Oh, is this great or what?
What?
Oh, this.
Yeah, this is great,
but I've been waiting for some of that.
But that's just it.
This is great, even without that.
It is?
Of course it is.
Well, not that that isn't great,
but this just works so well
because we're already such good friends.
It's true.
There's nothing like a good friend.
Now, enough of that, how about some of this?
You know, we don't have to make out. We could just hang out like we used to,
because on top of being boyfriend and girlfriend...
We're also good friends.
Oh, see how lucky we are?
I always thought "getting lucky" meant something else.
So... what should we do, friend?
Well... how about some of this.
Now that's what I'm talking about.
♪ Sometimes in this life ♪
♪ You can feel all by yourself Check one, two ♪
♪ But I have a partner ♪
♪ When I can't trust no one else Uh-huh ♪
♪ So don't isolate yourself ♪
♪ When there's nobody around Uh-huh, oh, yeah ♪
♪ I'll be there through thick and thin What a true love we have found ♪
♪ Me and you against the world ♪
♪ Living one on one ♪
♪ One on one ♪
♪ Can't nobody break this bond ♪
♪ Living one on one ♪
♪ Life has just begun Now we're having fun ♪
♪ Living one on one ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah One on one ♪
Breanna.
What?
This is dusting.
See? Look at that.
Oh, my God. Dr. Phil is white.
Can I get a little help?
You know how upset Natalie is with me.
She's on her way over here, and I want everything to be perfect.
Daddy, you can't commit; I come from a broken home.
It ain't never gonna be perfect.
Yeah, well, you're forgetting I have the secret weapon.
Behold, pay-oh.
Breanna, put the engagement ring back in the box.
I'm just so excited. So, are you proposing tonight?
Nope.
On Saturday night, yes.
After a romantic dinner, there will be flowers,
violins, and when I drop to one knee,
a choir will magically appear out of the crowd
singing the glory that is us.
[phone rings]
Hello?
Oh, hey, Mommy. How's everything in Africa?
Oh, you're going on safari?
[knocking at door]
Oh, that's Natalie.
All right, beat it.
And if anyone shoots your mother, tell her I'll put her head over the fireplace.
- But, Daddy, we don't have a fireplace. - Well get me her head, and I'll build one.
Go, go. I'm coming.
Hey, baby, you look good.
Yeah, I know.
What do you want?
You.
You're the most important thing in my life and I just want to tell you that...
Flex, I need to talk to you right away.
Not now, Duane, I'm talking to Natalie.
Oh, that... that's okay.
Y'all... you two just... go on with your lives.
Now, what I was going to say was that
I was wrong and...
Wait a minute, Flex. Duane left your apartment after only being told once.
Oh, my God.
He's dying.
That fool owes me $50.
Duane, are you okay?
Flex... man, I went to the doctor today.
I don't know how to tell you this, but...
- but I have... - What is it?
High cholesterol. Aah!
Well, man, cut out all the cheese.
If you don't mind, I need to get back in here to the woman I love.
Flex, I can't cut the cheese.
The doctor says it's genetic. He says I should find my father to see
if there's any history of heart disease in my family.
I think that's a great idea.
You might want to start looking
in the short and husky department at Sears. See you.
Flex, man, look, this is serious.
The prospect of finding my dad has always scared me,
but now I have to.
I need to know him, Flex.
All right, you're right, man, I'm sorry.
Now, what has your mom told you about him?
My mom.
Oh, that's a great idea.
I mean, she probably knows who he is, right?
What other words of wisdom do you have for me, O Wise One.
Making me drive all the way over here.
Selfish from beginning to end.
Bottom line is, you just can't commit, can you, Flex?
Ow!
Oh, my God, it's beautiful.
It's perfect.
♪ I'm getting married, I'm getting married ♪
♪ Before my sister, before my sister ♪
I forgive you, Flex!
I forgive you for everything.
Well, I was only gone for five minutes.
What would you have done if I was gone for ten?
Why don't you go back out and see?
Okay.
Thanks for carrying my books for me, boo.
You're welcome, boo.
Thanks for carrying my books, Spirit.
These are mine.
I left your books back in biology.
Aw, man!
[laughing]
- What's so funny? - These are his books.
Oh, don't turn around. There's Josh.
Oh, I just feel so bad.
I broke his heart.
I should go over there and see if he's okay.
Look at him.
He's hot, and blond...
Girl, he'll get over it.
Hey, Josh, how's it going?
What do you want?
I want us to be friends.
JOSH: Please...
You ripped my heart out and tossed it on the sidewalk.
Don't you mean, kicked it to the curb?
Whatever. I'm sure there's a dog and a homeless guy
fighting over it right now.
Well, if you change your mind, let me know.
Oh, it hurts, doesn't it?
Yeah. What about you?
- Doesn't it hurt seeing her with Arnaz? - Uh-uh, that's his loss.
She'll never love him the way I do.
Not with all those "morals."
But it's not too late for you.
What are you talking about?
You know better than anyone else Breanna doesn't know what she wants.
You should be her friend again, because you never know.
Yeah, that's exactly what Arnaz did.
Mm-hmm, that's all I'm trying to say, boo.
But you know what they say...
"Break up to make up."
I'm way ahead of you.
So, what do I do next?
Just you leave it up to me.
Ginger's going to take care of it.
- [humming] - [laughing]
Mm...
Yo te quiero, nene, pero esa fresa esta podrida.
Oh, that's sexy.
What did you say?
I love you, baby, but that strawberry's rotten.
[laughing]
Oh, really, well, how about... this one?
[humming]
Oop! Got it!
Mm, we should do this when strawberries are in season.
Mm-mm.
Nope, we'll eat them, and we'll like them.
I skipped school for this,
and I don't skip school for just anyone.
And I don't fall in love with just anyone.
Oh...
Really?
What do you love about me?
Well, let's see.
I love the way your nose crinkles up when you smile.
I love how when I've had a hard day, you rub my back.
And I think it's so cute how your feet bloat up
when you eat too much salt.
That's not cute.
No, it's not cute, but it's love.
Mmm-mm.
Is there anything you want to, um, ask me?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Will you...
have dinner with me tomorrow night?
Yes! Yes! Of course, yes!
Okay, I'll take that as a yes.
Oh, dinner.
Oh... dinner!
Right.
I love dinner.
Well, Breanna won't be home for another three hours,
so, uh... we can skip right... to... des... sert.
You have some soap on your nose.
Oh... um... can you get it for me?
Yeah, sure.
Oh, wait. My hands are wet, too.
Come here.
Mmm... SPIRIT: Okay...
you guys better cut it out. Your dad's going to be home any minute
and he's gonna suspect something when he sees me throwing up all over the place.
What's going on?
Hey, Daddy.
You two have been fooling around...
and you've been watching.
Uh-uh!
No, sir. I have way too much respect for you and your daughter
than to ever do something like that under your roof.
But you do be watching all the time.
Flex, Flex... my mom finally gave me my dad's real name.
She's been lying to me all these years. His name isn't Deadbeat Knox.
So, how are you going to find him?
Private investigator, made an appointment for tomorrow.
- Will you come with me? - I'd be happy to give you moral support.
Actually, I was looking for a little financial support.
This guy isn't cheap.
I know you're not kissing behind my back!
Hey, Daddy.
MAN: Here we go. I did a preliminary background check on your father.
Uh, his name is Vaughn Odell Knox.
Ooh, Odell. We have the same middle name.
Also known as "Hard Knox," "Knox Three-times,"
and "Knox, Knox, Who's There."
You got to be kidding me.
This must be some kind of joke.
Nope. Apparently Duane's father is a CIA operative.
[laughs]
My dad's cooler than your dad.
Duane, this guy is just preying on your emotions.
Listen to everything that comes out of his mouth. It's wacky.
Oh, you think so, huh?
Mr. Fla-dapp man.
Well, that's not much of a secret. I'm on television twice a day.
Yeah, well, your real name is Flex Barnes.
O-positive blood type.
Eighth grade GPA was 2.9.
Wife Nicole, hates puppies, butterflies and... rainbows.
What kind of monster is she?
Well, he's right about the puppies thing.
Yeah, and the butterflies...
and the rainbows...
and, Lord knows, she is a monster.
But we're definitely not married.
According to the court records, you've been married since June 18, 1986.
No, man, this has to be some kind of mistake.
We've been divorced for 14 years.
No, you've had an overdue library book for 14 years,
but you're definitely not divorced from Nicole Aretha Barnes.
I can't believe this.
I'm still married to Nicole.
Well, how can you propose to Natalie if you and Nicole never got a divorce?
Ooh, that's a daddy question.
I'm supposed to take Natalie to dinner in an hour.
I can't believe this,
for the past 14 years I've still been married.
This is crazy.
Don't sweat it, Flex.
When Nicole picks up, explain the problem.
She'll sign some papers and you'll be divorced. Again.
For the first time.
When you talked to your mom yesterday, what did she say?
That she was going on safari in the jungle so she'll be unreachable for three days.
Anything wrong?
No, no.
Okay. Well, I'm headed to cheerleading practice.
Good luck with your proposal tonight.
Yay, Daddy!
See ya.
That's it, dawg.
The proposal's off.
I could kill Nicole.
Having a wife is ruining my relationship with my girlfriend.
I have to call Natalie now and cancel our date.
Hey, honey, let's go. Don't want to be late.
Uh, Natalie... What are you doing here?
I'm just so excited about tonight I can't wait to eat dinner and be engaged.
In... stimulating conversation with you.
Uh, o-okay. Let me get my jacket.
Come on, I'm hungry, I'm ready, and I'm 30.
Hey, D, cancel everything.
The flowers, the singing, everything.
Come on, I told you I'm 30!
Quick, Breanna's coming.
- Okay, so what do I do? - Okay, follow the plan.
Make up, accept her apology, take her to Burger Hut, 7:30.
They have better fries at McDonald's.
Oh, you're so cute.
"They have better fries at McDonald's."
Stick to the plan.
Oh, Breanna, hey.
Look, uh... I've been thinking,
and I'm ready to accept your apology.
Oh, Josh, I'm so happy.
You know, I never meant to hurt you.
Hey, it's all right.
Look, how about I take you to the Burger Hut later as friends?
Say, 7:30?
Okay.
All right.
[chuckles]
[fake crying]
Ginger, are you okay?
Like you care.
Look, even though we're not seeing each other anymore,
I'd still like to be friends.
Well, I can't talk about it in the hallway.
I don't want prying ears knowing my business.
But I wish there was some place we could go talk in private.
- How about the library? - Burger Hut, 7:15?
Okay, I'll see you then.
Thank you, Arnaz.
You're such a good friend.
Yeah, could you have Nicole call me as soon as she gets back to the hotel?
Thank you.
How do you say good-bye in Skukuzi?
All right, peace out.
I can't say this enough, Flex,
I just love this restaurant. It's so romantic.
They have this wonderful lotion in the bathroom.
It makes my fingers so soft and silky.
Don't you think?
Oh, your right hand is silkier.
You can get the same results with butter.
Oh, my God, Flex, rose petals.
What's the occasion?
Uh, it's no occasion.
There's a hole in the roof,
and I'm calling the Health Department!
I'll be right back.
Duane...
you forgot to cancel the rose petals.
No, this ain't your daddy.
I asked you to cancel all my proposal plans for tonight.
Man, how could you forget?
- [violin playing] - I got to go.
[playing Here Comes the Bride]
Uh, excuse me, could you, uh, play something more romantic?
But I love Here Comes the Bride.
[continues playing]
I said, something more romantic.
[playing Eine Kleine Nachtmusik]
Flex, what has gotten into you?
Uh, nothing.
It's no big, uh... Uh-oh.
♪ Ooh, Natalie ♪
♪ Please take my hand and mar... ♪
All right!
Y'all came in a little too early.
Uh, if I'm going to do this,
I'm going to do this the right way.
Natalie...
all my life I've considered myself a lucky man,
and then you came along
and I feel even luckier.
I love you,
my daughter loves you,
and the three of us are great together.
So, Natalie...
will you marry me?
Oh, my God, I never expected this!
Yes. Yes.
[applause and sighs]
Oh, okay, that's your cue, guys.
♪ Nothing should separate us, now and forever more ♪
♪ Ooh... ooh... ooh... ♪
♪ Marry me... ♪
♪ Natalie ♪
She's gone... my best friend Jennifer.
The doctor said it was peaceful, though.
Hey, isn't Jennifer your cat?
Some say she's a cat, I say an angel with whiskers.
You know what, Ginger?
I hope you feel better,
and sorry to hear about your cat... angel...
the dead thing, whatever.
But you understand me so.
Is that Arnaz and Ginger?
Kissing?
Arnaz?
How could you?
It's not what you think, Breanna. This wasn't that! Breanna, wait up.
She's gone.
But I'm here for you, boo.
Duane, I'm engaged!
Oh, Nat... oh, you are the greatest.
Not that many women would have said yes knowing that Flex is still married.
You're still married?
Oh, well, it's actually...
it's a funny story, girl.
You're just going to laugh and laugh and laugh.
[forced laughter]
Put me down.
It's the craziest thing.
I mean, there's Nicole, there's this baby...
I don't want to hear this.
Look, it's no big deal.
Apparently, our divorce never went through.
And once I track Nicole down, things will be fine.
I don't kiss married men.
But I'm not really married.
Oh, right, just "legally" married.
- I got a message. Maybe it's Nicole. - [beep]
MAN: Mr. Washington, this is the American Consulate in Skukuza.
I have bad news.
Your wife Nicole took a drive into the jungle
with her lover Jayden.
There was an accident.
Their empty jeep was found
overturned several miles from the main road.
Apparently, they are lost deep in the jungle.
- [beep] - Daddy, is Mommy okay?
I don't know, baby.
I don't know.
Oh, hey, Pete.
Duane, here's the info I promised you.
Oh, man.
I can't believe it.
My father's in this envelope.
Yes, I'll catch the first plane out.
It's okay.
It's going to be okay.
[animals chattering and squawking]
NICOLE: Jayden!
[crying]
Oh... Oh, ow, ooh! Ow!
Jayden!
Ow! Something bit me!
♪ One on one ♪
♪ Uh-huh yo Ooh ooh ♪
♪ One on one ♪
♪ One on one we're just ♪
♪ One on one ♪
♪ Uh-huh yo Ooh ooh ♪
♪ One on one ♪
- I love you, Daddy. - Love you, too, Nellie.