something, Eddie?
Sometimes I don't get you.
- Sometimes I don't get
myself.
- What did you tell her for?
- I didn't intend to.
- Then why did you?
Because she's got poor Denny
crazy about her
and she doesn't care
that much about him.
How do you know?
From the way
she kissed me.
Say, uh, you're kind of
mixed-up, ain't you, fella?
Yeah. kind of.
[instrumental music]
- Gee. At last.
- At last what, Denny?
Oh, you know, Katherine.
You must know.
Oh, no-no, Denny.
Please.
Honest, Katherine, from the
minute you picked that grounder
and threw to third,
I-I knew it was love.
- No, Denny.
- No?
I-It's just that I don't want
you to build up any false
hopes.
I like you very
much,
Denny, but, well..
Oh, you mean, maybe
when the season's over, huh?
Or after
we win the pennant?
Well, we'll-we'll
talk about it then.
Oh, good.
Denny, Denny,
will you do me a favor?
Well, sure.
Will you kiss me
right now, hard?
Kiss you now?
Here? Now?
Right here.
No kick in it, huh?
No. I'm sorry, Denny.
I'm really sorry.
Oh, sure, it's
alright.
I understand.
Sometimes a person
thinks a person
is her type of
person,
and all of a sudden
she finds that-that person's
really not her type of person
but another one
is her type of
person.
It doesn't always
work that way, Denny.
- It doesn't always work?
- Mm-mmm.
What are you doing
spying on me?
Who's spying?
I was just
watching.
Some people just
never appreciate.
Come here, you.
Well, come here.
Kiss me.
[music continues]
Have any kick in it?
Uh-huh.
Good.
I was beginning
to worry a little bit.
[music continues]
Hello, Shirley.
Hi.
[music continues]
[applause]
Oh, Dennis, you shouldn't
have kissed me
in front of all
these people.
Look.
[instrumental music]
Hey, what's wrong with
Mrs. O'Briens boy Eddie?
Heart trouble. It looks like
heart trouble to me.
Sure, what kind of an Irish
lad
that can sit here
while fiddlers are fiddling,
fifes are fifing
and colleens smiling
like it was their wedding
night?
Well, you should be
leaping in the air
knocking your heels together!
Doing the handsome proud.
Come on.
- Come on!
- This way..
[music continues]
[tapping]
[laughing]
Go to it,
Michael, me boy!
Fine, fine.
The Gilhulys were the greatest
dancers in all Ireland!
[claps]
[music continues]
This is the step
me uncle taught me
the night of the big wind.
[crowd cheering]
Now you can see
why the O'Briens
were the first kings
of Ireland.
[cheering]
Little hoofer,
that O'Brien.
Not a bad shortstop,
either.
Ah, that infield
wouldn't be
much good without him.
[instrumental music]
Where did you
get that hat?
Where did you
get that hat?
♪ Where did you
get that hat? ♪
♪ Where did you
get that hat? ♪
♪ Folks ask me every day ♪
♪ Isn't it a nifty one
you often hear them say ♪
♪ Put it on it's funny ♪
♪ Can't you see
the people smile? ♪
♪ It keeps me busy
tellin' them ♪
♪ The history
of this tile ♪
♪ It's the hat ♪
♪ Me dear old father wore ♪
♪ Upon St. Patrick's day ♪
♪ Now talk about respect ♪
♪ With his head erect ♪
♪ As he marched down
old Broadway ♪
♪ Sure not a man in line
looked half as fine ♪
♪ Me dear old mother
used to say ♪
♪ As your father did
in his old-time lid ♪
♪ Upon St. Patrick's day ♪
♪ It's the hat
me dear old father wore ♪
♪ Upon St. Patrick's day ♪
♪ Talk about respect ♪
♪ With his head erect ♪
♪ As he marched down
old Broadway ♪
♪ Sure not a man in line
looked half as fine ♪
♪ Me dear old mother
used to say ♪
♪ As your ♪
♪ Father did
in his old-time lid ♪
♪ Upon St. Patrick's day ♪
Hey!
[instrumental music]
[tapping]
[instrumental music]
♪ It's the hat
me dear old father wore ♪
♪ Upon St. Patrick's day ♪
♪ Talk about respect ♪
♪ With his head erect ♪
♪ As he marched down
old Broadway ♪
♪ Not a man in line
looked half as fine ♪
♪ Me dear old mother
used to say ♪
♪ Than your father did
in his old-time lid ♪
♪ Upon St. Patrick's day ♪♪
[tapping]
[music continues]
[crowd cheering]
What a wonderful night.
What a wonderful clambake.
The most wonderful
clambake there ever was.
Yeah. Wonderful.
What's eating you?
Oh, as if I didn't
know.
Look, I told you, I'm not
interested in Katherine.
You got a clear
field.
She's not my type.
She's not my type, either.
Forget it.
Sure, I'll forget it
but you
can't
forget it.
Why don't you
quit
fighting it, Ed?
After all, Katherine
is beautiful and
smart--
And she's got
a great throwing arm.
Great throwing arm?
You just didn't
look
any further.
Remember the night we saw her
swimming in the pool?
- Remember?
- No.
"No," he says.
In that gold
bathing suit.
Mmm..
Hey, you're drooling.
[chuckles]
Yeah, but Shirley 's my type.
Yeah, she's kind of
timid
and sort of shy.
You should have seen me
sweep her off her feet.
That's what they
like,
the rough stuff.
Yes, siree. You got
to treat them rough.
Cave man stuff.
Yeah. They like
that cave man
stuff.
So she hits me over the head
with her own club
slings me over
her shoulder
carries me out of the cave
into the woods.
Then what did you do?
I don't know.
I was unconscious.
You dope, you missed
the best part of the
dream.
You think so?
[knock on door]
- Good morning.
- Oh, hello, boys.
Hello, Mr. Lorgan,
how are you?
Fine. I'd like to have
a little chat with you,
Eddie.
Say, I'm gonna get a newspaper.
I'll be back in few minutes.
Oh, would you have a
chair,
Mr. Lorgan?
- Oh, thanks.
- What's on your mind?
You know, I liked the way
you handled yourself
last night at the clambake.
Yes, sir,
I liked it a lot.
Oh, thank you, Mr. Lorgan,
but what are you leading up
to?
Oh, a job.
I'm thinking of
opening up a cafe
big, swanky place
for the carriage trade.
You know, I could use
you in the show.
Gee, that's swell,
but, uh, what about
Dennis?
He's my partner, you know.
Oh, I think
we can work that out.
Good. How much
will you pay?
Well, you've been getting
a lot of publicity lately.
I can double your last
Vaudeville salary.
- It's a deal.
- Good. When can you start?
Well, not until after
the baseball season's
over.
Oh, not till then?
Oh, no, you don't think I
could
walk out now, do you?
We practically got
the pennant
cinched.
Well, I'm not interested
in baseball.
You see, I got a big chorus
of girls waiting
ready to start to rehearse.
Thirty of them.
Gee, 30 girls.
Yeah. A bevy of beauties.
Well, I'm sorry
you can't make it.
Oh, wait a minute. Look.
Couldn't you hold
off
for a while?
The baseball
season's
practically over.
I'll tell you
what I'll do.
Well, you gonna be
in town for a while?
Sure. The season
finishes here.
Well, couldn't you arrange
to get away
at nights for rehearsals?
No, no, I couldn't do that.
Well, then there's no use
in talking anymore.
- So long, Eddie.
- Wait a minute!
Look, I'll do it, but..
I'll do it,
but keep it quiet, will
you?
Oh, sure. I wouldn't want
to get you in a jam.
I'll tell you what I'll do,
I'll call you tomorrow.
And let you know
when we start rehearsals.
- Yeah.
- So long.
So long.
- So long, fellas.
- So long.
How do you know
it will work?
With Eddie?
Oh, it's a cinch.
You just see his face
when I told him
there were going to be
30 chorus girls, 30 of them?
[laughs]
Look what one dame
did to a guy named Samson.
Who was he, a fighter?
So, you see, I'm all set.
I'll get the act framed
and then when
the season's over, you're
in.
Of course, I'll have
to sneak out every
night.
You'll cover up
for me, won't
you?
What else can I do?
I'm your pal, ain't I?
Attaboy.
You can't rehearse all night
and play ball the next day,
Eddie.
Why, with a few bad breaks,
we can lose the pennant.
Quit worrying, will
you?
I can handle it.
I'm in great shape.
[instrumental music]
[crowd booing]
[music continues]
Pass me the milk,
will you, Ed?
"Wolves continue slump
in game with Chicago.
"The wolves dropped another
game today to Chicago
"who swept
to a 6-5
victory
"aided by a flurry
of last-inning hits
and three
startling
errors by.."
By shortstop
Eddie O'Brien!
Go ahead. Read it!
What's gotten into him,
anyway?
The kid's lost his pep,
no coordination, no zip.
He plays like
a tired old man.
Ah, he ain't tired.
He's been hitting the
hay
early every night.
In fact, too early.
Yes, that's very
unusual for O'Brien.
- I should say so.
- Something's eating him.
Well, what do the other boys
say? Have they got any ideas?
Well, no, not exactly.
Well, come on.
What is it?
Oh, it's
nothing.
It's nothing.
Look, boys, if O'Brien
stays in this slump
we can kiss
the pennant good-bye.
So, if you have any ideas,
open up. Come on.
Tell her, Slappy.
Well, uh, it's really
got two angles, see?
You, well, you
take,
like, a racehorse.
He's going great,
winning every out
but all of a sudden, well,
he really starts looking
around.
He's getting restless. See?
What has O'Brien
got to be restless about?
Well, it's like Slappy says
you take that racehorse.
When he starts
looking around
he's looking
at another nag.
Yeah. With a
ribbon
in her hair.
That sounds like
a pretty silly reason
for losing ball games
but if O'Brien wants
to chase the girls, let him.
Who's stopping him?
As long as he keeps
decent hours.
Well? Oh, oh, yes.
That other angle.
What else is bothering
our little racehorse?
- You.
- Me?
Miss Higgins,
you're the other
nag.
- I'm the--
- Hm-hmm.
Really?
Oh, so you want me
to play up to O'Brien
so we'll win the pennant,
is that it?
Can you think of
a better reason?
No. No, of course not.
But personally,
I'm-I'm only interested
in his batting average.
Look, Joe, I can't
rehearse all night
and play ball
in the afternoon.
I need some rest.
You gotta get
someone else, Joe. I'm
through.
You'll have
all next week to rest up.
I don't care what it's doing
to your ball-playing!
I gotta get this show set!
And I got to play baseball!
I feel like a heel
letting the team down, Joe.
That pennant means
extra dough to those guys.
Listen, I don't like
that kind of talk.
Don't threaten me, Joe!
No! I'm not coming down,
not tonight or any night!
I think that boy needs
a little talking-to.
- Hello, Eddie.
- Oh, hiya.
Uh, what's your hurry?
Well, I'm tired.
I'm gonna hit the hay.
Eddie, wait a minute.
Let-let's have
a little talk,
huh?
Just you and me.
Come on, Eddie.
Look, if it's about
my batting average
there's nothing left
to talk about.
That's why I want
to get some sleep.
Well, that's just it, Eddie.
M-maybe you're getting
too much sleep.
That can happen, too,
you know.
You see,
it's this way, Eddie.
You're, well,
you're just like a horse
I mean, a racehorse.
You're all nerves,
you're too finely trained
and, all of a sudden,
after you win a race
well, you start
looking around.
Yeah? What am I looking at?
Well, don't you know?
It's a long time since
I've been a racehorse.
Well, anyway, Eddie,
what I'm trying to say
is that well,
maybe you're getting restless.
You should relax more
uh, get out and just
bust out, you know?
I-I really think it might
do you some good.
Uh, get yourself
a girl, maybe
and just bust out.
Uh-huh.
And, uh, what
girl
am I gonna
bust out with?
Well, I don't know
but well, if you can't find one
there-there's always me.
You?
You want to go
out
with me?
You're asking me?
I-i-it's for the team.
Well, sure. The team.
Your-your batting average,
you know.
Sure. I know.
You-you've been making errors.
- Am I making one now?
- Unh-unh.
Oh, Miss Higgins
you're the prettiest
manager in baseball.
You're certainly
the prettiest shortstop.
Oh, I've been
a foul ball up to
now
but it's all gonna
be
different from here
in.
Goodnight,
Miss
Higgins.
Well, Eddie, wait.
Don't-don't you want
to bust out?
Right now, all that
counts
is winning that
pennant.
I'll take a rain
check
on the other.
Oh, I'm gonna
lay that
pennant
right at your feet.
Baby, when I do,
we're going to bust
out
in every town
in this
league.
Oh, Eddie.
Hello, Eddie. Well,
I hope I'm not intruding.
Good evening,
Miss Higgins.
Look, honey, run along, will
you? I'll see you tomorrow.
So, this is why you had to
miss the rehearsal tonight,
huh?
I thought you said
you needed a rest.
Rehearsal?
What's he talking about,
Eddie?
- Doesn't she know?
- Honey, I'll tell you
tomorrow.
Why, he's been
rehearsing
every night
for the past
couple weeks.
Rehearsing every night?
Yes, for a show
that I'm putting
on.
Oh, the girls are
gonna
miss you tonight.
They need you badly, Eddie.
- The girls?
- Listen, Katherine.
I'll explain
all this tomorrow.
From now on,
they can have him
and the team can
get along without him
for the rest of the season.
Personally, I can
get along without him
for the rest of my life.
Well, I guess I can get along
without you, too, Eddie,
from now on.
Oh, it's beginning to
penetrate my thick skull.
You must have bet a big chunk
of dough against the Wolves.
[chuckles]
The little boy's
beginning to get smart.
So you played me
for a sucker,
huh?
Well, I had to protect
my investment.
I guess there's no point
in me giving you the
routine
about baseball
being
a great game.
We gotta keep it clean,
especially for the kids.
No. You'd just be
wasting your time.
That's what I thought.
[grunting]
Come on!
[intense music]
[kids clamoring]
[thud]
[kids clamoring]
[instrumental music]
[indistinct]
[music continues]
[whistles]
[instrumental music]
Alright, folks! Get a program
before the game starts!
Programs! Programs!
We want O'Brien!
- Louder.
- We want O'Brien!
We want O'Brien!
This is the guy
they need in there.
(male #1)
'No. He went
all to pieces.'
What do you mean,
all to pieces?
Anybody's entitled to a slump
once in a while.
Hey! Look!
- We want O'Brien!
- Louder.
We want O'Brien!
It's Eddie O'Brien,
fellas! Right here!
[clamoring]
Why don't get in there
and play, Eddie?
Nobody asked me.
I can't walk out--
We'll carry you
if it'll do any good.
- Yeah!
[clamoring]
Holy smokes!
Look, it's Eddie.
Hey, Eddie!
What do you know?
That-a boy, Eddie!
What are you going
to do about him, Miss
Higgins?
Nothing. There's
nothing to be done.
It wouldn't hurt
to talk to him.
Mike, there's nothing
to talk about.
Besides, he's probably in
no condition to play anyhow.
Why don't you
put him out there and
see?
Yeah, we have plenty of
time
before the game starts.
No!
But you can talk to him
if you want to.
Attaboy,
Eddie!
Get in there!
If he goes in, we can
kiss our 20,000 good-bye.
Ah, you fellas
give up too easy.
What are you talking
about? What 20,000?
Have you boys been
betting against--
Shut up!
O'Brien mustn't
play today, boys.
- That's it.
- Okay.
A change in the line-up
for today's game!
O'Brien at shortstop
for the Wolves!
[crowd applauding]
Denny.
Denny, come here.
Hi, honey.
What are you doing here?
Listen, they're
going to get
him.
- Get who?
- Eddie.
- They're out to get him.
- What?
I heard Lorgan
and his men
talking.
They bet a lot of
money
against the Wolves.
They're a bad lot, Denny.
They won't stop at
anything.
You got to tell
Eddie not to
play.
Oh, he'd play anyway.
You got to stop
him
from playing.
Sure, sure.
Stop him from playing.
Yeah. Yeah,
I'll stop him.
Hey, Ed, pal.
How about giving them
the old routine? The gag?
Sure. You got the softball?
- Right there.
- Let's go! Come on!
[clamoring]
[applauding]
[instrumental music]
[thud]
[people laughing]
[whistles]
[mouthing]
(Eddie)
'Come on.
Let me have it.'
Hurry up.
Let me have it.
[instrumental music]
[laughing]
[applause]
Eddie! Eddie!
Hey, fellas, come here!
- You alright? Eddie!
- Get a doctor!
So our boy was really hurt.
Yeah, what do you know?
- I'm Dr. Winston.
- Come on, right here, doc.
Open up, boys. Come on.
Better get him
to the locker room right
away.
- Get him up.
- Take him easy, now.
- Go ahead.
- Nice and easy, boys.
Take it easy.
Nice and easy.
Well, I guess there's
ain't nothing left for us to
do.
Well, wait. Maybe he's only
stunned for a few minutes.
We gotta keep him out.
- Karl, Steve.
- Yeah?
They don't know you two,
go down there
tell them you're couple
of doctors
and keep O'Brien out.
- He'll be out, Joe.
- Okay.
Take it easy now, boys.
- Put him right down here.
- Careful. Very careful.
Give me room, boys.
Give me room.
- I'm Dr. Karl.
- I'm Dr. Stevens.
- How is he?
- Can't be sure yet.
- May be a concussion.
- A concussion?
So you fellas better
get out of here.
- We can take care of him.
- Alright, boys.
- Back in the field.
- Come on, Miss Higgins.
He'll be alright.
I don't suppose you have
a stethoscope with you?
Just cut me short, doc.
Say, why don't you run
along?
We don't all
have to be here.
Well, thank you very much.
I would like to see the game.
- Hmm..
- Well, what is it?
Uh? Oh, it's 10
minutes
after 2:00, doc.
Run along, doc, will you
and enjoy the game.
That's a nice fellow.
[groaning]
Say, he's a light
sleeper,
ain't he?
Yeah.
- Call it.
- Heads.
You win.
[instrumental music]
He's safe.
[music continues]
[thud]
[crowd cheering]
He's safe!
- How is he?
- Them doctors won't let me
in.
They say they may have
to operate.
What?
Denny, Denny, what's this
about gambling?
Who said anything
about gambling?
- Shirley did.
- Shirley, you didn't--
Now don't you start that.
I know you knocked him out,
you did it on purpose.
Now, look, I was on a spot.
Now you don't want a dead
shortstop on your hands, do
you?
Why didn't you call the cops?
They're all over the place.
I was too scared to.
Why didn't you tell
me?
How did I know you were gonna
bean him with a hard ball?
Oh, Denny!
Mike, how's he?
Have you seen him?
No, but he's still out.
Them two doctors
won't let me in.
They're saying they're
gonna operate.
Operate! In-in
there?
That's impossible!
Well, that's what
they're saying.
Well, I'm going in there!
Gee, is it that bad?
You hit him next time, will
you?
My knuckles is getting sore.
Hey, you can't come in here.
Why not?
Doctor's orders,
and I'm the doctor.
This man's been hurt
very bad.
Now shut the door
and get out of here.
Those two aren't doctors.
Come on! Quick!
(Karl)
'You can't come in here!'
[clamoring]
[grunting]
[whistling]
[people clamoring]
[thud]
Run it out!
Stay, stay.
Hold it! Hold it! Hold it!
- Get back!
- He's safe!
- Good boy, old boy.
- Alright, watch his pitch.
There they are, officers!
Come on, now!
Wait a minute, Joe!
What's your hurry?
Stop him!
Somebody, stop him!
Denny, stop him!
Just a second.
Buddy.
[all gasping]
Oh, why, I
hardly
touched him.
I guess I don't
know
my own strength.
Take him away, fellas.
Come on, boys.
Alright, boys! Play ball!
Batter up!
Denny! Denny, come on,
get in there, kid.
Get in there, kid.
Send Goldberg around!
- Slappy, is he still out?
- Yeah.
I don't think he's
seriously
hurt, Miss Higgins.
He's merely stunned.
Eddie, darling.
Darling, please look at me.
Oh, Eddie, can you talk?
How do you feel?
I feel fine.
- Oh, darling.
- I feel wonderful.
Now, you just lie right here
and don't you move.
Who's moving?
Oh, darling,
I was so worried
when Dennis hit your,
the head with the ball.
Dennis!
Where is he?
Move it, I'll murder him!
I'll kill him!
- Eddie! Eddie, wait!
- Let me go!
He did it on purpose!
No, Eddie! He
didn't!
Oh, Eddie!
[instrumental music]
[thud]
Get in there, boy.
Get in there.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Where is he?
Let me at him!
I want him!
I'll tear him apart!
Alright, get a hit!
You can catch him!
Yeah! Yeah! Give me a bat!
Give me a bat!
[instrumental music]
Honest, Eddie, I can
explain the whole thing.
Let's go, Eddie!
Come on, Eddie!
[instrumental music]
[thud]
[dramatic music]
Eddie! Eddie, stop!
Stop!
- Wait! Eddie, stop!
- Eddie!
Eddie, wait!
Eddie!
[people cheering]
♪ Keep your seats
hold your hats ♪
♪ It's not the finish
of the show ♪
♪ The love scene
must be played out ♪
♪ Before
the final fade-out ♪
♪ Sinatra gets Garrett ♪
♪ Kelly gets Williams ♪
♪ For that's the plot
the author wrote ♪
♪ So turn this duet
into a quartet ♪
♪ And end it
on a happy note ♪
[tapping]
♪ Like a Philadelphia
scrapple ♪
♪ Like a Washington expose ♪
♪ Like the St. Louis blues
or the Dallas news ♪
♪ It's strictly USA ♪
♪ Like a Saturday night
on main street ♪
♪ Like a Ford or a Chevrolet ♪
♪ Like potato chips
or comic strips ♪
♪ It's strictly USA ♪
♪ Take Judy Garland ♪
♪ Take Kathryn Grayson ♪
♪ Take Mr. Crosby ♪
♪ Or Fred Astaire ♪
♪ Don't let the movie
set them up ♪
♪ 'Cause they look so pretty
when we pin 'em up ♪
♪ Like the annual
Elks convention ♪
♪ Like a Rotary Club soiree ♪
♪ Like masonic halls
or firemen's balls ♪
♪ Like honeymooning
at Niagara falls ♪
♪ They're really
here to stay ♪
♪ 'Cause it's strictly ♪
♪ USA ♪♪
[instrumental music]