Hello and welcome to the News at When. When?
Well the modern day I suppose Today we're looking at how come Britain
has connections with so many countries around the world. Here to explain more is Bob Hale
with the British Empire Report. Bob. Thankyou Sam. Well there it is. The world.
And right there, in the middle of it is England tiny little country with a big idea
to take over everywhere else and become really, really powerful
So, in 1583, a Tudor chap called Humphrey Gilbert lands over here,
in a new found land, called Newfoundland He claims it for England, and so the Empire begins
Sadly, he doesn't leave anyone there to look after it and then he dies on the way home
So, all in all, it's not a brilliant trip But England tries again.
In Stewart times, back across the atlantic they go and this time they claim Canada, and the Caribbean
and most importantly, the east coast of America Which means we finally have a British Empire
and everything's going awfully, awfully well! But not for long!
The American states declare independence Not only do they declare it, they fight for it!
And they win! Aah, it's a disaster! So, Britain has to go try its luck somewhere else
Fortunately, Captain Cook discovers Australia So Britain says "We'll have that!"
and also decides they would like a bit of Asia You see there's a British business in Asia
called the East India Company which trades in things like tea and biscuits
Mmm, yummy! Because everyone loves tea and biscuits, right?
In fact, everyone loves it so much, the company becomes big and powerful
and starts to take over entire countries Plus, Britain wins the Napoleonic wars
against the French Empire and they nab more countries off of them
But wait a minute! It seems the Indian people don't like
being ruled by a tea company, and who can blame them?
They decide to rebel The British army, however, crushes
the rebellion, and Queen Victoria takes over the country as Indian Empress
which doesn't impress the Indians. Ha haa! Meanwhile, over here, it seems that the
Dutch won't share South Africa Naughty, naughty!
So Britain has a couple of wars down there: the Boer Wars
and gobbles up a few more countries along the way In fact, by the time the World War I breaks out
a third of all Africans are ruled by the British. And what's Britain's prize for winning the war?
A load more countries, of course! I mean, just look at it all!
A third of the planet run by one tiny island! But not for long! First to go are
Australia and Canada and Egypt and they demand to be recognised as equal countries
so they're out of the Empire! And then World War II happens,
Britain wins, but we're completely broke! And you can't run an empire without money
Especially when the people don't want you there in the first place.
So India leaves, and everyone else isn't far behind 1948, and Ireland goes. Seeya Ireland!
And then Sudan. Bye Sudan! And then Cyprus and South Africa
And Zanzibar and Malta Then Singapore, then Fiji
Then Hong Kong, then the screen goes dead then the cat's put out, then the phone's unplugged
the lights go off, the milk gets cancelled the gas is disconnected and I have to hand back to Sam
Back to you Sam. Thanks Bob.
I love to be a British queen I am Victoria, you see
Now where's my British butler With my British cup of tea?
Tea is not from Britain, ma'am From India it was brought
Yes, for your cuppa, thousands died And many wars were fought
British things, my British things It seems that tea is not
British things, my British things Can I sweeten it a jot?
Do tell me sugar's British though No, it's Caribbean imported
For sugar in your cup of tea Slavery's been supported
I know it's wrong, your majesty But slaves in Africa
Worked hard in fields of sugar cane To sweeten up your cha
British things, ah British things I thought that there were many
British things, ah British things Afraid there's hardly any
You know your British cotton vest What's wrong with it? Explain!
The cotton's from America And picked by... slaves again!
Your empire's built on fighting wars That's how your income's swollen
Your British things are from abroad And most are frankly stolen
Whatever next? Go on! Pray tell! Our British queen is foreign as well?
It's true, I am of foreign descent And your husband, Albert? A German gent!
At least I've got a British name Victoria's Latin... that's a shame!
British things, ah British things There are none, we declare
All our favourite British things Seem to come from elsewhere!