阿尔法字幕组荣誉译制作 轴翻: @RosRumple 校对： ？？压制：？？ 阿尔法小分队粉丝群：429898998 字母人员大量招募中（可教学）
接下来 Now
共和党这边 On the Republican side
唐纳德·床破 Donald Trump
在密西根、密西西比和夏威夷赢得了初选 Won the primaries in Michigan, Mississippi,and Hawaii
所以现在Aloha不只是问好的意思 So now aloha means their hello
还代表了再见吧 共和党 And goodbye Republican Party
大家 Did y'all
大家都看了他的获胜演讲了嘛 Did you all catch his victory speech?
我就知道你们看了 I thought you did, because
因为每个频道都在放他嘛 He was on every single channel
我觉得尼克频道都在放 I think even Nick JR was running it
*是个幼儿频道
因为我看到了个橙色的玩意在电视上 Because I saw some sort of orange blob on TV
于是 So
嘿 Hey
孩子们 Hey kid
ヽ(･ω･｡)ﾉ Hi
(´・ω・`) Hey
(○’ω’○) Hi
(/≥▽≤/) Hey
嘿 墨西哥人要来杀我们啦 Hey Mexicans are coming to kill us
事情是这样的 So here is the deal
上周罗姆尼说床破是个骗子，是个糟糕的商人 Last week Mitt Romney called Donald Trump a fraud and a bad business man
因为像是床破杂志啊 Because things like Trump Magazine
床破水业啊 And Trump Water
还有床破牛排啊，全都失败了 And Trump Steaks had all failed
于是，在昨晚获胜 So last night after winning
罗姆尼的家乡密西根之后 Mitt's home state of Michigan
床破的获胜演说变得像是产品推销 Trump's victory speech had a little bit of product placement
罗姆尼作过一个演讲 Mitt Romney got up and gave a speech the other day
我带来了些东西 I brought some things up
因为他说 Because he said
我的水业公司破产了 my water company is gone
我表示“真的嘛，我咋不知道呢” I said "it is ? I didn't know that"
我有着非常成功的公司 I have very successful companies
我们既然有水就应该卖水嘛 We should sell water and we have water
这个非常成功 And it's a very successful
我们有床破杂志 We have Trump Magazine
叫做“棕榈沙滩的珠宝” It's called the "Jewel of palm beach"
我所有的俱乐部里都有这杂志 It goes to all of my clubs
都有好多年了 I've had it for many years
这是床破杂志 And it's the magazine
还有葡萄酒全家桶 You have the wines and all of that
超自豪的呀 very proud of that
我们制作最好的葡萄酒，要多好有多好 We made the finest wine. As good wine as you can get any where in the world
还有床破牛排 And we have Trump Steak
恩 That's right
就是这样 床破在一牛排小山旁边发表获胜演说 That's right. Trump gave his victory speech next to a pyramid of raw steak.
他在证明罗姆尼说错了，或者在介绍他的新竞选伙伴 He was either trying to prove Mitt wrong or introduce his new running mate
床破 ------------------- 一堆肉
努力分辨他们吧 Good luck telling them apart
就像在看电视广告一样 It was like watching an infomercial
如果他获选 If he's elected
床破会成为第一个脑门上带贴纸的总统，“电视购物” This would made Trump the first president that come with a sticker ,"As seen on TV"
我觉得吧 I think I think I think
说实话，我觉得我明白这是啥情况了 If we're honest, I think I know what's going on here
床破就是缺乏安全感 Donald is just insecure
我都不知床破是不是真想当总统 I don't know if Trump even want to be president
这家伙只是需要不断地被认可 The guy just needs constant validation
这不是明摆着的吗 That's clear
这不是我们大家都想要的嘛 And isn't that all of us want?
爱？ Love?
爱？也许加点牛排？ Just love and maybe steak
而且如果他得到了他想要的，他也许就会消失了 And if we just give that to him maybe he'll go away
恩 床破先生 So Mr.Trump
床破先生*2 Mr.Trump
床破先生*3 Mr.Trump
我知道你一定在看，因为我叫了你三遍 And I know you're watching because I said your name three times
我只是想让你知道每个人都觉得你很酷 I just want you to know that everyone thinks you're cool
而且你又聪明 Okay, you are smart
你很擅长经营公司 You are good at companies
还有做生意 And businessing
而且毫无疑问你超有实力 And no doubt you're hung like a pool noodle
咋了？ Oh, what's that?
发生了啥？ Oh, what's that?
有电话打进来了 I'm getting a phone call
喂 Hello?
啊 是每个以前嘲笑过床破的高中同学 Oh, it's everyone who made fun of Donald Trump in high school
你说啥？你其实一直偷偷地嫉妒床破？ What's that? You were secretly jealous of him the whole time?
现在你娶的妹子比他少多了？ And now you're married to far fewer women?
好哒，我会转告的 OK, I'll tell him
拜拜，“真实的”电话 Goodbye, real call
再说了，床破你不用竞选总统的 Besides, Donald you don't need to run for president
有比那更酷更精英的职位呢 Because there's an even cooler, more elite position out there
而且这个职位我们都选你 And we've all voted that you are
职位是“美国第一人” It's America's number one man
为了正式确定这个职位 And tonight to make it official
我来给你“美国第一人”奖杯 I'm giving you the number one man trophy
你一定会喜欢的 And you'll love it
上面可都是肉呀 Because it's packed with meat
阿尔法字幕组荣誉译制作 轴翻: @RosRumple 校对： ？？压制：？？ 阿尔法小分队粉丝群：429898998 字母人员大量招募中（可教学）