德州西部部分地区发布了龙卷风预警。 There's a tornado watch for a portion of West Texas.
布莱恩·查德威克就职于斯威特沃特县警长办公室。 Brian Chadwick is with the county sheriff's office in Sweetwater.
我们正努力向社区宣传，让他们振作起来。 We're trying to get the word out to the community to brace themselves.
我们希望这件事不会发展成一个真正的漏斗…… We hope this thing's not gonna develop into a real funnel...
但萨拉戈萨事件后，我们不能冒险。 but after Saragosa, we're not taking any chances.
国家气象局表示，风暴正在向东北移动。 The National Weather Service says the storm is moving northeast...
除了一些降雨，它应该不会影响达拉斯-沃斯堡地区。 and with the exception of some rain, it shouldn't affect the Dallas-Fort Worth area.
这就是新闻、体育和天气预报。 这里是KGAB电台谈话新闻，我是弗兰克·卡塞尔。 That's news, sports and weather. I'm Frank Castle for KGAB talk radio news.
从孤星州的中心， From the heart of the Lone Star state,
现在是达拉斯最受欢迎的脱口秀时间， it's time for Dallas' most popular talk show,
巴瑞·尚普拉的《夜话》。 Night Talk with Barry Champlaign.
♬坏到骨子里♬ ♪ Bad to the bone ♪
KGAB的电话线路已经开通并准备好接听您的电话… The KGAB phone lines are open and ready for your call...
555-TALK。 at 555-TALK.
现在有请《夜话》的主持人，巴瑞·尚普拉。 And now your host for Night Talk, Barry Champlaign.
今晚最坏的消息是…… The worst news of the night is that...
四分之三的人说他们宁愿看电视也不愿和配偶做爱。 three of four people say they'd rather watch TV than have sex with their spouse.
第二个坏消息是昨晚有些孩子需要钱买可卡因， The second worst news is that some kids needed money for crack last night,
所以他们把刀插进了一位80岁老奶奶的喉咙… so they stuck a knife in the throat of an 80-year-old grandmother...
就在达拉斯的欧几里得大道。 down on Euclid Avenue right here in Dallas.
在一个美国城市的一夜。 One night in one American city.
再乘以几百个城市，你会得到什么? Multiply that by hundreds of cities and what have you got?
一个文化意味着色情和恐怖电影的国家; A country where culture means pornography and slasher films;
道德意味着贿赂、贪污、内幕交易; where ethics means payoffs, graft, insider trading;
在那里正直意味着撒谎，嫖娼和醉酒。 where integrity means lying, whoring and intoxication.
这个国家有大麻烦了，各位。 This country is in deep trouble, people.
这个国家已经烂到骨子里了，最好有人来做点什么。 This country is rotten to the core and somebody better do something about it.
把你的手从那碗油炸玉米片里拿出来，扔掉你的《国家询问报》， Take your hand out of that bowl of Fritos, throw away your National Enquirer,
拿起电话，举到你面前…… and pick up the phone, hold it up to your face...
拨555-TALK。 and dial 555-TALK.
张开你的嘴，告诉我我们该怎么处理这个国家的烂摊子。 Open your mouth and tell me what we're gonna do about the mess this country's in.
谈话电台，这是镇上最后一个社区了。 Talk radio-- it's the last neighborhood in town.
人们不再互相交谈了。 People don't talk to each other anymore.
让我们接通第一位来电者。 Let's go to the first caller.
这个国家今天的很多问题有很多… A lot of problems with the country today have a lot do...
随着对第三世界国家的持续剥削。 with the continued exploitation of the third world countries.
等等。第三世界国家?你在哪儿学的这句话，大学吗? Wait. Third world countries? Where'd you learn that phrase, in college?
你知道这是什么意思吗?你跑题了。 Do you know what it means? You're getting off the track.
我们不是在偏离轨道，而是在前进。 We're not getting off the track, we're getting on.
乔什，回学校去。你毕业后给我打个电话。 Josh, go back to college. When you graduate, give me a call.
这一独特的美国制度的一个主要例子是: A prime example of that uniquely American institution:
忧心忡忡的慷慨自由派…… the concerned bleeding-heart liberal...
寻找那些有自己问题的人。 looking for people with problems he can call his own.
-弗朗辛在奥克林。-我是个异装癖。 - Francine in Oakline. - I'm a transvestite.
我在为手术攒钱 I'm trying to save money for an operation--
你觉得我的听众对你的外科冒险有什么兴趣? What interest do you think your adventures in surgery hold for my listeners?
有些事我得跟你谈谈。我不喜欢。晚上说话。 It's something I have to talk about. I don't. Night Talk.
让我帮你挂断。你在巴瑞的咖啡里放了睾酮? Let me put you on hold. You slip some testosterone into Barry's coffee?
这家伙今晚被附身了。他有点紧张。 The guy's possessed tonight. He's a little tense.
滚出去! Get outta here!
有时我下班回家，我们一起吃晚饭，你知道吗? Sometimes I come home from work and we have dinner together, you know?
不，我不知道。你和你的猫在餐桌上吃饭? No, I don't know. You have dinner at the table with your cat?
用桌布和蜡烛吗?不,巴瑞。 With a tablecloth and candles? No, Barry.
只有她自己的盘子在地上。好。 Just her own plate on the floor. Good.
但是我们吃的东西是一样的。比如我吃猪排，她就吃猪排。 But we eat the same things. Like if I have a pork chop, she has a pork chop.
如果我有小牛肉，她也有小牛肉。 If I have a veal, she has a veal.
格伦，听我的。 Glenn, take my advice.
别再和女人鬼混了。去干正事吧。 Stop hangin' around with the pussy. Go find some.
我在听，迈克尔。有什么事吗? I'm listening, Michael. What's up?
是啊，我听到你那匹萨店的小广告了。 Yeah, I heard your little advertisement there for the pizza place.
耶利哥披萨。我喜欢那个披萨。你不喜欢吗? Yeah, Jericho's Pizza. I love that pizza. Don't you like it?
听起来你很喜欢。我喜欢杰里科的披萨。 You sound like you'd love it. I enjoy Jericho's Pizza.
我今晚想对你说的是，尚普兰先生… What I wanted to say to you tonight, Mr. Champlaign, was...
我对这地方很感兴趣，至少是我的一些朋友 I have an interest in this place, or at least, some friends of mine--
比利，如果难的话，就用一个音节吧。哦,迈克尔。 Just use one-syllables, Billy, if it's difficult. Oh, Michael.
嘿，聪明的家伙。只用一个音节—— Hey, smart guy. Just use one-syllable--
聪明的人吗?我们很聪明。 Smart guy? We're being-- Smart guy.
今晚我们有个知情人。 We got somebody with a little lip on us tonight.
嘿。别叫我"嘿"。" Hey. Don't call me "Hey."
这不是谈话。这是独白。我说，你听。 This is not a conversation. This is a monologue. I talk, you listen.
理解我吗?哦，是的，我们在听。 Understand me? Oh, yeah, we're listening.
是吗?去做吧。 Yes? Go ahead.
我不希望你再评论披萨店了。 I don't want you makin' any more comments about the pizza joint.
你有亲戚管理这里吗?人们要靠这个赚钱。 Do you have relatives that run the place? People gotta make money on this.
维尼叔叔还是其他人?有些人—— Uncle Vinnie or someone? There are people--
你知道吗，迈克尔?你是个肉丸子。 You know what, Michael? You're a meatball.
-高地公园的黛比 -我叫黛比。 - Debbie in Highland Park. - My name is Debbie.
你好,黛比。你多大了? Hello, Debbie. How old are you?
我23岁。啊哈。 I'm 23. Uh-huh.
你是做什么的?我什么都不做。 What do you do? I don't do anything.
你上次做事是什么时候? When was the last time you did something?
我不知道。大约一个月前。 I don't know. A bout a month ago.
你一个月前做了什么?我去游泳了! What'd you do a month ago? I went swimmin'!
嗯哼。你是靠什么赚钱? Mm-hmm. What do you do for money?
我靠我弟弟。我还没有做过。 I got my brother. I haven't made any.
黛比，你是个吸血鬼。 Debbie, you're a leech.
你不觉得是时候放下你的无聊，开始赚钱了吗? Don't you think it's time you got off your duff, started making money?
其实不是。我得到了我想要的一切。 Well, not really. I got everything I want.
但是，黛比，你需要什么?嗯—— But, Debbie, what do you need? Well--
你错过了什么你需要的东西?一个男人。一个男朋友。 What are you missing that you need? A guy. A boyfriend.
一个男人吗?你能给男人什么? A guy? What do you have to offer a guy?
嗯—— Well--
我有一头漂亮闪亮的长发 I have nice, shiny long hair--
一个人可以给自己买一顶假发。 A guy could buy himself a wig.
你能看出来我没戴假发。它从不脱落。 You can tell I don't have a wig. It never falls off.
你太棒了，亲爱的。但说真的，黛比。 You're terrific, darling. But seriously, Debbie.
在生活中，除了寻找一顿免费的饭，你就没有别的追求吗? Aren't you shooting for anything more in life than looking for a free meal?
不尽然。 Not really.
你想躺着直到有人来照顾你。 You wanna lie around till you find somebody to take care of you.
是的。你很有活力，亲爱的。 Yeah. You're dynamic, darling.
加兰德的朗达来电。朗达，你在《夜话》节目。 Rhonda from Garland on the line. Rhonda, you're on Night Talk.
巴瑞，我想表达一下我的观点 Barry, I want to express my views--
你在做什么，史蒂夫?看看这个叫迪茨的家伙。 What are you doing, Steve? Looking at this Dietz guy.
…在纽约给吸毒的人分发针头 ...up in New York City, givin' out needles to drug addicts.
他们必须这样做才能阻止艾滋病。清洁的针头有帮助。 They have to do it to stop AIDS. Clean needles help.
这对这个国家的人来说是不道德的 It's immoral for the government of this country--
纳税人的钱都给瘾君子了。 tax dollars to be goin' to addicts.
但对于我们缴纳的40亿税金来说， But it's all right for our tax dollars, four billion of them,
进入一个系统。完全是个笑话。 to go into a system that's a complete joke.
流入这个国家的毒品比以往任何时候都多。 More drugs than ever are coming into this country.
我们的法庭，我们的监狱都塞满了案件。 Our courts, our jails are clogged with cases.
那天晚上在纽约，毒贩子又杀了一名警察。 The other night up in New York City, crack dealers killed another cop.
任何想要刺激的孩子都能得到。这是正确的。 Any kid who wants a hit can get one. That's right.
我们什么时候能醒过来，朗达? When are we gonna wake up, Rhonda?
我们什么时候才能承认毒品禁令在这个国家不起作用? When are we going to admit that drug prohibition is not working in this country?
我觉得，知道我怎么想吗? I think-- Know what I think?
我认为我们应该让所有毒品合法化，尽管这听起来很邪恶。 I think we should legalize all drugs, as sinister as that sounds.
这是我听过的最蠢的话。是吗? That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Is it?
瘾君子可以去药店，更多的东西，劳拉。 A junkie could go to a drugstore, More stuff, Laura.
签上他的名字，花一块钱就能买到东西…… sign his name, get the stuff for a buck...
这样他就不用为了自己的嗜好去抢劫或杀人了。谢谢你,艾伦。 then he doesn't have to rob or kill for his habit. Thanks, Ellen.
你不能让孩子吸毒。 You cannot let children have drugs.
为什么不呢?反正他们也会拿到的。为什么不呢? Why not? They're gonna get it anyway. Why not?
在今天的美国，我们谈论的是八年级的枪击事件。 In America today we're talking about shooting up in the eighth grade.
我们对孩子们负有道义上的义务。 We have a moral obligation to the children.
知道最危险的药物是什么吗? Know what the most dangerous drug is?
是海洛因。不，这是合法的。 It's heroin. No, it's legal.
是烟草。每年有35万人死于该病。 It's tobacco. It kills 350,000 people a year.
你知道每年有多少可卡因，快克，海洛因和大麻致死吗? You know how much coke, crack, heroin, pot kill every year?
四千人。你会听从理智吗?喂?让我查一下。 Four thousand people. Will you listen to sense? Hello? Let me check.
请你听我讲道理好吗? Will you listen to logic, please?
唯一从禁酒令中受益的人… The only people who benefit from prohibition...
是靠它赚钱的黑帮 are the gangsters makin' the money on it,
政客们谴责它，并得到你的投票。 the politicians condemning it and gettin' your vote.
谁来买单?你，朗达·Q，笨蛋! And who foots the bill? You, Rhonda Q. Sucker!
请再说一遍!明天就结束了。 I beg your pardon! It would end tomorrow.
这个国家2000亿美元的毒品问题可能会在一夜之间消失。 The $200 billion drug problem in this country could disappear overnight.
让这些该死的东西合法化。今天就做，就在这条消息之后。 Legalize the damn stuff. Do it today, right after this message.
我是巴瑞·尚普拉。这里是《夜话》。 I'm Barry Champlaign. This is Night Talk.
我们要去听一段留言。我打完针就回来。 We're gonna go to a message. I'll be right back after I shoot up.
谁是笨蛋? Who's the schlub?
巴瑞，丹和我想在节目开始前告诉你我们有个好消息。 Barry, Dan and I wanted to tell you before the show we have some good news.
巴瑞吗?丹，我现在不方便说话。我要尿尿。 Barry? Dan, I can't talk right now. I gotta take a leak.
我回头再找你，好吗? I'll catch you later, okay?
斯图，别再想棒球比赛和异装癖了。线路怎么样了? Stu, cool it with the baseball calls and the transvestites. How's the lines?
我已经有五个了。给我45个。 I got five hanging on already. Give me 45.
你说对了。巴瑞，这位是恰克·迪茨， You got it. Barry, I'd like you to meet Chuck Dietz,
芝加哥都市波公司负责广告的副总裁。 V.P. in charge of advertising, MetroWave, Chicago.
真的吗?很高兴见到你。我的荣幸。 Really? Very nice to meet you. It's my pleasure.
我看了你所有的剪报… I've been reading all your press clippings...
几周都在听你节目的录音带。 and listening to tapes of your shows for weeks.
- 为了? -你真的很了不起。 - And? - And you're really something.
你很有趣。我试着逗乐。 You're very funny. I try to amuse.
我正在上节目。我得继续了。天才在工作。 I'm in the middle of a show. I've gotta move it along. Genius at work.
都市广播周一开始播报节目，并将其与全国同步。 MetroWave's picking up the show starting Monday, linking it to a national feed.
汉弗莱咖啡的一些人想在全国范围内赞助这个节目。 Some people at Humphrey's Coffee want to sponsor the show nationally.
温度是30，巴仔。 We're at cold:30, Bar.
等一下。这个节目从周一晚上开始在全国播出? Wait a minute. The show's going national starting Monday night?
什么时候发生的? When did this happen?
-难道我没有发言权吗?你知道这件事吗?-是的。 - Don't I get a say in this? You know about this? - Yeah.
丹——我们直到今晚才知道。 Dan-- We didn't know anything about it until tonight.
没成功之前没必要让你们这么兴奋。 No sense getting you all excited until it panned out.
可以说，恰克是来当都市广播的耳目的。 Chuck is here to be the eyes and ears of MetroWave, so to speak.
-可以这么说。- 15，巴仔。 - So to speak. - Fifteen, Bar.
你去吧。我们可以晚点再谈。 Why don't you go ahead. We can talk later.
我们的节目很火。我们说的是拉里·金，从东海岸到西海岸。 We got a hot show. We're talking Larry King here-- coast to coast.
丹，节目总是很火。斯图，给我找根导管。 It's always a hot show, Dan. Stu, find me a catheter.
额外的火。我们会签六个月的合同。遵命。 Extra hot. We'll get a contract for six months. Jawohl.
你正在听德州最好的谈话节目。 You're listening to the best talk in Texas.
Barry Champlaign在KGAB报道。你知道这件事吗? Barry Champlaign on KGAB. You know about this?
是的。冷静点，好吗，巴瑞?这些钱不值钱。袖手旁观。 Yeah. Chill, will you, Barry? The bucks don't suck. Stand by.
555 -说话。哟。 555-TALK. Yo.
都市波广播公司是一家大型媒体公司… MetroWave Broadcasting is a giant media corporation...
专门从事电台广播。 specializing in broadcast radio.
在美国和加拿大…… It has 357 affiliate stations...
它有357个附属电台。 in the United States and Canada.
两分钟前我接到一个电话… Two minutes ago I received a phone call...
来自一个控制着357个电台的人 from the man who controls those 357 stations--
都市波广播公司的总裁。 the president of MetroWave Broadcasting.
他问我都市波能不能接这个节目， He asked me if MetroWave could pick up this show,
接巴瑞·尚普拉去国家辛迪加，周一晚上开始。 pick up Barry Champlaign for national syndication, beginning Monday night.
我以前也收到过这样的邀请 I've had these offers before,
过去有人问过我是否能让我的作风更柔和， and I've been asked in the past if I could ever soften my touch,
简单点说，我的答案一直都是一样的: go a little easier, and my answer has always been the same:
要么接受，要么放弃。 Take it or leave it.
他接受了。 He took it.
所以，从周一晚上开始， And so, beginning Monday night,
这个节目《夜话》开始在全国播出。 this show, Night Talk, begins national broadcasting.
这意味着整个国家都在倾听。 That means the nation is listening.
你最好有话要说。我知道我有。 You better have something to say. I know I do.
梅斯基特的切特在线上。 And we have Chet from Mesquite on the line.
你好,切特。喂? Hello, Chet. Hello?
你以为你很聪明。喂? You think you're so smart. Hello?
你为什么总是说毒品和黑鬼… Why are you always talkin' about the drugs and niggers...
同性恋和犹太人? and homos and Jews?
没有别的事可谈了吗?你知道我讨厌什么吗? Isn't there anything else to talk about? You know what I hate?
我讨厌那些告诉我他们不想谈的事情的人。 I hate people who tell me what they don't wanna talk about.
你不想谈论黑人和同性恋，为什么要提起他们? You don't wanna talk about blacks and gays, why'd you bring them up?
听起来你很喜欢谈论他们。 Sounds like you like talking about them.
告诉我你想谈什么，否则就挂电话。 Tell me what you wanna talk about, or get off the phone.
你为什么不说实话呢?关于什么? Why don't you start telling the truth? About what?
你知道的。你节目背后的人，为你买单的人。 You know. People behind your show, people who pay the bills.
现在说到赞助商。别在我面前装傻。 Talking about the sponsors now. Don't you act dumb with me.
尚普拉是个什么名字? What kind of a name is Champlaign?
我想让你取消我今晚订的机票。你改了? I want you to cancel my plane reservations for tonight. You changed it?
我明天再来。也许是因为这听起来太犹太了。 I'm gonna come in tomorrow. Maybe because it sounded too Jewish.
叫弗雷迪。告诉他明天给我打电话。改名字，做鼻子整形， Call Freddie. Tell him to call me tomorrow. Change the name, get a nose job,
老一套。切特，快点! same old story. Chet, come on!
他开始时有点发抖。你的态度让我想起了一个故事。 He started out a bit shaky. Your attitude reminds me of a story.
去年夏天我去了德国。 Last summer I visited Germany.
想看看希特勒的故土。 Wanted to take a look at Hitler's homeland.
你熟悉阿道夫·希特勒吗，切特? Are you familiar with Adolf Hitler, Chet?
我很熟悉阿道夫·希特勒。 I'm familiar with Adolf Hitler.
我打赌你是。 I bet you are.
我决定去参观慕尼黑郊区的集中营遗址: I decided to visit the remains of a concentration camp on the outskirts of Munich:
达豪集中营。 Dachau.
你参加一个旅行团，乘公共汽车出去，从大门出来。会不寒而栗。 You join a tour group, go out by bus, get out at the gate. It's chilling.
大门上有个牌子写着“劳动自由”。 A sign over the gate says, "Arbeit Macht Frei."
它的意思是，“工作会让你自由”——这是纳粹对他们的囚犯说的话。 It means, "Work will make you free"-- something the Nazis told their prisoners.
你还在听吗，切特?我在数你的谎言。 You still listening to me, Chet? I'm counting your lies.
很好。我想确保你听到了。 Good. I wanna make sure you're hearing them.
我在集中营里走着，我看到地上有东西。 I'm walking around this concentration camp, and I see something on the ground.
我把它捡起来。猜猜我发现了什么，切特? I picked it up. Guess what I found, Chet?
一个小小的大卫之星。很旧。 A tiny Star of David. Very old.
谁知道呢?可能是集中营里某个囚犯的。 Who knows? It might've belonged to one of the prisoners at the camp.
也许是一个从父母身边被夺走的小男孩…… Maybe a small boy torn from his parents...
当他们被拖去屠宰场的时候。 as they were dragged off to the slaughterhouse.
我保留了那颗大卫之星。 I kept that Star of David.
我知道我不该这么做，但我做了。我把它放在我的控制台上。 I know I shouldn't have, but I did. I keep it right here on my console.
有时我喜欢拿着它。 I like to hold it sometimes.
事实上，嗯……我现在正拿着它。 In fact, well... I'm holding it right now.
我喜欢把它握在手里，给我勇气。 I like to hold it in my hand to give me courage.
也许是那个小男孩面对无法形容的邪恶时所拥有的一些勇气…… Maybe some of the courage that small boy had as he faced unspeakable evil...
可以进入我的内心，当我面对自己生活中的考验时…… can enter me as I face the trials in my own life...
就像我面对懦弱和心胸狭窄的人。 as I face the cowardly and the narrow-minded.
那些躲在匿名电话后面的刻薄、偏执的人…… The bitter, bigoted people who hide behind anonymous phone calls...
充满仇恨和毒胆汁。 full of hatred and poisonous bile.
没有勇气，没有骨气的人…… The gutless, spineless people...
比如你，切特，让我恶心! like you, Chet, who make me puke!
继续说，犹太小子。人生苦短。 Keep talkin', Jew boy. Life is short.
斯图，给切特送个微波炉吧。 Stu, let's send a microwave oven out to Chet.
肯特打来了电话。是的,肯特? And we have Kent on the line. Yeah, Kent?
-我需要帮助。-说。 -I need help. -Shoot.
我喜欢和我的女朋友聚会。 I like to party with my girlfriend.
-你多大了? -19岁。 How old are you? Nineteen.
-你女朋友多大了? -17岁。 How old's your girlfriend? Seventeen.
好的，请讲。所以我们喜欢派对，你知道吗? Okay, go ahead. So we like to party, you know?
当你开派对的时候，你的父母在哪里?在度假。 When you're partying, where are your parents? On a vacation.
他对此很兴奋。看看他。 He's so excited about it. Look at him.
我想是斐济。对吗? I think it's Fiji. Is that right?
有一个地方叫斐济吗?原谅我。我要去处理一些事情。 Is there a place called Fiji? Excuse me. I'm gonna take care of some stuff.
你的父母在一个叫斐济的地方度假，而你在聚会。 Your parents are on vacation in a place called Fiji, and you're partying.
是的，这正是我想问你的，巴仔。 Yeah, that's what I wanted to ask you about, Bar.
我们已经开了几天派对了。啊哈。 See, we've been partying for a couple of days. Uh-huh.
吸食可卡因，可卡因。 Smokin' coke, crack.
游离碱。 Free-base.
听起来很肮脏，肯特。你和你女朋友一直在吸毒。 Sounds pretty sordid, Kent. You've been smoking crack with your girlfriend.
你还在忙什么?喝下去。” What else you been up to? Drinkin'.
嗯哼。我不知道。 Mm-hmm. I don't know.
我昨天喝了一瓶烈性威士忌因为我有点疑神疑鬼。 I drank a bottle of 100-proof whiskey yesterday 'cause I was gettin' paranoid.
吉尔在嗑迷幻药吃安定。 Jill was doin' some acid with some Valium.
这是—— It was--
肯特，你得找个医生，洗胃。 Kent, you need to call a doctor, have your stomach pumped.
我给你一个电话号码。所以我才打电话给你。 Let me give you a number to call. That's why I'm callin' you.
为什么?吉尔。 Why? It's Jill.
-她睡了很久了 -不，不，不。 She's been sleepin' a long time-- No, no, no.
她一直在睡觉，不会醒了。 She's been sleepin' and she won't wake up.
别跟我胡扯了。你戒毒出来后，给我打电话。 Don't waste my time with this baloney. When you get outta detox, give me a call.
她脸色变蓝了。她脸色变蓝了? She's turnin' blue. She's turning blue?
太好了。把你的地址告诉斯图，我们马上派救护车过去。 Great. Just give Stu your address and we'll send an ambulance there now.
把你的地址给斯图，我们两分钟内派救护车过去。 Give Stu your address, we'll send an ambulance in two minutes.
我不能!我不能!我要你的地址。肯特,你好吗? I can't! I can't! I'm gonna get your address. Kent, hello?
喂? Hello?
我真的很高兴肯特这样的人在外面，而我在里面。 I'm really glad people like Kent are out there and I'm inside here.
现在我们来做个小广告。 We're gonna go to a little commercial break now.
哇哦!杰里科披萨店，在111号公路的杰里科收费公路。 Whoo-whee! Jericho's Pizza, down Route 111 at the Jericho Turnpike.
他们有你永远不会忘记的披萨。一片，你一周都不用吃。 They got pizza you'll never forget. One slice, you don't have to eat for a week.
我看到一个人用盘子里的东西梳头。耶利哥的披萨。 I saw a guy in there combing his hair with his stuff off the plate. Jericho's Pizza.
接下来是新闻和天气预报，稍后我们会为您带来更多的《夜话》节目。 We have the news and weather coming up, then we'll be back with more Night Talk.
这是你的邮件。你读它。 Here's your mail. You read it.
今晚有什么问题吗?和老太太打架? What's the problem tonight? Fight with the old lady?
不，没有问题。给我出了不少难题。 No, there's no problems. Throwing me some real curveballs.
曲线球怎么了，巴仔?一些电话。 What's wrong with curveballs, Bar? Some call.
这是个骗局。你怎么能确定? It's a hoax. How can you be sure?
一场恶作剧。斯图，亨利是谁?你没给我这个。 A hoax. Stu, who's this Henry? You didn't give me this.
谁是沃斯堡的丹尼斯?我没听懂。 Who's Denise from Fort Worth? I didn't get that.
-也许应该让劳拉接电话。-这些人都是硬汉。 - Maybe Laura should take the calls. - These people were stiffs.
你要硬的，我就给你硬的。不,斯图。 You want stiffs, I'll give you stiffs. No, Stu.
我不要硬的。我说的是英语吗?仔细听我说。 I don't want stiffs. Am I speaking English? Read my lips.
让节目继续，给我点有用的东西。 Keep the show moving, give me stuff I can work with.
你听不懂我的话吗?不，我没有问题。 You having trouble understanding me? No, I'm not having trouble.
事实上，我听得很清楚。 As a matter of fact, I read you loud and clear.
好! Good!
巴瑞吗? Barry?
巴瑞。 Barry.
亲爱的，放轻松。一切都在掌握之中。 Honey, just relax. Everything's under control.
这是我的事，不是你的。 It's my ass on the line, not yours.
你要做的就是对人友善。 All you have to do is just be nice.
好吧?就今晚。 Okay? Just for tonight.
你对我好一点，劳拉。这是你擅长的。 You be nice, Laura. It's what you're good at.
就算有15。你也不会输 You're not gonna lose even with a 15--
杰瑞，你先等一下。怎么了，巴瑞? Jerry, I'm gonna put you on hold. Something wrong, Barry?
他紧盯着我，我没法工作。我要他马上出来! I can't work with him breathing down my neck. I want him out now!
我这里有你的合同。你为什么不拿过来看看呢? I have your contract right here. Why don't you take it and look it over.
你在那之前的周五甩给我。 You dump it on me the Friday before it's gonna happen.
你把一个笨蛋塞进我的工作室。 You stick some putz in the middle of my studio.
我觉得我是在为自己的工作试镜! I feel like I'm auditioning for my own job!
巴瑞，冷静点。你不在乎。 Barry, calm down. You don't care.
把我关在那里，看情况如何。 Just stick me out there, see how it goes.
不管用，把巴瑞冲进马桶，对吧? Doesn't work out, flush Barry down the toilet, right?
你别想让我为你在国家电台上的位置道歉。 You're not gonna get me to apologize for getting you a slot on national radio.
我为这笔交易付出了很大努力，我很满意。 I worked very hard on this deal, and I'm happy with it.
如果你不同意，我们就撕毁合同， If you're not, we tear up the contract,
我们不搞都市波的勾搭。 we don't do the MetroWave hookup.
大错特错，伙计。我认为这个赌注是值得的，因为我认为这剧很好。 Big mistake, guy. I think it's worth the gamble because I think the show is good.
巴瑞，你很棒。它会把它们吹到任何地方。 Barry, you are good. And it will blow them away everywhere it's heard.
迪茨同意了。笑着忍受吧。 Dietz goes with the deal. Grin and bear it.
你做你的，我做我的。 You do your job, I'll do mine.
你在新闻之前查过萨尼·克林吗? Did you run Sani Clean before the news?
是的，我去了。日志准备好了吗? Yes, I did. You up with your log?
有哈利，费尔斯通，还有标志。他们都在正轨上。 There's a Harry's, a Firestone, a logo. They're all on track.
很好。别让这件事影响到你。这是一个奇怪的夜晚。 Good. Don't let it get to you. It's been a strange night.
这没什么奇怪的。你在这里工作多久了? There's nothing strange about it. How long you been working here?
四个月。你和他上床多久了? Four months. How long you been sleeping with him?
听着,艾伦。我是想让你高兴起来。 Listen, Ellen. I was gonna cheer you up.
都市波电视网将接手这剧。我们要走向全国。 MetroWave, the network, is picking up the show. We're going national.
我的天啊。芝加哥也是吗?是的，在芝加哥也是。 Oh, my God. In Chicago too? Yeah, in Chicago too.
事情没那么简单——你一定很兴奋! It's not that simple-- You must be so excited!
是的，我当然很兴奋。 Yeah, of course I'm excited.
我们从公司那里得到了一个监视我的角色。 We got this character here from the company keeping an eye on me.
我马上挂电话。艾伦，你能告诉他你在跟我说话吗? I'll be right off the phone. Ellen, will you tell him you're talking to me?
我喜欢这种东西。像今晚这样的夜晚才是真正的意义所在。 I like this stuff. Nights like tonight are what it's all about.
你要么习惯，要么迷失。 You either get used to it or you get lost.
他妻子就是这么做的，离开了他。在你之前的两位制片人也是。 That's what his wife did-- left him. So did the two producers who were here before you.
但是大斯图留下来了，不是吗? But big Stu stayed, didn't he?
我没必要为他受罪。我不是他妻子。你不是，但我是。 I don't have to take his shit. I'm not his wife. You're not, but I am.
现在不是我说话的时候。 This is not the best time for me to talk.
是的,是的。很抱歉这么晚给你打电话。 Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry I'm calling so late.
-只是这很重要。-巴瑞，20! - It's just that This is important. - Barry, 20!
我需要你的帮助。我从没向你要过什么 I need your help with something. I never ask you for anything and--
巴瑞, Barry--
你周末能来达拉斯吗，一直到周二? Can you come to Dallas over the weekend, till Tuesday?
什么?我需要一个我信得过的人。这—— What? I need someone here I can trust. It's--
-这很重要。-该死!来吧! - It's important. - Damn it! Come on!
我觉得他不会让我这么做的。算了吧。 I don't think he's gonna let me. Forget it.
算了吧。别来了。 Forget it. Don't come.
他回答说:“他没回家的那天晚上。” He answered, "The night he didn't come home."
-不，这种事经常发生。——艾伦? - No, that happened all the time. - Ellen?
我在想，好吗? I'm thinking, okay?
5、巴仔。 Five, Bar.
好吧。周日吗?你去机场接我。系好安全带，巴仔。 All right. Sunday? You pick me up at the airport. Strap in, Bar.
好的，我会去的。开始吧。 Yeah, I'll be there. Here we go.
-我得走了再见。-你正在听德州最好的谈话节目。 - Look, I gotta go. Bye. - You're listening to the best talk in Texas.
热线已经开通，现在欢迎您的来电… The phone lines are open, and your calls are invited now...
在555 -说话。 at 555-TALK.
鲍勃，真是松了口气。今晚过得怎么样? Bob, what a relief. How you doing tonight?
棒极了。很好，谢谢。 Terrific. Very well, thank you.
我希望你不会忙到没时间接我电话。 I hope you're not gonna get too busy to take my calls.
没有你的电话，节目就不完整。腿怎么样了? No show is complete without your call. How are the legs?
他们没事，只是有点疼。但你知道我说什么吗? They're fine-- an ache or two. But you know what I say?
当他们给你柠檬时，就做柠檬水。 When they give you lemons, make lemonade.
覆水难收。哭，你一个人哭。 You can't cry over spilled milk. Cry, and you cry alone.
你不能失去你从未拥有过的东西。 You can't lose what you never had.
因为只有失去了才知道拥有了什么。 Because you don't know what you got until you lost it.
所以不要失去希望。这一切都会过去的。 So don't lose hope. This too shall pass.
因为今天是你余生的第一天。 Because today is the first day of the rest of your life.
是啊，黎明前总是最黑暗的。鲍勃，我能不能 Yeah, and it's always darkest before dawn. Bob, could I just--
人们认为坐在轮椅上的生活一定是世界上最糟糕的事情。 People think that life in a wheelchair must be the worst thing in the world.
我不是这么看的。 That's not the way I look at it.
我想世界上最糟糕的事情就是…… I imagine the worst thing in the world would be...
对每天发生在我们身上的美好事物不领情。 bein' unthankful for all the good things that come our way every day.
孩子们的微笑，花儿盛开， The smiles on little children, flowers bloomin',
在一个明媚的春日，小鸟们坐在嫩芽上啾啾。 little birds chirpin', sittin' on the buddin' branches on a bright spring day.
为什么，天哪，每天太阳升起就是个奇迹。 Why, hell, just the sun comin' up every day is a miracle.
我完全同意你的观点，尤其是关于太阳的那部分。 I couldn't agree with you more, especially that part about the sun.
我们陷入日常的烦恼中，忘记了简单的事情。 We get bogged down in our daily troubles and we forget about the simple things.
哦，我忘了还有一件值得感谢的事。 Oh, I forgot one more thing to be thankful for.
那是什么?巴瑞·尚普拉的节目。 What's that? The Barry Champlaign show.
谢谢你，鲍勃。听着，我们得走了。 Thank you, Bob. Listen, we gotta run.
你知道你不行，但我们可以。上帝保佑你还有一件事。 Know you can't, but we can. So God bless you-- One more thing.
不要把所有的鸡蛋放在一个篮子里。一只鸟在手里—— Don't put all your eggs in one basket. A bird in the hand--
-晚安。我们有-黛比，你还在吗? - Good night. And we have-- - Debbie, you still there?
-把收音机音量关小。停止哭泣。-我是黑人。 - Turn your radio down. Stop crying. - Well, I'm black.
对你有好处。你想要什么?一枚奖章? Good for you. What do you want? A medal?
嗯，不，我不知道。别像其他人那样玩弄我。 Well, no, I don't. Don't play with me like them other people.
我想让你知道… I want you to know...
我喜欢听你们的节目，我想说，我喜欢你们犹太人。 that I enjoy listening to your show, and I want to say, I like you Jews.
我喜欢你们黑人。我认为每个人都应该拥有一台。 Well, I like you blacks. I think everyone should own one.
我想说的是， What I mean to say is,
啊哈。我有很多朋友是犹太人。 Uh-huh. I have many friends who are Jewish.
真的吗?有多少?嗯，三四个。 Really? How many? Well, three or four.
我不认为那是“很多”。他们都是很好的人。 I wouldn't call that "many." They're very nice people.
他们受过良好的教育，擅长做生意。 They're educated and they're good in business.
约翰，我不知道该怎么跟你说，但你永远进不了布奈布里斯。 John, I don't know how to break this to you, but you'll never get in the B'nai B'rith.
你是黑色的。你不知道犹太人对黑人的看法吗? You're black. Don't you know how Jews feel about blacks?
他们恨你!他们在街上看到你们这些黑鬼，就会去另一边。 They hate you! They see you schwartzes on the street, they cross to the other side.
你知道达拉斯南部的那些贫民窟吗老鼠把婴儿当早餐吃? You know those slums in south Dallas where the rats eat babies for breakfast?
犹太人拥有那些贫民窟!你说我爱犹太人是什么意思?你是汤姆叔叔吗? Jews own those slums! What do you mean, I love Jews? Are you some kind of Uncle Tom?
你对汤姆叔叔了解多少?我认为兄弟情谊—— What the hell you know about Uncle Tom? I think brotherhood--
我不在乎你怎么想!没人知道! I don't care what you think! No one does!
你想知道为什么吗?因为你想拍主人的马屁。 You wanna know why? Because you're trying to kiss the master's butt.
什么?你给我打电话，试着深说你有多爱犹太人。 What? You call me up, try to get deep on how much you love Jews.
你就是在说谎。你讨厌他们。你恨我! You're lying. You hate them. You hate me!
我不拍任何人的马屁!你当然知道!你去死吧。 I don't kiss nobody's butt! Sure you do! You kiss my butt.
你现在是在拍我马屁。如果你不是，你早就挂我电话了。 You're kissing my butt right now. If you weren't, you'd hang up on me.
我不想挂你电话!那我就帮你个忙。 I don't wanna hang up on you! Then I'll do you the favor.
晚上说话。黛比，该你了。 Night Talk. Debbie, you're on.
巴瑞吗?嗯哼。 Barry? Mm-hmm.
我是黛比。 This is Debbie again.
哦,黛比。正确的。 Oh, Debbie. Right.
长发的她，我的僵尸女王，我的幻想。 She of the long hair, my zombie queen, my fantasy.
你好吗，我的宝贝? 糟糕。 How are you, my belle? Bad.
我一直在想你说的话。 I've been thinkin' about what you said.
-我想问你点事 -好的? - I wanna ask you somethin'. - Yeah?
-我怎么了? -什么? -What's wrong with me? -What?
切特回来了。你已经让黛比上过两次了。我觉得你不该接这个电话。 Chet's back. You've had Debbie on twice. I don't think you should take the call.
-巴瑞? -我能应付。直接交给我。 -Barry? -I can handle it. Just shoot it to me.
这太重要了。我今晚可不会因为这事就跳个没完 This is too important. I'm not gonna jump through hoops tonight just because of this--
求你了，让他戴上。 Please, tell him to put it on.
黛比，你真该看看我现在的状况。 Yeah, Debbie, look, you should see the shape I'm in.
我是说，一个好的整形医生或者一杯氰化物都能解决问题。 I mean, nothing a good plastic surgeon or a glass of cyanide wouldn't fix.
我是说，你还年轻。你的人生还有很长的路要走。 I mean, you're young. You got your whole life ahead of you.
为什么我哪里都不去? Why don't I go anywhere?
你得先站起来。 Well, you gotta stand up first.
我是说，千里之行始于足下。 I mean, every journey begins with a single step.
你得试试，小南瓜。 You gotta go for it, pumpkin.
我和琳达以前交往过，但她搬去休斯顿了。 Me and Linda used to go out, but she moved to Houston.
是的——哈!听着，黛比，黛比。 Yeah-- Heh! Listen, Debbie, Debbie.
你有两条胳膊两条腿?是的。 You got two arms and two legs? Yeah.
你瞎了吗?不。 Are you blind? No.
-你有肚脐? -是的。 - You got a belly button? - Yeah.
两个肚脐?不，我有一个。 Two belly buttons? No, I got one.
你确定吗?你最近看了吗? Are you sure? Have you looked lately?
是的。我有一个。你会没事的。 Yeah. I got one. You're gonna be fine.
你会没事的。 You're gonna be just fine.
我们有…梅斯基特的切特在线上。切特吗? And we have... Chet from Mesquite on the line. Chet?
现在全国的人都能听到你的大嘴巴了。 So now everyone in the country can hear your big mouth flap.
切特，很高兴又接到你的电话。 Chet, so nice to hear from you again.
你不是应该去烧十字架或者调戏孩子吗? Shouldn't you be out burning crosses or molesting children?
我更想和你谈谈。训练比特犬怎么样? I'd rather be talking to you. How about training pit bulls?
我觉得你很聪明。 Think you're so smart.
你收到我寄到局里的包裹了吗? You get the package I sent down to the station?
包吗? Package?
你懂的，我知道。你送我礼物了? You got it, I know you did. You sent me a present?
我无法决定是否使用计时器。 I couldn't decide whether to use a timer or not.
当你打开它的时候你会发现的。 You'll have to find that out when you open it.
你是说你给我寄了个炸弹? You're telling me you sent me a bomb in the mail?
用棕色纸包着。我知道你现在正看着它。 Wrapped in brown paper. I know you're lookin' at it right now.
你只要取一些C-4， You just take some C-4,
把它卷在一堆螺母、螺栓和鹅卵石里，它就能起作用了。 roll it in a pile of nuts and bolts and pebbles, and it does the job.
-听起来很有趣，切特。-我没有收到你的包裹。 - Sounds interesting, Chet. - I didn't receive your package.
你确定寄对地址了吗?你说对了。 Sure you sent it to the right address? You got it.
如果我是你，我会让我漂亮的助理打电话给警察。 If I were you, I'd have my pretty assistant give the police a call.
拆弹小组要花十分钟才能到那里。 Take the bomb squad ten minutes to get there.
我为什么要叫拆弹小组，切特? Why should I call the bomb squad, Chet?
就因为某个乡巴佬告诉我邮件里有炸弹吗? Because some pinheaded redneck moron tells me there's a bomb in my mail?
谁笑到最后—— He who laughs last--
闭嘴! Shut up!
晚上说话。丹尼斯，轮到你了。 Night Talk. Denise, you're on.
我很害怕，巴瑞。你在害怕什么，宝贝? I'm scared, Barry. What are you scared of, babe?
没什么特别的，但另一方面… Nothin' specifically, but on the other hand...
就好像无论我去哪里 it's like everywhere I go--
嗯哼。是吗? Mm-hmm. Yeah?
巴瑞，你知道，我们有… Barry, you know, we've got...
厨房水槽里的垃圾处理机。是的，很好。 a garbage disposal in our kitchen sink. Yeah, it's fine.
告诉丹我的邮件是我的事。 Tell Dan my mail is my business.
这一点都不好笑。你告诉丹我的邮件是我的事。 This is not funny. You tell Dan my mail is my business.
你知道那是什么感觉，当你不得不伸手去摸那个日本… You know how that feels when you have to reach down there into that gook...
用你的手环绕? and put your hand around?
谁知道下面会有什么? Who knows what could be down there?
丹，我希望你不是在报警。如果是的话，我会很生气的。 Dan, I hope you're not calling the cops. If you are, I'm gonna get really pissed off.
把电话挂了，不然我就走。 Get off the phone or I walk.
有些细菌你甚至看不见。别浪费我的时间，伙计。 There's germs you can't even see. Don't waste my time, man.
挂了，不然我就走!他们生长在那里。 Hang it or I walk! They grow there.
挂了!他们回到管道。 Hang it up! They come back up the pipes.
沙门氏菌，酵母菌，癌症，甚至普通感冒。谁知道呢? Salmonella, yeast, cancer, even the common cold. Who knows?
但是，巴瑞，即使没有这些，如果 But, Barry, even without all of that, what if--
我只是说如果 and I'm just sayin' what if--
如果你的手在下面的时候发生了爆炸呢? what if that disposal came on while your hand was down there?
然后周而复始，丹尼斯，告诉我。 And it goes around and around-- Denise, tell me something.
你是说你害怕你妈妈厨房里的垃圾处理机吗? You're telling me that you're afraid of the garbage disposal in your mother's kitchen?
不只是垃圾处理机。 Well, it's not just the garbage disposal.
我喜欢干净的东西，巴瑞。 I like things to be clean, Barry.
这种情况多久发生一次? How often does this happen?
我来这里之后去过几次。 Couple times since I've been here.
就像我们这条街上的房子。以前我们知道谁住在我们这条街上。 Like the houses on our street. Used to be we knew who lived on our street.
但那是几年前的事了。现在各种各样的人都住在这里 But that was years ago. Now all different kinds of people live here--
外国人，有口音的人。 foreigners, people with accents.
它们卫生吗?你为什么不问问他们? Are they sanitary? Why don't you ask one of them?
去别人家是个不错的主意… That would be a nice idea to just go to somebody's house...
敲他们的门， and knock on their door,
但如果那里住着连环杀人犯呢? but what if a serial murderer lived there?
如果泰德·邦迪住在那里呢? What if Ted Bundy lived there?
如果他坐在里面看电视，我走到门口怎么办? What if he was sittin' inside watchin' television, and I came to the door?
“怎么，你就直接进来吧，丹尼斯，”他会说。 "Why, you just come right on in here, Denise," he'd say.
所以我再也不去陌生人家里了。 That's why I don't go to strange people's houses anymore.
我一直把门锁着，但那解决不了任何问题。 I keep the doors locked at all times, but that's not gonna solve anything.
你不会阻止一架飞机撞向你的房子吧? You're not gonna stop a plane from crashin' onto your house, are you?
不。邮递员给我送来了不请自来的邮件。 No. The mailman brings me unsolicited mail.
邮票可能是被艾滋病患者舔过的。 The postage stamp could've been licked by somebody with AIDS.
我妈妈坚持要出去就已经对我的生命构成了威胁。 My mother's a threat to my life just by persistin' to go out there.
-哪里?你妈妈去哪儿了?-巴瑞 - Out where? Where does your mother go? - Barry--
巴瑞，你知道加州有一场可怕的沙尘暴吗? Barry, did you know there's this terrible dust storm in California?
里面有真菌孢子，这些孢子… It has these fungus spores in it, and these spores...
进入人们的肺部和血液… get into people's lungs and their bloodstream...
它生长，然后杀死它们。 and it grows, and then it kills them.
奇怪的空气。奇怪的空气，巴瑞。 Strange air. Strange air, Barry.
哦，我听到我妈妈在开门。 Oh, I hear my mother's key in the door.
奇怪的气氛。嗯,嗯, Strange air. Well, uh--
这大概是你和你爱的男人的又一段激动人心的插曲。 That about wraps up another thrilling episode with the man you love to love.
我得回家了，照顾金鱼。 Gotta go home now, take care of the goldfish.
敬请期待，周一《夜话》将在全国播出， Stay tuned, 'cause Monday's when Night Talk begins national syndication,
允许达拉斯的好人们进行口头交流… allowing the good folks of Dallas to have verbal intercourse...
和美国其他地方一样 with the rest of the U.S.A.
但先别走。 But don't go away yet.
如果你有心理问题或者只是想自杀， If you've got any psychological problems or you're just plain suicidal,
希拉·弗莱明医生来了，她会很乐意给你一些可疑的建议。 Dr. Sheila Fleming is here, and she'll be glad to give you some dubious advice.
或者如果你是一个冷静、快乐、正常的人，你可以关掉收音机。 Or if you're just a levelheaded, happy, normal person, you can turn the radio off.
周一之前，我是巴瑞·尚普拉，提醒你… Until Monday, this is Barry Champlaign reminding you that...
棍棒和石头可以打断你的骨头，但言语会造成永久性的伤害。 sticks and stones can break your bones, but words cause permanent damage.
♬坏到骨子里，坏到骨子里 ♪ Bad to the bone B-B-B-B-Bad ♪
是时候把他绑起来，推着他去做周末治疗了。 It's time to strap him up and wheel him a way for his weekend therapy.
但是巴瑞·尚普拉将会在周一带来更多的Night Talk节目… But Barry Champlaign will be back with more Night Talk Monday...
达拉斯KGAB电视台。 on KGAB, Dallas.
-巴瑞，老兄。-怎么了? - Barry, my man. - What's happenin'?
教练来了。你说几句话，然后把杯子给他， The coach is here. You're gonna say a few words and then give him the cup,
然后他就会开口。是的。 and then he's gonna talk. Yeah.
现在，梅尔会在卡座上为你介绍。 Now, you're gonna be introduced by Mel in the booth.
明白了。你听昨晚的节目了吗? Got it. You hear the show last night?
精彩的节目。伟大的节目。 A great show. Great show.
听着，我一直没收到你答应我的签名照… Listen, I never got that autographed picture that you promised...
这样我就可以把它挂在我的餐厅里了 so I can hang it in my restaurant.
你三周前就该寄过来了。我忘了。 You were supposed to send it over three weeks ago. It slipped my mind.
你忘了吗?什么意思?还有什么比这更重要的呢，迪诺? Slipped your mind? What mind? What could be more important than that Dino?
我明天第一件事就送过去。别自找麻烦。 I'll send it over first thing tomorrow. Don't go to any trouble.
没有麻烦。他在哪里? No trouble. Where is he?
他在那儿。 There he is.
别走开。你是最棒的，巴瑞!好吧。 Stick around. You are the greatest, Barry! All right.
再见。再见。 See you. See you later.
他是个好人，对吧?他当然是。 He's a great guy, huh? Of course he is.
他认为你是上帝。是什么惹你生气? He thinks you're God. What bit you in the ass?
你生气是因为我让你给他拍张照片，那是你的工作。 You're pissed 'cause I tell you to get a picture for the guy, which is your job.
我很生气，因为你这一周除了对我指手画脚，一句话都没跟我说。 I'm pissed because you haven't said two words to me all week except to boss me around.
我们一起工作。这就是立场。我是老板。我对你呼来喝去。 We work together. That's the deal. I'm the boss. I boss you around.
-不仅如此。你好像总是生我的气。-打扰一下。 - It's more than that. It's like you're always angry with me. - Excuse me.
你是巴瑞·尚普拉，对吧?是的。 You're Barry Champlaign, aren't you? Yeah.
能给我签个名吗?谢谢。当然可以。 Can I have an autograph? Thanks. Sure thing.
你好。嗨。 Hi. Hi.
给你。非常感谢。 Here you go. Thanks a lot.
我喜欢你的节目。 I love your show.
好的，再见。 Okay, see you later.
回到话题。 Back in the cage.
我上高中的时候经常听你的节目。 I used to listen to your show when I was in high school.
-我应该在做作业 -巴瑞 - I'm supposed to be doing my homework, and-- - Barry?
-你想把支票开给乔·鲍勃吗? -是的。 You wanna make it out to Joe Bob, please? Sure.
你应该先打个电话的。我会过来帮你盖好被子的。 You should have called. I would have come and tucked you in.
谢谢你,巴瑞。上帝保佑。 Thanks, Barry. God bless.
上帝保佑你，乔·鲍勃。 God bless you, Joe Bob.
节目走向全国很重要。让我们一起努力。 The show going national is important. Let's work together.
在迪茨身边要小心点。 Just be a little more careful around this guy Dietz.
这是件大事，巴瑞。 This is a big thing, Barry.
是的。我才不要往杆子上抹油呢。 Right. I'm not greasing my way up a pole.
我讨厌当我像你的制作人一样跟你说话时好吧。 I resent it that when I talk to you like your producer... All right.
你把我当女朋友 you treat me like a girlfriend,
当我以女朋友的身份跟你说话时，你却把我当成妻子。 and when I talk to you like your girlfriend, you treat me like your wife.
我不明白你们谈话的大意。 I'm not following the drift of this conversation.
我们一起工作，一起睡觉。就是这样。 We work together, we sleep together. That's it.
我不知道我们什么时候开始约会的，当时我在参加一个自助课程。 I didn't know when we started seeing each other I was enrolling in a self-help course.
如果我生气，那就是我。 If I'm angry, that's who I am.
不管是好是坏，这就是我走到今天的原因。 For better or for worse, that's what got me where I am today.
如果你觉得外面的生活很艰难，那就感谢你生下来不是我。 If you think it's tough on the outside, just be thankful you weren't born me.
我一定是疯了才跟你吵架。 I've gotta be out of my mind picking a fight with you.
你今天心情不好吗?这是问题所在吗? You a little moody today? Is that the problem?
原谅我。你是巴瑞·尚普兰先生吗? Excuse me. Are you Mr. Barry Champlaign?
嗯,也许吧。 Uh, maybe.
能给我签个名吗?当然,当然。 Could I have your autograph? Sure, sure.
你在节目上表现得很好。 You do a great job on the show.
没有你我做不到。谢谢你！ I couldn't do it without you. Thank you.
我一直在听你的节目。 I listen to your show all the time.
我觉得你是个恶心，满嘴脏话，令人作呕的男人， I think you're a sick, foul-mouthed, disgusting man,
你让人们一年365天都觉得恶心。 and you make people really nauseous 365 days a year.
这正好说明了受虐狂是什么样的人，他们一年365天都在听。 It just goes to show what masochists people are, they listen 365 days a year.
我不知道他们为什么不播你的节目。我们离开这里吧。 I don't know why they leave your show on the air. Let's get outta here.
我认识的每个人都讨厌它。这让我想把收音机扔了。 Everybody I know hates it. It makes me wanna throw my radio out.
我们走吧。如果你不喜欢这个节目，为什么还要听呢? Let's go. If you don't like the show, why do you listen?
因为我在等稍后更好的节目。 'Cause I'm waitin' for a better program that's on later.
等待下一个节目?达拉斯还有30个节目。 Waiting for another program? There are 30 other shows on in Dallas.
你每晚都听我的节目。是有意义的。 You listen to my show every night. Makes sense.
我真的为你感到难过，我觉得你应该为自己感到羞耻。 I feel real sorry for you, and I think you should be ashamed of yourself.
-你真是个可悲的书呆子。-我应该感到羞愧吗? - You're such a pathetic nerd. - I should be ashamed?
至少我不会在公共场合出现，半醉半醒，把自己弄得一团糟。 At least I don't show up in public, half in the bag, making an utter jerk out of myself.
你没有信誉。你喜欢我做的事。你需要我。 You have no credibility. You like what I do. You need me.
但你一点幽默感都没有，所以你永远无法欣赏这节目， But you have no sense of humor, which is why you can never enjoy the show,
这就是为什么你是个失败者，就像所有没有幽默感的人一样。 which is why you're a loser, like all people who have no sense of humor.
而你绝对是其中之一。再见。 And you are categorically one of them. Good-bye.
-此外 -女士，你到底是怎么回事 - Furthermore-- - Lady, what the hell is the matter with you?
你做了什么?你的西装怎么了?上帝。 What'd you do? What happened to your suit? Jesus.
好吧，你会没事的。 All right, you're gonna be fine.
来吧。我们走吧。 Come on. Let's go.
我们所有人都是为了S.M.U的一件重要而激动人心的事而来， All of us are here for something very important and exciting at S.M.U.,
我想你知道我在说什么。 and I think you know what I'm talking about.
谁准备好迎接新的开始了?今年秋天去看野马橄榄球队怎么样? Who's ready for a new beginning? How about Mustang football this fall?
我也是这么想的。 That's what I thought.
现在，现在，为大家介绍S.M.U橄榄球的新负责人， Now-- Now, to introduce the new man in charge of football here at S.M.U.,
我们自己的KGAB电台名人——你爱爱的男人—— our own KGAB radio personality-- the man you love to love--
女士们先生们，巴瑞·尚普拉先生! ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Barry Champlaign!
谢谢你！在我今晚过来的路上，我 Thank you. On my way over here tonight, I--
我发现 I was finding out that--
他们爱我。他们真的很爱我。 They love me. They really love me.
女士们先生们，让我们冷静下来。 Ladies and gentlemen, let's calm down.
我从未经历过这样的欢迎。 A different kind of welcome than I've ever experienced.
巴瑞吗? Barry?
巴瑞! Barry!
巴瑞。 Barry.
喂?劳拉，我是丹。巴瑞在吗? Hello? Laura, it's Dan. Is Barry there?
等一下。 Hang on a second.
是丹。嗯? It's Dan. Hmm?
我吵醒你了吗?我很抱歉。 Did I wake you up? I'm sorry.
不，我总是在上班前十个小时起床。 No, I always get up ten hours before I have to go to work.
今天是周日，你不用自我厌恶了。 It's Sunday, your day off from self-loathing.
你说你不想迪茨盯着你，所以我们喝了一杯。 You said you didn't want Dietz breathing down your neck, so we had a drink.
他是个精明的家伙。爱你，爱这节目。你应该和他坐下来谈谈。 He's a sharp guy. Loves you, loves the show. You should sit down with him, have a chat.
他现在要给你下命令了吗? Is he gonna give you orders now?
我知道你会这么想，所以我安排了周日早午餐见面。 I figured you'd look at it that way, so I set up a meeting for Sunday brunch.
什么?他的想法很不错，巴仔。 What? He's got some great ideas, Bar.
就算它爬到他膝盖骨上，他也不会知道。 The guy wouldn't know an idea if it crawled on his kneecap.
稍等一分钟。 Just hold your horses for one minute.
恰克和我决定在我们上电视之前我们应该制定一些基本规则。 Chuck and I decided before we hit national air we should establish a few ground rules.
基本规则吗?这是什么，丹?是电台还是机场? Ground rules? What is this, Dan? A radio station or an airport?
你他妈能闭上嘴听我说吗?不，我不会听你的。 Will you shut the fuck up and listen? No, I won't listen to you.
我知道，当那个食人魔公司走进我的工作室时，我就有麻烦了。 I knew that when that corporate cannibal came into my studio I was in trouble.
这对你有什么区别?这只是一场表演，对吧? What difference does it make to you? It's just a show, right?
你是说我不在乎吗?没人比我更在乎。我不想听。 Are you saying I don't care? Nobody cares more than I do. I don't wanna hear it.
我明天晚上会来，我要做和每天晚上一样的节目。 I'm gonna come in tomorrow night, I'm gonna do the same show I do every night.
然后搞砸交易。如果这是真的，是的。 And blow the deal. If it means that, yes.
要么我做节目，要么我不做节目。再见。 I do my show, or I don't do a show. Good-bye.
你f—— You f--
我要尿尿。 I gotta take a piss.
-你好? -巴瑞在吗? - Hello? - Is Barry there?
请问您是哪位?听着，我赶时间。你能把巴瑞叫来吗? Who's calling, please? Look, I'm in a rush. Could you just get Barry?
巴瑞，再打电话!是个女人! Barry, phone again! It's a woman!
要她的电话号码。我会给她回电话的。他会给你回电话的。 Get her number. I'll call her back. He'll call you back.
这是公用电话。我不能给你回电话。你是哪位? It's a pay phone. I can't call you back. Who is this?
告诉巴瑞是他前妻打来的。哈! Look, just tell Barry it's his ex-wife. Huh!
这是公用电话。她不能给你回电话。是你前妻打来的。 It's a pay phone. She can't you call back. It's your ex-wife.
狗屎。 Shit.
给我。艾伦,你好。我现在在机场。还记得吗? Give me that. Ellen, hi. I'm down at the airport. Remember?
什么机场?达拉斯。你怎么看?今天是星期天。 What airport? Dallas. What do you think? It's Sunday.
你叫我来的。嗯，很好。 You told me to be here. Uh, well, great.
你是太忙了，还是来接我? Are you too busy, or are you coming to get me?
是的。不，我不忙。我只是在这里做一些工作。 Yeah. No, I'm not busy. I'm just doing some work here.
谁接的电话?你不是说你一个人吗。 Who answered the phone? I thought you said you were alone.
是我的秘书。艾伦，你坐的是哪家航空公司的飞机? It's just my secretary. Look, Ellen, what airline are you on?
美国航空公司。也许我该走了。 American Airlines. Maybe I should just leave.
不，你待在那儿。20分钟后见，好吗? No, you stay there. I'll see you in 20 minutes, okay?
你最好在这里。好的，20分钟后见。 You better be here. Yeah, I'll see you in 20 minutes.
你还好吗?我很好。20分钟后见。 Are you all right? I'm fine. I'll see you in 20 minutes.
好的。再见。再见。 Okay. See ya. Bye.
我现在就去找她。 I gotta get her now.
我的鞋呢? Where are my shoes?
什么?别那样看我。 What? Don't give me that look.
嘿。 Hey.
嘿，过来。她想在这里参加全国节目。 Hey, come here. She wants to be here for the national show.
我该怎么办?说不?嗯? What am I supposed to do? Say no? Huh?
丹想要什么? What did Dan want?
想让我去拍迪茨的马屁。 Wants me to come in and kiss Dietz's ass.
我让他吻我的麦克风。 I told him to kiss my microphone.
看,呃—— Look, uh--
你走之前能把这里收拾一下吗?嗯? Can you clean up around here a bit before you go? Huh?
我的鞋呢? Where's my shoes?
我晚点打给你，好吗? I'll call you later, okay?
-你看起来不错。-谢谢。 - You look nice. - Thanks.
你看起来很棒。你看起来也不错。 You look great. You look good too.
除了我皱巴巴的衣服。除了，我想你了，那又怎样? Except for my wrinkled clothes. Except for-- I miss you, so what?
那你最近在做什么?我讨厌你半夜给我打电话。 So what have you been doing? I hate when you call me in the middle of the night.
卢很生我的气，我跟他吵了一架。 Lou is so pissed off at me, I had a fight.
最后我和卢吵了一架。你配不上卢。 I had a fight at the end of this with Lou. You're too good for Lou.
别说了，巴瑞。巴瑞，别说了。 Don't start, Barry. Barry, don't start.
你去健身俱乐部了吗?你真是个混蛋。 You been going to a health club? You're such a jerk.
原谅我吗?你去健身俱乐部了吗? Excuse me? You been going to a health club or something?
为什么?你看起来棒极了。 Why? You look dynamite.
我离开了你。因为我离开了你，所以我看起来很漂亮。 I left you. I look dynamite 'cause I left you.
上帝。我花一点时间，在我自己身上。 Jesus. I spend time, a little, on my own self.
我也在工作。我可不会听命于人。 I'm working too. I'm not at someone's beck and call.
艾伦这个，艾伦那个。我想要这个，我想要那个。 Ellen this, Ellen that. I want this, I want that.
我可能没为你工作过你只要给他带吃的就行了。基本上就是这样吗? I may not have worked for you-- You just have to bring him food. Is that basically it?
不要开始。“再给我一盘意大利面。” Don't start. "Bring me another plate of spaghetti."
你真是个麻烦制造者。 You're such a troublemaker.
他为什么不去健身俱乐部?门可能塞不进去。 Why doesn't he go to the health club? Probably can't fit in the door.
他所做的。巴瑞! He does. Barry!
我对卢没什么不好的感觉。 Hey, I have no bad feelings about Lou.
我很高兴他这么幸运。 I'm glad he's so lucky.
你知道吗，我很高兴有人能对你好一点。 You know, I'm glad that somebody's treating you nice for a change.
我有自己的时间。这有点，你知道，这是 I have some time for myself. It's kinda, you know, it's--
当我和你在一起的时候，我花了很多时间照顾你， When I was with you, I spent so much time taking care of you,
卢有时甚至会照顾我。 and Lou sometimes even takes care of me.
嗯—— Um--
我不知道。这是一种不同的生活方式。 I don't know. It's a different lifestyle.
你就像一个嘉年华， You're like a carnival,
他更像是均质牛奶。 and he's more like homogenized milk.
你为什么盯着我看? Why are you staring at me?
我想你了。 I miss you.
我也想你。 I miss you too.
你对我有什么魔力? What's this hold you have on me?
爱。 Love.
我很抱歉。我不应该说那样的话。我忘记了。 I'm sorry. I'm not supposed to say stuff like that. I forgot.
巴瑞，你想让我怎么做?再次爱上你? Barry, what do you want me to do? Fall in love with you again?
就是为了这个吗?我不希望你做任何事。 Is that what this is about? I don't want you doing anything.
我是说，你在这里。就这些，我很高兴你能来。 I mean, you're here. That's all I-- I'm happy that you're here.
我——我不知道——今天结束时我得走了…… I-- I don't know-- I have to go at the end of the day...
还是明天…… or tomorrow...
我不能一直来来回回 and I can't keep coming back and forth.
我知道，你已经成功了。 I-- You know, you've got success.
你知道吗，最重要的是，你要开始爱自己。 You know, the most important thing is, you've got to start loving yourself.
你懂的。你很好。你真棒。 You got that. You are good. You are wonderful.
现在，感受它，知道你必须有自己的生活。 Now, feel it and know you have to have a life.
找一个有灵魂的人。嗯哼。 Find someone with a soul. Mm-hmm.
不要只是爱上某个女孩的身体。 Don't just fall in love with some girl's body.
我是说，你确实喜欢女孩的身体，不是吗? I mean, you do like a girl's body, didn't you?
唯一的问题是我被抓了。是啊，你能做什么? The only problem was I got caught. Yeah, what can you do?
也许那天你应该待在你妈妈家。 Maybe you should've stayed at your mom's that day.
托尼，把细腰收紧。 Tony, keep the taper nice and tight around the waist.
贾奇想在他老婆面前显得性感。 Judge wants to look hot for his old lady.
你不觉得在颁奖典礼上穿这些翻领太过了吗? Don't you think these lapels are too much for an awards ceremony?
法官大人，明年这个时候每个人都要穿这种翻领了。 Judge, everyone's gonna be wearing these lapels by this time next year.
等着瞧。你需要一件衬衫来搭配。 Wait and see. You need a shirt to go with that.
你对即将到来的公投有什么看法? What do you think about that referendum coming up?
我也想问你同样的问题。完美的。 I was gonna ask you the same question. Perfect.
免费送你这个。我和泰迪送的礼物。你太好了。 Throwin' this in free of charge. Gift from me and Teddy. Very kind of you.
法官大人，你激发了我女人的本性。你是美丽的。 Judge, you bring out the woman in me. You're gorgeous.
嘿,漂亮。 Hey, good-looking.
托尼，你带法官回更衣室吧。 Tony, why don't you show the judge back to the dressing rooms.
我帮你把这个拿上去。谢谢你！ I'll just take this up for you. Thank you.
出去购物了吗?买过透视内衣吗?啊哈。 Been out shopping? Buy any see-through undies? Uh-huh.
我想我们可以一起吃午饭。 I thought we'd have lunch together.
很乐意，宝贝。和法官共进午餐。 Love to, babe. Having lunch with the judge.
他会帮我处理夜店的分区变化。 He's gonna help me out with that zoning variance for the nightclub.
好吧，工作很重要。晚餐呢? Okay, work's important. What about dinner?
我不能。莫·汤普森的男人派对。 I can't. Moe Thompson's stag party.
市议会主席。来吧。 City Council president. Come on.
确保没有女人。嘿。 Make sure there are no women. Hey.
明晚，你和我，共进晚餐，就我们俩。任性吗? Tomorrow night, you and me, dinner, just the two of us. The Caprice?
承诺吗?花吗?墨西哥流浪乐队乐队吗?我保证。桌布。 Promise? Flowers? Mariachi bands? I promise. Tablecloths.
巴瑞。音乐。什么,文斯? Barry. Music. What, Vince?
你一定要见的人。猜猜这是谁。来吧，猜猜看。什么,文斯? Someone you gotta meet. Guess who this is. Go ahead, guess. What, Vince?
我不知道。你的表哥艾尔。 I have no idea. Your Cousin Al.
不。真是个小丑。杰夫，说句话。 No. What a joker. Jeff, say something.
这是什么，执行封印时间吗?切断另一个电话。 What is this, performing seal time? Cut another caller off.
你的历史。Ptt !你是镇上的热门人物。 You're history. Ptt! You're on Talk of the town.
你是杰夫·费舍尔。 You're Jeff Fisher.
在我的店里。我简直不敢相信。我一直在听你的节目。 In my store. I can't believe it. I listen to your show all the time.
你很棒，伙计。你看起来和我想的不一样。 You're great, man. You look different than I thought.
-你以为我穿马刺会有6尺2寸高?-是的。 - You thought I'd be 6'2", in spurs? - Yeah.
这是我妻子，艾伦。很高兴认识你。 This is my wife, Ellen. Nice to meet you.
是啊，节目里最疯狂的人会打电话来。 Yeah, the craziest people call in that show.
我有时会给自己打电话。 I think of calling myself sometimes.
你太害羞了，对吧?我看得出来。 You're too shy, right? I can tell.
我不是一直都在听吗?他认为你是上帝。 Don't I listen all the time? He thinks you're God.
谢谢，先生，真希望有你的照片。我们可以把它挂起来。 Thank you, sir. Wish we had your picture. We could put it up.
我会给你寄一份。你的声音真不错。 I'll send you one. You've got quite a voice.
声音吗?你做过广播吗? Voice? You ever do radio?
我想过做广播节目。只进来了一秒钟。 I've thought of doing some radio. Only came in for a second.
我得走了。听着，文斯，把夹克送到我家。 I gotta run. Listen, Vince, send the jacket to my home.
-呃呃你叫什么名字?-巴瑞。巴瑞·高尔登。是的。 - Uh-- Uh-- What's your name? - Barry. Barry Golden. Yeah.
只要你在附近，就顺便去车站。 Anytime you're in the neighborhood, stop by the station.
很乐意带你四处转转，让你说几句话，当然。 Love to show you around, let you say a couple of words, Yeah, sure.
卖几套西装，宣传一下商店。 sell some suits, plug the store.
我的秘书会把照片寄过来。别忘了袖子。很高兴认识你。 My secretary'll send the picture. Don't forget the sleeves. Nice meeting you.
再见!再见! Bye-bye! Bye!
主题是幻想的爱情。 The topic is fantasy love affairs.
你想和谁谈恋爱? Who would you like to have a love affair with?
我们和我们的好朋友巴瑞在一起。这周你叫什么名字? We're here with our good friend, Barry. What's your name this week?
巴瑞·尚普拉，伙计。巴瑞·尚普拉来了 Barry Champlaign, man. Barry Champlaign, man, is here,
他说的是“他的妻子”。嗯哼。 and he has said "his wife." Mm-hmm.
他们应该是名人， These are supposed to be famous people,
除非你妻子比我想象的要频繁得多 unless your wife's gotten around a lot more than I think she has.
来吧。你妻子不听，好吗? Come on. Your wife's not listening, okay?
你真正想和谁亲密接触? Who would you really like to get up close and personal with?
我觉得玛丽·奥斯蒙德很性感。这是玛丽·奥斯蒙德的。 Marie Osmond, I think, is very sexy. That's one for Marie Osmond.
黑色皮革的，是的。工作室里的鱼脸红了。 In black leather, yeah. The studio fish is blushing.
她是性的化身，伙计。她是摩门教徒，对吗? She is sex incarnate, man. She's a Mormon, isn't she?
摩门教徒相信重婚罪。玛丽，我现在就想娶你。 Mormons believe in bigamy. Marie, I want to marry you right now.
到电台来。我要你，玛丽。 Come down to the station. I want you, Marie.
好吧!我们再接一个电话。是啊，你上了全城热议。 Okay! We'll take another caller. Yeah, you're on Talk of the town.
你知道我怎么想吗?你们俩真是个自由主义者。 Yeah, you know what I think? You two are a couple of liberal pinkos.
我就是这么想的。你们两个是同性恋吗?你是这样的人吗? That's what I think. Are you two homos? Is that what you are?
你知道你是什么，我的朋友，你是历史。 You know what you are, my friend, you are history.
等待。打电话的人说得有道理。 Wait. The caller has a point.
没错，先生，杰夫·费舍和我是恋人。 It's true, sir, indeed, Jeff Fisher and I are lovers.
过去15年都是这样。事实上，我们现在就牵着手。 Have been for the last 15 years. In fact, we're holding hands right now.
可能还有黑人爱好者。是的，你是什么种族，先生? Probably nigger lovers too. Yeah, what race are you, sir?
我是白人，我为此感到骄傲。 I'm white, and I'm proud of it.
作为一个白人，让我问你一个问题。 As one white man to another, let me ask you a question.
你知道美国白人每年在防晒霜上花多少钱吗? Do you know how much white Americans spend every year on suntan lotion?
1.65亿美元! $165 million!
光是变成棕色就花了这么多钱。 That's a lot of money to spend just to turn brown.
你知道他们为什么想变成棕色吗?杰夫，你知道为什么吗? You know why they wanna turn brown? Jeff, do you know why?
让我们接另一位来电者。这是一个有趣的问题。 Let's take another caller. This is an interesting question.
他们想变成棕色，因为他们暗地里想变成黑色。 They wanna turn brown because they secretly want to be black.
你知道他们为什么想变成黑人吗?这些问题和其他问题—— You know why they wanna be black? These and other questions--
因为她们在性方面感到自卑。 Because they feel sexually inferior.
你是个自作聪明的同性恋。这就是你。 You're a smart-mouth homo. That's what you are.
好吧,好吧。你是近亲繁殖的倒退 Okay, okay. You're an inbred throwback--
Ha-hoo !这是一场德州竞技表演，没错。我们会用水管把他们冲走…… Ha-hoo! It's a Texas rodeo, yes indeed. We'll hose 'em down...
广告后马上回来。 and be right back after this commercial break.
我一说停，你就闭嘴。 When I say "cut," you stop talking.
我们之前已经讨论过了。你很有趣，观众也喜欢你， We've been through this before. You're fun and the audience likes you,
但我可不想因为这破事丢了我的执照 but I'm not gonna lose my license over this shit.
你为什么会被吊销驾照? Why would you lose your license?
-叫《标准与实践》 -杰夫，七号线 - It's called Standards and Prac-- - Jeff, pick up seven.
谢谢你！标准和实践。你听说过吗?是吗? Thank you. Standards and Practices. You ever heard of it? Yeah?
哦，他很有趣。 Oh, he's funny, yeah.
是的，是的，当然。 Yeah, right, yeah, sure.
卖衣服。 Sells suits.
明天10点? Tomorrow at 10:00?
我会问他的。等一等。 I'll ask him. Hold on.
你能明天早上10点来见老板吗? Can you come in tomorrow morning, meet the boss at 10:00?
-为什么?-我要做的是… - What for? - What I would do is...
有游泳池和桑拿房 have a swimming pool and a sauna--
无聊。拜托，你可以做得更好的。 Boring. Come on, you could do better than that.
四号线。南希，你有一百万美元会做什么? Line four. Nancy, what would you do with a million bucks?
巴瑞，我很喜欢你的节目。 Barry, I just love your show.
把你的尺寸和裸照发给我，我会回复你的。 Send me your measurements and a nude photograph, and I'll get back to you.
一号线，格雷普韦恩的弗兰克。是的,弗兰克? Line one, Frank in Grapevine. Yeah, Frank?
我是墨西哥人，真有你的。我是犹太人。 I'm a Chicano-- Good for you. I'm a Jew.
现在，这是认真的，伙计。错误的节目。 Now, this is serious, dude. Wrong show.
听着，斯图，我觉得我们整晚都没有一个像样的答案来回答这个问题。 Look, Stu, I don't think we've had a decent answer to this question all night long.
好了，伙计们，你们得给我一个好的答案， Now, come on, people, you gotta give me a good answer,
好的，稍等。不然我就惩罚你 Yeah, hold on. or I'm gonna punish ya.
好的，让我们去 Okay, let's go to--
我们去。来，跟巴瑞谈谈。来吧。和巴瑞谈谈。 Let's go to-- Here, talk to Barry. Come on. Talk to Barry.
一号线，你接通了。说点什么，什么都行。准备好了吗?说点什么。 Line one, you're on. Say something, anything. Ready? Say something.
说点什么。我是谢丽尔·安。 Say something. Uh, yeah, this is Cheryl Ann.
谢丽尔·安，你要一百万美金做什么? What are you gonna do with a million bucks, Cheryl Ann?
如果我有一百万美元，我会买自己的无线电发射机…… If I had a million bucks, I would buy my own radio transmitter...
开始我自己的脱口秀 and start my own talk show,
这样我就不用听你的声音了 so I wouldn't have to listen to your voice.
如果你这么讨厌我的声音，为什么不换台呢? If you hate my voice so much, why don't you change the station?
我不能。为什么不。 I can't. Why not.
我在监狱里，听什么节目都是典狱长选的。 I'm in prison, and the warden picks the shows we listen to.
很好。你就是在说谎。你喜欢我的声音。 Good. You're lying. You love my voice.
我讨厌你的声音。你喜欢我的声音。 I hate your voice. You love my voice.
这是一种爱恨交织的局面。你总是听不够我的声音。 It's a love-hate situation. You can't get enough of my voice.
来吧。承认。你胡说! Come on. Admit it. You're full of it!
如果你不喜欢我的声音，那就挂了。来吧。挂电话了。 If you don't love my voice, then hang up. Come on. Hang up.
你爱我。来吧。挂电话了。挂断电话! You love me. Come on. Hang up. Hang up!
我恨你，巴瑞·尚普兰! I hate you, Barry Champlaign!
漂亮。我很喜欢。 Beautiful. I love it.
还不够好。伙计们，你们又让我失望了。 Not good enough. Folks, you let me down once again.
为此，你必须受到惩罚。 For that, you must be punished.
这是比吉斯，这首歌送给你，谢丽尔·安， This is the Bee Gees, and this one's going out to you, Cheryl Ann,
连续唱十遍《周六夜狂热》 singing "Saturday Night Fever" ten times in a row.
我发誓，这是我们这几周以来最棒的一次通话。 Best call we've had in a couple of weeks, I swear.
太棒了，亲爱的。我们得让谢丽尔·安多打电话过来。 That was great, honey. We gotta get Cheryl Ann calling more often.
他们在吃这些东西，巴瑞。看到今天报纸上的那篇文章了吗? They're eating this stuff up, Barry. See that piece in the paper today?
关于我要找保镖的事?伟大的宣传。 The thing about me looking for a bodyguard? Great publicity.
你真的想连续十次这样吗? You want this ten times in a row, seriously?
不，要三次。我马上就回来。 No, make it three times. I'll be back in a minute.
是三次。美丽的节目。我很喜欢。 Three it is. Beautiful show. I love it.
♬燃烧吧，宝贝，燃烧吧 ♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪
♬燃烧，宝贝，燃烧♬在这里? - ♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪♪ - In here?
哦。 Ooh.
太棒了。是吻还是电话? That was great. The kiss or the call?
丹刚给了我一些好消息。 Dan just gave me some good news.
我得到了上午10点的位置。 I'm getting the 10:00 a.m. slot.
他在为我自己的节目雇制片人。 He's hiring a producer just for my own show.
哦，巴瑞，太好了。是的。你想做吗? Oh, Barry, that's wonderful. Yeah. You wanna do it?
嗯?你是最合适的人选。 Huh? You'd be the best person to do it.
你很聪明，很努力，我让你做什么你就做什么。 You're smart, you're hardworking, you do everything I tell you to do.
巴瑞，我觉得你最好找别人。 Um, Barry, I think you better get someone else.
我觉得这不是个好主意。这是个好主意。 I don't think it's a good idea. It's a great idea.
来吧。你必须这么做。 Come on. You gotta do it.
不，我不这么认为。这样做。来吧。我需要你。 No, I don't think so. Do it. Come on. I need you.
巴瑞，如果我为你工作，就没有乐趣了? Barry, if I work for you, the fun would go out it, you know?
气氛会很紧张。甚至会毁了我们的婚姻。 There'd be a lot of tension. It might even screw up our marriage.
去他妈的我们的婚姻。来吧。这很重要。我需要你。 Fuck our marriage. Come on. This is important. I need you.
你不希望这节目尽可能地好吗?你不是在我后面吗? Don't you want the show to be as good as it can be? Aren't you behind me?
你在开玩笑吧。当然我不是在开玩笑。 You gotta be joking. Of course I'm not joking.
你刚说"去你的婚姻" You just said, "Fuck our marriage."
我在开玩笑。 I'm joking.
这真是太无聊了。我要换一下，好吗? This is getting really boring. I'm gonna switch it, all right?
我只是觉得 I just thought that--
算了吧。 Forget it.
我为你感到骄傲。 I'm very proud of you.
这对你来说太棒了。 It's wonderful for you.
来吧。好吗? Come on. Okay?
嗯?来吧。好吗? Hmm? Come on. Okay?
巴瑞吗? Barry?
宝贝，我不想进水槽。 Baby, I don't wanna go in the sink.
是啊!在水槽里! Yeah! In the sink!
我不想进水槽。 I don't wanna go in the sink.
哇咔!嗨,艾伦! Oh-ho! Hi, Ellen!
嗨,斯图。 Hi, Stu.
-你要开派对吗?-是啊，水槽派对 - Are you having a party? - Yeah, a sink party.
嗨，亲爱的，我妈妈不太舒服，所以我决定回家。 Oh, uh, hi, hon. My mother wasn't feeling well, so I decided to come home.
艾伦，我以为你和你妈妈 Ellen, I thought you and your mother were--
呃——呃—— uh-- Eh--
嗯,什么—— Um, what--
你们俩在忙什么? what are you two up to?
-听着，我最好出去再回来。-巴瑞，回来。 - Look, I better go out and come back in. - Barry, come back.
你打断了我! You cut me off!
嘿，特蕾莎，过来。跟斯图伊一起来， Hey, Theresa, come here. Come with Stuey,
和咪咪还有斯图伊一起吃三明治 and have a Stuey sandwich with Mimi and Stuey.
你想要一个吗? You want one?
不。 No.
他成了百万富翁。怎么样? He became a millionaire. How about that?
勾起我的回忆。 Brings back memories.
很多变化。我更善良，我赚的钱更多… A lot of changes. I'm nicer, I make more money...
而我只挂了七分之一的电话 and I only hang up on one out of seven.
…达拉斯的人气先生，巴瑞·尚普拉 ...with Dallas' own Mr. Popularity, Barry Champlaign.
我是西德尼·格林伯格，提醒大家，重要的不是你吃了多少， I'm Sidney Greenberg, reminding you that it's not how much you take,
而是你带回家的钱。 it's how much you take home.
嘿! Hey!
芝加哥怎么样?你看起来很棒。太好了。你看起来也很棒。 How's Chicago? You look great. Great. You look great too.
艾伦，你在这儿干什么? Ellen, what are you doing here?
我不能错过巴瑞的首映式。 I couldn't miss Barry's premiere.
是的，我们只有几分钟时间。你介意我把巴瑞偷走吗? Yeah, we only have a couple of minutes. You mind if I steal Barry?
你知道休息室在哪里。喝杯咖啡。我们会赶上来的。 You know where the green room is. Have a cup of coffee. We'll catch up.
当然。再见。 Sure. Bye.
晚上,巴瑞。我有两分钟时间。是什么? Evening, Barry. I have two minutes. What is it?
我长话短说。我知道你还有节目要做。 I'll make it brief. I know you've got your show to do.
巴瑞，我们的日程安排出了点小问题… Barry, we've run into some slight scheduling problems...
关于国家饲料。 concerning the national feed.
我们得把它至少推迟几周。 We're gonna have to delay it for at least a couple of weeks.
嗨,Stuey。 Hi, Stuey.
艾伦!不会吧!我就知道你会来。 Ellen! Holy cow! I knew you'd show up.
天啊，让我看看你。你是在吃年轻药还是什么? Jesus, let me look at you here. Are you taking young pills or something?
想和我一起睡吗?你一定很兴奋。 Wanna step into my crib with me? You must be excited.
是啊，我都快吓死了。开什么玩笑? Oh, yeah, I'm jumping out of my skin. You kidding me?
我打电话给我妈，告诉她我们要向全国直播。 I called my mother and told her we're gonna broadcast all over the country.
她说:“斯图尔特，这太美了。哪个国家?” She says, "Stuart, that's beautiful. What country?"
很高兴见到你。很高兴见到你。 Good to see you. It's good to see you.
大家好，我是劳拉·尼克尔森。我跟你通过电话。嗨。 Hi, I'm Laura Nicholson. I spoke to you on the phone. Hi.
哦，很高兴认识你。你一定是巴瑞的秘书。 Oh, it's nice to meet you. You must be Barry's secretary.
不，事实上，我是他的制片人。我们马上就要开始了。原谅我。 No, actually, I'm his producer. We're going in a few seconds. Excuse me.
-走吧。-来自孤星州的中心地带， - Let's go. - From the heart of the Lone Star state,
现在是达拉斯最受欢迎的脱口秀节目《夜话》的时间。 it's time for Dallas' most popular talk show, Night Talk...
-和巴瑞·尚普拉。-坏到骨头♬♬ - with Barry Champlaign. - ♪ Bad to bone♪♪
KGAB的电话线路已经开通并准备好接听您的电话… The KGAB phone lines are open and ready for your call...
在555 -说话。 at 555-TALK.
很高兴认识你。很高兴认识你。这不是很令人兴奋吗? Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Isn't this exciting?
我刚收到一个可怕的消息。 I've just received some terrible news.
《夜话》今晚不会在全国范围内播出。 Night Talk will not be broadcast nationally tonight...
由于常规的公司，大企业;，效率低下， due to the usual corporate, big business, inefficiency,
马虎和官僚主义。 sloppiness and bureaucracy.
我刚接到通知，日程安排有问题。 I've just been informed of a scheduling problem.
没有私人恩怨，没有逻辑，一切如常。 Nothing personal, nothing logical, just business as usual.
也许下个星期，也许下个月，这个节目就会风靡全国。 Maybe the show will go national next week, maybe next month.
似乎没有人知道。我很抱歉。 No one seems to know. I'm sorry.
我觉得我让你们这些听众失望了。 I feel I've let you, the listeners, down.
但我在这行干了这么久，知道你可能会输…… But I've been in this business long enough to know you can lose the battle...
还能赢得战争。 and still win the war.
《夜话》仍然有它的目的，有它必须达到的标准， Night Talk still has a purpose, a standard to which it must rise,
我不会让你失望的 and I will not let you down on that score.
这个节目就是要说出该说的话。 This show is about saying what's got to be said.
这就是我们今晚要做的。 That's what we're gonna do here tonight.
今晚，什么都可以。 Tonight, anything goes.
我想听你说。我想让你告诉我你的真实想法。 I wanna hear you. I want you to tell me what you really think.
没有限制。电话555 -说话。我很抱歉。 No holds barred. Call 555-TALK. I'm sorry.
门开着。用你最好的办法来对付我。 The door is open. Hit me with your best shot.
晚间谈话。来自洛克威尔的杰瑞。 Night Talk. Jerry from Rockwell.
你在。巴瑞。 You're on. Barry.
你是否曾经怀疑过… have you ever entertained one single doubt...
大屠杀的真相? about the truth of the Holocaust?
我想我们以前谈过这个，先生。 I think we've had this conversation before, sir.
当你对犹太人提出这些指控，当你开始质疑大屠杀， When you make these accusations against Jews, when you start questioning the Holocaust,
我认为你应该有一些现成的事实，而事实就是现成的。 I think you should have some facts available, and the facts are available.
当然了。我们很乐意坐下来和你讨论。 Well, of course. We'd love to sit down and debate them with you.
啊哈。“我们”指的是谁?我说的是"我们"还是"你" Uh-huh. Well, who's "we"? Am I talking to a "we" or a "you"?
巴瑞，我们的信仰是有组织的… Well, Barry, we're organized in our belief...
就像犹太复国主义者的信仰一样。 the same way the Zionists are organized in their belief.
我们可以讨论一下。这将是非常简单的。 We could debate it. It would be very easy and simple.
它对你来说更简单也更有价值， It would be far more simple and valuable for you to get in touch with,
比如说，华盛顿的大屠杀博物馆。 let's say, the Holocaust Museum down in Washington.
啊哈。他们会把所有死于二战的犹太人的名字… Uh-huh. They'll send you the names of all the Jews...
发给你 who died during World War II.
他们有所有这些信息。我是说，第一个说如果有人犯了错 They have all this information. I mean, the first one to say if somebody made a mistake--
他们说有600万人死亡?可能是五百万或七百万。 They say six million died? It could've been five million or seven million.
也可以是2。 It could be two also.
这是问题所在吗?两百万无辜的人死了? Is that the issue? That two million innocent people died?
为什么要让一个无辜的人死去，不管是犹太人还是非犹太人?我同意。 Why should one single innocent person die, Jew or non-Jew? I agree.
但是犹太复国主义者正在利用这个问题和美国公众的内疚…… But the Zionists are using this issue and the guilt on the American public...
勒索我们缴纳的税款。 to extort from us our tax dollars.
我们掌握的数据显示，以色列的每个家庭…… The figures we have say every family in Israel...
拿走了我们一万多美元的税款。 gets over $10,000 of our taxes.
你再也看不到比以色列更多的集体贫困了。 Well, you'll never see more collective poverty than in Israel.
我强烈建议你去那里旅行。巴瑞，你要做的就是去西弗吉尼亚。 I urge you to take a trip there. All you got to do, Barry, is go to West Virginia.
这跟西弗吉尼亚有什么关系?或者内布拉斯加州或者爱达荷州， What does West Virginia have to do with it? Or Nebraska or Idaho,
-你会看到一个又一个农民倒下 -嗯哼 - where you'll see farmer after farmer biting the dust, - Mm-hmm.
-失去他们的农场，无法获得体面的贷款。-是的。 - losing their farms, can't get decent loans. - Yeah.
如果我们向以色列提供贷款和赠款， If we had the loans and grants that are sent to Israel,
我们就不会失去我们的农场，它是这个国家的支柱。 we wouldn't be losing our farms, which is the backbone of this country.
如果一个女人在市场上和你竞争，抢走了你的工作怎么办? And what if a woman competes with you in the marketplace and takes your job?
如果黑人男人开始和白人女人约会结婚怎么办?哦! What if black men start dating and marrying white women? Oh!
如果是同性恋在教育你的孩子呢? And what if homosexuals are teaching your children?
如果你晚上不敢在街上走呢? And what if you're afraid to walk the streets at night?
如果你看到雅皮士们变得富有，而你却在失业大军中苦苦挣扎呢? What if you see yuppies getting rich while you're standing in the unemployment line?
如果你的政府派你去越南… And what if your government sends you to Vietnam...
去打一场毫无胜算的战争? to fight a war they have no chance of winning?
如果你的国家正在失去呢? And what if your country is slipping away, lost?
我知道是怎么回事，朋友。 I know the argument, friend.
这是伟大的历史理论。我以前听过。 It's the great theory of history. I've heard it before.
它说:“当事情不顺的时候， It says, "When things ain't good,
“我没有坐下来做点什么， "instead of getting down and doing something about it,
与其改变自己的生活，还不如责怪别人。” instead of changing your life, it's a hell of a lot easier to blame somebody else."
这在我的书里行不通。 And it just don't wash in my book.
你的谈话节目很精彩，巴瑞，嗯哼。 Well, that's a very nice speech, Barry, Mm-hmm.
但在我看来你在那个电台赚了不少钱。 but it seems to me you're making pretty good money on that station.
既然你不是这里的外地人， And since you're an outsider to these parts and all,
我想，这似乎很难与这里的平民问题联系起来。 it seems difficult, I guess, to relate to the common-folk problems out here.
先生，在你我的生活中，没有自怜的余地。 There is no room for self-pity, sir, in my life or yours.
你应该读读威廉·皮尔斯的《特纳日记》巴瑞。都在那里。 Now, you ought to read the Turner Diaries, Barry, by William Pierce. It's all there.
嗯哼。它说, Mm-hmm. It says--
是的，我很熟悉那部小说——一部开明人士的作品。 Yes, I'm familiar with that novel-- a product of the enlightened man.
-让我说完! -巴瑞，我在五号线找到美女。 - Now, let me finish! - Barry, I got Beauty on five.
它所做的是为即将到来的革命制定计划。嗯哼。 What it does is lays out the plan for the coming revolution. Mm-hmm.
巴瑞，"美国"这个词在哥特语里是"天国"的意思。 See, the word "America, " Barry, means "heavenly kingdom" in the Gothic language.
是的。这是圣经中真正的新耶路撒冷。 Yeah. It's the real new Jerusalem of Scripture.
它告诉你犹太人是怎么冒名顶替，他们拿走了 It shows you how the Jews are impostors who took--
是的，是的，是的。对于那些不知道的人， Yeah, yeah, yeah. For those of you who don't know it,
-它开始于1991年，非常愚蠢。 -没错。 it starts idiotically enough in the year 1991. That's correct.
这是一个年轻的白人种族主义电气工程师写的日记…… It's written as a diary by a young, white, racist, electrical engineer...
他加入了地下准军事组织 who joins an underground paramilitary organization...
-被称为"骑士团" -是的。 known as "The Order." That's right.
-哦，我说的没错吧? -哦,太棒了。 Oh, am I doing all right? Oh, great.
他们发动了一场反对ZOG的革命， They institute a revolution against ZOG,
犹太复国主义接管美国政府（ZOG） the Zionist Occupied Government of America.
在此过程中，他们杀死了所有的混血种族 And along the way, they kill all the mongrel races--
犹太人、黑人、同性恋者、女权主义者…… Jews, blacks, homosexuals, feminists...
还有其他废人。 and other mud people.
这是一本为大脑简单的人写的白痴书…… It's an idiotic book written for people with bubblegum brains...
这种人四年级都没上完，一直在看《变形怪体》的重播。 who never got out of the fourth grade, watching reruns of The Blob.
放松,巴瑞。你也是问题的一部分。 Easy, Barry. You're part of the problem.
你是又一个控制着这个国家的媒体的犹太人， You're another Jew, another weed-eating Jew,
另一个食草的犹太人。 in control of the media of this country.
从那里，你对你不知道的东西做出判断。 And from there, you pass judgement on that which you don't know.
总有一天你，巴瑞，还有成千上万像你一样的人 And there will come a day for you, Barry, and thousands of others like you--
跟黑人女人睡过，还骗过我们 who have slept with black women, who have lied to us--
当你脖子上挂着一张牌子，上面写着， when you will hang from your neck with a placard around it saying,
“我背叛了我的种族。” "I betrayed my race."
你能对一个偏执型精神分裂症患者说什么呢… Well, what can you say to a paranoid schizophrenic...
他是个挂电话的罪犯，不过我猜我挂电话的那天 who's a co ward for hanging up, except that I guess the day that I hang,
我可能会为绞死我的混蛋辩护。 I'll probably defend the asshole who hung me.
电台谈话节目。言论自由并不是真正的自由。 Talk radio. Free speech isn't really free at all.
这有点像俄罗斯轮盘赌。一种非常昂贵的商品。 It's actually a little bit like Russian roulette. A very expensive commodity.
你永远不知道下次按下按钮时会出现什么。 You never know what's gonna come up the next time you push the button.
-对，你在《夜话》 -我改了名字… - Yeah, you're on Night Talk. - I changed my name...
而且没有任何问题就能得到社会保障。 and didn't have any trouble getting Social Security.
我的出生证明上我的名字拼写不同。 My birth certificate has my name spelled differently.
我——喂? And I-- Hello?
是的，非常有趣。你对女同性恋牧师怎么看? Yeah, it's very interesting. What's your view on lesbian priests?
我的观点是什么?自慰? My view on what? How about masturbation?
你对此有什么看法?不，我不喜欢。 You got any view on that? No, I don't.
亚利桑那州的法律规定这是重罪… How about that law in Arizona where it's a felony...
带着裤子里的勃起到处走? to go around with an erection in your pants?
你怎么看?我打电话不是为了这个。 What do you think about that? Well, I-I'm not really calling about that.
嗯哼。如果他们想做，就让他们做吧。 Mm-hmm. If they wanna do it, let 'em do it.
是的,什么? Yeah, what?
肯特在三号线。我觉得你不该接这个电话。 Kent's on three. I don't think you should take the call.
甩掉他，巴瑞。巴瑞吗?喂? Lose him, Barry. Barry? Hello?
是的,是的。嗯，这对你来说很好。让他给我接通。 Yeah, yeah. Well, that's just fine for you. Tell him to shoot it to me.
你好,巴瑞吗?喂?很好，很好。 Hello, Barry? Hello? Well, good, good.
这对你有好处。 That's good for you.
天啊，今晚只是回忆往事。 Gee, tonight's just a walk down memory lane.
肯特又和我们在一起了。 And we have Kent with us once again.
是的,肯特。我不是故意挂你电话的。 Yeah, Kent. I didn't mean to hang up on you.
是啊，但你做到了。听着，肯特，你是个骗子。你是个骗子。 Yeah, but you did. Listen, Kent, you're a fake. You're a hoax.
你打电话来编个假故事说你和你女朋友… You call up with some fake-o story about how you and your girlfriend...
吸毒，她吸毒过量… are taking drugs and she's O.D.'d...
你父母在阿卡普尔科斐济。 and your parents are in Acapulco. Fiji.
哦，斐济，对。一个重要的细节。 Oh, Fiji, right. An important detail.
你只是个可怜的，糊涂的孩子。你不知道该怎么做。 You're just this poor, mixed-up kid. You don't know what to do.
-我想她死了!-你想告诉我什么? - I think she's dead! - What are you trying to tell me?
-你女朋友吸毒过量?现在她死了?-我不知道，好吗? - That your girlfriend O.D.'d? Now she's dead? - I don't know, okay?
我就是叫不醒她!是的，我们已经听说了。 I just can't get her to wake up! Yeah, we heard that already.
她口吐白沫。什么? There's foam coming out of her mouth. What?
口吐白沫。 Foam coming out of her mouth.
让我们甩掉这家伙，现在。这是巴瑞的节目，老大。 Let's dump this guy, now. It's Barry's show, boss.
-就是这样。就是这样。——听! - That's it. That's it. - Listen!
我父母在斐济，好吗? My parents are in Fiji, okay?
还有关于我女朋友的事是啊，什么? And the stuff about my girlfriend-- Yeah, what?
她来吧，肯特。说出来吧。 She-- Come on, Kent. Spit it out.
-不，你会打断我的!-我不会打断你的，肯特 - No, you'll cut me off! - I won't cut you off, Kent.
你的承诺吗? You promise?
我保证不会打断你，肯特。 I promise I won't cut you off, Kent.
这一切都是我瞎编的! I made the whole thing up!
肯特?我说谎了。我要打断你了。什么? Kent? I lied. I'm cutting you off. What?
给我滚出去。不,请!听着，我没有撒谎! Get the hell out of here. No, please! Look, I'm not lying!
我得跟你谈谈。你要跟我说话? I gotta talk to you. You gotta talk to me?
你要谈什么?你妈妈割腕自杀了? What are you gonna talk about? Your mother just slit her wrists?
她失血过多而死? She's bleeding to death?
你爸爸呢?嘴里含着猎枪?要打爆他的头吗? How about your father? Got a shotgun in his mouth? Gonna blow his brains out?
告诉我，还有谁死了?来吧。谁死了，肯特? Tell me, who else is dead? Come on. Who's dead, Kent?
谁死了?谁死了?告诉我，谁死了? Who's dead? Who's dead? Tell me, who's dead?
没人死!没人死，巴瑞。 No one's dead! No one's dead, Barry.
来吧。看。 Come on. Look.
我只是想和你谈谈。我们说的。你有两秒钟时间。说话。 I just wanted to talk. We're talking. You got two seconds. Talk.
好吧，我一直都在听你说话。嗯哼。 Okay, I listen to you all the time, you know. Mm-hmm.
我仔细考虑了你说的话，巴仔。是的。 I think about what you say, Bar. Yeah.
你说的话真酷。嗯哼。 You say such cool stuff. Mm-hmm.
我只是不知道该说什么。 Well, I just didn't know what to say, you know.
我想见见你。 Look, I wanted to meet you.
现在你在耍我。你想见我? Now you're goofing on me. You wanted to meet me?
你想什么时候见我都行。我就在电台。 You can meet me anytime you want. I'm right here in the station.
-你在电台? -看在上帝的份上，我不是总统。 - You're at the station? - I'm not the president, for God's sakes.
我就在这里，市中心的演播室里。 I'm right here, downtown, in the studio.
那我就可以下来了?你可以直接下来。 So I could just come down? You could just come down.
——现在?现在好些了吗?——现在。 - Now? Right now? - Now.
-现在是什么意思?-现在。 - What do you mean, right now? - Right now.
我这就下来。我在直播，肯特。 I'll just come down. I'm on the air, Kent.
好吗? Please?
当然,肯特。为什么不呢?下来吧。真的吗? Sure, Kent. Why not? Come on down. Really?
-我很想认识你。快点。-好吧! - I'd love to meet you. Just hurry up. - All right!
我已经演了一半了。第一个小时快结束了…… I'm halfway through the show. We're at the end of the first hour...
在《夜话》节目中有许多激动人心的智慧对话。 of exciting and intellectual conversation here on Night Talk.
别走开。我们现在播报新闻和天气预报。 Don't go a way. We have the news and the weather coming up.
稍后我们将继续《夜话》。 And then we'll be back with more Night Talk.
-巴瑞。——丹。 - Barry. - Dan.
劳拉，打电话告诉保安有个孩子要来。 Laura, call down and tell Security there's a kid coming.
丹，你要什么吗?咖啡吗?茶吗?胰岛素吗? Dan, you want anything? Coffee? Tea? Insulin?
疯子?我们这里都有。 Crack? We have it all right here.
巴瑞，你应该问我你想不想请嘉宾上节目。 Barry, you should ask me if you wanna have a guest on the show.
为什么?因为我是老板，巴瑞。这就是为什么。 Why? 'Cause I'm the boss, Barry. That's why.
丹，我做我的，你做你的，好吗? Dan, I'll do my job, you do yours, okay?
他不会来参加节目了。就是这样。我们骑马的人太多了…… He is not coming on the show. That's it. We have too much riding...
今晚这里发生的事。今晚这里发生了什么? on what's going on here tonight. What's going on here tonight?
如果他们有一分钟觉得你不可靠，那就完了。 If they think for one minute that you're undependable, it's over.
丹，都市波买下了我的节目。好吧? Dan, MetroWave bought my show. All right?
这是我的节目。我想让谁上我的节目。 This is my show. I put who I want on my show.
如果我想让查理·曼森上我的节目，我会让他上的。 If I wanna have Charlie Manson on my show, I'll put him on the show.
或者泰德·邦迪，或者这个。我有请大卫·伯科维茨， Or Ted Bundy-- Or how about this. I have David Berkowitz,
伯纳德·戈茨，约翰·欣克利。 Bernard Goetz, John Hinckley on.
我们有一个关于枪支管制的特别节目。那会怎样呢? We do a special on gun control. How would that be?
还有那个俄克拉荷马州的邮递员杀了14个人，丹? Or how about that postman from Oklahoma who killed 14 people, Dan?
-他杀了他老板。我们请他上节目。 -删掉。 - He killed his boss. We bring him on the show. - Cut.
我们邀请你作为特别嘉宾。出去了。出去了。 We bring you on as a special guest. Out. Out.
我们要让这些人上节目。我们的节目会非常精彩。 We're gonna bring these guys on the show. We'll have a terrific show.
天啊，这太棒了。 Oh, boy, this'll be great.
真有趣，巴瑞，那个杀了老板的邮差。 That's funny stuff, Barry, the mailman who killed his boss.
你看到邮递员今天给我带来什么了吗? Did you see what the mailman brought me today?
嗯? Huh?
我们把一半的疯子都赶到了方圆20英里内 We got half the wackos within 20 miles of this place...
说他们有多想"烧了你的犹太人屁股" saying how much they wanna "burn your Jew ass."
想想吧，巴瑞。坐下来把这些写在纸上所花的时间， Think about that, Barry. The time it takes to sit down and write that on paper,
把它装进信封，舔一舔，送到局里去。 put it in an envelope, lick it, send it to the station.
我办公室里有好多箱这玩意儿。 And I've got boxes of this shit in my office.
这些人非常严肃。 These people are dead serious.
我所建议的是，你只需把它拉回来，就那么一点点。 All I'm suggesting is that you simply pull it back, just for a little bit.
我觉得你有点不自量力了，丹。 I think you're a little out of your depth, Dan.
我觉得是时候了别说了，听我说两分钟! I think it's time-- Just stop talking and listen to me for two minutes!
现在这里没有观众为你加油了。 You don't have an audience in here now to cheer you on.
你今晚想做什么就做什么，巴瑞。玩得开心。搞砸交易。 You do whatever you want to tonight, Barry. Have fun. Blow the deal.
我不会说我不在乎，因为我为此付出了很大努力。 I'm not gonna say I don't care, because I worked very hard on this.
-我为这个拼了命。-你说的可是我的命。 - I worked my ass off on this. - This is my life you're talking about.
不，巴瑞，你就是个大嘴巴的西装推销员。 No, what you are, Barry, is a fucking suit salesman with a big mouth.
让我们有话直说。 Let's call a spade a spade.
这是一份工作。就是这样。 It's a job. That's all it is.
如果你想的话，你可以进来预测世界末日，巴瑞。 You can come in here and start predicting Armageddon if you want to, Barry.
但这仍然是一份工作。 But it's still a job.
一份你根本不知道怎么做的工作… A job you did not even know how to do...
直到我教会了你 until I taught it to you!
你以为你在这里做什么，改变世界吗? What do you think you're doing in here, changing the world?
这是脱口秀，巴瑞，你是脱口秀主持人。 This is a talk show, Barry, and you are a talk show host.
艾伦开车，杰瑞做家务， Alan does the drive time, Jerry does the home handyman stuff,
希拉负责心理医生的事，希德负责财务的事，你负责挂电话。 Sheila does the shrink stuff, Sid does the financial stuff, and you hang up on people.
那是你的工作。 That's your job.
现在，你很擅长这个。你是我牌上的小丑 Now, you're very good at it. You're the joker in my deck,
我为你的成功感到高兴。 and I'm very happy for your success.
但你为我工作! But you work for me!
我是你老板。 I'm your boss.
你想让孩子上节目吗?叫他接电话! You wanna have the kid on the show? Have him on!
但有一件事你得说清楚。你搞砸了我的生意 But you get one thing straight. You fuck up my deal,
然后你就回去卖双层针织西装。 and you go back to selling double-knit suits.
我很高兴你这么认真，巴瑞， I'm glad you take it all so seriously, Barry,
但你得学会什么时候停下来，否则你会死的。 but you gotta learn when to stop or it's gonna kill you.
去找那孩子。生孩子不是个好主意，巴瑞。 Go get the kid. The kid is not a good idea, Barry.
你是站在他那边的，不是吗?不，我想让你想想这节目。 You're on his side, aren't you? No, I want you to think about the show.
你可能会失去你和我为之努力的一切。 You could lose everything that you've worked for and everything I've worked for.
把孩子叫来。 Get the kid.
这对巴瑞很重要。 It's very important to Barry.
这是他一生中非常重要的时刻。 It's a very important moment in his life.
是的，他对我很重要。他很重要。 Yes, he is important to me. He is important.
听着，卢，他是个疯子。 Look, Lou, he's a fuckin' basket case.
卢——好吧，好吧。算了吧。算了吧。 Lou-- All right, all right. Forget it. Forget it.
我今晚就留下来看节目，然后明天就回家，好吗? I'll just stay to see the show tonight, and then I'll be home tomorrow, okay?
爱你。 Love you.
是的。嘿。 Yeah. Hey.
就当我在探望生病的亲戚。 Just pretend I'm visiting a sick relative.
好吧? All right?
再见。 Bye.
是的。 Yeah.
《夜话》。我们回来。这就是巴瑞·尚普兰的精神。 Night Talk. We're back. This is the spirit of Barry Champlaign.
-乔，用你最好的办法打我。-是的，巴瑞。 - Joe, hit me with your best shot. - Yeah, Barry.
我开出租车已经有11年了。 I've been driving a cab now for about 11 years.
我见过各种各样的人。我了解人。我希望我了解。 I've met all kinds. I know people. I wish I did.
让我告诉你，朋友。 Let me tell you something, friend.
刚才打电话来的那个孩子，他需要的是狠狠地揍一顿。 That kid who just called, what he needs is a good bust in the chops.
你觉得这样行吗，乔?那样的孩子需要管教。 Think that would do it, Joe? Kid like that needs some discipline.
纪律吗?我有两个孩子，巴瑞。 Discipline? I got two kids, Barry.
他们要是给我惹麻烦，我就脱下腰带。 They give me any trouble, I just take off my belt.
他们看到腰带，就这样。 They see the belt, that's it.
乔，你的孩子多大了?小女孩五岁，男孩三岁半。 How old are your children, Joe? Little girl's five, boy's three and a half.
你用皮带打他们?刷子，皮带，报纸。无论什么。 You hit them with a belt? Brush, belt, newspaper. Whatever.
嘿，他们要么从我这里得到，要么他们把它清除。 Hey, they're either gonna get it from me or they're gonna get it out there.
乔，我觉得你需要专业的帮助。什么? Joe, I think you need professional help. What's that?
你得和杰瑞在一起。他能压制住他们…… You need to get together with Jerry. He can hold them down...
而你用皮带打他们。你到底在说什么? while you hit them with a belt. What the hell are you talking about?
你在用刷子和皮带打你的孩子。你是精神病。 You're hitting your kids with brushes and belts. You're psychotic.
你是个疯子。是吗?你是什么，朋友，基佬吗? You're a psycho. Yeah? And what are you, friend, a faggot?
从你这种笨蛋嘴里说出来，真是恭维。 Coming from a pinhead like you, that's a complement.
不如我现在就去你的那个车站…… How about I come on down there to that station of yours right now...
然后打烂你的基佬脸? and bust your little faggot face right in?
谁来帮忙，你哥哥吗?不许说我哥哥的事。 Who's gonna help, your brother? You don't say nothin' about my brother.
你哥哥在哈利·海因茨大道附近游荡。是吗?他是个皮条客。 Your brother hangs around Harry Heinz Blvd., doesn't he? He's a pimp.
你妻子是个妓女，对吧?我的妻子吗? And your wife, she's a hooker, isn't she? My wife?
你用什么打她，棒球棒吗? What do you beat her with, a baseball bat?
嗯? Hmm?
我知道你住哪，搭档。 Well, I know where you live, partner.
好吧?我知道你长什么样。 All right? I know what you look like.
嗯哼。做个好梦，亲爱的。 Mm-hmm. Sweet dreams, sweetheart.
我都等不及了。 I can't wait.
文森特，你在《夜话》节目。说点有趣的。 Vincent, you're on Night Talk. Say something interesting.
-是的。呃-是啊。 - Yeah. Uh-- - Yeah.
我听你说了五年了。啊哈。 I've been listening to you for five years. Uh-huh.
是啊，店里的人每晚都让你上节目。 Yup, and the guys down here at the store put you on every night.
是的。我们坐在一起嘲笑你… Yup. And we sit around and laugh at you...
是的。因为你就是个混蛋，而且 Yup. because you're such a jerk-off and--
好吧。《夜话》。艾格尼丝,是的。 Yeah, all right. Night Talk. Agnes, yeah.
巴瑞，我能问你个问题吗?打我。 Barry, can I ask you a question? Hit me.
我无论如何也不会打你，亲爱的。 I wouldn't hit you for the world, sweetheart.
我爱露西。现在，他们为什么不多制造一些呢?什么? I Love Lucy. Now, why don't they make more of them? What?
你想和巴瑞谈什么? What do you want to talk to Barry about?
你想强奸别人? You wanna rape somebody?
你为什么不回家洗个冷水澡呢?那就更好了。 Why don't you go home and take a cold shower. That'd be better.
那些节目都过时了，艾格尼丝。露西尔·鲍尔至少有105岁了。 Those shows are ancient, Agnes. Lucille Ball must be at least 105 years old.
其他演员都死了。不。现在，她还没那么老。 The rest of the cast is dead. No. Now, she's not that old.
我前几天晚上在节目上看到她，她看起来大约35岁。 I saw her on the show the other night, and she looked to be around 35.
还有那个里基·里卡多，他会打手鼓。 And that Ricky Ricardo, boy, can he play the bongos.
没人会这么蠢。你是认真的吗，艾格尼丝?你知道今年是哪一年吗? Nobody can be this stupid. Are you serious, Agnes? You know what year this is?
约翰，你在《夜话》节目。 Yeah, John, you're on Night Talk.
还记得我吗，巴瑞? Remember me, Barry?
我打电话说我在龟溪。 I called and said I was in Turtle Creek.
嗯,我—— Well, I--
从那以后，我强奸了三个女人。 I raped three women since then.
你还记得我吗?我不确定。给我提神，约翰。 Do you remember me? I'm not sure. Refresh me, John.
我在考虑再强奸一个，巴瑞。我今天早上看到她了。 I'm thinking about raping another one, Barry. I saw her this morning.
你在对我做什么，斯图?你这直播简直要我的命了。 What are you doing to me, Stu? You're killing me right here on the air.
-我们能放松点吗?-我强奸的这些女人不会告发我的 - Oh, could we relax, please? - These women I raped aren't turning me in.
如何来吗?告诉我你在哪，约翰， How come? Well, tell me where you are, John,
我会确保你得到帮助的 and I'll make sure you get some help.
我向你保证。我只是厌倦了强奸女人。我—— You have my word on that. I'm just so tired of raping women. I--
我厌倦了强奸女人! I'm so tired or raping women!
我对他们很生气!我对他们很愤怒!约翰。 I-I got rage for them! I got rage for them! John.
你上次强奸女人是什么时候? When was the last time you raped a woman?
几周前在格林镇。 In Green ville a couple weeks ago.
她——她大摇大摆地走来走去…… She was-- She was struttin' around...
好像她是另外一个人。 like she was something else.
我明白，约翰。我同情。 Yeah, I-I understand, John. I sympathize.
我们都会生气。 We all get angry.
强奸到底发生在哪里? Where did the rape actually occur?
就在她车的后座上。 It was in the back seat of her car.
她把车停在Jack in the Box的停车场。 She pulled into the Jack in the Box parking lot.
我插话说:“好吧，我——” I jumped in and said, "Okay, I'm--"
那是晚上的某个时间。我不知道。 It was nighttime, sometime. I don't know.
约翰，你多大了?我40岁。 How old are you, John? I'm 40.
-我在监狱里待了12年。 -你帮我录了吗? I was in the pen 12 years. Are you taping this for me?
-我没有接受治疗。他们什么也没为我做! -让我它连起来。 I didn't get no therapy. They didn't do nothin' for me! Let me hook this up.
他们没有，他们没有，他们都懒得帮我! They didn't-- They didn't-- They didn't bother to help me!
巴瑞，我要强奸别人。我要这么做。但是为什么呢? Barry, I'm gonna rape somebody. I'm gonna do it. But why?
我要!这是一种无法抗拒的冲动。 I gotta! It's an irresistible compulsion.
就像…就像试着戒烟一样。 It's like-- It's like tryin' to quit smoking.
巴瑞，我控制不了自己。 Barry, I can't help myself.
我不能, I can't--
好吧。你有一种无法抗拒的冲动。 Yeah, all right. You have this irresistible compulsion.
约翰，我们上次谈话时 John, the last time we spoke,
你说慢跑对你有帮助。 you said that jogging helped you.
在龟溪上下。 Up and down Turtle Creek.
在龟溪上慢跑。龟溪! Jogging up and down the Turtle Creek. Turtle Creek!
我可以为你给龟溪里所有鸭子的起名字! I could name you every duck in Turtle Creek!
约翰，你决定好下一个要强奸谁了吗? John, have you decided who you're gonna rape next?
我挑中了她，监视她，准备好了。 I got her picked out, staked out and ready.
我一直想要她。 I always wanted her.
你喜欢她哪一点? What is it about her that you like?
一块草莓派和一块南瓜派有什么区别? What is it about a piece of strawberry pie or a piece of pumpkin pie?
我是说，我不知道。她可能是黑人也可能是白人 I mean, I don't know. She could be black or white,
西班牙人，日本人，漂亮，胖，丑。 Hispano, Japanese, pretty, fat, ugly.
我要把她们都强奸了! I wanna rape them all!
好了，约翰，冷静点。我想帮你。我是你的朋友。 All right, John, calm down. I wanna help you. I'm your friend.
你是我哥们吗，巴瑞? Are you my buddy, Barry?
我是你的哥们，约翰。 I'm your buddy, John.
我控制不住自己。我得走了。 I can't help myself. I gotta go do it.
你可以自便。你不会这么做的，约翰。不，我必须这么做。 You can help yourself. You're not gonna do it, John. No, I gotta do it.
不，你不能这么做，约翰。 No, you're not gonna do it, John.
现在，听我说。我要去做了。 Now, listen to me. I'm gonna go do it.
不，不，不。想想你在说什么，约翰。 No, no, no. Think about what you're saying, John.
约翰? John?
他走了。 He's gone.
又一个迷失的灵魂进入达拉斯的夜晚。 Another lost soul goes into the Dallas night.
我们有警方的追踪。 We-We have a police trace on this.
如果有人了解这个人… If anybody knows anything about this man...
或者在龟溪，或者在电话亭看到某人， or is in Turtle Creek or sees someone in a phone booth,
请打电话到KGAB。 please call us here at KGAB.
电话号码是555-TALK。 The number to call is, is 555-TALK.
让我们听听赞助商是怎么说的 Uh, let's hear from our sponsors--
蟑螂伴侣诱饵和白蚁清洁剂。 Pasty Mate Roach and Termite Cleaners.
请仔细聆听。 Listen closely.
蟑螂交配的声音…… The sound of cockroaches mating...
增强500倍。他们无法追踪。 enhanced 500 times. They couldn't trace it.
是啊，我应该让他再等三个小时的。 Right, I should've kept him on for another three hours.
我曾经喝过汉弗瑞的咖啡。 You know, I once had a cup of Humphrey's coffee.
我吐了三个星期的血。 I was spitting blood for three weeks.
你应该试试脱咖啡因的，巴瑞。 You should try the decaffeinated, Barry.
-太棒了。-等等。别告诉我。 - This is great. - Oh, wait. Don't tell me.
他看起来很无害。 He seems pretty harmless.
来吧，孩子，坐下。这是你的椅子。 Come on, kid, sit down. This is your chair.
这是你的麦克风。直接对着它说话。 This is your microphone. Speak directly into it.
嘴巴离它六英寸远。 Keep your mouth about six inches a way from it.
这是你的耳机，这样你就能听到节目了。这些是基本规则。 These are your headphones so you can hear the show. These are the ground rules.
什么?基本规则。 What? The ground rules.
没有姓氏，没有品牌，没有电话号码。 No last names, no brand names, no phone numbers over the air.
除此之外，言行举止要正常。这位是巴瑞·尚普兰先生。 Other than that, act and speak normally. This is Mr. Barry Champlaign.
你巴瑞。 You're Barry.
你抓到他了。好吧。 You got him. All right.
他怎么了?他是追星族。 What's wrong with him? He's starstruck.
嘿，孩子，说点什么。我需要一个等级。检查,检查。检查一个。 Hey, kid, say something. I need a level. Check, check. Check one.
数到五， Here we go on five,
四，三，二，一。-斯图。 - four, three, two, one. - Stu.
系好安全带，婊子。开始吧。 Strap in, bitch. Here we go.
我们回来。我是巴瑞·尚普拉。您正在收听的是《夜话》。 We're back. I'm Barry Champlaign. You're listening to Night Talk.
今晚我们请来了一位非常特别的嘉宾。 We have a very special guest with us tonight.
肯特。肯特，向大家问好。 Kent. Say hello to everybody, Kent.
好吧。 All right.
正是我的感受。 My sentiments exactly.
我们邀请了肯特来一窥美国的未来。 We've brought Kent on board to get an inside look at the future of America.
肯特是典型的美国青年 Kent is the classic American youth--
精力充沛，足智多谋，娇生惯养，乖张乖张。 energetic and resourceful, spoiled, perverse and disturbed.
你觉得这样描述准确吗，肯特?是的,当然。 Would you say that's an accurate description, Kent? Yep, sure.
你管那个发型叫什么?我不知道。摇滚! What do you call that haircut? I don't know. Rock and roll!
你现在嗑药了吗，肯特? Are you high right now, Kent?
我嗑药了吗?你嗑药了吗 Am I high? Are you on drugs,
还是这就是你天生的低能? or is this your naturally moronic self?
注意流口水。你把它弄得整个控制台都是。 Watch the drool. You're getting it all over the console.
真不敢相信我来了，伙计。 I can't believe I'm here, man.
嘿。哇。这东西真的有用吗? Hey. Wow. Does this thing really work?
你正坐在电台里，肯特。 You're sitting in a radio station, Kent.
你正坐在麦克风前。 You're sitting in front of a live mike.
当你说话时，成千上万的人听到你的声音。 When you speak, thousands of people hear your voice.
它渗透他们的思想。 It penetrates their minds.
好吧,好吧。不,听。 Okay, okay. No, listen.
我想把这个送给戴蒙德·戴夫和贝斯手比利… I wanna send that one out to Diamond Dave and Billy the bass player...
还有谷景购物中心的美女们 and all the babes at the Valley View Mall.
我们今晚讨论的是美国，肯特。 We're discussing America here tonight, Kent.
你对这个问题有什么想法吗? Do you have any thoughts on that subject?
是的。哦，对不起。 Yeah. Oh, I'm sorry.
我打断了你的思路。请继续。这是令人振奋的。 I broke your train of thought. Please, keep going. This is exhilarating.
不，我知道。 No, I know.
我又不是不关心政治什么的。你知道，我的意思是 It's not like I'm not political or nothin'. You know, I mean--
我喜欢布鲁斯。他的政治。 I like Bruce. He's political.
布鲁斯·斯普林斯汀，是的。一个非常深刻的政治思想家。 Bruce Springsteen, yes. A very deep, political thinker.
他是共产主义者，不是吗? He's a communist, isn't he?
不，他来自新泽西。 No, he's from New Jersey.
他的前任人很好。嗯哼。谁的前女友? His ex is pretty nice. Mm-hmm. Whose ex?
布鲁斯的。布鲁斯·斯普林斯汀的妻子。是的，她怎么了? Bruce's. Bruce Springsteen's wife. Yes, what about her?
瑞利安。嗨,瑞利安。 Julienne. Hi, Julienne.
她是个模特。你知道吗，巴仔? She was a model. You know that, Bar?
他们都有模特，巴仔。 All those guys got models, Bar.
米克和杰瑞，基思和帕蒂， I mean, Mick and Jerry, Keith and Patty,
王子, Prince and--
王子。 Prince.
你知道，巴仔, 太好了。 You know, Bar, Bingo.
模特只和她们认为最酷的男人在一起。 models only hang around with guys they think are coolest.
看看你，伙计。你是个大人物，还是个大明星。 Look at you, man. You're a big guy, famous star and all.
我是说，你那边有个为你工作的… I mean, you got that fine babe right over there...
漂亮的宝贝，伙计。 who works for you, man.
所以，如果你有现金，而且你很酷， So hey, if you got some cash and you're cool,
你要有一个模特女友。 you get to have a model.
所以你不会称自己为女性自由主义者，肯特? So you wouldn't call yourself a women's libber then, Kent, huh?
是的，我会的，巴仔。我是说，每个人都被解放了。 Yeah, I would, Bar. I mean, everybody being liberated, you know.
女人，南非人，诸如此类的人，你知道。 Women, South Africans, all those kind of people, you know.
我看过一个 I saw a show about all that stuff--
关于革命是多么重要的节目。 about how revolution's a pretty important thing.
我们会有更多的革命，人们聚在一起， We're gonna have a lot more revolutions where people get together,
团结，还有 solidarity and that and--
就像Megadeath的那首歌。 You know, like that song by Megadeath.
♪和平出售，但谁来买呢 ♪ Peace sells but who's buying ♪
♬和平会卖，但谁会买♬-啊，拜托! - ♪ Peace sells but who's buying ♪ - Ah, come on!
还有，我看了另一节目… Hey, plus-- Oh, I saw this other show...
未来他们将如何拥有双向电视机。 about how in the future they're gonna have these two-way TV sets.
人们将能够看到彼此和一切。 People will be able to see each other and everything.
然后，他们就没办法阻止这场革命了。 And then there's, like, no way they're gonna be able to stop the revolution.
谁能阻止得了呢，肯特? Who won't be able to stop it, Kent?
大佬，政府，公司。 Big Brother, the government, corporations.
他们是一群法西斯分子。他们想控制每个人的思想。 They're a bunch of fascists. They wanna control everybody's mind.
但是，自由很重要， But, hey, freedom's an important thing,
就像你常说的，巴仔。 just like you always say, Bar.
你说得真好，巴仔。 You say the best things, Bar.
我一直在听你说话。 I listen to you all the time.
你太棒了。肯特，你是个白痴。 You're great. Kent, you're an idiot.
我真诚地希望你不代表这个国家的未来， I sincerely hope you do not represent the future of this country,
因为如果你这么做，我们就惨了。 because if you do we are in sad shape.
老兄，你太搞笑了。 Bar, man, you're so funny, man.
这就是为什么我喜欢听你的节目。所以孩子们都听你的，伙计。 That's why I love to listen to your show. That's why all the kids listen to you, man.
而且，这些打手把你推来推去。 Plus, these goons push you around, you know.
所有的孩子都听你的，巴仔。 All the kids listen to you, Bar.
你是电台里最棒的! You are the best thing on the radio!
肯特，我们在节目里讨论了很多严肃的话题 Kent, we discuss a lot of serious subjects on this show--
悲伤的事情，可怕的事情，不幸的事情。 sad things, frightening things, tragic things.
这些你都不介意吗? Doesn't any of that bother you?
不。 Nope.
为什么不呢? Why not?
这只是一场表演。这可是个大摇滚视频啊，肯特? It's just a show. It's one big rock video, huh, Kent?
是啊! Yeah!
不。来吧，巴仔。 No. Come on, Bar.
这是你的节目。 It's your show.
是的，就是这样，就是这样。这是我的节目。 Yeah, that it is, that it is. It's my show.
让我们回到我节目上的来电者。 Let's go back to the callers on my show.
茱莉亚，你在《夜话》节目。 Uh, Julia, you're on Night Talk.
巴瑞,你好。亲爱的，你知道， Barry, hello. Now, you know, darlin',
我想今晚给你打电话的人… I think these people who've been callin' you tonight...
是一群我不知道是什么。 are a bunch of I don't know what's.
这太疯狂了。还有你那疯狂的孩子，太可怕了。 It's crazy. And that crazy kid you got on there, now, that's terrible.
我已经连续听你的节目五年了，巴瑞 I've been listenin' to your show for five years straight, Barry,
我喜欢你和你的节目 and I love you and your show.
我觉得会有更多的人来听，这很棒。 I think it's terrific that more folks are gonna be listenin'.
我只是希望你有时间陪你的老朋友，巴仔。 I just hope you have time for your longtime friends there, Bar.
我总是有时间陪朋友的，茱莉亚。 I always have time for my friends, Julia.
你太棒了。 Aw, you're terrific.
你的节目太棒了。我不知道还能说什么。 Your show's terrific. I don't know what else to say.
告诉我吧，茱莉亚，既然你一直都在听。 Well, tell me something, Julia, since you listen all the time.
你喜欢这节目的哪一点? What is it you like about the show?
嗯，我不知道。 Well, I don't know.
很多事情。 A lot of things.
嗯，比如说，什么?我爱你，巴仔。 Well, what, for instance? Well, I love you, Bar.
啊哈，这是肯定的。好吧，你爱我哪一点? Uh-huh, that's a given. Okay, what about me do you love?
你很有趣。啊哈。 Well, you're very funny. Uh-huh.
我喜欢听你说那些你想说的话。 And I love to hear you talk about all the things you have to say.
是的，是的，好的。让我们回到节目中。 Yeah, yeah, okay. Let's get back to the show.
这个节目对你来说一定有某种目的。 The show must serve some kind of purpose for you.
好吧，现在，我不会这么说。你会怎么说? Well, now, I wouldn't say that. What would you say?
嗯，我不知道。你不知道是什么意思? Well, I don't know. What do you mean, you don't know?
你已经说了至少五次了。你不知道什么? You said that at least five times already. What don't you know?
你已经听这个节目五年了。你不知道为什么要听吗? You've been listening to this show for five years. You don't know why you listen to it?
我刚才说，我听到你刚才说的话了。 Well, I just said-- I heard what you just said.
你说你不知道为什么要听这个节目。我来告诉你原因吧。 You said you don't know why you listen to this show. Why don't I tell you why.
你听是为了让自己比其他打电话来的失败者更有优越感! You listen so that you can feel superior to the other losers who call in!
巴瑞!别叫我巴瑞! Barry! Don't "Barry" me!
你耳朵里是木屑，而不是脑子。听你说! You've got sawdust between your ears instead of brains. Just listen to you!
如果我听起来像你这么蠢，我就不好意思开口了! If I sounded as stupid as you, I'd be too embarrassed to open my mouth!
-我要挂了!-很好，别再打了。 - I'm hanging up! - Good, and don't call back.
没有什么比爱你的人更无聊的了。 Nothing more boring than people who love you.
是的，你在《夜话》节目。 Yeah, you're on Night Talk.
我只有一件事要问你，巴瑞。 I just have one thing to ask you, Barry.
打我。 Hit me.
-你真的像听起来那么丑吗? -更丑。 - Are you as ugly-looking as you sound? - Uglier.
是啊，我就知道你会这么说。 Yeah, I thought you'd say something like that.
但是像往常一样，你的问题是无效的。 But as usual, you a void the question.
问题是什么?我想你知道这个问题。 What's the question? I think you know the question.
-动物是植物还是矿物? -问题很明显。 - Is an animal a vegetable or a mineral? - The question is obvious.
为什么像你这样聪明的人… Why does an intelligent fellow like yourself...
花这么多精力伤害别人? spend so much energy hurting other people?
嗯?你不爱自己吗? Hmm? Do you not love yourself?
我觉得你很孤独，巴瑞。 I think you're very lonely, Barry.
我为你难过，因为你不知道如何去爱。 I'm sorry for you, because you don't know how to love.
《夜话》。拉尔夫。 Night Talk. Ralph.
他们总是这么说，不是吗? They always say that, don't they?
“你为什么这么生气?” "Why are you so angry"?
他们不理解我和你，巴瑞。 Well, they don't understand me and you, Barry.
我们是那种，感觉太多的人。 We're the kind of people, we feel too much.
是吗，拉尔夫? Are we, Ralph?
是的，我叫谢丽尔·安。我要在线。 Yeah, my name is Cheryl Ann. I'll hold.
谁知道呢?我的意思是，以癌症为例。 Who knows? I mean, take, for instance, cancer.
癌症是什么?你在做什么，艾伦 What is cancer? What are you doing, Ellen?
他孤身一人在外面。那又怎样? He's all alone out there. So what?
他要完蛋了，丹。 He's going down in flames, Dan.
这是巴瑞的节目，艾伦 It's Barry's show, Ellen.
让巴瑞做巴瑞的表演。 Let Barry do Barry's show.
他们要拿我的电视机做什么? Well, what are they gonna do with my TV set?
我们看。人们对电视机就是这么做的。 We watch it. That's what people do with TV sets.
他们看到了什么?他们看到人们杀人，婴儿挨饿，洪水泛滥。 What do they see? They see people killing people, babies starving, floods.
为了什么?免费! And for what? For nothing!
对于啤酒广告和丹碧丝广告， For beer commercials and Tampax ads,
MTV，游艇，大海， MTV, a yacht, the ocean,
钻石耳环，赛马。 a diamond earring, a racehorse.
嗯，我想是的。 Well, I guess so.
我想是的。我都是在报纸上看到的。 I guess so. All I know is what I read in the papers.
这是很多的讨论。巴瑞，只是说说而已。说，说，说。 And that's a lot of talk. Barry, it's talk. Talk, talk, talk.
说，说，说，说，说，说，说，说，说!拉尔夫，拉尔夫，拉尔夫! Talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk! Ralph, Ralph, Ralph!
告诉我。我很好奇。 Tell me something. I'm curious.
你穿着紧身衣怎么打电话? How do you dial a phone with a straightjacket on?
巴瑞。 Barry.
我不太了解上帝，也不太信教， I don't know much about God and I never was very religious,
但你总忍不住觉得不对劲， but you can't help feeling like something is wrong,
就像没有人在驾驶火车 like nobody's driving the train,
这个系统, the system,
因为太多的人生病了。 'cause too many people are gettin' sick.
交通也很堵。 And the traffic, it's just jamming up.
甚至最近的天气也不太好。 And even the weather, not so good lately.
巴瑞，我只是，我不明白，巴瑞。我就是不明白。 Barry, I just don't-- I don't get it, Barry. I just don't get it.
你还不明白吗，胆小鬼?这就是你得到的!你得到1.59美元， You don't get it, wimp? Here's what you get! You get $1.59,
-就是这样。-去药店买一包剃须刀片 - That's it. - go down to the drugstore, buy a pack of razor blades,
割破你的手腕，蠢货! and slash your fuckin' wrists, pinhead!
就是这样，孩子。来吧。 That's it, kid. Come on.
-什么? -把他弄出去，马上! - What? - Get him out of here, now!
嘿,巴瑞! Hey, Barry!
放开我，你个狗娘养的! Get the fuck off me, you fuckin' son of a bitch!
谢谢你，达拉斯!晚安! Thank you, Dallas! Good night!
你没事吧，巴瑞?站在。 You all right, Barry? Stand by.
我很困惑，巴瑞。 I'm confused, Barry.
你说你叫什么名字? What did you say your name was?
谢丽尔安。 Cheryl Ann.
是关于我前夫的。 It's about my ex-husband.
他回来了，我有段时间没见他了。 He's back in town and, well, I haven't seen him for a while.
你在困惑什么，谢丽尔·安? What are you confused about, Cheryl Ann?
嗯，让我先说…… Well, let me first say...
我离开前夫是有充分理由的 that I left my ex-husband for very good reasons.
是不是，我们别谈了，好吗? Did it-- Let's not get into them, okay?
他一点也不完美。 And he's anything but perfect.
他抽烟，喝酒，还爱吵架。 He smokes, he drinks, he loves to argue.
-听起来像是我喜欢的类型。-是的。 - Sounds like my kind of guy. - Yeah.
他有点像你。 He is a little bit like you.
是啊，我们得往前走了，谢丽尔·安。 Yeah, well, we gotta move it along here, Cheryl Ann.
你想说重点吗? You wanna get to the point?
我对他有感觉。 I have, um, feelings for him.
什么样的感觉? What kind of feelings?
不错的感觉。 Nice feelings.
嗯—— Um--
这很难说。 This is hard to say.
性的感觉? Sexual feelings?
不仅如此。我是说，是的，当然，但是… It's not just that. I mean, yes, of course, but...
我仍然爱他。 I still love him.
和我丈夫不一样。 It's not the same with my husband.
我们有一些东西， We had something,
和…我要找他。 and... I want him.
我要他进入我的身体。 I want him inside of me.
我想照顾他。 I want to take care of him.
我想和他在一起。 I want to be with him.
你想靠近他。 You wanna be close to him.
是的。 Yes.
你想抱抱他。 You wanna hold him.
哦,是的。 Oh, yes.
你想重温你们俩曾经的感觉。 You wanna relive the feelings you two had.
是的,巴瑞。 Yes, Barry.
你不爱你的丈夫? You don't love your husband?
不。嗯,我—— No. Well, I--
告诉他你爱他。 You tell him that you love him.
你骗他，告诉他你爱他。 You lie to him and you tell him that you love him.
我确实爱他。 I do love him.
我像爱朋友一样爱他。 I love him as a friend.
朋友 Friend.
每个人都是你的朋友。 Everyone's your friend.
不像我前夫。 Not like my ex-husband.
有一种对他灵魂的激情 There's a passion there for his soul and--
我以为我想过简单的生活，但我错了。 I-I thought I wanted a simple life, but I-I was wrong.
我想要回以前的生活。 I want my old life back.
听起来你犯了个错误。 Sounds like you made a mistake.
我应该坚持用第一个人。 Should've stuck with the first guy.
是啊，那我该怎么办? Yeah, well, what was I supposed to do?
我爱你，巴瑞。 I love you, Barry.
听说过一只小狗嘴里叼着一根骨头的故事吗? Ever hear the story of the little dog who had a bone in his mouth?
他小跑过这座桥，他看了看…… And he's trotting over this bridge and he looks over...
看见自己在水中的倒影。 and sees his reflection in the water.
以为是另一只狗。 Thinks it's another dog.
那只狗嘴里也有一根骨头。 That dog has a bone in his mouth too.
狗想要两根骨头，所以他对水里的小狗叫， The dog wants both bones, so he barks at the little dog in the water,
想吓吓他。 trying to scare him.
骨头从他嘴里掉了出来。 Bone drops out of his mouth.
失去两根骨头。 Loses both bones.
这和我刚才说的有什么关系? What has that got to do with what I just said?
宝贝，我不知道该怎么跟你说。 Babe, I don't know what to tell you.
你搞砸了! You blew it!
像你这样的女人永远不会幸福。 You know, women like you are never happy.
你想让我说什么?离开你丈夫?回到前任身边? What do you want me to say? Leave your husband? Go back to your ex?
你的前任不想要你。 Your ex doesn't want you.
他到处都有女人。他不需要你。 He's got women all over the place. He doesn't need you.
他不像你丈夫那样是郊区的僵尸。他在外面找乐子。 He's not some suburban zombie like your husband. He's out there having fun.
你想过吗?也许你前夫不想要你? Did you ever think of that? Maybe your ex-husband doesn't want you?
嗯?他来找我的。他说他想要我。 Hmm? He came on to me. He said he wanted me.
你又在说谎。他说他还爱我。 You're lying again. He said he still loved me.
你在撒谎!你是个生活在梦幻世界里的性不满足的女人! You're lying! You're a sexually unsatisfied woman living in a dream world!
我为你感到难过! I feel sorry for you!
所以你还是继续跟着美国先生吧， So why don't you stick with Mr. America there,
出去给自己买个强力振动棒，让自己爽翻。 go out and buy yourself a heavy-duty vibrator, and knock yourself out.
一分耕耘一分收获。 We reap what we sow.
跟我来，谢丽尔·安? Follow me, Cheryl Ann?
可能是寒冷的。特蕾莎在线上。 Probably frigid. And we have Theresa on the line.
你总有一天会成功的，巴瑞。 The day will come for you, Barry.
到时候会有报应的， And there will be a reckoning,
一个加法和一个总计。 an adding up and a totaling.
开辟道路的人将遭到背叛。 Those who turned a way will be turned upon.
我不管你的故事是什么，巴瑞。 And I don't care what your story is, Barry.
你是有责任的，你的审判不会出现混乱。 You are responsible, and there will be no confusion at your trial.
它会很短，脖子会断裂。 It will be short, and necks will crack.
鞭子会把你的背剥得只剩骨头， The whips will strip your back bare to the bone,
你的孩子会为你哭泣…… and your children will cry for you...
他们在你眼前被屠杀。 as they are slaughtered before your eyes.
你—— You--
犹太人会高高挂在街上。 The Jews will hang high over the streets.
你必被埋在坟堆里。 You will be buried in piles.
你自己挖洞。 You dig your own holes.
我在这里只是告诉你，这一天会到来。 I am here merely to tell you that the day will come.
它将。 It will.
信不信由你，我觉得你很有道理。 Believe it or not, you make perfect sense to me.
我应该被绞死。 I should hang.
我是个伪君子。 I'm a hypocrite.
我要求真诚，我撒谎。 I ask for sincerity, and I lie.
我一边谴责这个制度，一边拥护它。 I denounce the system as I embrace it.
我想要金钱、权力和威望。 I want money and power and prestige.
我想要收视率和成功。 I want ratings and success.
我才不在乎你和这个世界。这是事实。 I don't give a damn about you or the world. That's the truth.
对于这件事，我可以说对不起，但我不会。我为什么要这么做? For this, I could say I'm sorry, but I won't. Why should I?
我是说，你们到底是谁，你们这些观众? I mean, who the hell are you anyways, you audience?
你每天晚上都像一群狼一样盯着我， You're on me every night like a pack of wolves,
因为你无法面对你的本性和你的成就。 'cause you can't stand facing what you are and what you've made.
是的，这个世界是个可怕的地方。 Yes, the world is a terrible place.
是的，癌症和垃圾处理机会害了你。 Yes, cancer and garbage disposals will get you.
是的，一场战争即将来临。 Yes, a war is coming.
是的，世界被射到地狱，你们都死定了。 Yes, the world is shot to hell, and you're all goners.
一切都搞砸了，你喜欢这样，不是吗? Everything's screwed up, and you like it that way, don't you?
你被血腥的细节所吸引。 You're fascinated by the gory details.
你被自己的恐惧所迷惑。 You're mesmerized by your own fear.
你沉迷于洪水，车祸。 You revel in floods, car accidents.
不可阻挡的疾病。 Unstoppable diseases.
别人痛苦的时候，你最快乐。 You're happiest when others are in pain.
这就是我的用武之地，不是吗? That's where I come in, isn't it?
我在这里牵着你的手穿过…… I'm here to lead you by the hands through the dark forest...
你自己的仇恨、愤怒和羞辱的黑暗森林。 of your own hatred and anger and humiliation.
我在提供公共服务。 I'm providing a public service.
你太害怕了。 You're so scared.
你就像被窝里的小孩。 You're like a little child under the covers.
你害怕妖怪，但没有他你活不下去。 You're afraid of the bogeyman, but you can't live without him.
你们的恐惧，你们自己的生活，都成了你们的娱乐。 Your fear, your own lives, have become your entertainment.
下个月，数百万人将会收听这个节目， Next month, millions of people are gonna be listening to this show,
你就没什么可说的了! and you'll have nothing to talk about!
我们拥有非凡的技术。 Marvelous technology is at our disposal.
我们不是要攀上新高度，而是要看看我们能往下走多远。 Instead of reaching up to new heights, we're gonna see how far down we can go.
我们能让自己陷得多深。 How deep into the muck we can immerse ourselves.
你想谈什么呢? What do you wanna talk about, hmm?
棒球成绩吗? Baseball scores?
你的宠物吗? Your pet?
性高潮? Orgasms?
你是可怜的。 You're pathetic.
我鄙视你们每一个人。 I despise each and every one of you.
你什么都没有， You got nothing,
绝对没有。 absolutely nothing.
没有头脑，没有力量，就没有未来。 No brains, no power, no future.
没有希望。 No hope.
没有神。 No God.
你唯一相信的就是我。 The only thing you believe in is me.
如果没有我，你算什么? What are you if you don't have me?
我不害怕，明白吗? I'm not afraid, see?
我每天晚上都来，阐述我的观点，说出我的信仰! I come in every night, make my case, make my point, say what I believe in!
我告诉你你是什么。我必须这么做。我别无选择。 I tell you what you are. I have to. I have no choice.
你吓到我了。 You frighten me.
我每天晚上都来这里，撕扯你，辱骂你，侮辱你， I come here every night, tear into you, I abuse you, I insult you,
而你只是不断地回来要更多。 and you just keep coming back for more.
你怎么了?你为什么一直打电话? What's wrong with you? Why do you keep calling?
我不想再听了。停止说话! I don't wanna hear it anymore. Stop talking!
走开! Go away!
你们是一群懦夫，没骨气，偏执， You're a bunch of yellow-bellied, spineless, bigoted,
颤抖，醉酒，失眠， quivering, drunken, insomniatic,
偏执，恶心，变态，偷窥狂，下流的电话狂。 paranoid, disgusting, perverted, voyeuristic, little obscene phone callers.
这就是你。 That's what you are.
让你见鬼去吧。 Well, to hell with you.
我不需要你的恐惧和愚蠢。你不明白。 I don't need your fear and your stupidity. You don't get it.
在你身上是浪费。 It's wasted on you.
对牛弹琴。 Burros before swine.
如果有人知道… If one person out there had any idea...
我在说什么—— of what I'm talking about--
弗雷德，你在《夜话》节目。 Fred, you're on Night Talk.
是的。你看，巴瑞， Yes. You see, Barry,
我知道这么多人不明白你只是在开玩笑，这很令人沮丧。 I know it's depressing that so many people don't understand you're just joking.
杰基，你在《夜话》节目。 Jackie, you're on Night Talk.
你好。我听了这么多年，我发现你是个温暖而聪明的 Hello. I've been listening for years, and I find you a warm and intelligent--
阿诺。 Arnold.
你之前说的孤独，我是个电气工程师 What you were saying before about loneliness, I'm an electrical engineer--
露西。我妈妈来自韦科，她想知道你是否上过高中 Lucy. My mother is from Waco and wants to know if you went to high school--
拉里。为什么人们坚持称同性恋为正常? Larry. Why do people insist on calling homosexuals normal?
拉尔夫!我在我的房子里。 Ralph! I'm in my house.
我在家， I'm at home,
你就该待在那里，巴瑞 which is where you should be, Barry.
嘿，我就在不远处。如果你愿意，你可以过来。 Hey, I'm not far a way. You could come over if you want.
我们是一类人。 We're the same kind of people.
我有啤酒，汤。 I have beer, soup.
我在这里。 I'm here.
待会儿过来。 Come over later.
我将等待。 I'll wait.
巴瑞，节目还剩60秒。 Barry, there's 60 seconds left in the show.
这是空谈，巴瑞。 This is dead air, Barry.
停播时间。 Dead air.
我想我们被困在一起了。 I guess we're stuck with each other.
我是巴瑞·尚普拉。 This is Barry Champlaign.
巴瑞。 Barry.
太棒了。我感觉很好。 That was great. I feel very good about this.
我去找律师谈谈，我们马上就开始谈这笔交易。 I'm gonna talk to the lawyers, and we'll get started on this deal right away.
我们以后会经常见面的。 We're gonna be seeing a lot more of each other.
我会和你保持联系。 I'll be in touch.
巴瑞。 Barry.
太棒了。 That was great.
你成功了。老尚，祝贺你。 You pulled it off, champ. Congratulations.
明天见。 I'll see you tomorrow.
丹。 Dan.
如果我明晚不来呢? What if I don't come in tomorrow night?
你明天来，巴瑞。 You'll come in tomorrow, Barry.
你总是这样。 You always do.
-她走了? -是的。我不怪她。 - She left, huh? - Yep. I don't blame her.
她最好的台词是，“巴瑞尚普拉是一个值得参观的好地方， Her best line was, "Barry Champlaign's a nice place to visit,
但我不想住在那里。” but I wouldn't want to live there."
这节目完了，斯图。 The show's a washout, Stu.
饶了我吧，行吗?我们要走向全国了，伙计。 Give me a break, will you? We're going national, man.
再说，这也没那么重要。这只是一个节目。 Besides, it's not that important. It's just one show.
如果没那么重要，我为什么要做?我不知道，巴瑞。 If it's not that important, why am I doing it? I don't know, Barry.
你不喜欢高处，就别去爬山。 You don't like the heights, don't climb the mountains.
你懂我的意思吗?就像刚才那个孩子说的 You know what I mean? It's like that kid just said:
“伙计，这是你的节目。” "Man, this is your show."
你要去哪里? Where you headed?
我不知道。去艾伦的酒店，试着谈谈。 I don't know. Go to Ellen's hotel, try to talk.
这很好。明天,巴瑞。 That's good. Tomorrow, Barry.
在我接今晚第一个电话之前， Before I take the first caller this evening,
明天,斯图。我想评论一下我在去电台停车场…… Tomorrow, Stu. I'd like to comment on something I saw...
途中看到的一些事情。 in the parking lot on the way into the station.
有个人站在那里，送你上车? There was a man standing there, Walk you to your car?
显然是精神失常。 obviously mentally disturbed.
这让我想起了一些我们不常谈论的事情。 It made me think about something we don't often talk about.
想去吃个汉堡，聊聊吗? Wanna grab a burger, just talk?
我对你来说太老了，劳拉。 I'm too old for you, Laura.
噢。 Ow.
我是说，你不了解越南， I mean, you don't know about Vietnam,
《逍遥骑士》，披头士乐队。 Easy Rider, Beatles.
重新开始，爷爷。 Start over, Grandpa.
我不能。 I can't.
我在里面。 I'm inside this thing.
你不是。 You're not.
你知道我最害怕什么吗? You know what my greatest fear is?
被无聊。 Being boring.
你并不无聊。 You're not boring.
我担心所有的观众都会起身离开。 I'm afraid that the whole audience is gonna get up and leave.
我有时会对爱情的事情感到困惑。 I get confused sometimes about this love stuff.
我不知道人们说他们恋爱了是什么意思， I don't know what people mean when they say that they're in love,
但是—— but--
但我知道我不认为你是所谓的坏人。 but I do know that I don't think you're the bad guy you think you are.
是的，我是。 Yes, I am.
那汉堡改天再吃吧。 I'll take a rain check on that burger.
对不起，巴瑞。巴瑞。尚普拉先生。 Excuse me, Barry. Barry. Mr. Champlaign.
我不想打扰你。你能给我签个名吗? I hate to bother you. Do you think you could give me an autograph, please?
今晚有节目。确定。 Some show tonight. Sure.
你说你叫什么名字?你死定了，混蛋。 What'd you say your name was? You're dead, fucker.
你来到这里， You come on down to these parts,
你开始对别人指手画脚，侮辱他们的种族， you start telling people their business and insulting their race,
我现在就告诉你，你会落得和尚普拉一样的下场。 you end up like Champlaign, I'll tell you that right now.
他被杀那晚，我听了他的节目。 I listened to his show the night that he was killed.
有个吸毒的孩子在骚扰他。 There was this drug-crazed kid bothering him.
人们一抽那种毒品，就会发疯，你知道吗? When people smoke that crack stuff, they go berserk, you know?
我希望他们能抓到那个孩子。 I hope they catch that kid.
但他们应该听听那个节目。他在直播。 But they ought to listen to that show. He was on the air.
我没想到他会中枪什么的， I didn't think he was gonna get shot or anything,
但那个节目很奇怪。 but that show was strange.
我是说，我得在最后一天上他的节目。那是他的最后一场节目。 I mean, I got to be on his show the last day. That was his last show.
我觉得我的整个人生都变了? I feel kinda like my whole life is different, you know?
好像我很幸运。 Like I'm kinda blessed.
但就像我跟巴瑞说的，我是说， But like I told Barry, you know, I mean, hey,
人生就像是上帝举办的一场盛大的派对， life is kinda just like a big party thrown by God,
我是新的演讲会主席，巴仔 and I'm the new toastmaster, Bar.
就像巴瑞常说的， Like Barry always said,
如果你不喜欢他，就把他关掉。 if you didn't like him, turn him off.
但他们没必要杀了他。 But they didn't have to kill him.
我觉得那个参加节目的小男孩，我觉得他做到了。 I think that young boy that had come in on the show, I think he did it.
我来告诉你我的感受。 I'll tell you how I feel about it.
我觉得如果你偷东西，他们应该把你的手砍下来。 I think if you steal something, they oughta cut your hands off.
如果你强奸了别人，他们应该把你的那个东西切下来。 If you rape somebody, they oughta cut your you-know-what off.
我从没给他打过电话。 I never called him.
现在我很抱歉。 And now I'm sorry.
他甚至都没挂我电话。 He never even hung up on me.
我想念他。你知道当你手臂上打了石膏… I miss him. You know how when you have a cast on your arm...
他们把它剪掉了，你怀念它吗? and they cut it off, you miss having it?
他就像我胳膊上的石膏。我想念他。 He was like a cast on my arm. I miss him.
他就像加了新鲜山核桃的热奶油圣代。 He was like a hot-fudge sundae with fresh pecans.
现在，我知道我不该听他的，因为他总是让我…… Now, I knew I shouldn't listen to him 'cause he always got me...
我气得差点把收音机摔了。 so dog-dang riled up till I was like to smash my radio.
他曾经做过一个关于厕纸怎么卷的节目。 He did a whole show once on which way to roll your toilet paper.
过量还是不足?人们的反应持续了几个小时。 Over or under? People responded for hours.
有些人气得挂了电话。 Some got so angry, they hung up.
我几乎每晚都打电话。我爱巴瑞。 I called almost every night. I loved Barry.
不过他不太喜欢接电话的那个人。 Didn't care much for the fellow who answered the phone, though.
他总是忘了我在等电话。 You know, he always forgot I was waiting on the line.
我不是听说他和他妻子有点矛盾吗? Didn't I read he was having some kind of problem with his wife?
是的，他麻木不仁，又讨厌， Yes, he was insensitive and nasty,
但在电台里，他是一个强壮、阳刚的存在。 but he was a strong, masculine presence on the radio.
为什么会有人做这种事? Why would anyone do such a thing?
上帝的天堂里又多了一颗明亮的星星。 Oh, well, there's another bright star in God's heaven.
我的观点是，你不能像他那样…… My view is that you don't give a group like the neo-Nazis...
让新纳粹分子这样的人进入呼吸道。 access to the airways like he did.
基本上，我无法忍受巴瑞·尚普拉。 Basically, I couldn't stand Barry Champlaign.
我爱上了他的声音。我爱上了他的声音。 I was in love with his voice. I was in love with his voice.
他爱上了自己的声音。 He was in love with his own voice.
我的第一个想法是，我不敢相信有人会那么恨他。 My first thought was that I couldn't believe anyone could hate him that much.
不同意或不喜欢他，但不是恨他。不是杀了他。 Disagree or dislike, but not hate him. Not kill him.
我的第二个想法是…… My second thought was...
以至于他总是怀疑是否有上帝存在。 that he always wondered if there was a God.
巴瑞说他得等到证据到手。 Barry said he had to wait until the evidence was in.
现在你知道了，巴瑞。 Now you know, Barry.
现在你知道了。 Now you know.
现在，我们知道，无论法律说什么，它都是对法律之下的人说的…… Now, we know that whatever the law says, it speaks to those under the law...
这样每个人的嘴都可以被堵住…… so that every mouth may be stopped...
叫普天下都可以在神面前问责。 and the whole world may be held accountable to God.
这个世界疯了，疯了! The world is crazy, crazy!
巴瑞很粗鲁，但他也很有趣。 Barry was rude, but he was a funny guy too.
我打电话的时候他侮辱了我妈妈， He insulted my mother when I called,
但这就是我们有言论自由的原因。 but this is why we have freedom of speech.
我希望当他们记得巴瑞时， I hope that when they remember Barry,
他们记得他说过的话…… they remember what he said...
而不是他说话的风格。 and not the style in which he said it.
这是因果报应。 It was karmic.
你就是不能产生那么多坏业力…… You just can't put out that much bad karma...
而不会反过来伤害你。 without it coming back at you.
巴瑞和我一起工作了七年多。 Barry and I worked together for over seven years.
只要你在广播中威胁他，他就会狠狠地回击你。 Whenever you threatened him over the air, man, he'd stick it right back in your face.
就像他的鸡鸡在翅膀上扇动…… It was like his dick was flapping in the wing...
他想看看自己能不能勃起。 and he liked to see if he could get an erection.
那家伙有个小弟弟，但他喜欢把它甩出来。 The guy had a little dick, but he liked to flap it out there.
然后他们把它剪掉。现在他死了。 Then they cut if off. Now he's dead.
我不知道你是否理解这个比喻， I don't know if you understand that analogy,
我是说，我得在最后一天上他的节目。那是他的最后一场。 I mean, I got to be on his show the last day. That was his last show.