Charlie: HEY POOFS, THIS INTRO'S REALLY STARTING TO PISS ME OFF!
(SHUT UP!)
Anthony: Since when does corn flakes have chocolate chip chunks in it?
Ian: 'Kinda tastes like guinea pig poop though.
Charlie: Hmm hmm, hmm.
Charlie: Hmmhmmhmmhmm huh.
Anthony: AUGH, AGH!
Charlie: GAHAHAHAHA!
Ian: What?
Charlie: BOOZE!
Charlie: BoOOooZE!
Charlie: BOOOOOOOOZE!
Anthony: Hey, shut the hell up! I'm trying to do yoga in there!
Charlie: I won't shut up until I get some freakin' BOOZE!
Ian: Okay, just don't give him any booze because he has that audition tomorrow.
And you know what, Charlie? If you don't nail that audition, we're gonna have to pay for your rent.
Charlie: You don't understand.
If I sober up, lasers will shoot out of me freakin' eyes.
Charlie: JUST GIVE ME SOME FREAKIN' BOOZE BEFORE I CHOP YOUR GODDAMN BALLS OFF!
Corporate Poof: Okay Charlie, we're looking for a cute furry talking creature for our next film. So read the script, and show us what you got.
Sock Puppet: Wow! Today was such a nice day!
Charlie: Ugh... yeah.
I... uh, the tea was delightful, and... ahuh-ahuh.
I just love sunny days like this.
Sock Puppet: Do you want to go outside to play hopscotch with and listen to the Jonas Brothers?
Charlie: Ye- uh-
ALL RIGHT! FUCK THIS, HERE'S WHAT I REALLY GOT FOR YOU WANKERS!
MY NAME IS CHARLIE!
I'LL F**K UP YOUR F**KING DAY!
ALL YOU STUPID POOFS BETTER STAY OUT OF MY F**KING WAY!
I'M BLOWING UP LIKE A MOUNT VESUVIUS!
I'LL SAY F**K YOU F**KING F**KER, IF YOU TELL ME NOT THE CUSS!
Corporate Poof: I'm sorry, Charlie, but i don't think you're a good fit for Disney. I think you-
Charlie: WAAUUUGH!
Corporate Poof: AAAAAAGH!
Charlie: Hey, wanna hear a funny noise?
Ian: Sure.
Charlie: Werleurghaleurghaleurghaleurgha.(I don't f**king know what to caption here. Don't judge me.)
Ian: Whoa, do that again.
Charlie: Werleurghaleurghaleurghaleurgha.
Ian: Leurghaleurghaleurghaleurgha.
Charlie: Leurghaleurghaleurghaleurgha.
Ian: Leurghaleurghaleurghaleurgha.
Charlie: Leurghaleurghaleurgha.
Ian: Leurghaleurghaleurgha.
Charlie: Leurghaleurgha.
Ian: Leurghaleurgha.
Charlie: Leurghaleurgha.
(F**k this s**t. I give up captioning this s**t.)
Anthony: He was twelve stories high and made of radiation.
Ian: Well, I hear that he-
(Off-screen conspicuous noises)
Anthony: Is Charlie drunk?
Ian: No, I haven't let him have alcohol for like a week.
Chalie: AAUGHWAUAUGHAaaaAAaaaAAAGH
I TOLD YOU THIS WOULD HAPPEN!
AAAAAAAAGGGH!
Corporate Poof: I'm gonna sue your ass for stabbing me in the-
AAAAAAaaAAaaaAGH!
Charlie: 'Ello poofs, check out my new channel where I answer your stoooopid questions!
I will have a new video every single week so go check it out, and make sure you subscribe, your dumb f**k!
Okay, maybe I was a little too cruel about that... Um, I love you.
Uh...
Please...
sub- subscribe and... stuff like that.
I just need money for booze, okay.