? ?
[M Man ] ??If their love's on skids treat your folks like kids??
?? Or your family tree's gonna snap??
[M Woman ] ??So to make 'em dig first ya gotta rig??
[M Together ] ?? What do ya gotta rig??
?? The parent trap??
[M Woman ] ??If they lose that zing and they just won't swing??
?? Then the problem falls in your lap??
[M Man ] ?? When your folks are square then you must prepare??
- ?? What do you gotta prepare?? - ?? The parent trap??
[ Both Yawning ]
[M Together ] ?? To set the bait recreate the date??
?? The first time Cupid shot 'em??
?? Get 'em under the moon play their favorite tune??
John.
Marcia.
?? You got 'em??
[M Man ] ??Lead 'em back to love with a velvet glove??
[M Woman ] ?? 'Cause they're much too old for the strap??
[M Together ] ??Straighten up their mess with togetherness??
?? Togetherness The parent trap??
John, they're playing our song.
Marcia, what fools we've been.
??Straighten out their mess with togetherness??
?? Togetherness??
??Straighten out their mess with togetherness??
?? Togetherness??
?? The parent trap????
[M Girls Chattering, Clamoring Loudly ]
[M Woman ] Now, now there, girls, Now, now,
''A''to ''K's''over here, ''A''to ''K's''over--
No, dear, you're an ''R''. Over there with the ''P'' to ''S's.''
That's a good girl. Now, have we any ''X, Y, Z's'' here?
- Where are the ''X, Y, Z's''? - Now here are your allergy pills.
Your grandmother said to remind you one three times a day. And your insect repellant.
And your poetry book.
- Thank you, Staimes. - Have a good summer, miss.
[ Chattering, Clamoring Continues ]
- Name? - McKendrick, Sharon.
- 1 8 Belgrave Square, Boston? - Yes.
And my grandmother said to see that my tent was properly ventilated.
Don't worry, McKendrick. You'll be ventilated.
NeXt girl.
No candy wrappers. No chewing gum wrappers lying on the ground.
Always tidy.
Latrines over there. Mess hall up the hill.
McKendrick, you're in here, Arapahoe. Follow me. Girls, wait here for me.
Come, McKendrick.
- New arrival, girls. Name's McKendrick. - Hi.
- Hello. - Girls here'll brief you on anything you need to know.
I'm sure you'll be very happy here.
See you after lunch.
My name is Betsy. This is Ursula.
How do you do? [ Clears Throat ] I'm Sharon McKendrick.
- ????[M Bugle Playing Reveille ] - [ Girls Shouting ]
Say, you're in a good tent.
Betsy's mother sends her all kinds of candy bars and chocolates every week.
- I'm not allowed to eat candy. - Why not?
My grandmother thinks it ruins my teeth.
Oh, hi, Mary Sue.
Well, come on, let's go. I'm starved.
Oh, yeah,just as long as there are three places.
Oh, is that-- Oh.
- The nerve of her, coming here with your face! - What are you gonna do about it?
Do? What in heaven's name can I do, silly?
I'd bite off her nose, then she wouldn't look like you.
- Who's she? - [M Bell Ringing ]
- I never saw her before in my life. - Now...
at this time...
I want to say welcome to all our new arrivals.
Welcome to Camp Inch, new arrivals,
I am your supreme commander here,
And my name is... Miss Inch.
- Uh, yes, Miss Inch. - [ Girls Chuckle Softly ]
I'd like at this time to introduce a visitor...
from the neXt hilltop over.
From the Thunderhead Boys Camp,
Chief Eaglewood,
Welcome.
Thank you, Miss Inch. And hello there, out there to all of you.
Uh, looks like a crackerjack troop of girls there.
Now, why am I here?
Well, that's our little surprise,
Trooper Stafford, attention. Stand up, boy.
- Ohh, what a dream! - [ Girls Giggling ]
A little surprise for you, young ladies.
Saturday night we're going to have a dance.
[ Girls Screaming ]
Now, quiet, girls, quiet.
And we've asked the Thunderhead Boys Camp...
to come over for the occasion.
Camp Thunderhead accepts your invitation and thanks you.
- [ Girls Screaming, Cheering ] - [M Bell Ringing ]
A word of warning.
Watch your demerits.
Untidy little girls won't go to the dance.
So keep those tents clean,
your uniforms spanking fresh...
and we'll all be one big happy family.
[ Sighs ]
[ Chattering ]
- [ Laughing ] - With that toad?
Oh, no.
What are you staring at?
EXcuse me, but haven't you noticed? We look like each other.
Hey, wait a minute. Turn your head. Let me see that profile.
That's who it is, Look at that profile,
- She's the spittin'image of you-know-who, - Who?
- Frankenstein. - [ Laughing ]
Not wanted.
[ Screaming ]
[ Gasping ]
????[M Reveille ]
[ Girls Chattering ]
- [ Screams ] - [ High-Pitched Scream ]
[ Screams ] Those monsters! They gopher-trapped us!
[ High-Pitched Screams ]
- Morning, Miss Inch. - Good morning, Miss Grunecker.
- Where would you like to start? - Well--
Why not start with tent Arapahoe?
I'm sure you'll find everything shipshape.
- [ Gasps ] - [ Screams ]
[M Woman On Record ] ?? Think of all that we could share??
??Let's get together every day??
??Every way and everywhere??
??And though we haven't got a lot??
?? We could be sharin' all we've got??
?? Together??
- ?? Oh, I really think you're swell?? - What if we got some ants,
- ?? We really ring the bell?? - and when she comes by the window we dump 'em down her dress?
- Impractical. - Where're you gonna find ants at night, stupid?
Ooh, the three of them. I'm so mad I could just spit.
??Let's get together Yea,yea,yea??
?? Two is twice as nice as one??
??Let's get together right away??
?? We'll be havin' twice the fun??
- ??And you can always count on me?? - Hey, I got an idea!
- ??A twosome we will be?? - Come on!
??Let's get together Yea,yea,yea????
[ Chattering ]
- How do you like camp? - Oh, it's okay, I guess.
I'm not coming back to this one, though. They're so juvenile.
They won't let you wear lipstick or perfume.
I feel absolutely naked without my lipstick.
Oh. [ Clears Throat ] Where you from?
Um, Monterey, California.
That's great.
Oh, you'd love California; at least I do.
It's so sort of-- I don't know-- marvelous, actually.
- [ Clears Throat ] Sounds great. - Mm-hmm.
Oh, it's absolute fun living in California,
Every year when I get home from camp, Dad takes me on a trek into the mountains.
- Gee, that's great. - Mm-hmm.
Your mother just lets you go up in the mountains like that?
- Oh, I don't have a mother; just Dad and me. - [M Scissors Cutting ]
He's wonderful. Besides, I know almost everything about trails...
and camping and woodlore.
We have a ball, just Daddy and me and Hecky.
- Ooh, it's hot out here. - Who's Hecky?
Our ranch foreman. He tells sensational stories.
He used to be a rodeo rider actually.
- ????[M Starts ] - Oh, they've started the music again.
- I guess we oughta, huh? - Mm-hmm.
I love dancing. I could just dance all night,
- especially with you, Wilfred. - [ Clears Throat ]
[ Chattering ]
[ Gasps ]
[ People Laughing ]
Your dress is ruined! Where were you? Where could she have done it?
- Oh, I don't know! I wasn't anywhere. I just went out-- - [ Chuckling ]
Serves ya right. Stay out of our tent from now on.
- You vicious, little wretch! - [ Gasps ]
- Stop it! Stop it! - Let her go!
Sharon, let go of her! Get away!
- [ Girls Screaming ] - Stop that!
Stop that, ladies, please! Girls--
Stop it! Girls! Stop!
Stop. Stop. Misses, stop.
- [M Girls Screaming ] - [ Gasps ]
[ Stammering ]
[ Shouts ]
I've got a cake in my hands! Now stop it, children!
[ Screams, Groans ]
You little wretches!
[M Girls Continue Screaming ]
Congratulations.
In the history of our camp, that was the most infamous,
the most revolting, the most disgusting display of hooliganism...
we have ever had.
- Brawling like hooligans in front of our guests. - And worst of all,
two sisters who should be setting a good example,
We're not sisters!
I've never seen her before in my life!
They are, aren't they?
No, ma'am, just look-alikes.
An amazing resemblance.
I gather that you two girls don't get along together?
Hmm. Well, have you ever heard of Gilbert and Sullivan?
Yes, ma'am.
They were composers.
They wrote a memorable song called...
''Let the Punishment Fit the Crime.''
[ Girls Chattering ]
Sharon McKendrick, we are waiting.
All right, girls, follow me.
?? [ Girls Whistling ''Bridge On The River Kwai'' ]
? ? ??
Now, girls, that's enough of this nonsense!
Go back to your activities!
- [ Girls Shouting ] - All right, young ladies.
In here.
Yes.
All right.
Four weeks left at camp and you'll spend them all together;
room together, eat together, play together.
Either you'll find a way to live with each other...
or you'll punish yourselves far better than I ever could.
Good-bye, girls.
[ Girls Chattering, Laughing ]
It drives her crazy. I completely ignore her.
- Give it to her good. - The old coventry treatment.
Pretty soon the silence will drive her absolutely out of her mind.
[ Girls Giggling ]
[M Thunderclap ]
[M Wind Gusting ]
- Oh! Oh, my gosh! - Oh, my goodness! Hurry, quick!
I've got it. Hook it. Tie that down over there, tight.
- Thanks. - You're welcome.
Oh, gosh! Look at this mess!
- Are any of them spoiled? - Well, it didn't do 'em any good.
Oh, dirty darn, look at this one.Just ruined.
Oh, that's a shame. Who is he?
Are you kidding? Ricky Nelson?
Oh. Your boyfriend.
[ Gags ] I wish he was!
You mean you never heard of him?
Where do you come from, outer space?
No. I'm from Boston.
[ Snootily ] Oh... Boston.
- Where's your home? - California.
Oh, I've seen movies of California. Is it a nice place to live?
Sensational! We got a ranch out in Carmel.
I got a picture. You wanna see it?
There. That's the house. Then the stables go off down there.
- How lovely. - Oh, I got my own horse and everything.
We got a lake. You know, you could practically fall right out of the front door...
and go swimming anytime you want.
Who's this?
That's my dad. Isn't he dreamy?
[M Sharon ] He's very handsome,
- Is it cold in here? - I'm hot.
Want a Fig Newton?
What's your pop like? I mean, is he a friend you could talk to...
or one of those busy types?
Well, I don't have a father actually.
Mummy and Daddy separated years ago. She never mentions him now.
You know, it's scary the way nobody stays together anymore these days.
Pretty soon there's gonna be more divorces than marriages.
Isn't it the truth?
- How old are you? - Thirteen.
So am I. I can't wait till I'm 1 8...
and get my own car and stay out dancing till midnight.
I'll be 1 4 November 1 2.
No kiddin'? That's my birthday too.
Isn't that peculiar? November 1 2?
Mm-hmm. Funny, isn't it?
Uh-oh, this one's full.
Hey, what do ya know, it's stopped raining.
[M Birds Twittering ]
What is your mother like?
- I can't remember her. - Did she die?
Nope. Busted up with Dad when I was young.
But she was fabulous. Absolutely fabulous!
- How do you know? - There used to be a picture of her on Daddy's desk.
But once he caught me looking at it, and it's never been around since,
Hey, you wanna come to the commissary and get a popsicle with me?
Can you only think about your stomach at a time like this?
At a time like what?
Don't you feel it? Don't you know what's happening?
Don't you find it peculiar that we both look so much alike and have the same birthday?
It's just one of those things, isn't it?
Will you come inside a minute... please?
Mother always says I'm psychic;
you know, that I can sense things when something odd is going to happen.
I always get goose bumps. Look.
So what?
I don't understand.
What are you doing with her picture?
It's my mother.
But it's my mother too.
????[M Reveille ]
[M Girls Chattering ]
Uh... lunch.
You go.
I'm not hungry.
I hope we have chicken tonight because I really like that,
[ Crying ]
[ Gasps ]
I didn't know what to say.
I know. I didn't either.
Golly, sisters!
You know what probably happened.
They must've quarrelled and parted...
and just sort of... bisected us, each taking one of us.
Why do you suppose they separated?
I don't know. I can't imagine anyone not loving Mother. She's absolutely divine!
Well, what about Dad? He's a sensational person, I mean, as a friend and all.
The thing is... that neither of them got married again.
You see what that means?
- Not really. - Secretly, in their innermost hearts,
they must still be in love with each other.
Then why have they stayed separated all these years?
Because that's how true love creates its beautiful agony.
All splendid lovers have just dreadful times.
Uh... Peleus and Melisande, Daphnis and Chloe.
History's just jammed with stories of lovers parted by some silly thing.
Uh-oh!
Oh!
Oh, my goodness!
Oh, boy! Oh, my gosh! Oh!
- What's the matter? - Uh--
You wanna meet Father and I'm just dying to know Mother.
Well, what if--
Oh, my gosh! It just seems so scary that we might be able to pull it off.
Pull what off?
- Switch places! - Switch?
We could do it. We're twins, aren't we?
Oh, I want to know Mother. Look, now I'm getting goose bumps.
Me too.
You know something, there's more to it than just switching places.
- I believe fate brought us together. - How so?
If we switched, sooner or later they'd have to unswitch us.
Mother would have to bring me to California to unmiX us.
- And they'd have to meet again. - Face to face.
- Are you thinking what I'm thinking? - EXactly.
Let's get to work!
- Hmm? - It's amazing!
Now, I think you should wear this one when you go to meet Dad.
Oh, this is gorgeous! Oh, I'm going to wear this one when I go to Boston.
Oh, I adore it!
Now, Susan, will you pay attention.
Now the music room and the library are on the first floor.
Now your room is the second door on the second floor on the left, all right?
Now, the horse's name is Schotzli and the dog is Andromeda.
Verbena collects the dirty laundry every Monday.
- [M Girls Chattering ] - Sharon, will you pay attention.
Now, eXcept for the dirty socks; those are Thursday.
Oh, yeah. My favorite food is chili beans.
Oh, and you gotta chew gum 'cause I always chews gum.
Um, flat ''A's'', you must remember all your ''A's'' are flat.
Uh, talk fast, you know, 'cause everybody talks fast. And--
But I never bite my nails!
Sharon, ya gotta! I always chew mine. Anyhow, Dad'll know.
Go on, bite 'em,
Can't. Shan't. Aunt. Hmm?
No, no. ''Ca-un't.'' ''Sha-un't.'' ''Au-unt.''
''Ca-un't.'' ''Sha-un't.'' ''Au-unt.''
- Ooh, I can't wait till camp is over. - ''Ca-un't'' wait.
Okay, I ''ca-un't'' wait.
[ Girls Saying Good-bye ]
- Daddy, he doesn't smell at all! - You're not gonna take it home, and that's it!
- Oh, Daddy, you're so mean! He's so cute. - She's not gonna take it home.
Ah, you big meany. I spent so much time to get him.
Ahh, baby.
[ Chattering ]
It's got to be done methodically.
Remember the key: recollection and memory.
- Get her talking about how her and Daddy first met. - And their first date.
- Find out about that first date. - [M Miss Inch ] Sharon!
- That's you now. - Oh, yes, coming.
Now, look, the most important thing: you must bring Mother to California.
Boston is no place to rekindle a romance.
[M Miss Inch ] Sharon McKendrick!
Good-bye, girls. Good-bye. Sharon McKendrick.
Your chauffeur's waiting for you, dear, Now hurry,
The punishment was harsh, I know, putting you two girls together,
but you've survived it, and I hope you've both learned something from the eXperience.
- Oh, boy, you'd be surprised, Miss Inch. - [ Chuckles ]
Yes. Well, good-bye, Sharon. See you neXt summer.
Good-bye, Miss Inch. Oh, uh...
I ''ca-un't'' tell you how very much I've enjoyed my stay.
I ''sha-un't'' tell my ''au-unt'' about the ''au-unts''-- uh, ants,
nor the debutantes, shall I?
[ Chuckles ] Bye.
- What did you do to your hair? - Oh, I cut it. It was too hot long.
- You wait till your grandmother sees what you've done. - Hmph.
[M Car Door Closes ]
Miss Lockness, Betina, upstairs, third door to the left.
Oh, what's her name? Miss--
[M Car Door Closes ]
[ Sighs ] Oh, well here goes nothin'.
What?
[M Woman ] For the white wine-- and with the meat,
Do we have any more of-- [M Muttering ]
I think we better have cloakroom tickets for the ladies' wraps as well,
Oh, Rosa, I want all the gilt chairs in the music room, and do see that they're well dusted.
- [M Maid ] Mrs, McKendrick, you asked me to remind you-- - Oh,yes,yes,yes,
Do see that the maids keep absolutely quiet during the music,
If they must empty the ash trays, tell them to do it without clinking.
- I'll see to it. - I want those Steinways at the north end of the music room,
- Have you checked about delivery? - I'll see about it right now.
- Now, I'll tell you what. - Well, you're home from camp, are you?
- Hello, Miss Lockness. - Did you bring home all your underwear and personal things?
- Yes, it's in my luggage. Staimes has it. - It's probably full of germs.
- What have you done to your hair? - Do you like it?
Wait till your grandmother sees what you've done.
Who is that I hear out there?
Is that my little girl?
The tall, gangly thing?
- Hi, Grandfather. - Hello, sweetheart.
Oh, my, my, my.
Oh, well, well, well. Let me look at you. [ Chuckles ]
Have you had-- Well, what's the matter, dear?
- I'm just happy to see you. - Ah, and I'm happy to see you too.
I'll tell you, your grandpa missed you around here.
You know, it was an awful-- [ Stammering ] Wait a minute.
- Wait, wait. What are you doing? - Making a memory.
- Making a memory? - Mm-hmm.
All my life, years from now when I'm quite grown up,
I'll remember my grandfather and how he always smelled of--
[ Sniffing ] tobacco and peppermint.
Smelled of tobacco and pepper-- [ Chuckling ]
Well, I'll tell you what. I use the peppermint for my indigestion,
and the tobacco-- [ Clears Throat ] to make your grandmother mad.
[ Laughing ]
Sharon! Sharon!
Welcome home, darling,
- Mother! - Oh, darling. It's so good to have you home.
Let me take a look at--
What on earth have you done to your hair?
- I cut it. - Well, that's certainly obvious.
I thought there was something different.
Well, what's done is done. At least it'll grow again.
What's the matter, Sharon?
Are those tears I see?
I can't help it, Mother.
- If only you knew. - Knew what?
Why, Sharon. When did you get back?
- Hi, Granny. - She just arrived. Doesn't she look wonderful?
Ye-- My dear child, what have you done to your hair?
- She cut it. - Well, I had to because--
If my opinion means anything in this house, which I doubt, I like it short the way it is.
- Charles, stop burbling. - I haven't burbled in years and--
Go down to your office and read your newspaper.
See you at dinner.
- Bye. - Oh, now really, Mother, it doesn't look so bad.
It's hoydenish. Are you a boy or a girl? Make up your mind.
- What's that? - Oh, it's a present I brought for you.
We made it-- I mean, I made it, especially for you.
Thank you, dear. What is it?
It's a bird cage made out of popsicle sticks.
- Oh, come on upstairs with me while I finish getting dressed. - See you later.
[ Chuckles ]
- Did you make some nice friends at camp? - Oh, yes, one girl in particular.
- Who is she? - Oh,just a girl.
- From Boston? - No,just a girl from someplace.
My goodness, you're beautiful.
[ EXhales ] Well, what's the matter?
You're staring at me as if you'd never seen me before.
Oh, I don't know.
I'm just happy you're here and that you're you.
Well, I'm happy that you're here and you're you.
Now, be a good girl, fasten me up.
- Did you miss me? - Mm-hmm. Did you miss me?
[ Chuckles ] You'll never know.
I'll see you at the Somerset Club after my garden club meeting. Stand up, child.
Don't slouch. I hope you haven't picked up bad habits at that camp of yours.
- Keep your shoulders straight. See you at the Somerset, Margaret. - Yes, Mother.
Now-- Well, what's the frown for?
I just got back and you've got all those meetings and things.
Well, I thought we could spend the day together and talk.
Oh, we have the whole weekend to talk. And you know that I cannot cancel the Red Cross.
[ Sighs ]
Well, what I have to say can wait.
Yes, dear?
I just wanted to have a little woman-to-woman talk with you about Stafford.
Stafford? Who's Stafford?
Oh, this boy I met at camp. I just wanted your advice on something.
Yes? On what?
Well, uh...
I wanted you to tell me how long you waited before you got married.
Sharon.
- Oh, Lockness. - Yes, Miss Margaret?
Please tell my mother that I won't be able to meet her, and cancel all of my appointments.
- Cancel them? - Yes. Something very important has come up.
Yes, Miss Margaret.
Sharon, what I'm trying to say is that the decision to marry...
is something best considered after you've lived a little bit longer.
Mother, you're perfectly right. Stafford was much too juvenile for me.
Well, thank goodness for that.
- To be perfectly frank with you, the old zing just wasn't there. - Zing?
You know, the charge that shoots up your spine when you meet the one man you wanna marry.
Like when you met Daddy.
[ Sighs ] What was Daddy like?
Well... I don't know how we got around to him.
Is it terribly painful for you to talk about Daddy?
No. Why should it be?
I don't know.
Well, I thought, maybe when you've been in love with somebody once,
well, the recollection and memory might be bitter-- bitterly painful.
Oh, Sharon, that was many, many years ago. Don't dramatize it.
Where did he take you on your very first date?
He-- He took me to dinner.
It was an Italian restaurant. One of those down in those old basements in New York.
It was called Mar-- Martinelli's.
- Martinelli's? - Yes,
Hmm.
- You said there was music. - Uh-huh.
- What song did they play? - Song?
Oh, there must've been a song. You know, the old ''They're playing our song'' type of thing.
Oh. Well, if there was, I wouldn't remember it.
- It was much too long ago. - Oh.
??La-di-dom Ba-dee??
? La-di-dom La-di ?
? La-di La-di-dom ?
? La-da ?
? Though time may tatter?
? Our first sweet thrill ?
??It doesn't matter??
? It never will ?
? La-di-dom La-di ?
??La-di-dom Ba-dom??
? La-di La-di-dom ?
? La-da ??
[M People Chattering ]
Susie,
- Hi, peanut. - Hi, Dad.
- Well, how was the camp? - Fine.
- No broken bones or anything? - Mm-mm.
No. Come on, let's get the bags, honey.
- Here's my baggage check. - Oh, boy, are you still biting your nails?
Oh, you noticed. She told me that you--
- [ Chuckles ] - What?
Nothing.
Well, I certainly did enjoy all those nice long, newsy letters, yes, sir.
Oh, that. Well, we meant to write,
but we just got so tied up with-- with plans and things, you know, well we--
- Who's ''we''? - Uh, uh.
Us. I mean, I.
Oh, us, There was a very nice girl there,
We became quite good friends.
Oh, that's mine. That's my... bag.
Mm-hmm.
Glad to be home, huh?
It's wonderful. Were you lonely while I was gone?
- I cried myself to sleep every night about the first week-- - No, no, seriously.
Well, seriously, I got to play golf every day. I played poker at night.
I wish I could find one of these camps where they keep you all winter.
- Ho-ho. - Ho-ho.
It's good to have you home, goofy.
Uh, Susie, there's, uh... been a lot of things happening since you left.
And I think we ought to have a little quiet talk sometime.
- Oh, sure. I have some things I wanna talk over with you too. - Oh, you have, huh?
- Mm-hmm, but not now. - Okay.
Now I just wanna think about getting home and being with my father.
My very ''o-own fa-ather''.
''O-own fa-ather''?
- [ Chuckles ] Father. - Father.
[ Horn Honking ]
Oh, Daddy, it's beautiful!
Well, it's just about the same. You didn't think it was gonna change, did ya? Hecky!
- [M Man ] Ho! - Look.
Ah, shoo, shoo. What have you got there with ya, Mitch?
- Hi, Hecky. - How are you, darlin'?
What'd you have to bring this kid back for? I thought we got rid of her.
Well, she was hanging around the airport, I thought I might as well get her,
- [ Mock Chuckle ] How was camp? - Oh, swell.
For heaven sakes, it's about time. We've been waitin' for you all day!
- Hi, Verbena. - Never mind that ''hi''talk, You just give me a hug,
Oh. Hello, honey. Let me get a look at you.
Ya-- Ya know, there-- there's a change in you.
Just the same as I always was.
No. No, you're not. I--
- [ Growling ] - Not quite sure what it is,
- Hi, Andromeda. - [ Barking ]
- Stop that, Andromeda! What's wrong with you? - [M Growling ]
You crazy dog. It's Susie, ya silly.
Well, it's almost as if your own dog didn't know you.
[ Chuckles ] Funny, isn't it?
Uh, dogs are funny things.
Well, I guess I'll go up to my room and put some of those--
- Come on, we'll get you unpacked while you tell me about camp, - Coming.
Tell me about all the things you did at that camp, I wanna get that laundry of yours too,
-Come down when you get through. Somebody I want you to meet. -All right.
- Be down in a minute. - [M Woman ] Hello, darling,
Mitch, I was wondering when you'd get back, I was beginning to get so bored sitting here,
Well, did you tell her anything about us?
- Good to be home again? - Sure is.
Verbena, there's a woman downstairs.
Mm-hmm. There is indeed.
Well, who is she? What is she doing here?
I'm not saying a word. I mind my own business.
EXcept if he wants to make a ninny of himself, that's his affair. I don't say a word.
- Well, how did she get here? - It's none of my never mind.
I don't say a word.
EXcept a man like your father with a grown daughter going on 1 4--
He's not what you'd call one of those... ''charm fellows''...
with a big, teethy grin and-- and a lot of artistic clever talk.
- What does a young girl like her see in him? - I don't know.
I'll give you a million reasons and he's got 'em right in the bank.
[ Sighs ] ''It was always thus.''
What was always thus?
I'm not sayin' a word.
I'm not one to talk about anybody behind their back.
But she's good. She's awful good.
Those cool blue eyes lookin' right through you. Calm, that one.
Go ridin' together, swimmin' together, out to dinner every night.
But it's none of my business, understand, That's why I'm not sayin'a word,
Not one single word. Besides, I don't think you oughta talk about people--
Hi, Susie. We were just talking about you. Uh, this is Miss Robinson.
- How do you do? - Hello, darling.
I've been looking forward to meeting you for just weeks now.
From the way your father talked, I eXpected a little girl, but you're practically a woman.
- I'm nearly 1 4. - Say, I think I'll go and make martinis. You want one?
- Oh, I'd love one. - Uh, how about you, honey? You want root beer, ginger ale?
- Could I have a ginger ale? - Sure. You get acquainted. I'll be just a minute.
- Your father tells me you were at camp, dear. Was it fun? - Yes, it was lovely. Thank you.
You know, ever since I met your father, it's been ''Susan this'' and ''Susan that.''
You're obviously very good friends, and I think that's just wonderful.
I can, uh, tell you something else too if you can keep a secret.
- From whom? - From your father.
Oh, then you better not tell me.
Daddy and I don't keep secrets from one another.
We tell each other everything.
Oh, well, no, dear. It wasn't that kind of a secret.
I just wanted to confide in you that I find him a very special, wonderful kind of person.
Well,just between us,
he's not too brilliant or clever with what he says,
you know, like the ''charm fellows'' we all adore so.
We were riding the other day. Your father let me ride Schotzli.
I understand she's your horse,
I hope you don't mind my riding her.
Oh, no.
Schotzli and I are used to strange women riding her.
- What? - Oh, you know Daddy.
He's always playing the field.
- No, I didn't know. - Oh, yes.
Every week mostly, he has some different dame up here.
One week, I'll never forget,
he had five different women up here.
- You don't say. - Of course, it's none of my business...
if he wants to make a ninny of himself with all those women.
That's why I'm not saying a word. Not one single word.
Here you are. Now, did you two get to know each other?
Yes.
We had a lovely little talk.
[ Alarm Ringing ]
- [ Ringing ] - Hello?
- [ Operator] Miss Susan Evers? - Yes, this is her.
- [ Operator] Go ahead, please. - Sue, it's Sharon. How's everything?
Ooh, Mother's the absolute living end! She's gorgeous. Just breathtaking!
- I got to talk to you about their first date. - Susan--
-Italian dinner, drippy candles, checkered tablecloth-- -Susan, will you listen?
Ooh, I got their song. It goes like this. ? For now, for always ?
- Susan, I've got something to tell you. - ? La-la, la-la, la-- ??
- Susan! - What?
We're in trouble. You'll have to bring Mother out immediately.
No! Holy smokes, I just had one day with her. I hardly got to know her at all.
- Susan, it's an emergency. There's a woman out here. - Huh?
Her name's Vicky, and she's beautiful.
Oh, is that all? Don't be silly. Dad'd never get serious.
But he's serious about this one. He's trying to get Vicky and me to be friends. She's dangerous.
Well, bust it up, for heaven sakes!
Follow him wherever he goes and submarine her!
-You've got to tell Mother and come out here to help! -I want some more time with her.
- You've had her for 1 3 years, and I just got here! - Susan!
I won't! Do the best you can and stay on Daddy's tail. That's all!
- Susan, please. - I won't give up Mother this soon and that's final!
- Good-bye. - Susan.
[ Sighs ]
I'm glad you could come along today, honey, because there's something I wanna talk about.
- It's kind of important. - Oh, what is it?
- Well, you know the girl you met at the house, Vicky? - Mm-hmm.
Well, I thought that we ought to be alone a little while so we could talk.
- Well, I wanted to talk to you about something too, Dad. - Oh? Okay, go ahead.
All those weeks at camp, I've been wondering about my mother.
You what? What do you wanna start wondering about something like that for?
Well, it's a perfectly natural thing for a girl to do. Where is she?
Well, I don't know where she is. How should I know?
- Last thing I heard, she went to Spain and married some drunk. - Daddy, that's not true. Stop.
All right. I lost track. You wouldn't like her anyway, hon.
She's-- These big staring eyes and red frizzy hair.
And besides, she was fat, really fat.
Then why did you fall in love with her?
Well, you know, you lose your head sometimes.
Besides that-- Wait just a minute.
Hey, Fletcher, play on through. I'll pick you up at the bar.
Well, sit down.
[ Clears Throat ] Honey, you don't wanna start thinkin' about your mother all of a sudden.
There's a-- Well, there's no need for that.
You can always come and talk to me about anything. You always have.
Well, it's not the same. Well, father and daughter is okay.
But when a girl gets to a certain age,
that's when she really misses her mother.
Why? I mean, uh--
Oh, you mean the talk about... certain things?
- Yeah. - That?
[ Inhales ] I guess we never have just sat down and talked about that, have we?
Well, this is kind of an odd place, but I guess it's as good as any.
Um-- Well, we might as well get it over with. Uh--
- How-- How much do you know now already? - About what?
- About what you were just talking about? - Nothing. Absolutely nothing!
- Nothing? - Well, you never brought up the subject and I wondered why.
[ Inhales, EXhales ]
Well, honey, um--
All right, we oughta get straight on one thing first; that's little boys.
How-- See, I know how they are because...
- being a man I used to be a little boy once, so I know. - I don't know what--
Take my word for it because I used to be a little boy one time and I know! I know about it.
Oh. [ Chuckles ] Daddy.
- You're too funny for words. - What do you mean, ''funny''?
Well, I've known about all that for simply years.
Well, what the heck were we just talking about then?
Well, what were you talking about?
Well, uh--
[ Sighs ] I think I better go and putt out.
There's the little beast now.
Why, she's nothing but a child.
She's a conniving, vicious, little two-faced brat.
Just smile, pet.
Think of California and that wonderful community property law...
and just smile,
- Hi. - Hello, Mitch, darling.
- Hi, Edna. - Who is this ecstatic, bright-eyed child?
- Oh, Mitch, this couldn't be-- - Sure, that's Susie.
- Honey, this is Vicky's mother, Mrs. Robinson. - How do you do?
- This angelic girl? This is the one you call ''peanut face''? - Oh, Daddy, really.
Now, you come right over here to your Auntie Edna...
and you and I are gonna get to know one another. [ Giggles ]
Come on, I wanna hear all about ya. Down ya go.
- Hi. - Did you tell her?
- [M Edna Chattering Nonstop ] - Well, I started to, and I don't know what happened.
- Oh, Mitch, for-- - All right,just let me do it in my own way. All right?
Now, it's all settled,
Susan and I have decided we're all gonna have a darling lunch right here.
Edna, I'm sorry. I don't think we can today. I promised to spend the whole day with Susie.
- We've got some stuff planned, you know? - Ahh.
- I'm terribly sorry. - Oh, that's all right. Another time, dear.
[ Chuckles ] You're an adorable thing!
Come on, Susie, We'll get the horses, We're gonna take a ride down the beach,
- Have fun. - Bye, darling.
First change I make in that household, off she goes to a boarding school in Switzerland.
Honey, listen, uh... I've been meaning to ask you, what do you think of Vicky?
Uh... in what respect?
Well, uh,,, it's just an ordinary question,
No, it's not. You ask me what I think of Vicky.
Well, what do I think of Vicky as what?
I mean, if you ask me what did I think of her as a fashion model...
or a famous aviatrix or something,
then maybe I'd express some sort of opinion, but just to ask--
[ Clears Throat ] All right. Uh...
what do you think of Vicky as a person?
[ Chuckles ] Well, Daddy, I really couldn't say.
She's a perfect stranger to me.
- Beat you back to the house! - Hey, wait a minute, Susie. Susie!
Hey, I'm not through talkin' to you!
[M Car Horn Honks ]
Hi, darling.
- Hi. - Hello, sweetie.
[ Sighs ]
He can't. He just can't.
Oh, it just makes me so mad,
A man of his age!
All the work and the plans!
Hi.
You used to confide in me.
Anything you wanna talk over with me?
No.
You wouldn't like to tell me why Andromeda never comes near ya?
[ Chuckles ]
Or why suddenly your appetite's changed?
[ Chuckles ] Dear Verbena, you are a mystic.
Mystic? I'm no mystic.
Well, asking me all these crazy questions.
Gee, I don't know what you're getting at.
You know what I'm talking about. There--
There's something very strange about you.
Are you sure there isn't anything you wanna tell me?
What do you want me to tell you?
Well, I don't know. It's... almost as if you were--
No, that's impossible.
Almost as if I were who, Verbena?
Oh, forget it, honey. Never mind.
You mean Sharon?
Where did you hear about her?
Oh, Verbena.
I've got to tell someone. But you gotta swear never to tell Daddy.
Promise?
Now, darling, try to be diplomatic.
- Honey, I know how to talk to my own daughter. - Calmly.
- She's 1 4 years old. She's not eXactly insensitive. - Good luck.
Susan!
Oh, hi, Dad.
-Just getting back? - Uh-huh. Now,just a minute. I wanna talk to you.
- You didn't know what a good thing you had when you had it. - Huh?
Susie!
- ?? [ Piano ] - Now, why'd you go running off like that?
- I told you I wanted to talk to you about something. - I'm listening.
- Get comfortable. - [ Clears Throat ] I am comfortable.
What do you want?
Well, first of all, honey, about me.
Now, oh, you probably think of me as being just your father.
And to you, I probably seem ancient and old.
[ Laughs ] Not ancient, Daddy.
Well, certainly not. I'm in my best years.
- ?? [ Stops ] - Okay, don't get nervous.
Well, I'm not nervous.
- ?? [ Resumes ] - Honey, what seems old to you now isn't old when you get old.
若你父母感情淡, 就當他們孩子看
萬一家庭大樹斷
想複合 怎麼辦 先得你找金鋼鑽
什麼是 金剛鑽
巧計能將爸媽賺
若你父母兩心散 卻又不願回心轉
那麼你就有題算
若你父母互不讓 你就有事準備幹
什麼事 準備幹 巧計能將爸媽賺
略施小計 再現浪漫
重溫戀愛時光
來點月光 來點音響
- 約翰! - 瑪西婭!
你把爸媽賺
循循誘導 可別莽撞
爸媽太老 不能強綁
讓他倆 共患難 共患難
巧計能將爸媽賺
約翰,他們正在放我們的歌
瑪西婭,我們之前多傻呀
讓他倆 共患難
共患難
讓他倆 共患難
共患難!
巧計能將爸媽賺!
好了，姑娘們！A到K字母開頭的這邊來
你是A到K的嗎? 不,親愛的,你是R. 去P到S的那邊去. 我們該沒有X,Y,Z開頭的吧?
這是你的抗過敏藥. 每天三次.
還有你的花露水 和你的詩集.
- 謝謝你,史丹斯. - 暑假愉快,小姐.
- 名字? - 麥肯德里克,莎倫.
- 貝爾格雷夫廣場18號,波士頓? - 是的.
我外婆說我的棚屋 應該通風良好.
別擔心. 你? 通風的.
下一個.
地上不准有糖紙. 永遠保持整潔.
廁所在那邊. 食堂在山上.
麥肯德里克, 你住在阿拉珀霍. 跟我來. 姑娘們,在這等著.
進來, 麥肯德里克. 新人到了,姑娘們. 她叫麥肯德里克.
- 嗨. - 這些姑娘? 指點你.
你在這肯定? 快樂的. 午餐後見.
- 我叫貝特西. 這是耳舒拉. - 你好. 我是莎倫.
你住了個好地方. 貝特西媽媽周周寄糖塊來.
- 我不能吃糖. - 為什麼?
我外婆認為對牙齒不好.
嗨,瑪麗.
快點,我餓壞了.
- 好大的膽子! 長著你的臉來這招搖. - 你? 怎麼做?
- 做? 我又能做什麼, 傻妞? - 我? 咬掉她的鼻子!
- 她是誰? - 我以前從沒見過她.
此時此刻,我想對所有新人 表示熱烈歡迎.
新人們,歡迎來到英奇營.
在這裏我是你們的最高指揮官 我叫...
英奇小姐.
對,英奇小姐.
我很樂意在此介紹 一位來自鄰近山頂的參觀者,
雷砧男孩營的訪客.
伊格伍德長官.
謝謝你, 英奇小姐, 大家好.
看起來像一支 女童子軍勁旅.
我為什麼在這兒? 好,這是我們的小小驚喜.
士兵斯坦福,注意! 起立,小夥子.
多美的夢!
給你們的小小驚喜,年輕女士們. 星期六晚上我們來跳舞.
安靜,姑娘們.
我們邀請了雷砧男孩營過來跳舞.
我們接受了你們的邀請.
警告一句. 注意你們的缺點.
邋遢姑娘不准跳舞,
所以保持住處清潔, 制服嶄新,
我們就? 是一個快樂的大家庭!
哦,不.
你在盯著什麼?
對不起,但你沒注意到嗎? 我們在盯著彼此.
把頭轉過去,讓我看看你的側面.
好像啊! 她和某人簡直一模一樣,你知道是誰.
- 誰? - 弗蘭肯斯坦(科學怪物)!
不歡迎你們!
那些怪物! 他們套住了我們!
- 早上好,英奇小姐. - 早上好,甘耐克小姐.
- 你想從哪里開始? - 為什麼不從阿拉珀霍棚屋開始呢?
我保證你? 發現它井井有條.
想想我們能共用全部
讓我們時時相聚
無論何時 無論何處
雖然我們並不富裕
我們能共用我們的全部
同度...
我們找些螞蟻 扔進她衣服裏如何?
- 不切實際. - 你在晚上怎麼找螞蟻?
瞧她們三個. 我氣得都要吐了.
讓我們相聚,耶,耶,耶 兩人相聚 兩倍益處
讓我們馬上相聚
我們將有兩倍歡愉 你永遠能依靠我...
我有個主意. 快來.
讓我們相聚,耶,耶,耶
- 你喜歡野營嗎? - 我猜是的.
我不? 回這個營地了. 他們不准塗口紅灑香水.
不塗口紅讓我覺得沒穿衣服.
- 你來自哪里? - 加州蒙特雷.
- 棒極了. - 你? 喜歡加州的,我喜歡.
- 說實在的,可以說是妙極了. - 聽起來很棒.
住在加州絕對其樂無窮.
我從營地回家後, 爸爸? 帶我去山裏遠足.
哇,太棒了. 你媽媽讓你去嗎?
我沒有媽媽. 家裏只有我和爸爸. 他可好了.
而且,我幾乎知道每件 關於野營和樹林的知識.
我們還? 行舞? - 只有爸爸,我和海克參加.
- 這外面好熱. - 海克是誰?
我們的牧場工頭. 他? 講精彩的故事. 他過去是牛圈騎手.
- 他們又放音樂了. - 我猜我們該跳舞了?
我喜歡跳舞. 我可以跳一整夜 - 特別是跟你跳, 威爾弗雷德.
- 她能在哪兒搞的鬼? - 我不知道! 我剛剛出去...
從現在開始離我們的棚屋遠點.
你這個惡毒的小壞蛋!
住手! 莎倫, 放開!
住手!
我救下了一個蛋? ! 住手.
你們這兩個小壞蛋!
恭喜.
在我們營地史上, 出了件最臭名昭著,
最令人噁心,最令人作嘔的 流氓行為大丟醜.
在我們的來賓面前爭吵.
最糟? 的是, 姐妹倆 都不帶個好樣.
- 我們不是姐妹. - 我以前從沒見過她.
- 她們是姐妹, 不是嗎? - 不，夫人，只是長得像.
驚人的貌似.
我推測你們兩位姑娘 一山不容二虎.
你們曾聽說過 吉伯特和蘇利文嗎?
聽說過，夫人.
他們是作曲家.
他們寫了一首難忘的歌 叫作"罪有應得".
罪有應得.
莎倫 麥肯德里克, 我們等著呢.
姑娘們，跟我來.
姑娘們，少無聊了! 回去忙你們的!
很好, 年輕女士們.
這裏面.
對...
對.
剩下來的? 星期 你們得一起共度了.
一起睡, 一起吃, 一起玩.
你們? 找出彼此相處之道的,
要不你們就自作自受 比我動手懲治更妙. 再見，姑娘們.
這? 逼瘋她的. 我完全不理她.
- 好! - 考文垂療法.
沉默? 逼她發狂.
- 我的天哪! 快! 快! - 我抓到了!
把它拉下來. 綁緊.
- 謝謝. - 別客氣.
唉! 看這亂的!
- 有沒有相片被弄壞了? - 颳風可對它們沒好處.
見鬼! 看這張. 毀了.
真可惜. 他是誰?
你在開玩笑? 瑞克 尼爾森.
你的男朋友?
我巴不得呢! 你意思是你從沒聽說過他?
你從哪里來的? 外太空嗎?
不. 我來自波士頓.
哦... 波士頓.
- 你家在哪里? - 加州.
我看過加州產的電影. 它好嗎?
妙極了. 我家在卡梅爾有個牧場.
我有張照片. 你想看嗎?
這是房子. 馬廄在那邊沒拍到.
- 真可愛. - 我有自己的馬.
我們有個湖. 你可以在任何時候 從前門跳下去游泳.
- 這是誰? - 我爸爸. 他是不是妙極了?
他非常英俊. 住這兒冷不冷?
我好熱. 想吃塊點心嗎?
你爸爸像什麼? 像朋友 還是像大忙人?
說實話,我沒有爸爸.
媽媽和爸爸分開了. 她現在從不提起他.
這樣下去真恐怖 現在沒人長相廝守了.
- 以後離婚的比結婚的多! - 不就是嗎?
- 你多大了? - 13.
我也是. 我都等不及長到18歲了.
到時候我要有自己的車 還要跳舞跳到半夜.
- 我11月12號就14歲了. - 沒開玩笑吧? 那天也是我的生日.
難道不奇怪嗎? 都是11月12號?
嗯. 真有趣, 不是嗎?
哦. 接滿了.
嗨, 雨停了!
- 你媽媽像什麼? - 我記不起來.
- 她死了嗎? - 不是.
她和爸爸吵架離婚了. 但她人很好，絕對很好.
- 你怎麼知道? - 爸爸桌上有張照片.
但爸爸抓住我偷看,現在照片不見了.
你想和我去吃根冰棍嗎?
這時候了你怎麼還能想那事?
這是什麼時候啊?
你感覺不到嗎? 你不知道即將發生什麼嗎?
你沒有發覺這很奇怪嗎? 我們這麼相像,我們正好同一天過生日?
這只是冥冥天註定吧,不是嗎?
你能進來一? 嗎,求你?
媽媽說我有特異功能, 奇事即將發生時我能感覺到.
我總是起風團. 看.
那又怎麼樣?
我不明白.
你怎麼變出她的照片的?
她是我媽媽.
但她也是我媽媽.
吃午飯去.
你去吧,我不餓.
- 我不知道該說什麼. - 我明白. 我也不知道.
啊! 姐妹!
你知道可能發生過什麼嗎?
他們一定吵架了分開了,
然後可以說就"平分"了我們- 每人養一個.
- 為什麼你猜他們分開了? - 我不知道.
我不能想像有人不再愛媽媽. 她是仙女下凡.
那爸爸呢? 他妙極了, 無論作為朋友還是其他方面.
事實是他們誰也沒有再婚.
- 你明白這意味著什麼嗎? - 不太明白.
在他們的內心最深處, 他們一定還愛著彼此.
那麼為什麼他們一直分開?
那就是真愛造成的美麗痛苦.
所有好戀人都有過痛苦時光.
佩利亞斯和梅麗桑德, 達佛涅斯和克洛伊?
歷史充滿了戀人們被一些傻事分開的故事.
- 哦,我的天! 哦,夥計! 哦,糟了! - 出什麼事了?
你想見爸爸 我想知道媽媽.
嗯, 假如...? 怎樣?
太嚇人了, 但我們應該可以辦得到.
辦得到什麼?
- 互換身份. - 互換?
我們做得到,我們是雙胞胎. 我想知道媽媽.
看! 我正在起風團.
我也是.
這不僅僅是互換身份.
- 我相信命運? 讓我們團聚. - 為什麼?
如果我們互換了, 他們不得不把我們換回來.
媽媽? 帶我去加州.
- 他們不得不重逢. - 面對面.
- 你和我心心相通? - 一點不錯.
讓我們開始吧.
真驚人.
你應該穿這件見爸爸.
好漂亮! 我要穿這件去波士頓. 我好喜歡它!
蘇珊, 專心. 音樂房和圖書室在一樓.
你的臥室在二樓左邊第二個門.
馬叫斯柯茲利 狗叫安多米達.
沃貝娜星期一收集髒衣服... 莎倫, 專心!
但髒襪子在星期三洗.
我最喜歡吃的東西是辣豆, 你要嚼口香糖,因為我嚼.
平著寫A字. 記住,你所有的A字都要平寫. 語速要快，因為那兒人人說話快.
但我從不啃指甲!
莎倫, 你要啃. 我總是啃. 無論如何, 爸爸? 知道.
來吧,啃!
不能. 不? . 姨媽. 對嗎?
不對. 咋能. 咋? . 媽姨.
咋能. 咋? . 媽姨. 哦,我都不能等到野營結束.
- 咋能等. - 對,我咋能等.
- 但是, 爸爸... - 你不能帶它回家!
哦,爸爸,你這個大刻薄鬼! 我花了這麼久來努力抓住它.
要有條不紊. 回想和記憶.
- 與她談談他們怎麼相識的. - 弄清楚他們的第一次約? .
- 莎倫! - 叫你呢.
來了!
你必須帶媽媽來加州. 波士頓不是重溫浪漫的地方.
莎倫 麥肯德里克!
再見, 姑娘們. 莎倫 麥肯德里克! 你的司機等著呢, 親愛的. 快點.
懲罰是很嚴酷, 我知道, 但你熬過來了
我希望你們都學到了點東西.
- 你? 吃驚的, 英奇小姐. - 再見, 莎倫. 下個暑假見.
再見, 英奇小姐...我咋能告訴您我玩的有多開心.
我咋? 告訴媽姨關於媽姨...螞蟻的事,
還有禮服的事, 我? 嗎? 再見.
- 你的頭髮怎麼了? - 我剪了它. 長頭髮太熱了.
等著讓你外婆看見吧.
羅克萊斯小姐, 貝蒂娜... 樓上. 左邊第三個門.
她叫什麼來著?
- 沒什麼大不了的. - 什麼?
...白葡萄酒和... 我們還有"路易聖佐治"多嗎?
我們最好為女士們的披肩準備標籤.
羅莎, 我要所有的鍍金椅子都擺在音樂室.
- 您要我提醒您... - 對, 對.
女僕們務必保持安靜. 她們必須不出聲的清空煙灰缸.
- 對... - 我想要兩架斯坦威鋼琴都擺在北邊.
- 你檢查了交付嗎? - 我現在就去看.
- 你野營回來了. - 你好,羅克萊斯小姐.
- 你的內衣都帶回家了吧? - 在我的行李箱裏.
也許滿是細菌. 你把你的頭髮怎麼了?
- 你喜歡嗎? - 等著讓你外婆看見吧.
我聽到了誰在外頭?
那不是我的小姑娘嗎? 又高又瘦的小傢伙?
- 嗨,外公. - 你好, 甜心. 哦, 我的天.
讓我看看你. 你剪了?
- 出什麼事了, 親愛的? - 我只是看到你好高興.
我看到你也好高興. 你外婆在這想死你了.
我們過得很糟? ... 等等,你在做什麼?
- 留下記憶. - 留下記憶?
許多年後的今天,當我完全長大時,
我? 永遠記住外公的味道...
- ...煙草和薄荷味. - 煙草和薄荷味!
我用薄荷治我的消化不良, 用煙草讓你的外婆發瘋.
莎倫!
歡迎回家, 寶貝.
- 媽媽! - 你回家真是太好了.
讓我看看你... 你究竟把你的頭髮怎麼了?
- 剪了. - 顯而易見.
我想有些事變了.
剪了就剪了吧. 它還? 長出來的.
怎麼了, 莎倫? 我看見眼淚了?
- 我忍不住, 媽媽. 但願你知道. - 知道什麼?
- 莎倫! 你什麼時候回來的? - 她剛到. 她看上去好極了.
你把你的頭髮怎麼了?
- 她剪了. - 我剪了是因為...
如果我的意見有人聽的話 - 我很懷疑 - 我喜歡這頭髮.
- 查理斯, 少放屁. - 我好多年沒有放屁了.
去讀你的報紙.
- 晚餐見. - 再見.
它不算太難看.
真淘氣. 你是男孩還是女孩? 拿定主意. 那是什麼?
那是我帶給你的禮物. 我們做的... 我為你做的.
- 謝謝你. 它是什麼? - 用冰棒棍做的鳥籠.
- 來跟我上樓去. - 待? 見.
- 你交朋友了? - 一個特別的女孩.
- 她是誰? - 只是一個女孩.
- 從波士頓來的? - 不. 只是從某地來的.
天啊,你真美.
怎麼了? 你盯著我 就象以前從沒見過我一樣.
我不知道. 我只是高興, 你在這兒,你還是你.
我也高興,你在這兒,你還是你. 幫我扣緊.
- 你想我嗎? - 啊哈. 你想我嗎?
你永遠不? 知道.
瑪格麗特,別忘了紅十字? ? 議. 我? 在索美塞地鐵站見你.
站有站相, 孩子. 別無精打采. 我希望你沒染上壞毛病.
- 索美塞地鐵站見. - 好的, 媽媽.
為什麼皺眉頭?
你要開? 辦事. 我以為我們能聊一整天的.
我們整個週末都可以聊. 紅十字? 開? 我不能不去.
- 那我不得不說的事可以延後. - 是嗎, 親愛的?
我只是想有次女人之間的談話 和你聊聊史坦福.
誰是史坦福?
我在野營時遇見的男孩. 我只想聽聽你的建議.
關於什麼的建議?
嗯... 我想要你告訴我 你結婚前等了多久.
莎倫?
- 羅克萊斯? - 在, 瑪格麗特小姐.
請告訴我母親我不能和她? 合, 取消我的約定.
- 取消約定? - 對. 出了大事.
莎倫, 我極力要說的是 結婚的決定
最好留著等長大再說.
媽媽,你是對的. 史坦福對我來說太幼稚了.
謝天謝地.
直截了當吧, 我對他提不起精神.
- 精神? - 對.
脊樑骨發麻的感覺. 就象你遇見爸爸時一樣的感覺.
爸爸人怎麼樣?
好, 我不明白我們怎麼提到他了.
談論他讓你非常痛苦嗎?
不. 怎麼? 呢?
我不知道. 我想也許當愛上某人時...
回想和記憶也許? 非常痛苦.
莎倫, 那已經過去很多年了. 不要誇張了.
他第一次約你在什麼地方?
他約我共進晚餐 - 在一家義大利餐館, 地方在紐約的一處地下室裏.
- 它叫 "馬丁內利". - "馬丁內利"?
- 對. - 嗯.
你說當時放了音樂. 放的是什麼歌?
- 歌? - 一定? 放首歌的.
老歌"他們正在放我們的歌"之類的.
放了嗎, 我不記得了. 過去太久了.
雖然時間可以撕碎
我們第一次的甜蜜激動
沒關係
它永不? （被忘記）...
蘇西!
- 嗨, 花生. - 嗨, 爸爸.
- 野營怎麼樣? - 很好.
沒有骨折吧? 真沒有? 來,我們取行李去.
這是我的行李牌.
- 你還在啃指甲? - 你注意到了. 她告訴我你...
- 什麼? - 沒什麼.
我真的可喜歡你寫的 所有那些又美又長又有新聞的信了.
我們打算寫, 但種種計畫和事情 就是讓我們忙得不可開交...
- 我們是誰? - 呃... 我們. 我意思是... 我...
哦, 我們. 那有個很好的女孩. 我們成了很好的朋友.
那是我的. 那是我的. 那兒.
- 回家高興嗎? - 太好了.
- 我走了你孤單嗎? - 我哭著睡著...
不. 說正經的.
我天天打高爾夫, 晚上玩撲克. 我還想再找個冬令營.
- 噢噢! - 噢噢! 你回家真好, 傻姑娘.
你離開後發生了很多事.
我們應該找個時間談談.
- 我也想告訴你一些事. - 你有心事?
- 但不是現在. - 行.
現在我只想著回家 與爸爸相依為命.
- 我的親爹地. - 親爹地?
爸爸.
爸爸, 好美!
它又沒變過. 海克!
- 喲! - 看!
你帶什麼寶貝回來了, 米奇?
- 嗨, 海克. - 嗨呀, 寶貝.
為什麼你帶她回來? 我以為我們已經甩掉她了.
她一直在飛機場閒逛沒走.
- 野營怎麼樣? - 很充實.
是時候了. 我們都等了一整天了!
嗨, 沃貝娜.
別管"嗨"了. 給我個擁抱.
你好, 寶貝. 讓我看看你.
- 你變了. - 我還是老樣子啊.
不... 你不是. 我也說不太清楚.
嗨, 安多米達.
別那樣, 安多米達, 你這條瘋狗. 這是蘇珊, 你這個傻瓜.
差不多就象你自己的狗不認識你一樣.
有趣, 不是嗎? 狗是有趣的動物.
我想我要上樓去我的房間了...
- 來告訴我野營的事. - 來了.
全都告訴我. 還有你要洗的衣服也給我.
- 忙完了就下來. - 一? 兒就下來.
你好, 親愛的. 我很高興你回來了. 我開始感到無聊了.
你告訴她我們的事了嗎?
- 你又在家太好了. - 的確如此.
沃貝娜... 樓下有個女人.
千真萬確.
她是誰? 她在這幹什麼?
我一言不發. 我只管好自己的事.
如果他想當個傻瓜, 那是他的事.
- 她怎麼來的? - 我一言不發.
像你老爸這樣的男人 除了有個快14歲的女兒外...
又完全不是什麼談笑風生的魅力男,
- 那她怎麼看上他的? - 我不知道.
我可以給你一百萬個理由,它們都在銀行裏.
總是如此.
什麼總是如此?
我一言不發. 我不是背後說壞話的人.
她很好. 她好的要命.
那雙冷冷的藍眼珠 直勾勾的看著你.
騎馬, 游泳, 外出晚餐, 但這不關我的事,
所以我一言不發, 一言不發.
還有, 你不要跟人講...
蘇西. 說蘇西蘇西到. 這是羅賓遜小姐.
- 你好. - 我好期待見到你.
你爸爸把你說成女孩, 但你實際上是女人了.
- 我都快14歲了. - 我想來杯馬提尼.
- 我也想. - 寶貝, 你想來杯薑汁嗎?
- 薑汁. - 好的. 現在你們相互熟悉熟悉.
- 我聽說你野營回來. 野營好玩嗎? - 是的, 可好玩了, 謝謝你.
自打我遇見你爸爸, 他就蘇珊這蘇珊那的.
你們父女是這麼好的朋友真是太好了. 你能保守一個秘密嗎?
- 跟誰保守秘密? - 跟你爸爸.
那你最好別告訴我.
爸爸和我之間不保密. 我們告訴彼此每件事.
不, 親愛的. 不是那種秘密.
我只想告訴你我發現 他是個非常好的人.
好, 別說出去, 他不象 他說的那樣光輝和聰明.
你知道, 像我們都崇拜的魅力男那樣.
我和你爸爸騎過馬, 他讓我騎斯柯茲利.
我知道她是你的馬. 我希望你不介意我騎它.
不. 斯柯茲利和我 都已經習慣陌生女人騎它了.
什麼?
你知道爸爸的. 他總是用情不專.
- 不, 我不知道. - 哦, 是的.
每週他都帶來一些女人.
有一周 - 我永不? 忘記 - 他帶來了五個不同的女人.
是嗎.
這不關我的事, 如果他想當個傻瓜.
那就是為什麼我一言不發. 一言不發.
給你. 你們兩個相互熟悉了沒有?
是的. 我們閒聊得很愉快.
喂?
- 蘇珊 埃文斯? - 是的.
- 接吧. - 我是莎倫. 怎麼樣?
媽媽絕對是極品女人! 她美麗動人,美得讓人透不過氣.
我跟她聊了她的第一次約? . 義大利晚餐...
蘇珊, 聽我說!
他們的歌聽起來象這一首. 現在, 永遠...
我要告訴你一件事...
- 蘇珊! - 什麼事?
你必須現在就帶媽媽來這兒.
不! 我才跟她相處了一天. 我才剛剛認識她.
十萬火急. 這兒來了個女人,她很漂亮.
就這個? 爸爸從來不? 動真格.
對這個女人他動真格了. 他試圖讓我和她成為朋友.
好, 破壞它. 跟著他們,暗算她.
- 你要帶媽媽來這兒. - 我想要更多的時間.
你跟了她13年! 我不? 那麼久. 盡你所能跟緊爸爸.
- 蘇珊, 求你! - 我不? 這麼快放棄媽媽. 再見.
蘇珊?
我很高興你今天來. 有件事我想跟你談談.
- 什麼事? - 你知道你遇見的女孩--薇琪嗎?
我想我們應該單獨相處一? , 以便我們交流.
- 我也想說件事. - 好. 說吧.
在夏令營的時候, 我想知道我媽媽的事.
為什麼你想知道像這樣的事呢?
這對一個女孩來說很自然. 她在哪里?
我不知道. 也許她去西班牙 和某個酒鬼結婚了.
爸爸, 那不是真的.
好吧. 無論如何你不? 喜歡她.
大鼓眼, 紅捲髮, 而且她很胖,真的很胖.
那為什麼你? 愛上她?
有時候你? 暈頭轉向. 此外, 我... 等一等.
弗萊徹, 繼續玩. 我? 到酒吧找你.
坐吧
寶貝, 你不要開始想媽媽.
沒有必要. 你有什麼心事永遠可以跟我談.
這不一樣.
父女是其樂融融, 但當女孩長到了某個歲數,
她就? 想媽媽.
為什麼? 我意思是...
- 你意思是談某種事情? - 對.
那種事情?
我猜我們從沒有談過那種事情.
這種事很不尋常, 但它實際上和其他事一樣.
我們完全可以一談了之.
- 這種事你已經有多久了? - 什麼事?
- 你正在談的那種事. - 絕對沒有.
- 沒有? - 好了, 你老是不打開天窗說亮話.
好, 寶貝... 沒關係. 讓我們 首先搞明白一件事. 小男孩.
我知道他們怎樣 因為我 曾經也是小男孩, 所以我知道.
- 我不知道... - 我曾經也是小男孩, 我知道.
- 我知道它. - 爸爸, 你講話太有趣了.
- 你這是什麼意思? - 這件事我已經知道好多年了.
- 那我們正在談什麼? - 那你正在談什麼?
好, 呃...
我最好離開了.
現在有了個小討厭.
她只是個娃娃.
她是個被慣壞的,惡劣的,兩面三刀的搗蛋鬼.
笑一笑, 寶貝.
想一想加州和棒極了的 共有財產法, 笑一笑.
- 嗨. - 你好, 蜜雪兒, 親愛的.
- 嗨, 埃德娜. - 這個長著出神的明亮眼睛的孩子是誰啊?
- 她不? 是... - 當然. 她是蘇西.
- 這是薇琪的媽媽. - 你好.
- 這姑娘就是你叫她花生臉的那個? - 爸爸, 真的嗎!
過來到你阿姨埃德娜這邊來, 我們好彼此熟悉熟悉.
我想聽你的所有事. 過來坐.
- 嗨. - 你告訴她了嗎?
我開口了, 然後我不知道出了什麼事.
- 哦, 蜜雪兒... - 不要緊. 讓我用自己的辦法來做.
都安排好了. 蘇珊和我決定 我們一起在這吃頓快樂午餐.
埃德娜, 我很抱歉, 我們今天不行.
我答應整天陪著蘇西.
- 我非常抱歉. - 沒關係. 下一次, 親愛的.
- 你非常可愛! - 我們要去騎馬.
- 玩得開心. - 再見, 親愛的.
我結婚後要做的第一件事, 就是打發她去瑞士寄宿學校.
寶貝, 我打算問你... 你覺得薇琪怎麼樣?
哪方面怎麼樣?
好... 這只是隨便問問.
不, 它不是. 你問我我覺得薇琪怎麼樣.
我覺得薇琪作為什麼怎麼樣?
如果你問我我覺得她作為 時裝模特或著名女飛行員怎麼樣,
那我也許能發表意見, 但如果你碰巧問我...
好吧. 你覺得薇琪作為人怎麼樣?
爸爸,我真的說不出來. 她與我完全是陌生人.
- 比誰先跑到房子! - 等等. 蘇西!
我還沒有跟你說完!
Hi, darling.
- 嗨. - 你好, 甜心.
他不能. 他就是不能.
我都要瘋掉了.
他這把年紀的男人還要藏嬌.
我們所有的努力和計畫都泡湯了!
嗨.
你過去常常跟我交心的.
有什麼事你想說給我聽的嗎?
沒有.
比如告訴我為什麼 安多米達從不靠近你?
或為什麼你的食欲變了?
沃貝娜, 你是個神秘主義者.
神秘主義者? 我不是神秘主義者.
問我所有這些瘋狂的問題.
我不知道你在說什麼.
你知道我在說什麼. 你有些事很奇怪.
你真的沒什麼事想告訴我嗎?
你想讓我告訴你什麼?
我不知道. 你幾乎就象...
- 那不可能. - 我幾乎就象誰?
忘了它, 寶貝. 別管它了.
你是指莎倫?
你在哪里聽說她的?
哦, 沃貝娜.
我必須告訴某個人, 但你必須 發誓絕不告訴爸爸. 你保證?
- 試著使使手腕. - 我知道怎麼跟我女兒談.
她並非完全感覺遲鈍.
蘇珊!
嗨, 爸爸. 剛回來?
- 等一? . 我想跟你談談. - 不知道你有什麼好事.
蘇西!
為什麼你跑開? 我想跟你談談.
我在聽.
- 自在點. - 我很自在. 你想說什麼?
首先, 關於我.
你可能認為我只是你爸爸 在你看起來我又老又古板...
- 你不老, 爸爸. - 當然不老. 我正當壯年.
- 好. 別緊張. - 我不緊張.
你老了就知道人老心不老了...