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Hello.
Can I make a call if I may?
To the United States, América?
Lines...
-no calls. -I was thinking...
possibly if there's any way to...
-hook that up? -First cabin.
How do you do? You've reached the office of George Gorton.
Tell me everything.
Hi, this is me, George Gorton.
I'm here in Moscow, Russia.
It's June 16th 1996...
about 4PM my time. The reason I'm calling is...
I may be killed today, or disappear...
in which case I want the police to know what happened.
We start where we always start. 6 bullet points for Wilson's speech.
What we're looking for is a magic number...
one tiny positive digit that we can spin in our favor...
and make this funeral look like a birthday party.
Trust me, it's gonna take a little bit of creative analysis.
But, in the immortal words of George Herbert Bush...
-nobody said it was gonna be easy... -Nobody was right.
Very good!
We don't want the goddamn poll tomorrow...
we want it yesterday, which means we better get it today...
or else I'm gonna fly up there and rip your goddamn windpipe!
-Dick. -Listen, Dwayne.
Dwayne, I know it's a mock election.
I don't care. We gotta win, place or at least show, okay?
What do you mean you don't have any voters?
Round up some hicks in Nebraska, bring them to Iowa...
and pay them to vote for Wilson!
They're pig farmers. Doesn't have to be kosher.
Oh my gosh. Look who it is. To what do I owe?
We must be doing something right, uh?
I don't think so, George. Your guys got no votes...
no funds and zero party support.
Off the record...
do you really think you can turn it around?
Off the record? Okay, here's how we do it.
Pay attention now. Secrets of the trade.
Put your right hand in, put your right hand out...
put your right hand in, shake it all about...
Next part is crucial. Do the...
No. That's what it's all about. We're gonna turn it around.
You're never off the record, are you?
Like you are?
Hey, dinner tonight at eight?
How does that sound? We can talk.
What do you think? Really. Hello.
Governor!
Yeah, hang on a second.
Let me go someplace quiet.
Of course, as long as it's for the good of the campaign.
No.
I'm sure you're making the right decision.
Let me guess. Good news.
He wants me to bend over to Fuller.
''I feel I have to have national presence, George.
Fuller's better positioned for it than you are.''
Better positioned?
You've given him 20 years of your life.
I mean, he'd be the governor of Bumfuck without you.
This is my early Christmas bonus.
He doesn't trust me to run a presidential campaign.
Look, George, we're a team. You go, we go.
No, you guys stay here. 'Cause a paycheck's a paycheck.
You know, it's a Titanic. Wilson doesn't stand a rat's chance.
So in a couple more weeks you guys are gonna be unemployed too.
Our sixth challenge...
is to maintain America's leadership in the fight...
for freedom and peace throughout the world.
''Because of American leadership...
more people than ever before will live free and at peace.''
and at peace. And Americans...
Honey, that's amazing.
No, it's not. Dick Morris wrote that damn speech.
I know Dick's voice better than I know my own.
-You're sounding jealous. -Why?
Just because he's whispering into the president's...
ear while I'm sitting on my hands...
during a major election year?
Consultant without a campaign.
There it is.
Joe Shumate.
Mr. Shumate, big pleasure. My name is Felix Braynin.
I'm a Russian-American businessman and I live in Sausalito.
My references are good and long.
I faxed as we speak.
You don't sound you're calling from Sausalito, Mr. Braynin.
Felix, please.
No, you're correct. I'm in Moscow...
and I'm calling to proposition you, Mr. Shumate.
Really? Well, I'm flattered but...
But please, please read the fax then give me a ''but''.
Says here you wanna hire my partners and me...
for a campaign.
Not quite. It says ''The Campaign''.
Yes, it does, but it doesn't mention here who the candidate is.
No. That's correct. It's not secure.
Not secure?
Mr. Braynin, do you ever intend to tell us who the candidate is?
You're a smart man. You can figure it out yourself.
Okay.
Let's see. The Russian presidential election...
is in five months and...
When you say ''The Campaign'', you don't mean the...
No! No names. Not now.
But yes, your assumption is correct.
Heaven!
George, it's Joe. We have to talk.
Joe? You sound tense.
Man, you gotta find your equilibrium like I did.
I got a guy on the line...
who wants us for a gig.
Wrong number, Joe.
I'm now a full time spiritual rejuvenator.
The gig is in Russia and I think it's for Yeltsin.
You think it's for Yeltsin?
-What does the client think? -He didn't say.
He wouldn't say, not on the phone. Let me get him on the phone.
You can judge for yourself. Hang on one second.
Mr. Braynin, you are now on with my partner George Gorton.
Mr. Gorton, big pleasure. Name is Felix Braynin.
I'm a Russian-American businessman.
His references are good and long, George.
Congratulations, Mr. Braynin.
You make America proud, I'm sure.
Now, whose campaign do you want us to work on?
Mr. Gorton, I can't possibly divulge any more information at this time.
Thanks for your interest, Let us send you some literature on what we do...
and then you can make an informed choice.
No, wait. We know all about you.
You were highly recommended.
Mr. Braynin, could I just put you on hold for one more second?
We'll be right back with you. Hang on there.
George, I know what you're thinking.
And you're about to fuck yourself?
No, now listen, George.
Okay, he is probably nuts. That would make a lot of sense...
but did you ever think for a second, just one second here...
that he actually may be for real?
I mean, you know, what if this is Yeltsin?
If? If my grandmother had balls...
she'd be my grandfather.
George, I need you to concentrate, okay?
George, listen to me. This is the first free election in Russia!
The expected voter turnout is sixty-three percent.
George, that is ninety million people.
No consultant has ever moved those kinds of number before.
I mean, for Christ's sake, George, this could be the Mount Everest...
of consulting.
George?
-Hello. -Are you listening to me?
Yeah. No, I'm multitasking.
Let me just get Dick on the line, okay?
-He's good at cutting the bullshit. -He's gonna need a big knife.
Hello.
Dick, this is George and Joe here.
We have a Yakov Smirnoff on hold.
Says he wants us for a big gig in Russia...
-maybe for Yeltsin. F-Y-I...
the biggest election in the history of democracy.
I'm in. Why not? I have nothing to do.
Okay, now we're talking. Hang on.
Mr. Braynin, Dick Dresner has joined us here.
Mr. Braynin, it's Dick Dresner.
How much money do you have to spend on this campaign?
Unlimited. Whatever it takes to win.
For something like this, you're gonna need state-of-the-art everything.
Offices, telephones, computers, Internet...
Production facilities for television and radio.
Do you have all that in Russia?
Well, if we don't have something, we'll buy it for you, Mr. Dresner.
-Anything else? -Yeah, our fee...
is a quarter of a million dollars plus expenses...
and first class airline tickets.
Done. Our only request...
is that this arrangement be top secret.
Congratulations, my friends. You're hired.
I'll let the client know we got the Americans.
-I can't believe how stupid we are. -What are you talking about, George?
This could be the gig of all gigs.
Yeah, come on, George! This is the world stage.
We get Yeltsin re-elected, we're gonna be hotter than wildfire.
We should have asked for a million.
I think this was all a Russian conspiracy...
to get me out of Bali.
I wanna go back and I'm not giving them a damn refund.
Come on. Keep your pantyhose on. So, they're a little late.
Russians aren't exactly known for their punctuality.
Gentlemen, I'm Felix Braynin.
Welcome to Moscow!
-Good to meet you. -Nice to...
You look a little cold there.
Welcome, welcome. Good to see you.
Mr. Braynin, are we or are we not working for Boris Yeltsin?
Yes, of course we are. But please...
no names.
Felix, you travel with a lot of security, yeah?
Just part of doing business in Russia, my friend.
The homicide rate here...
is twice as high as in America.
And murders there are mostly related...
to drugs or gangs.
Here, most of the victims are businessmen and politicians.
You can take any empty box.
Yeah, any empty space is fine.
Please, do take off your clothes.
What for?
-For banya, of course. -Who the hell's Banya?
So sorry. This is banya. Bathhouse.
You want us to take a bath with you?
Don't worry.
It's a Russian tradition. Your host insists.
Yeah, but I thought you were our host.
Me? Oh, no. I just work for him.
Really? Can I ask you a little question, Felix, about this bath?
Is it necessary?
We don't want to offend our host or anything.
-And offended he will be. -Really?
It's just that we do so much better in meetings when we're clothed.
-Yeah. -Correct.
Gentlemen...
you'll be just fine.
George Gorton, Dick Dresner, Joe Shumate...
meet Andrei Lugov.
They are very nice, yes?
The girls.
They are friends of mine.
You can have them for the night...
or they can live with you.
I'll pay for either.
Thank you, thank you. That's a very kind offer.
Unfortunately, I'm married, practically a newlywed.
So, bad timing.
Yeah well, me too. I'm married...
and my wife is very familiar with sharp objects.
It's pity, pity!
But, George, you are a free man.
Yeah, but I make a point never to pay for it...
even with somebody else's money.
It's a matter of principle.
Principle?
Interesting! Interesting that you have them.
Goodbye.
Gentlemen, you like fish eggs?
There was a time when I sold eggs on the street.
Chicken eggs.
And now...
I own one of the largest businesses in Russia.
Thank God for democracy.
And for Yeltsin. Without him I would have nothing.
Sometimes not even the eggs.
The president is behind in the polls.
Yes, we're aware of that, Mr. Lugov and we're ready...
to rise the challenge. We have a system. It's called...
You don't understand. Yeltsin is the only candidate...
who represents true democracy.
And our democracy is young and fragile, like a baby.
It's a pant load of shit.
The country is in chaos, you know?
It's suffering starvation, crime, organized, not so much.
Look at me.
I have 200 bodyguards...
and do you think I can sleep at night? Do you?
No. No, I can't. I'm worrying about the future...
because imagine if the communists win...
Then we're all screwed, and the whole world is screwed with us.
It's a catastrophe of cosmic proportions.
Excuse me, Mr. Lugov.
What line of business are you in?
Mr. Shumate...
my business is my business.
Okay, gentlemen, you're hired.
I'll let the president know that we have Americans.
When can we see Mr. Yeltsin?
Tomorrow or some other day. Who is to know?
''Who is to know''?
Gentlemen, it went very well...
Andrei is impressed, I can tell.
What exactly is his role in the campaign, Mr. Braynin?
Technically, he's not really a part of the campaign.
He just handles certain monies.
Certain monies. Is he mafia?
Mafia? Oh God, no.
He'd have you killed if he heard you say that.
Welcome to the President Hotel, gentlemen.
Here in Moscow it's like the Ritz.
Looks more like The Rock to me.
Where is everybody? Is there something wrong with this place?
Oh, no. It's top shelf.
It was built for the Soviet bigwigs.
Hi.
If only these walls could talk.
Friends, please turn in your passports.
They'll hold them for now.
-I'm sorry? -For the whole time?
-For while you're here. -Is this customary?
It's safe. Go ahead.
George, hope you like.
Joe and Dick, your suites are exactly like this one.
It's nice. This looks nice. Thanks, Felix. What is this?
Look at this, Dick. Take a look here isn't that the Kremlin? Is it?
Hey, how's the coffee?
I've had cold piss that tastes better.
Slight exaggeration. Dick's in a foul mood.
We've been looking at the Yeltsin polls.
-So tell me. -I wanna go back.
Come on, you know... We knew Yeltsin was trailing...
that's why they brought us here.
He's not trailing. Trailing would imply some kind of forward movement.
Only six percent would vote for him.
The commie, Zyuganov, gets thirty
That is terrible.
What about other candidates?
All ahead. Reformists, nationalists...
There is even a so-called liberal democrat called Zhirinovsky.
Apparently he walks around Moscow in his underwear...
planning an invasion of Alaska.
-What is that? -I don't know. We ordered eggs.
Try the sausage.
The eggs are horrible!
Day two...
Yeltsin at six percent, eggs inedible...
which maybe explains why he's at six percent
What? It's notes for a book.
American political consultants behind the scenes...
in Russia struggling young democracy.
You don't think there's a book in this?
A very short one, maybe.
You haven't heard the best part. If the election were held today...
-apparently Stalin would get 8% -That's more than Boris.
Joe, Stalin is dead.
Not as dead as Yeltsin.
Good morning, gentlemen.
-Hello. -Very good news.
I got you a meeting with Oleg Soskovets right away.
Soskovets? That is good news!
You wait here a minute.
Okay. Thank you.
Andrei Lugov.
All right, very quickly. Who in the hell is Soskovets?
I think he's the First Deputy Prime Minister.
The Russian press have so far ID'd seven different people...
as Yeltsin's campaign managers. Soskovets is one of them.
What the heck are they doing in there? We've been here for 1 hour.
Killing themselves because they just saw the numbers.
Obviously they're gonna be concerned about the numbers.
We just have to be blasé.
''The numbers are bad but we can and we will turn it around.''
Are you suggesting that we lie to the Deputy Prime Minister of Russia?
-Do you have a problem with that? -No. Just asking.
Please, gentlemen, do come in.
Please.
-So? -So...
George Gorton.
Dick Dresner. How are you?
Joe Shumate.
How is our friend Bill?
Think he will beat Bob Dole?
-Probably. -Probably.
As Kruschev said, the only problem with election...
you never know who will win.
Clinton won the first time because Bush refused to believe...
he could lose.
Yeltsin is much the same. He doesn't trust numbers.
Speaking of which, we've seen the numbers. Not ideal.
But a lot can change in 4 months. Especially for the incumbent.
We just gotta get cracking A-S-A-P.
We have a system. It's called Election Gaming.
It's basically like...
Here are the rules...
You don't talk to the press...
No leaks at all.
You are never to reveal who your client is.
It will be a terrible blow to our national pride.
Your main job is...
to let us know if you determine that Yeltsin will lose...
-A-S-A-P. -As soon as possible.
Then we'll take the steps...
Wait, steps?
What do you mean, steps? What kind of steps?
That's it!
You are hired.
I'll let the president know we have Americans.
I was gonna take a walk, maybe you can tell me where...
But you don't speak English. I'm sorry.
When in Rome, speak Russian.
Me, I'm gonna, how do you say, promenade-ski...
-I speak. -You speak!
Walk not advised.
That was a short walk.
-Wasn't advised. -Told you.
What would happen if I didn't take their so-called advice?
They'd probably shoot you in the back...
or say, ''Have a nice day.''
Geez, Louise. What a country!
How about those stupid hats they all wear?
I mean, I know it's cold but, you know, have a little dignity.
Is anyone else curious about why no one seems to want to hear our pitch?
I'll tell you why. Because this whole thing is bullshit.
We've been here one week, no Yeltsin...
no meeting, no offices. Nothing.
Maybe A-S-A-P in Russian means...
-when hell freezes over. -Look outside. It already has.
Let's reach out and touch somebody, shall we?
Andrei Lugov, please. George Gorton here.
He what?
He is? Okay. Thank you.
They said he's too drunk to talk.
-They did not! -Direct quote.
You know, I don't wanna be a party poop or anything...
but this whole thing is starting to smell bad.
-There's an understandment. -Well, let's not panic, okay?
I mean, look at this rationally.
One, they forked over an awful lot of money to bring us here.
Two, so far they've given us VIP treatment.
I mean for Christ's sakes, they even offered us free sex.
-Which we refuse. -That was your choice.
And three, they take our passports...
and lock us up in a five-star prison...
and apparently no one wants us to provide the service...
they paid us for.
How am I doing so far?
If I wasn't panicked before, I'm panicking now.
It all sounds very Kafka-esque, doesn't it?
Come on, there's gotta be a logical explanation.
-I mean, why would they do that? -You want an explanation?
How about this for a scenario? How about this?
One, Lugov gets this great idea.
''Let's hire in Americans to save democracy...''
and of course, his money.
Two, he finds Braynin in Sausalito and says, ''Jump''.
Three, Braynin says, ''How high'', and reaches...
for the Who's Who of political consulting.
Four, we jump even higher than Felix because the check clears.
And finally five, Boris and his seven managers...
they don't like Lugov's idea anymore...
and so they're trying to figure out a way they can fuck us up the ass.
How's that?
Know what this whole thing is starting to remind me of?
-Dallas. -94.
That's right. That's right.
Tell you what, there's a Lufthansa at 10PM through Frankfurt.
All those for getting out of Dodge, say aye.
No, I think we oughtta ride this out and see where it goes.
Why don't you stay here and ride it out to see where it goes...
and send me a flipping postcard when you find out?
Hope I'm not waking you. Follow me. You got a meeting.
Thanks for the advance notice.
But unless it's with Yeltsin...
-I'm not interested. -It is with Yeltsin.
Let me get the guys here.
One American is enough for now.
Mr. Gorton, please meet Tatiana Dyachenko.
Hello. Charmed!
Tatiana's our president's daughter.
Please, sit down.
Sure. Of course.
My Papa...
he really believes in the democratic process...
and he truly wants to win...
but democracy is so new here...
nobody really knows how to do it.
There are so many factions in my Papa's staff...
they all give him so much contradictory advice.
And he asked me to sort things out.
But me, I'm just a mom, I'm just a wife.
I really don't understand the politics.
I don't know why he asked me.
Well, maybe he doesn't trust anybody else.
Do you think that Papa can win, truthfully?
Truthfully...
Yes, absolutely.
Just gotta give us a chance to do our job.
Who will tell you what to do?
You and your leadership committee.
-And will tell us what to do? -We will.
Look, we have a system. It's called Election Gaming.
I'm sorry but I have to go.
I have kids and...
I'm a wife and I have to go.
Great. I know you're busy. Everybody here's busy.
I mean, you bring us here, you need our help...
but then nobody wants to listen to what we have to say.
You're right.
It really is important.
-Do go on. -Really?
Okay. Well, the system...
is called Election Gaming.
It's basically like War Games...
only we use polls and focus groups...
to simulate an election.
We test everything, every idea that the campaign is using...
and thinking of using.
In a nutshell, we find out what voters want...
and we give it to them.
I can say much more, but that's essentially it.
It's kind of delicious but that's the short of it. That's it.
Mr. Gorton...
Uh?
You seem like a truthful man.
I would like you...
and your team...
to consult me and my family personally.
You're hired.
Good!
When can we meet your father?
Money. Money, right?
How much is a passport worth on the open market these days?
Sorry, I'm not authorized to do that.
Not authorized to do. They're not letting us check out!
Good. We're not leaving.
We got hired.
I'll be so lonely Baby
I'll be so lonely
I could die
You're telling me we're staying because you met Chelsea Clinton?
No, no...
Tatiana Dyachenko, née Yeltsin.
Graduated from Moscow University...
math and computers, married, two sons.
We know she can breed, so what?
I'm telling you. Tatiana is the real deal.
She's gonna be running the campaign...
and she's gonna be running it the way we tell her to run it.
Did she let you give her the Election Gaming spiel?
Yes. Finally. And she's into it.
I'm telling you.
Okay. So when do we meet Yeltsin?
I want my passport and I want it now!
-Just a second, Dick. -No seconds!
You can't run a campaign...
without a candidate, okay?
It's like having a dog and pony show...
without the pony. Without the freaking dog!
Dick, Yeltsin can't meet with us.
He's the Russian fucking president, for Christ's sake.
lmagine DC if it broke that Chinese were sitting in the Oval Office...
telling our president what to do.
He'd be out of the White House before saying, ''I like fries with that.''
That's right. And think of us. This is the mother of all gigs.
'Cause if Boris tanks nobody knows...
we steered the sunken ship.
But if he wins, we make sure we get the credit...
from bringing him back from the abyss.
It's a thing of beauty. And besides, we don't need Boris.
We've got Tatiana, and she's got his ear.
That's great.
Let's hope we can make a purse out of it.
Look who's got an office!
We did, that's who.
We're back in the game.
Sixteen weeks left 'til June sixteen.
Lot of candidates to overtake.
And we're getting a late start.
The campaign, I'm sorry to say, is not perfectly organized.
Now, we haven't done any polling yet...
but from the 1st look of it, the main problem with the campaign itself...
is that we are too many cooks...
and only one pot of broscht.
Meaning to say, no one to take responsibility for screw-ups.
What screw-ups? Be specific.
Apparently this is one in a series of Yeltsin campaign ads.
What he's actually saying is...
how much his life has improved under Yeltsin.
Well, the man is obviously a liar and a drunk.
I mean, how has his life improved?
What, is he even drunker now?
What Dick's trying to say is that...
not too many people are gonna believe a guy...
who's obviously been paid to praise the current regime.
Not really as effective as the candidate himself...
addressing the public.
No.
Papa will never appear in a television ad.
He will never sell himself like this.
Well...
apparently he doesn't have any problem doing this.
He didn't pose for that.
They just used this photograph.
Is it bad?
No, it's not bad if you want a poster for a horror movie.
He's kidding Again.
No, it's just the shot is... It's grim. Fierce.
Stop waltzing around the tree.
Are you saying this is hopeless?
That we won't win?
No, certainly not. That's not what we're saying at all.
What we're saying is... Let's hold our horses.
No more TV spots, no more posters, no more mailings.
None of that is working...
so we gotta find out what would.
It is impossible to target campaign resources...
without analysing all the moods and trends in this country.
We need hard facts.
We can't change opinions if we don't know what they are.
-Just gonna keep burning cash. -That's right. Exactly.
Let's find the best pollster in the country...
and start testing.
Soskovets is concerned...
Tatiana has no experience running the campaign.
Really? Well, no experience compared to whom?
Seven campaign managers...
apparently they're doing a bang-up job.
I am to be in all your meetings.
I also want to be briefed on the agenda in advance.
Is that clear? No exceptions.
These two will be your bodyguards, okay?
So, that means whenever you need to leave the hotel...
call downstairs, they will come and get you.
You are not supposed to go anywhere unescorted.
You have to stay inconspicuous.
No big crowds, no public places...
no campaign functions.
You also cannot run around Moscow...
saying, ''We work for Yeltsin, blah, blah, blah.''
Okay?
These guys are good at inconspicuous.
Right, and who exactly are they protecting us from?
So far, the scariest thing I've seen around here is them.
Hey, Vasso.
Vasso, my name is George Gorton.
We talked on the phone.
You watch ''Montecito'' at home?
Not as often as I'd like.
It's the most popular show here.
Most Russians never saw a bikini.
I did a poll that confirms this.
Fascinating.
So, how much would it cost us to do a sample poll?
Who are you? What is your business?
''Intervista InternationaI''.
We're bringing thin screen TVs to Russia.
Obviously it's a pretty big investment...
so we thought we'd do some general polling and market R and D.
Sixty thousand per poll. American dollars.
What, are you nuts?
There's three places here that will do it for 40 thousand.
But you want the best. I'm sixty thousand.
It's a deal.
You have a list of questions you want me to ask?
There you go.
''What do you think of Yeltsin?''
''Is the president doing a good job?''
''Does Yeltsin care for a person like you?''
Thin screen TVs, huh?
It's a big investment.
I'm sure you've met the new Russians.
Young men who drive fast cars...
wear labels on their underwear...
drink French champagne.
These...
these are the real Russians...
the kind work for a living.
The kind don't get paid.
We always feed them first.
Russians hate to talk on empty stomach.
That's good to know.
My first question is...
if Yeltsin were a tree...
what kind of a tree would he be?
What the hell's he talking about?
What happened to our questions?
I can't ask your questions.
They're too leading. Not scientific.
You're asking what kind of tree Yeltsin would be...
and our questions are not scientific?
Vasso, no offense, but we'd really appreciate it...
if you stuck to our questionnaire.
I would not feel comfortable.
I tell you. We paid you a shitload of money, so get comfortable.
I doubt you sell many TVs, Dick.
Right.
He does have a point about the TVs.
Let me rephrase the question.
What do you think about Yeltsin?
Is he doing a good job?
There must be some mistake.
No, no mistake.
The margin for error is two percent tops.
''Do you approve of the job Yeltsin is doing?''
Eight percent approve, fifty-nine percent disapprove.
''Does he care about a person like you?''
Ten yes, eighty-five no.
Seventy-five percent hold him responsible for the bad economy...
and sixty-nine percent think he's corrupt.
Seventy percent blame him for the war in Chechnya.
And sixty-one percent think he's too incompetent to lead.
-Fifty-nine percent feel... -Joe, Joe...
But there's more.
So, you say we can't win.
No. Who said that? We didn't say that.
Yes, those numbers are sheer agony.
But there are a few positives. There's a big block of undecideds.
They don't like Yeltsin, but they might vote for him...
if the only alternative is a communist.
Many people think Yeltsin was good once.
See, that's important because it means they can think it again.
He is good now... He is trying.
He is a good man.
Your father is a great man...
but, you know, that's a little less relevant right now.
Who he is isn't as important...
as who people think he is.
Which is why we have to change his image.
Repackage him.
Repackage?
Papa's not a bar of soap.
No. I didn't say he was.
But that's what you meant.
I'm not sure I like your Western politics.
Well, you'll like it if we win, you'll hate it if we lose.
So, we're gonna have to win at all costs.
I'll talk to Papa about it.
Dick, rise and shine.
Joe, drop your cock, grab your socks, we got developments.
What, what, what?
It must have gone well with Poppy.
They want us back at the table at two AM...
to work on his campaign kickoff speech.
They want what? No, wait.
We can't do that. That's not our job.
We don't know enough about the issues to write a kickoff speech.
-That never stopped us before. -I can't bullshit in Russian.
-Joe, where you going? -I'm going back to bed.
-No, we have an hour. -An hour?
That's different. I thought we were in trouble.
Okay.
We give them six bullet points.
The good old bullet point standby. Enlighten us, professor.
The speech is a kickoff, so it needs to be kickass.
Yeltsin's gotta come off as energetic. Vigorous.
Popular, and he needs a message...
that's topnotch.
Tatiana wants to know why her father...
needs a massage. To look more vigorous and energetic?
No, no.
Not massage. Message. What he actually says.
''Message'' doesn't exist in Russian.
It's really hard to translate.
Well, that explains a lot.
Forget the word. Word isn't important.
Let me show you what I mean. Look at Zyuganov's nomination speech.
That's fiery, it's contagious, and he's got things to say.
Slow down reform, quash the Chechens...
The guy may be a commie, but he's got a message.
That's what we need.
You see, unlike most incumbents, your father can't run...
on his past record because the majority of voters...
view him as a corrupt bumbler.
So, he has to... Instead run on promises...
and the shortcomings of the other candidates.
The president is spending too much time bickering with democrats...
essentially giving them credibility.
He should start attacking Zyuganov...
and present himself as the main alternative...
to the communists.
Attack Zyuganov? What do you mean, attack?
Not physically. He's gotta negative campaign him...
with truth squads and TV spots and sound bites.
Truth squads? Please explain.
Truth squads are hecklers sent to your opponent's rallies...
to challenge and boo, disrupt...
Did you guys watch the first Clinton campaign?
Anyway, they dressed this guy up in a chicken outfit...
Chicken George they called him...
and basically Chicken George would follow Bush around and heckle him...
because he wouldn't debate.
But that's unfair.
What?
Tatiana, it works.
You call this truth squads?
Yes.
Papa will not use this kind of tactics.
We may stop arguing with the democrats.
We won't have negative campaign.
What will we have?
A positive campaign.
You said something about running on promises.
So just give us the six bullet points...
so we can all go to bed.
What six bullet points?
Six or seven or whatever.
Some points he could address in the speech.
I think we need to take a quick bathroom break.
Two minutes, okay?
Ladies and gentlemen, also, if I may.
Joe.
-I don't have to go. -Now.
Better safe than sorry.
-What the heck was that? -Okay, let's recap.
One, we were alone when we talked about the six bullet points.
Two, nobody was taking any notes.
And three, the only possible explanation...
is that we're being bugged.
As usual, I've enjoyed the statistical analysis, Joe.
-Now I'm gonna go back and pack. -No. Why?
So they're bugging? So what? What've we got to hide?
Exactly. Why spy on us, right?
They're paying us for our ideas.
Dick, they bug everyone here. It's tradition.
Consider yourself culturally enriched.
That's right. Except I'm trying to remember...
Did they overhear anything? Did we say anything bad about Yeltsin?
You know, I think...
I think I called him a putz.
-You did? -I think so.
Maybe they don't know what ''putz'' means.
Maybe we can tell them in America it means ''great president''.
All right. We're back.
Now, this kickoff speech...
has to be different than anything that he's done.
Let's bring him in through the back of the auditorium...
where he parts the crowd like it's the Red Sea.
And the crowd's going nuts.
You station your people throughout to lead the crowd...
cheering, jumping up, applauding.
That's right and he's moving along, and he's shaking hands.
Like Kennedy, he's reaching out, he's squeezing hard.
And babies. He's gotta kiss babies.
If it's under three, he's gotta kiss it.
Yeah. On the forehead.
For some reason foreheads test better than cheeks.
Then he hits the stage and he's surrounded by friends and family.
-Lots of love, lots of support. -And he's smiling.
Smiling for him is going to be very important.
Now the speech. Short. Maximum twenty minutes.
And he needs to be sober.
Sixty-six percent think he drinks too much, so.
Perhaps we should schedule the speech early in the day.
-Great! -Good idea!
They look fucking comatose.
-It's like watching a corpse. -They could be listening.
Clearly they're not.
Clearly they haven't heard a fucking word we said.
Look at this...
it looks like they're applauding for letting them be corrupt.
They're applauding 'cause it's over.
Three hours and forty-six minutes. Can you believe that?
How does someone talk for 3 hours and 46 minutes?
Gotta be some kind of world record for talking.
What happened? For God's sake what happened?
We are so screwed.
Papa's advisors were against...
using phony American tricks.
Phony tricks?
Like what kind of phony trick? Like smiling is a phony trick?
They advised him that smiling would seem weak, make him seem...
Russian people want him to be...
more czar-like.
According to our polls, Russian people don't want him at all.
But the speech was a success, no?
He stressed the six points you suggested.
No, Tatiana, he didn't make a single point.
I can prove it to you.
This graph corresponds to the dials in front of each of the participants.
They turn it to the right, and the wave goes up. See?
They see something they don't like, they turn the dial to the left...
then the graph goes down.
All right, let's give it a whirl.
Sports is good.
All this activity. Everybody likes sportsmen. See that?
But look at this, when he looks mean. They don't like it.
They like it when he smiles.
I know.
Now here, watch this. The speech. See that?
Negative. It's negative entirely.
All the way through, negative.
You're right. They hated it.
They hated it. I know.
-This is amazing! -Isn't it? I know.
What do you call this machine?
This is the Perception Analyzer.
Perception Analyzer.
It's like you put their feelings on screen.
I'll tell Papa to smile more.
What do you want first?
A shower or a cigarette?
Did it occur to you that she is the daughter of the Russian president?
Really. Thanks for the info. You're something. Both of you.
Tatiana... It's not just the smiling.
He's got to totally drop the whole czar character.
No more speeches. More walk, less talk.
What he needs is photo ops.
Like maybe he should plant some trees.
-Trees? -Yeah.
But why trees?
Russian people like trees, don't they?
It shows he can roll his sleeves up and dig in and, you know...
he cares about the environment...
not afraid to get dirty...
and he likes being out amongst the people.
Papa doesn't like to be out among people.
He's afraid of being booed.
Afraid of being booed?
Well, that's fine.
You just get advance men to make sure...
there are more people cheering than booing.
-They drown out those boos. -Advance men?
Please, explain ''advance men''.
Advance men... Okay.
Advance men go everywhere your father goes...
but they go there first.
Like, let's say he goes out to a public place...
like a park or, you know, a factory.
Advance men make sure the locals get a paid day off...
and a Yeltsin poster in their hands, something written.
Wherever he shows up, they gather a crowd...
and they show them where to stand...
and teach them how to spontaneously, so to speak, cheer and wave and all.
They get some local kids or if they're lucky, a school band.
Make it exciting, you know?
As for the tree, advance men pick the right tree for him...
not too big that he can't lift...
and not too many branched that cover his face...
they dig the right hole for him, pick that perfect tree, etc.
Their main job, of course, is to be completely inconspicuous...
to make it look as unrehearsed and unplanned.
They have to make it look as if they're not there.
Advance men!
All my love
Darling
I'll give to you
Love me sweet and tender
Darling I love you
Here we go.
You did it.
The Yankees say, ''Plant a tree'' and bingo...
the ruler of the Russian Empire plants a tree.
This particular Bronx Bomber is tickled pink.
Congrats, comrades.
-Comrade. -Congrats.
What do you think, Dick?
Does this make up for not writing the State of the Union?
No. Not really
But it's pretty damn close.
Up three points overnight.
He should plant more trees.
More trees?
You want for him to plant a tree every day?
Yes, more than one if he can.
If it's not planted, plant it.
Many top campaign people are moving here...
to the tenth floor below us.
They're turning them into campaign offices.
Don't they trust us?
As we say. Success is contagious.
Everyone wants to be close to us.
As we say, set a meeting.
No. No meetings. It's too risky.
The more people you meet close to the president...
the more we increase the risk of leaks.
From now on...
all your ideas must be in writing...
for the people downstairs.
But the memos...
have to be sent addressed from ''us'' to ''you''.
No names. Security.
Felix.
From ''us'' to ''you''.
Basically, the overwhelming majority don't wanna see...
your mother out campaigning.
Raisa Gorbachev, a PR disaster.
Hillary, no great shakes there either.
What the numbers do suggest is they'd like to see her...
involved in charity work.
Do you believe in God?
Depends. Why?
You better start. Church is testing super high.
Higher than show biz or intelligentsia.
Let's recommend the endorsement.
From ''him'' to ''them''.
What's holding us up? What's the delay?
It's a mafia hit.
Head of a big television station...
shot in the head, middle of the street.
The body's just lying there. Blood all over.
Really?
Joe, yeah. When was the last time...
we did a from ''us'' to ''you'' on the mafia?
Yes, we're still against it.
Boris should take the strongest possible stand.
By the way, tell Tatiana there's a big job opening...
at a TV station.
Maybe she can pull some strings and get somebody who supports Boris.
Okay.
Tragic isn't it, these people?
They fought in World War Two.
They worked so hard all their lives...
and now look at them.
They're forced to sell their war medals to survive.
That's tragic.
Yeltsin's gotta do something for these people.
Yeah, he should.
There's so much he can do.
The sixty-plus have every reason to go commie.
Life savings have been wiped out by inflation...
their pensions are worthless, if they get them.
To tell you the truth, they're not equipped to cope with capitalism.
There's not a lot we can say to change any of that.
Yeah, I know. Except that...
Yeltsin's reforms may be good for the future of the children?
That's good. We should test that.
Vote Yeltsin for the sake of your children.
I'm gonna call Vasso.
Brother Joe, brother Dick...
we're in double digits, baby.
I guess that puts us on top of the democrat pile.
Poor of Zyuganovsky's gonna have to put off his invasion to Alaska.
Doesn't occur that the Russky press did a complete U-turn.
First got here we couldn't find a positive story on Boris...
now we can't find a negative one. They can see the numbers.
Yeltsin's the only one who can beat Zyuganov...
and believe me, they know which side their bread's buttered on.
If the commies win their little tryst with freedom of the press is kaput.
What a way to run a campaign!
With the press in our pocket! Are we good or are we good?
I say we are very good.
Plus it doesn't hurt to have the unlimited resources of Don Lugov.
Here's the deal. I've been tracking this Russian company Lukoil.
On Wall Street, it's twenty-four a share...
which is way, way undervalued...
because everybody's jittery about the election.
You see, if Boris loses, the communists deprivatize...
the oil industry, and Lukoil is dead.
But if he wins...
How much?
Modest estimate...
the stock quadruples in the first week.
-Oh, baby! -No shit!
No shit!
So, anybody's calling their brokers?
-Are you nuts? Fuck no. -Just thought I'd mention it.
Well, this is fun.
We are staring at the virtual corpse or communism.
I wish.
Communism's alive and well, kicking our butts at the poll.
Papa's topped out.
The commies haven't given up any ground. Fucking none
It would help if Tatiana would let us go negative, George.
If she could convince that putz to do some TV ads.
Not gonna happen, I've talked to her a bazillion times.
I've met 12 year-old children less naive than her.
She's not naive.
She's an idealist.
Touching.
Whatever she is, I just hope we can change it.
You know what I'm thinking?
This might be a good time for you to call your pal Morris.
Are you nuts? What for?
Tatiana's never gonna convince Papa.
We gotta get to him somehow.
Who's the most influential guy you know?
That's a great idea, Joe. I see where you're going.
I'm not calling Morris for any favors.
You'd be doing him a big favor.
If Russia suddenly goes Red in June...
his guy's dead in the water come November.
-Why? -No.
Come on, Dick, you know Morris owes you.
Mr. Morris, Dick Dresner on line two.
Dick, good to hear from you, buddy. How's the weather in Moscow?
You know where I am?
Yeah, got me a magic mirror.
Bill thinks it's extra bitching you're there doing what you're doing!
He does?
How would he feel about making a long-distance call to lend...
a gentle guiding hand to Boris as he takes his 1st steps to democracy?
I think he'd be tickled pink.
I'll tell him whatever you want.
You give me the laundry list and I'll fluff and fold.
They knew we were there. How the hell did they know?
Sure they knew. We were dumb to think they wouldn't.
When Felix said we were highly recommended...
how high do you think he meant?
Please, sit.
Papa said yes.
He will do the television ads.
I don't know why he changed his mind.
He was so against it.
Let's film Yeltsin for a couple of hours of time over...
the course of like seven days.
Make sure he's well rested, lots of rehearsal.
We just need five-second sound bites.
He should be walking, walking, you know...
through a crowd... through the woods
or dancing...
Maybe he's dancing on a stage.
Hello?
Hey, you guys are good! Really good!
Who's this?
My name's Dilon, and I'm calling from Virginia.
Got a minute we could talk?
-Won't take long. -Geez, I'm sorry!
This isn't the best time to talk, or place.
Understood. We just wanna let you know everyone at the company...
is rooting for you and your team.
We are, however, concerned about the loss scenario.
Per our sources Zyuganov has come up with a secret maximum plan...
he'll implement if he wins.
We don't know what it is exactly, but it can't be good for us.
So, good luck and keep up the good work.
We'll be watching.
Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen.
I'll see you later. Thank you very much.
C-I-fucking-A.
Is there anybody who doesn't know we're here?
When I realized who it was, you know I had a heart attack
They overhear that, they think we're spies.
''We'll be watching you''? What does that mean?
How? Watching what?
Just the way spooks talk.
What I wanna know is, what's this secret maximum plan deal?
And how come we never heard about that?
Wouldn't be a secret if we heard about it.
I hear about it.
Give me a drink, I tell you.
Help yourself.
A drunk Elvis impersonator told us...
about Zyuganov's secret maximum plan.
In a nutshell...
the pinklos wanna take the country back to the Dark Ages.
Old USSR borders...
re-nationalized economy...
and a vigorous prosecution of the reformists.
Of course it's just a rumour but Russians are pretty paranoid.
If it leaks, Zyuganov may lose a vote or two.
So, we gotta leak it like crazy, of course.
Mr. Morris, it's Dick Dresner.
Hey, Dick. My guy's headed your way.
We have an opportunity here. He can give your guy a few pointers.
Nobody ever accused him of being Slick Boris.
Whatever you want my guy to say...
he'll say it. Send a memo.
First, let me thank President Yeltsin...
for initiating and then hosting yesterday's Nuclear Summit.
It is fitting that this summit was held in Moscow.
For three years the President and l have worked together...
in trying to make the world a safer place...
by reducing the nuclear threat...
that all our citizens face.
We've worked hard to take down the old barriers...
to trade and to investment.
Thanks to the President Yeltsin's leadership...
sixty percent of Russia's economy is now in the hands of its people...
not the State.
Inflation has been cut.
Democracy is taking hold.
Since 1993...
trade between the USA and Russia is up 65%.
And the US is now the largest foreign investor...
-In this great nation. -In this great nation.
How'd he do?
Well, let's see.
Ask to be patient with reforms... Check.
Congratulate on the beginning of the pullout from Chechnya... Check.
Compliment on the privatization of the economy... Check.
Warn about Zyuganov's maximum plan... Check.
I mean bull's eye, boys.
He covered practically everything in our memo.
Note for another book.
Two presidents sell out...
the interests of their own countries...
in order to get each other re-elected.
I want a piece of that book.
-Hello. -Vasso.
-Yeah? -They loved the summit.
-The numbers are way up. -Really?
-Get back to you on the details. -That's great!
All right, bye.
What's going on?
Prelims are starting to come in. The Russians loved the summit.
Papa's numbers are up big.
He and Zyuganov are almost neck-in-neck.
Call me crazy, guys, but...
we can actually win this thing.
-Hi, Frank, George Gorton... -Stan, Dick Dresner...
Nothing ever changes here in Sacramento...
I've been on vacation. I wanted to talk to you about a stock...
-It's called Lukoil. -That's right. Like Skywalker.
-How much? -500.
-I'm a little short of cash. -Everything I got in the account.
Okay.
Great! Thanks.
Look at this! Soskovets finally making an appearance?
Who are the other two wise men?
The guy with the comb over is Alexander Korzhakov...
former KGB general and Papa's new head of security.
He's also his main confidante, tennis partner, drinking buddy.
-The other guy is Mikhail Barsukov. -Chief of secret police.
You're a scary man, Joe
Not as scary as those guys. What do they want with us?
I don't think they're coming to see you.
I just think they're going to the tenth floor.
To see the campaign managers? Why?
Who is to know?
Bullshit, Felix. You is to know.
-Me? I don't know anything. -Oh, yeah, you know something.
And you're gonna tell us, or I'll march over to Tatiana's office...
and tell her that you're plotting something behind her back.
Enough of this baloney, okay? I want the truth.
What's going on?
Okay.
Soskovets, Korzhakov e Barsukov they are known as...
The Party of War.
I hope that's a loose translation.
Those are the guys that pushed Yeltsin into Chechnya.
If they all came here, that means they're very worried.
What about? We're doing good. We're kicking butt.
That's why they are worried.
-They want to cancel the election. -What?
They think it's too risky to have one.
But see, but Yetsin's probably gonna win.
They don't want him to win?
They would love it if he won.
It's the ''probably'' part they can't afford...
because if the communists win they lose everything.
Their power, their stolen fortunes...
maybe their lives. That's why they want to cancel.
You don't cancel elections. It's not a dentist appointment.
Soskovets hired you. Why would he spend that money...
if he just wanted to cancel?
Yeltsin worships all things American.
The Party of War assumed that you'd take one look at the numbers...
and convince him he has no chance.
Pretty good assumption.
They didn't count on us turning it around.
They didn't count on Tatiana, or on the numbers going on.
And they still think we can do it, do they?
You, my friends, have become major nuisance for them.
And Lugov's involved too, right?
Thank you, Felix. Thanks for warning us.
I'm sorry, my friends, but those people...
you know, the KGB never went away. Just changed the name on the door.
I would really watch my back if I were you.
Who's gonna watch yours? You're the one who brought us here.
It wasn't me. I'm just a middleman.
Tonight I'm getting on the plane, back to Sausalito.
Got some business to attend to.
I'll bet.
Such bullshit. We were hired to dump the election?
It's like Oliver Stone.
Soskovets said himself. If you think he'll lose...
let us know so we can take steps. It makes perfect sense.
But we're professionals. We're American citizens.
They wanna take steps. Let them.
That's great, George. In case you hadn't noticed...
they're called The Party of War...
not ''The Party of Peace'' or ''Friendship'', or ''Brotherhood''...
-The Party of War! -I think that's a nickname.
Like son of... Sam's a nickname. I say we get the fuck outta here.
This is history in the making. We're right smack in the middle of it.
It's our big comeback. As long as the numbers are climbing...
the Party of War has no cards.
-What if the numbers stop climbing? -If they stop, we dump Lukoil...
and run as fast as we can.
He's right. As long as we keep showing Yeltsin good numbers...
they have no choice but to stay behind us.
Which is where they're goona have to be to do what they'll do to us.
Look at this.
The Wall Street Journal.
Moscow Mistery.
''GOP circles swirl with the rumor that California Governor Wilson's...
former campaign manager George Gorton...
is helping Yeltsin's presidential campaign in Russia.''
That's what rumors do. They swirl.
Call them...
and say it's not true.
No, I can't do that. Never lie to the press.
-You mislead them. -Do you understand that...
if this breaks in Moscow, then you'll be gone in three seconds...
and Yeltsin will deny your existence.
-What do you mean deny? -Gone. Gone how?
Gone, gone.
Unless you find a way to control American press.
Control the American press?
Sure! Piece of cake, Andrei.
Dick, that you?
Who's this?
I'll be damned, it's you.
What you doing in Moscow, Dick?
Call me back on my cell.
Come here.
What's up?
Okay. Here's the bad news first.
Michael Kramer has tracked us down.
What? Time Magazine?
I've known Kramer for a long time. He must've read that piece...
and figured I was in Moscow too.
But here's the good news... Here's the good news...
he may be willing to make a deal with us.
That's the good news?
We can't talk to him. Lugov finds out...
and it's goodbye, gone, we're denied our existence.
He never did say how we'd be gone. By land, by sea or by bullet.
If we don't deal with him, he's gonna dig around on his own...
he's gonna tell the story anyway and we're really gonna be screwed.
I guess this is it, then.
We get out now...
we get our passports somehow...
and that's it.
Flee.
Kramer didn't mention the cover.
The cover of the Time Magazine.
-Set a meeting. -Absolutely.
So... We're gonna do a little walk.
Alone? Not advised.
No. We'll be okay. Thank you.
Don't hear any gunfire.
Could've been going out every night!
-All right, there he is! -Jesus!
Be casual. Don't stand up.
-Hey, guys. -Why is he standing up?
Demonstrating casual.
-Am I California dreaming? -Listen, we got five minutes.
We're under strict orders not to talk to the media.
That must be painful for you, George.
-No! -What?
-What are you doing? -What?
We're being watched.
By who?
The CIA, the KGB, the secret police, the mafia...
the communists, the capitalists, Party of War...
even our own bodyguards. Everyone.
-They're all watching you? -Yeah.
It's a theory.
-Give it back. -Under the table.
Okay, look...
I'll need everything: the dates, the whos, the hows, the how oftens...
Sure, but first you gotta guarantee us...
that you're not gonna run anything till after the election.
Are you sure there's gonna be an election?
-Sure. Hell, yeah. -And we're gonna win.
And if we don't, we'll give you six bullet points as to why we didn't.
You are aware that the universe spins without your input, aren't you?
Dick said you mentioned the cover?
-That depends. -On what?
I want an exclusive.
-Okay. Done. -What else?
And I need verification. I mean no offense...
but I can't run the story on just your say-so.
What kind of verification?
I wanna see your offices at The President Hotel.
Remind me to laugh at that one later.
Michael, we're scared to be there ourselves.
You know what they'd do to us if they caught us sneaking in a reporter?
-No, what? -Actually we don't know either.
It's not good.
Look guys, I believe you. I really do.
But it's very simple. No proof, no pudding.
Can we...?
-This guy's a friend of ours. -Hi.
If you can just...
You know ''friend''?
-How do you say friend in Russian? -''Droog''.
I think that's what they said in ''Clockwork Orange''.
-Droog. -Kubrick?
Yeah, Kubrick.
Good, good. Very nice.
He speaks and you speak a little English.
-Hello? -Come up. The coast is clear.
Here we come.
Shit, mayday. Mayday.
Abort! Abort!. Stay down there!
What?
Tatiana.
Say hi to the world, guys.
We're great in the city.
It's five or six solid over Zyuganov.
In the countryside, he's holding ground.
We're not gaining any.
It's okay. I can understand.
Ideas?
Tatiana, your English, so good!
Give ideas, please.
Well, the peasants are unhappy.
We should give them something.
We already gave them democracy.
Well, now we gotta give them something with fewer syllables.
We were thinking land.
Here we are in a supposedly free-market economy...
and the land still belongs to the state?
That's gotta piss the peasants off.
Papa tried many times to give off land...
but Duma, our congress, doesn't want to pass it.
Find a way to get it passed.
Whatever's stalling it, get it unstalled.
I'm outside the service area.
No wonder the people are unhappy.
Maybe we should go to the focus group over there.
That's the only building that's big enough.
No, it's perfect. A barn.
Where else you're gonna focus a twenty-house...
one-water-pump village?
We're breaking new ground, boys.
What the hell do I need this land?
I need a tractor and seeds.
Then maybe I would want the land.
Why? Why would you want the land?
You can't even fix your chimney.
No one needs this land.
We need money.
We need our salaries back.
They don't want the land.
But it's not as hard as before, as during the war.
At least no one's trying to kill us.
Yes, they are...
In Chechnya...
getting our boys killed in Chechnya.
So much for swinging the rural vote!
You know what? Get Vasso in here.
There's one more question I'd like to ask.
The last question.
If Zyuganov wins...
will there be bloodshed or a civil war?
No.
No war, no bloodshed.
And why not?
The communists always brought war. They'll kill everyone.
Except us.
We don't have anything. They'll kill the rich...
then the rich will hire people to kill communists.
God forbid the communists win.
The last thing we need is another war.
Bingo.
That's it It's civil unrest, stupid
Tatiana, we have five weeks left
We gotta go negative. Not only negative, double negative.
We have to hit hard. Create a drumbeat.
War is an overwhelming fear in this country.
We gotta let them know that's exactly what they have to expect...
if the communists win.
Civil unrest, bloodshed, millions will die.
That's the message.
But we don't know if it's true.
In this business true is sometimes not.
But right here right now the only true is...
we gotta scare the crap out of everybody...
or we're probably gonna lose.
Our only hope is in the battle between somebody they hate...
and somebody they fear. Voters will hopefully choose somebody they hate.
Your father.
No! No!
My father still has dignity.
And we cannot stoop...
To that level.
We cannot stoop to that level.
Clinton, Bush, Reagan they all stooped to that level.
That's the name of the game, Tatiana.
Everybody knows it, everybody plays it, everybody stoops.
Mr. Gorton, in this group, you do suggestions...
and I do decisions.
And my decision is no
Love me sweet and tender Darling
She's not stooping?
That's her answer. She actually said that, ''I will not stoop''?
That's right. No stooping for that girl.
Maybe it's a good thing.
How's that, George? What do we do, spin it?
''Vote Yeltsin for he will not stoop''?
They have a culture here, you know, history...
a way of doing things.
Maybe not stooping is part of it.
Who are we to come in and tell them what to do?
It's not our country. Why are we messing with it?
What are you talking about, not our country?
It's not like you know. Russia's Snow White...
and we're the evil stepmother.
No, we're Uncle Sam.
Damn straight. Sam I am and I'm proud of it.
I mean, democracy is our biggest export.
But that doesn't give us the right to manipulate...
and corrupt their political process.
Corrupt? When did you turn into Ralph Nader?
These people don't need any help corrupting their process.
As far as I can see, they've managed that all by themselves.
-Am I right, Elvis? -That's right. Very right.
Boris marches around, says the back wages...
got repaid.
And I say, bullshit! Bullshit, Boris!
Me, I don't remember last time I got paycheck.
And most people I know, the same.
Zero.
What about that foreign relief money, where did that go?
I'll tell you where. I was stolen.
Neatly divided between Yeltsin's drinking buddies. Come on.
Watergate was preschool compared to this place.
Guys, forget about Russia. We have a much bigger problem.
If we do not go negative, there is no way in hell we'll catch Zyuganov.
What are you suggesting?
That we ix-nay on the Lukoil-lay?
I think that would be the prudent thing to do.
We doubled our oney-may. Let's not get reedy-gay
-Dump all of it. -The Russian stock...
If it's not too much of a loss, we should let it go.
-I gotta call you back. -All right. I gotta go.
What's going on?
This is bad. This is very bad.
What's the matter? What's very bad?
Boris Nikolayevich is missing.
What do you mean missing? Is he dead?
Who is to know?
All his meetings are cancelled.
Tatiana doesn't return my calls.
-Nobody's talking. -Give us a minute...
we'll find out what's going on, Lisa.
Thank you.
Lugov is unavailable.
Braynin's number in Sausalito has been disconnected.
The net is flooded with rumors. Nothing confirmed.
Hang on one second. One sec.
What?
This is the CIA. They wanna know if Yeltsin's alive.
What kind of freaking spies are they? That's their job to know.
I can't tell them I don't know. We're Yeltsin's personal consultants.
They'll think I'm hiding something.
They're gonna think we're idiots.
I don't want these guys on our ass.
It's nice to hear your voice too.
Could you just give me a second?
Richard Morris wants to know where Yeltsin is.
What do I tell him?
-Not that we don't know. -Gotta tell him something.
Hi, Mike. We were actually just talking about that.
Mike, could you hold on a second, please?
It's Kramer. He wants to know about Yeltsin.
-What are we gonna do? -There's only one thing we can do.
Remember that thing we did in Iowa that time?
No, George, no.
One, two, three...
-Yeah, Dick... -Hi, Mike, I'm back.
Look, you know apparently everybody down here. Hello?
I'm sorry? We're breaking up. I can't hear you. What?
Oh for God sakes, this damn battery.
Damn battery, Mike? Hello?
I can't hear. I think we got a dead battery or something.
-I' sorry. I'm gonna lose you. -I'll call you.
Okay. I'll call you back.
Papa had infarct.
Papa had what?
Heart attack. Infarct.
-I'm so sorry. Is he... -It was mild.
He will maybe live.
Probably.
But we don't know if he can campaign anymore.
So, what do we do?
How we spin this?
I think the first thing we do is we kill the rumors.
And we kill them fast. We say that...
Papa's been campaigning very hard and he needs rest.
Yeah. Stay away from the flu and cold stuff.
Everyone knows that's Russian code for deathbed.
It might not be enough...
There's five weeks to go and Zyuganov and his goons are...
on every corner waving a red flag.
His lead is tiny but it's holding.
Can't afford to have empty airwaves.
They will not be empty.
We are going negative.
Ads, slogans, truth squads...
I want everything.
Let's make the drum beat.
When did that happen?
What?
-She's become... -A politician.
Don't blame me.
Blame capitalism.
-What does that mean? -It's Russian for bullshit.
Dick, wait a minute.
Vasso, why don't you give us the latest poll?
Did you sell it to somebody else?
I neither confirm or deny. Who is to know?
I've had enough of this shit! Give us our fucking poll.
If you don't give us the poll, we don't give you the money.
You think you know so much, do you gentlemen?
You think you can come here and play us like some baseball?
Pardon my English, but you don't know shit.
That's where you're wrong. We do know shit. You're full of it.
The Yankee arrogance.
This is precisely why you're so despised everywhere.
Now step aside. You're blocking the show.
It's the commies, it's the bottom and they're getting desperate?
Vasso'd never sell out to them. He may be greedy, but not insane.
What about the Chechens? They'd do anything to sabotage Boris.
Doubt it. He's too patriotic to deal with the enemy.
You figure he's out fifteen grand for the polls...
now he's walking away from our 60. He's gotta be dealing with somebody.
It's obvious. It's got fingerprints of the Party of War all over it.
Front page. Vasso's poll.
Yeltsin is behind Zyuganov by twenty points.
What? Ridiculous. Yeltsin's ahead.
Mr. Shumate, how can you be so sure?
Because it's science. Yeltsin's ahead by three points.
Not according to Vasso's poll.
We know that the Party of War paid Vasso...
not to give us that poll.
Then they print this twenty points crap. It's bullshit.
What if three points is not enough?
What if margin of error jumps up...
and bites us in the ass? Then what?
Then nothing. Up or down, Zyuganov and Yeltsin...
are only a few points apart.
No one's going over fifty. There's gonna be a runoff.
You think, but you can't guarantee it?
That's democracy, No guarantees.
-It's kind of the whole idea. -George, that's your country.
Because in your country it doesn't matter who wins or loses.
Next morning, they find each other on the same talk show.
The election, it will be canceled. Do you understand that?
The Party of War will convince Papa to cancel.
Twenty points behind, he will listen.
We'll just have to convince him otherwise through Tatiana.
I don't think so. You will do just opposite.
You will tell her her father cannot win.
No, we don't lie to the employer.
George, I'm not asking you. I'm telling you.
Are you threatening us?
If Yeltsin loses, whose balls will be cut first?
Mine!
It was my stupid idea to bring you here to Russia.
Russia doesn't need to import all American political tricks.
All this hand-shaking, baby-kissing stuff.
It's better to kiss the babies than to shoot the fathers.
Gentlemen, gentlemen...
do you think you can just lose the election for us...
and then go back to Sacramento?
Think one more time.
I know where to find you.
This is great. ''American consultants come to Russia...
and destroy democracy.''
This is gonna look like shit on the Nightline.
I think I hear a very fat woman singing...
somewhere in the distance.
I'm glad you got a sense of humor about this, Joe...
-since this is your fault. -My fault?
How do you get it's my fault? I'm sorry. Explain that to me.
You said this will be the biggest election...
-in the history of democracy. -I answered the phone...
I picked up the phone. I seem to remember the words...
''hotter than wildfire, world stage''. Any of that ring a bell to you?
I was bored.
I wanted to get out of here since the minute we landed.
But you, Mr. Big Mouth, you talked me out of it.
'Cause you got book deaf fairies running around in your head.
This isn't the time to bicker and argue about who killed who.
We'll have plenty of time to do that on the way home.
We have a Tatiana meeting in ten minutes.
Great, why don't you go and kiss her goodbye...
-slip the tongue if you want. -What are we gonna tell her?
Nothing! We tell her absolutely nothing.
Good luck canceling the election. That's it.
There's a plane leaving in two hours.
I say we're on it.
Come on, guys. We gotta be unanimous on this.
It's the safe thing to do.
George?
I'm unanimous.
You have seen the poll. Twenty points.
What do you advise we do?
There's only one thing to do.
We cancel election, right?
No.
Fire General Korzhakov, fire Barsukov. Fire Soskovets.
Get rid of the whole Party of War.
They bought the real poll from Vasso...
and released a fake instead.
What? Are you accusing our generals...
They don't want this election. They never did
Tell your father he's gonna win.
It's in the bag. I guarantee it.
A memo to that effect is gonna be on your desk tomorrow.
Excuse us.
Excuse me.
When was it? When did you lose your mind?
Did you realize that you just pitted us against...
some of the most powerful criminals in Russia?
Tell me this is not happening. Tell me you didn't guarantee a win.
Why not? He's gonna win by three. That's what you said.
I don't know shit, George! I said it.
I don't wanna die for it. A guarantee?
God are you out of your mind?
That's the biggest fucking of consulting and you just...
give it to them without even asking us first!
Pinch me, George, before I throw you off this fucking balcony!
I didn't ask you first 'cause I couldn't believe I was dong it.
But it's either that or that's it. It's over.
So what? It's just a gig.
For us, yeah, but for Russia...They get the election canceled. Who knows?
Zyuganov, can you blame him, retaliates.
Half the army supports him already.
Civil war here ain't gonna be civil.
Everything we've been scaring them about in the ads...
that's gonna be reality. The US... You don't think we'll get screwed?
These A-holes have no clue where they keep...
their A-bombs. Can you imagine if anarchy suddenly rules?
Jesus. Talk about the new world order.
We can't allow it.
Somebody has to stand up and throw the tea in the harbor and say no.
-George... -We won't go gently into that.
George, George. We are political consultants. That's it.
We are paid by the client to predict polls. That's it
We are always backstage, under the table, in the shadows...
We're never gonna get elected or impeached...
or sacked in the end zone. We're not thoroughbred enough.
We're behind the scenes, We're the Making Of.
-Let's face it. -Is that it, George?
You wanna get sacked in the end zone. Is that it?
Just once. That'd be beautiful.
You know that if Yeltsin loses Lugov's gonna have us killed.
-You realize that, right? -I know.
That's why you guys have to take off on outta here.
-You're really something, George. -I'm sorry.
I had to do it.
No, Dick and I do all the work...
and now you wanna stick around by yourself to take all credit.
In your wet dreams, pal.
Have I ever told you you're both assholes?
-Has he? -Yeah.
Many times. And it's starting to hurt
We came as a team. We're gonna leave as a team.
You're the quarterback. Make the call.
From ''us'' to ''you''.
The Party of War is trying to cancel the election.
We strongly disagree with that position.
We believe Boris Yeltsin will win by three...
the election is in the bag.
The memo was a big hit, or a big miss.
We're not sure. The election isn't canceled.
At least not yet.
But Tatiana has disappeared...
So have all her cronies.
Everybody's playing possum.
Elvis is spreading rumors about a military coup.
He thinks it's gonna happen whether Yeltsin wins or loses.
Is he right? It's hard to tell.
Snipers on rooftops.
Somebody's getting ready for something.
-Are any numbers in yet? -No, just frigging soaps.
They won't announce anything until the polls are closed.
My hands are shaking.
Why are my hands shaking?
We'll know sooner at the Election Central.
Yeah, but we can't go in there.
We're sitting ducks here. We gotta get out of the hotel.
No, no. If they were gonna kill us here, they would've done it already.
Maybe, maybe not. Who is to know?
Don't start with the ''who is to know''.
It's better if we split up.
They can't kill one of us without killing all of us.
Wouldn't make sense. No way to damage control.
George?
Hello.
Can I make a call if I may?
To the United States? America?
Lines...
No calls.
Hi, this is me, George Gorton.
I'm calling from Moscow, Russia.
It's June 16th, 1996...
it's about 4PM my time. The reason I'm calling is...
I may be killed today...
Hello? Hello?
-What? -We're dead.
-Tell me something I don't know. -I was leaving a message...
on my office machine. It got cut off.
Operator said all lines are out.
Can't get international on my cell.
Somebody's gearing up for major bloodshed.
They're cutting off the connection to the outside...
-They're dusting off the... -You gotta get a hold of yourself...
-Your paranoia's getting better. -You know what? Screw it.
-Screw what? -Everything.
I'm heading down to the Election Central. I'll see the returns.
You can't go down there. Lugov's down there.
Here I go, Dick, before you change my mind.
Shit!
He's gone down to the Election Central.
Joe, he's gone down to the Election Central. What are we gonna do?
Okay. All right.
-I'm going too. -You are?
Think about it, Dick.
One, George goes down there all alone and catches all the action.
Two, knowing George, we never hear the end of it.
And three, when he writes the book...
we're gonna look like a couple of chicken shits.
How can he write a book if he's fucking dead?
You don't know George.
Help me move this stuff.
If anything happens to us, I'm gonna make sure they kill you first.
-Wimp. -Chicken.
Let's get in there.
Remember, guys, it's a science. He's gonna win by three.
Numbers are down in the Far East.
He's gonna win by three. Don't worry.
Look at Moscow neck-in-neck. We should be sweeping there.
Polls are still open. Win by three.
-We're losing the election. -We aren't wining by three, Joe.
Look at wheres not whys. Most of the early are rural. We'll move up.
The shit's about to hit the ceiling fan. Look who's here.
Did he see us?
-We're still alive, aren't we? -Yes, we are.
And we are going to win by three.
Who's this?
What'd she say?
Excuse me. Do you speak English?
What's going on? Can you tell us what she's saying?
She's predicting Yeltsin winning by three.
-By three? -Yes.
She said that? What else? Anything else?
She's also saying based on the exit polls...
the only thing Russians like less than Yeltsin...
is the prospect of upheaval.
What did I tell you? We scared the shit out of them!
See? Trust science. Just trust science
Tell him we do want the gig, We'll be just a little late.
I'm great. We won, didn't we?
-Tell them to keep their pants on. -Okay. Bye.
Look at this traffic! We'll never make our flight.
We'll make it. With twenty to spare.
We should never have dropped Lukoil.
Stocks quadrupled since we bought it.
The last time I listen to you, George.
Hey, what are you doing?
It's June, George.