0 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:53,000 ( aku kadak ) 1 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:55,695 Onward, Chauncey! 2 00:00:55,835 --> 00:00:58,429 To the highest room of the tallest tower... 3 00:00:58,571 --> 00:01:03,668 ...where my princess awaits rescue from her handsome Prince Charming! 4 00:01:15,021 --> 00:01:18,787 This is worse than "Love Leters". I hate dinner theater! 5 00:01:18,925 --> 00:01:20,688 Me, too. 6 00:01:22,028 --> 00:01:24,019 Whoa there, Chauncey! 7 00:01:25,431 --> 00:01:28,889 Hark! The brave Prince Charming approacheth. 8 00:01:29,035 --> 00:01:33,404 Fear not, fair maiden. I shall slay the monster that guards you... 9 00:01:33,540 --> 00:01:36,475 ...then take my place as rightful king. 10 00:01:36,609 --> 00:01:38,201 What did she say? 11 00:01:41,981 --> 00:01:43,380 It's Shrek! 12 00:01:43,650 --> 00:01:45,311 Whoo, Shrek, yeah! 13 00:01:47,554 --> 00:01:49,647 Prepare, foul beast... 14 00:01:49,789 --> 00:01:54,453 ...to enter into a world of pain with which you are not familiar! 15 00:01:54,594 --> 00:01:57,154 Happy birthday to thee Happy birthday to thee 16 00:01:57,297 --> 00:01:58,559 Do you mind? 17 00:01:58,898 --> 00:02:02,061 Do you mind? Boring! 18 00:02:06,573 --> 00:02:08,905 Prepare, foul beast... 19 00:02:17,917 --> 00:02:20,613 Someday you'll be sorry. 20 00:02:20,753 --> 00:02:22,914 We already are! 21 00:02:48,047 --> 00:02:49,344 Mommy... 22 00:02:53,286 --> 00:02:56,778 You're right. I can't let this happen. 23 00:02:57,624 --> 00:02:58,955 I can't! 24 00:03:00,126 --> 00:03:03,892 I am the rightful King of Far Far Away. 25 00:03:04,030 --> 00:03:06,123 And I promise you this, Mother... 26 00:03:06,466 --> 00:03:09,196 ...I will restore dignity to my throne. 27 00:03:13,806 --> 00:03:14,898 And this time, 28 00:03:15,041 --> 00:03:19,205 no one will stand in my way. 29 00:03:36,162 --> 00:03:37,823 Good morning. 30 00:03:38,831 --> 00:03:40,492 Good morning. 31 00:03:42,168 --> 00:03:43,192 Morning breath. 32 00:03:43,336 --> 00:03:46,499 I know. Isn't it wonderful? 33 00:03:47,173 --> 00:03:49,004 Good morning, good morning 34 00:03:49,676 --> 00:03:52,076 The sun is shining through 35 00:03:52,211 --> 00:03:54,406 Good morning, good morning To you 36 00:03:54,547 --> 00:03:56,674 And you! And you! 37 00:04:00,586 --> 00:04:02,281 They grow up so fast. 38 00:04:02,422 --> 00:04:04,515 Not fast enough. 39 00:04:06,592 --> 00:04:09,288 You'll be filling in for the King and Queen. 40 00:04:09,429 --> 00:04:12,626 Several functions require your attendance, sir. 41 00:04:12,765 --> 00:04:16,064 Great! Let's get started. 42 00:04:16,202 --> 00:04:19,035 Come on, lazybones. Time to get moving! 43 00:04:19,872 --> 00:04:22,136 You need to get a pair ofjammies. 44 00:04:29,582 --> 00:04:32,813 I got some sleep and I needed it 45 00:04:32,952 --> 00:04:35,682 Not a lot, just a little bit 46 00:04:35,822 --> 00:04:38,916 Someone's always trying to keep me from it 47 00:04:39,058 --> 00:04:41,891 It's a crying shame 48 00:04:42,562 --> 00:04:44,928 It's a royal pain in the neck 49 00:04:45,064 --> 00:04:46,725 I knight thee. 50 00:05:08,588 --> 00:05:11,716 If you're filling in for a king, you should look like one. 51 00:05:11,858 --> 00:05:14,918 Can somebody come in and work on Shrek? 52 00:05:16,763 --> 00:05:18,253 I will see what I can do. 53 00:05:39,452 --> 00:05:41,113 Yeah, wow. 54 00:05:41,954 --> 00:05:44,445 Is this really necessary? 55 00:05:45,224 --> 00:05:46,885 Quite necessary, Fiona. 56 00:05:47,026 --> 00:05:49,824 - I'm Shrek, you twit. - Whatever. 57 00:05:49,962 --> 00:05:53,659 This isn't a rehearsal, peoples. Let's see some hustle! 58 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:55,734 Smiles, everyone! Smiles! 59 00:05:55,868 --> 00:05:59,326 I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. 60 00:05:59,472 --> 00:06:02,407 I'm sorry, but can you just try to grin and bear it? 61 00:06:02,542 --> 00:06:04,567 It's just until Dad gets better. 62 00:06:06,646 --> 00:06:07,977 Shrek? 63 00:06:09,315 --> 00:06:10,907 You look handsome. 64 00:06:11,050 --> 00:06:12,984 Come here, you. 65 00:06:27,333 --> 00:06:31,997 My but is itching up a storm and I can't reach it in this monkey suit. 66 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:35,774 Hey, you! Come here. What's your name? 67 00:06:35,908 --> 00:06:38,274 Fiddlesworth, sir. 68 00:06:38,411 --> 00:06:39,503 Perfect. 69 00:06:42,181 --> 00:06:44,547 Ladies and gentlemen... 70 00:06:44,684 --> 00:06:47,847 ...Princess Fiona and Sir Shrek! 71 00:06:52,191 --> 00:06:53,954 Ahh! You've got it. 72 00:06:54,093 --> 00:06:55,617 A little to the left. 73 00:06:56,863 --> 00:06:59,058 That's it! That's good. 74 00:06:59,198 --> 00:07:02,292 Oh, yeah! Scratch that thing! You're on it. 75 00:07:02,435 --> 00:07:03,868 Shrek! 76 00:07:08,774 --> 00:07:09,900 My eye! 77 00:07:10,042 --> 00:07:11,202 What are you doing? 78 00:07:17,783 --> 00:07:18,772 Fiona! 79 00:07:21,888 --> 00:07:25,119 - Are you okay? - Yeah. I'm fine. 80 00:07:28,728 --> 00:07:31,060 Shrimp! My favorite! 81 00:07:41,574 --> 00:07:44,270 - That's it! We're leaving! - Calm down. 82 00:07:44,410 --> 00:07:49,347 Calm down? Who do you think we're kidding? I am an ogre. 83 00:07:49,482 --> 00:07:53,077 I'm not cut out for this, Fiona, and I never will be. 84 00:07:57,156 --> 00:07:58,521 I think that went well. 85 00:07:58,658 --> 00:07:59,886 Donkey! 86 00:08:00,026 --> 00:08:01,755 Come on, Shrek! 87 00:08:02,261 --> 00:08:05,492 Some people just don't understand boundaries. 88 00:08:14,774 --> 00:08:19,370 Just think. A couple more days and we'll be back home... 89 00:08:19,512 --> 00:08:22,811 ...in our vermin-filled shack strewn with fungus... 90 00:08:22,949 --> 00:08:25,850 ...and filled with the rotting stench of mud and neglect. 91 00:08:25,985 --> 00:08:28,613 You had me at "vermin-filled". 92 00:08:29,455 --> 00:08:34,290 And, um... maybe even the pitter-patter of little feet on the floor. 93 00:08:34,794 --> 00:08:37,490 That's right, the swamp rats will be spawning. 94 00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:38,995 Uh, no. 95 00:08:39,131 --> 00:08:42,828 What I'm thinking of is a little bigger than a swamp rat. 96 00:08:42,969 --> 00:08:43,993 Donkey? 97 00:08:44,136 --> 00:08:47,799 No, Shrek. What if, theoretically... 98 00:08:49,075 --> 00:08:51,202 ...they were little ogre feet? 99 00:08:57,650 --> 00:09:01,017 Honey, let's be rational about this. 100 00:09:01,153 --> 00:09:03,519 Have you seen a baby lately? 101 00:09:03,656 --> 00:09:06,853 They just eat and poop, and they cry... 102 00:09:06,993 --> 00:09:10,360 ...then they cry when they poop and poop when they cry. 103 00:09:10,496 --> 00:09:13,294 Now, imagine an ogre baby. 104 00:09:13,432 --> 00:09:17,232 They extra-cry and they extra-poop. 105 00:09:17,370 --> 00:09:20,965 Shrek, don't you ever think about having a family? 106 00:09:21,107 --> 00:09:24,668 Right now, you're my family. 107 00:09:28,681 --> 00:09:30,842 Somebody better be dying. 108 00:09:32,785 --> 00:09:35,015 I'm dying. 109 00:09:37,356 --> 00:09:38,516 Harold? 110 00:09:40,693 --> 00:09:43,787 Don't forget to pay the gardener, Lillian. 111 00:09:43,929 --> 00:09:45,863 Of course, darling. 112 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:48,658 Fiona. 113 00:09:48,801 --> 00:09:50,325 Yes, Daddy? 114 00:09:50,469 --> 00:09:53,199 I know I made many mistakes with you. 115 00:09:54,206 --> 00:09:55,673 It's okay. 116 00:09:55,808 --> 00:09:57,935 But your love for Shrek has... 117 00:09:58,878 --> 00:10:00,277 ...taught me much. 118 00:10:02,415 --> 00:10:04,406 My dear boy... 119 00:10:04,550 --> 00:10:07,815 ...I am proud to call you my son. 120 00:10:07,953 --> 00:10:11,081 And I'm proud to call you my frog... 121 00:10:11,223 --> 00:10:13,657 ...King dad-in-law. 122 00:10:13,793 --> 00:10:19,390 Now there is a matter of business to attend to. 123 00:10:29,742 --> 00:10:32,734 The Frog King... is dead. 124 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:42,888 Put your hat back on, fool. 125 00:10:43,022 --> 00:10:44,614 Shrek... 126 00:10:44,757 --> 00:10:46,418 ...please come hither. 127 00:10:50,262 --> 00:10:51,627 Yeah, Dad? 128 00:10:51,764 --> 00:10:54,927 This kingdom needs a new king. 129 00:10:56,268 --> 00:11:00,932 You and Fiona are next in line for the throne. 130 00:11:02,608 --> 00:11:06,806 Next in line. You see, Dad, that's why people love you. 131 00:11:06,946 --> 00:11:10,279 Even on your deathbed, you're still making jokes. 132 00:11:13,953 --> 00:11:17,650 Come on, Dad. An ogre as king? 133 00:11:17,790 --> 00:11:20,315 That's not such a good idea. 134 00:11:20,459 --> 00:11:23,758 There must be somebody else. Anybody! 135 00:11:23,896 --> 00:11:29,095 Aside from you, there is only one remaining heir. 136 00:11:29,235 --> 00:11:32,432 Really? Who is he, Dad? 137 00:11:32,571 --> 00:11:34,630 His name is... 138 00:11:36,008 --> 00:11:37,066 ...is... 139 00:11:37,209 --> 00:11:38,836 What's his name? 140 00:11:38,978 --> 00:11:40,570 ...is... 141 00:11:42,481 --> 00:11:43,573 Daddy! 142 00:12:00,833 --> 00:12:02,801 His name is Arthur. 143 00:12:02,935 --> 00:12:04,334 Arthur? 144 00:12:08,674 --> 00:12:11,871 I know you'll do... 145 00:12:12,011 --> 00:12:14,673 ...what's right. 146 00:12:17,716 --> 00:12:19,047 Harold? 147 00:12:19,185 --> 00:12:20,743 Dad? Dad! 148 00:12:22,188 --> 00:12:23,416 Dad? 149 00:12:24,023 --> 00:12:25,615 Do your thing, man. 150 00:12:55,554 --> 00:12:59,422 ~ When you were young and your heart ~ 151 00:12:59,558 --> 00:13:01,719 ~ Was an open book ~ 152 00:13:03,729 --> 00:13:07,859 ~ You used to say live and let live ~ 153 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:11,333 ~ You know you did, you know you did You know you did ~ 154 00:13:12,137 --> 00:13:17,200 ~ But if this ever changing world In which we live in ~ 155 00:13:18,077 --> 00:13:22,241 ~ Makes you give in and cry ~ 156 00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:26,911 ~ Say live and let die ~ 157 00:13:30,356 --> 00:13:32,017 ~ Live and let die ~ 158 00:14:08,527 --> 00:14:12,293 ~ Hey, lady You, lady ~ 159 00:14:13,299 --> 00:14:15,460 ~ Cursing at your life ~ 160 00:14:16,135 --> 00:14:18,797 ~ You're a discontented mother ~ 161 00:14:20,472 --> 00:14:23,134 And a regimented wife ~ 162 00:14:48,834 --> 00:14:51,997 What does a prince have to do to get a drink here? 163 00:14:53,339 --> 00:14:55,034 Ah, Mabel! 164 00:14:55,174 --> 00:14:59,577 Why they call you an ugly stepsister, I'll never know. 165 00:15:00,679 --> 00:15:03,773 Where's Doris? Taking the night off? 166 00:15:03,916 --> 00:15:07,682 She's not welcome here, and neither are you. 167 00:15:09,355 --> 00:15:11,380 What do you want, Charming? 168 00:15:11,523 --> 00:15:15,584 Not much. Just a chance at redemption. 169 00:15:17,196 --> 00:15:18,663 And a Fuzzy Navel. 170 00:15:18,797 --> 00:15:21,857 And Fuzzy Navels for all my friends! 171 00:15:26,305 --> 00:15:27,932 We're not your friends. 172 00:15:30,142 --> 00:15:32,269 You don't belong here. 173 00:15:32,411 --> 00:15:36,575 You're absolutely right, but, I mean, do any of us? 174 00:15:36,715 --> 00:15:38,342 Do a number on his face. 175 00:15:38,484 --> 00:15:43,080 Wait, wait, wait! We are more alike than you think. 176 00:15:43,222 --> 00:15:47,124 Wicked Witch! The Seven Dwarfs saved Snow White, and what happened? 177 00:15:47,259 --> 00:15:48,351 Oh, what's it to you? 178 00:15:48,494 --> 00:15:50,758 They left you the unfairest of them all. 179 00:15:50,896 --> 00:15:55,424 Now here you are, hustling pool to get your next meal. 180 00:15:55,567 --> 00:15:57,398 How does that feel? 181 00:16:02,875 --> 00:16:04,467 pretty unfair. 182 00:16:04,610 --> 00:16:06,009 And you! 183 00:16:06,145 --> 00:16:10,775 Your star puppet abandons the show to go and find his father. 184 00:16:12,284 --> 00:16:14,377 I hate that little wooden puppet. 185 00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:16,488 And Hook. 186 00:16:16,622 --> 00:16:18,214 Need I say more? 187 00:16:21,927 --> 00:16:24,691 - And you, Frumpypigskin! - Rumpelstiltskin. 188 00:16:24,830 --> 00:16:27,458 Where's that firstborn you were promised? 189 00:16:29,868 --> 00:16:33,770 Mabel. Remember how you couldn't get your little fat foot... 190 00:16:33,906 --> 00:16:35,806 ...into that tiny glass slipper? 191 00:16:38,477 --> 00:16:42,004 Cinderella is in Far Far Away right now... 192 00:16:42,147 --> 00:16:47,175 ...eating bonbons, cavorting with every last fairy tale creature... 193 00:16:47,319 --> 00:16:49,787 ...that has ever done you wrong! 194 00:16:49,922 --> 00:16:54,859 Once upon a time, someone decided that we were the losers. 195 00:16:54,993 --> 00:16:57,860 But there are two sides to every story... 196 00:16:58,030 --> 00:17:00,555 ...and our side has not been told! 197 00:17:00,699 --> 00:17:05,568 So who will join me? Who wants to come out on top for once? 198 00:17:05,704 --> 00:17:07,365 Who wants their... 199 00:17:07,506 --> 00:17:10,669 ..."happily ever after"? 200 00:17:27,860 --> 00:17:29,521 This way, gents. 201 00:17:40,873 --> 00:17:45,901 It's out of my hands, seņorita. The winds of fate have blown on my destiny. 202 00:17:46,044 --> 00:17:49,844 But I will never forget you. You are the love of my life. 203 00:17:49,982 --> 00:17:52,416 As are you. 204 00:17:52,551 --> 00:17:54,917 And, uh, you. 205 00:17:55,053 --> 00:17:58,216 I don't know you, but I'd like to. 206 00:17:59,391 --> 00:18:00,722 I got to go! 207 00:18:02,127 --> 00:18:03,822 I don't wanna leave you either. 208 00:18:03,962 --> 00:18:06,795 But you know how Shrek is. The dude's lost without me. 209 00:18:07,733 --> 00:18:11,066 But don't worry. I'll send you airmail kisses every day! 210 00:18:12,404 --> 00:18:13,769 Be strong, babies. 211 00:18:13,906 --> 00:18:16,340 Coco, Peanut, listen to your mama. 212 00:18:16,475 --> 00:18:20,468 Bananas, no roasting marshmallows on your sister's head. 213 00:18:22,481 --> 00:18:24,108 That's my special boy! 214 00:18:24,249 --> 00:18:27,343 Come here, all of you! Give your daddy a big hug! 215 00:18:33,926 --> 00:18:35,257 Shrek? 216 00:18:36,261 --> 00:18:40,561 Maybe you should just stay and be King. 217 00:18:40,699 --> 00:18:44,226 Come on. There's no way I could ever run a kingdom. 218 00:18:44,369 --> 00:18:47,361 That's why your cousin Arthur is a perfect choice. 219 00:18:47,506 --> 00:18:50,031 It's not that, no. You see... 220 00:18:50,175 --> 00:18:54,635 And if he gives me any trouble, I always have persuasion and reason. 221 00:18:54,780 --> 00:18:58,113 Here's persuasion... and here's reason. 222 00:19:00,519 --> 00:19:01,918 Fiona... 223 00:19:02,054 --> 00:19:05,319 ...soon it's just going to be you, me... 224 00:19:05,457 --> 00:19:07,118 ...and our swamp. 225 00:19:08,961 --> 00:19:11,452 It's not going to be just you and me. 226 00:19:12,731 --> 00:19:14,631 All aboard! 227 00:19:15,801 --> 00:19:18,634 It will be. I promise. 228 00:19:19,805 --> 00:19:21,295 I love you. 229 00:19:27,913 --> 00:19:29,574 That's lovely. 230 00:19:29,715 --> 00:19:31,307 Bye-bye, babies! 231 00:19:38,890 --> 00:19:40,084 Shrek! 232 00:19:41,326 --> 00:19:43,521 - Wait! - What is it? 233 00:19:43,662 --> 00:19:45,152 I'm... I'm... 234 00:19:49,167 --> 00:19:51,032 I love you, too, honey! 235 00:19:51,169 --> 00:19:54,002 No! I said I'm... 236 00:19:57,009 --> 00:19:58,442 You're what? 237 00:19:58,577 --> 00:20:01,011 I said I'm pregnant! 238 00:20:05,183 --> 00:20:06,650 What was that? 239 00:20:06,785 --> 00:20:09,845 You're going to be a father! 240 00:20:11,690 --> 00:20:13,487 That's great! 241 00:20:13,625 --> 00:20:16,890 Really? I'm glad you think so! 242 00:20:17,029 --> 00:20:18,428 I love you! 243 00:20:18,563 --> 00:20:20,554 Yeah! 244 00:20:20,699 --> 00:20:23,031 Me, too! You! 245 00:20:26,905 --> 00:20:30,397 I'm going to be an uncle! I'm going to be an uncle! 246 00:20:30,542 --> 00:20:33,602 And you, my friend, are royally... 247 00:21:12,317 --> 00:21:13,306 Home. 248 00:21:25,597 --> 00:21:26,928 Shrek! 249 00:21:29,267 --> 00:21:30,598 Fiona! 250 00:21:34,606 --> 00:21:35,937 Fiona? 251 00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:56,559 Oh, no. 252 00:21:59,731 --> 00:22:02,632 better out than in, I always say. 253 00:22:12,310 --> 00:22:13,641 No, no, no! 254 00:22:15,814 --> 00:22:18,374 It's okay. It's gonna be all right. 255 00:22:23,655 --> 00:22:25,816 Stop! Hey, wait! 256 00:23:15,207 --> 00:23:16,731 Donkey. Donkey! 257 00:23:16,875 --> 00:23:18,103 Wake up! 258 00:23:20,545 --> 00:23:21,876 Dada! 259 00:23:24,316 --> 00:23:26,307 Shrek! You okay? 260 00:23:28,053 --> 00:23:33,582 I can't believe I'm going to be a father. How did this happen? 261 00:23:33,725 --> 00:23:37,923 Allow me to explain. You see, when a man has a certain feeling for a woman... 262 00:23:38,063 --> 00:23:40,588 ...a powerful urge sweeps over him. 263 00:23:40,732 --> 00:23:43,223 I know how it happened. 264 00:23:44,069 --> 00:23:46,128 I just can't believe it. 265 00:23:48,907 --> 00:23:50,738 How does it happen? 266 00:23:57,749 --> 00:24:03,016 ~ And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon ~ 267 00:24:03,154 --> 00:24:05,782 ~ Little Boy Blue and the Man in the Moon ~ 268 00:24:05,924 --> 00:24:08,518 ~ When you coming home, son? I don't know when ~ 269 00:24:08,660 --> 00:24:10,958 ~ But we'll get together then, Dad. ~ 270 00:24:11,096 --> 00:24:13,087 Donkey! Can you just cut to the part 271 00:24:13,231 --> 00:24:15,756 where you're supposed to make me feel better? 272 00:24:16,501 --> 00:24:19,026 You know I love Fiona, boss. Right? 273 00:24:19,170 --> 00:24:23,231 What I am talking about here is you, me, my cousin's boat... 274 00:24:23,375 --> 00:24:28,972 ...an ice cold pitcher of mojitos and two weeks of nothing but fishing. 275 00:24:29,114 --> 00:24:30,979 Don't listen to him! 276 00:24:31,116 --> 00:24:33,812 Having a baby is not going to ruin your life. 277 00:24:33,952 --> 00:24:38,480 It's not my life I'm worried about ruining, it's the kid's. 278 00:24:38,623 --> 00:24:42,923 I mean, when have you ever heard the phrase "as sweet as an ogre"... 279 00:24:43,061 --> 00:24:45,495 ...or "as nurturing as an ogre"... 280 00:24:45,630 --> 00:24:49,999 ...or how about "You're gonna love my dad. He's a real ogre." 281 00:24:50,135 --> 00:24:51,898 Okay. Okay. I get it. 282 00:24:52,037 --> 00:24:55,495 But nobody said it's going to be easy. But at least you got us to help you. 283 00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:57,335 That's true. 284 00:24:57,475 --> 00:24:58,942 I'm doomed. 285 00:24:59,077 --> 00:25:00,738 You'll be fine. 286 00:25:01,646 --> 00:25:03,546 You're finished. 287 00:25:05,817 --> 00:25:08,479 Uh, with your journey. 288 00:25:16,661 --> 00:25:21,098 "Wor-ces-ters-shiree"? Now that sounds fancy! 289 00:25:21,232 --> 00:25:22,563 It's Worcestershire. 290 00:25:22,701 --> 00:25:24,532 Like the sauce? Hmmmmmm ! 291 00:25:24,669 --> 00:25:26,000 It's spicy! 292 00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:31,672 Oh, they must be expecting us. 293 00:25:37,582 --> 00:25:40,380 What in the shista-shire kind of place is this? 294 00:25:40,518 --> 00:25:45,717 Well, my stomach aches and my palms just got sweaty. Must be a high school. 295 00:25:45,857 --> 00:25:47,017 High school? 296 00:25:47,158 --> 00:25:48,716 Ready? Okay! 297 00:25:48,860 --> 00:25:51,294 Wherefore art thou headed, to the top? 298 00:25:51,429 --> 00:25:55,388 Yeah, we think so, we think so! And dost thou thinkest thine can be stopped? 299 00:25:55,533 --> 00:25:58,001 Nay, we thinkst not, we thinkst not! 300 00:26:03,274 --> 00:26:07,267 All right, Mr. Percival, ease up on the reins. 301 00:26:10,615 --> 00:26:14,312 For lo, bro, don't burn all my frankincense and myrrh. 302 00:26:14,452 --> 00:26:17,944 I'm feeling nauseous from memories of wedgies and swirlies! 303 00:26:18,089 --> 00:26:22,753 How did you receive wedgies when you are clearly not the wearer of the underpants? 304 00:26:22,894 --> 00:26:25,795 Let's just say some things are better left unsaid. 305 00:26:25,930 --> 00:26:29,991 So I was all like, "I'd rather get the black plague than go out with you." 306 00:26:30,135 --> 00:26:32,467 - Oh, totally. - Pardon me. 307 00:26:32,604 --> 00:26:35,402 - Totally ew-eth. - Yeah, totally. 308 00:26:37,008 --> 00:26:39,602 I just altered my character level to +3 superb-ability. 309 00:26:39,744 --> 00:26:42,304 Hi. We're looking for someone named... 310 00:26:42,447 --> 00:26:46,975 Who rolled a +9 dork spell and summoned the beast and his quadruped? 311 00:26:48,820 --> 00:26:53,314 I know you're busy not fiting in, but can either of you tell me where I can find Arthur? 312 00:26:53,458 --> 00:26:54,755 He's over there. 313 00:27:14,946 --> 00:27:19,349 There is no sweeter taste on thy tongue than victory! 314 00:27:21,786 --> 00:27:24,653 Strong, handsome, face of a leader. 315 00:27:24,789 --> 00:27:28,122 Does Arthur look like a king or what? 316 00:27:29,294 --> 00:27:30,625 Sorry. 317 00:27:31,362 --> 00:27:33,990 Did you say you were looking for Arthur? 318 00:27:34,132 --> 00:27:36,566 That information is on a need-to-know basis. 319 00:27:36,701 --> 00:27:38,396 It's top secret! 320 00:27:38,536 --> 00:27:42,131 Now, gentlemen, let's away. To the showers! 321 00:27:44,642 --> 00:27:46,269 Greetings, Your Majesty. 322 00:27:46,411 --> 00:27:47,969 This is your lucky day. 323 00:27:48,813 --> 00:27:50,906 What are you supposed to be? 324 00:27:51,049 --> 00:27:54,314 Some kind of giant mutant leprechaun or something? 325 00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:58,812 Giant mutant... You made a funny. 326 00:27:59,324 --> 00:28:01,258 Unhand me, monster! 327 00:28:01,392 --> 00:28:03,360 Stop squirming, Arthur. 328 00:28:03,495 --> 00:28:05,827 I'm not Arthur. 329 00:28:07,832 --> 00:28:10,357 I am Lancelot. 330 00:28:10,502 --> 00:28:13,164 That dork over there is Arthur. 331 00:28:19,244 --> 00:28:21,439 This is, like, totally embarrassing... 332 00:28:21,579 --> 00:28:24,173 ...but Tiffany thinkest thou vex her so soothly. 333 00:28:24,315 --> 00:28:27,716 She thought perchance thou would ask her to the Homecoming Dance. 334 00:28:27,852 --> 00:28:28,944 Excuse me? 335 00:28:29,087 --> 00:28:33,023 Like, whatever. She's totally into college guys and mythical creatures. 336 00:28:36,461 --> 00:28:38,554 Oh, Arthur... 337 00:28:38,696 --> 00:28:42,393 ...come out, come out, wherever you are! 338 00:28:44,435 --> 00:28:47,063 You better run, you little punk no-goodniks! 339 00:28:47,205 --> 00:28:50,606 The days of Donkey Dumpy Drawers are over! 340 00:28:56,714 --> 00:28:58,045 Hold it. 341 00:28:58,716 --> 00:29:00,775 We're here for the mascot contest. 342 00:29:05,456 --> 00:29:08,653 We're here for the mascot contest, too. 343 00:29:08,793 --> 00:29:11,318 This is a costume? 344 00:29:11,462 --> 00:29:13,453 Worked on it all night long. 345 00:29:14,799 --> 00:29:16,596 Looks pretty real to me. 346 00:29:16,734 --> 00:29:19,134 If he were real, could I do this? 347 00:29:20,805 --> 00:29:22,466 Or this? 348 00:29:23,741 --> 00:29:28,610 If it were real, that would have been agonizingly painful. 349 00:29:28,746 --> 00:29:31,943 - Now watch this! - That's quite enough, boys. 350 00:29:32,083 --> 00:29:35,883 Thank you to Professor Primbotom and his lecture... 351 00:29:36,020 --> 00:29:37,419 ...on "just say nay". 352 00:29:38,356 --> 00:29:42,622 And now, without further ado, let's give a warm Worcestershire hoozah... 353 00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:46,252 ...to the winner of our mascot contest, the... 354 00:29:47,432 --> 00:29:48,421 ...ogre? 355 00:29:50,501 --> 00:29:52,799 That's right. I'm the new mascot. 356 00:29:52,937 --> 00:29:56,566 So let's really try and beat the other guys at... 357 00:29:56,708 --> 00:29:59,836 ...whatever it is they're doing! 358 00:30:03,381 --> 00:30:06,373 This is all a bit unorthodox... 359 00:30:06,517 --> 00:30:10,180 Where can I find Arthur Pendragon? 360 00:30:12,457 --> 00:30:13,947 Hey, wait... 361 00:30:18,062 --> 00:30:19,689 Classic. 362 00:30:19,831 --> 00:30:21,526 You should be ashamed of yourself! 363 00:30:21,666 --> 00:30:24,066 I didn't do it. They did. 364 00:30:28,873 --> 00:30:30,602 Please don't eat me. 365 00:30:30,742 --> 00:30:33,074 Eat him! Eat him! Eat him! 366 00:30:34,078 --> 00:30:36,740 I'm not here to eat him! 367 00:30:38,216 --> 00:30:40,844 Time to pack up your toothbrush and jammies. 368 00:30:40,985 --> 00:30:43,215 You're the new King of Far Far Away. 369 00:30:43,354 --> 00:30:45,015 What? 370 00:30:46,557 --> 00:30:50,755 Artie a king? More like the Mayor of Loserville! 371 00:30:55,500 --> 00:30:56,489 Burn. 372 00:31:00,104 --> 00:31:01,230 Is this for real? 373 00:31:01,372 --> 00:31:05,775 Absolutely. Clean out your locker, kid. You got a kingdom to run. 374 00:31:05,910 --> 00:31:08,572 So, wait... l'm really the only heir? 375 00:31:09,914 --> 00:31:11,245 The one and only. 376 00:31:12,583 --> 00:31:14,244 Give me... just a second. 377 00:31:16,587 --> 00:31:18,248 My good people... 378 00:31:18,389 --> 00:31:21,119 ...I think there's a lesson here for all of us. 379 00:31:21,259 --> 00:31:25,559 Maybe the next time you're about to dunk a kid's head in a chamber pot, you'll stop and think, 380 00:31:25,697 --> 00:31:28,188 "Hey, maybe this guy has feelings. 381 00:31:28,933 --> 00:31:31,299 Maybe I should cut him some slack. 382 00:31:31,436 --> 00:31:34,803 'Cause maybe... just maybe... 383 00:31:34,939 --> 00:31:38,636 ...this guy's gonna turn out to be, I don't know, a king? 384 00:31:38,776 --> 00:31:43,804 And maybe his first royal decree will be to banish everyone who ever picked on him." 385 00:31:43,948 --> 00:31:46,815 That's right, I'm looking at you, jousting team! 386 00:31:47,151 --> 00:31:50,348 And Guin? Oh, Guin. 387 00:31:51,222 --> 00:31:52,553 I've always loved you. 388 00:31:54,425 --> 00:31:56,985 Good friends, it breaks my heart, but... 389 00:31:57,128 --> 00:32:00,620 ...enjoy your stay here in prison while I rule the free world baby! 390 00:32:00,765 --> 00:32:02,357 Okay, let's not overdo it. 391 00:32:02,500 --> 00:32:05,833 I'm building my city, people... on rock 'n' roll! 392 00:32:05,970 --> 00:32:07,835 You just overdid it. 393 00:32:16,981 --> 00:32:18,608 Look at you! 394 00:32:18,750 --> 00:32:20,274 You look darling. 395 00:32:20,418 --> 00:32:22,613 Just precious. Look at her. 396 00:32:22,754 --> 00:32:25,120 Any cravings since you got pregnant? 397 00:32:25,256 --> 00:32:27,884 No. Not at all. 398 00:32:28,726 --> 00:32:30,455 Do you smell ham? 399 00:32:30,595 --> 00:32:33,723 It's present time! 400 00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:39,661 Fiona, please open mine first. It's... It's the one in front. 401 00:32:39,804 --> 00:32:44,434 "Congratulations on your new mess mak..." Oh, mess maker! 402 00:32:44,575 --> 00:32:47,567 "Hopefully this helps. Love, Cinderella." 403 00:32:48,913 --> 00:32:50,574 - Look at that! - What is it? 404 00:32:52,150 --> 00:32:54,618 It's for the poopies. 405 00:32:54,752 --> 00:32:56,310 Wait... babies poop? 406 00:32:56,454 --> 00:32:57,785 Everyone poops, Beauty. 407 00:32:57,922 --> 00:32:59,389 Fiona! 408 00:32:59,524 --> 00:33:02,357 We all chipped in for a little present, too. 409 00:33:03,261 --> 00:33:04,819 Ta-da! 410 00:33:06,030 --> 00:33:08,863 You know the baby's gonna love it, because I do! 411 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,969 Guys, that's so sweet. Thank you. 412 00:33:12,103 --> 00:33:13,502 Who's this one from? 413 00:33:13,638 --> 00:33:16,573 I got you the biggest one, because I love you most. 414 00:33:16,707 --> 00:33:19,767 "Have one on me. Love, Snow White." 415 00:33:22,613 --> 00:33:24,240 What is it? 416 00:33:24,382 --> 00:33:25,906 He's a live-in babysitter. 417 00:33:26,050 --> 00:33:27,142 Where's the baby? 418 00:33:27,285 --> 00:33:31,346 You're too kind, Snow, but I can't accept this. 419 00:33:31,489 --> 00:33:33,855 It's nothing. I have six more at home. 420 00:33:33,991 --> 00:33:35,754 - What does he do? - The cleaning. 421 00:33:35,893 --> 00:33:37,485 - The feeding. - The burping. 422 00:33:37,628 --> 00:33:40,096 So, what are Shrek and I supposed to do? 423 00:33:40,231 --> 00:33:42,358 Now you have plenty of time to work on your marriage. 424 00:33:42,500 --> 00:33:46,368 Thanks, Rapunzel. What's that supposed to mean? 425 00:33:46,504 --> 00:33:50,531 Come on now, Fiona. You know what happens. 426 00:33:51,476 --> 00:33:53,501 You're tired all the time. 427 00:33:53,644 --> 00:33:55,373 You start leting yourself go. 428 00:33:55,513 --> 00:33:56,673 Stretch marks. 429 00:33:56,814 --> 00:33:58,145 Say goodbye to romance. 430 00:34:00,485 --> 00:34:03,921 I'm sorry, but how many of you have kids? 431 00:34:04,055 --> 00:34:05,613 She's right! 432 00:34:05,756 --> 00:34:10,193 A baby will only strengthen the love Shrek and Fiona have. 433 00:34:10,328 --> 00:34:13,161 How did Shrek react when you told him? Tell me! 434 00:34:14,332 --> 00:34:17,495 When he first found out, Shrek said... 435 00:34:30,348 --> 00:34:34,682 Onward, my new friends! To our happily ever afters! 436 00:34:40,358 --> 00:34:42,519 Now... bombs away! 437 00:34:59,043 --> 00:35:01,910 Well, well, well. If it isn't Peter Pan. 438 00:35:02,046 --> 00:35:04,514 - His name's not Peter. - Shut it, Wendy. 439 00:35:23,067 --> 00:35:26,730 Enough pillaging! To the castle! 440 00:35:45,089 --> 00:35:46,556 You go! Take care of the baby! 441 00:35:46,691 --> 00:35:49,854 Everybody stay calm! We're all going to die! 442 00:35:54,265 --> 00:35:56,392 Everyone in! Now! 443 00:35:56,534 --> 00:35:58,661 Come on! Put some back into it! 444 00:36:02,006 --> 00:36:03,496 We don't have time. Now go! 445 00:36:03,641 --> 00:36:05,438 Quickly, ladies! 446 00:36:07,712 --> 00:36:09,270 We'll hold them off as long as we can! 447 00:36:24,962 --> 00:36:27,362 Where are Shrek and Fiona? 448 00:36:27,498 --> 00:36:29,659 The name doesn't ring a bell. 449 00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:31,495 No bell. 450 00:36:31,636 --> 00:36:35,003 I suggest you freaks cooperate... 451 00:36:35,139 --> 00:36:37,733 ...with the new King of Far Far Away! 452 00:36:37,875 --> 00:36:41,572 The only thing you're ever gonna be king of is King of the Stupids! 453 00:36:41,712 --> 00:36:44,010 - Hook! - Right! 454 00:36:44,148 --> 00:36:46,378 Avast, ye cookie. 455 00:36:48,986 --> 00:36:50,647 Start talking. 456 00:36:55,026 --> 00:36:56,516 - Gingy! - Papa! 457 00:36:56,661 --> 00:36:58,026 Setle down now. 458 00:37:12,009 --> 00:37:15,308 On the good ship Lollipop 459 00:37:15,446 --> 00:37:18,882 It's a sweet trip to the candy shop 460 00:37:19,016 --> 00:37:20,005 You! 461 00:37:20,851 --> 00:37:23,046 You can't lie. 462 00:37:23,187 --> 00:37:26,850 So tell me, puppet... where is Shrek? 463 00:37:29,860 --> 00:37:33,091 Well... I don't know where he's not. 464 00:37:33,230 --> 00:37:35,425 You don't know where Shrek is? 465 00:37:35,566 --> 00:37:38,160 It wouldn't be inaccurate to assume... 466 00:37:38,302 --> 00:37:42,568 ...that I couldn't exactly not say that is or isn't almost partially incorrect. 467 00:37:42,707 --> 00:37:44,072 So you do know where he is! 468 00:37:44,208 --> 00:37:46,733 On the contrary, I'm possibly more or less 469 00:37:46,877 --> 00:37:49,107 not definitely rejecting the idea 470 00:37:49,246 --> 00:37:52,909 that in no way, with any amount of uncertainty... 471 00:37:53,050 --> 00:37:54,039 Stop it! 472 00:37:54,185 --> 00:37:56,312 ...I do not know where he shouldn't probably be. 473 00:37:56,454 --> 00:37:58,922 If that indeed wasn't where he isn't. 474 00:37:59,056 --> 00:38:02,651 Even if he wasn't not where I knew he was, it could mean... 475 00:38:02,793 --> 00:38:05,023 On the good ship Lollipop 476 00:38:05,162 --> 00:38:09,565 Enough! Shrek went off to bring back the next heir! 477 00:38:12,570 --> 00:38:14,367 He's bringing back the next heir? 478 00:38:14,505 --> 00:38:15,995 No! 479 00:38:17,241 --> 00:38:20,438 Hook! Get rid of this new "King". 480 00:38:20,578 --> 00:38:22,443 But bring Shrek to me. 481 00:38:22,580 --> 00:38:25,777 I have something special in mind for him. 482 00:38:25,916 --> 00:38:28,077 He'll never fall for your tricks! 483 00:38:29,754 --> 00:38:31,415 Oh, boy. 484 00:38:41,265 --> 00:38:44,291 I can't believe it. Me, a king? 485 00:38:44,435 --> 00:38:47,461 I knew I came from royalty and all, but... 486 00:38:47,605 --> 00:38:49,698 ...I figured everyone forgot about me. 487 00:38:49,840 --> 00:38:53,571 Oh, no. In fact the King asked for you personally. 488 00:38:53,711 --> 00:38:56,271 Really? Wow. 489 00:38:57,615 --> 00:38:59,845 But I know it's not all fun and games. 490 00:38:59,984 --> 00:39:02,976 It really is all fun and games, actually. 491 00:39:03,120 --> 00:39:06,715 Sure, you have to knight a few heroes, launch a ship or two. 492 00:39:06,857 --> 00:39:11,191 By the way, make sure you hit the boat just right with the bottle. 493 00:39:11,328 --> 00:39:14,126 Any idiot can hit a boat with the bottle. 494 00:39:14,965 --> 00:39:17,900 Well, I've heard it's harder than it looks. 495 00:39:18,035 --> 00:39:20,003 This is going to be huge. 496 00:39:20,137 --> 00:39:25,006 Parties, princesses, castles. Princesses. 497 00:39:25,142 --> 00:39:28,009 You'll be living in the lap of luxury. 498 00:39:28,145 --> 00:39:30,613 The got the finest chefs will wait for your order. 499 00:39:30,748 --> 00:39:33,717 And fortunately, you'll have the royal food tasters. 500 00:39:33,851 --> 00:39:35,546 What do they do? 501 00:39:35,686 --> 00:39:40,282 Taste the food before the King eats, to make sure it's not poisoned. 502 00:39:40,424 --> 00:39:43,018 - Poisoned? - Or too salty. 503 00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:46,687 Don't worry about it. Your bodyguards will keep you safe. 504 00:39:46,831 --> 00:39:49,095 All of them willing at a moment's notice 505 00:39:49,233 --> 00:39:52,066 to lay down their lives out of devotion to you. 506 00:39:52,203 --> 00:39:53,636 Really? 507 00:39:53,771 --> 00:39:56,797 The whole kingdom will look to you for wisdom and guidance. 508 00:39:57,174 --> 00:39:59,108 Make sure they don't die of famine! 509 00:39:59,243 --> 00:40:00,972 - Or plague. - Plague is bad. 510 00:40:01,111 --> 00:40:04,012 The coughing, the groaning, the festering sores. 511 00:40:05,583 --> 00:40:10,020 Festering sores! You are one funny kity cat. 512 00:40:10,688 --> 00:40:12,087 What did I say? 513 00:40:12,223 --> 00:40:14,589 We don't want Artie geting the wrong idea. 514 00:40:15,359 --> 00:40:16,519 Artie? 515 00:40:20,798 --> 00:40:22,561 There goes my hip! 516 00:40:22,700 --> 00:40:24,861 Artie! What are you doing? 517 00:40:26,804 --> 00:40:28,931 What does it look like?! 518 00:40:31,609 --> 00:40:34,077 This really isn't up to you. 519 00:40:34,211 --> 00:40:37,078 I don't know anything about being king! 520 00:40:37,214 --> 00:40:39,148 You'll learn on the job! 521 00:40:41,051 --> 00:40:43,576 Sorry to disapoint you, but I'm going back. 522 00:40:43,721 --> 00:40:46,155 Back to what? Being a loser? 523 00:40:49,727 --> 00:40:51,285 Now look what you did! 524 00:40:52,062 --> 00:40:55,896 Look what I did? Who's holding the wheel, chief? 525 00:40:56,901 --> 00:40:58,391 Shrek! 526 00:41:10,748 --> 00:41:12,739 Land ho! 527 00:41:25,262 --> 00:41:27,093 How humiliating. 528 00:41:28,098 --> 00:41:31,033 Oh, nice going, Your Highness. 529 00:41:31,168 --> 00:41:34,865 Now it's "Your Highness"? What happened to "loser"? 530 00:41:35,005 --> 00:41:37,906 If you think this is geting you out of anything, well it isn't. 531 00:41:38,042 --> 00:41:41,808 We're heading back to Far Far Away one way or another... 532 00:41:41,946 --> 00:41:44,380 ...and you're going to be a father! 533 00:41:44,515 --> 00:41:45,948 What? 534 00:41:46,784 --> 00:41:48,342 You just said "father". 535 00:41:48,485 --> 00:41:51,215 King! You're going to be king! 536 00:41:51,355 --> 00:41:54,347 "You're going to be king!" Yeah, right. 537 00:41:55,559 --> 00:41:56,992 Where do you think you are going? 538 00:41:57,127 --> 00:41:59,595 Far Far Away... from you! 539 00:41:59,730 --> 00:42:01,698 You get back here, young man, and I mean it ! 540 00:42:03,667 --> 00:42:06,158 Boss? I don't think he's coming back. 541 00:42:06,303 --> 00:42:09,500 Maybe it's for the best. He's not exactly king material. 542 00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:12,871 When did you plan to tell him you were supposed to be king? 543 00:42:13,010 --> 00:42:15,843 Come on. Why would I do that? 544 00:42:15,980 --> 00:42:19,040 Besides, he'll be ten times better at it than me. 545 00:42:19,183 --> 00:42:23,142 Then you're gonna change your tactics if you want to get anywhere with him. 546 00:42:25,489 --> 00:42:27,320 You're right, Donkey. 547 00:42:29,660 --> 00:42:31,184 What about this? 548 00:42:31,328 --> 00:42:35,162 - Shrek! - Come on. It's just a joke. 549 00:42:36,734 --> 00:42:38,065 Still... 550 00:42:54,852 --> 00:42:56,513 Listen, Artie. 551 00:42:57,087 --> 00:43:02,218 If you think this whole mad scene ain't dope, I feel you, dude. 552 00:43:02,359 --> 00:43:06,489 I'm not trying to get up in your grill or raise your roof, or whatever. 553 00:43:06,630 --> 00:43:08,757 But what I am screamin' is, yo... 554 00:43:08,899 --> 00:43:12,096 ...check out this kazing thazing, bazaby! 555 00:43:12,236 --> 00:43:14,329 If it doesn't groove, or what I'm saying 556 00:43:14,471 --> 00:43:17,406 ain't straight trippin', say, "Oh, no, you didn't! 557 00:43:17,541 --> 00:43:19,975 You're getting on my last nerve." 558 00:43:20,110 --> 00:43:23,102 And then I'll know it's... I'll know it's wack! 559 00:43:24,715 --> 00:43:25,909 Somebody, help! 560 00:43:26,050 --> 00:43:29,451 I've been kidnapped by a monster who's trying to relate to me! 561 00:43:29,586 --> 00:43:33,215 - Artie, wait. - Come on! Help! Hello? 562 00:43:34,725 --> 00:43:38,422 Greetings, cosmic children of the universe. 563 00:43:38,562 --> 00:43:40,496 Welcome to my serenity circle. 564 00:43:40,631 --> 00:43:44,761 Please leave any bad vibes outside the healing vortex. 565 00:43:44,902 --> 00:43:46,733 Now prepare to... 566 00:43:52,409 --> 00:43:55,242 I knew I should have got that warranty! 567 00:43:58,148 --> 00:43:59,615 Mr. Merlin? 568 00:43:59,750 --> 00:44:01,217 You know this guy? 569 00:44:01,351 --> 00:44:05,617 Yeah. He was the school magic teacher, until he had his nervous breakdown. 570 00:44:05,756 --> 00:44:09,123 Technically, I was merely a victim of a level 3 fatigue. 571 00:44:09,259 --> 00:44:11,352 At the request of my therapist, 572 00:44:11,495 --> 00:44:15,124 and the school authorities, I retired to the tranquility of nature 573 00:44:15,265 --> 00:44:17,426 to discover my divine purpose. 574 00:44:18,936 --> 00:44:22,337 Now, can I interest anyone in a snack or beverage? 575 00:44:22,473 --> 00:44:23,565 Uh, no. 576 00:44:23,707 --> 00:44:27,040 Sure you don't want to try my famous Rock Au Gratin? 577 00:44:29,947 --> 00:44:31,414 It's organic. 578 00:44:31,548 --> 00:44:33,982 Thanks. I just ate a boulder on the way in. 579 00:44:34,118 --> 00:44:37,053 What we need, are directions back back to Far Far Away. 580 00:44:37,187 --> 00:44:39,712 "We"? Who said I was going with you? 581 00:44:39,857 --> 00:44:44,226 I did. People are counting on you, so don't try to weasel out of it. 582 00:44:44,361 --> 00:44:46,420 If it's such a great job, you do it. 583 00:44:46,964 --> 00:44:51,230 Understand this, kid. It's no more Mr. Nice Guy from here on out. 584 00:44:51,368 --> 00:44:53,666 So, that was your Mr. Nice Guy? 585 00:44:53,804 --> 00:44:55,738 Yeah, and I'm going to miss him. 586 00:44:55,873 --> 00:45:00,276 You know what ? Why don't you go terrorize a village and leave me alone! 587 00:45:00,410 --> 00:45:04,938 Was that a crack about ogres? You get your royal highness to Far Far Away... 588 00:45:05,082 --> 00:45:09,109 ...before I kick it there! Now, which way am I kicking? 589 00:45:09,253 --> 00:45:11,084 I could have tell you, but since you're 590 00:45:11,221 --> 00:45:13,746 in the midst of a self-destructive rage spiral, 591 00:45:13,891 --> 00:45:16,416 it would be karmically irresponsible. 592 00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:20,223 Self-destructive? Look, are you going to help us or not? 593 00:45:20,364 --> 00:45:22,958 Most definitely, but only after you 594 00:45:23,100 --> 00:45:26,297 take the journey to your soul! 595 00:45:26,436 --> 00:45:27,801 Yeah, I don't think so. 596 00:45:27,938 --> 00:45:31,772 It's either that or some primal scream therapy. 597 00:45:33,844 --> 00:45:36,506 All right, all right. Journey to the soul. 598 00:45:37,347 --> 00:45:39,212 Now, all of you, 599 00:45:39,349 --> 00:45:41,874 look into the Fire of Truth 600 00:45:42,019 --> 00:45:45,011 and tell me what you see. 601 00:45:47,858 --> 00:45:49,723 Ooh, charades! 602 00:45:49,860 --> 00:45:54,627 Okay, I see a Dutch fudge torte with cinnamon swirls! 603 00:45:54,765 --> 00:45:57,359 Okay, monster... go for it. 604 00:46:06,043 --> 00:46:07,738 I see a rainbow pony. 605 00:46:07,878 --> 00:46:09,812 Excellent work! Now the boy. 606 00:46:09,947 --> 00:46:11,414 This is lame. 607 00:46:11,548 --> 00:46:13,812 You're lame! Now just go for it. 608 00:46:15,385 --> 00:46:16,716 Okay. 609 00:46:17,554 --> 00:46:21,991 There's a baby bird and a father bird siting in a nest. 610 00:46:22,125 --> 00:46:24,116 Yes! Stay with it! 611 00:46:24,962 --> 00:46:28,955 The dad just flew away. Why did he leave the little bird all alone? 612 00:46:29,633 --> 00:46:33,069 It's trying to fly, but it doesn't know how to. 613 00:46:33,971 --> 00:46:36,132 It's going to fall! 614 00:46:40,978 --> 00:46:44,971 Proper head case you are. Really messed up. 615 00:46:48,318 --> 00:46:53,312 Okay, I get it. The bird's me. My dad left. So what? 616 00:47:05,335 --> 00:47:07,997 Look, Artie, um... 617 00:47:12,342 --> 00:47:15,106 Just thought I'd help set the mood... 618 00:47:15,245 --> 00:47:18,578 ...for your big heart-to-heart chat. 619 00:47:27,024 --> 00:47:30,357 I know what it's like to not feel ready for something. 620 00:47:32,696 --> 00:47:35,028 Even ogres get scared. 621 00:47:35,866 --> 00:47:38,699 You know... once in a while. 622 00:47:40,704 --> 00:47:44,470 I know you want me to be king, but I can't. 623 00:47:44,608 --> 00:47:47,475 I'm not cut out for it, and I never will be, all right? 624 00:47:48,378 --> 00:47:50,869 Even my own dad knew I wasn't worth the trouble. 625 00:47:51,014 --> 00:47:54,211 He dumped me at that school the first chance he got... 626 00:47:54,885 --> 00:47:57,217 ...and I never heard from him again. 627 00:47:58,889 --> 00:48:02,723 My dad wasn't really the fatherly type, either. 628 00:48:03,226 --> 00:48:05,387 Well, I doubt he was worse than mine. 629 00:48:06,229 --> 00:48:07,526 Oh, yeah? 630 00:48:07,664 --> 00:48:11,725 My father was an ogre. He tried to eat me. 631 00:48:12,569 --> 00:48:14,764 Now I guess I should have seen it coming. 632 00:48:14,905 --> 00:48:19,171 He bathed me in barbecue sauce and put me to bed with an apple in my mouth. 633 00:48:21,078 --> 00:48:23,569 Okay, I guess that's pretty bad. 634 00:48:25,916 --> 00:48:28,111 you know, it may be hard to believe, 635 00:48:28,251 --> 00:48:31,709 what, with my obvious charm and good looks, 636 00:48:31,855 --> 00:48:34,790 but people used to think I was a monster. 637 00:48:34,925 --> 00:48:38,588 And for a long time, I believed them. 638 00:48:40,597 --> 00:48:42,189 But after a while, 639 00:48:42,332 --> 00:48:45,859 you learn to ignore the names people call you 640 00:48:46,003 --> 00:48:48,335 and you just trust who you are. 641 00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:53,603 You know... you're okay, Shrek. 642 00:48:54,444 --> 00:48:58,005 You just need to do a little less yelling and use a little more soap. 643 00:48:59,349 --> 00:49:00,976 Thanks, Artie. 644 00:49:01,118 --> 00:49:04,781 The soap's because you stink... really bad. 645 00:49:05,956 --> 00:49:08,447 Yeah... I got that. 646 00:49:12,462 --> 00:49:15,329 This place is filthy! 647 00:49:15,632 --> 00:49:17,224 I feel like a hobo. 648 00:49:18,468 --> 00:49:21,232 I'm sorry, but this isn't just working for me. 649 00:49:21,371 --> 00:49:25,933 Everything's always about you, isn't it. Something in your attitude is not helping. 650 00:49:26,076 --> 00:49:29,773 Maybe it just bothers you I was voted fairest in the land. 651 00:49:29,913 --> 00:49:32,006 Oh you mean in that rigged election? 652 00:49:32,149 --> 00:49:35,118 Oh give me a break. "Rapunzel, Rapunzel... 653 00:49:35,252 --> 00:49:38,380 ...let down thy golden extensions!" 654 00:49:38,522 --> 00:49:43,323 Ladies, let go of your pety complaints and let's work together! 655 00:49:46,296 --> 00:49:49,288 So I guess the plan is we just wander aimlessly 656 00:49:49,433 --> 00:49:51,526 in this stinkhole until we rot. 657 00:49:51,668 --> 00:49:55,195 No, we get inside and find out what Charming's up to. 658 00:49:55,338 --> 00:49:58,034 I know he's a jerk and everything, 659 00:49:58,175 --> 00:50:02,339 but that Charming makes me hotter than July. 660 00:50:03,680 --> 00:50:05,011 That's it! 661 00:50:33,043 --> 00:50:35,409 Come on! This way! 662 00:50:35,545 --> 00:50:36,534 Rapunzel, wait! 663 00:50:46,056 --> 00:50:47,887 Charming, let go of her. 664 00:50:48,024 --> 00:50:50,652 But why would I want to do that? 665 00:50:56,199 --> 00:50:57,188 What? 666 00:50:57,334 --> 00:51:02,431 Say hello, ladies, to the new Queen of Far Far Away. 667 00:51:06,443 --> 00:51:08,240 Rapunzel, how could you? 668 00:51:08,378 --> 00:51:10,642 Jealous much? 669 00:51:10,780 --> 00:51:13,214 Soon you'll be back where you started, 670 00:51:13,350 --> 00:51:15,978 scrubbing floors or locked away in towers. 671 00:51:16,119 --> 00:51:19,748 That is, if I let you last the week. 672 00:51:22,058 --> 00:51:24,652 But Pookie, you promised not to hurt them. 673 00:51:24,794 --> 00:51:28,787 Not here, kitten whiskers. Daddy will discuss it later. 674 00:51:29,533 --> 00:51:32,058 Now forgive us. We have a show to put on. 675 00:51:32,202 --> 00:51:35,467 Shrek will be back soon, Charming and you'll be sorry. 676 00:51:35,605 --> 00:51:37,004 Sorry?! 677 00:51:37,140 --> 00:51:41,406 Don't you realize once Shrek sets foot in Far Far Away... 678 00:51:41,545 --> 00:51:43,308 ...he's doomed? 679 00:52:22,852 --> 00:52:24,479 Look out! They got a piano! 680 00:52:24,621 --> 00:52:27,988 Kill them all... except the fat one. 681 00:52:28,124 --> 00:52:32,493 King Charming has something special in mind for you, ogre. 682 00:52:32,629 --> 00:52:33,926 King Charming? 683 00:52:34,064 --> 00:52:35,088 Attack! 684 00:52:41,371 --> 00:52:42,531 Artie, duck! 685 00:52:57,087 --> 00:52:58,349 Ready the plank! 686 00:53:14,070 --> 00:53:15,731 - Shrek! - Help! 687 00:53:35,058 --> 00:53:36,355 Cowards! 688 00:53:36,493 --> 00:53:38,859 What has Charming done with Fiona? 689 00:53:38,995 --> 00:53:41,589 She's gonna get what's coming to her. 690 00:53:42,165 --> 00:53:47,068 And there ain't nothing you can do to stop him! 691 00:53:47,203 --> 00:53:49,728 - We've got to save her. - But she's so far far away! 692 00:53:50,674 --> 00:53:52,972 Get yourself back to Worcestershire, kid. 693 00:53:53,109 --> 00:53:56,601 No, Shrek. Hold on a second. I've got an idea. 694 00:53:56,746 --> 00:53:59,010 I am a buzzing bee. 695 00:53:59,683 --> 00:54:02,880 Mr. Merlin? They need a spell to get them... 696 00:54:03,019 --> 00:54:06,045 ...I mean us, back to Far Far Away. 697 00:54:06,189 --> 00:54:09,625 Forget it. I don't have that kind of magic in me anymore, kid. 698 00:54:09,759 --> 00:54:13,456 How about a hug? That's the best kind of magic. 699 00:54:13,596 --> 00:54:15,962 Mr merlin, please. I know you can do it. 700 00:54:16,099 --> 00:54:17,896 I said forget it! 701 00:54:18,034 --> 00:54:19,365 But... 702 00:54:26,776 --> 00:54:28,368 What's with you? 703 00:54:29,713 --> 00:54:32,876 It's just so hard, you know? 704 00:54:33,550 --> 00:54:37,680 They really need to get back, 'cause their kingdom's in trouble. 705 00:54:37,821 --> 00:54:40,346 'Cause there's a really bad man. 706 00:54:40,490 --> 00:54:42,253 And it's just so hard! 707 00:54:42,392 --> 00:54:44,519 Take it easy. 708 00:54:44,661 --> 00:54:48,028 No! I don't think you understand! 709 00:54:48,164 --> 00:54:52,692 There's a mean person doing mean things to good people. 710 00:54:52,836 --> 00:54:54,531 Have a heart, old man. 711 00:54:54,671 --> 00:54:58,835 They really need your help to get them back. So why won't you help them?! 712 00:55:02,679 --> 00:55:04,271 Okay. 713 00:55:04,414 --> 00:55:06,405 I'll go get my things. 714 00:55:09,185 --> 00:55:10,379 Piece of cake. 715 00:55:10,520 --> 00:55:14,047 Well, well. You want eggs with that ham? 716 00:55:14,190 --> 00:55:17,887 I am a little rusty, so there could be some side effects. 717 00:55:18,027 --> 00:55:19,494 - Side effects? - Don't worry. 718 00:55:19,629 --> 00:55:23,395 Whatever it is, no matter how excruciatingly painful it may be, 719 00:55:23,533 --> 00:55:26,696 it will wear off eventually. I think. 720 00:55:28,671 --> 00:55:30,901 - Oops. - Are you sure this is a good idea? 721 00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:35,170 Look, if Artie trusts him, that's good enough for me. 722 00:55:35,311 --> 00:55:37,176 Even if his robe doesn't quite cover... 723 00:55:37,313 --> 00:55:39,838 Alacritious... Expeditious... 724 00:55:39,983 --> 00:55:42,679 ...a-zoomy-zoom-zoom! 725 00:55:42,819 --> 00:55:45,652 Let's help our friends get back... 726 00:55:48,391 --> 00:55:49,722 ...soon! 727 00:55:57,066 --> 00:55:58,658 It worked! 728 00:56:07,377 --> 00:56:10,403 I haven't been on a trip like that since college! 729 00:56:10,847 --> 00:56:12,109 Donkey? 730 00:56:12,248 --> 00:56:15,081 What? Is something in my teeth? 731 00:56:17,520 --> 00:56:22,514 Oh, no! I've been abracadabra-ed into a Fancy Feastin', second-rate sidekick! 732 00:56:24,861 --> 00:56:28,922 At least you don't look like some kind of bloated roasted piņata! 733 00:56:29,065 --> 00:56:31,124 You should think about going on a diet! 734 00:56:31,267 --> 00:56:35,863 You should get yourself a pair of pants. I feel all exposed and nasty! 735 00:56:37,540 --> 00:56:39,872 So you two think this is funny? 736 00:56:42,378 --> 00:56:44,175 I'm really sorry, guys. 737 00:56:44,314 --> 00:56:46,782 Don't be. You got us back, kid. 738 00:56:52,455 --> 00:56:54,582 How in the Hans Christian Andersen 739 00:56:54,724 --> 00:56:57,488 am I supposed to parade around in these goofy boots? 740 00:56:57,627 --> 00:57:00,460 Hey, hey, hey! Be very careful with those. 741 00:57:01,898 --> 00:57:05,231 They were made in Madrid by the finest... 742 00:57:05,902 --> 00:57:07,893 You'll learn to control that. 743 00:57:10,807 --> 00:57:15,801 Seriously. Ow! You need some comfort inserts or arch supports or something. 744 00:57:21,985 --> 00:57:26,854 Watch it. I'm walking here and I'm gonna keep going until... 745 00:57:26,990 --> 00:57:28,082 Pinocchio! 746 00:57:28,825 --> 00:57:30,850 Shrek! Help me! 747 00:57:30,994 --> 00:57:34,191 - What happened? - Charming and the villains have taken over everything! 748 00:57:34,330 --> 00:57:38,096 Fiona and the Princesses got away. And now she's... 749 00:57:38,234 --> 00:57:39,758 She's what?! What?! 750 00:57:42,105 --> 00:57:43,936 Puss! Loan me five bucks. 751 00:57:44,073 --> 00:57:46,303 You heard him. Help the brother out. 752 00:57:46,442 --> 00:57:48,535 Do you see any pockets on me? 753 00:57:48,678 --> 00:57:50,509 Hold on a second. 754 00:57:53,016 --> 00:57:57,180 I had no idea, really. I... I swear. 755 00:57:58,354 --> 00:58:00,549 Quick Pinocchio! Where is Fiona? 756 00:58:00,690 --> 00:58:04,456 Charming has her locked away someplace. You have to find him! 757 00:58:04,594 --> 00:58:07,461 He's probably getting ready for the show! 758 00:58:07,597 --> 00:58:09,929 Wait, Pinocchio! What show? 759 00:58:14,938 --> 00:58:17,338 "It's a Happily Ever After After All". 760 00:58:17,473 --> 00:58:19,805 "Shrek's final performance"? 761 00:58:19,943 --> 00:58:24,073 Wow, Shrek! You didn't tell us you were in a play! 762 00:58:24,213 --> 00:58:27,671 Well I guess I've been so busy I forgot to mention it. 763 00:58:27,817 --> 00:58:29,375 It's the ogre! Get him! 764 00:58:30,720 --> 00:58:33,052 Don't worry, jefe. I got this. 765 00:58:39,596 --> 00:58:41,223 Uck! Kill it! 766 00:58:42,231 --> 00:58:47,362 Look. Don't you know who he thinks he is? How dare you! 767 00:58:47,503 --> 00:58:49,027 Donkey, we're dealing with amateurs. 768 00:58:49,172 --> 00:58:54,109 He's a star, people! Hello? I'm so sorry about this, Mr. Shrek. 769 00:58:54,243 --> 00:58:55,767 I'm going to lose it! 770 00:58:55,912 --> 00:58:59,712 I assume everything is ready for tonight? You did get the list for the dressing room? 771 00:58:59,849 --> 00:59:02,943 yeah, the breakfast croissant stuffed with seared sashimi tuna. 772 00:59:03,086 --> 00:59:06,385 And I hope you have the saffron corn with jalapeno honey buter. 773 00:59:06,522 --> 00:59:09,514 Our client cannot get into his proper emotional state 774 00:59:09,659 --> 00:59:11,456 without jalapeno honey buter! 775 00:59:11,594 --> 00:59:12,993 I just lost it. 776 00:59:13,763 --> 00:59:16,288 maybe they should talk to Nancy in Human Resources. 777 00:59:16,432 --> 00:59:19,924 Oh, we will have much to say to Nancy, I promise! 778 00:59:21,604 --> 00:59:25,301 "With this sword, I do..." No. "With..." 779 00:59:25,441 --> 00:59:29,104 "With this sword, I do smote thee!" 780 00:59:30,013 --> 00:59:32,481 Is "smote" the right word? "Smoot"? 781 00:59:32,615 --> 00:59:34,480 I don't think that's a word, actually. 782 00:59:34,617 --> 00:59:38,951 Maybe I should just "smite" him. Let's try this again. Now... 783 00:59:40,123 --> 00:59:43,286 Shrek attacks me. I pretend to be afraid. 784 00:59:44,027 --> 00:59:48,430 "Now the kingdom will get the happily ever after they deserve. Die, ogre!" 785 00:59:48,564 --> 00:59:52,227 Blah, blah, blah. Oh, it just doesn't feel real enough yet! 786 00:59:54,137 --> 00:59:56,162 Who told you to stop dancing?! 787 00:59:56,305 --> 00:59:57,772 Wink and turn. 788 00:59:57,907 --> 01:00:01,138 What are you laying around for? Get up! Honestly! 789 01:00:09,819 --> 01:00:13,016 Our happily ever after is nearly complete, Mummy. 790 01:00:13,156 --> 01:00:15,351 And I assure you... 791 01:00:15,491 --> 01:00:20,485 ...the people of this kingdom will pay dearly for every second... 792 01:00:21,664 --> 01:00:23,325 ...we've had to wait. 793 01:00:24,934 --> 01:00:26,367 Break a leg. 794 01:00:26,502 --> 01:00:29,266 On second thought, let me break it for you. 795 01:00:29,405 --> 01:00:33,705 Thank goodness, you're here. I was afraid you wouldn't get back in time. 796 01:00:33,843 --> 01:00:35,470 Where's Fiona? 797 01:00:35,611 --> 01:00:39,843 Don't worry. She and the others are safe... for now. 798 01:00:49,025 --> 01:00:52,358 Let me guess. Arthur. 799 01:00:53,029 --> 01:00:55,054 It's Artie, actually. 800 01:00:55,198 --> 01:01:00,192 This boy is supposed to be the new King of Far Far Away? 801 01:01:02,105 --> 01:01:03,402 How pathetic. 802 01:01:03,539 --> 01:01:06,406 Now, stand still, so I won't make a mess. 803 01:01:06,542 --> 01:01:09,978 Charming, stop! I'm here now. You got what you wanted. 804 01:01:10,113 --> 01:01:11,774 This isn't about him. 805 01:01:12,548 --> 01:01:16,882 Then who's it about? I'm supposed to be king, right? 806 01:01:18,221 --> 01:01:22,590 You weren't really next in line for the throne, okay. 807 01:01:22,725 --> 01:01:24,124 I was. 808 01:01:24,260 --> 01:01:27,593 But you said the King asked for me personally. 809 01:01:27,730 --> 01:01:29,561 Not exactly. 810 01:01:29,699 --> 01:01:31,132 What that supposed to mean? 811 01:01:31,267 --> 01:01:33,758 I said whatever I had to say, all right? 812 01:01:33,903 --> 01:01:37,600 I wasn't right for the job, I just needed some fool to replace me. 813 01:01:37,740 --> 01:01:41,403 And you fit the bill. So... So just go! 814 01:01:44,480 --> 01:01:46,539 You were playing me the whole time. 815 01:01:46,682 --> 01:01:48,445 You catch on real fast, kid. 816 01:01:48,584 --> 01:01:51,678 Maybe you're not as big of a loser as I thought. 817 01:01:58,094 --> 01:02:00,460 You know, for a minute there... 818 01:02:00,596 --> 01:02:02,496 ...I actually thought... - What? 819 01:02:02,632 --> 01:02:06,124 That he cared about you? He's an ogre. 820 01:02:06,269 --> 01:02:08,100 What did you expect? 821 01:02:18,080 --> 01:02:22,107 You really do have a way with children, Shrek. 822 01:02:34,463 --> 01:02:38,263 ~ Leave me out with the waste ~ 823 01:02:38,401 --> 01:02:41,336 ~ This is not what I do ~ 824 01:02:41,470 --> 01:02:45,167 ~ It's the wrong time ~ 825 01:02:45,308 --> 01:02:48,004 ~ She's pulling me through ~ 826 01:02:48,144 --> 01:02:51,841 ~ It's a small crime ~ 827 01:02:51,981 --> 01:02:54,609 ~ And I got no excuse ~ 828 01:02:54,750 --> 01:02:57,150 ~ And is that all right, yeah? ~ 829 01:02:58,621 --> 01:03:00,646 ~ Is that all right with you? ~ 830 01:03:01,490 --> 01:03:05,824 ~ Is that all right, yeah? ~ 831 01:03:06,329 --> 01:03:10,322 ~ If I give my gun away when it's loaded? ~ 832 01:03:12,501 --> 01:03:17,165 ~ If you don't shoot it how am I supposed to hold it? ~ 833 01:03:20,343 --> 01:03:23,210 ~ Is that all right? Is that all right? ~ 834 01:03:23,346 --> 01:03:26,782 ~ Is that all right with you? ~ 835 01:03:26,916 --> 01:03:27,383 ~ No. ~ 836 01:03:27,383 --> 01:03:27,781 ~ No. ~ 837 01:03:28,117 --> 01:03:29,948 Had we stayed put like I suggested, 838 01:03:30,086 --> 01:03:32,884 we could be sipping tea out of little heart-shaped cups. 839 01:03:33,022 --> 01:03:34,546 Yeah, heart-shaped cups. 840 01:03:34,690 --> 01:03:37,318 And eating crumpets smothered with loganberries. 841 01:03:37,460 --> 01:03:39,052 Yeah, loganberries. 842 01:03:39,195 --> 01:03:41,060 - Shut up, Cindy. - Yeah, shut up. 843 01:03:41,197 --> 01:03:44,064 - No, you shut up. - Stay out of this. 844 01:03:44,200 --> 01:03:46,998 Who cares who's "running the kingdom" anyway? 845 01:03:47,136 --> 01:03:50,367 - I care. - And you should all care too. 846 01:03:54,343 --> 01:03:57,244 I have your badge number, tin can! 847 01:03:57,380 --> 01:03:59,245 - Donkey? - Princess! 848 01:03:59,382 --> 01:04:00,371 Puss? 849 01:04:00,516 --> 01:04:04,577 I am Puss, stuck here inside this hideous body. 850 01:04:04,720 --> 01:04:05,744 And I'm me! 851 01:04:05,888 --> 01:04:07,014 But you're... 852 01:04:07,156 --> 01:04:09,818 I know, I know, everything's fruity in the loops, but what happened is 853 01:04:09,959 --> 01:04:11,927 we went to high school, and the boat crashed 854 01:04:12,061 --> 01:04:14,621 and we got bippity-boppity-booped by the magic man. 855 01:04:14,764 --> 01:04:16,959 You poor sweet things. 856 01:04:17,099 --> 01:04:18,498 I don't get it. 857 01:04:18,634 --> 01:04:22,365 The cat turned into a little horse that smells like feet. What's to get? 858 01:04:22,505 --> 01:04:23,870 Who dat? 859 01:04:24,006 --> 01:04:25,030 Where's Shrek? 860 01:04:25,174 --> 01:04:29,167 Charming has him. He plans to kill Shrek tonight in front of the whole kingdom! 861 01:04:30,579 --> 01:04:34,743 All right, everyone. We need to find a way out now. 862 01:04:34,884 --> 01:04:38,411 You're right. Ladies, assume the position! 863 01:04:43,292 --> 01:04:44,486 What are you doing? 864 01:04:45,261 --> 01:04:46,626 Waiting to be rescued. 865 01:04:46,762 --> 01:04:48,730 You've got to be kidding me. 866 01:04:48,864 --> 01:04:51,628 What do you expect us to do? We're just four... 867 01:04:51,767 --> 01:04:55,066 ...I mean three, super-hot princesses... 868 01:04:55,204 --> 01:04:59,265 ...two circus freaks, a pregnant ogre and an old lady! 869 01:05:00,109 --> 01:05:04,443 Excuse me. Old lady coming through. 870 01:05:13,055 --> 01:05:14,852 Mom! 871 01:05:14,991 --> 01:05:19,257 You didn't actually think you got your fighting skills from your father, did you? 872 01:05:19,395 --> 01:05:22,125 Excuse me. I think there's still one more. 873 01:05:32,308 --> 01:05:34,640 Why don't you just lie down? 874 01:05:37,313 --> 01:05:40,180 Okay, girls, from here on out... 875 01:05:40,316 --> 01:05:42,784 ...we're gonna take care of business ourselves. 876 01:05:59,835 --> 01:06:04,363 Ladies and gentlemen, The Far Far Away Theatre at the Charming Pavilion is proud to present... 877 01:06:04,507 --> 01:06:06,270 ..."It's A Happily Ever After After AII." 878 01:06:06,409 --> 01:06:09,708 Enjoy your evening of theatrical reverie, citizen. 879 01:06:09,845 --> 01:06:13,178 Oi! No food or beverages in the theater! 880 01:06:27,029 --> 01:06:28,394 Places, everyone! 881 01:06:33,536 --> 01:06:34,662 Easy! 882 01:06:34,804 --> 01:06:38,706 Sorry. I guess I was showing off for the little one. 883 01:06:39,442 --> 01:06:43,037 It's Bring Your Kids to Work Day. Come here, beautiful. 884 01:06:46,215 --> 01:06:49,207 Well, she's got your eye. 885 01:06:50,453 --> 01:06:55,390 Who would have thought a monster like me deserved something as special as you? 886 01:07:37,066 --> 01:07:40,092 ~ Little birdies, take wing ~ 887 01:07:40,936 --> 01:07:43,564 ~ Flitting down from the trees they appear ~ 888 01:07:43,706 --> 01:07:46,174 ~ And to chirp in my ear ~ 889 01:07:47,443 --> 01:07:50,435 ~ All because I sing ~ 890 01:08:20,075 --> 01:08:21,133 Move it! Go! 891 01:08:27,750 --> 01:08:29,479 My babies! 892 01:08:30,486 --> 01:08:31,475 Help! 893 01:09:17,032 --> 01:09:19,023 Hey, how's it goin'? 894 01:09:29,712 --> 01:09:31,646 O to the K. The coast is clear. 895 01:09:31,780 --> 01:09:34,408 All right people, let's do this thing. Go, Team Dynamite! 896 01:09:34,550 --> 01:09:38,384 I thought we agreed go by the name Team Super Cool. 897 01:09:38,520 --> 01:09:40,750 I recall it was Team Awesome. 898 01:09:40,889 --> 01:09:42,823 I voted for Team Alpha Wolf Squadron. 899 01:09:42,958 --> 01:09:44,926 All right, all right, all right! From henceforth, 900 01:09:45,060 --> 01:09:49,190 We will be known as Team Alpha Super Awesome Cool Dynamite Wolf Squadron. 901 01:09:49,331 --> 01:09:53,563 Ach de liebe! There is some strange little girl over there staring at us! 902 01:09:54,503 --> 01:09:55,868 Artie! 903 01:09:56,005 --> 01:09:57,370 Wait, wait! 904 01:09:57,506 --> 01:09:59,701 Where is the fire, seņor? 905 01:09:59,842 --> 01:10:01,867 Please. Don't act so innocent. 906 01:10:02,011 --> 01:10:05,777 You both knew what was going on and kept it to yourselves. 907 01:10:05,914 --> 01:10:07,506 Artie, it's not like it seems. 908 01:10:07,650 --> 01:10:10,483 It's not? I think it seems pretty clear. 909 01:10:10,619 --> 01:10:13,144 He was using me. That's all. 910 01:10:13,289 --> 01:10:15,723 Using you? You really don't get it. 911 01:10:15,858 --> 01:10:18,850 Shrek only said those things to protect you. 912 01:10:19,528 --> 01:10:24,192 Charming was going to kill you, Artie! Shrek saved your life. 913 01:10:34,777 --> 01:10:36,369 Cue the spot! 914 01:10:40,215 --> 01:10:42,740 ~ I wait alone up here ~ 915 01:10:42,885 --> 01:10:45,581 ~ I'm trapped another day ~ 916 01:10:45,721 --> 01:10:48,918 ~ Locked up here, please set me free ~ 917 01:10:49,058 --> 01:10:52,084 ~ My new life I almost see ~ 918 01:10:52,227 --> 01:10:54,923 ~ A castle, you and me ~ 919 01:10:55,064 --> 01:11:00,161 ~ Yes, a castle, you and me ~ 920 01:11:02,237 --> 01:11:03,295 Cherubs! 921 01:11:07,242 --> 01:11:11,042 ~ Tis I, Tis I Upon my regal steed ~ 922 01:11:11,180 --> 01:11:12,807 ~ Princess, my love ~ 923 01:11:12,948 --> 01:11:15,712 ~ At last you shall be freed I'm strong ~ 924 01:11:15,851 --> 01:11:17,819 ~ And brave And dashing my way there ~ 925 01:11:18,253 --> 01:11:23,919 ~ With speed! With might! With soft and bouncy hair! ~ 926 01:11:24,893 --> 01:11:28,659 ~ - Through the blistering desert - Hot! ~ 927 01:11:28,797 --> 01:11:31,823 ~ - Across the stormiest sea - Wet! ~ 928 01:11:31,967 --> 01:11:33,958 ~ Facing creatures so vile ~ 929 01:11:34,103 --> 01:11:35,229 ~ Foul! ~ 930 01:11:35,371 --> 01:11:39,501 ~ So you can gaze upon me! ~ 931 01:11:40,809 --> 01:11:43,141 ~ I knew you'd come for me ~ 932 01:11:43,278 --> 01:11:47,112 ~ And now we finally meet ~ 933 01:11:47,249 --> 01:11:48,716 ~ I knew you'd wait ~ 934 01:11:48,851 --> 01:11:53,379 ~ And from my plate of love you'd eat ~ 935 01:12:13,308 --> 01:12:16,641 ~ Who is this terribly ugly fiend Who so rudely intervened? ~ 936 01:12:16,779 --> 01:12:18,610 ~ Will Charming fight or flee? ~ 937 01:12:18,747 --> 01:12:19,805 ~ Oh please rescue me! ~ 938 01:12:19,948 --> 01:12:21,643 ~ From this monstrosity! ~ 939 01:12:21,784 --> 01:12:26,812 ~ Fear thee not, honey lamb! I will slice this thing up like a ham! ~ 940 01:12:27,990 --> 01:12:29,457 Oh, boy. 941 01:12:29,591 --> 01:12:33,186 ~ You are about to enter a world of pain ~ 942 01:12:33,328 --> 01:12:37,662 ~ With which you are not familiar! ~ 943 01:12:41,103 --> 01:12:45,506 Well, it can't be any more painful than your lousy performance you're giving. 944 01:12:49,178 --> 01:12:51,169 "Prepare, foul beast." 945 01:12:53,282 --> 01:12:56,547 ~ Prepare, foul beast, your time is done! ~ 946 01:12:56,685 --> 01:12:59,848 Could you kill me and then sing? 947 01:13:01,356 --> 01:13:03,051 Be quiet! 948 01:13:03,192 --> 01:13:07,322 Come on, I'm just having fun with you. That's actually a very nice leotard. 949 01:13:07,463 --> 01:13:08,725 Thank you. 950 01:13:08,864 --> 01:13:10,957 Do they come in men's sizes? 951 01:13:14,036 --> 01:13:15,765 Now that be funny! 952 01:13:15,904 --> 01:13:17,872 Enough! 953 01:13:20,275 --> 01:13:24,075 Now you'll finally know what it's like... 954 01:13:24,213 --> 01:13:27,740 ...to have everything you worked for... 955 01:13:27,883 --> 01:13:31,910 ...everything that's precious to you, taken away. 956 01:13:32,054 --> 01:13:35,387 Now you'll know how I felt. 957 01:13:42,731 --> 01:13:44,392 Sausage roll! 958 01:14:01,750 --> 01:14:04,275 Pray for mercy from Puss! 959 01:14:04,419 --> 01:14:05,909 And Donkey! 960 01:14:06,121 --> 01:14:07,179 D 961 01:14:18,200 --> 01:14:19,462 Hi, honey. 962 01:14:19,601 --> 01:14:22,627 Sorry we're late. You okay? 963 01:14:22,771 --> 01:14:25,103 Much better, now that you're here. 964 01:14:27,776 --> 01:14:32,975 So, Charming, you want to let me out of these so we can settle this ogre-to-man? 965 01:14:33,115 --> 01:14:37,449 Ooh, that sounds fun. But I have a better idea. 966 01:14:53,302 --> 01:14:55,702 - Fiona ! - No! Let go of me! 967 01:14:55,837 --> 01:14:59,967 You will not ruin things this time, ogre. Kill it. 968 01:15:03,812 --> 01:15:05,575 Everybody, stop! 969 01:15:07,416 --> 01:15:09,509 Oh, what is it now?! 970 01:15:09,651 --> 01:15:10,913 Artie? 971 01:15:20,596 --> 01:15:23,064 Who really thinks we need to settle things this way? 972 01:15:27,336 --> 01:15:31,033 You're telling me you want to be villains your whole lives? 973 01:15:31,173 --> 01:15:34,973 But we are villains! It's the only thing we know. 974 01:15:35,110 --> 01:15:37,544 Did you never wish you could be something else? 975 01:15:37,679 --> 01:15:41,137 It's easy for you to say. You're not some evil enchanted tree. 976 01:15:41,283 --> 01:15:44,047 You morons! Don't listen to him! Attack! 977 01:15:44,186 --> 01:15:46,984 What Steve's trying too say is it's hard to come by honest work 978 01:15:47,122 --> 01:15:49,147 when the whole world's against you. 979 01:15:49,291 --> 01:15:51,020 Right. Thanks, Ed. 980 01:15:51,159 --> 01:15:55,562 Okay, fair enough. You're right. I'm not a talking tree. 981 01:15:55,697 --> 01:15:56,789 But you know... 982 01:15:56,932 --> 01:16:00,060 ...a good friend of mine once told me... 983 01:16:00,202 --> 01:16:05,230 ...that just because people treat you like a villain, or an ogre... 984 01:16:05,374 --> 01:16:07,365 ...or just some loser... 985 01:16:08,877 --> 01:16:10,777 ...doesn't mean you are one. 986 01:16:13,649 --> 01:16:17,517 The thing that matters most is what you think of yourself. 987 01:16:17,653 --> 01:16:21,953 If there's something you really want, or someone you really want to be... 988 01:16:22,090 --> 01:16:25,719 ...then the only person standing in your way is you. 989 01:16:26,228 --> 01:16:27,991 - Me? - Get him! 990 01:16:28,130 --> 01:16:29,529 No, no, no! 991 01:16:29,665 --> 01:16:32,600 What I mean is each of you... 992 01:16:32,734 --> 01:16:34,998 ...is standing in your own way. 993 01:16:38,907 --> 01:16:41,398 I always wanted to play the flute. 994 01:16:41,543 --> 01:16:45,206 I'd like to open up a spa... in France! 995 01:16:45,347 --> 01:16:49,909 I grow daffodils. And they're beautiful. 996 01:17:38,633 --> 01:17:41,796 A new era finally begins! 997 01:17:43,638 --> 01:17:45,299 Now all of you... 998 01:17:46,141 --> 01:17:48,541 ...bow before your King! 999 01:17:54,983 --> 01:17:57,315 You need to work on your aim. 1000 01:17:59,654 --> 01:18:02,521 This was supposed to be my happily ever after! 1001 01:18:02,657 --> 01:18:05,148 Now I guess you need to keep looking... 1002 01:18:07,162 --> 01:18:09,221 ...because I'm not giving up mine. 1003 01:18:14,503 --> 01:18:15,663 Mommy? 1004 01:18:27,015 --> 01:18:29,176 It's yours if you want it you know. 1005 01:18:29,851 --> 01:18:32,183 But this time it's your choice. 1006 01:18:54,876 --> 01:18:55,900 Author! 1007 01:18:56,044 --> 01:18:59,377 Artie! Artie! Artie! Artie! 1008 01:19:03,718 --> 01:19:06,710 Excuse me. That's my seat. 1009 01:19:07,722 --> 01:19:12,489 Okay, Seņor Hocusy-Pocusy, the time has come to rectify some wrongs! 1010 01:19:12,627 --> 01:19:15,152 Although I have been enjoying these cat baths. 1011 01:19:15,297 --> 01:19:16,787 Please say you didn't. 1012 01:19:16,932 --> 01:19:18,832 All right, all right! Look. 1013 01:19:18,967 --> 01:19:22,266 You're gonna feel a little pinch and possibly lower intestinal discomfort... 1014 01:19:22,404 --> 01:19:24,736 ...but this should do the trick. 1015 01:19:28,977 --> 01:19:31,445 - Are you? - I'm me again! 1016 01:19:31,580 --> 01:19:33,844 - And I am not you! - All right! 1017 01:19:35,417 --> 01:19:36,577 Oops. 1018 01:19:38,587 --> 01:19:39,986 Ah, never mind. 1019 01:19:43,992 --> 01:19:48,053 What did I tell you? I think the kid's going to be a great king. 1020 01:19:48,196 --> 01:19:51,757 Well, for what it's worth, you would have, too. 1021 01:19:53,268 --> 01:19:56,260 I have something much more important in mind. 1022 01:20:21,796 --> 01:20:23,024 Finally. 1023 01:20:29,804 --> 01:20:31,135 Dada. 1024 01:20:33,241 --> 01:20:37,610 ~ Was I wrong about the world? It's a beautiful new place ~ 1025 01:20:37,746 --> 01:20:40,237 I smell Shrek Junior! 1026 01:20:40,382 --> 01:20:43,044 ~ Where else could a creep like me ~ 1027 01:20:43,184 --> 01:20:45,914 ~ Meet such a pretty face ~ 1028 01:20:46,054 --> 01:20:49,990 ~ Meeting every day with the rising sun ~ 1029 01:20:52,794 --> 01:20:55,695 ~ Looking up, it's looking like ~ 1030 01:20:55,830 --> 01:20:58,492 ~ My losing streak is done ~ 1031 01:20:59,401 --> 01:21:00,698 Peek-a-boo! 1032 01:21:00,835 --> 01:21:02,166 Peek-a-boo! 1033 01:21:05,373 --> 01:21:07,204 A bouncy, bouncy, boy! 1034 01:21:07,342 --> 01:21:10,038 ~ Used to always feel like ~ 1035 01:21:10,178 --> 01:21:12,840 ~ Wished that I was dressed better ~ 1036 01:21:13,848 --> 01:21:15,509 Where's the baby? 1037 01:21:15,650 --> 01:21:20,019 ~ Never had a lot of luck Until I finally met her ~ 1038 01:21:29,531 --> 01:21:33,524 ~ Meeting every day with the rising sun ~ 1039 01:21:36,204 --> 01:21:38,365 ~ Looking up, it's looking like ~ 1040 01:21:39,040 --> 01:21:41,873 ~ My losing streak is done ~ 1041 01:21:44,045 --> 01:21:46,377 ~ My losing streak is done ~ 1042 01:21:57,225 --> 01:21:59,887 Well... what shall we do now? 1043 01:22:15,910 --> 01:22:17,571 I got it. 1044 01:22:24,085 --> 01:22:28,454 Puss and Donkey, baby! Once again, come on! 1045 01:22:28,590 --> 01:22:33,220 ~ I want to thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1046 01:22:33,361 --> 01:22:34,453 ~ Again! ~ 1047 01:22:34,596 --> 01:22:36,461 ~ Look at my hips! ~ 1048 01:22:36,598 --> 01:22:41,797 ~ I want to thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1049 01:22:41,936 --> 01:22:43,426 ~ Again! ~ 1050 01:22:48,710 --> 01:22:50,234 ~ - Break it down! - Let's go! ~ 1051 01:22:50,378 --> 01:22:52,778 ~ Stiff all in the collar ~ 1052 01:22:54,616 --> 01:22:56,777 ~ Fluffy in the face ~ 1053 01:22:58,953 --> 01:23:01,444 ~ Chit chat chatter trying ~ 1054 01:23:02,791 --> 01:23:04,952 ~ Stuffy in the place ~ 1055 01:23:07,128 --> 01:23:09,961 ~ Thank you for the par-tay ~ 1056 01:23:11,132 --> 01:23:12,997 ~ But I could never stay ~ 1057 01:23:13,134 --> 01:23:14,465 ~ I'm sorry. ~ 1058 01:23:15,136 --> 01:23:18,128 ~ I got many things on my mind ~ 1059 01:23:19,474 --> 01:23:21,635 ~ But the word's in the way ~ 1060 01:23:22,644 --> 01:23:27,843 ~ And I want to thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1061 01:23:27,982 --> 01:23:29,313 ~ Again ~ 1062 01:23:30,318 --> 01:23:32,286 ~ Different strokes for different folks ~ 1063 01:23:32,420 --> 01:23:36,015 ~ Thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1064 01:23:36,157 --> 01:23:37,647 ~ Again ~ 1065 01:23:39,828 --> 01:23:41,318 ~ Break it down! ~ 1066 01:23:42,330 --> 01:23:45,493 ~ Puss and Donkey, baby! Puss and Donkey, baby! ~ 1067 01:23:46,000 --> 01:23:47,661 ~ Puss and Donkey, baby! ~ 1068 01:23:49,003 --> 01:23:51,164 ~ Dance to the music ~ 1069 01:23:53,007 --> 01:23:55,339 ~ All night long ~ 1070 01:23:57,345 --> 01:23:59,677 ~ Everyday people ~ 1071 01:24:01,349 --> 01:24:03,510 ~ Sing a simple song ~ 1072 01:24:05,520 --> 01:24:08,011 ~ Mama's so happy ~ 1073 01:24:09,858 --> 01:24:11,849 ~ Mama start to cry ~ 1074 01:24:14,028 --> 01:24:16,519 ~ Papa's still singing ~ 1075 01:24:17,699 --> 01:24:21,191 ~ You can make it if you try So try! ~ 1076 01:24:22,370 --> 01:24:26,238 ~ Thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1077 01:24:26,374 --> 01:24:27,705 ~ Again ~ 1078 01:24:30,712 --> 01:24:34,580 ~ Thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1079 01:24:34,716 --> 01:24:36,411 ~ Again ~ 1080 01:24:36,551 --> 01:24:39,418 ~ Come on, Donkey. Do something right! ~ 1081 01:24:39,554 --> 01:24:41,954 ~ Put the hoofs together! Put the hoofs together! ~ 1082 01:24:43,057 --> 01:24:47,255 ~ Stomp your boots, baby! Stomp your boots, baby! Stomp your boots, baby! ~ 1083 01:24:47,395 --> 01:24:51,263 ~ Thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1084 01:24:51,399 --> 01:24:52,889 ~ Again ~ 1085 01:24:55,069 --> 01:24:59,597 ~ I want to thank you for letting me be myself ~ 1086 01:24:59,741 --> 01:25:00,833 ~ Again ~ 1087 01:25:00,975 --> 01:25:03,944 ~ Thank you, thank you, thank you. ~ 1088 01:25:04,078 --> 01:25:07,275 ~ Want to thank you Just to be my ~ 1089 01:25:07,415 --> 01:25:10,282 ~ Because I just want to be my... See? ~ 1090 01:25:10,418 --> 01:25:13,114 ~ Can I, can I thank you! Can I ~ 1091 01:25:13,254 --> 01:25:15,085 ~ Yes! Yes! ~