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- "That's it, I divorce tomorrow.
- Sorry, Peter told me.
What a waste.
It's horrible. I am so sad.
- "ok?, he is comforted.
- I love When he's jealous.
- Oh, it's Ok.
- She speaks English since ..
She looks at.. porn on the Internet.
- Oh, my God. Can you put your big cock in my pussy.
I spice up my marriage.
- Yes, I do. - Yes, you do?
Oh, I'm so wet.
- I've never liked you. I have lost enough time with you.
- I want to divorce.
- You know she's a bitch.
- Before getting married, we should take a look here ..
To be .. vaccinated.
When a teen wants a scooter ..
The parents take them .. to Garches, visit amputees.
- couple Marronnier.
- I think it's us.
- The day before ..
I tried .. to reconcile with Anne.
I just managed a closer fist to my eye.
- So ...
- Anne Marronnier, do you no longer have as a husband ..
Marc .. here now?
- Oh yes. - Marc Marronnier, ..
You want .. no longer have as a wife ..
Anne ..?
- If I say "no" I get 60000 euros?
I did not ask.
- But he asked me marriage.
- It is a fair return things.
I said so ex-husband, ex-wife.
You can hate each other.
- Thank you. We have already begun.
- Next.
- Can I appeal?
- Goodbye, sir. Next case.
- Pardon me.
Ah. Jean-Georges. - Have you seen the time?
- Like many, I practice two trades.
Literary criticism ..
Night .. and columnist. I go out a lot, ..
I drink .. and without paying.
This evening is no interesting?
- You have a wife is with the toilet ..
.. Pete Doherty.
- I would have laughed, if I had not divorced.
- Shit. She left with?
- Marc Levy.
- Oh, my God!
Taste my latest creation.
"Hello," "And then," "Goodbye."
You drink three.
- "Does what? - You forget everything.
But no one will forget you.
I am here.
- Happiness does not exist.
Love is impossible.
Nothing is serious except the "locked-in" syndrome.
Michel Legrand I have often saved his life.
But ...
Good evening.
And then ... goodbye.
Hello, R2D2.
I saw all scroll my life.
It was boring ...
Good.
Work well.
Bye bye.
Very funny.
Very, very funny.
"Love is a battle lost in advance ..
.. "Against the time."
The 1st sentence is very important.
No. "Lost in advance."
Yeah, that's better.
"The 1st year We buy furniture.
"The second year, We move furniture.
"The third year, we share the furniture. "
Ah.
"She put her hand on my thigh while we watched TV.
"The hand I had asked..
.. "... Was like a plastic glove."
I threw in these 200 pages single-spaced ..
Everything .. my destiny dictated to reveal my peers.
I tore his false nose about monogamy to reveal the truth.
A Marceting campaign for ..
Shop white .. Galeries Lafayette.
No, that's not it.
With Marc Marronnier, marriage totalitarianism..
Holding her .. Solzhenitsyn.
Throw this in the garbage dump. Very good idea.
Asshole.
Want to write books.. Anything.
You know what? You do not present any interest.
You should kill yourself.
It's good idea fo an alcoholic.
Jean-Georges? It's me.
I finished my manuscript.
No question to celebrate I never get out of my life.
- Yeah!
* - pleased to meet you. Our guest, Marc Levy.
* You are here tonight to confirm some information.
* You make your entrance to l'Academie Francaise.
* You know the show. We speak ...
- Oh, no. Not him.
Who is this?
- Alice.
I have something to tell you.
- It is Alice.
She is beautiful, huh?
If I divorce, it is partly because of it.
- I ask you all ..
A minute's silence .. in memory of Nicole.
Could you kindly turn off your mobile?
- Always on time ...
- You're in great shape.
- More than Mom.
- I'm sorry for your mother.
- Who is this girl?
- Yulya, my "ex-wife". My "ex-wife", Yulya.
- Priviet.
- She works on foot.
- Hi, you.
- Some people believe we are in a pop concert.
It is a celebration of mourning.
Madame de Lindois, Nicky ..
.. "Granny" for her grandchildren ...
- She knows it is a funeral?
- In Asia, white is the colour of mourning.
Are we in Bangkok, here?
- She will not change her traditions for you.
- Mom, Dad, not today.
- I bother you?
Can I continue? Thank you.
Nicky, I said, you often talked About your deceased husband ..
.. With which you lived 57 years of marriage.
57 years..
As said ..
Our Lord Jesus, ..
.. "Jainkoak..
.. " betiereko bizia eman dauku.".
- It's Basque.
- "Haren Semearen ..
.. "baitan den bizia."
But he said it in Aramaic.
A woman laughed.
- You sing well Basque.
- And you, you laugh loudly.
- Alice, Antoine's wife.
- Antoine? - Your cousin.
- Ah yes, Antoine.
"Doing? - My grandmother died.
- Oh yes. Mine too.
- He likes your work.
- I also read your work, but I rarely agree.
- I agree with people of opposing views.
- My left breast ..
.. Is bigger, yes.
With heart pulsations, Inevitably, huh...
- "It is not noticeable at all.
- Really?
That's nice.
My condolences.
- I was the cushy one, comfort in private.
And, Alice pick me ..
..opens my mouth and sprays lemon juice.
- A glass? - Thank you very much.
You are a family friend?
Really?
- I know the turtle ..
That .. looks constipated.
Ah damn.
You're really pity.
I want to tinker her. Not you?
- She laughs loudly. You heard his voice?
- What?
- She is the crazy kind.
I am fresh, spontaneous take me in the hay.
I do not like her luscious skin.
- You're in love, look like a goat seller.
I'll do someone else. It's okay.
- These are children.
- So what?
- You're a psychopath.
- Thank you.
- I then committed Three serious errors.
First, I started Michel Legrand in my iPod.
57 years together ...
If they managed, why not us Two generations after, we cannot?
- We steal the champagne? - Excuse me?
- You stole the champagne.
- Oh yes. - Can I have some?
- You can ...
I am training for when I have Parkinson's.
- Ah okay.
What are you listening?
- I do not know.
Guess.
And here is my second mistake.
- I know, this. Michel Legrand.
- Yes. - That's it?
Soundtrack "The Thomas Crown Affair."
- What year?
- What?
- What year? - 68.
- I'm bad with English.
- Yes, can tell. But it is charming.
- I cry when I see "Peau d'ane" (The Magic Donkey).
- You too?
No one cares, when I say that.
- Really? It's weird.
Guys! Marc Marronnier cries watching "Peau d'ane"!
- No, no. I cry the moment..
.. killing the donkey that lays gold coins.
You are...
- Me, when the fairy says not to sleep with his father.
- Yes, this fairy is locked in her box, ..
.. Very conformist.
- It's beautiful.
Looks like a poster.
- I love how you talk about nature.
- I want to dive in.
- You go, like that.
You are full of life, it is unbearable.
- You want to drink from the bottle? - Yes.
- Well, no. - It's here.
I learned to swim here I was 7 years old, with Mr. Rimbourd.
I jumped from there..
For my third triton.. A feat.
I'm crazy about you. Then I ate an apricot donut.
The best donut of my life.
What do you think?
- Where is your wife?
- My wife?
- I hate liars.
- I have not insisted for her to come.
Her family is complicated. So her husband’s...
- I love your family. You were ..
.. Close to your grandmother? - Yes.
She was great.
For example, she voted it left.
She fads.
- Which?
- She hated girls in thong.
- I never wear them.
My feet are filthy.
- You are lovers?
- We look so stupid?
- Yeah ...
- Do you swim?
- No, it is too cold.
- Chochotte.
- No.
Thank you, Lord.
Tell me, little why you say that?
- Allo?
Why would she undressed in front of you?
- This is my third mistake.
Believe what Children say.
You were supposed to tell me?
- Stop sending me your address and code.
Your cousin is my husband.
- I'm not very family.
And then ..
You did not need .. come to tell me this.
You wanted to see me, but you will not dare admit it.
- Pretentious.
- Take a shower, this will relax us.
- You had a shower in your life?
- Yes, no ...
Finally, how is Peau d'ane?
- Still virgin.
- Oh yes. And your feet?
- Still awful.
I just reverse TV on mine.
- For what?
- I do not like winners Who scam my alimony.
Do not look there is nothing, there.
You can ..
.. help me remove my shoe?
- What's going on?
It seems that something is broken.
Oh yeah.
We must go to emergencies.
I can not amputate here ..
Considering the hygiene, you risk diphtheria.
- Really?
- Oh, shut up!
- It's red, it's red!
What you do not like, in life?
- Do not bother wasting time.
- I'm afraid of feeling bad.
- You have not spilled all?
- I reserve some.
- "Doing?
- Nice car. - She is cute.
I have plenty of room.
Then. - But,!
- You're scared, It's funny.
I'm afraid of feeling sick.
- Wait, seriously?
I forbid you. If you want to vomit, I stop.
I am "Vomitphobe".
Doctor? Doctor.
Please.
- Yes?
Put this here.
- He kicked his TV and vomited.
- I was not alone.
- He must have a broken foot. Look.
When I do this it hurts.
It’s broken.
- And? He groaned.
And you?
- Me, AA will.
- Ask him.
You use a this Foot a lot?
- One out of every two.
- We're doing an x-ray. You need anything?
- No, thank you.
- It may be long.
- I will walk again?
- It depends.
- I have ..
Stop by the agency.. see some boards.
We will not ...
- Goodbye.
Go, do not look back.
Do not hold on to me.
Clear this episode from your memory.
- Impossible. Your Indian name is He-who-stinks-of-vomit.
- Alice?
- What?
- How did you get your license?
- We won’t see again.
- So, I call you?
OK.
In the 21st century.
Love is .. an SMS unanswered.
Texting is a form torture very refined.
A day without response we believe in a strategy.
Two days unanswered, we get offended.
3 days without response We fall in love.
Alice left me eight days without a response.
- Yes.
- We stop kisses between men.
- A gothic outfit? you see Amélie Nothomb?
- I am in mourning of me.
Bring me a glass of Destop.
- Hi, sweetie.
- Hi.
She is looped.
- Finally, I like it. It's pretty exciting.
- You look like shit.
- Translate.
I am the saddest person I've ever met.
Unless a saucepan ..
Milk .. overflowing.
- He's not very well. He feels like ...
- Saucepan.
- A pot of milk.
- I get the picture.
- Are you sure?
I love someone ..
Not available .., is fucking with me.
Else I feel great.
- It's too bad. - It's too bad ...
- But We have something to announce to you.
- Have you seen Tatayet?
- Yeah ...
- I do not know if this is the right time, but we're getting married.
- What?
- You take any drugs? I was curious.
Take a tour to the courthouse.
To have a picture.
Divorced.
- Oh, no. We are sure, sure.
- There is also something else.
Marc, I would ..
You to.. be my witness.
- Crisis meeting immediately.
In the bathroom.
- What are you doing?
- In Eastern Europe, there are ears everywhere.
Listen.
You want me to be your witness? All right.
But let me ask you a simple question.
Why do you want marry Kathy..
..the French specialist in libertinism?
- The answer is simple.
Because I love her.
And you find this good enough?
- You, you want to conquer. After, you are bored.
When Kathy is near me, I am..
..happy.
- So, why marry her ?
I'm divorced and I love a married woman.
The marriage is to put people ..
In .. shit.
- For the present, I would say "Kathy, my wife." She ..
.. "Here is Peter, my husband.".
It's stupid, but I am proud.
- It is. What all these personal pronouns?
My wife, my husband, my dog.
I am happy, and you yell at me?
- Sorry.
You're lucky.
As a witness, I had ..
Warn you .. Pierre ..
Love.. decreases with time.
This is ... - Marc.
As a friend ..
I gotta tell you .. that love ..
Grows .. with time.
- But no.
- Here.
Read this.
There.
- There?
"Love does not alter in hours ..
.. "But to survive the tip of the end of time.
"If it is false, and proven to me ..
.. "I have never written and nobody has ever loved. "
- "I never writ, nor no man ever loved. "
- Who is the idiot who wrote it?
- William Shakespeare.
- Ah.
Yes, there's a ...
There are still ...
There is a style.
Why not.
The octosyllabic.
- So?
- I agree.
- Oh, my God.
My fiance is so gay!
- She is on the street.
When a girl arrives late, one can imagine her approach ..
.. her entrance, her silhouette.
The arrival is romantic.
I must tell you something.
we can still ..
.. not fall in love. we can ..
Go back .., but after not.
- Too late. I want you.
I want you to ruin it, You are disrespecting me.
I don't want you to derail me.
I'm hot.
- I love romantic arrival.
There's amnesic arrival.
- Hello.
Excuse me, are you?
- Marc.
Marc Marronnier. Guethary ...
- No, I'm sorry.
- There's aggressive arrival.
I do not wait for other's orgasm to come before mine.
I do not take the pill, and if I am pregnant, I keep it.
- Even not bad.
- Sometimes it is better to go physical.
- Oh, it's hot. It's hot!
- Oh yes.
Terribly effective.
And then ..
At a time .., there ..
True .. the entrance.
- Hello. - Hello.
- We sit?
L'hotel Amour this is a subliminal message?
- Not at all.
I am a man, you a woman. You're heterosexual, too.
I imagine you have ulterior motives?
- At this time, there was only illegitimate couples.
- Yeah.
It's not bad. couples dine, lovers lunch.
It's nice. - Yeah.
Womanisers at work.
- What is worse, this.
2 glasses of white wine.
- No, I'll take tea. Thank you.
- A tea?
- I do not know if coming was a good idea.
- You think I'm ugly is it?
- I don't think you're ugly.
I think you're original, different.
- Yes, well, intriguing. The guy a little cold.
I can be indifferent. This is my problem.
It's complicated. You arrive, and I devised three different entrances.
- Which?
- Something amnesiac another where we fight ..
One .. I tell you that I love you.
And after ...
After I stopped.
Since you arrived, I'm embarrassed, and I don't know how..
It is difficult, because it is in a ratio of seduction.
- Not at all.
Not at all.
We vomited together.
This is so despicable that there is no seduction.
I can finally see a man or which is a not a former or future.
- I do not understand.
- You'll be my only friend man if you want to.
- Oh yeah.
As a gay, but straight.
- You do not believe it?
- I believe in things that exist.
The friendship between men and women, is ...
It is like the wind. We talk, but there is not.
- Do not bother to be so.
- Okay, we won't see each other. Moreover, I will ..
.. Remove your number. Like this ...
- I'll do it too.
Finally ..
..I will do it at home. Bye.
06 27 88 56 57.
- "Sir. Reading committee Gallimard, unanimously ..
.. "Kindly request you no longer bother with your texts. "
- Her, Brazilian.
- Her,...
..hairy pussy.
- With weeds.
While she, ..
Mowed .. this morning.
With the tongue, as the Flanby (Creme Caramel).
- This is limit Marais Poitevin (marshland), with a culture broth.
- The mother, French garden, ..
And .. the girl apricot.
- No, it is lawn or golf green.
- Apricot, I tell you.
And?
- This is a man.
- So what?
Men shave pussy. Not you?
- No.
- Here, although laser cut.
Isosceles triangle, with hypotenuse.
- You should have done your job.
- This is weird. In animals, the rutting season lasts two months.
It lasts all year just for humans.
- Especially in Jean-Georges.
- At the Jean-Georges.
- I'd like ..
It lasts .. January to March.
After ..
I could .. eat and sleep.
I cannot stand, man. I go there every night.
- Do not worry.
With marriage, it will not last.
- Really?
- And you, with Alice? - Alice?
A disaster.
She wants to be friends.
- So what? It is friends.
- Friendship this is like love without sex.
- Without the most interesting.
The important thing is ..
You remember never to call..
- Hello Alice, Marc.
- Ah. Okay?
- Yes, great. I thought of you.
As a friend.
- Yes?
We keep Mario Peter and Jimmy.
* Others, not worth it. OK?
- OK.
Let's go for a walk with this nice weather?
- I have a shooting place Dauphine. An ad for Vogue Homme.
Skip, but I'm busy.
- I love this place. Andre Breton said it was the sex of Paris.
- Oh yeah?
Because it is a triangle with bushes in the middle of the Seine?
- Yes.
* - It is a friendly walk?
- Of course, of course. You know me.
* - Cool.
See you later. * - OK.
- Hi
- Here we are in the right.
- Mario, Peter and Edward, you are playing balls at the same time.
You re-run each time.
You play with your balls, OK?
Jessica, look at me.
You're French. Look at me, mouse. No, do not smile.
Do not look at me. You're a sculpture, forget me.
You gotta kiss Jimmy. You're packing.
You're a bitch, a hottie. Have you ever kissed the other 3.
Now it's Jimmy. And you shall eat the mouth.
You packed.
You gotta go like that. Look.
I want to see the language. Tilt your head.
You open well. You leave the tongue and I want it to be hot.
We are all motivated?
Marc coughs.
- Your colleagues look nice.
- Look, Jessica.
You kiss him like this.
Go.
You understand?
- I'm not sure they understood.
You do not understand.
They have not understood.
Earlier, when I've insulted ..
.. it was. I thought not.
If we do it again, do you mind?
- I do not know.
- With you, life has a taste of guava.
Or papaya. I confuse the two.
What is the difference?
- I do not know.
- This is the 1st time we made love ..
But .. yet it's like ...
Don't you think?
- I do not know.
- You're gonna leave your guy?
- I do not know.
- You want us to be lovers?
- I do not know.
- We'll see you again? - I do not know.
- Why do you repeat that? - I do not know.
- Leave him.
Leave him, please.
Leave him. - No.
- Why?
- When I am available, I won't interest you.
And you know it.
- I do not know.
- You see?
- I do not know.
- "Sir, the peer group Flammarion, unanimously ..
.. "Suggest you give-up any attempt to write. "
- "Sir, following the manuscript sent can you contact..
.. "Francesca Vernisi, Grasset publishing. "
- Hello.
I need to see Ms. Vernisi.
- Yes, and you are?
- Late.
Marc Marronnier.
- Francesca Vernisi.
Pleased.
Yes.
Our receptionist has turista.
- Great.
- Sit down, please.
You have a rapport with Marronnier, the critic ?
- Yes. I apologise for the horrors I've written on your authors ..
Highly talented .. elsewhere.
- It was necessary to express elsewhere, than evenings.
Brief.
Then I read your manuscript. "Love lasts ..
.. "Three years." I love this silly title.
I had a little trouble to enter it.
But there is a small voice, a little music.
I do not know if this is desired.
We receive many, novels small heads slaps.
But all stands. I'm not sure ..
.. The shape is really your priority. But ..
.. That's what living is.
It is a bit pretentious, muscle up ..
..the two third, but I want to publish in September.
This is good ..
.. For us to have 1st novels because there are quotas to fill.
- You do not have to.
- No. That is my glass of water. Based.
- Ah. - Thank you.
As to tenure, you want what?
- 60000 euros?
- We will see later, but the answer is no.
I think we change your name.
- Nobody knows me, except 30 colleagues.
- It's the 30 critics that count, and they will demolish ..
.. Your book. How would you call?
- Yeah. How you spell it?
- Look at these gifts. Sofa, TV.
Look at the way close the door.
"Living in the same town as you." Gerard Philippe.
"Waking up in the morning, a few hundred ... "
dialogues by Roger Vailland.
"Knowing that you are there, so close ..
.. "And never see you ..
.. "Me it's unbearable.
"I had to do something.
"Anything."
Look at this beautiful face. Annette Vadim, 20 years.
The purity who wants to be dirty.
- She is beautiful.
It makes me want save seals.
Sublime.
- I missed ..
The sex scene ..?
- In the 60s, it was considered a porn movie.
- Ah. - Yeah.
So you're published?
- Unfortunately, yes.
Alice does not know.
It is published under a pseudonym.
- I'm so proud of you.
Come here.
- Okay, okay.
We share a weekend together.
- You tell him, about the book?
- If I tell her, she will think I'm misogynistic and leave me.
- She will discovers it.
And then on top of that, you will pass for a liar.
This is the worst, for a woman.
- You think so?
- She'll treat you like shit.
- Well, the Basque country, is very beautiful.
To be honest, it was mostly what we could see from the room.
- That, for example, we have not seen.
This neither.
That's not all.
That was clever.
We have not seen.
We saw.
Was not seen.
We saw.
Not seen, not seen.
We forget.
Not.
Ah yes, there we moved-in.
We saw "re-saw", reviewed, re-reviewed.
Not seen, not seen. Oh yes, yes, because we went out once.
I gotta talk to you of something important.
- You're asking me to leave my husband?
We can not walk without taking the head?
- I want to talk about something else.
You're with him, or with me?
- There you go again?
- We need you to choose? When you talk to him, to us?
- My love, why ruin it? It is there.
Enjoy the moment.
- It cannot continue.
I'm the guy who fills you and after you go home it blossoms.
- You're going too fast.
I will talk to him, but give me time.
- Alice, I'm thirty years old, I want to settle.
Women do not have the monopoly of the biological clock.
- You wanted to say?
- Nothing. Finally, though.
I took photo Of your feet.
- Bastard!
- They are ridiculous.
They look like small LU biscuits.
- It's disgusting. - OK, I delete.
You know, this book.
- The Elle girls she about. What tackiness.
What redneck pessimism.
Feodor Belvedere.
Who does this guy think he is?
- Did you read?
- I could not finish. This is shit, Cioran's supermarket.
Russians are macho.
- Cioran was Romanian.
I understand that a Russian write lyrical stuff like that.
There is a step to cross after 3 years.
- You don't you believe in this teen theory..
Retarded ..?
This dumb confuse desire and love.
- This is a good book about.
It was told it's good.
Really.
- poor Logorhee (words) immature wanker.
Really.
- Yes, you're ...
maybe you are right.
The guy must make love without feelings.
The thing ...
do we have a train at 16h52?
- Alice.
Alice?
What's wrong?
It’s wrong?
What happened to you there? - I'm tired.
Who is it for?
- The flowers? My secretary has worked-it out ..
..today, my love ..
It's been 3 years .. we're together.
That's it.
You do not look well.
- I'm happy.
I'm happy.
- It's going too fast, Alice. You cannot do this to me.
We made love everywhere, here.
You're not going to leave me for Marc. This is the ugliest of my cousins.
Physically, it is inconsistent. You're crazy.
- I'm sorry.
- Pardon, Gentlemen, ladies.
You are very talented.
In a few nights here ..
You have mastered .. our dance perfectly.
- Thank you. Your institution is very welcoming.
- This is very nice, but we must go.
- Thank you.
- Like that, like this, like this.
- No, it's ...
- There would be rabbits at Porte Maillot.
- Really? - Yes.
I never checked.
- Let's check.
- Oh yeah? - Yes.
- OK.
I drank. - I like being drunk with you.
- Really? - Yes.
- Me too.
Lé, look!
- What is it? - A terrier.
- It's not ... Oh, a rabbit flying.
No, it's a pigeon. We do not want to eat you.
- There is no rabbit.
- Rabbit.
- We lied. There is no rabbit.
- I'll never forget this moment.
- We say that when the holidays are finished.
- Okay. I will almost never forget this moment.
- I always forget.
- I hate you.
- You disgust me.
- Out of the question we fall in love.
- Strongly Agree.
- I had to remain anonymous.
- Hello, first.
- Hello. - It is.
I do not know why, Your book is a hit.
Everyone wants to see you, and I ..
Tired to explain .. you're dead.
You're my only living author wanting to be known posthumously.
- I do not want to show me.
- What do you mean you do not want?
You're not Daft Punk.
- But ... Emile Ajar it worked well.
Yes, I know what you're gonna say, I'm not Romain Gary.
- That's it.
- Wait a minute.
It's going too fast. And there is a story behind it.
It's not ...
Listening.
It's a bit long to explain.
I have not spoken to my girlfriend.
Alice is so beautiful.
The feet, it's a detail. When we love, we do not care.
It is so beautiful.
I convinced her to leave her boyfriend to live with me.
- Who cares, about your life.
You're right.
You sit on your 300,000 euros Copyright?
- I am a cursed poet. I am above all that.
It's not ...
Alice ...
Wait, you said how much?
- There are how many languages?
You count?
We cannot compete.
In addition, look.
The engine accelerates.
- This is to replace us. - A woman has put this to harm us.
- To all the shots.
Ah, you have Tenga.
- We have a small amount.
- This is good. - It sells well.
It keeps difficulty. You know?
- Yes, I know. - This is great.
- It avoids the flowers, the restaurants.
- It suits you.
It should be taken. The Tenga ..
It's like .. sex woman in a box.
- Perfect to replace Kathy.
- What?
- Remove, I understand.
- Kathy?
- Oh shit.
Say anything to Pierre.
But it's over.
- But ...
- She spoke English, it excited me. It happen again.
It's okay.
- This is serious, that you didn't mention to me.
Finally ...
It would appeal to Alice?
I'm in love.
* - A phenomenon happens. A book is a bestseller.
* "Love lasts three years," Feodor Belvedere.
* Smells the pseudo.
* There are lots of rumours, we do not know who wrote it.
* Some say that Jean d'Ormesson.
- Ah.
- If it's me, swear not to say a word.
- You're not the right person to teach me my job.
- I'm wary.
- That's what I say.
- The prix de Flore is awarded to Feodor Belvedere..
For his book .. ..
.. "Love lasts three years."
- It is not me, I'm the editor of Feodor.
He wrote a message he asked me to read.
Write like a pig.
"Thank you so much."
Not very original.
"I am extremely touched by this award.
"Especially since I'm not an dead old Russian..
.. "But a young author living."
- It's not you, anyway?
- Of course not.
- "In this room ..
.. "Among you tonight."
Thank you for it.
Thank you for you.
- No, but it's not me. No, it's not me.
This is not me.
No, it's not me.
- Marc, please. Marc, Marc!
* - Shock in the literary circle. We are live ..
* .. du Flore, where we come to learn ..
* .. That Feodor Belvedere is Marc Marronnier.
* - This is not me. You're wrong, it's not me.
* - Marc a statement. Marc, marc.
* This is an unprecedented situation.
- It’s a dream.
* - Marc. Marc.
* - I am busy. This is not me.
- What a big asshole.
- They are gone, you can leave.
- Judas. Worse than Judas, Judette. Judasse.
Editor.
- My son!
You know, Yulya loved your novel.
It is not Tolstoy ' but he likes it.
- This is a nice book. - Thank you.
- It is you who ..
Purchased the jury ..? - No, it's free.
- It's too much, it.
How much it will bring him?
- It depends.
- Great. But there are still taxes.
We go?
At any hour.
- Your father is always?
- This is not my father, but me in 30 years.
- It happens.
Good evening. - Good evening.
What's going on?
- I love what you do. - Ah.
- We're happy it is you.
- Finally.
- Want me to put?
- Your number, eg.
- Ah.
What's going on?
We go for the weekend?
- Feodor Belvedere is anagram of "I'm an idiot?"
- I said that it was not me ..
.. All night.
- stop ..
.. lying.
The most misogynist book Of the year.
The author begs me, told me with me, life has a flavour of pineapple.
- From Dad)
- We talk about the same.
You're a crook to your readers ..
Or .. for me.
So we leave here, because I do not need a crook.
- I wanted to tell you earlier.
I wrote this before I met you.
- This was after your divorce and you were married at the funeral.
- No, not at all.
I was with ...
I was someone else, you changed me.
- Yeah? - Yes.
- Here you go change girl, because I hate bad faith.
- You're jealous of my success?
- In fact, you're still more stupid as your book.
- I apologise for writing bestsellers?
- You're a shit. And your title is wrong.
With you, it lasts less and it is not love.
Needless to say that it is the last time I see you.
- I'll miss you.
And shit.
- If she came out naked at that time the ...
- Coffee. Cognac.
- What's going on?
- This is not a thunderbolt.
- Yes
- Too bad Alice is not here.
- Exactly she probably will never return.
- Ah. - It's over.
- It'll be my fault.
- Like father, like son.
Rabbits are not otters.
- I thought so.
I told you, Yulya.
Marc has something ..
.. To tell me.
- Alice searched in your phone?
- This is because of my book.
That's it.
- Come, let's talk.
- But we never did that.
- You must take me for an hedonistic old fart.
When your mother left me, I never recovered.
And since, well, I'm having fun.
Have you ever tried Cialis?
- I want to know.
- Wait.
Life goes on.
I divorced 40 years. Now, I'm nearly 70.
I can tell you that sexually ..
I still .. under the hood.
- Super.
- Just yesterday evening ..
I beat up .. small. And several times this week.
- No details.
- Your dad is tough.
- Here we go again.
- Our bed is the greatest ..
Tent .. the world. - I hear you!
- It's very nice. Thank you and goodbye, Francoise.
You think it's over, with your news?
- You know the books wreak havoc around.
- You have a name?
- Juliet. Your book saved my life.
I can kiss you. - No, thank you.
If she loves you, You can recover.
Here, Francoise.
- Me it’s Juliet.
- Thank you and goodbye, Juliette.
- Above all, continue. - Count on me.
- Hello, I am Claudine.
- When I was born, you both left. So it has rubbed off on me.
We must not look for the culprit far.
- But do you hear?
"Love lasts three years, it is mom’s fault."
How old are you, Marc?
With your father, it was love. Well, that was another era.
If you really love this ...
- Alice. - If you like it, go ahead.
Charge. Do not give-up before you fight.
I've learned to give up?
Look at my life, my books ..
And .. when I conquered My breast cancer.
All this is achieved without a fight?
What is this generation guys who whine everywhere?
We're real women, we want real ..
Men .., not soft balls.
- Okay, fine. Thank you for your advice.
I will summarize between you and Dad.
Between Cialis and soft balls, I'll work it out.
- Make it so.
- Excuse me, ladies.
- Christelle. - It's pretty, Christelle.
- I thought about her every night, and drank to forget.
With the opposite effect.
A glass please.
Thank you.
You see, it's there.
It is there.
It's everywhere.
Alice.
Success allows me to sleep with anyone ..
And .. anyone can sleep with me.
- You talk alone? You got to stop drinking.
I did not think it would work with you.
The guy from the Goncourt was simple, He was 80 years old. I was desperate.
- And the Medicis?
- It was very boring, no humour, not like you.
You're super funny.
- And the Femina? - Nice.
In bed, not great, but nice.
On the contrary, the Nobel what a blow ..
.. Hell. I recommend it to all.
.. My girlfriends.
- You like Michel Legrand?
- Who?
- I rarely had conversations ..
So .. interesting. I'm upset.
When I in this state of profound exchanges, ..
.. I have to take the air, order to follow, if we take.
I suggest you start ..
.. Monogamous sexual activity, with yourself.
When you're at room temperature, I'm back.
OK.
Jean-Georges, it's me. Come save me.
I helped you once, then you gotta help me here, very fast.
Very, very quickly.
She's really gone?
- The prepubescent? Yes. I put her in a taxi.
- No, Alice.
She left a t-shirt.
- How wonderful. - Yeah.
her fragrance.
Her scent.
- Are you kidding here? What are you doing?
- Leave me alone. Let me.
I want to die. Where is the window?
- Wait till I'm gone.
Well, thank you.
Oh, fuck.
- Have you ever suffered for love?
We know. You know I've never loved.
- I envy you. I have had enough, to be in love.
- The scent makes your Head spin?
Wait, it is I who envy you.
I have always suffered from it.
I would like to know what you're going through.
- I'm a misogynist?
- I'm not very well placed to respond.
But I knew the book would not happen.
Go, good night.
- It is the fault of the book.
- Please.
Silence.
I meant all my friends gathered here ...
Stop putting hands everywhere.
While we're married ..
.. But not dead.
If you want invite us to parties, ..
Costume .. or without costumes ..
It is .. in 2012 and this is not the end of the world.
We continue to offer things.
To me alone, alone or whatever you want.
We are open to all.
- I would say that I am happy because I became a husband.
But mostly, I would say thanks to Kathy, ..
.. I reproduced.
People applaud.
A new "me" is running.
- A new "we" is running.
- I love this crazy. That's it.
Without a common language, I understand the evening when she said ..
.. "Oh fuck!" ..
Or .., "Oh, God. Oh, God. ".
I love you.
- Come on, Marc.
- I'll make a speech. It is the purpose of the witness.
- Happy witness. - Well, thank you.
You take the words of my mouth, because we are all happy for you.
Who would not, against this team ..
Rehabilitating before .. the collective unconscious.
The couple formed ..
..by stuck-up nerd
.. and housewife nymphomaniac.
But ..
.. I would like to say, our beloved couple ..
And .. all the assembly of freeloaders is that ..
What .. you applaud, there is no love.
No, it is an advertisement.
Perfectly a commercial page.
When do we eat the most?
At breaks, and meetings.
Incredible. It is at this time the ..
Change apartment, car, TV.
Let me.
I know what I'm saying.
Let me testify The Witness !
- You're too long.
- society does not need love. it needs a flock ..
..of consumers like you with your forks and knives.
Love ..
.. Not last 3 years does not last an hour ..
Or 3 seconds .. because to last it should exist.
That's all I meant. But I have a gift.
Since love is a lie ..
Might as well cover.. with elegance.
For once, I went to Kabul.
And I found it.
- You're not funny. - The method ..
Taliban ..!
Loyalty couple. With it, ..
If your partner .. not last ...
Bhoo
What?
You know. Shut up!
You are pathetic.
You are pathetic!
Hello?
I give a damn, your happiness. Fuck.
It's over, Alice. It is finished.
Well, I'm going.
* I really have to go. You'll see me again.
* Alice. Alice!
* Alice. - Shut up.
* - You're fucking?
* Yes, I can hear, Someone screwing you.
- He has no self-esteem. He will continue.
* - Yes, Antoine. You have a micro penis.
* incapable to pleasure a smurf. incapable!
- You who told him that?
- Not at all.
- Did not you say that? - No.
- This is not true.
- No. Not at all.
- When is it a micro penis ..
..compared to a small penis?
- It is not the size that counts.
- Why do you say that? You would say it to him?
At the other there.
- I would say not.
- Why do you tell me?
- I do not know I try to reassure you.
- Reassure me? I have a micro penis?
- No, not at all.
- It is not big, but not micro.
- This is not micro. It is between the two, normal.
- Alice.
All it can do a little staging, ..
And .. Normally, I am against the ritual of love letter.
Especially when I'm dropping without warning.
But I wanted to reconstruct Through writing what she broke.
What I wanted to tell Alice was very simple.
I think about it in the morning ..
.. Evening ..
In the street .., ..
.. Walking in the cold.
I did express walking slowly ..
To think of it .. longer.
- Poor idiot.
- I announced Alice that I wait every night ..
..at 7:00pm, where she kissed for the 1st time.
- Mytho.
- Guest of the Grand Journal Marc Marronnier, ..
That .. was awarded the Prix de Flore.
Hi, Marc Marronnier. Do you ..
Love that .. last 3 years?
- Clarification, ..
Nothing .. you invented. In the oriental literature, ..
Tough love .. no more 1001 nights.
- If we calculate 1001 nights, it's ..
...guessing, 2745 years.
That's it. This is a technical debate.
In Tristan and Isolde, you know how long the filter lasts ..
of Love ..? - 3 years?
- Oh yeah.
Alice, I ...
- It is Ali.
- I'm not talking to him.
Alice ..
I .. ...
I love you.
- But what does he do? Oh, fuck!
Cunt.
Phone
- Yes, gone?
* - We talk to you the Grand Journal.
- Really? * - Yes, you'll see.
* - Not too long.
* - Alice, you take me for a childish moron.
* - She is not alone.
- I ...
I am hallucinating.
- Love alters not in hours ..
* .. But survives until the end of time.
* If I am proven wrong ..
* .. I've ever written, nobody has ever loved.
* "Nor I never ..
* .. "Writ, nor I ever loved. "
* - It's not you.
* - It could. - He is crazy.
* - If it looks ...
* Alice, I know you despise me.
* You will be right, because it is media manipulation for you.
* But thanks to you, I know that love is a gamble ..
* .. It's like faith in God.
* You have vampire teeth, and very original feet...
* Have you ever been in love. Really stupid.
* What I'm trying to say ..
* .. Is that I got bored all my life, but never with you.
* This book ..
* .. Which poses many problems us ..
* .. This is the cry of a man suffering ..
* .. Not to have met you.
- It is unbearable.
Unbearable. * - I remember ..
* .. The title of the novel ..
* .. "Love lasts three years."
* Immediately ..
* .. The after-sales service.
- Marc Marronnier is where?
- He's gone from there.
- Taxi.
- Marc!
Marc.
I love you.
- So?
We go? My meter is running.
I am busy.
- No, I am not injured at all. Not at all.
Not injured. Not bad, not bad.
"No man never writ, nor no man ever loved. "
I'm fine.
- Great, this depression.
I would have never thought of. Very good idea.
- I'm not well I suffer there.
- The scope of the declaration live TV, this is ..
.. Awesome. It was daring.
- But it has sprung.
I did not understand love.
- That's what I always thought.
But bravo.
- I want to start to zero.
I want to make a documentary about love.
- I have another idea.
Friends make a home of writer in Australia.
Can I encourage you to go.
You can stay 18 months as you want.
- You get rid of me?
- I say this for your own good.
- That's what worries me.
- Today we love love more than human beings.
This love is killer love in my opinion.
- When Pascal pronounced love of love, I find myself.
Love must be subtracted from love of love. Of course.
- It is a disease. Terrible.
We do not know why we found this person.
In my opinion, love lasts forever.
It lasts maybe 3 years maximum it's physical attraction.
- This is a lovely theory, but it is not serious.
Everyone knows that orgasmic power..
of women is .. are men.
So it does not concern us.
This is bullshit. Bullshit.
- The best way to prolong love is to practice it.
I always recommend it to the church ..
Saying that we should come only.. when fruitful.
We should come especially outside these times.
Female Marmoset ..
When they see .. that their husbands..
..are stolen., go to work.
So I would say that the slogan is ..
.. "If you want your husband to be faithful ..
.. "Or conversely, fuck.".
- There is also love-friendship ..
.. Love-attachment, Love-kindness.
Also, the love of parents for children that does not last 3 years.
Or, if this is not the case, little-ones are in trouble.
There are several kinds of love, and we must remember that to Marronnier.
His theory, also is extremely striking.
- Marronnier annoys me because ..
..there is a lot of certainties.
Statistically it may be, ..
But .. I think you can not ..
Talk .. statistically love.
- So?
- It's boring.
- You do not know anything. Why I ask?
Greece that I can go Melbourne to write.
It's a little conceptual but it is not boring.
- You go when? - Soon, why?
- I have something to tell you.
- Nothing serious?
- I want You to be my witness.
- Oh no. You're not gonna join.
- Do not look like this.
I must tell you.
In fact ...
It happened some kind of, click.
I cannot explain it.
I think that must be it, love.
I took surfing lessons.
- Breathe.
The guy comes, a species ..
.. Blond. everything I hate.
More beautiful than me.
- Bent.
- And then something happened.
- Feel the balance.
- something happened .
- You've done surfing.
- You make me hot.
- Yeah, too.
What is happening to us?
- I do not know.
That ever happened to me.
- You have a depressed look.
- What?
- You have a depressed look.
Women, are like tobacco, ..you need to stop.
- You may be right In addition, I have good taste.
.. Fagot. I like Proust, Visconti, ..
.. Lady Gaga.
Ah.
- We're not fags, us.
We are not pansies.
We are just tired of bitches.
- Okay, but ... Finally ...
- What? - What?
- When you are together, both ..
.. Naked night ...
At one point, you ...
- Wait, stop. It is good, but ..
This .. is mutual. - Ah?
- This is different.
We are in love. This is love.
My friend, the priest, Vanish Le Tallec, ..
.. Just here to connect us with the great All.
- Vanish Le Tallec, the guru comes out ..
Prison ..?
- Why do you judge?
- Would you pay? I finished my service.
I'm going to the beach.
Alone.
- You've already made love today?
- Yes
But I'm not tired.
- Hedonism.
- I drink something.
You want something? - No, thank you.
- There are many degrees of alcohol?
No.
Oh no ...
No! Fuck!
- Welcome to the family.
- Health friends. - Health.
Pass the man drink.
I'll leave this, It's for bicycle pumps.
- Yeah.
What is it? - Pork Gascon.
- It looks good.
- nicely rose soon cooked.
- What?
It can jump generations.
- My great-grandfather was béké.
* All men think They know love.
* But we all know love is a mystery.
* Such a union ..
* .. Is rare, miraculous ..
* .. And sacred.
- Long live the newlyweds.
* - Jean-Georges, Steve I have a surprise for you.
- Do not ruin it.
* - No, I think My gift will please them.
- Do not be stupid.
- Taxi.
Take me there, please.
* - Ladies and gentlemen, Jean-Georges and Steve ..
* .. For you, great, the gigantic ..
* .. The greatest composer in the world, a living legend ..
* .. My absolute idol ..
* M. .. Michel Legrand!
- I ran from Paris I point out.
- I, too, since I know you.
- I was right, you are in love.
- Especially her.
- Especially him.
- Especially her. - Especially you.
Me, not at all.
It's just sex.
But your theory credit of 3 years ...
If we do not see each other for 3 months I met a model.
Extension of.. 3 months?
- Yes. Well, no. Who cares.
I think it would be good not to leave. It would be nice.
- Oh yeah? - Yes.
- Okay, but how far?
Until February 20, or until May 7?
I do not understand well. It changes everything.
- It's going to be okay.
- We count from the first orgasm.
- They have not yet started, it looks like two turtles.
- There are more years. - But people.
- I feel this love story is charming.
Especially since this ... What’s her name? Alice here.
She is a potential troublemaker, so it can last.
- No need to be two to love. I love you, you love me.
- Exactly. - That's it, love.
- I leave you, Ingrid. I kiss you.
If Marc dropped her soon We have the second volume.
Before the summer, this is the jackpot.
- I count the years that remain.
- What do you say? - No, nothing.
My love.
- Alice? I know even who he is.
It is so well with Svetlana. Okay?
Svet and I this is for life.
- It will be 3000 euros.
- 3000, anyway.
- You think I like small school kids. Not at all.
These are DéliChoc.
- It should marry. With me, he was too young.
There is good.
- That's good, " lé, it is good." It can make a good title.
Subtitle: j.y.e.
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