1
00:00:02,461 --> 00:00:04,421
DUNCAN: "It's laughter we're after"?
2
00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:06,585
That's the best
college boy could come up with?
3
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:07,803
No, no, no.
4
00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:09,513
I can do better. Okay. Okay.
5
00:00:09,593 --> 00:00:11,093
How about, "Making kids laugh
6
00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:13,428
"is the contractual responsibility
of our staff"?
7
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:14,564
Ah? (CHUCKLES)
8
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,430
I got a better one for ya, four eyes.
How about this?
9
00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:18,808
"Laughter lights up your life
10
00:00:18,894 --> 00:00:22,444
"like an oxyacetylene blowtorch
with a multi-flame tip." Ow!
11
00:00:22,523 --> 00:00:24,613
Thank you. You're welcome.
12
00:00:25,317 --> 00:00:27,527
Mom, you didn't need to drive me.
I could've walked.
13
00:00:27,611 --> 00:00:30,111
I wanted to make sure
your second day started better.
14
00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:33,657
-I know, I get it. It's okay. Stop it.
-Just hold on a second. Here we go.
15
00:00:33,742 --> 00:00:36,872
-Stop! Mom...
-That's my little baby behemoth.
16
00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:39,374
I've got a plan.
Comedy class on my lunch breaks,
17
00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:41,246
and I'm gonna get on that Laugh Floor.
18
00:00:41,333 --> 00:00:45,963
This whole crazy MIFT thing
is just a temporary nightmare. Okay?
19
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,546
The Monsters Inc. Facilities Team?
20
00:00:47,631 --> 00:00:49,551
They can't be
as weird as you said they were.
21
00:00:49,633 --> 00:00:53,143
-Mom, I...
-FRITZ: MIFTer! MIFTer!
22
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:56,890
What's that I hear?
Oh, it's the call of the fledgling MIFTer.
23
00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:58,394
-Oh, boy.
-VAL: What's up, MIFToid?
24
00:00:58,475 --> 00:01:00,435
MIFTonian. MIFTied. MIFTerone.
25
00:01:00,519 --> 00:01:03,609
-Yeah, we get it.
-And who is this lovely lady?
26
00:01:03,689 --> 00:01:05,189
Thank you. That's enough. We get it.
27
00:01:05,274 --> 00:01:06,864
You didn't tell me you had a sister.
28
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:08,532
It's my mom.
29
00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:11,860
-Enchanté, Tylor's very sister-like Mom.
-(MILLIE GIGGLES)
30
00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:14,487
Mama Tuskmon? So nice to meet you.
31
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:17,195
I'm Val, Tylor's old college buddy
and new BFF.
32
00:01:17,286 --> 00:01:18,286
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
33
00:01:18,370 --> 00:01:20,080
-This is Val. This is Fritz.
-Enchanté.
34
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:22,293
Everyone's met. We're good.
And you know what?
35
00:01:22,374 --> 00:01:24,214
Why don't I just see you guys inside?
36
00:01:24,293 --> 00:01:27,343
Oh, you bet you're gonna see us inside.
37
00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:29,208
Why are you blinking?
38
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:30,298
That was a wink
39
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:34,012
because of the subtext
of what comes next inside.
40
00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,104
Wink-wink.
41
00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:36,429
(FRITZ AND VAL GIGGLING)
42
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:38,393
MIFTer! MIFTer!
43
00:01:38,473 --> 00:01:41,103
Okay, I'll admit it. They're weird.
44
00:01:41,185 --> 00:01:43,185
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
45
00:02:13,884 --> 00:02:17,304
Hey, guys, that thing out front just now
with the winking and the blinking,
46
00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:21,727
bird calls, the super weird vibe
with my mom...
47
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,638
(STUTTERS)
48
00:02:23,727 --> 00:02:24,727
Hello?
49
00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:28,074
Hello? Anybody?
50
00:02:29,233 --> 00:02:30,733
(GROWLS)
51
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:34,196
FRITZ: MIFTer!
52
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:38,279
MIFTer!
53
00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:43,621
MIFTer!
54
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:49,632
MIFTer!
55
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:50,801
(CHUCKLES)
56
00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:52,835
Hello?
57
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:55,631
(DOOR CLOSES)
58
00:02:57,135 --> 00:03:00,215
FRITZ: Young neophyte
Handy of duct tape
59
00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:04,685
Swift of repair
I welcome you to MIFT
60
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,599
Yes, MIFT.
61
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,858
Since the day
Monsters Incorporated was founded,
62
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:13,400
there was a need,
a need for monsters behind the monsters.
63
00:03:13,485 --> 00:03:14,945
The unsung heroes.
64
00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:17,321
ALL: M-I-F-T.
65
00:03:17,406 --> 00:03:19,366
If a part breaks, we fix it.
66
00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:22,449
If a machine needs maintenance,
we maintain it.
67
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:25,116
This elite squad
of polished professionals,
68
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,745
each of them an expert in their fields.
69
00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,083
They are the girdles...
70
00:03:29,168 --> 00:03:30,248
-"Girdles"?
-Girders.
71
00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:31,415
-Griddles...
-"Griddles"?
72
00:03:31,503 --> 00:03:33,213
...upon which the factory stands.
73
00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:34,627
And it's a very big factory.
74
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:35,875
Sorry, I'm not sure I...
75
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:39,716
But before we proceed,
a few last words from our initiate.
76
00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,183
Oh, oh.
77
00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:42,763
This is an initiation ceremony.
78
00:03:42,848 --> 00:03:44,928
Hey, guys,
this is all just temporary. So...
79
00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,687
-So you're leaving?
-In a cardboard tube, most likely.
80
00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:50,149
Just like Rodney
after that hydraulic press incident.
81
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,520
Flat Rodney.
82
00:03:51,607 --> 00:03:53,687
-VAL: Coming through!
-FRITZ: Behold,
83
00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:57,445
you will now signify your readiness
for everlasting membership.
84
00:03:57,529 --> 00:03:58,609
-"Everlasting"?
-VAL: Yeah!
85
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:01,447
Your first sacred tool.
86
00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:02,783
(TOOL WHIRRING)
87
00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:05,621
Ah, that's where I left it.
88
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:12,745
-Tylor, I beseech you, wrench the nut.
-Uh...
89
00:04:12,836 --> 00:04:17,046
-Wrench the nut.
-ALL: Wrench the nut.
90
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:19,892
What kind of nut are we talking about?
'Cause I have an allergy.
91
00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:21,388
-FRITZ: Wrench the nut.
-I don't...
92
00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:22,470
No, no nuts. I don't want...
93
00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:24,144
I want nothing to do with this nut.
94
00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,272
ALL: Wrench the nut.
95
00:04:26,350 --> 00:04:27,350
Okay, fine, fine, fine.
96
00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:29,394
If it'll make you stop chanting, (SIGHS)
97
00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:30,898
I'll wrench the nut.
98
00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:34,016
-ALL: Wrench the nut.
-TYLOR: Okay.
99
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:37,947
ALL: Wrench the nut. Wrench the nut.
100
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:39,028
-Uh...
-FRITZ: Wrench...
101
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,112
CUTTER: Uh-oh.
102
00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:44,240
(NUT CLATTERS)
103
00:04:57,381 --> 00:04:58,381
Good enough.
104
00:04:58,966 --> 00:05:01,466
You have now endured
the ordeal of the nut,
105
00:05:01,552 --> 00:05:03,802
and you will cross over into MIFThood.
106
00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:06,057
-I don't wanna cross anything.
-Young tenderfoot,
107
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,269
cross through the door
of eternal membership.
108
00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:09,890
"Eternal." No, that sounds long.
109
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:12,347
Guided by the candle
of infinite commitment
110
00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:13,607
and be cleansed
111
00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:16,279
-by the flames of no return!
-"Flames"?
112
00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:18,028
I love this part!
113
00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:22,034
(EXHALES)
114
00:05:22,114 --> 00:05:23,574
We used to use real flames.
115
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,907
Until Carl took a misstep to the right.
116
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,123
Lit up like the sun.
117
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:30,042
Catastrophic, yet beautiful.
118
00:05:30,122 --> 00:05:33,042
This is crazy, okay?
Your ceremony is crazy.
119
00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:34,875
As long as we're throwing out crazy ideas,
120
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,800
I got one for you guys. I'm gonna leave.
121
00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:40,419
You're on your way
to a lifelong membership in MIFT.
122
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,178
-No! No! No!
-FRITZ: Do not feel unworthy!
123
00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:44,760
Cross through the door!
124
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:46,925
-ALL: Cross through the door!
-I don't wanna do this.
125
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:49,734
No, no. No "door."
No "cross." No! No "eternal."
126
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:52,978
Cross over and become...
127
00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:54,271
One of us!
128
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:58,613
FRITZ: Oh, another power outage.
129
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,862
And just when it was getting good.
130
00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:02,454
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
131
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:03,609
This keeps happening.
132
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:05,867
That's the second
power outage today, Sulley.
133
00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:08,989
All the jokesters we have
are working multiple shifts.
134
00:06:09,077 --> 00:06:10,447
(YELPS AND GRUNTS)
135
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:11,747
You got this, Phlegm!
136
00:06:11,830 --> 00:06:14,040
Thanks, Celia. (GROANS)
137
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:15,875
(BELL DINGS)
138
00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,629
Another Laugh Canister filled. (SIGHS)
139
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,802
Have a seat. How you doing, champ?
140
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:22,261
Rinse! Swish!
141
00:06:22,341 --> 00:06:24,761
I tell ya, you're a comedy tank.
Comedy tank!
142
00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:27,603
When it comes to humor,
you throw no punch lines, Mr. Wazowski.
143
00:06:27,679 --> 00:06:29,519
Spit! You throw no punch lines!
144
00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:32,388
Now let's get you out there
for the next round.
145
00:06:32,476 --> 00:06:34,056
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
146
00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,984
You've been at this 18 hours straight.
147
00:06:36,063 --> 00:06:38,153
-You need to take a break.
-Ah! "A break"?
148
00:06:38,232 --> 00:06:40,692
Sulley, I am personally
powering Monstropolis.
149
00:06:40,776 --> 00:06:43,606
First place, second place... fourth place?
150
00:06:43,695 --> 00:06:47,025
Uh, that Lanky and his spinning bowtie.
151
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,865
We'll see who gets the last laugh, Lanky.
152
00:06:49,952 --> 00:06:53,372
Mike, you need to relax.
Let the others handle it for a while.
153
00:06:53,455 --> 00:06:55,535
I'm fine. I gotta keep the kids laughing.
154
00:06:55,624 --> 00:06:56,964
I got a gift, Sulley.
155
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,842
You do not hide a gift like mine
156
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:02,919
from my tiny, adoring friends.
157
00:07:03,006 --> 00:07:04,216
(SNORING)
158
00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:06,219
If you're gonna keep the kids laughing,
159
00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:08,181
we'd better get you some coffee.
160
00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:13,636
Okay.
161
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:16,811
Creamer, sugar.
162
00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:19,605
Sugars. Creamers, stir sticks.
No stir sticks.
163
00:07:19,690 --> 00:07:20,940
Where is it?
164
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:23,494
(GRUNTS)
165
00:07:29,575 --> 00:07:30,655
(GROANS)
166
00:07:30,742 --> 00:07:32,622
There you go. That'll help.
167
00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:34,201
(GULPS)
168
00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:37,498
Yeah, that's horrible.
(SMACKS LIPS AND GROANS)
169
00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:39,423
Tastes like someone's finger.
170
00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:41,421
Uh. That's weird.
171
00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:42,753
Well, thanks, Sulley.
172
00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:44,008
-ROZE: Wazowski!
-(GASPS)
173
00:07:44,089 --> 00:07:48,589
Better not fall asleep
in your comedy class.
174
00:07:48,677 --> 00:07:51,307
That's right.
I'm teaching comedy class at lunch.
175
00:07:51,388 --> 00:07:53,598
Mike, you can't keep going like this.
176
00:07:53,682 --> 00:07:55,432
Actually, he can, Mr. Sullivan,
177
00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:59,017
with a little something called
36 1/2 Hour Energy drink.
178
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,404
Yeah. Me and Needleman drink two of those
179
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,781
when we run out of our
73 Hour Energy drink.
180
00:08:03,859 --> 00:08:07,199
It's twice as good
as the 18 1/4 Hour Energy drink.
181
00:08:07,279 --> 00:08:08,279
Yeah? I don't know.
182
00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:11,783
Thirty-six-and-a-half hours sounds like
a lot of energy for such a little...
183
00:08:11,867 --> 00:08:12,867
Hmm. (SMACKS LIPS)
184
00:08:17,539 --> 00:08:18,709
Wow.
185
00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:21,340
And now,
the moment you've been waiting for.
186
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:24,458
-Haven't been waiting.
-Tylor, this is your desk.
187
00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:26,756
-Lucky.
-Isn't this your break table?
188
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,680
-This table...
-Which is everybody's table.
189
00:08:28,759 --> 00:08:30,639
...will double as your very own desk.
190
00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,559
And what desk wouldn't be complete
191
00:08:33,639 --> 00:08:35,679
-without your very own nameplate?
-Yes!
192
00:08:35,766 --> 00:08:37,636
-You get...
-Complimentary Drooler Cooler.
193
00:08:37,768 --> 00:08:38,978
Real drool in every drop.
194
00:08:39,061 --> 00:08:41,481
-"I gift MIFT" coffee mug.
-VAL: That used to be mine.
195
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:43,983
-A picture of yourself.
-And me.
196
00:08:44,066 --> 00:08:45,976
Is this from a security camera?
197
00:08:46,068 --> 00:08:48,238
-And last but not least...
-VAL: Not least.
198
00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,370
...your ceremonial
sacred wrench engraved...
199
00:08:51,448 --> 00:08:53,778
-I engraved it.
-...with the name of our newest member.
200
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:56,037
-Welcome, Tylor!
-One of us!
201
00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:59,249
I mean, you really shouldn't have
gone to all this trouble.
202
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,751
I am not going to be here that long.
203
00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:04,384
Oh. I like the sound of that.
204
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,711
-Do you like it, Roto?
-(GROWLS)
205
00:09:06,797 --> 00:09:09,677
Roto doesn't trust it.
Therefore, I don't trust it.
206
00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:12,298
-(GROWLS)
-Oh. Oh. Uh...
207
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,426
Is he even allowed to have pets at work?
208
00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:16,973
"Pet"? He's my emotional support animal.
209
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,677
Aren't you, Roto? (KISSES)
210
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:20,017
It's a medical condition.
211
00:09:20,102 --> 00:09:23,402
Now, you wait here, Tylor,
'cause we have one more surprise.
212
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:26,690
-You're gonna love it.
-CUTTER: L-U-C-K-Y.
213
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,605
Uh-huh. Meanwhile,
I'll get ol' young Tylor here
214
00:09:28,694 --> 00:09:30,494
set up with some canister refurbishments.
215
00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:34,657
All right, pretty boy.
Here's a type A-188 series B canister.
216
00:09:34,741 --> 00:09:38,251
The screen valve's about to experience
a catastrophic failure in 23 seconds.
217
00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,538
-Here's the manual. Go.
-(STUTTERS) Okay...
218
00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:41,832
Fifteen seconds!
219
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:44,625
"Flow valve, F-4." No, no. Forget it.
220
00:09:44,710 --> 00:09:46,750
-Five seconds!
-There's gotta... No. No, no, no.
221
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:52,927
(EXCLAIMS)
222
00:09:55,429 --> 00:09:56,559
Oh!
223
00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:58,018
Get down! Get down!
224
00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:03,602
Well, time for lunch.
225
00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:06,479
(DUNCAN WHISTLES)
226
00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:09,316
(CLICKS TONGUE)
Fritz sure will be disappointed.
227
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,910
You really messed that up.
(CHUCKLES)
228
00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:14,658
I'll tell you what's messed up.
229
00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:16,620
You trying to kill me, okay?
230
00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:18,870
You guys are the ones who are messed up.
231
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,462
I'm going to comedy class. Crazy MIFTers.
232
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:24,328
MIFTonians. MIFTies.
233
00:10:24,416 --> 00:10:27,916
MIFTamacallits. MIFTouts.
234
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:29,633
Uh... Push?
235
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:30,713
(PANTING)
236
00:10:31,507 --> 00:10:32,927
MIFTfits.
237
00:10:34,051 --> 00:10:38,471
-Piñata time, piñata time, olé!
-Piñata time, piñata time, olé!
238
00:10:39,056 --> 00:10:40,716
-Hey.
-What happened?
239
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,267
Duncan, what did you do?
240
00:10:42,351 --> 00:10:43,521
(SPUTTERS)
241
00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:46,520
Whoa. Don't listen to him, okay?
242
00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:49,145
He's exaggerating.
I didn't try to kill him.
243
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:51,193
The rookie couldn't change a simple valve.
244
00:10:51,276 --> 00:10:52,276
Where did he go?
245
00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:54,361
He said something about a comedy class.
246
00:10:54,446 --> 00:10:56,196
-I don't keep his schedule.
-Comedy class?
247
00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:58,281
He didn't say anything
about a comedy class.
248
00:10:58,367 --> 00:10:59,907
I don't understand.
249
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,083
I tried so hard
to make him feel welcome here.
250
00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:05,042
I gave him a desk, a nameplate, and look,
251
00:11:05,123 --> 00:11:08,133
he never even drank his Drooler Cooler.
252
00:11:08,210 --> 00:11:10,050
Sad sigh.
253
00:11:10,128 --> 00:11:12,628
Welcome to Mike's
very first class on comedy.
254
00:11:12,714 --> 00:11:13,804
I'm Mike. Hello.
255
00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:16,302
It's my class, on comedy.
Before we get started,
256
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:18,675
I'd like to say a few words
about my comedy journey.
257
00:11:18,762 --> 00:11:20,262
I was born in a tiny hamlet...
258
00:11:20,347 --> 00:11:22,597
I have got to get onto that Laugh Floor.
259
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:24,643
Yeah, can't happen soon enough.
260
00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:27,516
Tell me about it.
They stuck me down with the MIFT lunatics.
261
00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:29,024
Huh. Brutal.
262
00:11:29,106 --> 00:11:31,606
Yeah. "Monsters, Inc. Facilities Team."
(SCOFFS)
263
00:11:31,692 --> 00:11:33,612
I've yet to see them fix anything.
264
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:35,654
I'm surprised
this place is still standing.
265
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:37,777
Sooner I get away from those guys,
the better.
266
00:11:37,865 --> 00:11:39,985
Tylor. Tylor.
267
00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:41,485
-Tylor! Hey!
-No. Stop it!
268
00:11:41,577 --> 00:11:42,657
Ty-Ty! Hi!
269
00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:43,834
What are you doing here?
270
00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:46,252
-You forgot your Drooler Cooler.
-And us.
271
00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:48,711
So, I insisted we all bring it to you.
272
00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:50,132
Aren't we lucky?
273
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:52,380
Ah! More students. Hello! Take a seat.
274
00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:56,222
Hey, thanks!
So, when you say "take a seat,"
275
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:58,550
does that mean I have to return it?
276
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:00,255
Ha! You see what I did there?
277
00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:01,925
My first joke. Wow.
278
00:12:02,014 --> 00:12:04,564
Mr. W, the class really works.
279
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:05,891
Don't quit your day job.
280
00:12:05,976 --> 00:12:08,556
We'll be chatting about my
Ten Rules of Comedy. Ready?
281
00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:11,105
"Punch line does not mean
actually punching somebody."
282
00:12:11,190 --> 00:12:13,360
I joined the improv group at MU,
Monsters of Comedy.
283
00:12:13,442 --> 00:12:14,532
-You were in it?
-Nope.
284
00:12:14,610 --> 00:12:16,150
They did this thing, "Yes, and..."
285
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:17,736
where you have to say, "Yes, and..."
286
00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:20,161
They asked for 50 bucks
and I said, "Yes, and..."
287
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:23,200
"Hundred bucks?" "Yes, and..."
"Two hundred bucks?" "Yes, and..."
288
00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:25,405
-It was a very expensive class.
-MIKE: That's it for me.
289
00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:26,995
Got through quicker than I thought.
290
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,710
Here's Ms. Flint to share comedy data.
291
00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:29,920
Back to the Laugh Floor.
292
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,540
"Comedy theory. It's no laughing matter."
293
00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:38,764
Another power outage?
294
00:12:38,842 --> 00:12:41,852
Don't you worry, schmoopsie-poo.
Your power ball of comedy is back.
295
00:12:41,929 --> 00:12:43,179
(BREATHING RAPIDLY)
296
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:45,925
Perfect timing, Fungus.
297
00:12:46,016 --> 00:12:48,136
With these power outages,
I don't think it's safe.
298
00:12:48,227 --> 00:12:49,227
Out of my way.
299
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:51,771
I got 35 and three-quarter hours
left on my energy drink.
300
00:12:51,855 --> 00:12:53,935
-I don't think you should!
-I'm going in!
301
00:12:55,442 --> 00:12:57,532
(EXCLAIMS) Reset, reset, reset!
302
00:12:58,403 --> 00:12:59,533
Oh, that's not working.
303
00:12:59,613 --> 00:13:00,783
(MACHINE BEEPING)
304
00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:03,954
(SHUDDERS) We've got a 13-20. A 13-20!
305
00:13:04,034 --> 00:13:06,124
-Googly bear's trapped!
-(SNAKES SCREAMS)
306
00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:08,043
MISS FLINT: Comedy is not
just about laughter.
307
00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:10,251
It's also about rules,
categories, and acronyms.
308
00:13:10,332 --> 00:13:11,882
Any questions?
309
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,169
(SPUTTERS)
310
00:13:13,252 --> 00:13:15,212
(LAUGHS) Oh.
311
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,585
-Interesting insight.
-(ALARM BLARING)
312
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:20,223
CELIA: (OVER PA)
Attention, please. We have a 13-20.
313
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,550
I need MIFT to report
to Laugh Floor F-station-five.
314
00:13:22,636 --> 00:13:23,886
13-20. A monster is trapped.
315
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:25,641
-Duncan, grab Cutter.
-Got it.
316
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:26,892
-Val, gear up!
-Gearing up.
317
00:13:26,974 --> 00:13:30,064
-Tylor, you're with us. Come on!
-Me? Yeah, there's nothing...
318
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,813
Tylor, you are with us. Come on!
319
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:36,435
MISS FLINT: Actually, Banana Bread, is it?
320
00:13:36,525 --> 00:13:37,525
(SPUTTERS)
321
00:13:37,609 --> 00:13:39,699
-Could you stay behind for a moment?
-(ALARM BLARING)
322
00:13:40,362 --> 00:13:41,662
(TYLOR EXCLAIMING)
323
00:13:47,619 --> 00:13:49,199
-Who's trapped?
-It's Mike!
324
00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:53,289
Come on, let's go.
325
00:13:54,168 --> 00:13:56,298
We need to get power
to this control panel.
326
00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:59,168
-Val, generator.
-Look out! Coming through!
327
00:13:59,256 --> 00:14:00,666
-We need cable, stat.
-Yes, sir.
328
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:02,967
-FRITZ: Cutter, bypass control.
-You got it.
329
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,756
VAL: We got power!
330
00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:09,390
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
331
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:11,520
(BEEPS)
332
00:14:12,269 --> 00:14:13,649
DUNCAN: Back in business!
333
00:14:13,729 --> 00:14:16,819
(SIGHS) I spent my whole life
trying to get my foot in the door.
334
00:14:16,899 --> 00:14:19,149
Then I couldn't even get it...
(SCREAMS)
335
00:14:19,234 --> 00:14:20,244
Mike!
336
00:14:20,319 --> 00:14:23,029
The control panel's fried.
Cutter, open the pit.
337
00:14:23,113 --> 00:14:25,493
CUTTER: Way ahead of you!
Open in three, two, one.
338
00:14:26,158 --> 00:14:28,078
-Duncan. Eyes down below.
-Yep!
339
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,330
(GRUNTING)
340
00:14:30,996 --> 00:14:32,956
Backup system's shorted out.
341
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,750
(YELPING)
342
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,625
Don't worry, googly bear,
we're getting you down.
343
00:14:37,711 --> 00:14:39,591
Switch to manual override.
344
00:14:40,756 --> 00:14:42,546
-MIKE: Schmoopsie-poo!
-(DUNCAN GRUNTS)
345
00:14:45,636 --> 00:14:46,886
(EXCLAIMS)
346
00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:48,310
(SCREAMS)
347
00:14:57,898 --> 00:15:00,228
-CELIA: Oh. Mike...
-SULLEY: Googly bear...
348
00:15:00,776 --> 00:15:03,486
Duncan, reverse the conveyor track.
349
00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:04,570
Reverse! Yes, sir.
350
00:15:07,199 --> 00:15:08,739
(GRUNTING)
351
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:10,655
It's rusted in place!
352
00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,504
I can't turn it.
353
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,829
Duncan's arms are way too scrawny
and far too weak.
354
00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:17,076
-DUNCAN: I heard that.
-Val?
355
00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:19,626
Sorry, these puppies aren't long enough.
356
00:15:20,671 --> 00:15:22,091
Oh, dear.
357
00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:25,013
Of course. Tylor.
358
00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:26,971
Me? No, no, no.
359
00:15:27,052 --> 00:15:30,262
Get in there, champ, and wrench that nut.
360
00:15:31,098 --> 00:15:34,348
Come on, big guy. Wrench the nut.
361
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,734
Wrench the nut!
362
00:15:36,812 --> 00:15:38,312
Wrench the nut.
363
00:15:38,397 --> 00:15:40,017
-Wrench the nut.
-Wrench the nut.
364
00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:41,357
Wrench the nut.
365
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,691
Wrench the nut.
366
00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:44,566
Wrench the nut.
367
00:15:45,279 --> 00:15:46,489
Wrench the nut.
368
00:15:46,572 --> 00:15:48,202
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
369
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:52,825
(SIGHS)
370
00:15:59,168 --> 00:16:00,208
(GROANS)
371
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:06,260
(GRUNTING)
372
00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:12,101
(TYLOR EXHALES)
373
00:16:13,223 --> 00:16:14,223
MIKE: Whoo-hoo!
374
00:16:16,268 --> 00:16:18,478
Ready. Now!
375
00:16:24,109 --> 00:16:25,649
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
376
00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:29,364
Another Laugh Canister...
377
00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:31,032
(MACHINE DINGS)
378
00:16:31,617 --> 00:16:32,657
...filled.
379
00:16:32,743 --> 00:16:33,913
(SNORING)
380
00:16:35,204 --> 00:16:36,464
Only took him two hours
381
00:16:36,538 --> 00:16:39,418
to burn through all
thirty-six-and-a-half hours of energy.
382
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,629
Oh, let's just let him sleep.
383
00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:45,424
Great job, MIFT. And thank you, Tylor.
384
00:16:45,506 --> 00:16:47,586
No, no. It was a team effort, really.
Really.
385
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:50,014
Well, they couldn't have
done it without you.
386
00:16:50,093 --> 00:16:52,553
You did it!
You wrenched the heck out of that nut.
387
00:16:52,638 --> 00:16:55,098
You finished your first job as a MIFTer.
388
00:16:55,182 --> 00:16:57,602
-Yeah!
-This calls for a celebration!
389
00:16:58,519 --> 00:17:00,939
-First round of Drooler Coolers on me!
-VAL: Oh, yeah.
390
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,861
-(EXCLAIMS)
-CUTTER: There you go.
391
00:17:02,940 --> 00:17:06,650
You know what, guys?
The second round's on... Banana Bread?
392
00:17:06,735 --> 00:17:07,855
(SPUTTERS)
393
00:17:07,945 --> 00:17:10,985
Hey, Double B.
Come celebrate with your buddily bud-buds.
394
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,323
There won't be time for that.
395
00:17:12,407 --> 00:17:14,657
Winchester here
is needed on the Laugh Floor.
396
00:17:14,743 --> 00:17:16,663
Whoa. Your name is Winchester?
397
00:17:16,745 --> 00:17:18,325
Wait. What? Laugh Floor?
398
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:21,793
I was intrigued by Winchester's
nuanced insight on comic theory.
399
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:23,875
So, on that hunch, I ran some tests
400
00:17:23,961 --> 00:17:26,591
and, well, turns out, he's hilarious.
401
00:17:26,672 --> 00:17:28,262
-(SPUTTERS)
-(LAUGHS)
402
00:17:28,882 --> 00:17:31,342
Stop, stop! (LAUGHS)
403
00:17:31,426 --> 00:17:33,386
Seriously, save it for the kids.
404
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:35,720
Oh. My stomach hurts from laughing.
405
00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:38,180
Way to go, Banana Bread.
406
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,940
Yep. There goes my free baked goods.
407
00:17:41,019 --> 00:17:44,359
You think you know a guy,
other than, of course, his real name.
408
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:45,979
But I guess for some people...
409
00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:47,316
(SNIFFLES)
410
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,031
MIFT just isn't special enough.
411
00:18:02,165 --> 00:18:04,285
But now, we've got Tylor.
412
00:18:04,376 --> 00:18:10,296
Swift with the wrench
I welcome you to your new desk
413
00:18:10,382 --> 00:18:12,592
Temporary new desk.
Not planning on staying.
414
00:18:12,676 --> 00:18:14,336
Good ol' Double T.
415
00:18:14,970 --> 00:18:16,390
I still have the piñata!
416
00:18:16,471 --> 00:18:17,511
Piñata time!
417
00:18:17,598 --> 00:18:19,218
Ooh. I'll take that action.
418
00:18:19,308 --> 00:18:21,228
I'd like to bash the head first, if I may.
419
00:18:21,310 --> 00:18:23,190
FRITZ: Piñata time!
420
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:24,940
VAL: Piñata time!
421
00:18:25,522 --> 00:18:27,192
Yep. Weird.
422
00:18:27,274 --> 00:18:29,324
Piñata time!
423
00:18:29,401 --> 00:18:30,991
FRITZ: Piñata time!
424
00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,659
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
425
00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:57,139
While becoming a jokester
makes kids laugh,
426
00:18:57,221 --> 00:18:58,511
you'll have to be careful.
427
00:18:58,597 --> 00:18:59,767
(CLEARS THROAT)
428
00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,888
Otis, if you will.
429
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:02,975
(PLAYS PIANO)
430
00:19:03,060 --> 00:19:05,440
Comedy can be dangerous, my friends
I'll tell you why
431
00:19:06,146 --> 00:19:08,766
When kids laugh and giggle
They could split a gut
432
00:19:08,857 --> 00:19:11,607
With a chortle, they could crack up
Beware, there is the chance
433
00:19:11,693 --> 00:19:14,663
You could make a kid laugh so hard
They'd pee their pants
434
00:19:14,738 --> 00:19:17,408
Fall out of bed, hit their head
While rolling on the floor
435
00:19:17,491 --> 00:19:20,411
Their bodies shake, sides will ache
They'll laugh until they're sore
436
00:19:20,494 --> 00:19:23,124
There's a funny bone, a danger zone
Someplace no one knows
437
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:26,115
If you hit that zone, hold the phone
Milk shoots out their nose
438
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:27,498
(ALL CHUCKLING)
439
00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:31,709
Kids are fragile
Careful not to scoff
440
00:19:31,797 --> 00:19:34,967
Your joke can make
Their heads and butts fall off
441
00:19:35,050 --> 00:19:37,590
Jokes and gags hit 'em hard
With punch lines, so I've read
442
00:19:37,678 --> 00:19:40,138
You could leave a kid in stitches
Or even knock 'em dead
443
00:19:40,222 --> 00:19:41,852
-Knock-knock.
-Who's there?
444
00:19:41,932 --> 00:19:43,352
-Police.
-Police, who?
445
00:19:43,433 --> 00:19:45,353
Police end this song.
446
00:19:45,435 --> 00:19:46,935
(PIANO PLAYS)
447
00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:49,364
(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)
448
00:22:38,817 --> 00:22:40,777
VAL: Whoo-hoo!
You watched all the credits.
449
00:22:40,861 --> 00:22:42,741
That makes you a true MIFTer!
450
00:22:43,906 --> 00:22:45,196
FRITZ: MIFTer!