Church: Hahaha, it worked! I can't believe Caboose came through!
How do you like that Wyoming?
We even have our tank now.
Boo-yeah Motherfuc-
Caboose: Sheila, um, did you send the tank out there to... help them?
Sheila: Negative.
Caboose: Oh, so the tank went out there...
...On its own
Sheila: Affirmative
Caboose: Sheila. I think they might be in trouble.
Sheila: Affirmative
Caboose: I... Should help them!
Sheila: Affirmative
Caboose: I can go out there.
Sheila: Negative.
Caboose: And help them beat Wyoming.
Sheila: Negative.
Caboose: And save the day.
Sheila: Nope.
Caboose: AND EVERYONE WILL LOVE ME!
Sheila: What?
Caboose: ESPECIALLY CHURCH!
Sheila: My sensors indicate you don't stand a chance.
Caboose: Thanks Sheila!
This is a great plan!
Wyoming: You know I really can't thank you enough for leaving your tank completely unattended.
It was very kind of you old chap.
Makes your defeat and humiliation so much easier.
Church: Yeah. Well great. Glad we could help.
I'm sure if you give us enough time we'll just kill ourselves.
Save you some ammo.
Wyoming: If it makes you feel any better, your death is for a very noble cause.
Church: What do you want with Tucker's kid anyway?
Tucker: What?! How did we get here?! What?!
Church: What's wrong with you?
Tucker: With me?! What's happening?!
Church: Um, we're being held prisoner. Where the hell have you been?
Tucker: What?! How?! I'm so confused!
Church: What do you mean how? Are you retarded?!
Tucker: But Tex! She-
Church: I know. Tex'll take him out.
Wyoming: Oh right. Tex. You mean...
Wyoming: HER!
Poor Tex. Never could figure out when she'd been beaten.
Church: What the- How did you know where she was?
Tucker: What do you mean? That's where she was before.
Church: BEFORE WHAT!?
Church: Tucker have you gone insane!?
Wyoming: Wait a minute. What's going on?
Gary: I think he knows.
Wyoming: I think your right.
Caboose: Church! I am coming to help! Don't start without me!
Wyoming: It's the idiot! Take care of him. Quickly.
Gary: Right.
Tucker: Caboose! No! Stay Back! Don't get near the tank!
Caboose: (Screaming) AHHHH!
Church: Caboose!! NOOOOO!!!
Sarge: Woah!
Sarge: Looks like the blue one just got killed by the tank.
Simmons: A Blue got killed by their own tank?
Man I just had the wierdest sense of Deja Vu.
Grif: Hey-ey. Speaking of getting tanked.
We should see if the Blues have any beer around here.
Sarge: Hey-oh!
(Boom)
Tucker: Go! Move!
(Boom)
Tucker: Look out!
(Boom)
Church: Caboose! Caboose!
Ah fuck! He's not moving!
Tucker: I'm telling you he's dead. Just like last time.
Church: Tucker! You are going to start making sense, right now!
That's an order!
Tucker: This already happened.
Wyoming shot Caboose. Tex jumped Wyoming and knocked his gun away and then-
Church: Tex is unconscious!
Tucker: Fucking A! I know! That's what I'm saying!
(Gun Fire)
Wyoming: Ahh!
Church: Oh! I hit him! I hit him! I can't believe I hit- I mean-
I knew this sniper rifle was awesome!
Tucker: This is just like last time! Once Wyoming lost everything seemed to-
...reset.
Wyoming: You know I really can't thank you enough for leaving your tank completely unattended.
It was very kind of you old chap.
Makes your defeat and humiliation so much easier.
Church: Yeah, well great. Glad we could help.
I'm sure if you give us enough time we'll just kill ourselves. Save you some ammo.
Wyoming: If it makes you feel any better. Your death is for a very noble cause.
Church: What do you want with Tucker's kid anyway?
Tucker: What is going on?!
Church: Um? We're being held prisoner. Where the hell have you been?
Tucker: Church, don't you remember any of this?!
Church: Tucker, what the fuck are you talking about?
Gary: He knows.
Wyoming: How the devil is he keeping up with us?
Gary: Irrelevant. Eliminate him.
Tucker: Go! Move!
Tex! Look out! He knows where you are!
Tex: What?!
Caboose: Church! I am coming to help! Don't start without me!
Tucker: Oh shit! I forgot about Caboose!
(Bang)
Caboose: Erg! I am dead.
Church: CABOOSE! NOOOO!!!
Sarge: Yowza! Looks like the blue one just got sniped.
Grif: Hey speaking of getting sniped. we should see if the Blues have any-
...beer around here?
Simmons: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Grif: I don't know. It sounded a lot funnier in my head before I said it.
Simmons: Man. I just had the weirdest sense of deja vu.
Tucker: Aw, crap.
Church: What do you mean "Aw crap" Caboose just got killed.
Tucker: Yeah I know, but I'm pretty sure it's okay.
Somehow Wyoming keeps looping us through the same events over and over again.
And no one but me seems to remember.
I don't know how but every time he gets hurt things just start-
Church: Yeah, well great glad we could help.
I'm sure if you give us enough time we'll just kill ourselves save you some ammo.
Tucker: Yeah, what do you want with my kid anyway?
Wyoming: You don't... remember?
Tucker: Remember? You never told me anything.
Gary: I think it worked that time.
Wyoming: Apparently, keep your eye on him next time.
Church: The fuck are you guys talking about?
Oh you know what, keep talking waste time until Tex kills you.
Wyoming: Oh right, dear Tex you mean...
Her!
(Punch; Tex groans)
Oh, poor Tex never could understand when she was-
(Energy Sword turns on)
Tucker: Beaten!!
Wyoming: Oh dear!
(Energy Sword pulls out; Wyoming falls)
Gary: Reggie!
Tucker: That's right, bitch. I take care of my kids.
Caboose: I AM COMING TO HELP! DON'T START WITHOUT ME!
Tucker: Caboose, get the fuck out of here!
(Gunshots)
Caboose: Ok, bye. I don't want to help anymore.
Sarge: Whoa, looks like the white guy just got stabbed.
Grif: Hey, speaking of getting stabbed...
I think I have a headache all of a sudden
For some reason I want a beer.
Simmons: Man, I just had the weirdest sense of...
What's that thing called when you think you've did but you don't know if you did it?
Grif: How the fuck should I know?
Church:(Explosion in background)Tucker, how did you know that was going to happen?
Tucker: Cause of Wyoming!
You know how Tex said every Freelancer had an A.I and a special ability?
Church: Yeah.
Tucker: I think Wyoming can loop us through little segments of time,
And he just keeps doing it over and over again until he wins.
Church: Wait, what how many times did we loop?
Tucker: Who knows? Doesn't matter now. That cocksucker is dead!
Church: No no, it does matter don't you remember how we came here to begin with?
I got stuck in a loop and every time I went back I left a bunch of...
Copies.
Wyoming: Hello.
*Wyomings laughing*
*One more Wyoming laughs*
Simmons: Greetings, fellow web surfer before to subscribe to our channel before you go.
It'll be just like we're friends!
Not that I need friends.
*Nervous Laughter*
Please don't go!