Previously on The L Word
Why is it so important for you to belevieve that everyone is sleeping with every one else
Because they are
Do you know the neighbour next door
Are they... uh
a gay couple?
Yeah, they are
'Cause I saw them... of having sexe in their pool
we have a party tomorow night you and Tim should come
Jenny this is Marina
you guys should totally take the cosmo romance quiz
where are you?
I'm right here
you 're getting married?
are you happy?
don't ask me that
why could't you stop it? why was it so hard?
what happend betwenn us was a terrible mistake
did you hear what she said?
we need to get a divorce
you're free on saturday night?
i have a date
Has she told you she's a dyke?
I should probably be the one to go
Gene no, I should go
No, I don't want either of you to leave
you noticed that every time shane enters a room
someone leaves crying
I don't do relashionships
Tell me what you want
In terms of what you can do for me?
Are you in love with her?
yeah
You gotta learn to keep it in your pants
open the gate
- I never want to see you, again - ok listen to me
It was a delusion
You felt the same way about me
That kind of love does not exist
What does shane have that I don't have?
she's nipple comfident
hey!
You don't understand what it means to be me
So so glad to meet you I'm Tonya, your guest liaison I'm here to take care of all your needs
I can't belive I'm about to go down on Dana Fairbanks
that girl has bad fucking vibes
When are you gonna make up your mind between dick and pussy?
I'm looking for the same qualities in a man as I am in a woman
Big tits
We're getting married
You can't marry Tonya
Look, if you ever need anyone to talk to give me a call
She wants to be your husband
If you were a man
you'd be the perfect man
Wow
Let's make a baby
I have found the perfect donor
How could you not have told me that Markus Allenwood was black?
We're gonna have a baby
I was unable to locate a heart beat
I was only twleve weeks and I feel like I lost someone I was with my whole life
All I've wanted to do all day long was kiss you
- I can't - You can't what baby?
Take me somewhere
- I saw it - I'm sorry
Fuck you
I can't believe this is happening
When we did this, I thought I had a certain amount of security
Whether it worked or not
I thought Bette and I were solid
When are you planning to tell her?
Right about now
If everything looked like it was going to go well
and nothing was gonna go wrong like last time
I didn't think Bette could handle another miscarriage
No?
Oh my...
whaou
look at you
Yes just sort of, uh... just popped
I'm not ready to tell anybody
I want to keep it to myself for a while
well that's not gonna be easy my dear
Looks like I'm having this baby on my own
Now that's a shame, Tina
Don't say that People do it all the time
And you're ok with that?
I want this baby more than ever
I'm so happy to have you here
Hello?
Hey
Where did you go?
What's going on?
Dammit...
why did I get this assignment? I'm so not a knitter
Well, it's crazy popular and all the fags I know are doing it
Even some of the straight boys, too
Right! See? Men should be knitting, and women should be running the world That's how I see it
That's what I'm gonna write
for L A Magazine
It's good
Yeah, go for it, they'll love it
How's Tina?
Well, Bette still hasn't called her
There's something really wrong when God lets two people who are meant to be together come apart like that
You believe in God?
What?
This coffee tastes like poopie shit!
Where's Marina?
I haven't seen her for days, I have no idea
I don't know, I haven't either
So listen, do you, um...
you wanna talk about anything, or...
'cause that's what friends are for
If you'd like to talk
No, I got nothing to talk about
Shane
What?
Aw, quit bein' such a lez!
Well, what! You're just back from Cherie Jaffe-land?
Nothing's changed, I'm still me
Ohhh, so you still live by the code
You don't do relationships
It's not a code, it's me
Oh, shit!
Oh no, I cannot take Cruella DeVille this morning
Do some - uh, pretend I'm upset
Put your arm around me! Um... I'll just start sobbing, and... obviously it'll be a really intimate moment
I mean...
no halfway-sensitive person would ever dream of interrupting
Guys, you guys!
This place is falling apart!
Did you guys hear what happened to Marina?
What?
A nervous breakdown, complete and total, she had to be hospitalized
She tried to off herself?
She slit her wrists, at the Bel Air Hotel, in the penthouse suite
That's horrible!
She was wearing that fabulous Dolce & Gabana suit, the men's cut
We should see her
Too late Her mother put her on a plane, she's back in Milan
She's a contessa, you know
I know, she's a contessa, Marina's a contessa
Honey?
Honey!
Honey, honey, come here!
Hi...
I was just telling the girls how I almost became your future ex-wife last night
Oh! Kinda freaked out with the wedding planners
Excuse me, we need a green tea!
Iced!
Are you okay?
Hum... Yeah...
- Ummm, freaked out About... Marina - Oh yeah,
thank God for the bell boy
He came in right as she was about to jump
- Wait, wait, you said she slit her wrists - Yeah
Look at you! All sweaty! Isn't it cute how she perspires so much?
So how's Tina?
Has Bette called yet?
Apparently, she walked in on them in their very own bedroom
oh
Okay! Miss Inside Story
How did Tina find out?
Well, actually, Tonya, um
she guessed, because she saw them touching hands,
and then... she knew everything
How could she tell just by seeing them touch hands
Women can do that
Yeah, especially dykes
Well, I don't know what Bette was thinking I mean,
you don't step out on a woman like Tina for somebody who hammers planks for a living
Oh my... ! What're you saying, Tonya that it would've been okay if Candace had a better job?
Guys, it's not our business
But Bette loves Tina, there's no doubt about it!
So then, they could just... why can't they work it out?
'Cause of the sex thing, and Bette can't help it
So if it's just a sex thing then you can get it under control, right?
Women can control it Men sometimes can't because they're controlled by their peckers
There is no difference between man and woman
and this is a perfect example or Bette would've called it off
Bette is still schtuping the carpenter?!
God, I feel so awful for Tina
Guys
Well, Bette better get that pecker under control!
Guys
You know those skinny, Japanese ones?
They don't really look like mushrooms, you know
they kinda look more like noodles, or something
I never know um...
uh, what to...
- ... do with them - Wha?
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry What were you saying?
- Uh, I was talking about mushrooms - Right Right, right, right
Do you like mushrooms?
Selectivly
You?
Uh... they... they really do scare me
Ah, I remember in third grade, there was this beautiful girl - God
Gorgeous Her name was, uh...
... Miriam, and she had this wild mushroom and just was in the hospital for like three weeks
and had this allergic reaction and...
God, she missed the relay race, and...
Wow
I've never actually seen onions on a stem before
Do they taste different?
Smell them
Oh That's very strong
Do you wanna fuck her right here, or, do you both wanna come back to my place?
Gene!
- 'Cause I don't think my roommate's home... - No, no I'm sorry
OK...
What's going on?
Look, I didn't press you into this
Alright You said you wanted to keep seeing me
So
- Yeah, I know, I know - What is it?
And I said that I like you
Well that's really nice, you know I like you, too
But we don't have sex
Okay? There it is I'd like to be having sex with the woman I cook for...
make mix-tapes for you, you don't wanna have sex!
And... I know why! It's because you're gay
Alright?
That's it
I'm sorry to break it to you, but you are a girl-loving, full-on lesbian!
I don't think that's for you to say
Well, deal with it
Alright?
Good luck
Are we ever gonna talk about this?
Talk about what?
Okay...
Hold on...
It was a mistake, right?
If you say so...
Well, what about you, you don't have anything to say?
You're the one who kissed me first
I do remember you kissing me back
After you started it
So if I was to kiss you again?
Oh
You know
Oh... You know...
Oh... Alice will know Alice, Al, what's the uh...
Booking agency Not Smash Box, but, you know
- Uh, Fred Segal Hair and Makeup? - Tonya, listen, it's cool Alright
The agency is fine They got me a job
Who's the client?
Hum...
Ariana, someone
Ariana Huffington?
Yeah
She um... she wrote a book
She's doing a book tour, and she's doing all these TV talk shows
David Letterman, Jay Leno, Bill O'Reilly? Come on!
Ariana Huffington is fifty
She's not really your type
She's kinda fancy
I'm doing her hair, Al, I'm not gonna fuck her
- Oh, okay 'Cause the old Shane would have - Huh...
Well in that case, if she's hot...
Honey
Shane is doing Ariana Huffington
You're doing Ariana Huffington? She's fifty, Shane!
Her hair...
Look, it's great, Shane It is
If things go well with Ariana Huffington, then... maybe you can get some film clients
You could go on location,
you could travel...
- Yeah, that'd be cool - Yeah That's great
I gotta go, you guys
Don't worry, I'm not going to ask to join you I know that you all probably think that I'm a monster
I just... I have something that I need to say to Tina
- You want us to go? - No
If you have something to say, say it here
Tina...
I didn't try to...
See you, or
Call you until now, because I wanted to make sure...
That I could do what you asked of me
I promise
I am not going to ever see her again,
I am not ever going to speak to her again
I am not ever going to think about her again
I miss you
More than that, I need you
And I don't think that I can...
I don't think that I can live without you
It is completly and totally over
When did you end it?
This morning, and I told her that you were the love of my life
and that I didn't know what I was doing and that I must've gone...
temporarily insane
Did you tell her in person?
Or on the phone?
Why does that matter?
Because I drove by the house at 2:00 AM
And your car wasn't there
Did you fuck all night before you told her I was the love of your life this morning?!
So rentals is the cash cow of the business, but my real love is picture cars
Picture cars
Yeah, for the movies
Oh Yeah...
A director will come in and tell me he wants to put Billy Bob
in the exact, souped-up, Hemi under-glass Bob Riggle drove in the stock car races
in Jersey when he was a kid, you know? He'll want the slicks
and the scoops, the Pink Panther flames, exactly like he remembers it in his head
Ivan you are speaking a foreign language to me
And you know what that does to a girl
Let's go inside, I got something I wanna show you Come on
By driving into the wall at a hotel parking garage?
Doesn't sound like a very serious suicide attempt to me
Well, that's the talk at The Planet
You know, I feel so bad, because...
I didn't know she was hurting that much
I know Let go, and let God
Oh... "Ivan Aycock: vintage restorer to the stars"
That's the bomb!
I had no idea
This is your office
Look, I invited you here because I...
... have a little present for you
- Oh, Ivan, I... can't - It's not what you think
Open it
Okay...
This is the key to my apartment
I live two blocks from The Planet
I just want you to feel free to stop by anytime you need a break from work
Oh... I mean, it's not a done deal yet
I still have to go to the bank tomorrow,
and have my meeting, and then...
I have a lot to work on with Marina's family
Her mom was some kinda damn contessa
She may be a contessa
But as far as I'm concerned...
Kit, you're a queen
Don't you forget it
What's this one for?
That looks like my car
Sort of
I did a little work on it
A little! Ah!
A little restoration to help you celebrate getting your license restored
No one's ever done anything like that for me
I don't know how to thank you
Not yet
Why?
Because you're not sure
And I want you...
...to be sure
Come on gorgeous, Let's go take it for a spin
Come on
Oh yes
Ah, it looks fabulous
Wow
So, Oberlin's supposed to be a really great school
Yeah, it's a great team
Coach Haspel!
You know, they want me there a week from Monday, so...
I figure I'd give myself five days to drive to Ohio
Right
Hey...
Are you still gonna get your teaching certificate?
Maybe
You find an apartment yet?
No...
It's so depressing Tim...
You should stay here
Take over the lease
Oh no...
Can't afford the rent on this house
What about your new job?
Um, waitresses at Hank 59 do not get paid that much
Think about it You know the rent's all paid through the end of the month
Are you serious?
You'd actually let me stay here?
Yeah, what? I'm gonna kick you out on principle?
Are you serious Tim?
That would be amazing
Thing is, I just... I need to focus right now
'cause I'm just, like... and
okay
Charlotte Birch is teaching this master class at C U
and I'm just trying to get in, you know
Whatever, I'm just having the worst time with my writing, I'm just...
I don't know, I'm just feeling kinda blocked
How every time one person has sex with another person,
Each of their previous sexual encounters is evoked
How that links us all into an infinite network of human connections
Each of their previous sexual encounters is evoked
How that links us into an infinite network of human connections
What Jane understood was that her parents were fighting again
Their human connection,
tenuous the night before
now wearing dangerously thin
Don't leave
Hey
Hey Bett
Hi Tim
I just, uh, wanna say goodbye
Oh, yeah, you going somewhere?
Ohio
Ohio Really For how long?
Uh I took a job there I'm leaving the day after tomorrow
So Good luck
Shit...
Wait Tim I'm...
I'm sorry
I didn't know you were moving away
Don't worry about it it's fine
You - wait - you're moving to Ohio for good?
I don't - I don't know if it's for good but...
But yeah...
Look, I uh...
I just...
I'm glad I got to know you
Well I'm glad I got to know you too, Tim
I'll miss you
Yeah
Who knows, maybe some other
poor sucker will move in here with his sexualy confused girlfriend,
and you can introduce one of your predatory friends
and she can seduce her, and
his whole life can fall apart
You know she tried to kill herself
She tried to...
drive her car off the PCH or something
Marina?
I mean I can't blame you if you
You know, not sorry for her
No, I mean...
I wouldn't wish that on anyone
You just, you never expect your life to throw you so totally off plan
You know what I mean?
Yeah... I think I do
Is Tina around? I really like to say goodbye to her
No
She's not here
Well
If I don't see her, could you tell her I said goodbye?
Yeah, sure
Hey...
- Hey... - Hey...
I'm Shane
Hi, Shane, I'm Ariana
Hey, Ariana
I like what you're wearing
Thank you
Who do you dress for?
Uh...
Um... myself
And the girlies sometimes, but
mostly me
So, you're gay?
Totally, yes
You know, I was at a dinner the other night...
... and someone said that dykes are the new fags
What do you think about that?
I think people like to categorize things too much
So what's your book about?
This country, politics...
Yeah
My ideas about how to make the world better
Good for you
What about you Shane?
What do you want?
Hum...
well, I haven't really thought about it Um
What about love?
No... love's a bitch
I'd rather just have a good time and move on
Alright, Miss Huffington,
here's your soy latte
Um Can I get you anything?
No... thank you
Just let me know if you change your mind
Uh... I'm Carmen
- Hey Carmen, I'm Shane - Hey
See you
- Hey, sorry... - Hi...
Don't worry, I'll be fine
But I should... be here for you
Go
So anyway...
This is my day job euh...
last week I PA at a Fischerspooner video
- Cool... - You know...
I DJ too... I do "Little Temple" on Fridays,
and then I do a night of old school,
body wave and electro
at "MRX" every other Wednesday
Very cool
So what about you?
What do you do when you're not doing hair?
What do I do...
Nothing much
- Hang out - Yeah
Whatever...
Oh yeah, yeah... Okay
Got it
Catch you later
Alright
Hey Shane...
Hum...
Do you wanna listen to something really cool?
So I heard this mix at "The Knitting Factory" last weekend
I mean this is...
this is exactly where I wanna be in like 5 years from now
I like a girl with ambition
Fuck you
Okay If you want
Wow Where does this lead?
Oh It was from my father
I never met him but...
... supposedly he was some kind of Mayan medicine man
How come you never met him?
He died in a motorcycle crash before I was born
Look, I don't want any talking in here alright?
What's going on? Could someone get me a 20 on Shane?
Bob, go to 2 for me
Yeah, well that's because I called final touches five minutes ago,
so where's hair?!
He'll do a large-scale painting for one of the lobby walls
based on Japanese anime
It's an illicit exterior...
Go on, I'm listening! I'm listening
An a illicit exterior installation, uh,
just below the Sawtelle-405 freeway overpass -
You know I saw Noble's performance piece where he crawled naked
across a table, ranting about his weakness and perfidy
Who do you think is gonna fund that?
Oh, I applied to the Ahmanson Foundation
Never gonna happen, they're way too conservative
No!
This is like the fifth time she's called
You tell her to fucking stop calling
Apply to the Peabody Foundation they might fund a Noble project
- Okay, so you do number three and I will take two and five, okay?
- Are you okay with that? - Yes
Hello
How are you?
May I um
Please take your order?
Uh, we have a few questions, are the burgers made with New Zealand or American beef?
I'm like to substitute feta cheese for the American cheese...
... and mixed greens for the fries
Um, will you please excuse me for a second?
I will be right back
- We'd like to order - Okay
Hi
What's going on?
Uh, I just wanted to make sure you're okay
I'm okay
I mean, I'm gonna be a shitty waitress, but... I'm okay, you know
You haven't heard, obviously...
haven't heard what?
Marina tried to commit suicide
Yeah...
She checked into the Bel Air Hotel
The Presidential Suite
You said she tried, she didn't...
...kill herself
No, apparently, uh... the people across the hall heard shouting,
they thought a woman was getting hurt so they called the front desk The bell boy, um...
found Marina alone in the room,
with like 3 bottle of pills, totally out of her skull
Oh, poor Marina
They called me
I don't know why I guess my number was in her purse
I managed to find her mother, I remembered Marina telling me me she lives in Umbria, so...
In a villa
Jen, I feel like maybe I shouldn't say this, but...
When I got to the hospital...
She was calling your name
Miss, we'd like to order
Pookie, you won't believe this!
- Whoa - Look at this!
That?
Isn't this beautiful?
The Jura Capresso S8 Espresso Coffee Maker?
One thousand, nine hundred ninety-nine dollars? Tonya!
We can't register for that!
Well Da... a few people might chip in together
Dana, do not second-guess the generosity of our friends
Now, look, I wanna show you something at Geary's
Hello
This is Dana Fairbanks
Hi! Yeah, hi! Um...
I - I think we should talk
Uh-huh...
- It's Robbie, my old - tennis partner - Oh...
before Harrison...
I'd love to see you Where, when?
Honey, look... I think we need to think about some cut crystal
Okay! Uh-huh
Alright...
How bout tomorrow morning at Runyon Canyon?
Th - uh... how bout I meet you at the gate at 10:30?
- It's a little early - Okay
Eleven, eleven is fine
Okay, but you know With traffic it's - it might - the 405 -
Um...
Four o'clock is good, four, uh... four in the afternoon
I'll see you at four in the afternoon
- Okay - Okay, bye
It's good Knit...
knit away
talking
Fun-filled
Dear...
I don't think you're gonna be able to get anybody's head through that thing
You know, though
I think this would make a really good harness for a strap on dildo
We could at least pretend to be human
Let me talk to Tina
What would you say?
That my sister is a pootie chasing dog
who deserves to be tied down and whupped upside the head
but it doesn't change the fact that she loves you more than she loves her own life
And that you should finish punishing her
and get back to figuring on how to live with one another for the next 50 years or more
You could give it a try
Now don't you go and pull a Marina on me now
Kit
I'm just saying
I read your business plan
It's solid
I'm be happy to co-sign on the loan
Well, what about the down payment?
Kit, I don't have fifty thousand dollars, not liquid, not that I can get my hands on
- Ivan't the only one that... who could possibly... - Ivan is not a good idea
Why is that?
Because it further confuses an already complicated situation,
you invite Ivan to be your business partner and then Ivan takes that as a broader invitation
That is so typical of you
You know, I have an impossible task to do,
And I come up with one possible solution and you diss my solution!
I'm not dissing you
Then what do you call it, then?
I'm pointing out a considerable flaw in what may or may not be a solution in the first place
Well... what makes you think that I don't wanna make that invitation?
Because Kit,
You're straight
Who says?
You're not?
I am, but I don't need you to tell me that and neither does Ivan
The way I see it,
Ivan is the one who gets to say whether or not he's a man or a woman
And he's been telling me he's more of a man
That's delusional thinking it doesn't work that way
Maybe in the world according to Bette...
the world according to Bette doesn't have the same props it once did, you know what I'm sayin’ baby sis?
You didn't do anything Jenny, she wasn't right
I knew it from the moment I met her, you know?
Scoot over
Are you sure you don't need to go to the hospital?
- Oh my God, I'm fine - Yeah?
Yeah, I'm fine
I fainted I do that sometimes, it's fine
Right
I hope someone's looking after her
Someone's looking after you
How's that?
My mom used to put these compresses on my forehead
Don't tell me I remind you of a dysfunctional mother
No, I don't know if she was dysfunctional, you know?
I mean, who could say if a mom's good or bad?
How's your apartment hunt coming?
So shitty
For practically, like, one thousand dollars, I could live in a hovel,
underneath the freeway...
You know, then Tim was like, “You can take over the lease” but there's no way that I could afford it, so...
I have a proposition for you
Why don't you move in with me?
You know, it's totally rent controlled, two bedrooms
I afford it easily,
you don't have to pay
I can't
I think we could be happy, Jen
So what's up?
Um, I wanted to ask if you could be outta the house for a couple hours tonight
'Cause Tina needs to come by and pick up some of her things, she's...
running out of clothes and stuff...
It's her house, she can come by anytime she wants
You know that's not true
You know...
What I did Alice... I couldn't help myself
How does that work?
Because...
It's kind of an act of free will
You know, I - I - exhausted every ounce of will that I had and I still couldn't stop myself
Did you fall in love?
No I love Tina Tina is the only person that I'm in love with
- But you're still sittin’ on Candace face - Actually, I'm not
I told you, I ended it as soon as I could
As soon as you could?
- What are you like a sex addict now? - No, I'm not a sex addict! Jesus
You know, I think calling sex an addiction is an excuse for bad behavior,
And I know I behaved badly, but I'm prepared to take responsibility for it
No, you behaved really badly
I know that it sounds like an excuse, but you know what?
The fact is she disappeared on me
She was depressed and she was completely wrapped up in herself,
And I tried to talk to her about it but she, she completely shut me out
For how long?
Two or three months
Out of seven years? I think you could have waited
She abandoned me as much as I abandoned her We both did it
Yeah, but, only one of you was having an orgasm
Fuck you, Alice
Just be outta the house!
Ivan, it's me
I'm a little early
In fact, I'm a lot early
Um, I wanted to talk to you about something that I'm very nervous about,
since you're so generous...
Ivan, I - I am so sorry! Look, I didn't see anything!
Kit...
Look, I'll wait for you in the other room!
Kit, I think you should go!
Look, Ivan, I will wait til you get dressed, okay?
I really need to talk to you because this - this thing that happened
Kit! Listen, okay?!
I... I want you to leave!
Do you understand?
Go!
Fuck!
Shit!
So...
You were saying?
Well... I was saying it's obvious there's something going on between us
What do you think it is?
I don't know
I mean, do you... do you have any ideas?
Maybe
I don't know
Maybe we're attracted to each other
Yeah, maybe
Yeah
Yeah, okay
Maybe if we admit that we're attracted to each other,
You know, sometimes...
Admitting a taboo takes the power out of it
I admit it, I'm attracted to you
How long have you been?
I don't know, I never realized it before
Okay, go on, it's your turn
I admit I'm attracted to you
What does it mean?
Well...
It doesn't have to mean anything, I mean...
Being attracted to someone's no big deal
- It's just an attraction - Right
We just... we have to agree not to act on it
Okay, how do we do that?
Well, we just took the first step, we took the power out of it
I think we need to take the second step
Yeah
Okay...
We need to counteract it
We just need to avoid all situations where we find each other most attractive
We need, like...
... rules of un-attraction
Okay, like never be alone together
in places like the bathroom at The Planet
Right
Never be alone together
Especially never be alone together...
in places where's there's like a bed or a couch
Right, or, or, a table...
Or a floor
- Or the backseat of a car - Ooh, that’d be good
That wouldn't be good!
Okay, you need to stop showing up at The Planet...
After you're worked out, when you're all sweaty and your veins are all popping all over the place
You like that?
Tonya hates that
- Alright, well then you can't wear those shirts any more - What shirts?
You know, the ones where...
they cling to you in some places and fall off you in others?
Fuck you
Okay, that's totally against the rules
Tim?
Thanks
I'de like to keep this one
I don't want the memory of us to evanesce
Let's not... evanesce
I needed to see you
You don't want to give me anything I need okay That's fair
Nothing's fair, Bette
You broke everything that meant anything to me
- Let me fixe it! - No
I won't accept that
Too bad...
Look, I... I overestimated myself
Alright Supporting us both financially, and then...
... and then when we lost the baby I thought that
I had to take on the whole burden, I thought that I had to absorb your pain and ignore my own
Well, I hope you had fun blowing off some steam with the carpenter
TINA!!
Hey...
How ya doin'?
Um, to tell you the truth, not - not too good
Yeah...
Look, I'm sorry
Don't be sorry Just tell me what's going on
I just wanted to have a good time tonight
I didn't think I'd see you
Okay, but...
Here I am
You don't think that you could've changed your plan a little bit?
I don't have a plan
That's the point
All right
Jen
Jen...
No
This seems wrong
I don't think this is the way we should...
It's not the way...
Is that good?
Yeah...
What are you doing?
I'm gonna go
I don't wanna wait until the morning
Tim
Please
Don't leave
Fuck!
Merci à Steph pour la transcription www thelwordsite tk
Synchro : Benouchette www forom com