我一直生活在谎言中 I'VE BEEN LIVING A LIE
并以此为生。 AND MAKING A LIVING OUT OF IT.
但是我不能…… BUT I CAN'T...
我不能再和你这样下去了…… I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE WITH YOU...
和我在一起。 WITH ME.
我只是…我要你爱我 I JUST... I WANT YOU TO LOVE ME
即使没有掌声。 EVEN WHEN THERE'S NO APPLAUSE.
我想让它是- I WANT THIS TO BE-
周杰伦!(气呼呼地说) JAY! (HUFFS)
（镜头变焦） (CAMERA LENS ZOOMS)
你不是个好导演。 YOU'RE NOT BEING A VERY GOOD DIRECTOR.
娃娃脸, DOLLFACE,
你想在这行成功， YOU WANT TO MAKE IT IN THIS BUSINESS,
你得把它卖掉 YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SELL IT
还有两个按钮… AND TWO BUTTONS JUST...
这可不行，亲爱的。 THAT ISN'T SELLING IT, HONEY.
但是三就可以了。 BUT THREE DOES.
让我们看看你在选角台上的表现。 LET'S SEE HOW YOU PERFORM ON THE CASTING COUCH.
曼尼：（半笑） MANNY: (HALF LAUGHS)
(接吻) (KISSING)
(挣扎呼吸) (STRUGGLING BREATHS)
我不可能完成这个演示 I AM NEVER GOING TO GET THIS DEMO DONE
史密斯戴尔大学的，是吗？ FOR SMITHDALE U, AM I?
放松。 RELAX.
看到那边那些空白dvd了吗？ SEE THOSE BLANK DVDS OVER THERE?
我们有99个机会 WE'VE GOT 99 OPPORTUNITIES
拍一部关于你的难忘电影 TO MAKE A MEMORABLE MOVIE ABOUT YOU
还是……或者我们。 OR... OR US.
更像是99题。 MORE LIKE 99 PROBLEMS.
我不想要那种令人难忘的磁带。 I DON'T WANT THAT KIND OF MEMORABLE TAPE.
是啊，但如果你去史密斯代尔？ YEAH, BUT IF YOU GO TO SMITHDALE?
你的未婚夫需要一点… YOUR FIANCE'S GOING TO NEED A LITTLE...
在你上课的时候帮他渡过难关。 SOMETHING TO TIDE HIM OVER WHEN YOU'RE IN CLASS.
这是一个什么样的幻想世界？ WHAT FANTASY WORLD IS THAT?
我走了，你留在这里， I'M GOING AWAY, YOU'RE STAYING HERE,
毕业后我们的假订婚就结束了。 AND OUR FAKE ENGAGEMENT IS OVER AS OF GRADUATION.
也许不是。 MAYBE NOT.
（哈哈大笑） (SNORT OF LAUGHTER)
(咯咯笑) (GIGGLING)
♪♪♪ ♪♪♪
斯宾纳：嘿，托尼·霍金！ SPINNER: HEY, TONY HAWKING!
等了! WAIT UP!
我是史蒂芬·霍金， IT'S STEPHEN HAWKING,
你的, DID YOUR,
你的大脑也得了癌症吗？ DID YOUR BRAIN GET CANCER TOO?
哦，真有趣，真有趣。 OH, THAT'S FUNNY, THAT'S FUNNY.
事实上，我的第一轮化疗已经结束了 ACTUALLY, MY FIRST ROUND OF CHEMO'S DONE
正好赶上春假。 JUST IN TIME FOR SPRING BREAK.
吉米：我知道，对吧？ JIMMY: I KNOW, RIGHT?
还有7个小时。 SEVEN HOURS TO GO.
斯宾纳：只有五天 SPINNER: AND ONLY FIVE DAYS
直到你和我爽起来 UNTIL YOU AND I ARE ROCKING OUT
在史密斯戴尔校区。 ON THE SMITHDALE CAMPUS.
嗯? HUH?
你是不是和紫龙戒了？ IS THIS OFF THE WAGON WITH PURPLE DRAGON?
你是怎么赢的？！ HOW DID YOU WIN THESE?!
我喝了很多紫龙酒 I DRANK A TON OF PURPLE DRAGON
正在接受化疗。 GOING THROUGH CHEMO.
没喝多，但我喝了很多。 DIDN'T KEEP MUCH DOWN, BUT I DRANK A LOT.
我不认为那些是真的。 I DON'T THINK THOSE ARE REAL.
曼尼：春假，派对派对！ MANNY: SPRING BREAK, PARTY-PARTY!
埃玛：史密斯戴尔，我们来了。 EMMA: SMITHDALE, HERE WE COME.
我给我们订了校园游 I BOOKED US A CAMPUS TOUR
这样我们才不会看起来像绝望的白痴 SO WE DON'T LOOK LIKE HOPELESS MORONS
如果我们能进去。 IF WE GET IN.
我等不及要去看剧院了！ I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE THEATRE!
我需要放假。 AND I NEED A VAY-CAY.
辛普森-尼尔森店的气氛很紧张 THINGS ARE TENSE AT THE SIMPSON-NELSON PLACE
我爸爸整天都在家。 WITH MY DAD HOME ALL DAY.
我在兄弟会有个朋友。 I HAVE A FRIEND AT PSI ALPHA ZETA.
我相信她会让你们留下的。 I'M SURE SHE'D LET YOU GUYS STAY.
应该是一段疯狂的时光。 SHOULD BE A WILD TIME.
希礼：还有空位吗？ ASHLEY: THERE ROOM FOR ONE MORE?
托比：什么，你要放弃佛罗里达？ TOBY: WHAT, YOU'RE BAILING ON FLORIDA?
谁和我一起坐意念轴？ WHO'S GONNA RIDE THE MINDSHAFT WITH ME?
你够高吗？ YOU EVEN TALL ENOUGH FOR THAT?
计划有变。 THERE WAS A CHANGE OF PLANS.
你怎么看？我愿意付油钱。 SO WHAT DO YOU THINK? I'D PITCH IN FOR GAS.
我们都能挤进我的车里。 WE COULD ALL CRAM INTO MY CAR.
如果你明白的话。 IF YOU GET IT.
曼尼：别担心。 MANNY: DON'T WORRY,
今晚我要和家长们坐下来谈谈。 I'M SITTING DOWN WITH THE PARENTALS TONIGHT.
你要怎么得到它们 HOW ARE YOU GOING TO GET THEM
让你开车去史密斯代尔？ TO LET YOU DRIVE TO SMITHDALE?
通过说服他们让我和杰 BY CONVINCING THEM TO LET JAY AND I
去看望他可怜的、生病的奶奶。 VISIT HIS POOR, SICK GRANDMA.
说实话不是更容易吗？ WOULDN'T IT BE EASIER TO TELL THE TRUTH?
曼尼：相信我，会更容易的 MANNY: TRUST ME, IT'LL BE EASIER
一旦我挥舞着史密斯代尔大学的录取通知书 ONCE I'M WAVING A SMITHDALE ACCEPTANCE LETTER
在他们的脸上。 IN THEIR FACES.
公告：祝本周末参加海选的同学们好运 ANNOUNCEMENT: GOOD LUCK TO ALL STUDENTS AUDITIONING THIS WEEKEND
史密斯戴尔的戏剧节目。 FOR THE SMITHDALE DRAMA PROGRAM.
（鞋跟的撞击声） (APPROACHING HEELS CLONK)
护士说你没什么问题。 THE NURSE SAYS THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.
有。她不相信我。 THERE IS. SHE DOESN'T BELIEVE ME.
嗯… HMM...
逃学，装病 WELL, SKIPPING SCHOOL, FAKING SICK,
谎称自己被老师骚扰， LYING ABOUT BEING HARRASSED BY A TEACHER,
也许你变得难以置信了？ MAYBE YOU'RE BECOMING HARD TO BELIEVE?
每个人都在窃窃私语，妈妈。 EVERYONE WHISPERS, MOM.
他们都知道是我害辛普森没来的。 THEY ALL KNOW I'M THE REASON SIMPSON'S NOT HERE.
我受不了了！ I CAN'T TAKE IT!
我能回家吗？ PLEASE CAN I JUST GO HOME?
很好。 FINE.
但我们稍后会回到这里， BUT WE'RE COMING BACK HERE LATER,
我们要开会。 WE HAVE A MEETING.
无论什么。 WHATEVER.
我们能走了吗？ CAN WE GO?
(音乐) (MUSIC)
不，只是需要新鲜的油。 NAH, IT JUST NEEDS FRESH OIL.
（轮毂盖发出咔哒声） (HUB CAP CLATTERS)
哇，如果有儿童汽车援助， WOW, IF THERE WAS CHILDREN'S AID FOR CARS,
我会打电话。 I WOULD BE ON THE PHONE.
你没别的事可做吗 HEY, DON'T YOU HAVE SOMETHING BETTER TO DO
而不是整天骑在我屁股上？ THAN RIDE MY ASS ALL DAY?
等曼纽拉来了再说。 NOT UNTIL MANUELA GETS HERE.
你和曼尼？ YOU AND MANNY?
是啊，我们…订婚了。 YEAH, WE'RE UH... ENGAGED.
是的,订婚。(笑) YEAH, ENGAGED. (LAUGHS)
真的吗? FOR REAL?
不，是假的，但好处是真的 NO, FOR FAKE, BUT THE BENEFITS ARE REAL
而且，她太性感了。 AND BESIDES, SHE IS SO HOT.
你知道的, YOU KNOW,
我甚至不介意开车带她去史密斯代尔。 I DON'T EVEN MIND DRIVING UP TO SMITHDALE WITH HER.
微调控制项:她? SPINNER: SMITHDALE?
杰伊:是的。 JAY: YEAH.
我们能搭便车吗？ CAN WE BUM A RIDE?
（傻笑）对不起，桑托斯的车满了。 (SMIRKS) SORRY, SANTOS CAR IS FULL.
在这里。 HERE.
(对象重击声) (OBJECT THUDS)
这应该能让你的马达运转起来。 THIS SHOULD GET YOUR MOTOR RUNNING.
说到马达的运转， SPEAKING OF MOTORS RUNNING,
听起来她让你很兴奋啊。 SOUNDS LIKE SHE'S GOT YOU PRETTY REVVED UP.
杰伊：我能说什么呢？ JAY: WHAT CAN I SAY?
她精力充沛。 SHE IS HIGH-OCTANE.
（远处传来发动机的嗡嗡声） (ENGINE WHIRS IN THE DISTANCE)
我希望这是关于 I WANT THIS TO BE ABOUT
不仅仅是脚下的玫瑰。 MORE THAN JUST ROSES AT OUR FEET.
因为当灯光暗淡窗帘落下 'CAUSE WHEN THE LIGHTS DIM AND THE CURTAINS DROP,
我们只剩下手牵着手。 WE'RE LEFT HOLDING HANDS.
完美的。太棒了。 PERFECT TAKE. JUST AMAZING.
力学:(鼓掌) MECHANICS: (APPLAUDING)
(笑) (LAUGHS)
你去史密斯代尔的票；官方的样片。 YOUR TICKET TO SMITHDALE; THE OFFICIAL DEMO REEL.
我一进屋父母就把我搜身。 MY PARENTS PAT ME DOWN WHEN I ENTER THE HOUSE.
明天带来吗？ BRING IT TOMORROW?
HM-HMM。 HM-HMM.
曼尼：（兴奋地呼吸）我好紧张！ MANNY: (EXCITED BREATH) I'M SO NERVOUS!
这是我这辈子最大的试镜！ THIS IS THE HUGEST AUDITION OF MY LIFE!
如果它飞不起来 WELL, IF IT DOESN'T FLY,
这张dvd会给你带来成人故事片。 THIS DVD'LL LAND YOU AN ADULT FEATURE.
昨天我们亲热的片段。 SOME SCENES FROM OUR LITTLE MAKE-OUT SESSION YESTERDAY.
你录下来了？ YOU RECORDED IT?
我不小心忘了关相机， I ACCIDENTALLY LEFT THE CAMERA ON,
但我需要这个 BUT I'M GONNA NEED THIS
因为你会出名的 'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA GET FAMOUS AND...
离开我。 LEAVE ME.
你凭什么认为我会等到成名 WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL WAIT TILL I'M FAMOUS
离开你？ TO LEAVE YOU?
所以，我来这里是为了玩得开心， SO, I'M HERE FOR A GOOD TIME,
时间不长吗？ NOT A LONG TIME?
那是我的小骑兵。 THAT'S MY LITTLE TROOPER.
扔掉吧，我是认真的。 THROW IT OUT, I'M SERIOUS.
准备好了吗？ READY FOR OPERATION PARENT-CON?
（车门砰的一声） (CAR DOOR SLAMS)
（车门砰的一声） (CAR DOORS SLAM)
你确定要这么做吗？ ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS?
我想这对我有好处，妈妈。 I THINK IT'LL BE GOOD FOR ME, MOM.
诚实。 HONESTLY.
达西：怎么了？ DARCY: WHAT'S GOING ON?
你不是说我们要开会吗？ I THOUGHT YOU SAID WE HAD A MEETING?
灵熊：欢迎来到红松提升计划 SPIRIT BEAR: WELCOME TO THE RED PINE ASCENT PROGRAM
给问题青少年的。 FOR TROUBLED TEENS.
我是白灵熊，这是林肯。 I AM SPIRIT BEAR AND THIS IS LINC.
还有爱你的人 AND THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU
已经到了绝望的地步。 HAVE REACHED A POINT OF HOPELESSNESS.
所以，在接下来的一周， SO, OVER THIS NEXT WEEK,
我们会帮你发现新的方法 WE'RE GONNA HELP YOU DISCOVER NEW WAYS
解决你的问题。 TO DEAL WITH YOUR ISSUES.
这是什么，劳改营吗？ WHAT IS THIS, SOME KIND OF WORK CAMP?
白灵熊：是时候说再见了。 SPIRIT BEAR: IT'S TIME TO SAY GOODBYE.
达西：（紧张地呼吸） DARCY: (NERVOUS BREATHS)
否。否。 NO. NO.
请不要把我留在这里。 PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME HERE.
我会改变的，我保证！ I WILL CHANGE, I PROMISE!
妈妈? MOM?
爸爸? DAD?
这是最好的结果，达西。 IT'S FOR THE BEST, DARCY.
（难以置信地呼出） (EXHALE OF DISBELIEF)
坐在那边。 SIT OVER THERE.
现在，请大家脱掉鞋子，我们开始。 NOW, IF EVERYONE WILL REMOVE THEIR SHOES, WE'LL BEGIN.
首先，你会拿到你的红松服装， FIRST, YOU'LL BE HANDED YOUR RED PINE OUTFITS,
交出你所有的私人物品 HANDING OVER ALL YOUR PERSONAL BELONGINGS
在你逗留期间。 FOR THE DURATION OF YOUR STAY.
然后你们每个人会在体育馆分到一张床 THEN YOU'LL EACH BE ASSIGNED A COT IN THE GYMNASIUM
准备好之前你会睡在哪里 WHERE YOU WILL SLEEP UNTIL YOU'RE READY
你的任务的第二部分。 FOR THE SECOND PART OF YOUR QUESTS.
鞋…… SHOES...
杰伊：谢谢。 JAY: THANK YOU.
她想见见她孙子的未婚妻 AND SHE WANTS TO MEET HER GRANDSON'S FIANCEE
之前…… BEFORE...
嗯，在她死之前。 WELL, BEFORE SHE DIES.
曼尼：我知道这是最后一刻， MANNY: I KNOW IT'S KIND OF LAST MINUTE,
但她病得很重。 BUT SHE GOT REALLY SICK.
哦，不，他们认为这是什么？ OH NO, WHAT DO THEY THINK IT IS?
苍老。 OLDNESS.
是啊，你知道的。 YEAH, YOU KNOW HOW IT IS.
桑托斯先生：（叹气） MR. SANTOS: (SIGHS)
我不确定，曼努埃拉。 I'M NOT SURE, MANUELA.
到目前为止， IT'S SO FAR,
让你用我的车… LETTING YOU USE MY CAR...
让我紧张。 MAKES ME NERVOUS.
我知道你的车对你有多重要。 I KNOW HOW MUCH YOUR CAR MEANS TO YOU.
你可以放心把孩子交给我， YOU CAN TRUST ME WITH YOUR BABY,
还有曼尼。 AND WITH MANNY TOO.
只要你不让曼纽拉开车就行。 AS LONG AS YOU KEEP MANUELA FROM GETTING BEHIND THE WHEEL.
她一点儿也不会开车。 SHE CAN'T DRIVE FOR BEANS.
她有可靠的人照顾。 SHE IS IN SAFE HANDS.
把我当成一个…代孕父亲。 THINK OF ME AS A... A SURROGATE FATHER.
电子战。 EW.
(仪式鼓) (RITUALISTIC DRUMMING)
(蟋蟀唧唧声) (CRICKETS CHIRP)
(鼓持续) (DRUMMING CONTINUES)
（汽笛鸣响） (AIR HORN BLASTS)
白灵熊：30秒，各位。 SPIRIT BEAR: THIRTY SECONDS, PEOPLE.
床卷了，来了圈。 BEDS ROLLED, COME TO THE CIRCLE.
（急促地拖着脚步，低声说话） (HURRIED SHUFFLING, LOW CHATTER)
你的好。 YOUR OKAY.
彼得：跳舞，带带子。 PETER: DARCE, THE STRAPS.
带子，带子。 THE STRAPS, THE STRAPS.
白灵熊：五，四， SPIRIT BEAR: FIVE, FOUR,
三,二, THREE, TWO,
（秒表哔哔声）时间到了。 (STOPWATCH BEEPS) TIME.
这太蠢了！ THIS IS SO STUPID!
这怎么能治好我？ HOW IS THIS SUPPOSED TO FIX ME?
这些技能会帮到你的 THESE SKILLS ARE GONNA HELP YOU
在这周的旅程中。 DURING THIS WEEK'S JOURNEY.
达西:旅程?噢。 DARCY: JOURNEY? OOOH.
在DEGRASSI吗? AROUND DEGRASSI?
（傻笑）在野外。 (SMIRKS) IN THE WILD.
我们在为你的户外单人任务做准备。 WE'RE PREPPING YOU FOR YOUR OUTDOOR SOLO QUESTS.
等一等。 HOLD ON.
你要把我们丢在外面？ YOU'RE LEAVING US OUTSIDE?
独自一人吗? ALONE?
你疯了吗？！ ARE YOU CRAZY?!
回到你们的床上； BACK IN YOUR BEDS PEOPLE;
我们要一直做下去，直到每个人都做对为止。 WE'RE GONNA DO THIS UNTIL EVERYONE GETS IT RIGHT.
（不满的呻吟声） (MOANS OF DISCONTENT)
♪♪♪ ♪♪♪
（努力的咕噜声） (GRUNT OF EFFORT)
曼尼：（笑）天啊，阿什利。 MANNY: (CHUCKLES) GEEZ, ASHLEY.
你里面有什么，你的问题吗？ WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN THERE, YOUR ISSUES?
希礼：永远不知道你在路上会需要什么。 ASHLEY: NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU'LL NEED ON THE ROAD.
（钥匙从插口转动并发出叮当声） (KEYS CRANK FROM SOCKET AND JINGLE)
呃,什么? EH, WHAT?
你开车吗? YOU'RE DRIVING?
（低声）好吧。 (UNDER BREATH) ALL RIGHT.
试想一下, JUST THINK,
总有一天它会变成一辆小货车 ONE DAY THIS WILL BE A MINIVAN
后面坐着小矮人。 WITH LITTLE HOGART MUNCHKINS IN THE BACK.
曼尼：你在开玩笑吧？ MANNY: YOU'RE KIDDING ME, RIGHT?
好吧，小霍加特·桑托斯·芒奇金。 FINE, LITTLE HOGART-SANTOS MUNCHKINS.
海登，别打你妹妹了，达科塔。 HAYDEN, STOP HITTING YOUR SISTER, DAKOTA.
哦，把裤子穿上。 OH, PUT YOUR PANTS ON.
你真像你妈妈！ YOU ARE JUST LIKE YOUR MOTHER!
杰，别闹了。 JAY, KNOCK IT OFF.
你想一个人走回家吗，麦迪逊？ DO YOU WANNA WALK HOME ALONE, MADISON?
曼尼:停!停! MANNY: STOP! STOP!
我做不到！ I CAN'T DO THIS!
这个假订婚本应该给我自由， THIS FAKE ENGAGEMENT WAS SUPPOSED TO GIVE ME FREEDOM,
但你把我吓坏了 BUT YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT WITH ALL THE...
明年这个，某天那个。 NEXT YEAR THIS AND SOMEDAY THAT.
你不能来。 YOU'RE NOT COMING.
等我回家，我要告诉我父母 WHEN I GET BACK HOME I'M TELLING MY PARENTS
订婚取消了。 THAT THE ENGAGEMENT'S OFF.
我们会发生什么？ AND WHAT HAPPENS TO US?
我让一个男人控制了我的一生， I'VE LET ONE MAN CONTROL ME MY WHOLE LIFE,
我不会再那么做了。 I'M NOT ABOUT TO DO THAT AGAIN.
杰伊:PFFFT !很好。 JAY: PFFFT! FINE.
随便你。我走回家。 SUIT YOURSELF. I'LL WALK HOME.
玩得开心，女士们。 HAVE FUN, LADIES.
哦!哦,等等! OH! OH, WAIT!
我的样片？ MY DEMO REEL?
（cd盒发出叮当声，包发出沙沙声） (CD CASES CLATTER, BAG RUSTLES)
所以，我能… SO, CAN I...
猎枪呢? SHOTGUN?
（发动汽车） (STARTS CAR UP)
旋转器：（用力的咕噜声） SPINNER: (GRUNT OF EFFORT)
吉米：（砰砰地敲车门） JIMMY: (THUMPS CAR DOOR)
(巨大的) (THUMPING)
喂? HELLO?
曼尼：我一直生活在谎言中，为了生计…… MANNY: I'VE BEEN LIVING A LIE AND MAKING A LIVING...
哟,杰伊? YO, JAY?
我以为你现在已经上路了？ I THOUGHT YOU'D BE ON THE ROAD BY NOW?
看看她，她太棒了。 LOOK AT HER, I MEAN SHE'S SO GOOD.
曼尼：我不能再和你这样下去了…… MANNY: I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE WITH YOU...
曼尼的小样？ THAT MANNY'S DEMO?
她试镜不需要这个吗？ DOESN'T SHE NEED THAT FOR HER AUDITION?
我们吵架了，所以 WE HAD A FIGHT, SO,
我给了她一张我们亲热的DVD。 I GAVE HER A DVD OF US MAKING OUT INSTEAD.
哦! OOPS!
想要进史密斯代尔大学就到此为止了。 SO MUCH FOR GETTING INTO SMITHDALE.
吉米:所以… JIMMY: SO...
你基本上毁了所有的机会 YOU BASICALLY RUINED ANY CHANCE
她想做什么就做什么 OF HER DOING WHAT SHE WANTS
用她的生命。 WITH HER LIFE.
恭喜你，你这个混蛋。 CONGRATULATIONS, YOU JACKASS.
天啊，我到底怎么了！ GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!
(笑) (CHUCKLES)
我需要交换那些dvd。 I NEED TO SWAP THOSE DVDS.
你得找到她，摆平一切。 YOU GOTTA FIND HER, SET IT RIGHT.
斯宾纳：亲自去史密斯代尔。 SPINNER: IN PERSON, AT SMITHDALE.
（摇滚音乐开始） (ROCK MUSIC BEGINS)
你呃…… YOU UH...
你们有两个人的房间吗 DO YOU HAVE ROOM FOR TWO DUDES
你车里有轮椅吗？ AND A WHEELCHAIR IN YOUR CAR?
(卡车隆隆地) (TRUCK RUMBLES)
♬我想活下去，我可以品尝它♬ ♪ I want to survive I can taste it ♪
♬我想要…♪ ♪ I wanna... ♪
♬我想活下去，我可以品尝它……♪ ♪ I want to survive I can taste it... ♪
自从我朋友刺伤了那孩子， JOHNNY: EVER SINCE MY FRIEND STABBED THAT KID,
我想你可以说我有点偏离轨道了。 I GUESS YOU CAN SAY I'VE SORTA BEEN OFF THE RAILS.
然后我想， AND THEN I THOUGHT,
“我为什么要这么混蛋” "WHY DO I GOTTA BE SUCH A JERK?"
和… AND...
不管怎样，我不知道。 WHATEVER, I DON'T KNOW.
白灵熊：谢谢你，勇士。 SPIRIT BEAR: THANK YOU, WARRIOR.
接下来,嗯… NEXT, UM...
彼得。 PETER.
你重生的象征名字是…？ YOUR SYMBOLIC REBIRTH NAME IS...?
维京人。 VIKING.
很酷,不是吗? COOL, EH?
精灵熊：维京人，今天是什么风把你吹来的？ SPIRIT BEAR: VIKING, WHAT BROUGHT YOU HERE TODAY?
彼得：我…… PETER: I UH...
我确实崩溃了。 I DID CRACK.
可卡因。 CRACK COCAINE.
然后我嗯… AND THEN I UM...
我偷了一辆车， I STOLE A CAR AND UH,
把它撞到墙上。 DROVE IT INTO A WALL.
喝醉了。 DRUNK.
请把这个递给达西？ PASS THAT TO DARCY PLEASE?
（象征性的护身符叮当作响） (SYMBOLIC TALISMAN CLINKS)
我无话可说。 I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.
达西，我们都带着伤疤。 DARCY, WE ALL COME WITH SCARS.
这个家庭是来帮忙的 THIS FAMILY IS HERE TO HELP-
我甚至不跟我真正的家人说话， I DON'T EVEN TALK TO MY REAL FAMILY,
我为什么要跟你说话？ WHY WOULD I TALK TO YOU?
你选择了象征重生的名字吗？ DID YOU CHOOSE YOUR SYMBOLIC REBIRTH NAME?
我不知道。凤凰城吗? I DON'T KNOW. PHOENIX?
在神话中，凤凰死后又复活。 IN MYTHS, THE PHOENIX DIES AND RISES AGAIN.
富有洞察力的选择。 INSIGHTFUL CHOICE.
♪♪♪ ♪♪♪
♪哦!♪ ♪ Oh! ♪
♬哦哦哦 ♪ Oh oh oh ♪
♬该你了，宝贝 ♪ It's your turn, why you baby ♪
♬该你了，噢噢噢噢 ♪ It's your turn, Oh oh oh ♪
♬该你了，快把我逼疯吧 ♪ It's your turn, drive me crazy ♪
♬该你了，噢噢噢噢 ♪ It's your turn, Oh oh oh ♪
♬我对你有一种渴望，宝贝 ♪ I've got a burnin for ya baby ♪
♬让我站在炉火边……♪ ♪ Let me stand next to the fire... ♪
（曼尼的手机响了） (MANNY'S CELL PHONE RINGS)
曼尼：哦，那可能是我父母。 MANNY: OH, THAT'S PROBABLY MY PARENTS.
进站。 PIT STOP.
妈妈! MOM!
阿什利：你们都打算明年去史密斯戴尔吗？ ASHLEY: SO YOU GUYS ALL PLANNING ON GOING TO SMITHDALE NEXT YEAR?
这是我众多选择之一。 ENH, IT'S ONE OF MY MANY OPTIONS.
我妈妈以前的姐妹会想要我。 MY MOM'S OLD SORORITY WANTS ME.
我在考虑，但这次旅行？ I'M THINKING ABOUT IT, BUT THIS TRIP?
只要能出去就行 ANYTHING TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE
自从斯内克下班回家后。你吗? SINCE SNAKE'S BEEN HOME FROM WORK. YOU?
事实上，我买了票 UM, ACTUALLY, I SCORED TICKETS
去紫龙神秘演唱会。 TO THE PURPLE DRAGON MYSTERY CONCERT.
你是怎么拿到机票的？ HOW'D YOU GET THE TIX?
阿希礼：嗯，我有一个联系。 ASHLEY: UM, I HAVE A CONNECTION.
我也许能让你们进去。 I CAN PROBABLY GET YOU GUYS IN.
自由：听起来很疯狂！ LIBERTY: SOUNDS WILD!
嘿，你妈妈说什么了？ HEY, WHAT DID YOUR MOM SAY?
霍加特奶奶感觉好多了。 GRANDMA HOGART IS FEELING A LOT BETTER.
（手机响了） (CELL PHONE RINGS)
说曹操，曹操到，是她孙子。 SPEAK OF THE DEVIL, IT'S HER GRANDSON.
直接转到语音信箱。 STRAIGHT TO VOICE MAIL.
不!不! NO! NO!
别给我接通你那愚蠢的语音信箱！ DO NOT PUT ME THROUGH TO YOUR STUPID FULL VOICE MAIL!
斯宾纳：伙计，别放弃。 SPINNER: DUDE, DON'T GIVE UP.
是啊，不只是因为我们才走了一半。 YEAH, NOT JUST 'CAUSE WE'RE ONLY HALFWAY THERE.
我是说，我不知道该跟你说什么。 I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU, MAN.
爱最好的…当它痛得如此厉害。 LOVE'S BEST... WHEN IT HURTS SO GOOD.
斯宾纳：好吧，我说。 SPINNER: WELL, SAID.
杰伊：我们之间结束了。 JAY: IT IS OVER BETWEEN US.
我越快忘记曼尼越好。 THE SOONER I GET OVER MANNY, THE BETTER.
你知道怎么忘掉一个女孩吗？ AND YOU KNOW HOW TO GET OVER A GIRL?
到另一个下面去。 GET UNDER ANOTHER ONE.
不,不要……不要停止。 NO, DON'T... DON'T STOP.
来吧，伙计，继续开， SPINNER: C'MON MAN, JUST KEEP DRIVING,
来吧。 C'MON.
继续驾驶过去的命运？ KEEP DRIVING PAST DESTINY?
(笑)一半 (HALF LAUGHS)
彼得:噢!噢! PETER: OW! OW!
达西：哦，天哪，你还好吗？ DARCY: OH MY- ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
彼得:是的。噢。 PETER: YES. OW.
愚蠢的岩石;那些东西让我绝望了。 STUPID ROCK; HOPELESS WITH THOSE THINGS.
也许是“快克可卡因”的缘故。 MAYBE IT'S THE "CRACK COCAINE."
让我猜猜， LET ME GUESS,
你的父母需要抛弃你 YOUR PARENTS NEEDED TO DITCH YOU
春假期间？ OVER SPRING BREAK?
两个，分别。 BOTH OF THEM, SEPARATELY.
只有你知道。 ONLY YOU WOULD KNOW THAT.
那你的轻罪是什么？ SO, WHAT'S THE MISDEMEANOR?
你参加过街头赛车，毒品丑闻， YOU'VE DONE STREET RACING, DRUG SCANDAL,
噢!还有网上的女孩——两次。 OOH! AND GIRLS ON INTERNET - TWICE.
我在红松的名单上看到了你的名字。 I SAW YOUR NAME ON THE RED PINE'S LIST.
所以，我给自己报名了。 SO, I SIGNED MYSELF UP.
你做了吗? YOU DID?
我跟我妈说就像… I TOLD MY MOM IT'D BE LIKE...
治疗。 THERAPEUTIC.
另外，我想，你知道， PLUS, I THOUGHT, YOU KNOW,
如果我能和你在一起… IF I COULD BE WITH YOU...
谢谢你，彼得。 THANK YOU, PETER.
我要去洗手间 I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM,
五分钟后在大厅见。 BUT MEET ME IN THE HALL IN LIKE FIVE MINUTES.
♪♪♪ ♪♪♪
（车门砰的一声） (CAR DOORS SLAM)
林赛：准时！你稳操胜券 LINDSAY: RIGHT ON TIME! YOU'D BE A SHOO-IN
即使你不是遗产新人！ EVEN IF YOU WEREN'T A LEGACY PLEDGE!
守时是习惯之一 PUNCTUALITY IS ONE OF THE HABITS
非常成功的人。 OF HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE.
所以…你对年会感到兴奋吗 SO... ARE YOU EXCITED FOR THE ANNUAL
明天的社交礼仪？ ETIQUETTE SOCIAL TOMORROW?
是啊，第一次是我们妈妈办的。 YEAH, OUR MOTHERS HELD THE FIRST ONE.
曼尼：哇，社交礼仪？方当事人! MANNY: WOW, ETIQUETTE SOCIAL? PARTY-PARTY!
那么，音乐会上见？ SO, AH, SEE YOU AT THE CONCERT?
怎么，你不留在这里了？ WHAT, YOU'RE NOT STAYING HERE?
我有地方住了。 I'VE GOT A PLACE TO STAY.
林赛：哦，也许你们可以帮助我的兄弟们 LINDSAY: OH, MAYBE YOU GIRLS COULD HELP MY BROTHERS
用这个装置吗？ WITH THE SET UP?
曼尼：那些是你的兄弟？ MANNY: THOSE ARE YOUR BROTHERS?
友爱兄弟。 FRATERNITY BROTHERS.
我爱这个家。 I LOVE THIS FAMILY.
艾玛:(笑) EMMA: (LAUGHS)
达西：快点，我们时间不多了。 DARCY: HURRY, WE DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME.
彼得：我们为什么在这里？ PETER: WHY ARE WE HERE?
我们需要避孕套，对吧？ WE'RE GONNA NEED A CONDOM, RIGHT?
避孕套吗? CONDOM?
你想做爱吗？ YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX?
达西：我只是想把往事一笔勾销 DARCY: I JUST WANT TO WIPE THE SLATE CLEAN
和你一起重新开始。 AND START OVER, WITH YOU.
(门关闭) (DOOR SHUTS)
不,达西。 NO, DARCY.
我不知道。这不是…… I DON'T KNOW. THIS ISN'T...
请,彼得。 PLEASE, PETER.
我只是想让一切回到过去 I JUST WANT THINGS TO GO BACK
回到我们之前的状态。 TO WHAT WE HAD BEFORE.
我以为你想等 I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO WAIT -
为了你的王子，为了你完美的婚礼？ FOR YOUR PRINCE, YOUR PERFECT WEDDING?
彼得, PETER,
你是我的王子，好吗？ YOU ARE MY PRINCE, OKAY?
请, PLEASE,
你说过你愿意做任何事。 YOU SAID YOU'D DO ANYTHING.
(激情热吻) (PASSIONATE KISSING)
（软粒软糖嗒嗒地放进杯子，音乐响起） (JELLYBEANS CLATTER INTO CUP, MUSIC PLAYS)
曼尼：所以，嗯…… MANNY: SO, UM...
你是哪个兄弟会的？领头狗？ WHAT FRAT ARE YOU FROM? THE ALPHA DOGS?
本：（干笑）真有趣。 BEN: (DRY LAUGH) THAT'S FUNNY.
我可以带你回狗狗收容所， YOU KNOW, I COULD TAKE YOU BACK TO THE DOG POUND,
带你四处看看。 SHOW YOU AROUND.
毕竟是空的。 IT IS EMPTY AFTER ALL.
(笑) (CHUCKLES)
一个带着糖果的陌生人？ A STRANGER WITH CANDY?
不如从你的名字开始吧？ WHY DON'T WE START WITH YOUR NAME?
我们为什么不匿名呢？ WHY DON'T WE KEEP THIS ANONYMOUS?
我是说，听着，我了解女孩。 I MEAN, HEY, LISTEN, I KNOW GIRLS.
我是说，首先是名字 I MEAN, FIRST IT'S NAMES
然后我要去见你的父母， AND THEN I GOTTA MEET YOUR PARENTS,
然后我就戴上了戒指。 AND THEN NEXT THING I KNOW I GOT A RING ON MY FINGER.
喜欢这个吗？ LIKE THIS ONE?
我不会告诉你未婚夫的。 I WON'T TELL YOUR FIANCE.
好，回头见，无名氏。 YEAH, SEE YOU LATER, ANONYMOUS.
PFFFT ! PFFFT!
（车门砰的一声）（走近的脚步声） (CAR DOOR SLAMS) (APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS)
杰西卡:噢。 JESSICA: OH.
车麻烦吗? CAR TROUBLE?
现在不是了。 NOT ANY MORE.
多亏了我的制服骑士。 THANKS TO MY KNIGHT IN COVERALLS.
我在这等你走。 I'LL STAND BY TILL YOU'RE MOVING.
杰西卡：你救了我。 JESSICA: YOU SAVED ME.
我欠你的。 I OWE YOU.
我怎么感谢你都不为过。 I CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH.
但是今晚有个海滩派对。 BUT THERE'S A BEACH PARTY TONIGHT.
（远处汽车呼啸而过） (CARS WHIR IN THE DISTANCE)
如果你喜欢汽车和比基尼。 IF YOU LIKE CARS AND BIKINIS.
很诱人，但是…… IT'S TEMPTING, BUT UM...
但我穿比基尼很难看，所以… BUT I LOOK LIKE CRAP IN A BIKINI, SO...
好好享受聚会吧。 ENJOY THE PARTY.
（车门打开） (CAR DOOR OPENS)
我知道。好吧，我知道。 I KNOW. OKAY, I KNOW.
双手放在脑后。 HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
什么! ? WHAT!?
双手放在脑后。 HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
这辆卡车被报失窃 THIS TRUCK HAS BEEN REPORTED STOLEN,
你们跟我来。 YOU GUYS ARE COMING WITH ME.
(手铐提前) (HANDCUFFS SNAP)
♪♪♪ ♪♪♪
你没事吧? YOU OKAY?
是的，我很好。 YEAH, I'M FINE.
你吗? YOU?
彼得:太好了。 PETER: GREAT.
我是说，我们做爱了。 I MEAN, WE HAD SEX.
它是……还好吗？ WAS IT... WAS IT OKAY?
我想是的。 I THINK SO.
（灯亮，汽笛响） (LIGHT CLICKS ON, AIR HORN BLASTS)
得到他们! GOT 'EM!
谢谢你， THANKS TO YOU,
明天我们都提前一个小时起床 WE ALL GET UP AN HOUR EARLIER TOMORROW
你会告诉所有人的。 AND YOU'LL GET TO TELL EVERYONE.
学生：嗯，她没有告诉我。 STUDENT: WELL, SHE DIDN'T TELL ME ABOUT THAT.
真不敢相信你在熨衣服。 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE IRONING.
请原谅我想做准备 EXCUSE ME FOR WANTING TO PREPARE
为了我人生中最重要的一天。 FOR THE BIGGEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
艾米，你能再检查一下我的样片吗？ EM, CAN YOU DOUBLE CHECK MY DEMO REEL?
哦，样片？让我看! OOH, DEMO REEL? LEMME SEE!
（dvd的缩放和嗡嗡声） (DVD ZOOMS AND WHIRS)
（亲吻和傻笑） (KISSING AND GIGGLING)
(喘息) (GASPS)
这是引起注意的一种方法。 THAT'S ONE WAY TO GET NOTICED.
利伯缇：啊，这是莎士比亚的什么作品？ LIBERTY: AH, WHAT WORK OF SHAKESPEARE IS THIS?
“鼩鼱的驼背？” "THE HUMPING OF THE SHREW?"
噢,不! OH NO!
杰一定是把我的小样换了 JAY MUST'VE SWITCHED MY DEMO FOR-
利伯缇：“仲夏夜的梦遗？” LIBERTY: "A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S WET DREAM?"
(笑着说) (LAUGHING)
我要杀了他！我的手机呢？ I'M GONNA KILL HIM! WHERE'S MY PHONE?
自由：还是“阴茎商人？” LIBERTY: OR "THE MERCHANT OF PENIS?"
(笑着说) (LAUGHING)
(生气) (IRRITATED GRUNT)
（笔记本电脑夹紧）停！ (LAPTOP CLAMPS SHUT) STOP!
你能给你爸爸打电话吗？ CAN YOU CALL YOUR DAD?
他是个律师。 HE'S A LAWYER.
从监狱?你疯了吗？ FROM JAIL? ARE YOU NUTS?
（手机响了） (CELL PHONE RINGS)
一个叫曼尼的家伙？ SOME GUY NAMED MANNY?
（结巴）我要跟她谈谈！ (STAMMERS) I NEED TO TALK TO HER!
（电话砰的一声落在桌子上） (PHONE THUDS ONTO TABLE)
熄灯，女士们。 LIGHTS OUT, LADIES.
不要让你的皮肤直接接触床垫。 DON'T LET YOUR SKIN TOUCH THE MATTRESS DIRECTLY.
（难以置信地呼出） (EXHALE OF DISBELIEF)