我给你们定一个节奏 好吗 一 二 三 四 I'm gonna give you a rhythm, all right? One, two, three, four.
一 二 三 四 配合它 One, two, three, four. Wait for it.
一 二 三 四 一 二 三 四 One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four.
一 二 三 One, two, three...
好的 大声点 大家敲得大声点 All right, louder. Everybody louder.
再大声点 再大声点 Louder! Louder!
用力 发疯似的敲 加油 Go crazy! Go crazy with it! Come on.
再大点声 Louder!
我觉得做得很好 很感谢你 I think that went really well. Thank you so much.
我和一个叫Jimmy Coghill的人在那棵树后面打过架 I had a fight with a guy called Jimmy Coghill behind that tree.
真的吗 你赢了吗 Did you really? Did you win?
没有 他把我打得半死 No, he knocked seven tons of shit out of me.
这儿有过一个叫Hargreaves的后勤 他还在工作吗 There was an orderly here by the name of Hargreaves. Is he still going?
很抱歉 Ian 这是之前的事了 I'm sorry, Ian. It was a while ago,
Hargreaves先生已经自杀了 but Mr Hargreaves took his own life.
他在一个阁楼里上吊了 He hanged himself up in one of the attics.
是的 这很可悲 Yeah, it's very sad.
这个消息让我很开心 真的 That has made my day, that has.
-再见 -再见 再次感谢你 -See you. -Yeah, thanks again.
我不再了解你了 I don't know who you are any more.
但你知道我不能接受什么吗 But you know what l really can't take?
是希望 It's the hope.
那种以为一切总会变好的希望 The hope that it's gonna get better.
但没有变好 不是吗 It's not, is it?
一切都是一盘散沙 Everything's out of joint.
我不知道我能否因为被臭骂而不再这样 I don't really know if l've got the bollocks to stop it.
你必须离开这里 Denny You've got to get out of here, Denny.
逃离这里 你只能自己去做 Run away. And you got to do it all by yourself.
你仍旧是我亲爱的人 我的家人 You'll still be my gracious, my family.
如果你忘记了这点 对你自己道歉 And if you ever forget that, act sorry for yourself,
我会回来 我会死死纠缠你 I'll come back and l'll bleedin' well haunt you.
你明白吗 You understand?
你好 我是Graham 我是麻痹症协会的 Hello, it's Graham, from the Spastics Society.
我们在电话上谈过的 We spoke on the phone.
充分参与 人人平等 这是我们的信条 ''full participation and equality for all.'' that's the motto.
联合国的残疾者之年是个巨大的契机 This United Nations Year Of The Disabled is a tremendous opportunity, you know,
让人们真正坐下来思考 to make people really sit up and think.
当然 我们会得到我们所需的帮助 Of course, we're going to need all the help we can get, so...
所以若你能东山再起不是很棒的事吗 wouldn't it be wonderful if you could get back on top again?
也许你有了新歌 也许又是大热单曲 谁知道呢 Maybe you get a new song, maybe another hit single. Who knows?
-联合国对此很热衷 -是吗 -The UN are very keen. -Are they?
我知道你曾经注入了表演因素 I understand you've been dabbling in a spot of acting.
是的 我曾有时像个恶棍 配合角色而已 Oh, yeah, l've played a few villains in me time. Typecast.
现在有个契机 让你重新介绍你自己 Well, here's an opportunity to introduce yourself all over again.
你知道 建立新的粉丝 新的开始 You know, a new fan base, new beginnings.
天哪 你的朋友好像走了 Oh, dear. Your friend seems to have gone.
你似乎陷入了一些困难 Well, look, you seem to be in a spot of trouble.
我能拉你一把吗 May l give you a lift?
是的 这样就太好了 Yeah. That'd be great.
真的 真的非常高兴你能回归 It's really... lt's really great to have you back.
浪子回头了 The prodigal son returns.
像我这样的老头 你得做个自私的疯子 真的 To be a geezer like me, you got to be a bit of a selfish loony, really.
根本无法时时刻刻 Can't bother too much about day and night
有时一个人的行为让他自己羞耻 And occasionally one's behaviour makes one ashamed of oneself.
我很开心听你这么说 Well, l'm glad to hear it.
不管怎样 这个残疾人之年 Anyway, this year of the disabled...
给了我们重回巅峰的机会 got a chance now to get back on top.
正规的合同已经签订了 所以 Proper deals going down, so...
所以 你有什么新的想法 So, what have you got?
当Tessie在巡逻中出了麻烦 when Tessie trouble's on patrol
Suzie的悲伤让你伤感 and Suzie sadness makes you blue
亲爱的Lennie进门 when Lennie love come through the door
这可不是 性&毒品&摇滚乐 Well, it's not sex, drugs & rock & roll, is it?
胡说 胡说 胡说 Bollocks, bollocks, bollocks.
该死的残疾人之年 Fucking year of disabled.
这就像什么 就像去年我们不错 I mean, it's like, what? Like, last year we was fine
明年我们会很棒 and next year is going to be great,
但是今年 就是今年 but this year, just this year,
我们都会成为一群该死的瘸子 不是吗 oh, we're all gonna be a right bunch of fucking cripples, aren't we, eh?
我们为何不组一个乐队呢 Why don't we just form a band?
我知道 我知道 我们称自己是麻痹与自闭者 I know, l know, we can call ourselves spastic and the autistics.
嘿 嘿 你这个流着口水摇摇晃晃乱涂乱画一瘸一拐 Oi, oi! You dribblin', wibblin', scribblin', cripplin' little
该死的一瘸一拐摇摇晃晃奇奇怪怪的麻痹症者 fucking hobblin', wobblin', bobblin' fantastic spastic!
我喜欢这个 I like it.
欢迎回来 我们都喜欢一点爵士乐 不是吗 And welcome back. Well, we all like a bit of jazz, don't we?
因此 转到我们下一个话题 And so, turning to our next item and
就是继续围绕联合国残疾者之年进行探讨 that's the continuing controversy surrounding the United Nations year of the disabled.
我们将听到Ian Drury的意见 We're going to hear from Ian Drury,
作为家喻户晓的朋克摇滚乐人 the housewife's favourite punk rocker,
他将"性&毒品&摇滚乐"这个词组创入英文词汇中 the man who put the phrase ''sex&drugs&rock&roll'' into the english language,
他的新歌 麻痹与自闭症者 and whose new song Spasticus Autisticus
被贴上了出格与激进的标签 has been labelled outrageous and offensive.
我们同样有来自麻痹症协会的Graham Hart We also have with us Graham Hart from the Spastics Society
来阐述如何在残疾者之年中充分参与 to talk about full participation in the year of the disabled.
-大家好 -那么 首先向你介绍 Ian Drury -Hello, there. -So, turning to you first, Ian Drury...
首先 我不是Drury或者Dreary或者Doory 我是Dury First of all, it's not Drury or Dreary or Doory, it's Dury.
但我想说的是 But l would like to say that, yeah,
我们都应该充分参与 l think we should all fully participate in
去制止Graham 堵住他满口的胡言 holding Graham down and chopping off his tiny little bollocks
-免得他变成一个懦弱的废物 -好的 Ian 谢谢 -for being a spineless little shit. -Right, Ian, thank you.
我认为这不是合适的时机与地点 I don't think this is the time or the place.
对 这不是合适的时机和地点 No, it's not the time or the place.
你说得对 永远都不合适 是吗 You're right. It never is, is it?
我非常抱歉 能请你原谅吗 I'm terribly sorry. Will you excuse me, please?
-强盗 -不 没人强求你不能做什么 -Bandit! -No, nobody has banned anything.
不 我是说你 你是个强盗 是个骗子 No, you. You're a bandit. You're a chiseller.
他们也不封杀瘸子 不是吗 Well, they don't ban cripples, either, do they, eh?
他们只是让瘸子难以发挥作用而已 They just make it difficult for them to function.
这首歌还在现在的时事节目上播放着 The song is still being played on current affairs programmes.
太棒了 这可真是太棒了 Great! yeah, that's great!
夜里所有的混蛋都缩在被子里 Late at night when all the raspberries are tucked up in bed,
没有做任何伤害他人的事 oh, not doing any harm to anybody.
是的 这被认为是激进的 Yes, well, it was found offensive.
我怎么会去找一个跟我一样残疾的人 How could l go up to somebody, right,
然后对他变得有攻击性? Who's got the same disabilities as me and be offensive?
不 不完全是说残疾人 No, not disabled people so much, no.
这首歌又不是写给你的 站着说话不腰疼 Well, it wasn't written for you, was it? Eh? The walkie-talkies!
这是像斯巴达克斯党一样的口号性歌曲 It's a war cry type of item, like ''spartacus!''
是的 如果我没记错 斯巴达克斯党被虐死了 Yes, well, if l remember correctly, spartacus was crucified.
是的 那我会伴随其左右 不是吗 Yeah, l'll be in good company, then, won't l?
感觉你写的歌并不是很有同情心 Look, it was felt that what you've written just isn't very sympathetic.
同情心? 生活没有同情心 不是吗 Sympathetic? Life ain't sympathetic, right?
我不是小Tim 我是Ian Dury I'm not tiny Tim. I am Ian Dury.
像我这样的残疾人不想要同情 我们想要尊重 People like me do not want sympathy. They want respect.
这是种浪费 明白吗 It's a waste. Okay?
人们认为你有机会做一些不同寻常的事 People felt you had the opportunity to do something remarkable.
得到皇冠般的荣耀 在离世后被永远记得 Your crowning glory, to be remembered after you've long gone.
我他妈才不在乎 I do not give a shit.
我才不管能不能像犹太教堂里的猪一样受欢迎 I don't care if l'm as popular as a Chinese pig in a synagogue.
我来这不是为了被记得 我来是为了活着 I am not here to be remembered, l'm here to be alive!
所以你带着你的不联合国 So you take your dis-united nations, right,
还有你的残疾人之年 插进你那该死的脊椎里 and your year of dissembling and stick it right up your fucking 'arris.
王八蛋 Cunt.
保持身体强壮 保持身体警觉 Keep your body strong, keep your guard up.
Ian 我需要休息一下 Ian, l need a rest. Ow.
Clive和我想要在一起 Clive and l want to be together.
我们不需要着急 下次再说吧 We don't wanna rush into that. Look what happened last time.
有些人最后会变成一场彻底的噩梦的 Some blokes turn out to be an absolute nightmare.
我想要离婚 Ian I want a divorce, Ian.
我仍然爱你 I still love you.
这与爱无关 傻瓜 It's not about love, silly.
你没有选择 It's not your choice.
让我走吧 Let me go.
走吧 你被炒鱿鱼了 Go on, you're fired.
亲爱的 Darling.
好一点了 Getting better.
你这次不会对我尖叫了吧 You're not gonna shout at me again, are you?
你喜欢上游泳了没 You actually been in yet?
放松点 小老虎 Oh, easy, tiger.
-妈妈怎么样了 -她很好 她会很好的 - How's mum? - She's fine. She's gonna be fine.
听着 结束了 Look, it's done.
我们得让阻挡我们的人离开 We had to let strangler go,
因为幕后的故事 'cause, well, the dramas backstage
远比台前的戏剧更加精彩 were getting better than the actual show.
儿子 对不起 Son, l'm sorry.
闭上眼睛 Close your eyes.
听话 闭上你的眼睛 Go on. Go on. Close your eyes.
你感觉到了吗 Can you feel that?
那是我的手 Well, that's my hand.
从现在到永远 我都会在那里 From now until forever, l will always be there.
在你的肩头上 Just above your shoulder.
好吗 All right?
我告诉你一件事 I'll tell you what, though.
我得到了电影里的一个角色 I've just been offered a part in a film.
饰演一个吃不饱饭的恶棍 To play an undernourished villain
在爱情里最终获得了胜利 who wins in the end through love.
你可以一起来 做我的助理 You could come with. Be my assistant.
如果你愿意的话 If you like.
-你不想看我游泳吗 -不了 你会做好的 -Don't you wanna watch me swim? -Nah. You'll be all right.
只需要记得 一直抬起你的头 Just remember, keep your head up,
一直踢水 试着不被淹下去 Keep kicking, try not to drown.
一个自由人死时 他失去了生的乐趣 "when a free man dies, he loses the pleasure of life.
一个奴隶失去了痛苦 "a slave loses his pain.
死亡就是奴隶所知的唯一自由 "death is the only freedom a slave knows.
就是为何奴隶不怕死 "'that's why he's not afraid of it.
这就是为何我们会成功 "that's why we'll win..."
坐好了 Sit properly.
-把你的鱼吃了 -不 难吃死了 - Eat your fish. - No! It's horrible.
你说什么 我怎么说你就得怎么做 What did you say? You do as you're told.
我说 不会吃这个 这太他妈难吃了 I said, l ain't eating that, it's fucking horrible!
一 二 三 One, two, three...
我是麻痹的 麻痹的 麻痹的自闭症者 I'm spasticus, spasticus spasticus autisticus.
我撒尿时摇摇晃晃 因为我中间的玩意神神秘秘 I wiggle when I piddle 'cause my middle is a riddle.
游吧 Swim!
游起来 游起来 从潜水中游起来 完了! Get up! Get up! Get up that dive board! Over!
把你得来不易的睾丸放进我的罐头里 So place your hard-earned peanuts in my tin
感谢造物主你不在我生活的国家里 and thank the creator you're not in the state I'm in.
长久以来我已厌倦被废弃 So long have I been languished on the shelf
我必须把我自己推向前进的方向里 I must give all proceedings to myself.
我是麻痹的 麻痹的 麻痹的自闭症者 I'm spasticus, spasticus spasticus autisticus
皮革和橡皮做的五十四个器具 54 appliances in leather and elastic
来自二十七个麻痹着的十万个感谢 1 00,000 thank-yous from 27 spastics
麻痹的 麻痹的 自闭症者 spasticus spasticus autisticus
我是麻痹的 麻痹的 麻痹的自闭症者 I'm spasticus, spasticus spasticus autisticus
流着口水摇摇晃晃欺人瞒己啃啃噬噬 dribbling, wiggling, fiddling, nibbling
欺人欺己摇摇晃晃的麻痹症者 fiddling, diddling, widdling, diddling spasticus
-我是麻痹症者 -我是麻痹症者 - I'm spasticus! - I'm spasticus!
我是麻痹症者 I'm spasticus!
-爸爸 -我是麻痹症者 - Dad! - I'm spasticus!
我是麻痹症者 I'm spasticus!
一二三四 我是麻痹症者 One, two, three, four spasticus!
Ian Ian Ian Ian! Ian! Ian!
这个故事的寓意是 And the moral of the story is
不要在故事里找什么寓意 don't go looking for morals in stories.
如果你想要什么讯息 去他妈的邮局找 If you want a message, fuck off down the post office.
曾有人问我是否失去过什么东西 Someone once asked me if I'd missed anything.
好吧 Well...
如果我从未有过漂亮的女孩 If I'd never had a good-looking girl,
很棒的工作 很酷的发型 a great job, great haircut,
那么也许我会抱怨 then I could complain,
但我错过的唯一东西 也就是几班公车 but the only thing I've ever missed is a few buses.
最后一首 Chazanoca One last time, Chazanova.
忧伤的Gene宝贝 blue Gene baby
现在 有好几种避免死亡的办法 Now, there are a couple of ways to avoid death.
其中一种是变得伟大 And one of them is to be magnificent.
而这是我最喜欢的方式 And this is my favourite way.
皮包骨的白种水手 skinny white sailor
机遇是瘦削的 the chances were slender
美貌是简洁的 the beauties were brief
我是否该用雷鸟酒与黑色手帕 shall I mourn your decline with some thunderbird wine
向你的衰老致以哀悼 and a black handkerchief?
我想念你的感伤 I miss your sad
维吉尼亚的耳语 Virginia whisper
我想念那声音 I miss the voice
呼唤着我的心灵 that called my heart
亲爱的Gene Vincent sweet Gene Vincent
年轻的 年老的 young and old
死去的你 and gone
傻瓜
你为何不回到床上去 why don't you get back into bed?
满足的原因 第三部分 reasons to be cheerful, part three
一些Buddy Holly的音乐 some of Buddy Holly
有稳定的工作 the working folly
Good Golly Miss Molly这首歌 Good Golly Miss Molly
还有船上游行 and boats
汉密斯宫 Hammersmith Palais,
莫斯科大剧院 the Bolshoi Ballet
Tutti Frutti这首歌 jump back in the alley
还有会做牛奶的保姆 add nanny goats
Scammells的摩托厂 Domineker Camels 18-Wheeler Scammells, Domineker Camels
其他哺乳动物 all other mammals plus
公平选举权 equal votes
逛逛皮卡迪利大街 seeing piccadilly,
Fanny Smith 和Willy三个人在一起 Fanny Smith and Willy
做个傻呵呵的人 being rather silly
还有燕麦粥 and porridge oats
一点点逆来顺受 a bit of grin and bear it,
一点点人人共享 a bit of come and share it
说一些文明用语 you're welcome, we can spare it
还有鲜亮的黄色袜子 yellow socks
因矮小而不自大 too short to be haughty,
太疯狂而不调皮 too nutty to be naughty
四十岁生活正开始 going on 40,
不被用上电击疗法 no electric shocks
来点萝卜汁 the juice of the carrot,
鹦鹉罕见的笑容 the smile of the parrot
一点葡萄酒 任何摇滚的事物 a little drop of claret, anything that rocks
猫王和Scotty Elvis and Scotty
没有得痤疮的日子 days when I ain't spotty
坐在马桶上大便 sitting on the potty,
治好天花的毛病 curing smallpox
这些是快乐的原因 第三部分 reasons to be cheerful, part three
这些是快乐的原因 一 二 三 reasons to be cheerful one, two, three
一二三 One, two, three
卫生服务处提供的眼镜 Health Service glasses
妓男和妓女 gigolos and brasses
浑圆或瘦削的屁股 round or skinny bottoms
带妈妈去巴黎 take your mum to paris
点亮一盏圣杯 lighting up the chalice
我亲爱的Willie Harris wee Willie Harris
Bantu Stephen Biko的传奇 Bantu Stephen Biko,
听听Rico的音乐 Harpo Groucho Chico的喜剧 listening to rico harpo, Harpo, Groucho, Chico
切达奶酪和腌菜 cheddar cheese and pickle
Vincent Motorsickle的音乐 the Vincent Motorsickle
来点性的挑逗 slap and tickle
Woody Allen的电影 Dali的画 Dimitri和Pasquale的歌剧 Woody Allen, Dali, Dimitri and Pasquale
月光奏鸣曲和意大利老歌 balabalabala and Volare
学起来很棒的东西 something nice to study
给好兄弟打电话 phoning up a buddy
赤身裸体 being in my nuddy
愉快地说可以 saying okey-dokey,
跟着Smokie乐队唱歌 singalong-a-smokie
从监狱里跑出来 coming out of chokey
John Coltrane的萨克斯风 John Coltrane's soprano,
Adi Celentano的音乐 Adi Celentano
Bonar Colleano的电影 Bonar Colleano
这些是快乐的原因 第三部分 reasons to be cheerful, part three
这些是快乐的原因 一二三 reasons to be cheerful one, two, three
是的 亲爱的 yes, yes, dear, dear
也许明年或者永远 perhaps next year or maybe even never
无论如何 in which case
这些是快乐的原因 第三部分 reasons to be cheerful, part three
这些是快乐的原因 一二三 reasons to be cheerful one, two, three
这些是快乐的原因 第三部分 reasons to be cheerful, part three
这些是快乐的原因 一二三 reasons to be cheerful one, two, three
Johnny Johnny!
这些是快乐的原因 一二三 reasons to be cheerful one, two, three
一二三 one, two, three
现在 你们都滚吧 你们被炒鱿鱼了 Now, fuck off all of you. You're fired!
滚开去变得伟大吧 And go and be magnificent!