二战期间的一场战役 市场花园行动的一部分
国防部
是 首相
第一季 第一集
翻|校|监 草草
时间轴 想念Gallifrey的Wholock
后期 8T
宏图大计
告诉我 将军 热线在哪 Tell me, General. Where's the hotline?
哪个热线 Which one?
打给苏联的 The one to Russia.
红热线 先生 The red hotline, sir.
那个在唐宁街 That's in Downing Street.
那么 一旦有紧急情况 So in an emergency
我可以直接跟苏联总书记通话 I can get straight through to the Soviet president?
理论上讲 是的 Theoretically, yes.
理论上吗 Theoretically?
我们是这么跟记者说的 That's what we tell journalists.
事实上 我们有次跟克里姆林宫接通了 In fact, we did once get through to the Kremlin,
但接听的是一位接线员 but only to a switchboard operator.
接线员不能给你转接吗 Couldn't the operator put you through?
我们也不知道 那人不怎么会说英语 We never found out. Didn't seem to speak much English.
多久测试一次 How often is it tested?
他们尽量避免测试得太频繁 Well, they try not to test it too often.
这往往给另一边造成不必要的恐慌 It tends to create unnecessary panic at the other end, and
事关核武器时 panic is always a good thing to avoid
总归还是避免恐慌比较好 是吧 where nuclear weapons are concerned, don't you think?
是啊 Yes.
就是这个 Now, this is it.
很好 Good.
这是什么 What is it?
触发机制 首相 The trigger, Prime Minister.
-触发机制 -核武触发机制 核按钮 - The trigger? - The nuclear trigger, the button.
这个吗 This?
是间接的 对 Indirectly, yes.
这是与皇家海军舰艇诺斯伍德联络的 This is the telex communication with
电报通信装置 HMS Northwood.
您发送一条加密信号 You send a coded signal
诺斯伍德的电报员 and the telex operator at Northwood
会发送一条验证信号 would send an authentication signal.
他好确认真是您 So he knows it's from you, you see.
指令得到验证 And when the instruction's been authenticated,
目标指示也明确后 and the target indication made,
诺斯伍德将向我们的一艘 Northwood would sends a command
北极星潜艇下达命令 他们就按下按钮 to one of our Polaris submarines and they press the button.
就这样吗 Just like that?
就这样 Just like that.
完全听我号令吗 When I say so?
完全听您号令 When you say so.
难道就没人会反驳我吗 Wouldn't anybody argue with me?
现役军官要服从命令听指挥 Serving officers obey orders without question.
如果我喝醉了呢 What if I were to get drunk?
整体上说 您还是别喝醉更安全 On the whole, it would be safer if you didn't.
老天爷 Blimey!
这就是您的工作 是您想要的 首相 Well, it's your job and you wanted it, Prime Minister.
如果我发疯了呢 Supposing I were to go off my rocker?
那内阁可能会发现 I think the Cabinet might notice.
别指望了 I wouldn't count on it.
不 说真的 No, seriously, I mean,
假如我下了令 然后又改主意了呢 supposing I did and then changed my mind?
那没事 反正也不会有人知道 Well, that's all right. No one would ever know, would they?
一共有多少枚核弹 How many bombs are there?
四艘北极星潜艇 每艘16枚导弹 Four Polaris submarines, 16 missiles on each.
每枚导弹三枚核弹头 Three warheads per missile.
-但具体是多少枚核弹 -192枚 - But how many actual bombs? - 192.
每枚的威力都是广岛的那枚五倍以上 Each one at least five times the power of the Hiroshima bomb.
我知道您在想什么 I know what you're thinking,
"不算多" "Not very many."
我不知道 这应该够了吧 I don't know. I suppose that's enough.
苏联可是有1200枚导弹瞄准了英国 Not with 1200 Soviet missiles trained on Britain,
准备立即实施报复打击 waiting to retaliate instantly.
1200枚 1200?
不过 英国向来能绝处逢生 是吧 Still, Britain's always fought against the odds, haven't we?
与无敌舰队斗勇 不列颠之战 The Armada, Battle of Britain.
是啊 当然了 Yes, of course,
等三叉戟来了 我们手里的火力 and we'll have a great deal more firepower at our disposal
可就多多了 when we get Trident.
但幸好目前还有常规部队 I the meantime, thank goodness for conventional forces!
首相 我们的常规部队 Prime Minister, our conventional forces
也就能挡住苏联人 would hold the Russians for
至多72小时 at most 72 hours.
就这样吗 Is that all?
所以一旦有紧急情况 So in the event of an emergency,
我就得马上做出决断 I would have to make an instant decision?
不不 No, no, no,
您可能会有12小时 you'd probably have 12 hours.
12小时 12 hours?
我们难道不该想想办法吗 Shouldn't we do something about this?
是该 We should,
但20年来 but for 20 years,
政客们一直说 our politicians have told us,
他们没钱建立一支足够强大的常规部队 they can't afford the conventional forces to do the job.
常规部队是非常昂贵的 首相 Conventional forces are terribly expensive, Prime Minister.
还是按按钮便宜得多 Much cheaper just to press a button.
我们该把会议长度定为多长 So how long should we allow for this meeting?
-72小时 -好 - 72 hours... - Fine.
只不过是新西兰高级专员罢了 It's only the New Zealand High Commissioner.
72小时有点过了吧 Isn't 72 hours a bit generous?
不 我是在想我们能挡住苏联人多久 No, I was just thinking how long we could hold the Russians.
不过 如果我们能说服美国人 Still, if we could persuaded the Americans
加强他们的常规部队 to strengthen THEIR conventional forces...
我想不会有什么用的 I don't think it'll make much difference.
据说 驻德的美国军队 Well, apparently, the American troops in Germany
都嗑药嗑得 are all so drug-ridden,
不知道自己是哪边的了 they don't know which side they're on anyway.
上次北约军演时 And during the last NATO exercises,
美国军队自行解散 the U.S. troops dispersed
带着女兵们去树林里野餐了 and picnicked in the woods with lady soldiers.
那其他北约军队呢 What about the other NATO armies?
他们还好 They're all right.
至少工作日里还好 On weekdays, anyway.
工作日 Weekdays?
对 荷兰 丹麦和比利时军队 Yes, the Dutch, Danish and Belgian armies
周末要回家 go home for the weekend.
所以整体上来说 如果苏联人真要入侵 So on the whole, if the Russians are going to invade,
我们更希望他们在周一到周五之间来 we'd prefer them to do it between Mondays and Fridays?
这是众所周知的事吗 Is this widely known?
如果我知道 苏联人肯定也知道 Well, if I know it, I'm sure the Russians do.
克里姆林宫往往能先得知北约防御信息 The Kremlin usually gets NATO defence information
因为要层层报告 10号知道得要晚些 before it filters through to us at Number 10.
所以还得看三叉戟的了 So it comes back to Trident?
等它到后 When it comes.
-如果能用 -如果能... - If it works. - If it wor...
什么意思 What do you mean?
通常来说 新武器送到后 Well, normally, when new weapons are delivered,
核弹头跟火箭会对不上 the warheads don't fit the ends of the rockets.
北极星就是如此 That's what happened to Polaris.
您都懂的 线路错接 芯片故障 You know the sort of thing, wiring faults, microchip failure.
我们好些年里都不能发射北极星呢 We didn't have the means of firing Polaris for some years.
巡航导弹估计也是 Cruise is probably the same.
三叉戟可能也是 Trident might be too.
但这怎么可以 But this is intolerable,
我们应该把制造商告上法庭 we should take the manufacturers to court.
我们不能冒险曝光 这是安全问题 We can't risk the publicity, security
他们拿准了 and they know it!
那我们就换个制造商 Well, we should change the manufacturers.
我们总换的 Well, we do all the time.
问题是 所有制造商都清楚这点 The trouble is, all the manufacturers know that too.
所以才会有枚鱼雷冲上了三明治高尔夫球场 That's why that torpedo landed on Sandwich Golf Course.
三明治高尔夫球场 Sandwich Golf Course?
我怎么没在报上看到过 I didn't read that from the papers.
当然了 Well, of course not.
他们掩盖了 There was a cover-up.
俱乐部成员们次日早上 The members just found a new bunker
发现7号球道上多了个沙坑 on the 7th fairway the next morning.
所以鱼雷也不好使吗 So the torpedoes don't work either?
不不 就是新的不好使 No, no, no, it's only the new ones that don't work.
其他的都没问题 The others are fine.
二战期间设计的那些 The ones that were designed during the Second World War.
40多年前的 Over 40 years ago?
是的 但那时做了充足测试 Well, yes, but they had lots of testing.
现在的那些哪有那个条件 You can't afford luxuries that with the modern ones.
为什么 Why not?
如果真发生了核战争 首相 Well, if there's a nuclear war, Prime Minister,
持续时间不会太长 武器来不及测试 it won't last long enough for the weapons to be tested.
伯纳德 关于英国的国防 Bernard, are there other things I don't know
我还有什么其他不知道的吗 about the defence of the United Kingdom?
我不知道 首相 I don't know, Prime Minister.
我不知道您不知道什么 I don't know what you don't know.
如果您想听听看法 If you did want to know the view,
据我所知 政府首席科学顾问 I know the government's Chief Scientific Adviser
跟国防部持非常不同的观点 sees the problem rather differently from the MoD.
我想马上见他 I'd like to see him now.
稍后一起喝酒或许更好 A late drink might be wiser.
最好别让内阁办公室知道了 Better not to let the Cabinet Office know.
汉弗莱爵士很反感这种事 Sir Humphrey gets very upset.
他不认为首席科学顾问是我们的人 He doesn't regard the Chief Scientific Adviser as one of us.
他不是凭阿纳姆战役赢得了杰出服役勋章吗 I thought he won the DSO at Arnhem.
那也不足以弥补他说话有奥地利口音 That doesn't make up for speaking with an Austrian accent.
而且他更不是牛津或剑桥的毕业生 And he certainly didn't go to Oxford or Cambridge.
他甚至都不是伦敦政经学院的 He didn't even go to the LSE.
首相 您相信核威慑吧 Prime Minister, you do believe in the nuclear deterrent?
是的 Yes.
为什么 Why?
-你说什么 -为什么 - I beg your pardon? - Why?
因为它能威慑 Well, because it deters.
威慑谁 Whom?
你说什么 I beg your pardon?
谁 Whom?
它能威慑谁 Whom does it deter?
威慑苏联人 让他们不来进犯 Well, the Russians from attacking us.
-为什么 -你说什么 - Why? - I beg your pardon?
为什么 Why?
因为他们知道 Well, because, they know
如果他们敢发起进攻 that if they were to launch an attack,
我会按按钮 I'd press the button.
您会吗 You would?
我不会吗 Well, wouldn't I?
是啊 您会吗 Well, would you?
作为不得已的最后手段 是的 我当然会 At the last resort, yes, I, yes, I certainly would.
我觉得我肯定会 是啊 Well, I think I certainly would. Yes.
那究竟什么情况算不得已 And what is the last resort?
如果苏联入侵西欧 If the Russians were to invade western Europe.
但您只有12小时做决定 But you only have 12 hours to decide,
所以最后手段也是第一反应 so the last resort is also the first response,
您是这意思吗 is that what you're saying?
我是吗 Am I?
您不必担心 You don't need to worry.
苏联人怎么会想并吞整个欧洲呢 Why should the Russians annex the whole of Europe?
他们连阿富汗都控制不好 They can't even control Afghanistan.
如果他们真打算做什么 也会是切香肠战术 No, if they try anything, it will be salami tactics.
切香肠战术 Salami tactics?
一片片地来 Slice by slice.
一次一小片 One small piece at a time.
如果他们入侵了西柏林您会按按钮吗 So will you press the button if they invade West Berlin?
-看情况了 -什么情况 - It all depends. - On what?
第一种情况 Well, scenario one.
西柏林发生暴动 Riots in West Berlin,
建筑物着火 buildings in flames.
东德消防队跨境援助 East German fire brigade crosses the border to help.
您会按按钮吗 Would you press the button...?
东德警察也一起来了 按按钮吗 The East German police come with them. The button...?
然后是军队 Then some troops,
有更多军队加入 他们说只是为控制暴动 more troops just for riot control, they say.
然后东德军队 And then the East German troops
被苏联军队接替了 按按钮吗 are replaced by Russian troops. Button...?
然后苏联军队不肯走了 Then the Russian troops don't go.
他们受邀留下 支持公民政府 They are invited to stay to support civilian administration.
平民政府关闭了道路和柏林机场 The civilian administration closes roads and Tempelhof Airport.
您现在按按钮吗 Now you press the button?
我需要时间考虑 I need time to think about it.
-您只有12小时 -是吗 - You have 12 hours. - Have I?
这都是你瞎说的 You're inventing this.
您是现任首相 You are Prime Minister today.
北约总部随时可能打电话来 The phone might ring now from NATO Headquarters.
喂 是 Hello...? Yes.
北约总部 首相 NATO Headquarters, Prime Minister.
您4月能去他们的年度大会上讲话吗 Can you address their annual conference in April?
我本以为可以 现在不敢确定了 I thought I could. I'm not so sure now.
可以 Yes.
第二种情况 Scenario two.
苏联军队演习 "不小心"有意地 Russian army manoeuvres take them "accidentally" on purpose
跨过了西德边境 cross the West German frontier.
-那算是不得已吗 -不是 - Is that the last resort? - No.
好 第三种情况 Right, scenario three.
假如苏联已入侵并占领了 Suppose the Russians have invaded and occupied
西德 比利时 荷兰 法国 West Germany, Belgium, Holland, France?
假如他们的坦克和军队已抵达了英吉利海峡 Suppose their tanks and troops have reached the English Channel
假如他们即将入侵了呢 suppose they are poised for invasion?
-那算是不得已吗 -不 - Is that the last resort? - No.
为什么 Why not?
我们要打核战争也只是为了自卫 Well, we'd only fight a nuclear war to defend ourselves.
自杀行为怎么能算自卫 How could we defend ourselves by committing suicide!
那到底什么情况才算不得已 So what is the last resort?
他们打到伦敦皮卡迪利大街吗 Piccadilly?
沃特福德峡加油站吗 Watford Gap Service Station?
革新俱乐部吗 The Reform Club?
或许核威慑根本没道理 Perhaps the nuclear deterrent makes no sense.
有道理 Yes, it does.
如果苏联人或美国人有核弹 If either the Russians or Americans have the bomb,
那另一方也必须有 then the other side must have it too.
我们不如留着北极星 以防万一 And we might as well keep Polaris, just in case.
我不懂 你什么意思 I don't understand. What are you proposing?
取消三叉戟 Cancel Trident.
把省下来的150亿镑用在常规部队上 Spend the 15 billion pounds you save on conventional forces.
因为您其实并不会真按按钮 是吧 Becasue you wouldn't really press the button, would you?
如果我别无选择 还是可能按的 I might if I were given no choice.
他们绝不会让您处于别无选择的境地 They'll never put you into a situation that you have no choice.
别忘了 他们会坚持切香肠战术 They'll stick to their salami tactics, remember.
好吧 假设我们取消了三叉戟 All right. Well, supposing we cancel Trident
将150亿镑都用在常规部队上 and channel 15 billion pounds into conventional forces,
那我们具体怎么花 what do we spend it on?
-坦克吗 -不 - Tanks? - No,
用在ET上 we spend it on E.T.
外星人吗 Extra-terrestrials?
是新兴科技 Emergent technology.
那是什么 What's that?
智能导弹 目标定位 红外线 Smart missiles, target finding, infrared.
那么谁来操作ET呢 And who would operate this E.T?
您需要一支规模庞大的常规部队 You need a large conventional army.
规模庞大的... A large convention...
我有主意了 I've got an idea.
等等 Wait a minute!
我可能想到办法了 I think I can see how to do this.
首先 我们取消三叉戟 First, we cancel Trident.
对 Yes.
我们也不买巡航导弹了 We don't buy Cruise either.
对 Yes.
然后 我们实施征兵制 Then we introduce conscription.
对 Yes.
我们不仅解决了国防问题 Not only do we solve our defence problems,
还解决了就业问题 we solve our unemployment problems as well.
对 Yes.
首相 征兵难道不是个魄力非凡的政策吗 Prime Minister, isn't conscription a rather courageous policy?
魄力非凡 Courageous?
天啊 是吗 My God, is it?
不不 No, no, no.
在就业充分的时代才是 In times of full employment, it would be.
现在 我们只是让待业青年 But now we'd just give unemployed young people
有事可做 something to do.
教他们一技之长 We'd teach them trades and skills.
或许还能教他们识字 We might even teach them to read.
军队又不会开除文盲 The army never discharged anyone who was illiterate.
说不定能逼他们洗澡 We could make them wash.
我们可以让青年人接受综合教育 We'd give our young people a comprehensive education
以弥补他们接受的综合教育 to make up for their Comprehensive Education.
称之为"国民兵役" Call it "National Service".
把青年人派去进行社区服务 Send the young people out into the community services.
一项政策 我们解决了国防 With one policy, we solve our defence,
教育和就业问题 educational and unemployment problems.
是这样吧 教授 Isn't that so, professor?
这太棒了 This is wonderful.
我都想象到了 I see it all now.
"英国新政 "A new deal for Britain,
哈克的宏图大计" Hacker's Grand Design."
在我们这个岛国的历史上 有时 From time to time in our great island story,
需要一个人扛起重担 it falls to one man...
带领人民走出死荫的幽谷 to lead his people out of the valley of the shadow
步入阳光普照 和平繁荣的高地 and into the sunlit uplands of peace and prosperity.
我之前怎么没想到 Why didn't I think of this before?
因为我们才认识啊 Because we only just met.
你好 亲爱的 Hello, darling!
-午饭吃什么 -你说呢 - What's for lunch? - You tell me.
你要去哪吗 Are you going somewhere?
志愿服务委员会 我都跟你说了 Voluntary Services Committee. I did tell you.
是啊 对啊 Yes, of course.
我就是想着 Well, I just thought
或许能来点炒蛋什么的 a few scrambled eggs or something.
冰箱里好像有鸡蛋 I think there's some eggs in the fridge.
你要我自己炒吗 You want me to do it?
我们说好了 我还要继续工作 Look, we agreed that I'd carry on with my work.
-是吧 -是是 当然 - Didn't we? - Yes, yes, yes, of course.
-外交部电报 首相 -是 - Foreign Office telegrams, Prime Minister. - Yeah.
放在那边 好吗 谢谢 Put them over there, would you? Thank you.
况且 住在这个金鱼缸里本就够糟了 It's bad enough living in this goldfish bowl, anyway.
每次我想出去卖点切片面包 Every time I want to slip out for a sliced loaf,
还得经过十几个记者 I have to walk past a dozen journalists
和50个瞪着我看的游客 and 50 gawping tourists!
毫无隐私可言 There's no privacy anywhere.
才不是这样呢 Now, that's not true.
抱歉 首相 安全检查 Sorry, Prime Minister. Security check.
我可以到处看看吗 Can I just look around?
-是是 请便吧 -隐私呢 - Yes, yes, carry on. - Privacy?
你还可以去花园里散步嘛 You can always walk in the garden.
有60个人在窗边盯着你呢 With about 60 people staring at you from the windows!
简直像在监狱院子里锻炼 It's like exercising in a prison yard.
而且我们居然还要支付这里的房租 And to think we actually had to pay rent for this place.
他们该倒贴钱给我们 They should pay US!
至少挺安静的 At least it's quiet.
安静 Quiet?
一般还算安静 Usually.
那从今早7:30就开始了 That's been going on since half past seven this morning!
-他们总得找地方练习 -那为什么在这里 - They've got to practise somewhere. - Why here?
亲爱的 他们是皇家骑兵卫队 Darling, they're Horse Guards,
那是皇家骑兵卫队阅兵场 that's the Horse Guards Parade.
安全 首相 All clear, Prime Minister.
抱歉打扰 Sorry to bother you.
安妮 你得明白 亲爱的 Annie, you must realise, darling,
从事公职就需要作出牺牲 that a career in public service involves some sacrifice.
好啊 Fine,
你牺牲自己的午餐吧 我要迟了 you sacrifice your lunch. I'm late.
我饿了 I'm hungry!
你午餐吃了什么 What did you have for YOUR lunch?
半根巧克力棒 Half a Yorkie bar.
另一半呢 Where's the other half?
伯纳德 Bernard!
是 首相 Yes, Prime Minister.
午餐吃得好吗 Had a good lunch?
挺好的 谢谢 首相 Quite good. Thank you, Prime Minister.
你在哪吃的 Where did you have it?
在内阁食堂 In the Cabinet mess.
三道菜吗 Three courses?
对 Yes.
有酒吗 Wine?
一杯红酒 是的 A glass of claret, yes.
你想知道我午餐吃了什么吗 Would you like to know what I had for my lunch?
您想告诉我吗 首相 Do you want to tell me, Prime Minister?
什么都没吃 Nothing!
您在节食吗 Are you dieting?
看来有餐饮设施服务你 It seems there are facilities for feeding you
其他私人秘书 and all the private secretaries,
整个内阁办公室 新闻办公室 the entire Cabinet Office, the Press Office,
记录员和打字员和信使 the gardening girls, the messengers,
就我没份 我还住这里呢 but not for me - and I live here!
真抱歉 哈克太太不能为您做饭吗 I'm sorry. Can't Mrs Hacker cook for you?
她出去工作了 She's out at work.
那我们给您找位厨师 Well, we'll get you a cook.
谁来付钱 Who will pay for it?
-您啊 那是您的厨师 -要多少钱 - You will, it's your cook. - How much?
全职是每年八千到一万 Full-time between 8,000 to 10,000 a year.
那我负担不起 I can't afford that!
或许您可以找内阁秘书谈谈 Well, perhaps if you had a word with the Cabinet Secretary.
是 马上叫他来 Yes. Bring him here now.
好 他反正再过几分钟也要过来 Yes. He's due here in a few minute, in any case.
那我们要先开始讨论国家大事吗 So, shall we press on with the affairs of the nation?
去他的国家大事 我想要个厨师 Stuff the affairs of the nation. I want a cook!
好 我会去办的 Yes, I'll look into it.
但现在 In the meantime,
新闻办公室的马科姆·沃伦有事找您 Malcolm Warren from the Press Office would like a word.
好吧 叫他进来 All right, bring him in.
下午好 首相 Good afternoon, Prime Minister.
下午好 马科姆 Good afternoon, Malcolm.
内阁秘书应该随时会到 I'm expecting the Cabinet Secretary, at any moment.
我们可以简短点说吗 So could we keep this brief?
没问题 两件事 Certainly, two things.
第一件 也是最重要的 First and most important,
我们应该谈谈您作为首相的首次 we should discuss your first appearance on TV
电视讲话 as Prime Minister.
那的确很重要 或许还是等到 Now, that is important. Perhaps we ought to leave it
我们有时间好好谈再说吧 until we've time to do it more thoroughly.
另一件事是什么 What's the other thing?
您的华盛顿正式访问 Your official visit to Washington,
当然了 那件事稍次要些 of course, that's slightly less important.
怎么了 What about it?
似乎有很多媒体想去 Well, there's awful lot of press seem to want to come.
让他们去啊 Well, let them.
-这会开销巨大 -马科姆 - It'll be very expensive. - Malcolm!
我将站在白宫草坪上 I shall be standing there on the White House lawn
跟美国总统肩并肩站着 side by side with the President of the United States of America.
国歌奏响 National anthems,
两位世界领袖站在一起 two world leaders together.
我们将向世界宣告 We will tell the world
我们愉快的伙伴关系 about our happy relationship,
我们的团结 决心 our unity, resolve,
或许再称赞几句我的勇气 a few words perhaps about my own courage,
智慧 和政治家风范 wisdom, statesmanship.
你不懂这对我多么重要吗 Can't you realise how important this is to me?
不是对我 是对英国 Well, I mean, not to me, to Britain.
对我们的声望 世界地位 Our prestige, our place in the world,
我在史册中的位置 my place in the history books.
是 首相 Yes, Prime Minister.
进来吧 汉弗莱 Come in, Humphrey.
-坐吧 -是 谢谢 - Sit down. - Yes, thank you.
谢谢 马科姆 Thank you, Malcolm.
马科姆 Malcolm...
汉弗莱 Humphrey!
我在想... I've been thinking...
很好 Good.
我已经做了首相 I've been Prime Minister for,
我想想 三天了 let me see, three days now.
而且您真是位好首相 请允许我这么说 And a very good PM you are, too, if I may say so!
我不是叫你夸我 I'm not fishing for compliments,
但的确是进展顺利 though it has been going rather well,
-是吧 -的确 - hasn't it? - Oh, indeed.
很高兴可以奖励我的旧盟友 Yes, it's nice to be able to reward one's old allies.
朗·琼斯对成为贵族感到高兴吗 Was Ron Jones pleased with his peerage?
是的 首相 Yes, Prime Minister.
他说他的会员们会很高兴的 He said his members would be delighted.
他的会员们 His members?
是的 Yes.
他的工会会员 The members of his union.
国家联盟... The National Federation...
我不是说他 I didn't mean him.
我是指我们的后座议员 I meant our backbencher!
我是想给朗·琼斯封贵族的 不是朗·琼斯 I meant to give a peerage to Ron Jones, not Ron Jones!
老天爷 Bloody hell!
如果能让您宽心 首相 Well, if it's any consolation, Prime Minister,
据我所知他特别高兴 I gether he was awfully pleased.
当然了 I bet he was!
那给朗·琼斯封贵族的事怎么办 Well, what are we going to do about Ron Jones's peerage?
再给他也封一个吗 Give him one too?
无意冒犯 首相 With respect, Prime Minister,
我们不能连着给上院送去两位朗·琼斯勋爵 we can't send two Lord Ron Jones to the upper house.
不然会像是批发的 It'll look like a job lot.
我总得给他点什么 我答应过的 I've got to give him something. I promised.
他喜欢什么 Well, what's he interested in?
他看电视吗 Does he watch television?
他连电视都没有 He hasn't even got a set.
那好 让他做BBC的董事 Fine. Make him a Governor of the BBC.
还有事吗 Anything else?
有 一件小事 Yes, one small thing.
我需要给楼上的公寓配个厨师兼管家 I need a cool-housekeeper for the flat upstairs.
您打个广告肯定没问题 Well, I'm sure you can advertise.
不不 我是指政府的厨师兼管家 No, no, I mean a government cool-housekeeper.
那可就难了 Now, that could be difficult.
-为什么 -那是私宅 - Why? - Well, it's a private home.
只不过刚好在政府建筑里 It just happens to be in a government building.
可我得住在那里 在那里吃饭 I just have to live there, I just have to eat there.
我希望有个人给我做午饭 I want somebody to cook my lunch.
这没什么不合理吧 It's not unreasonable.
对 但就是不可能 No, it's just not possible.
你是说 我可以把这世界炸平 You mean I have the power to blow up the world,
但却不能要炒蛋吗 but not to ask for scrambled eggs?
您倒是可以要 You have the power to ASK for them.
如果我去找德国大使要呢 What if I were to asked the German ambassador?
那可以 Well, that's all right.
那是官方约会 Official engagement,
政府招待处将乐意准备七道菜的大餐 government hospitality will happily provide a seven-course meal
三种红酒加白兰地 with three wines and brandy.
毫无问题 No problem.
你是说 德国大使的午餐 You mean the German Ambassador's lunch
就是政府事务 is government business,
我的就不是 but mine isn't?
没错 That is so.
不仅仅是德国大使 Not just the German Ambassador's,
当然所有大使都一样 of course, any ambassador's.
好啊 Fine.
伯纳德 拿日程簿来 Bernard, get the diary.
周一 我要跟德国大使共进午餐 On Monday, I'll have lunch with the German Ambassador.
周二 跟法国大使吃 On Tuesday, with the French Ambassador;
周三 跟美国大使吃 on Wednesday, with the American Ambassador.
可别忘了英联邦 Mustn't leave out the Commonwealth,
周四 我跟 on Thursday, I'll have lunch
新西兰高级专员吃午餐 with the New Zealand High Commissioner.
联合国有多少个国家 How many countries are there in the UN?
-158个 -很好 - Well, 158. - Good.
那差不多是六个月了 That'll take up about six months,
然后我们再来一遍 then we'll start round again.
首相 您不是每天都能跟 Prime Minister, you're not free to have lunch
大使共进午餐 with ambassadors every day.
有时 还有其他官方午餐 Sometimes, there will be other official lunches.
那更好了 把偶尔空出来的日子补上 Even better. We'll fill up the odd gaps.
我想外交及联邦事务部 I think that the Foreign and Commonwealth Office
可能会对此有看法 might have some views on that.
为什么 Why?
他们总说 They always say that
首相跟大使吃一顿午餐 one Prime Minister's lunch with an ambassador
能毁掉两年的耐心外交成果 destroys two years of patient diplomacy.
我不知道他们对158顿会有何反应 I'm not quite sure how they'd react to 158.
这太荒唐了 这里怎么能没人给我们做饭 It's absurd that we haven't got somebody here to caters for us.
这两个半世纪以来 It's the way things have been done
都是如此 for two and a half centuries.
这就是一锤定音的说辞了吗 That's the clinching argument?
已经用了两个半世纪了 It has been for two and a half centuries.
无意冒犯 汉弗莱爵士 With respect, Sir Humphrey,
但这不可能是用了两个半世纪的 it can't have been the clinching argument
一锤定音的说辞 for two and a half centuries.
因为半个世纪前 Because half a century ago,
它只是用了两个世纪的一锤定音的说辞 it had only been the clinching argument for two centuries,
一个世纪前 它只是一个半世纪的... and a century ago, only for one and a half centuries...
抱歉 Sorry.
汉弗莱 我就不信了 Humphrey, I'm not convinced.
我要个厨师兼管家 I want a cool-housekeeper
而且我要你去给她开份工资 and I want you to see that she's paid for.
我这么说吧 Well, let me put it like this.
您真希望媒体宣布 Do you really want the press to announce
您作为首相的第一件举措 that your first act as Prime Minister
基本上就是给自己涨了 was to give yourself an effective salary increase
八千到一万镑的工资吗 of 8,000 to 10,000 pounds a year?
我们不告诉他们 We wouldn't tell them.
我们别无选择 We have no alternative.
首相的工资和开支必须发表 Prime Minister's salary and expenses must be published.
你是说 我们真的不能不告诉他们吗 You mean, there's really no way that we can't not tell them?
开放政府 首相 信息自由 Open Government, Prime Minister. Freedom of Information.
我们永远应当主动坦诚地告诉媒体一切 We should always tell the press freely and frankly anything
他们能轻松从别的渠道获知的事 that they could easily find out some other way.
肯定有办法解决的 There must be some solution.
两个半世纪来都没有 There hasn't been for two and a half centries.
我们能不能谈谈 Now may we perhaps discuss
政府事务了 首相 government business, Prime Minister?
您刚刚说 您在想... You were saying that you'd been thinking.
对了 Yes.
我想我们都同意 I think we're agreed
我的首相任期到目前还算是很成功的 that so far my premiership has been a great success.
当然了 Oh, indeed.
是啊 我一直在自问 Yes, and I've been asking myself
我能做点什么来延续这样的成功 what can I do to continue this run of success.
您考虑过... Have you considered
娴熟地无所作为吗 masterly inactivity?
不 汉弗莱 No, Humphrey,
首相必须坚定 a Prime Minister must be firm.
没错 那坚定而娴熟地无所作为吧 Indeed. How about firm masterly inactivity?
不 我一定要坚定 No, I shall be firm.
我已决定取消三叉戟了 I've decided to cancel Trident,
将150亿用于常规部队 channel 15 billion pounds into conventional forces
并重启征兵制 and reintroduce conscription.
只此一举 At one stroke,
我们就能解决国防 we shall solve our defence,
国际收支差额 balance of payments,
失业和教育问题 一举多得 unemployment and educational problems all at once.
你怎么说 汉弗莱 What do you say, Humphrey?
您怎么能 You can't just reorganise
就这么完全重构国防部署 the entire defence of the realm just like that.
-我可是首相 -是 但... - I'm the Prime Minister. - Yes, but...
我有这权力 I have the power.
是啊 在法律和宪法规定范围内 Yes, within the law and the constitution
受行政先例制约 and the constraints of administrative precedent,
还要考虑预算可行性和内阁政府 budgetary feasibility and Cabinet government.
所以您是打算买巡航导弹吗 So you plan to buy Cruise instead?
不 我们不再买核武器了 No, we shall buy no more nuclear weapons.
但首相... But, Prime Minister...
您不会私下里主张片面限武吧 You're not a secret unilateralist?
不 我们还有北极星 No, no, we still have Polaris.
北极星是老掉牙的系统了 Polaris is a ramshackle old system.
苏联很可能会开发出 The Soviets might easily develop
多层弹道导弹防御系统 a multi-layered ballistic missile defence system
足以拦截北极星 which could intercept Polaris.
什么时候 By when?
从战略层面上讲 随时都有可能 Well, in strategic terms, any day now.
具体哪年 By what year precisely?
2020年吗 2020?
但那天来得比您想的快 But that's sooner than you think!
你难道是说 这个核武防御系统 Are you saying that this nuclear defence system
能拦截全部192枚北极星导弹吗 would stop all 192 Polaris missiles?
也不是全部 差不多吧 97% Well, not all, no, virtually all - 97%.
那还剩 That would still leave,
大概五枚核弹能打过去吧 what, about five bombs that would get through?
就是啊 仅仅五枚 Precisely, a mere five!
足以炸毁莫斯科 列宁格勒 明斯克 Enough to obliterate Moscow, Leningrad and Minsk.
是啊 但也仅此而已了 Yes, but that's about all.
我倒觉得那该足以 I should've thought it was enough
让苏联人停手 三思了 to make the Russians stop and think.
但这不公平 But it's not fair.
有了三叉戟 我们能把整个西欧都轰平 With Trident we could obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe!
我才不想轰平整个西欧 I don't want to obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe!
但这是核威慑 But it's a deterrent.
是唬人的 我可能都不会用 It's a bluff. I probably wouldn't use it.
但他们又不知道您可能不会用 Yes, but they don't know that you probably wouldn't.
他们可能知道 They probably do.
对 他们可能知道您可能不会用 Yes, they probably know that you probably wouldn't,
但他们又不能确定 but they can't certainly know.
他们可能确定我可能不会用 They probably certainly know that I probably wouldn't.
对 但尽管他们可能确定 Yes, but even though they probably certainly know
您可能不会用 that you probably wouldn't,
可即使您可能不会用 他们也不能确定 they don't certainly know that although you probably wouldn't,
您肯定会用的可能性是不存在的 there's no probability that you certainly would!
什么 What?
归根结底只有一个简单问题 It all boils down to one simple issue.
您是首相 You are the Prime Minister,
大不列颠的首相 the Prime Minister of Great Britain.
您难道不认为大不列颠该拥有最好的东西吗 Don't you believe that Great Britain should have the best?
当然了 Yes, of course.
那就好 Very well.
如果您走进一间核导弹展厅 If you walked into a nuclear missile showroom,
您就会买三叉戟 you would buy Trident!
它动人 优雅 美丽 It's lovely, it's elegant, it's beautiful.
它就是最好的 It is quite simply the best,
不列颠应该拥有最好的 and Britain should have the best.
在核导弹的世界里 In the world of the nuclear missile,
它是萨维尔街的西装 it is the Savile Row suit,
是劳斯莱斯险路 the Rolls-Royce Corniche,
是1945年的拉菲酒庄葡萄酒 the Chateau Lafite 1945.
这样的核导弹 It is the nuclear missile
是哈罗德百货的档次 Harrods would sell you.
我还能说什么 What more can I say?
就是它要花150亿 而且我们并不需要 Only that it costs 15 billion pounds and we don't need it.
哈罗德百货的东西不都那样吗 Well, you can say that about anything at Harrods.
将军 General!
我正想跟你谈谈 I was hoping to have a word with you.
我有件事想听听你的看法 I wanted to sound you out about something.
你不会高兴的 You're not going to like it.
尽管说吧 首相 Tell me the worst, Prime Minister.
这将是个打击 军队会很不高兴 It's going to come as a blow, very unpopular with the services.
但没办法 But, there it is.
-我打算取消三叉戟 -好主意 - I'm planning to cancel Trident. - Good idea.
等等 别太急着插嘴 Now, hold on, don't jump in too quickly.
跟我争辩也没用 我心意已... No good trying to argue, I've made up my...
你说什么 What did you say?
是个好主意 It's a good idea.
-你是说你赞成吗 -当然 - You mean you're in favour? - Absolutely.
-为什么 -我们不需要它 - Why? - Well, we don't need it.
完全就是浪费钱 毫无必要 Complete waste of money. Totally unnecessary.
-我也是这么说的 -您说对了 - Well, that's what I said. - You're right.
国防部都这么认为吗 And the whole defence staff agree?
海军想留着 Well, the navy want to keep it.
是用他们的潜艇发射 It's launched from their submarines.
取消三叉戟 他们几乎就没存在感了 Take away Trident and they'd hardly have a role left.
空军呢 And the RAF?
您可以去问他们 Well, you could ask them.
如果您想听取汽修工的意见 If you're interested in the opinion of garage mechanics.
恐怕 他们想留着 I mean, I'm afraid they'd want to keep it.
他们想用飞机投弹 See, they want to drop the bomb from an aeroplane, you see.
他们就想着 All they're really interested in
驾驶飞机往下面丢东西 is flying around dropping things on people,
虽然技术不怎么样 not that they're very good at it.
甚至无法靠近福岛斯坦利港的机场跑道 Couldn't even close the runway at Port Stanley.
八成都找不到莫斯科 Probably never even find Moscow,
就算找到 估计也投不中 and if they did they'd probably miss it.
但我们要怎么让这项政策获得通过 But how are we gonna get the policy through
如果只有陆军赞成的话 if only the army is in favour?
您知道 首相 As you know, Prime Minister,
国防参谋长的职位很快就要空出来了 the Chief of Defence Staff job is shortly becoming vacant.
严格讲 这次轮到海军了 但决定权在您 Technically, it's the navy's turn, but it's your decision.
如果您任命了一位陆军... Now, if you should appoint a soldier,
当然了 这由您决定 of course, it's up to you.
告诉我 将军 Tell me, General,
您难道不是资历最深的陆军吗 aren't you the most senior soldier?
事实上 我想是的 As it happens, I believe I am.
谢谢 好建议 Thank you. Good advice.
首相 这位是格洛索普太太 Prime Minister, can I introduce you to Mrs Glossop.
-不可思议 -怎么了 - Extraordinary thing! - What?
我可算遇到了一位有些脑子的 Last, I've actually come across a Prime Minister
首相 with a bit of sense.
是吗 在哪 哪个国家这么幸运 Really? Where? Which is the lucky country?
我们的 他打算取消三叉戟 太棒了 Well, ours. He's gonna cancel Trident. Wonderful.
我简直难以置信 I could hardly believe my ears.
没想到你居然喜欢恢复征兵制 I'm surprised you're happy about reintroducing conscription.
征兵制 Conscription.
他没提到征兵制啊 He didn't say anything about conscription.
就是为了这个 Well, that's the whole point, you see.
能降低失业率 赢得选票 Slashes unemployment, wins votes.
我们不能施行征兵制 We can't have conscription.
我们可是精英军队 世界顶级 We're an elite army, best in the world.
专业 强悍 纪律严明 Professional, tough, disciplined.
我们不能招来一群痞子 We can't bring in a mob of punks
怪胎 瘾君子和乌合之众 and freaks and junkies and riff-raff.
25万足球流氓吗 A quarter of a million football hooligans?
在奥尔德肖特驻军镇削土豆 Peeling potatoes in Aldershot?
我猜到你会这么说了 Yes, I thought you'd say that.
那会变成普通军队 Well, it'll be just an ordinary army.
就像赢得了上场战争的那支吗 Like the one that won the last war?
什么机会均等的乱来 就像美国人 I mean, all this equal opportunity nonsense, like America!
他们都不知道派驻过来的军队 They don't know if the troops that are posted to them
是男是女 要等到了才知道 are men or women, not until they arrive.
-有时到了都不知道 -是啊 - Sometimes not even then. - Quite!
还不如留下三叉戟 Much better to keep Trident.
我猜到你会这么说了 I thought you'd say that.
我们得阻止他 你得阻止他 We must stop him, you must stop him.
哪能随便阻止首相 One can't just stop the Prime Minister.
那我们怎么办 What do we do?
我们得拖住他 We must slow him down.
反正几个月后 大部分新首相 After a few months, most new Prime Ministers
都会慢慢僵在原地 are more or less ground to a halt anyway.
-所以呢 -所以 - So? - So.
我明早会去找找 I'll have a word with the American Ambassador
美国大使 tomorrow morning.
好主意 It's a good idea.
我猜到你会这么说了 I thought you'd say that.
你好 Hello!
叫新闻办公室确保 Tell the Press Office to make sure,
BBC和ITN能在白宫草坪上 that the BBC and ITN get good coverage
获得好机位 on the White House lawn. You know,
-能拍到我和总统的特写 -好的 - close two-shot of me and the President. - Excellent.
-那... -之后进入白宫内 - Well... - And then there'll be more photo coverage
还要拍更多照 inside the White House,
就我和总统单独在一起的 just me and the President alone together.
太棒了 Splendid.
-那... -然后再拍摄 - Well... - And then there'll be coverage
我和总统在会谈开始时的样子 of me and the President at the start of talks,
-也就是次日 -很好 - that's the next day. - Excellent.
再之后 拍摄总统对我道别 And then after that, the President say goodbye to me.
如果幸运 他会用左手握住我的胳膊肘 With any luck he'll take my elbow with his left hand,
就这样 you know, like, like this.
他跟西德总理会面时就是这样 He did that with the West German Chancellor.
西德总理 是的 West German Chancellor, yes, indeed.
能不能事先通过使馆 Any chance of ensuring that beforehand
-把这事定下来 -这... - with the embassy? - Well...
这可能有难度 首相 That could be difficult, Prime Minister.
可以请您看看内阁议程吗 May I ask you to look at the Cabinet agenda?
真不知道要这些使馆有什么用 I don't know what we have all these embassies for.
什么时候你拜托他们做点真重要的事 Any time you ask them to do something really important,
对英国重要的事... I mean, important for Britain...
我们不是要谈取消三叉戟的事吗 I thought we were going to discuss scrapping Trident?
本来是的 首相 Well, indeed we were, Prime Minister.
但我想 首先 But I thought in the first instance
您或许最好深入考量一番 that you might think it wiser to go into it thoroughly,
更细致地审视一下 closer scrutiny,
反复考虑一切后果 review all the implications,
毕竟 这可是国防大事 after all, we are discussing the defence of the realm.
你是想阻止我 是吧 汉弗莱 You're trying to stop me, aren't you, Humphrey?
绝对不是 首相 Indeed, no, Prime Minister,
但内阁必须掌握一切事实 but the Cabinet must have all the facts.
-真是新鲜的想法 -嗯... - That's a novel idea. - Well...
我是有特别原因 There is a special reason
认为您或许最好先别提此事 why I thought you might want to leave it for a while.
什么原因 What?
我从美国大使那里得知 Well, I've learned from the American Ambassador
当然了 这是私下说的 informally, of course,
如果我们取消了三叉戟 that they would be very upset
又没另订购 if we were to cancel Trident
他们其他核导弹 他们会非常不满 and not order another of their nuclear missiles instead.
有些话肯定是不好说 Well, there's gonna be some tough talking,
我不如等见到总统后 I might just as well have it out with the President
直接跟他摊牌 when I meet him.
是啊 问题就在这里 首相 Yes, well, that's just the point, Prime Minister.
您知道 Now, as you know,
您跟总统的会谈议程 the agenda of your meeting with the President
必须提前定好 must be agreed in advance.
您不能大老远过去闲谈 I mean, you can't just go all the way over there for a chat.
怎么不能 Why not?
您... Well, you...
您可能想不起该说什么 You might not think of anything to say.
据我所知 如果您的这一提议 And I understand that if this proposal of yours
真被提交给了美国人 were to be put to the Americans,
那么计划将稍有改变 there would be a slight change of plan.
什么计划改变 What change of plan?
您将不会见到总统 Well, your meeting would not be with the President.
而是改由 You would be entertained by
-副总统接待 -副总统 - the Vice-President. - The Vice-President?!
副总统 The Vice-President?!
汉弗莱 你开玩笑吧 Humphrey, you can't be serious!
恐怕不是 首相 I'm afraid so, Prime Minister.
副总统 The Vice-President?
但总统连博茨瓦纳的领导人都接见了 But even Botswana was met by the President.
我在新闻上看到了 I saw it on the news.
博茨瓦纳可没刚取消了三叉戟订单 Botswana hadn't just cancelled an order for Trident.
我相信他们会采取很优雅的方式 首相 I'm sure they'll do it very gracefully, Prime Minister,
解释说总统得了黏膜炎 explain that the President had catarrh
或弄伤了拇指什么的 or bruised his thumb or something.
或者睡着了 Fallen asleep perhaps.
但这场跟总统的会面对于公关至关重要 But this meeting with the President is vital for PR.
那我只能提议 Then I can only suggest
您推迟三叉戟的讨论 that you postpone the Trident discussion.
汉弗莱 首相得表明自己已经上任 Humphrey, a Prime Minister must show that he's arrived,
他得让人看到10号住进了 he must show that there is a new mind
新头脑 硬手腕 and a firm hand at Number 10.
他得让人觉得他留下了印记 He must be seem to have made his mark.
但您做到了 首相 But you have, Prime Minister.
怎么说 How?
一位厨师 A cook...
从内阁办公室餐厅借调过来 seconded from the Cabinet Office canteen?
来公寓给我做午饭 To cook lunch for me here at the flat?
从未有任何一位您的前任做到过的事 Something that none of your predecessors ever accomplished.
载入史册 A place in the history books.
哎呦 I say!
我们让他们知道谁是老大了 是吧 We've shown them who's in charge, haven't we?
绝对的 首相 Indeed we have, Prime Minister.
新头脑 硬手腕 和三叉戟 A new mind and a firm hand and Trident.
载入史册 A place in the history books, you say.
暂时不用把三叉戟写入内阁议程了 Leave Trident off the Cabinet agenda for the time being.
这是我的坚决决定 That is my firm decision.
好吗 All right?
是 首相 Yes, Prime Minister.