孩子们 我就是这样打败风筝人的 Right, kids? And that's how I defeated Kite Man.
有谁想提问 Any questions?
- 牛仔服小妹 - 你有宠物吗 - Yeah, Canadian tuxedo. - Do you have a pet?
我有宠物 问得好 I do have a pet. That's a great question.
我有只宠物老鹰 叫鹰鹰 I have a pet named Eagly. He's an eagle.
你有起源故事吗 Do you have a origin story?
来吧 快点下注 买定离手 Let's go. Bets right here. Let's go. Let your money talk.
蠢货 你杀了你哥哥 You dumb fuck, you killed your brother!
你打死了你哥 王八蛋 You killed your brother, you piece of shit!
- “DC宇宙前情提要” - 我应该在监狱里 Truth is, I'm supposed to be in prison.
- 为何 - 超级英雄的事 - For what? - Superhero shit.
- 你是哪位超级英雄 - 和平使者 - What superhero are you? - Peacemaker.
- 你因为什么坐牢 - 因为正直 - What were you in prison for? - Integrity.
我发誓要维护和平 无论杀多少人都在所不惜 I made a vow to have peace, no matter how many people I have to kill to get it.
这是你爸的白龙战甲吧 Your dad's White Dragon costume, right?
- 这地方怎么这么大 - 这是量子展开式储藏间 - How is it so big in this place? - It's a quantum unfolding storage area.
直通正常空间之外的维度节点 It leads to a dimensional nodule outside normal space.
你老爸还是个聪明的种族主义者 Well, I guess your dad's pretty brainy for a racist.
你爸搞种族主义 那你跟他混... And if your dad's a racist and you work with him...
谁跟他混 他帮我打造装备 I don't work with him! He makes me stuff!
看你这副怂包德行 我很犹豫要不要给你头盔 I hesitate giving you any helmet as big a simp as you turned out to be.
不用叫我和平使者 叫克里斯就好 You know you don't have to call me Peacemaker. You can call me Chris.
除了你能为我们打架 我对你毫无兴趣 I have no interest in you other than your ability to fight for us.
你不是被判了终身监禁吗 怎么出来的 I thought you were in prison for life. How did you get out anyway?
- 我替政府工作 - 邮局当差吗 - I work for the government, okay? - Post office?
- 拜托 我替政府杀人 - 够带劲 - Dude. I kill people for them, okay? - Huh? Sick.
尝尝和平滋味 混蛋们 Eat peace, motherfuckers!
最近我总觉得自己是个疯子 You know, lately I'm just thinking I'm a fucking maniac.
我不知道 我有种感觉... Like, I don't know, I'm having feelings about things that--
我觉得只要他父亲在 克里斯就永远不会快乐 I don't think Chris is ever gonna be happy as long as his father's around.
你杀死你哥的时候 我就知道你是个不洁之人 I knew you was unclean when you killed your brother!
你杀了我哥哥 你杀了基思 You killed my brother! You killed Keith.
开枪吧 你个死娘炮 Well, go ahead and do it, you fucking pussy.
你永远逃脱不了... You'll never be able to get the fuck away--
我看过你的档案 克里斯 I read your file, Chris.
那是个意外 你当时只是个孩子 It was an accident. You were a child.
别让烂事定义你的人生 Stop letting that shit define who you are.
我们在对抗外星人 拯救世界啊 Dude, we're saving the world from a fucking alien invasion.
所有队员都负伤了 The whole team is injured,
所以我在想 或许你可以请正义帮来帮帮忙 so I was thinking, like, maybe you could call in the Justice Gang.
我喉咙浅容易吐 I have a real bad gag reflex.
有次我吐了绿灯侠一身 Oh shit. You know, one time I puked all over Green Lantern, I was--
坐他那块绿色魔毯飞得我直晕 I got seasick from flying on a green magic carpet.
邪门的是他居然很享受 The weird thing is he fucking liked it.
你们迟到了 一帮废物 You're late, you fucking dickheads.
这个白痴 What a meathead.
去他的 这家伙到处造谣说我是呕吐控 Screw that guy. You know he tells people I'm a puke freak?
和平使者和变装英雄义警 The Peacemaker and the costumed crime fighter Vigilante
共同为美国政府 执行一项的深度卧底行动 were working in a deep cover operation for the U.S.
代号“蝴蝶计划” government called Project Butterfly.
此项行动在美梦监狱运作多年 It's been running for years out of Belle Reve Prison
直接听命于阿曼达沃勒 under the command of Amanda Waller,
此人实为我的母亲 who happens to be my mother.
鹰鹰 Eagly.
拜托 别闹了 Come on, dude. Stop it.
干什么 What?
现在外面冻死人了 老天 It's too cold outside. It's too cold outside. Jesus!
好了 鹰鹰 在这飞两圈得了 外面太冷没法带你遛弯 There, Eagly. You want to fly, fly. It's just too damn cold to take you outside.
喂 Hey.
早上好 Mornin'.
滚你的吧 瞧你这副地穴僵尸的鬼样子 Fuck you then, you Cryptkeeper-looking bitch.
鹰鹰 Eagly?
鹰鹰 差不多行了 Eagly, come on, bro.
鹰鹰 别把自己太当盘菜了 Eagly, taking an awful lot for granted.
我不是你的佣人 懂吗 I don't work for you, dude. Okay?
我出狱了有时间陪陪你 Just because I'm out of prison and we spend a lot of time together
不代表你就能支配我 doesn't mean you determine how that time is spent.
才一天没带你出去放风 The one fucking day I don't take you out,
你就大早上弄醒我 当我是奴隶 you wake me up like I'm your fucking slave.
把身份理理清楚 咱俩谁是人谁是鹰 We need to start making clear who's the human
我是人 而你... and who's the eagle. I'm the human and--
蠢货 你在干什么 Dumbass. What are you doing?
(绝顶三巨头)
(艾弗格林哨兵报)
(三巨头再立奇功)
你没事吧 伙计 You okay, pal?
又梦游吗 你的脸色活像见了鬼 You sleepwalking again? You look like you've seen a ghost.
和平使者 第二季第一集
本WEB版外挂字幕由 风吹来的那片云 双语合并
“第一章:血脉磕绊”
(六个月后)
看你从你爸家出来还是很奇怪 It's still weird seeing you come out of your old man's house.
- 现在是我家 - 是啊 - Mine now. - Hell yeah, it is.
小琪回电话了吗 Hey, Keeya call you back?
抱歉 Sorry.
那丫头接受不了真实的我 Girl can't deal with me being me.
- 那是她的问题 - 确实 - That's her problem. - Deffo.
该死 我现在改走硬核路线了 Shit. I mean, I'm about hardcore shit now.
这就是我的生活方式 That's what I do.
她不能接受这一点 Her not being able to accept that
就等于不能接受我这个人 对吧 is like her not being able to accept me, right?
我不知道 也许她只是不想你送命 I don't know. Maybe she just doesn't want you to die.
你也见过我独当一面的样子 You've seen me handle myself.
- 我像是短命的样子吗 - 难说 - What, you think I look like I'm gonna die? - Maybe.
- 你滚一边去 - 好吧 硬汉查尔斯布朗森 - Get the fuck out of here. - Okay, Charles Bronson.
拜托 你知道我有两下子 Come on, man. You know I got moves.
我只是说人都会死 好吗 I'm just saying. We all might die, okay?
- 再强的人也会送命 - 包括你 - Happens every day to people tougher than you. - And you.
不包括我 我这么强的人 通常只会老死 No, not often. You know, people as tough as me, they normally die of old age.
- 有统计数据为证 - 我的妈 - That's just stats. - Jesus.
差点忘了 我有名片了 I almost forgot. I got business cards.
- 快欣赏一下 - 真是... - Check them out. - Oh, that is...
(阿德巴约安保咨询 可靠 时髦 致命)
真的... really...
够酷 cool.
- 这女的是谁 - 是我 - Who's the woman? - That's me.
好吧 看着有点... Okay. Well, she's, um, kind of...
- 憔悴 - 见鬼 你就非扫兴不可 - Gaunt. - Damn, man. You really killing my vibe.
- 跟哈考特有联系吗 - 有 - Talk to Harcourt lately? - 'Course.
昨天还见面了 We hung out yesterday.
她基本上原谅了我在电视上 She's mostly forgiven me for airing out
公开X特遣队的丑事 Task Force X's dirty laundry on TV.
她有没有提那个... Did she say anything about...
哪个 Like what?
不知道 她有没有提到我 I don't know. She say anything, like, about me or anything?
比如什么 Like what?
我不知道 I don't know.
没有 No.
- 阿德 多谢你送我 - 乐意效劳 - Hey, Ads. Thanks for driving me. - Happy to do it.
有时候这些人真的很自以为是 Sometimes, these guys can kind of be up their own asses, you know?
- 超人类 - 对 - Metahumans? - Yeah.
总爱说屁话 Sometimes, they say some not-so-great shit.
- 比如呢 - 比如说我蠢 - Like what? - I don't know. Just like I'm stupid.
说我顶个迪斯科球在脑袋上 That I'm wearing a disco ball on the top of my head.
嘲讽我说 为什么要发誓 不惜代价当个混蛋 And they'll be like, "Hey, why'd you take a vow to be a douchebag at any cost?"
还有说“泽西海岸”第一季打电话 And they'll say, "Hey, the first season of Jersey Shore called,
要我把发型还回去 it wants its haircut back."
说得好像一个破节目会打电话似的 As if a fucking TV show could call you on the phone.
都是些蠢话 好多我都记不清了 Just fucking stupid stuff. I can't remember much.
反正就是嫉妒我肌肉比他们的大 I know it's 'cause my muscles are bigger than theirs, but jeez, right?
你现在是超级英雄了 You're a superhero now.
你拯救了世界 You saved the fucking world.
等等 Yo,
你确定是这里 are you sure this is the place?
应该是 I think.
(克兰克玩具)
没错 Yeah.
我不想再当笑话了 I don't want to be a joke anymore, Ads.
这是我梦寐以求的 成为一个真正的英雄 This is all I've ever wanted, you know? To be a real hero.
你认真的 Are you for real?
他们会敲锣打鼓抢着招募你好吗 They're gonna be doing backflips to get you to join.
欢迎你 和平使者 我是马克斯维尔劳德 Welcome, Peacemaker. I'm Maxwell Lord.
我的劳德科技公司是正义帮的赞助商 My company, LordTech, finances the Justice Gang.
和我一起的还有两位创始成员 绿灯侠和鹰女 With me are two of our founding members, Green Lantern and Hawkgirl.
很高兴见到你们 Hey. It's really nice to meet you.
盖 咱们又见面了 Guy, great to see you again.
- 请坐吧 - 好的 先生 - You can have a seat there. - Yes, sir.
希望我们称呼你和平使者 还是克里斯 Would you like to be called Peacemaker, or do you prefer Chris?
都可以 Either's fine.
- 麦克风关了吗 - 关了 记上‘优柔寡断’ - The mic is off? - Yeah. Mark that down as indecisive.
- 记哪 - 这儿 - Where? - There.
这里 Here?
不是 那里 你看 No, there. Look.
凭什么让我干这活儿 How'd I get stuck with this job?
就你的字能看 You're the only one whose handwriting is legible.
克里斯 介绍下你的技能 Chris, can you tell us a little about your skills?
- 我的技能 - 对 - My skills? - That's right.
你能为正义帮带来什么特殊技能 What sort of skills would you bring to the Justice Gang?
给男人口交不算 Besides blowing dudes.
闭嘴 盖 Shut up, Guy.
我是世界上最顶尖的射手 I'm considered the finest marksman in the world.
不限枪械 是任何武器 Not just with firearms, with any weapon, really.
- 会杀人 记上 - 记哪 - Yeah, he murders people. Write that down. - Where?
我还精通近身搏斗 I am also... proficient in hand-to-hand combat.
- 暴力倾向 - 别捣乱 盖 我能处理 - Volatile tendencies. - Guy, chill out. I've got it handled.
- 我有各式头盔 - 归到“反社会人格” - I have a variety of helmets. - Put it under sociopathy there.
每个头盔有不同功能 Each one has a different power.
和平使者 正义帮要尽量避免伤亡 Peacemaker, we at the Justice Gang try to avoid casualties.
如今我们这种组织里的超人类 Metahumans like the ones in our organization
越来越不受民众信任 不能再火上浇油了 are becoming more and more distrusted, and we can't afford to stoke the fires.
我知道 这我懂 I know, I know.
档案显示你曾因一级谋杀坐过牢 It says here you served time for first-degree murder.
是的 没错... Yes, that's true, but--
- 你杀了几十个人 - 大部分是出于正当理由 - And that you have killed dozens of other people. - Most of those are for good reasons.
- 哪些不是 - 你说什么 - And which ones weren't? - Excuse me?
你杀的哪些人不是出于正当理由 Which people did you murder not for good reasons?
这个... Well, um...
老实说 I'm gonna be honest.
我过去对暴力行为一直没什么底线 I haven't always been discriminating about violence.
但最近我开始直面自己的童年创伤... But lately, I've been coming to terms with the... the trauma I had as a kid.
- 开始了 - 爆米花还有吗 - Here we go. - Is that popcorn still here?
- 我哥哥基思死在我眼前 - 你爱惨了爆米花是吧 - My brother Keith dying in front of me. - Oh my God, dude. You love popcorn.
我父亲强行给我灌输的暴力文化 The culture of violence imposed by my father.
这爆米花是低卡的 最近我屁股变大了... It's low on calories. Plus, my butt's been getting really big lately, so...
我不想变成他那样 I don't wanna be like that.
不想被过去的经历和愤怒支配 You know, I don't wanna be, like, ruled by my past experiences and anger.
我还嫌我屁股不够翘 老实说我裸着时就像根棍子 My butt's not big enough. Honestly, when I'm naked, it's just like a line.
我一直说 我珍视和平 不惜大开杀戒来维护和平 And I've always said I cherish peace with all my heart no matter how many people I need to kill to get it.
还要面试几个 西海岸来的全是废柴 How many more of these do we have today? The West Coast has been a wash.
- 不好意思 - 这货太烂了 - Excuse me? - This guy sucks.
打扰下 Excuse me.
也许有点奇怪 可我是不是 不该听见你们吐槽 Um, this is gonna sound weird, but am I supposed to be able to hear you guys?
你说什么 Excuse me?
一上来说我优柔寡断... You know, just... like a while ago, you said I was indecisive and then...
然后说我暴力倾向 you brought up violent tendencies.
刚才你们又聊起了各自的屁股 And just now you were all talking about your butts and stuff.
还说我很烂 And also, you said that I suck.
- 现在能听到吗 - 听到了 - Do you hear me now? - Yeah.
现在呢 And... now?
听到了 Yes.
该死 Fuck!
一点也不好笑 混蛋 这玩意故障多久了 It is not funny, motherfucker. How long has this been like this?
我猜一整天了 I'm guessing all day.
一整天 All day?
- 设备谁搞的 - 盖 - Who set it up? - Guy.
拜托 我又不懂音影设备 我让斯坦弄的 No, hey, I am not an A/V guy. I had Stan do it.
- 那个保镖 - 人家多才多艺好吧 - The bodyguard? - He is more than just his occupation.
见鬼 盖 他的工资可不包括... God damn it, Guy! He is not paid to--
- 我能怎么办 - 史密斯先生 和平使者 抱歉... - What do you want from me? - Mr. Smith, Peacemaker, I apol--
天老爷 我提了多少次 那兔女郎紧身裤勒出的鲍鱼线 Oh my God, how many times did I mention that rabbit woman's camel toe?
少说有三十次 I must have said it 30 times.
不顺利 Didn't go so well?
据说我的技能之一是给男人吹箫 Apparently, one of my skills is sucking dick.
- 啥 - 没错 - What? - That's not a put down.
这不是贬低而是夸赞 去他的 That's a fucking compliment. Fuck them.
谁稀罕加入那个破团伙 I don't want to be in their lame group anyway.
活见鬼 What the fuck?
我仔细审阅过你的履历 After poring over your résumé,
研究了你过去18年的情报工作经验 examining your past 18 years working in the intelligence field,
我也对在这18年间 as well as the extensive interviews I've conducted
与你共事过的人做了大量访谈 with your coworkers throughout those years,
当然 我们之间 还就你的人生进行了漫长讨论 and, of course, our lengthy sessions together discussing your life,
综上 我得出的结论是 I've come to the conclusion
你有极其严重的“有害男子气概” you suffer from a particularly severe form of toxic masculinity.
什么 What?
- 我他妈有阴道 - 我想是的 - I have a fucking vagina. - I assumed.
我哪来的有害男子气概 How could I have toxic masculinity?
哈考特女士 必须指出 Ms. Harcourt, I have to say,
认为只有男性才会患 有害男子气概的想法 I find the insinuation that only men can suffer
略带有性别歧视 from toxic masculinity a bit sexist.
- 性别歧视 - 你符合所有诊断标准 - Sexist? - You have every symptom.
压抑情绪 有攻击性 暴力倾向... You suppress your emotions. You're aggressive and prone to violence. Oh yeah? Yeah?
- 第三版精神疾病诊断手册写的 - 现在是第五版了 - That shit's in the DSM-III there? The toxic masculinity? - The DSM-5 now.
- 你维持着强硬的外表 - 拿我的脸说事 - You do your best to maintain a hard appearance. - So my face?
凭我的脸就能给我下这么个瞎扯淡 I'm getting some sort of a bullshit hyper-independence.
根本不存在的诊断 You maintain non-existent diagnosis based on my face?
那我也给你的脸下个诊断 你是个烂货 I'll give you a diagnosis based on your face? You're a fucking cunt.
拜托 这没必要记下来吧 Come on, man. You don't have to write that shit down.
在英国这词是朋友的意思 In England, cunt means friend.
国家安全局委托我评估 The NSA has entrusted me to decide who does
雇员的心理素质是否达标 and who doesn't have the psychological wherewithal to be employed by the agency.
我的履历无可挑剔 My record is exemplary.
我为国效力 I served my country.
我做了所有国家需要我做的事 I did everything, everything that it asked of me.
在中情局 国安局 和天眼会都做到问心无愧 At the CIA, here at the NSA, at ARGUS.
戈弗雷女士 请送哈考特女士去大厅 Ms. Godfrey, please escort Ms. Harcourt to the lobby.
现在你跟我扯这么一通鬼话 And now you come at me with this nonsense as some sort of rationalization
为所有人都心知肚明的真相打掩护 for what we both know is really going on.
阿曼达沃勒此刻 也许正在应付国会听证 Amanda Waller may be facing congressional hearings,
但她照样有能力 让全美所有情报机构封杀我 but she still has enough power to black-book me from every intelligence agency in America.
- 哈考特女士 - 医生 我这辈子 - Ms. Harcourt. - I have only been trained
就只接受过这一种训练 to do one thing my entire life, Doc.
你告诉我 我现在还能做什么 So you tell me what the fuck am I supposed to do now?
这该死的人生 What a fucking life.
我只想说 他们的做法不对 I just want to say, I don't think what they're doing is right.
我很感激你在蝴蝶计划中的贡献 I'm grateful for what you did with Project Butterfly.
不是所有人都认同 他们处理这件事的方式 Not all of us are on board with the way they're handling this.
该死 Fuck! Fuck!
嘿 Hey.
老天 你的手怎么了 Jesus, what happened to your hand?
没事 不过砸了仪表盘两拳 Nothing. I just, uh, beat up my dashboard a little bit.
那东西自找的 That motherfucking thing had it coming.
上次我坐你那辆车 Yeah. Last time I was in that car,
它竟然放纺纱博士 还是30秒上火星乐队的歌 I was playing some Spin Doctors, or Thirty Seconds to Mars, or some shit.
我当时就想砸了它 I was gonna kick its ass then,
但看你好像挺喜欢就忍了 but you two seemed like you were on good terms, so...
我可不喜欢“30秒上火星” 别胡说八道 I am not on good terms with Thirty Seconds to Mars. How dare you?
- 面试怎么样 - 美妙无比 - So how's it going? - Peachy.
可不是 你全身都散发着丧气 我都不知道为什么要问 Yeah. That's the vibe you're giving off. I mean, I don't even know why I asked.
- 有事吗 - 没啥 - So what's up? - Not much.
(催款单)
刚好在附近 Just, uh, you know, in the neighborhood,
就想来问问你的面试怎么样了 wanted to swing by, see how your interview went.
完美 Perfect, yeah.
我被国安局拒了 还有中情局 联邦调查局 国防情报局和国安部 Now I've been turned down by the NSA as well as the CIA, FBI, DIA, and DHS.
所有该死的情报机构都不会雇我 The entire fucking alphabet of intelligence agencies.
- 我不需要 - 不行 得冰敷一下 - I don't need that. - Yes, you do. You gotta ice it.
好了 There.
曝光沃勒的是阿德巴约 干嘛给我使绊子 Adebayo's the one who outed Waller anyway. Why is she torturing me?
不能把气全撒在自己女儿身上 She can't take it all out on her daughter, I guess.
我的面试也烂透了 希望这能让你好受点 If it makes you feel any better, my interview also sucked.
并没有 我知道 你多想加入超级英雄的阵营 It doesn't. Obviously, I know you wanted that superhero thing.
- 你来就为这事 - 对 - So that's it? That's why you came? - Yeah.
好吧 多谢关心 Okay. Thanks, I guess.
除非你还有别的事想说 Unless there was something else you wanted to talk about?
- 比如什么 - 我哪知道 - Like what? - I don't know.
好吧 Okay.
那天晚上究竟发生了什么 What happened the other night or something.
我指在船上 On the boat?
- 派对船 - 现在记起来了 - What, that party boat? - You remember now?
我只记得我根本不想去 I remember I didn't want to go on it.
可我看你很起劲 想去得不得了 Seemed like you wanted to go on it then. Like, vigorously.
起劲个屁 我说了我不喜欢船 也不喜欢派对 No, I didn't. I told you. I don't like boats. I don't like parties.
我怎么可能想去派对船 Why the fuck would I want to go on a party boat?
我只是打个比方 I was speaking metaphorically.
- 但我们上了一艘真的船 - 随便吧 - We went on an actual boat, though. - You know what? Fine.
你同意上船是因为我说风景好 You agreed to go on the boat 'cause I told you the views would be nice.
- 我说的是在船上的时候 - 我喝醉了 - I was talking about when we were on it. - When we were on it, I was drunk.
- 我也是 - 也许你也记不太清了 - Yeah, so was I. - Well, maybe you don't remember much either.
我记得大部分 - I remember most of it. - All right.
好吧 那你应该比我清楚 那事发生了就发生了 Well, then you probably know more than I do that it was fine. It happened.
无所谓 但依然个错误 Whatever. But it was also a mistake.
嘴上说不记得 其实记得很全 You remember a whole lot for not remembering.
真不多 酒精和烂事都有助失忆 谢天谢地 Not much. Alcohol and fuckups both foster amnesia, thank God.
- 烂事 - 不确定还能是什么 - Fuckups? - Not sure what else it would be.
好事 Good?
克里斯 随便吧 All right, Chris, whatever.
你愿意这么想也行 但到此为止吧 If that's what you want to think, that's fine. But it's also the end of it.
好 我都不知道为什么提这个 Fine. I don't know when-- why we're on all this anyway.
我来只是想关心你面试的 The only reason I came here is to ask about your interview.
- 糟透了 - 棒极了 我得到答案了 - It went shit. - Great. Great. There's my answer.
- 对 - 这趟来值了 - Yep. - Great. Trip well worth it.
- 再见 - 再见 - Bye. - Bye!
(有备无患)
(义警来电)
艾德里安 Hey, Adrian.
伙计 你听 Dude, listen.
- 是猫头鹰 - “好” - It's an owl. - Okay.
棕榈鬼鸮 Northern saw-whet.
- 什么 - “猫头鹰的品种” - What? - That's the kind of owl it is.
哥们 我对猫头鹰了如指掌 Dude, I know a shitload about owls.
好吧 我不方便闲聊 在工作 Okay, I can't talk right now, man. I'm working.
你从美梦监狱搬回来了 Hey, you moved back from Belle Reve yet?
对 但要到明天才有空跟你玩 Yeah, but I can't hang until tomorrow.
- 考考我 - “什么 ” - Quiz me. - What?
现查一个关于猫头鹰的小知识 看我能不能答上来 About owls. Look up owl facts and then see if I know the answer.
好吧 等等 Okay, hold on.
(奇怪的猫头鹰小知识)
我就是猫头鹰界的雨人 Dude, I'm like Rain Man, but with owls.
好吧 雨人 听这一题 Okay, Rain Man, here's one.
猫头鹰的眼球是球形的还是管状 Are owl's eyes orbs or tubes?
- 球形 - “错 是管状” - Orbs. - Nope, they're tubes.
- 少来 怎么可能 - 上面就这么写的 - Fuck off, how can they be tubes? - I don't know, that's what it says.
管状怎么在脑袋里固定 不会掉出来吗 Well, how do they stay inside their heads? Why don't they just spill out onto the floor?
我不知道 I don't know.
“要是管状的” Well, you think every time you're stepping through the forest,
“那森林里满地都是猫头鹰眼珠子” there'd be owl eyes everywhere if they were tubes.
- 我猜是血管 - 什么 - Veins, I guess? - What?
- “眼珠子靠血管连着 ” - 是吧 - They're attached by veins? - Sure.
好吧 再考我一个 All right, give me another one.
你根本不懂猫头鹰 You don't know anything about owls.
我懂 见鬼 I do, though. Fuck.
算了 All right, well then,
- “你还想聊什么 ” - 没了 - what do you want to talk about next? - Nothing.
- 跟和平使者有联系吗 - “只通过电邮” - Have you spoken to Peacemaker? - Just through email.
他最近似乎很沮丧 He seems bummed-out lately.
本以为拯救了世界后 I think he thought that after saving the world,
所有人都会把他当成英雄 everyone would finally treat him like a-- like a hero.
艾德里安 你在干什么 Hey, Adrian, what are you doing?
打电话 戴夫 你看我像在干什么 I'm on the phone, Dave. What does it look like I'm doing?
那个“戴夫”来了 Quote-unquote "Dave" is here.
回去干活 伙计 你那区一团乱 Well, get back inside, man. Your section is a fucking mess.
戴夫当洗碗工的时候还比较酷 那时我们还是朋友 Dave was way cooler when he was a dishwasher back when we were friends.
- 没有的事 - 我还去参加你婚礼了 - We were never friends. - Then why did I go to your wedding?
你他妈不请自来的 艾德里安 Because you showed up fucking uninvited, Adrian.
- 我得挂了 - “不要啊 讨厌” - I guess I gotta go. - Oh no, shoot.
但我们聊得很开心对吧 Great conversation, though, right?
对 比昨天 前天 乃至我搬来 Yeah, it's probably even better than yesterday, or the day before that,
美梦监狱后的每一天都开心 or every single day since I moved to Belle Reve.
- 对 每天都精彩 - 艾德里安 你个傻缺 - Yeah, well, they're all pretty good. - Adrian, you fucknut!
我这就来 吼个屁 你个傻缺 I am coming! Chill out, you fucknut!
为什么学我说话 Why are you saying the same thing I just said?
- 这词是你的专利 - 什么 - Words belong to you now? - What?
抱歉 我不知道“傻缺”被你注册了 Sorry, I didn't know you copyrighted fucknut.
“没错 以后每说一次都欠我十个亿” I did, and you owe me a billion dollars every time you say it.
该死 Oh, fuck.
(天眼会来电)
伊克诺莫斯 Economos.
- 看到了吗 - “看到了” - You seeing this? - Yeah.
你那边有什么异常吗 Anything unusual from your vantage?
没有 No.
“过去调查一下” Approach and investigate.
收到 Copy that.
“必须拿出解决办法” There has to be a solution.
“过去两个月内 已经发生三起 超人类从美梦监狱” This is the third metahuman escape from Belle Reve
“和阿卡姆疯人院越狱事件” or Arkham in the past two months.
“我们必须想办法保护民众” We've got to find a way to protect people
“脱离这一日益严峻的生存威胁” from what is rapidly becoming an existential threat.
- 弗莱格将军 - 什么事 - General Flag, sir. - What is it, Bordeaux?
记得一月份那件事吗 Remember that January thing?
- 克里斯史密斯事件 - 那个故障 - The Christopher Smith thing? - The glitch?
不见得是故障 因为刚才又发生了 I'm not sure it was a glitch because it just happened again.
和我们今年夏天 在大都会监测到的信号类似 It's similar to what we picked up this summer in Metropolis.
- 路瑟事件 - 申请访问你的电脑权限 - The Luthor Incident? - Permission to access your computer, General.
谁在监视那栋房子 Who's surveilling the house?
前黑帽成员约翰伊克诺莫斯 Former black hat by the name of John Economos.
对 Oh, right.
- 是你指派他的 - 我记得 - You put him in charge. - No, I remember, yeah.
- 抱歉 我当初质疑也是... - 因为他和目标关系密切 - Excuse me. I questioned it because... - 'Cause he was close to the subject.
虽然我知伊克诺莫斯和任何人 都没法密切 I don't know how close John Economos can be to anyone, sir,
但他们在X特遣队共事也是事实 but yes, they worked together in Task Force X.
伊克诺莫斯 我是弗莱格 Economos, it's Flag.
听着 我现在就在房子外面 Hey, dude, I'm outside the house right now.
- “看出什么异常了吗 ” - 定义一下“异常” - You see anything unusual? - Define unusual.
“你为什么老这么欠揍 ” Oh, why do you always have to be an asshole, Economos?
可能我脑内化学物质失衡吧 I don't know, probably because I have some major chemical imbalance issues, sir.
- 约翰 - 好吧 没什么不寻常的 - John! - No, nothing overly unusual.
什么鬼 What the fuck?
- 怎么了 - 没什么 - What? - It's nothing.
就是人们在乱搞 开性爱派对 It's just people having sex. Like an orgy.
- 什么 - “群交” - What? - Group sex.
我听懂了 老天 这人怎么回事 No, I... I heard you. Jesus, what is it with this cat?
克里斯托弗史密斯向来放荡不羁 Christopher Smith is notoriously free-spirited.
“史密斯 他也参与其中吗 ” Is he one of them? Smith?
- 什么其中 - “群交的其中一员” - One of what? - One of the people in the orgy.
- 是的 - 好 Yes.
保持高度警惕 有情况就通知我 All right. Stay on high alert. Let me know if anything else comes up.
收到 Copy.
再派一名探员盯着伊克诺莫斯 Send in another agent to watch over Economos.
- 我不信任他 - 是 长官 - I do not trust him with this. - Yes, sir.
本案件升级为天眼会一级优先事件 And let's move this case to ARGUS Priority One.
一级优先 Priority One?
对 必须查明 这个异常光点是怎么回事 Yeah, we need to figure out what this blip is about.
绝不能再重蹈维度裂缝 导致星球撕裂的覆辙 Last thing we need is another dimensional rift tearing up this planet.
(输入)
(绝顶三巨头击败彩虹生物)
(三巨头决战极端人 拯救哥谭市)
怎么在这傻站着 What are you doing out here?
我以为你在布鲁德海文 I thought you were in Blüdhaven.
基思 Keith?
你还好吧 老弟 You okay, man?
不好 No...
浑身酒气 跟狐朋狗友出去鬼混了 You smell like a distillery. You out with the boys?
对 Yeah...
两个傻瓜干什么呢 克里斯珀 我以为你在布鲁德海文 What are you knuckleheads doing? Chrisper, I thought you were in Blüdhaven.
我刚也这么说 Yeah, that's what I said.
三剑客重聚 Well, the three amigos are together again.
值得喝一杯庆祝一下 I believe that calls for a celebration.
别看你一大把年纪 脑子还挺清楚 Yeah, that's pretty clear thinking for a man of such advanced years.
臭小子找打... Why, you, I oughta...
别比划了 老头 小心伤着自己 Pow, pow, pow! Hey, here, old man, before you get hurt.
住手... Hey!
- 怎么 - 没事 - What? - Nothing.
“没事 没事 我漂亮的头发” "Nothing, nothing."
“没事 没事” "Nothing, nothing."
我想起那次回到家 Reminds me of the time when I came home.
你当时多大 才12岁吧 What were you, like, 12 years old or something?
又来了 Here we go.
克里斯满屋乱跑 And there's Chris running around the house.
身后追着三十多个只有膝盖高的... He's being chased by 30 of these knee-high--
- 那东西叫什么来着 - 小妖 - What the hell do you call them things? - Imps.
没错 被小妖追着乱跑 Imps, yeah. Running around.
我问他 克里斯 你搞什么鬼 I go, "Chris, what the hell are you doing?"
他瞪着我说“没事” He looks at me and goes, "Nothing."
没事 Nothing?
老天 过了一周基思才告诉我 Oh my God. It was a week before Keith told me.
我不想打小报告 No, I didn't want to narc.
结果是克里斯珀在八扇门后的 小矮人维度里乱翻 Chrisper's rummaging around the munchkin dimension eight doors down.
不是小矮人 老爸 是小妖 They're not munchkins, Dad. They're imps.
他想偷人家的巨型薄荷糖 Trying to nab one of them giant peppermint sticks.
三个月后 我在道奇车的引擎里 I found a dead, rotting imp inside the Dodge engine block,
发现只腐烂的小妖 like, three months later.
那臭味我根本没法形容 I cannot stress how fucking bad it smelled.
那算什么 You think that's bad.
有天早上我吃谷物圈 发现碗里有黏糊糊的玩意 The next morning, I was eating my Cheerios, and there's something sticky in there.
大概是哪个小王八蛋在里面打飞机了 I think one of those little fuckers jacked off in there or something. Yeah.
不可能 我不记得有这事 What? No. No. That didn't happen. I don't remember that part.
又是你的奥吉式添油加醋吧 That's the famous Auggie embellishment right there.
没错 都是你的错 Yeah, and it's your fault.
这小子太招人爱了 You gotta love that boy.
要是没有他日子该多轻松 Life would have been a lot easier...
- 可没有他乐子少一半 - 没有他乐子少一半 But half as much fun without him.
说真的 老爸 More importantly, Dad,
究竟要打败多少只小妖 你才能记住它们的名字 how many goddamn imps you gotta fight before you remember what they're called?
去他的小妖 Fuck those imps!
百威淡啤 Bud Light.
有问题吗 加勒比海盗 You got a problem, Jack Sparrow?
我夸你呢 宝贝 It's just a compliment, babe.
是吗 Oh yeah?
有哪次你对小妞吹口哨 她会说 There a time you whistled at some chick and she said,
多谢你赞美 "Thanks for the compliment,
突然发现你沾满精液的胡子 和阳痿气场好性感 我们上床吧 I suddenly find your cum-soaked beard and micropenis energy hot. Let's fuck?"
我敢说从没有过吧 Willing to bet no, right?
我甚至敢说你只能靠花钱 In fact, I'm willing to bet no one's ever fucked you
或者恐吓才能有上床机会 for any reason other than money or fear.
- 这贱女人欠收拾 - 你确实欠 - Bitch is looking to get swatted. - Yeah, you are.
别冲动 女士 Calm down, lady.
该死 Oh shit!
疯婆子 你少嚣张 Stay down, you fucking nutjob.
你是不是有病 What the fuck is wrong with you?
滚吧 贱人 Bye, bitch.
我去睡了 明天还有重要的事 I gotta go to bed. I got a big day tomorrow.
晚安 老爸 Night, Pops.
晚安 儿子 Night, son.
- 我爱你 - 爱你 - I love you. - Love you.
我也爱你 小子 Love you too, buddy.
还跟你前任有联系吗 You still talking with the ex?
- 前任 - 是啊 - The ex? - Yeah.
你今晚怎么了 What's up with you tonight?
不 我还没... No, I haven't--
要我说那事是你搞砸了 老弟 I gotta say, I think you blew it with that one, bro.
你该再争取下的 I think you should give that another shot.
虽然她和那个锅盖头搞在一起了 但是... I mean, I know she's with that... jarhead and all, but...
- 是吗 - 是的 - Yeah? - Yeah.
- 好了 晚安 小老弟 - 基思 - All right. Good night, brother. - Keith.
我爱你 I love you.
滚一边去你这醉鬼 我也爱你 Get out of here, you drunk asshole. I love you too.
这是什么 What is it?
一条魔法隧道 It's a magic tunnel.
魔法隧道 A magic tunnel?
所以你不知道吗 So, you don't know what that is?
他从来没跟你说过 He's never told you anything about that?
没有 你又是怎么知道的 No! How do you even know about it?
老瑞克弗莱格当上局长后 ARGUS has been monitoring Peacemaker
天眼会就一直在监视和平使者 ever since Rick Flag Senior was named director.
他知道克里斯杀了他儿子吗 Does he know Chris killed his son?
知道 所以他不惜挥霍纳税人的钱 Yeah, so he's wasting taxpayer money
找人全天候蹲守他 就盼着他露出把柄 having him surveilled 24/7 in the hopes that he screws up.
几个月前 And a couple months ago,
马瑞达尔雷达发现他家有异常信号 Maridal radar picked up an anomalous signal coming from his house.
马瑞达尔雷达专门探测 外星和灵质能量 Maridal detects known extraterrestrial and ectoplasmic energies.
我知道那东西 Yeah, I know what it is.
本来以为是个故障 但昨天异常信号又出现了 We thought it was a glitch. And then yesterday, it happened again.
然后我看到了这个 And that's when I saw this.
懂了吧 我完蛋了 Hello, I'm fucked.
是哦 Right.
我该怎么办 他是和平使者 懂我意思吧 So, what do I do? I mean, it's Peacemaker, you know?
- 他就像... - 朋友 - He's like... - Your friend.
这有点牵强了 Now that's pushing it,
但我也不想坑他 but I don't wanna totally screw the guy over.
然后我想到了你 But then I think about you.
我 Me?
对 你帮过他 Yeah, you tried to help him,
现在你和哈考特的人生全毁了 and now yours and Harcourt's lives are completely fucked.
喂 我可没毁 Yo, I'm not fucked.
你活在“侠盗猎车手” 最噩梦的关卡里 You're living in the worst level of Grand Theft Auto.
那是因为我被琪亚赶出门了 That's because Keeya kicked me out.
因为你把最高机密泄露给了媒体 And because you shared top secret information with the press,
现在“运动之足”鞋店都不会雇你 and now you can't get a job at fucking Athlete's Foot.
“运动之足”在招人吗 Athlete's Foot is hiring?
也许吧 Maybe.
追加提问 “运动之足”还开着 Follow up question. Does Athlete's Foot still exist?
开着 泰瑞镇购物中心有个店 Yes, there's one in the Terrytown mall.
真让人欣慰 That's comforting.
你得先找克里斯问清楚 Look, you need to talk to Chris and find out the story
别急着把消息透露给天眼会 before you go sharing shit with ARGUS.
你不能这样对他 You can't do him like that.
要是被人看到我跟他接触 我会被解雇的 Look, if anybody sees me talking to him, I could get fired.
说不定这就是天眼会在考验我 It could be ARGUS testing me for all I know.
这下我懂了 Now I get it.
- 懂什么 - 你不是来找我讨主意的 - What? - You ain't here for no advice.
行了 我会去找他问问情况 Fine, I will talk to him and see what's up.
- 把照片隔空投送给我 - 好 - Just-- just AirDrop me the photo. - All right.
来了 Okay.
- 发了吗 - 发过去了 - Did you AirDrop it? - Yeah, there you go.
- 天啊 兄弟 你认真的 - 该死 发错了 - Oh my God, bro, really? - Oh shit. Nope. No, no, wrong one. Hold on.
- 辣眼睛 - 那不是我的老二 - God damn. - That's not my dick.
(南方无赖 “灵蝎”乐队)
(河内狂摇乐队)
(给我蜂蜜)
你是谁 Who the fuck are you?
我可以解释 I can explain.
- 等等 我... - 我不知道你是不是变形怪 - Hold on, man. Just-- - I don't know if you're a shapeshifter or what.
- 我只是... - 非法闯民宅 - Just-- - Breaking and entering into a man's home?
这理由够充分了... That's solid justification for me--
启动魔法星 Activate magic stars.
等等
怎么能把纺纱博士 和30秒上火星相提并论 Can't be looping Spin Doctors in with Thirty Second to Mars.
纺纱博士强太多了 Spin Doctors is so good.
就是 随便一个乐队 都比30秒到火星强 Oh, jeez. Anybody's better than Thirty Seconds to Mars.
我当年加入的那个车库乐队 都能秒杀他们 That garage band I was in for two seconds is better than Thirty Seconds to Mars.
待续
谢谢观赏