1
00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:42,417
(WIND WHISTLING SOFTLY)

2
00:00:47,256 --> 00:00:49,258
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

3
00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:00,769
{\an8}(UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

4
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:04,982
{\an8}MAN: <i>Agatha Christie's</i>
The Mousetrap.

5
00:01:05,858 --> 00:01:10,237
{\an8}<i>In my opinion, a second-rate
murder mystery.</i> (SCOFFS)

6
00:01:11,196 --> 00:01:13,532
{\an8}<i>Not that I've seen
it, you understand.</i>

7
00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:15,367
<i>But it's a whodunit.</i>

8
00:01:15,534 --> 00:01:17,703
<i>You've seen one,
you've seen 'em all.</i>

9
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:21,582
<i>You know the drill.</i>

10
00:01:21,748 --> 00:01:23,250
<i>An interminable prologue</i>

11
00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:26,044
<i>in which all the key
players are introduced.</i>

12
00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:28,130
<i>You get a sense of the
world they inhabit,</i>

13
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:32,509
<i>and then the most unlikable
character gets bumped off.</i>

14
00:01:32,593 --> 00:01:34,261
There's been a murder?

15
00:01:34,845 --> 00:01:37,848
MAN:<i> Cue the entrance of
a world-weary detective,</i>

16
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:40,726
<i>who comes in and
pokes his nose around.</i>

17
00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:43,854
<i>Talks to witnesses. Takes
a couple of wrong turns.</i>

18
00:01:45,731 --> 00:01:48,650
<i>And then gathers all the
suspects in the drawing room</i>

19
00:01:48,734 --> 00:01:51,195
<i>and points the finger at
the least likely chump</i>

20
00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:53,363
<i>because of the way the guy,</i>

21
00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:54,990
<i>I don't know,</i>

22
00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:56,783
<i>ties his shoelaces.</i>

23
00:01:56,950 --> 00:02:01,079
Now you've seen our play,
you're an accomplice to murder.

24
00:02:01,413 --> 00:02:04,750
And so, we ask you to remember

25
00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:07,711
that it is very much
in your interests

26
00:02:07,794 --> 00:02:12,382
not to tell a soul outside
of this theater who done it.

27
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:14,009
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS)

28
00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:15,594
MAN: <i>But what do I know?</i>

29
00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:17,763
<i>The Limeys, they just lap it up.</i>

30
00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:20,557
<i>- The play's a smash hit.
</i>- (MAN CLEARS THROAT)

31
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:22,893
<i>Not to mention a cash cow.</i>

32
00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:27,439
<i>Right there is the milkmaid
in chief, Petula Spencer.</i>

33
00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:37,658
(RAT SQUEAKING)

34
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,703
(MUSIC INTENSIFIES)

35
00:02:41,787 --> 00:02:44,456
- (UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC RESUMES)
- (LAUGHTER AND CHATTER)

36
00:02:45,624 --> 00:02:50,838
<i>This lavish affair is a party to
celebrate the 100th performance.</i>

37
00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:52,881
<i>No wonder film
producer John Woolf</i>

38
00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:56,176
<i>wants to turn the play into
a major motion picture.</i>

39
00:02:56,343 --> 00:03:00,347
<i>Here he is now in the arms of
his slightly paranoid wife.</i>

40
00:03:00,430 --> 00:03:02,808
I sense that death
is close at hand.

41
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:04,935
It's probably just a draft.

42
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,604
MAN: <i>This is where I come in.</i>

43
00:03:07,771 --> 00:03:09,398
<i>Leo Kopernick's the name.</i>

44
00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:12,442
<i>Big-shot Hollywood director.</i>

45
00:03:12,651 --> 00:03:14,778
<i>Hired to make the
film adaptation</i>

46
00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:17,990
<i>marginally less boring
than the play. </i>(CHUCKLES)

47
00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:22,703
<i>Easier said than done when the
writer's a giant pompous ass.</i>

48
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:25,122
<i>Mervyn Cocker-Norris.</i>

49
00:03:25,289 --> 00:03:27,082
I say, you're rather tall.

50
00:03:27,249 --> 00:03:29,585
Am I? Haven't really thought
about it, to be honest.

51
00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:31,086
Is that what happened here?

52
00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:34,047
Sort of. I had a bit of
an accident backstage.

53
00:03:34,131 --> 00:03:37,885
LEO: <i>Sure, he's educated and
he knows a lot of $10 words,</i>

54
00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:41,013
<i>but it's like he's never
seen a film before,</i>

55
00:03:41,096 --> 00:03:42,598
<i>let alone try to write one.</i>

56
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,683
Oh,<i> ma vattinne!</i>

57
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:47,603
<i>Chi è chistu?</i>

58
00:03:48,187 --> 00:03:49,396
No one important.

59
00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:52,107
<i>Omm, femmina o bestia,
basta che respira!</i>

60
00:03:52,191 --> 00:03:55,485
You know, at times you do rather
overdo the temperamental Neapolitan.

61
00:03:56,111 --> 00:03:57,946
That's a nice jacket.

62
00:04:00,699 --> 00:04:03,911
Say, why don't you scare me up
a real drink, will you, kid?

63
00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:09,499
Like a pint of rye or bourbon
or motor oil, if you have to.

64
00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:12,336
Yeah. Hop to it, now, huh?

65
00:04:12,503 --> 00:04:15,547
<i>In England, that actually
counts as good service.</i>

66
00:04:15,631 --> 00:04:17,548
<i>I was stationed
here during the war</i>

67
00:04:17,632 --> 00:04:20,636
<i>and, if anything, the
locals are more uptight now</i>

68
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:23,096
<i>than when they had the
Luftwaffe overhead.</i>

69
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,431
Mervyn?

70
00:04:25,933 --> 00:04:28,060
Shouldn't you be home? I
thought we had a deadline.

71
00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:29,645
I thought so too.

72
00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:32,314
But then our esteemed director
tore up the screenplay

73
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:34,650
and told me to start
all over again.

74
00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:37,736
He's of the opinion that a modern
audience will walk out in protest

75
00:04:37,819 --> 00:04:41,573
if they're not served at least one
violent death in the opening frames.

76
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:44,743
Suffice to say, we are no
longer on speaking terms.

77
00:04:45,452 --> 00:04:47,329
Merv! (SPITS)

78
00:04:47,412 --> 00:04:50,290
London's most sensitive
writer. (CHUCKLES)

79
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,543
How is <i>The Mousetrap,</i> huh?

80
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:53,986
Did they catch the
guy who did it?

81
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:56,296
I will not stand
here and be insulted.

82
00:04:58,382 --> 00:05:00,026
Well, I guess he's gonna go
over there and be insulted.

83
00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:01,051
WOOLF: Huh.

84
00:05:01,844 --> 00:05:05,180
LEO: (GROANS) <i>What passes
for glamour in these parts.</i>

85
00:05:05,681 --> 00:05:08,100
<i>Sheila Sim and
Dickie Attenborough.</i>

86
00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:11,311
<i>Kid likes the sound
of his own voice.</i>

87
00:05:11,395 --> 00:05:13,397
<i>Even money, he makes a speech.</i>

88
00:05:13,564 --> 00:05:15,524
I suppose I ought
to say a few words.

89
00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:16,692
Not too many.

90
00:05:16,859 --> 00:05:19,361
- And when have I ever?
- Our wedding, remember?

91
00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:20,737
We almost missed the honeymoon.

92
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:21,864
Yes.

93
00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:23,866
Darlings, you're ever so kind.

94
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:27,870
I'd like to ask you all to
raise a metaphorical bat

95
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:29,580
to the old pavilion.

96
00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:32,499
<i>The Mousetrap</i> is 100, not out.

97
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:34,209
- Cheers!
- ALL: Cheers!

98
00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:37,838
LEO: <i>I tell you what
else is 100 not out.</i>

99
00:05:38,297 --> 00:05:40,007
<i>Petula's mother.</i>

100
00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:43,427
(CHUCKLES)<i> The old kook's
just crazy about seafood.</i>

101
00:05:43,594 --> 00:05:45,679
They just brought out
more langoustines.

102
00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:46,805
(CRAB LEG SNAPS)

103
00:05:48,056 --> 00:05:50,726
Excuse me, I just need
to deal with that.

104
00:05:51,226 --> 00:05:52,269
Mother! Please,

105
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,792
- you've had quite enough.
- LEO: Hi.

106
00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,690
<i>Now, I'm not one to tell
tales out of school,</i>

107
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,817
<i>but the girls over here,</i>

108
00:05:58,901 --> 00:06:04,323
<i>they go wild for an American accent
and the promise of a pair of nylons.</i>

109
00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:05,490
<i>But the husbands...</i>

110
00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:08,118
Right. I think it's time
someone taught you a lesson.

111
00:06:08,327 --> 00:06:09,995
LEO: <i>they're not
so easily won over.</i>

112
00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:12,915
It's only fair to warn you that
I learned to box in the RAF.

113
00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:16,126
Yeah? Well, I learned to fly
a plane in Gleason's Gym.

114
00:06:17,628 --> 00:06:19,505
(GUESTS EXCLAIM)

115
00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:20,672
(MUSIC ENDS)

116
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:25,886
<i>All of which explains, in an
admittedly roundabout fashion,</i>

117
00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:29,139
<i>how I come to be in the
theater's backstage area</i>

118
00:06:29,223 --> 00:06:31,266
<i>in need of a change of clothes.</i>

119
00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:41,193
(SOFT CREAK)

120
00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,113
Hello?

121
00:07:05,801 --> 00:07:06,802
(SCOFFS)

122
00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:11,223
(METAL SQUEAKS IN DISTANCE)

123
00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:18,605
Hello?

124
00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:21,692
(FLOORBOARD CREAKS)

125
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:23,485
(GRUNTS)

126
00:07:23,569 --> 00:07:25,821
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

127
00:07:28,866 --> 00:07:29,992
(LEO GROANS)

128
00:07:47,718 --> 00:07:49,553
(GAGGING)

129
00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:04,568
(GASPING)

130
00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:06,236
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

131
00:08:17,289 --> 00:08:18,457
Aw, jeez.

132
00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:20,918
(MUSIC HALTS)

133
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:23,587
<i>I guess I should have
seen this coming.</i>

134
00:08:23,754 --> 00:08:26,757
<i>It's always the most unlikable
character who gets bumped off.</i>

135
00:08:27,299 --> 00:08:29,468
- (THUMP)
- (DRAMATIC NOTE PLAYS)

136
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:31,178
<i>It's a whodunit.</i>

137
00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:34,014
<i>You've seen one,
you've seen 'em all.</i>

138
00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:36,183
- (DRAMATIC NOTE PLAYS)
- (THUNDER RUMBLING)

139
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:49,029
(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING)

140
00:08:53,534 --> 00:08:55,911
(THUNDER CONTINUES RUMBLING)

141
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:58,664
(ENGINE REVS)

142
00:08:58,747 --> 00:08:59,873
(TIRES SQUEAL)

143
00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:10,926
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

144
00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:12,135
We're closed.

145
00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:16,139
- (DOOR RATTLING)
- Clear off.

146
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:19,476
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

147
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,561
Honestly.

148
00:09:24,439 --> 00:09:27,317
Oh, I'm so sorry, sir.
Inspector, uh, Stoppard, sir.

149
00:09:27,526 --> 00:09:30,153
Sorry, I was under strict
instructions not to let anyone in.

150
00:09:30,237 --> 00:09:31,238
Just open the door.

151
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:33,424
Yes, sir. Of course. Sorry,
I didn't recognize you, sir.

152
00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,659
I've actually, uh, just
been transferred myself.

153
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:38,120
Thought it was Leeke and
Priestley on rotation tonight.

154
00:09:38,579 --> 00:09:40,372
- (BUMPS)
- Careful, sir.

155
00:09:40,831 --> 00:09:41,832
In you come.

156
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,208
(STOPPARD SIGHS)

157
00:09:49,047 --> 00:09:50,716
- Constable.
- Stalker, sir.

158
00:09:51,967 --> 00:09:53,844
God, you're all
wet through, sir.

159
00:09:54,011 --> 00:09:55,929
Hope you don't catch
a cold after that.

160
00:09:56,013 --> 00:09:57,139
Yep, after you, sir.

161
00:10:00,893 --> 00:10:03,937
Victim's name is Leo Kopernick,
sir. The film director.

162
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:06,231
Suspected Communist,
blacklisted in Hollywood,

163
00:10:06,315 --> 00:10:08,942
so he came out here to work
on a picture for John Woolf.

164
00:10:09,902 --> 00:10:11,778
You know John Woolf,
the film producer.

165
00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:14,239
He made <i>The African Queen</i>
with Humphrey Bogart.

166
00:10:14,323 --> 00:10:15,800
(IMITATING ACTOR)
"Nature, Mr. Allnut,

167
00:10:15,824 --> 00:10:18,243
"is what we are put in
this world to rise above."

168
00:10:19,036 --> 00:10:20,954
That didn't sound
anything like Bogart.

169
00:10:21,038 --> 00:10:22,473
No, that was Katharine
Hepburn, sir.

170
00:10:22,497 --> 00:10:24,833
She's in it too.
Wonderful actress.

171
00:10:25,042 --> 00:10:27,127
I go to the pictures
quite a lot, actually.

172
00:10:27,211 --> 00:10:28,587
It's the escape, I suppose.

173
00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:29,898
The romance of
the silver screen.

174
00:10:29,922 --> 00:10:30,962
Yes, thank you, Constable.

175
00:10:31,006 --> 00:10:32,132
Yes, sir.

176
00:10:33,592 --> 00:10:35,177
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

177
00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:38,388
(CHATTER QUIETS)

178
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:51,527
(WOMAN COUGHS)

179
00:10:55,614 --> 00:10:57,449
Eh, signs of a struggle.

180
00:10:58,492 --> 00:11:00,220
STALKER: Actually, sir,
I believe that happened

181
00:11:00,244 --> 00:11:01,578
when Mrs. Boyle was killed.

182
00:11:01,662 --> 00:11:02,996
Mrs. Boyle? Who's...

183
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:05,123
Yes, sir. Um...

184
00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:06,807
She's that woman in
the front row there.

185
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,213
Well, she seems to
have bounced back.

186
00:11:12,130 --> 00:11:13,215
Oh. (CHUCKLES)

187
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:16,468
Sorry, sir. No, she was killed
in the play. Also strangled.

188
00:11:16,552 --> 00:11:18,432
Not that I've seen it,
although I would like to.

189
00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:21,723
It's an Agatha Christie,
and I do like a good murder.

190
00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:23,725
Yes, thank you, Constable.

191
00:11:23,809 --> 00:11:24,810
Yes, sir.

192
00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:29,606
(EERIE MUSIC PLAYING)

193
00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:35,737
A ski did that, sir.

194
00:11:36,572 --> 00:11:38,282
They use it in the
play, apparently.

195
00:11:38,574 --> 00:11:39,950
As I said, I haven't seen it.

196
00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:44,121
And then the large dent in the
cranium is a sewing machine.

197
00:11:44,496 --> 00:11:46,707
Seems he was killed in the
costume store initially,

198
00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:48,584
and then he was deposited here.

199
00:11:50,502 --> 00:11:52,379
Staged, so to speak. (CHUCKLES)

200
00:11:54,715 --> 00:11:55,716
Sorry, sir.

201
00:12:04,016 --> 00:12:06,351
Yeah, that's the ski that
he took in the face, sir.

202
00:12:06,435 --> 00:12:09,021
And, uh, I'm afraid it
was downhill from there.

203
00:12:10,314 --> 00:12:12,149
Oh. Sorry, sir.

204
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:13,992
That one just came out
on its own. (CHUCKLES)

205
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:17,613
(STALKER CLEARS THROAT)

206
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:23,994
Seems he came down here
for a change of clothes.

207
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:27,414
Why?

208
00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:36,715
It was a party to celebrate
the 100th performance, sir.

209
00:12:36,882 --> 00:12:38,091
The other nought must have...

210
00:12:38,175 --> 00:12:40,844
When the victim
upset the sponge.

211
00:12:41,178 --> 00:12:45,557
Um, and he then proceeded to sit
in the assortment of crustaceans.

212
00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:48,185
- (GRUNTS)
- (GUESTS EXCLAIM)

213
00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:55,067
I'm told he was intoxicated,
sir, as a newt. (CHUCKLES)

214
00:12:56,026 --> 00:12:58,820
This was actually a lot more
fun than I thought it would be.

215
00:13:00,155 --> 00:13:01,657
(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYS)

216
00:13:05,369 --> 00:13:08,121
Then he left. No one saw him again
until the body was discovered.

217
00:13:08,205 --> 00:13:09,331
That's correct, sir.

218
00:13:10,874 --> 00:13:13,293
(SIGHS) Perhaps they were
all in on it together, sir?

219
00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:18,465
STOPPARD: Hmm.

220
00:13:23,387 --> 00:13:24,388
(SOFT CRUNCH)

221
00:13:26,849 --> 00:13:27,891
(CAMERA FLASHBULB POPS)

222
00:13:30,394 --> 00:13:33,146
Looks like the killer tried to
pull out the victim's tongue.

223
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:35,315
Why would anyone do
a thing like that?

224
00:13:35,941 --> 00:13:38,527
Excuse me, Chief Inspector.

225
00:13:38,610 --> 00:13:39,611
It's just "Inspector."

226
00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,822
Yes. Of course. Inspector.

227
00:13:41,989 --> 00:13:43,740
I hate to interrupt, I do.

228
00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:44,968
There really is nothing worse...

229
00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:47,578
Petula Spencer, sir.
Prominent theater impresario.

230
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:48,787
Yes, thank you, Constable.

231
00:13:48,871 --> 00:13:52,958
Tell me, how much longer do you
intend to keep us all hostage here?

232
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:56,003
Or is that the idea? "Let
the galled jade wince."

233
00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:58,505
Gather all the
suspects under one roof

234
00:13:58,589 --> 00:14:01,300
and then interrogate each of us in
turn until the mystery is solved?

235
00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,427
Mervyn Cocker-Norris,
overrated playwright.

236
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,095
Celebrated playwright.

237
00:14:06,013 --> 00:14:07,264
Oh, I'm so sorry, sir.

238
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:09,016
I can't read me own handwriting.

239
00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:11,310
Not that we are
suspects, necessarily.

240
00:14:13,937 --> 00:14:14,938
Are we suspects?

241
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:20,611
It was just a reference to Agatha
Christie and her penchant for denouement,

242
00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:23,113
in which the detective
gathers the susp...

243
00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:25,490
I dare say, that's not...

244
00:14:26,325 --> 00:14:28,368
- Please continue.
- Yes, thank you, Mervyn.

245
00:14:28,452 --> 00:14:30,287
Inspector, I want you to know

246
00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:33,207
that I have nothing
but the utmost respect

247
00:14:33,290 --> 00:14:35,083
for the Metropolitan Police.

248
00:14:35,334 --> 00:14:37,878
But, well, do you think you
might be finished in time

249
00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:39,161
for curtain up tomorrow night?

250
00:14:39,213 --> 00:14:40,297
Oh, for goodness' sake.

251
00:14:40,380 --> 00:14:42,090
John Woolf, esteemed
film producer.

252
00:14:42,174 --> 00:14:43,467
Yes, thank you, Constable.

253
00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:45,427
This is a murder investigation.

254
00:14:45,511 --> 00:14:48,972
Surely that takes
precedence, sold out or not.

255
00:14:49,056 --> 00:14:51,201
Yes, it's all going to plan
for you, isn't it, Woolfie?

256
00:14:51,225 --> 00:14:52,559
You want the run to end.

257
00:14:52,643 --> 00:14:54,728
WOOLF: (SCOFFS) I want
nothing of the sort.

258
00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:56,703
It's the decent thing
to do, that's all.

259
00:14:56,772 --> 00:14:59,274
Close the theater out
of respect for Leo.

260
00:14:59,358 --> 00:15:00,651
Such a tragic loss.

261
00:15:00,734 --> 00:15:05,113
Inspector, I implore
you not to overreact.

262
00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:08,617
I would hate to have to
go over your head and

263
00:15:09,243 --> 00:15:11,620
talk directly to your superiors.

264
00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,681
Oh, we wouldn't want that,
now, would we, madam?

265
00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:15,666
But I'm afraid that
under the circumstances,

266
00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:17,793
- as a precaution...
- Precaution?

267
00:15:18,627 --> 00:15:19,920
He's already dead.

268
00:15:20,128 --> 00:15:21,463
STOPPARD: He is, madam.

269
00:15:21,797 --> 00:15:24,132
But until we have an idea
as to a likely motive,

270
00:15:24,216 --> 00:15:26,343
who's to say this
is the end of it?

271
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:27,886
What is that supposed to mean?

272
00:15:28,428 --> 00:15:30,639
We are no longer
merely suspects.

273
00:15:31,139 --> 00:15:33,976
We are also potential victims.

274
00:15:35,644 --> 00:15:37,164
- (CAMERA FLASHBULB POPS)
- PETULA: Oh.

275
00:15:37,396 --> 00:15:38,397
WOMAN: Mmm.

276
00:15:38,939 --> 00:15:41,775
Oh, God, I wasn't in that,
was I? I must look dreadful.

277
00:15:43,026 --> 00:15:45,279
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

278
00:15:49,700 --> 00:15:51,159
- (TIRES SQUEAL)
- (ENGINE REVS)

279
00:15:56,915 --> 00:15:58,584
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)

280
00:16:07,092 --> 00:16:08,177
Excuse me, sir.

281
00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:17,811
(BLOWS NOSE)

282
00:16:17,895 --> 00:16:19,062
MAN: Stoppard!

283
00:16:19,229 --> 00:16:20,606
My office.

284
00:16:21,565 --> 00:16:23,233
- (KNOCK ON DOOR)
- STOPPARD: Hello, sir.

285
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:26,445
What in God's name possessed you
to close down the Ambassadors?

286
00:16:26,528 --> 00:16:28,071
Uh, protocol, sir.
It's a crime scene.

287
00:16:28,155 --> 00:16:31,450
No, it's a public relations
disaster, is what it is.

288
00:16:31,533 --> 00:16:32,618
Public what, sir?

289
00:16:32,701 --> 00:16:33,952
- Stalker!
- Sir.

290
00:16:34,036 --> 00:16:35,913
Not to put too
fine a point on...

291
00:16:35,996 --> 00:16:37,122
- Yes, please.
- Here.

292
00:16:37,206 --> 00:16:38,933
Not to put too fine a
point on it, Inspector,

293
00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:41,835
but your latest blunder
is front page news.

294
00:16:42,544 --> 00:16:45,380
{\an8}Fleet Street is all over this,
like hot jam on a Devonshire scone.

295
00:16:45,797 --> 00:16:48,717
You are slap-bang
in the crosshairs.

296
00:16:49,426 --> 00:16:50,928
{\an8}Now, we need to do
everything we can

297
00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:53,722
{\an8}to make sure the bullet
doesn't miss you and hit me.

298
00:16:53,889 --> 00:16:55,682
- Yeah, of course, sir. Yes.
- Good.

299
00:16:55,849 --> 00:16:57,726
Then you'll inform
the theater at once.

300
00:16:57,809 --> 00:16:59,436
Well, I thought as
a precaution, I...

301
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:00,938
The Home Secretary

302
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:03,690
is a close, personal
friend of Agatha Christie.

303
00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:06,068
His brother-in-law
is Rex Harrison.

304
00:17:06,151 --> 00:17:07,152
Wonderful actor.

305
00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:08,505
- Yes, thank you, Constable.
- Sir.

306
00:17:08,529 --> 00:17:11,409
It's actually worked in our favor to
have the press distracted like this.

307
00:17:11,490 --> 00:17:14,910
It means we can keep a lid on
the Rillington Place murders.

308
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:17,996
Rillington Place murders.
Yes. What's that?

309
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:19,705
(SIGHS) Blimey.

310
00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:20,874
Haven't you heard?

311
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:23,752
We have a serial
killer on the loose.

312
00:17:23,836 --> 00:17:26,171
You didn't think all of this
was for you, now, did you?

313
00:17:28,006 --> 00:17:29,424
- No, of course...
- No.

314
00:17:29,508 --> 00:17:31,385
- (BOTH CHUCKLE)
- Of course not.

315
00:17:31,844 --> 00:17:35,347
Well, have all the resources been
allocated to this other investigation?

316
00:17:35,430 --> 00:17:37,182
No, not all of them, no.

317
00:17:38,016 --> 00:17:40,894
I understand you, uh, met
WPC Stalker last night?

318
00:17:41,103 --> 00:17:42,187
I did, yes.

319
00:17:42,396 --> 00:17:43,939
- Constable.
- Inspector.

320
00:17:44,022 --> 00:17:46,859
A very capable officer.

321
00:17:48,110 --> 00:17:50,612
Or at least she will be once
she gets the proper instruction.

322
00:17:51,613 --> 00:17:53,073
Sorry, sir, I'm
not sure I, uh...

323
00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:54,436
You don't mean you want me to...

324
00:17:54,491 --> 00:17:56,952
Yes, I do. I'd like you
to show her the ropes.

325
00:17:57,327 --> 00:18:00,127
I'm hoping some of her enthusiasm
for police work might rub off on you.

326
00:18:01,123 --> 00:18:03,166
But the, uh, bullet,
sir. Is that why...

327
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,502
This is not a debate, Stoppard.

328
00:18:05,878 --> 00:18:08,630
I have a reputation
as a modernizer.

329
00:18:08,714 --> 00:18:10,632
I have to be seen to keep it up.

330
00:18:10,799 --> 00:18:13,385
I have said in public

331
00:18:13,594 --> 00:18:16,638
that I think women are
the future of the force.

332
00:18:16,805 --> 00:18:19,183
Absolutely, sir, I agree.

333
00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:20,910
(CHUCKLING) But
we're not looking

334
00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:22,227
- for stolen sweets...
- Sweets.

335
00:18:22,311 --> 00:18:23,896
Or a lost bleeding bicycle.

336
00:18:24,062 --> 00:18:26,690
This is a murder investigation,
and she is inexperienced.

337
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:30,152
They were inexperienced
in the war.

338
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:32,863
Ask Jerry how that turned out.

339
00:18:32,946 --> 00:18:34,198
Yes, sir. But, uh...

340
00:18:34,364 --> 00:18:35,407
- That...
- Huh?

341
00:18:35,490 --> 00:18:38,702
- Will be all.
- Thank you.

342
00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:40,746
- Commissioner.
- Inspector.

343
00:18:41,914 --> 00:18:43,874
- STOPPARD: Constable.
- Inspector.

344
00:18:45,125 --> 00:18:46,919
- Commissioner.
- Constable.

345
00:18:47,169 --> 00:18:49,338
Um, sorry again about
last night, sir.

346
00:18:49,421 --> 00:18:50,482
With the rain and everything...

347
00:18:50,506 --> 00:18:52,233
Water under the bridge,
Constable. No harm done.

348
00:18:52,257 --> 00:18:53,258
(SNEEZES)

349
00:18:53,342 --> 00:18:55,385
(PLAYFUL JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

350
00:18:55,469 --> 00:18:57,471
(STOPPARD SNIFFLES, GROANS)

351
00:18:59,014 --> 00:19:00,724
- (SNEEZES)
- You all right?

352
00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:04,853
Yeah. Do we have an
address for the victim?

353
00:19:05,062 --> 00:19:09,149
Yep. It is "Laurel
Canyon, Hollywood, USA."

354
00:19:10,776 --> 00:19:13,195
Where was he staying
in England, Constable?

355
00:19:14,655 --> 00:19:16,156
Oh. Um...

356
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,950
(TUTS) Right.

357
00:19:18,033 --> 00:19:20,452
(PLAYFUL JAZZ MUSIC CONTINUES)

358
00:19:35,926 --> 00:19:37,219
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)

359
00:19:38,804 --> 00:19:42,975
If I am honest, <i>Monsieur</i> Kopernick,
he was not a very good guest.

360
00:19:43,141 --> 00:19:44,226
In arrears, was he?

361
00:19:44,309 --> 00:19:47,437
<i>Là, non,</i> but he did
not pay for his room.

362
00:19:47,896 --> 00:19:49,231
<i>Monsieur</i> Woolf did.

363
00:19:49,314 --> 00:19:50,357
STALKER: Hmm.

364
00:19:51,859 --> 00:19:53,735
What part of France
are you from, sir?

365
00:19:54,570 --> 00:19:55,654
Belgium.

366
00:19:56,154 --> 00:19:57,197
Ah, right.

367
00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:03,704
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

368
00:20:03,787 --> 00:20:05,914
- (DOOR CLOSES)
- STOPPARD: Oh, my, my.

369
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,835
What a bloody pigsty.

370
00:20:10,335 --> 00:20:12,963
They don't clean the
rooms at the Savoy?

371
00:20:13,172 --> 00:20:15,132
<i>Hélas</i>, not this one.

372
00:20:15,924 --> 00:20:16,967
STOPPARD: Hmm.

373
00:20:17,050 --> 00:20:18,385
The maids, they refuse.

374
00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:23,056
We offer them more money,
but still they say <i>non.</i>

375
00:20:24,016 --> 00:20:25,184
There was

376
00:20:26,143 --> 00:20:27,311
an incident.

377
00:20:28,687 --> 00:20:32,441
Always <i>avec Monsieur</i> Kopernick,
there was an incident.

378
00:20:38,322 --> 00:20:39,323
STALKER: Hmm.

379
00:20:51,460 --> 00:20:52,461
Ooh.

380
00:20:53,378 --> 00:20:54,880
STOPPARD: Thank you, Constable.

381
00:20:54,963 --> 00:20:56,548
Oh. Sorry, sir.

382
00:20:57,132 --> 00:20:59,468
Did one of these incidents
ever turn violent?

383
00:21:00,135 --> 00:21:02,346
<i>Oui. Une fois.</i>

384
00:21:02,429 --> 00:21:04,139
(ROUSING MUSIC PLAYS)

385
00:21:04,264 --> 00:21:05,933
MERVYN: How dare you
call me a bad writer!

386
00:21:06,016 --> 00:21:07,494
LEO: I didn't say that.
I said it's bad writing.

387
00:21:07,518 --> 00:21:10,038
MERVYN: I did the best I could
within the confines of the genre,

388
00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:11,480
and Woolf loved it!

389
00:21:11,563 --> 00:21:14,167
LEO: Woolf wouldn't know a good script
if it came up and bit him on the ass.

390
00:21:14,191 --> 00:21:16,735
- It's horseshit!
- No, it isn't! Not all of it!

391
00:21:16,818 --> 00:21:18,254
All right, what I
read is horseshit!

392
00:21:18,278 --> 00:21:20,948
MERVYN: (GASPS) You mean
you didn't even finish it?

393
00:21:21,031 --> 00:21:22,032
I read enough, pal,

394
00:21:22,115 --> 00:21:23,885
to know that nobody gets
killed in the first 10 pages!

395
00:21:23,909 --> 00:21:26,036
You charlatan! Give it back!

396
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:27,597
- Listen. Listen to me. Listen!
- Give...

397
00:21:27,621 --> 00:21:29,516
We need to go in a completely
different direction!

398
00:21:29,540 --> 00:21:30,624
(MERVYN STRAINING)

399
00:21:30,707 --> 00:21:32,000
- (LEO GRUNTS)
- (YELPS)

400
00:21:32,084 --> 00:21:33,544
(LAMP SHATTERS)

401
00:21:35,212 --> 00:21:36,463
(PANTING)

402
00:21:36,588 --> 00:21:40,259
I'll kill you for this,
Kopernick, you bastard!

403
00:21:43,804 --> 00:21:46,223
That's that then, sir. It's
as good as a confession.

404
00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:49,434
Let's not jump to
conclusions, Constable.

405
00:21:49,810 --> 00:21:51,061
No, sir.

406
00:21:51,228 --> 00:21:53,564
The least we can do is
talk to this other party.

407
00:21:53,730 --> 00:21:55,524
Yes, sir. Cocker-Norris, sir.

408
00:21:58,151 --> 00:21:59,712
STOPPARD: Tell me, do
you write everything down

409
00:21:59,736 --> 00:22:01,238
in that little notebook?

410
00:22:01,905 --> 00:22:03,866
Only if it's important, sir.

411
00:22:04,032 --> 00:22:05,659
How do you know
if it's important?

412
00:22:07,035 --> 00:22:08,120
Well,

413
00:22:08,954 --> 00:22:12,749
uh, I'll just sort of put
everything in as we go,

414
00:22:12,833 --> 00:22:15,085
and then down the line when
we know what's important,

415
00:22:15,169 --> 00:22:17,171
we'll know that it's
already in the notebook.

416
00:22:20,132 --> 00:22:21,508
So you do write everything down.

417
00:22:21,592 --> 00:22:22,718
Yeah, everything.

418
00:22:23,427 --> 00:22:24,720
That's what I thought.

419
00:22:26,555 --> 00:22:27,890
(ENGINE STARTS)

420
00:22:29,808 --> 00:22:32,644
(OPERATIC SONG PLAYING)

421
00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:40,903
MERVYN: Make yourself comfortable.
You're just in time for elevenses.

422
00:23:02,216 --> 00:23:03,425
- (STOPPARD GRUNTS)
- Oh.

423
00:23:04,885 --> 00:23:07,638
(SONG CONTINUES PLAYING)

424
00:23:13,685 --> 00:23:14,686
Oh!

425
00:23:15,729 --> 00:23:16,730
(DOOR OPENS)

426
00:23:17,773 --> 00:23:18,774
(DOOR CLOSES)

427
00:23:20,192 --> 00:23:21,193
(OPERA STOPS)

428
00:23:21,693 --> 00:23:23,820
You must excuse the <i>désordre,</i>

429
00:23:24,446 --> 00:23:26,448
it's research for
the film adaptation.

430
00:23:26,573 --> 00:23:29,326
Police statements, court
reports, newspaper cuttings.

431
00:23:29,910 --> 00:23:32,371
<i>The Mousetrap</i> is actually
based on a real-life case.

432
00:23:33,038 --> 00:23:34,039
Nettle tea?

433
00:23:34,581 --> 00:23:37,417
I appreciate you've not yet
had time to come to terms

434
00:23:37,501 --> 00:23:38,978
with the death of
Mr. Kopernick, but...

435
00:23:39,002 --> 00:23:40,838
Is it true his tongue
was pulled out?

436
00:23:40,921 --> 00:23:42,721
(CHUCKLING) I'm afraid
I can't divulge details

437
00:23:42,756 --> 00:23:43,817
of an ongoing investigation.

438
00:23:43,841 --> 00:23:45,008
It was disgusting.

439
00:23:45,092 --> 00:23:47,886
- (DOOR OPENS)
<i>- Amore, non pozzo faticà così!</i>

440
00:23:47,970 --> 00:23:49,012
What?

441
00:23:49,972 --> 00:23:51,723
<i>È na cos' 'e pazz!</i>

442
00:23:51,807 --> 00:23:53,433
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS)

443
00:23:58,105 --> 00:23:59,106
(CHUCKLES LIGHTLY)

444
00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:02,818
That's Gio. Nephew of
mine. Very hotheaded.

445
00:24:03,652 --> 00:24:05,362
I wonder if it
isn't all the fumes.

446
00:24:05,445 --> 00:24:06,822
You know, from the chemicals.

447
00:24:06,905 --> 00:24:08,574
He's an amateur taxidermist.

448
00:24:09,199 --> 00:24:11,785
He has a fascination
with the macabre.

449
00:24:12,661 --> 00:24:14,454
I call it his
Stymphalian Bird series.

450
00:24:14,955 --> 00:24:16,039
STOPPARD: Hmm.

451
00:24:16,164 --> 00:24:19,710
MERVYN: Macabre in a strictly
"ornithological" sense, that is.

452
00:24:22,838 --> 00:24:24,464
You wanted to ask me about Leo?

453
00:24:24,548 --> 00:24:26,967
STOPPARD: We heard there was
an argument at the Savoy,

454
00:24:27,050 --> 00:24:28,810
and I noticed you had
the other half of this.

455
00:24:34,725 --> 00:24:37,561
Inspector, that was a
<i>contretemps,</i> nothing more.

456
00:24:37,936 --> 00:24:40,022
(SOFTLY) Read that part. Yeah.

457
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:43,692
"I'll kill you for this,
Kopernick, you bastard."

458
00:24:47,029 --> 00:24:48,280
Well, obviously, I...

459
00:24:48,363 --> 00:24:49,907
Taken out of context, I...

460
00:24:50,282 --> 00:24:54,036
Those words were spoken in anger
and under extreme provocation.

461
00:24:54,953 --> 00:24:57,247
We had creative
differences, that's all.

462
00:24:58,040 --> 00:24:59,082
STOPPARD: Hmm.

463
00:24:59,583 --> 00:25:01,210
How did you like <i>The Mousetrap?</i>

464
00:25:02,002 --> 00:25:03,670
- Oh, yeah, the play?
- Mmm.

465
00:25:03,754 --> 00:25:05,589
Yeah, I, uh... I
didn't see it yet.

466
00:25:05,672 --> 00:25:06,673
Well, if you'd like,

467
00:25:06,757 --> 00:25:07,984
- I can précis this...
- No, no, no.

468
00:25:08,008 --> 00:25:10,511
I got the basics. It's
a whodunit, right?

469
00:25:10,594 --> 00:25:14,306
So, you got a dead
body, a detective,

470
00:25:14,473 --> 00:25:17,309
and then all the suspects
rather conveniently

471
00:25:17,392 --> 00:25:19,561
end up in a remote
country house together.

472
00:25:20,145 --> 00:25:21,146
In a nutshell.

473
00:25:21,313 --> 00:25:24,566
Our task will be to present
this improbable series of events

474
00:25:24,650 --> 00:25:26,485
to an audience of
moderate intelligence

475
00:25:26,568 --> 00:25:28,946
in a manner that does not
cause too much offense.

476
00:25:29,154 --> 00:25:30,447
Easy.

477
00:25:30,614 --> 00:25:31,823
Flashbacks.

478
00:25:32,241 --> 00:25:33,742
No.

479
00:25:34,368 --> 00:25:35,452
No what?

480
00:25:35,619 --> 00:25:36,912
No flashbacks.

481
00:25:37,412 --> 00:25:39,289
<i>They are crass, lazy,
and they interrupt</i>

482
00:25:39,373 --> 00:25:40,582
the flow of the story.

483
00:25:40,749 --> 00:25:44,294
In my opinion, they are the last
refuge of a moribund imagination.

484
00:25:44,795 --> 00:25:45,796
Whatever next?

485
00:25:45,879 --> 00:25:48,215
A caption that says,
"Three weeks later"?

486
00:25:48,382 --> 00:25:50,092
(DRAMATIC NOTE PLAYS)

487
00:25:50,759 --> 00:25:51,760
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

488
00:25:51,844 --> 00:25:54,263
Merv. Merv, will you come on?

489
00:25:54,429 --> 00:25:55,824
This is crazy. Will
you open the door?

490
00:25:55,848 --> 00:25:57,474
I'm not coming out
until Woolf gets here.

491
00:25:57,558 --> 00:25:58,559
(DOOR BUZZES)

492
00:26:00,060 --> 00:26:01,228
What is it this time?

493
00:26:01,395 --> 00:26:02,521
I'll tell you what it is.

494
00:26:02,896 --> 00:26:04,064
I pitched a new ending,

495
00:26:04,231 --> 00:26:06,942
Cockamamie-Novice over here
locks himself in the bathroom.

496
00:26:07,109 --> 00:26:08,735
Is this instead
of the car chase?

497
00:26:08,902 --> 00:26:09,987
As well as.

498
00:26:10,070 --> 00:26:13,490
I think he thinks "denouement"
is French for "shootout."

499
00:26:14,157 --> 00:26:17,160
Will you at least hear me out first,
and then tell me you don't like it?

500
00:26:18,203 --> 00:26:21,456
Come on, I storyboarded it
for you. Come on, have a seat.

501
00:26:21,957 --> 00:26:23,434
MERVYN: Why can't we
just have the detective

502
00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:27,462
gather everyone in the drawing room
and then reveal to them who did it?

503
00:26:27,629 --> 00:26:30,507
Why? 'Cause it's
old, it's tired.

504
00:26:30,716 --> 00:26:31,996
It's been done a thousand times.

505
00:26:32,092 --> 00:26:35,304
So then who explains to the
audience what on Earth's going on?

506
00:26:35,387 --> 00:26:36,388
No one.

507
00:26:36,513 --> 00:26:37,931
I don't know. The killer.

508
00:26:38,473 --> 00:26:40,033
Now you see what I
have to put up with?

509
00:26:40,058 --> 00:26:41,393
Will you please have a seat?

510
00:26:42,019 --> 00:26:44,563
So, a remote country house.

511
00:26:44,730 --> 00:26:48,025
We got all the, uh, suspects
gathered in the drawing room, right?

512
00:26:48,192 --> 00:26:50,110
So far, soporific.

513
00:26:50,652 --> 00:26:52,821
Suddenly, the lights go out.

514
00:26:52,905 --> 00:26:53,989
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

515
00:26:54,072 --> 00:26:58,035
Our hero grips his Colt
Special, edges into the hall.

516
00:26:59,703 --> 00:27:01,997
The killer's got a hostage,
can't get a clear shot.

517
00:27:02,998 --> 00:27:04,333
Suddenly, kaboom!

518
00:27:04,499 --> 00:27:06,084
The place goes up in flames.

519
00:27:06,168 --> 00:27:07,169
(CARD SHUFFLES)

520
00:27:07,294 --> 00:27:08,295
Blam! Blam!

521
00:27:08,378 --> 00:27:09,922
Our hero plugs the killer.

522
00:27:10,088 --> 00:27:11,340
One in the gut! (GRUNTS)

523
00:27:11,423 --> 00:27:13,050
{\an8}One in the knee! (GROANS)

524
00:27:13,175 --> 00:27:14,301
{\an8}Then, all of a sudden...

525
00:27:14,384 --> 00:27:15,719
{\an8}(MIMICS GUN CLICKING)

526
00:27:16,512 --> 00:27:17,930
{\an8}His goddamned gun jams.

527
00:27:18,305 --> 00:27:19,473
He's a sittin' duck.

528
00:27:21,266 --> 00:27:22,267
Sorry, not that one.

529
00:27:22,351 --> 00:27:23,352
(CARDS SHUFFLING)

530
00:27:23,435 --> 00:27:24,478
I'm sorry about this.

531
00:27:25,437 --> 00:27:26,438
He's a sittin' duck.

532
00:27:26,522 --> 00:27:27,648
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

533
00:27:27,773 --> 00:27:30,484
Our killer, dying but not dead,

534
00:27:31,527 --> 00:27:32,611
takes aim.

535
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:34,905
Boom! He fires.

536
00:27:35,239 --> 00:27:36,240
Out of nowhere,

537
00:27:36,698 --> 00:27:39,326
our hero cop's partner
dives in slow motion!

538
00:27:39,576 --> 00:27:40,577
Takes a bullet!

539
00:27:40,911 --> 00:27:42,079
(GRUNTS)

540
00:27:42,621 --> 00:27:48,293
Our hero cradles his partner
like a father would his child.

541
00:27:48,585 --> 00:27:51,296
His face a gumbo of emotions.

542
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:55,384
We hold on the inferno,

543
00:27:56,969 --> 00:27:59,596
and we pan left,
to a dead butler.

544
00:28:00,556 --> 00:28:01,765
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

545
00:28:01,890 --> 00:28:03,851
Hank Williams plays us out.

546
00:28:05,018 --> 00:28:06,019
<i>I Saw The Light.</i>

547
00:28:14,111 --> 00:28:16,405
- You hate it.
- No, no, I don't hate it.

548
00:28:16,697 --> 00:28:18,699
- But you don't love it.
- Of course he doesn't!

549
00:28:18,949 --> 00:28:20,075
It's preposterous

550
00:28:20,242 --> 00:28:22,322
and totally out of keeping
with the rest of the film.

551
00:28:22,619 --> 00:28:23,620
Oh, who cares?

552
00:28:23,704 --> 00:28:25,723
The audience only ever
remembers the last 20 minutes.

553
00:28:25,747 --> 00:28:27,124
Oh, poppycock.

554
00:28:27,207 --> 00:28:28,709
Uh, Hitchcock, actually.

555
00:28:28,917 --> 00:28:30,377
How does he get the gun?

556
00:28:30,836 --> 00:28:31,837
He's a cop!

557
00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:33,881
Uh, police are not
armed in England.

558
00:28:34,298 --> 00:28:36,341
What? How do they
kill the bad guys?

559
00:28:36,425 --> 00:28:37,426
They don't.

560
00:28:37,509 --> 00:28:40,679
They ask them to stop
in the name of the law.

561
00:28:40,762 --> 00:28:42,181
- (CAR HORN HONKING)
- LEO: Huh.

562
00:28:42,264 --> 00:28:45,642
Well, he fought in the war, so
he kept his service revolver.

563
00:28:46,101 --> 00:28:48,937
God damn it, we're gonna have
to pick this up another time.

564
00:28:50,814 --> 00:28:52,482
Say, uh, Merv.

565
00:28:53,317 --> 00:28:56,111
You wouldn't want to lend
me this pad, would you?

566
00:28:56,278 --> 00:28:57,279
Just for the night.

567
00:28:57,988 --> 00:29:00,824
Only I got this dame parked
outside I wanna impress.

568
00:29:01,158 --> 00:29:03,202
As in, she actually is a dame.

569
00:29:04,286 --> 00:29:06,788
And, well, you know. (CHUCKLES)

570
00:29:06,914 --> 00:29:09,458
My place ain't
exactly the Savoy.

571
00:29:09,625 --> 00:29:12,002
I thought his place
exactly was the Savoy.

572
00:29:12,169 --> 00:29:14,671
No, he didn't take up residence
there till a month later.

573
00:29:15,172 --> 00:29:18,091
And the production company
footed the bill when he did.

574
00:29:18,342 --> 00:29:20,135
How he finagled that,
I'll never know.

575
00:29:20,219 --> 00:29:21,220
(SLURPS)

576
00:29:21,345 --> 00:29:24,056
Either I need a new agent,
or he had dirt on Woolf.

577
00:29:24,473 --> 00:29:25,557
STOPPARD: Hmm.

578
00:29:28,519 --> 00:29:29,603
(SWALLOWS)

579
00:29:29,728 --> 00:29:31,146
Did you ever meet these women?

580
00:29:31,563 --> 00:29:33,232
- (STALKER CLEARS THROAT)
- Who were they?

581
00:29:33,315 --> 00:29:35,984
Oh, girls he met during the
war who had low standards

582
00:29:36,068 --> 00:29:37,486
and even lower self-esteem.

583
00:29:37,569 --> 00:29:38,987
I never had the pleasure.

584
00:29:41,406 --> 00:29:42,407
Oh, wait.

585
00:29:43,617 --> 00:29:44,660
Tell a lie.

586
00:29:44,743 --> 00:29:47,079
(PLAYFUL JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

587
00:29:47,204 --> 00:29:48,664
LEO: Merv! Come on.

588
00:29:48,747 --> 00:29:50,457
When I said we should
tear up the script,

589
00:29:50,541 --> 00:29:51,750
I didn't mean literally!

590
00:29:55,879 --> 00:29:57,130
WOMAN: Hello, Leo.

591
00:29:57,214 --> 00:29:58,340
What is that doing here?

592
00:29:58,423 --> 00:29:59,550
(GASPS)

593
00:29:59,633 --> 00:30:01,051
He was Kopernick's son!

594
00:30:01,218 --> 00:30:02,469
Peas in a pod.

595
00:30:03,053 --> 00:30:04,054
And the mother?

596
00:30:04,221 --> 00:30:07,683
I didn't get a good look. A
plain girl, rather homely.

597
00:30:08,475 --> 00:30:09,935
<i>Dark hair, glasses,</i>

598
00:30:10,102 --> 00:30:11,144
thick lenses.

599
00:30:12,396 --> 00:30:13,998
So there we have it,
sir. <i>Cherchez la femme.</i>

600
00:30:14,022 --> 00:30:15,023
STOPPARD: What?

601
00:30:15,107 --> 00:30:16,751
It's Belgian, sir. It
means, "Look for the woman."

602
00:30:16,775 --> 00:30:19,194
I know what it means,
Constable. What woman?

603
00:30:19,278 --> 00:30:21,405
The mother of Kopernick's
illegitimate son.

604
00:30:21,738 --> 00:30:23,532
Cocker-Norris couldn't
remember her name,

605
00:30:23,615 --> 00:30:25,218
but I bet it's in that
little black book.

606
00:30:25,242 --> 00:30:27,428
You know, the one that you
found in the hotel room, sir.

607
00:30:27,452 --> 00:30:29,037
If we find her, we
have our answer.

608
00:30:29,121 --> 00:30:31,015
We need to get a police sketch
artist down here at once

609
00:30:31,039 --> 00:30:32,416
before he forgets anything.

610
00:30:32,916 --> 00:30:34,084
(STALKER SIGHS)

611
00:30:35,002 --> 00:30:37,462
Mmm. I'm doing it
again, aren't I, sir?

612
00:30:37,880 --> 00:30:39,756
- Jumping to conclusions.
- Conclusions, yeah.

613
00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:40,841
Little bit.

614
00:30:40,924 --> 00:30:41,925
Sorry.

615
00:30:42,509 --> 00:30:43,510
Constable.

616
00:30:45,804 --> 00:30:47,681
I have a very important
mission for you.

617
00:30:47,890 --> 00:30:48,974
Mmm-hmm.

618
00:30:49,057 --> 00:30:51,310
I need you to find
a telephone box.

619
00:30:51,476 --> 00:30:52,477
Call the station.

620
00:30:52,853 --> 00:30:55,439
Get an address for John
Woolf, the film producer.

621
00:30:55,689 --> 00:30:56,899
And I'll wait for you here.

622
00:30:56,982 --> 00:30:59,484
Uh, "Romulus Films, Soho,"
sir. I wrote it down.

623
00:31:00,569 --> 00:31:01,987
- You did?
- Mmm-hmm.

624
00:31:04,198 --> 00:31:05,616
(SMACKS LIPS) Right.

625
00:31:06,408 --> 00:31:08,035
- Well done.
- Thank you.

626
00:31:09,036 --> 00:31:10,204
- (ENGINE STARTS)
- Shall we?

627
00:31:10,287 --> 00:31:12,289
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

628
00:31:18,879 --> 00:31:20,506
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

629
00:31:20,589 --> 00:31:21,965
(BELL RINGS)

630
00:31:22,049 --> 00:31:23,467
Uh, telegram came for you.

631
00:31:26,094 --> 00:31:27,638
- (WOOLF GROANS)
- Bad news?

632
00:31:27,721 --> 00:31:28,722
It's the studio.

633
00:31:28,805 --> 00:31:30,805
Grace Kelly's doing a
Hitchcock picture for Warner,

634
00:31:30,849 --> 00:31:32,601
so it's Dial M for
Maybe Next Time.

635
00:31:32,684 --> 00:31:34,228
- Grace Kelly?
- Yes.

636
00:31:34,311 --> 00:31:35,580
For the part you
promised Sheila?

637
00:31:35,604 --> 00:31:36,813
Yes, that's right.

638
00:31:37,814 --> 00:31:40,150
Which is why this
is such good news.

639
00:31:40,234 --> 00:31:41,235
(WOMAN CLEARS THROAT)

640
00:31:42,569 --> 00:31:43,654
Ann?

641
00:31:43,987 --> 00:31:45,048
Darling, what's the matter?

642
00:31:45,072 --> 00:31:47,449
You do know a promise is only
a promise if you keep it.

643
00:31:47,533 --> 00:31:48,534
What do you mean?

644
00:31:48,617 --> 00:31:49,969
I mean you promised me
a night out months ago.

645
00:31:49,993 --> 00:31:51,203
I have been so busy lately.

646
00:31:51,286 --> 00:31:52,514
Yes, I know. I am
your assistant.

647
00:31:52,538 --> 00:31:54,307
I promise, as soon as I
have a moment to spare...

648
00:31:54,331 --> 00:31:55,791
Well, you're free on Wednesday.

649
00:31:55,874 --> 00:31:57,459
- Am I? Are you sure?
- Mmm. Yes.

650
00:31:57,543 --> 00:31:59,086
- I thought I was...
- No.

651
00:31:59,253 --> 00:32:00,712
No, well, you should know.

652
00:32:00,879 --> 00:32:02,631
You are my assistant, after all.

653
00:32:02,714 --> 00:32:04,383
Well, that's settled,
then. It's a date.

654
00:32:04,466 --> 00:32:05,676
I promise I will take you out.

655
00:32:05,759 --> 00:32:07,445
I'm afraid, Mr. Woolf, you
really must be going now,

656
00:32:07,469 --> 00:32:08,554
otherwise you'll be late.

657
00:32:08,637 --> 00:32:10,305
- Ah, right. Thank you.
- Mmm.

658
00:32:11,473 --> 00:32:12,474
No, I'm serious.

659
00:32:12,558 --> 00:32:13,743
You do actually need
to get back to Romulus.

660
00:32:13,767 --> 00:32:15,018
- Oh. Right. Okay. Yes.
- Yes.

661
00:32:23,026 --> 00:32:24,069
(EXHALES DEEPLY)

662
00:32:24,152 --> 00:32:26,363
This is exciting, isn't it, sir?

663
00:32:27,114 --> 00:32:28,299
I'd say this is
the type of thing

664
00:32:28,323 --> 00:32:30,450
that made you want to become
a police officer, was it?

665
00:32:33,036 --> 00:32:37,416
(SMACKS LIPS) Me? I just
sort of fell into it, really.

666
00:32:38,542 --> 00:32:41,753
They needed people after the war,
and I needed the money, so...

667
00:32:41,837 --> 00:32:43,213
(STOPPARD SIGHS)

668
00:32:43,338 --> 00:32:45,757
No, it's true. The
hours can be unsociable,

669
00:32:45,841 --> 00:32:48,218
but I can't type or
stand the sight of blood,

670
00:32:48,302 --> 00:32:50,846
so that ruled out
secretary for me.

671
00:32:50,929 --> 00:32:51,930
STOPPARD: Mmm.

672
00:32:57,102 --> 00:32:58,830
You don't mind if I pick
your brains, do you, sir?

673
00:32:58,854 --> 00:33:00,772
Only I have sergeants'
exams in a month,

674
00:33:00,856 --> 00:33:03,376
and I just have one or two questions
that I'd love to run by you.

675
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:04,460
- Um...
- Actually, Constable,

676
00:33:04,484 --> 00:33:06,403
I've just remembered
that I have a, uh...

677
00:33:06,653 --> 00:33:08,739
- (DOOR SHUTS)
- dentist appointment.

678
00:33:08,822 --> 00:33:11,366
Oh. Sorry, sir. I didn't
know you were suffering.

679
00:33:11,533 --> 00:33:12,701
Just a routine checkup.

680
00:33:12,784 --> 00:33:14,369
- What shall I do, sir?
- Wait here.

681
00:33:14,453 --> 00:33:16,371
But what if Woolf turns up, sir?

682
00:33:16,955 --> 00:33:19,416
Won't be long. And
you have your, uh,

683
00:33:19,499 --> 00:33:20,501
notebook.

684
00:33:23,253 --> 00:33:25,380
- Keep your eyes peeled.
- Yes, sir.

685
00:33:25,839 --> 00:33:26,840
(CLEARS THROAT)

686
00:33:33,055 --> 00:33:34,640
(SIGHS DEEPLY)

687
00:33:34,723 --> 00:33:37,142
(STEALTHY JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

688
00:33:55,619 --> 00:33:56,620
- Gin.
- BARTENDER: Gin?

689
00:33:56,703 --> 00:33:58,038
Yeah, please.

690
00:34:09,007 --> 00:34:10,676
(WHISPERS) Oh, you're joking.

691
00:34:14,096 --> 00:34:15,222
Oh, no.

692
00:34:15,973 --> 00:34:17,139
(STALKER SIGHS)

693
00:34:20,893 --> 00:34:22,353
- (PENCIL SNAPS)
- Oh, God.

694
00:34:24,063 --> 00:34:25,148
(SIGHS)

695
00:34:25,232 --> 00:34:27,650
(UP-TEMPO JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

696
00:34:40,789 --> 00:34:42,666
Follow this up with
another, please.

697
00:35:06,982 --> 00:35:08,817
{\an8}(DOORBELLS RINGING)

698
00:35:13,572 --> 00:35:15,782
(MELODIC WHISTLING)

699
00:35:17,492 --> 00:35:18,911
- (STOPS WHISTLING)
- (MUSIC STOPS)

700
00:35:24,166 --> 00:35:25,334
(STOPPARD GRUNTS)

701
00:35:25,918 --> 00:35:27,294
There you are, Constable.

702
00:35:28,879 --> 00:35:30,964
I've been looking
all over for you.

703
00:35:33,842 --> 00:35:36,136
STOPPARD: So, I gather
it was you that, uh, paid

704
00:35:36,220 --> 00:35:39,848
for Mr. Kopernick's rather
extravagant hotel suite.

705
00:35:39,932 --> 00:35:42,017
Oh, nothing unusual
in that, Inspector.

706
00:35:42,559 --> 00:35:47,189
I'm afraid a producer is expected
to indulge the whims of the talent.

707
00:35:47,272 --> 00:35:50,150
Especially when
they're American.

708
00:35:50,234 --> 00:35:53,070
But still, a pretty penny,
a room at the Savoy.

709
00:35:53,153 --> 00:35:54,238
Par for the course.

710
00:35:54,321 --> 00:35:57,574
When I was in the Congo
for <i>The African Queen,</i>

711
00:35:57,658 --> 00:36:01,078
Huston and Bogart refused
to drink the water.

712
00:36:01,787 --> 00:36:04,873
Insisted on bourbon, even to
brush their teeth. (CHUCKLES)

713
00:36:04,957 --> 00:36:07,793
Not so easy to get hold of in
the jungle, I can assure you.

714
00:36:08,335 --> 00:36:11,922
Huh. You know, Constable Stalker
here is a great admirer of that film.

715
00:36:12,005 --> 00:36:13,173
Aren't you, Constable?

716
00:36:15,634 --> 00:36:17,135
It's a marvelous film, sir.

717
00:36:17,302 --> 00:36:19,179
Why, thank you, Constable.

718
00:36:19,263 --> 00:36:21,014
(CHUCKLES DRYLY) Encyclopedia.

719
00:36:21,098 --> 00:36:22,891
Cinematic encyclopedia up there.

720
00:36:22,975 --> 00:36:24,476
- I wouldn't say that.
- Yeah.

721
00:36:24,685 --> 00:36:25,811
Right.

722
00:36:25,978 --> 00:36:27,298
- Being humble.
- (WOOLF CHUCKLES)

723
00:36:27,437 --> 00:36:28,772
I'm not.

724
00:36:28,939 --> 00:36:31,275
So, it's not true that
Kopernick had dirt on you?

725
00:36:33,902 --> 00:36:35,112
(SCOFFS)

726
00:36:37,281 --> 00:36:38,782
Who told you that?

727
00:36:38,991 --> 00:36:40,617
(DRUM INTRO MUSIC PLAYING)

728
00:36:43,829 --> 00:36:46,123
(BAND PLAYING UPBEAT MUSIC)

729
00:36:48,333 --> 00:36:49,877
(LIVELY CHATTER)

730
00:36:58,260 --> 00:36:59,803
(ANN CHUCKLING)

731
00:36:59,887 --> 00:37:02,472
Well, now, what do we have here?

732
00:37:02,556 --> 00:37:04,266
(ALL CHUCKLE POLITELY)

733
00:37:04,558 --> 00:37:06,226
Huh, Woolfie?

734
00:37:06,560 --> 00:37:08,187
Sittin' in a quiet corner,

735
00:37:08,270 --> 00:37:10,270
- all very nice and intimate.
- (ANN CLEARS THROAT)

736
00:37:10,689 --> 00:37:12,107
Hmm?

737
00:37:12,274 --> 00:37:14,568
Say, you wouldn't mind if
I joined you, would you?

738
00:37:14,651 --> 00:37:16,403
(CHUCKLES) Not at all, old boy.

739
00:37:16,486 --> 00:37:17,487
LEO: Uh-huh.

740
00:37:18,071 --> 00:37:21,408
And you must be Mrs. Woolf, huh?

741
00:37:21,491 --> 00:37:23,493
Swell to make your acquaintance.

742
00:37:23,577 --> 00:37:26,413
- (ANN MUMBLES)
- No, no. Leo, this is Ann.

743
00:37:26,496 --> 00:37:27,915
(CLEARS THROAT)
She's my assistant.

744
00:37:27,998 --> 00:37:28,999
Ah.

745
00:37:30,501 --> 00:37:31,752
Workin' late, huh?

746
00:37:33,879 --> 00:37:34,963
If you'll excuse me...

747
00:37:35,047 --> 00:37:36,673
Um, I'm sorry.

748
00:37:39,384 --> 00:37:40,719
You have a nice night, now.

749
00:37:43,764 --> 00:37:45,349
(SIGHS) Well, now.

750
00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:49,353
(TUTS) This puts
me in a tough spot.

751
00:37:49,603 --> 00:37:51,730
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

752
00:37:51,813 --> 00:37:54,274
That I'm afraid I'm gonna
have to take advantage of.

753
00:37:56,902 --> 00:37:59,613
WOOLF: <i>He asked to be put up
at the Savoy, and I agreed.</i>

754
00:38:00,489 --> 00:38:02,407
I knew it wouldn't be for long.

755
00:38:02,950 --> 00:38:05,536
That is, just until I found
the right moment to...

756
00:38:07,287 --> 00:38:08,372
tell my wife.

757
00:38:10,374 --> 00:38:12,167
I see. Well,

758
00:38:13,126 --> 00:38:15,128
we'll be in touch if
there's anything else.

759
00:38:15,879 --> 00:38:17,005
Uh...

760
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:19,174
Constable.

761
00:38:19,550 --> 00:38:20,634
Shall we?

762
00:38:28,350 --> 00:38:31,937
But, sir, Woolf killed Kopernick
to hush up the affair. Case closed.

763
00:38:32,020 --> 00:38:33,313
I think if that was the case,

764
00:38:33,397 --> 00:38:35,157
he wouldn't have
volunteered the information.

765
00:38:36,191 --> 00:38:38,318
So, then he's in the clear?

766
00:38:38,402 --> 00:38:39,403
No, not necessarily.

767
00:38:39,486 --> 00:38:41,806
He might have killed Kopernick
for another reason entirely.

768
00:38:42,447 --> 00:38:44,616
STALKER: (SIGHS) I tell you,

769
00:38:45,075 --> 00:38:47,828
I'll never get the hang of this
in time for sergeants' exams.

770
00:38:48,620 --> 00:38:51,039
- (KEYS RATTLING)
- (STOPPARD SIGHS DEEPLY)

771
00:38:53,917 --> 00:38:55,169
Constable, about earlier.

772
00:38:55,252 --> 00:38:57,880
I know it looked like I'd
just come out of the pub.

773
00:38:57,963 --> 00:38:59,882
You had just come
out of the pub.

774
00:38:59,965 --> 00:39:01,508
That's right.

775
00:39:01,592 --> 00:39:03,010
But I'd only gone in there

776
00:39:03,093 --> 00:39:04,761
to get rid of the
taste of the mouthwash.

777
00:39:04,845 --> 00:39:06,597
So you had a gin, sir.

778
00:39:07,973 --> 00:39:09,933
It's an antiseptic.
I had a filling.

779
00:39:10,017 --> 00:39:11,977
I thought you said it
was a routine checkup.

780
00:39:13,770 --> 00:39:17,024
I see we've read the chapter
on interrogation techniques.

781
00:39:17,649 --> 00:39:19,401
(SIGHS) Sir,

782
00:39:19,651 --> 00:39:22,112
I know I haven't done
anything yet to impress you

783
00:39:22,196 --> 00:39:25,616
or to inspire any
confidence, and...

784
00:39:26,742 --> 00:39:28,911
I know you'd probably rather
that I wasn't on the case.

785
00:39:28,994 --> 00:39:32,289
But I didn't ask to be put
on this case either, sir.

786
00:39:32,372 --> 00:39:36,835
I was nervous, and I still am, and
I'm probably trying a bit too hard.

787
00:39:36,919 --> 00:39:39,421
But, you know, even
if I do make mistakes

788
00:39:39,505 --> 00:39:40,839
or if I jump to conclusions

789
00:39:40,923 --> 00:39:43,800
or talk a little bit too
much, that has been said,

790
00:39:43,884 --> 00:39:47,971
I just want you to know
that you can trust me.

791
00:39:48,972 --> 00:39:49,973
Sir.

792
00:39:53,977 --> 00:39:56,688
Okay. Good. Um...

793
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:01,485
(ENGINE STARTS)

794
00:40:02,402 --> 00:40:04,821
(SLOW-TEMPO ROCK SONG PLAYING)

795
00:40:50,075 --> 00:40:51,076
(SWITCH CLICKS)

796
00:40:59,710 --> 00:41:01,920
- (MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY)
- (ALARM RINGING)

797
00:41:04,965 --> 00:41:05,966
(ALARM STOPS RINGING)

798
00:41:06,508 --> 00:41:07,593
(STOPPARD GROANS)

799
00:41:17,186 --> 00:41:19,354
- (WHISPERS) Oh, you're joking.
- (CAR DOOR CLOSES)

800
00:41:20,272 --> 00:41:22,232
- Constable.
- Commissioner.

801
00:41:22,399 --> 00:41:23,400
Stoppard about?

802
00:41:23,650 --> 00:41:25,694
Er, no, sir. He's not yet
made it in this morning.

803
00:41:25,777 --> 00:41:26,987
It's almost eleven o'clock.

804
00:41:27,196 --> 00:41:29,781
He, uh... He had a
dentist appointment, sir.

805
00:41:29,865 --> 00:41:31,575
A filling, I think
he said it was.

806
00:41:31,658 --> 00:41:32,719
A molar, it might have been?

807
00:41:32,743 --> 00:41:35,454
I have been summoned
to the Home Secretary.

808
00:41:35,621 --> 00:41:36,914
He wants a debrief.

809
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:38,498
I said I had good news.

810
00:41:43,128 --> 00:41:44,296
(COMMISSIONER SIGHS)

811
00:41:45,714 --> 00:41:48,383
- Have you seen the play, sir?
- Huh?

812
00:41:49,551 --> 00:41:51,220
Oh. Yes.

813
00:41:51,386 --> 00:41:53,305
I'm afraid I took the
wife for her birthday.

814
00:41:53,430 --> 00:41:54,431
Oh.

815
00:41:54,556 --> 00:41:56,159
Of course, it didn't
fool me for a moment.

816
00:41:56,183 --> 00:41:57,392
I knew who did it right away.

817
00:41:58,477 --> 00:42:01,104
- (CHUCKLES)
- She was baffled, though.

818
00:42:01,271 --> 00:42:03,649
Even after the chap
explained everything.

819
00:42:03,815 --> 00:42:06,944
It was a trying night
for all concerned.

820
00:42:07,194 --> 00:42:08,362
STALKER: Mmm.

821
00:42:08,445 --> 00:42:09,738
I'll stick to flowers in future.

822
00:42:09,947 --> 00:42:11,740
Yes, always a safe bet, sir.

823
00:42:11,823 --> 00:42:13,700
- (TIRES SCREECH)
- (CAR BUMPS)

824
00:42:14,451 --> 00:42:15,494
STOPPARD: Sorry.

825
00:42:15,661 --> 00:42:16,662
Police.

826
00:42:16,828 --> 00:42:18,705
MAN: Please try to
be more careful, sir.

827
00:42:20,582 --> 00:42:21,959
(STOPPARD CLEARS THROAT)

828
00:42:26,380 --> 00:42:27,756
STOPPARD: Good morning.

829
00:42:28,507 --> 00:42:30,147
- Commissioner.
- COMMISSIONER: Inspector.

830
00:42:31,927 --> 00:42:33,303
Is it wise to eat so many mints?

831
00:42:33,387 --> 00:42:34,627
STOPPARD: How do you mean, sir?

832
00:42:34,972 --> 00:42:38,058
Well, haven't you just
been to the dentist?

833
00:42:40,102 --> 00:42:41,311
Yes, that's right, sir.

834
00:42:41,395 --> 00:42:42,896
Yeah. It was just a checkup.

835
00:42:45,107 --> 00:42:47,276
Although I did have
a filling as well.

836
00:42:48,068 --> 00:42:49,528
Since I was there.

837
00:42:49,987 --> 00:42:51,747
I've come down here for
an update, Inspector.

838
00:42:51,780 --> 00:42:53,198
We have good news, sir.

839
00:42:53,282 --> 00:42:54,658
COMMISSIONER AND
STOPPARD: We do?

840
00:42:54,741 --> 00:42:56,719
Yes, sir. Isn't that what
you told the Home Secretary?

841
00:42:56,743 --> 00:42:59,162
Yes, that's what I
told the Home Secretary

842
00:42:59,246 --> 00:43:00,789
on the telephone.

843
00:43:00,873 --> 00:43:02,457
I came down here to get it.

844
00:43:03,584 --> 00:43:05,210
So we don't have good news?

845
00:43:05,294 --> 00:43:06,420
We do have a witness, sir.

846
00:43:06,587 --> 00:43:07,713
- To the murder?
- (CHUCKLES)

847
00:43:07,796 --> 00:43:09,965
Yeah, that would be nice,
wouldn't it? (CHUCKLES)

848
00:43:10,048 --> 00:43:12,551
Um, no. One of the ushers
saw a suspicious character.

849
00:43:13,135 --> 00:43:14,720
He's waiting for us inside.

850
00:43:15,512 --> 00:43:16,889
Very well.

851
00:43:17,055 --> 00:43:20,267
I'll tell the Home Secretary
we have a promising lead.

852
00:43:20,434 --> 00:43:22,853
And I'll rely on you not
to make a liar out of me.

853
00:43:23,812 --> 00:43:25,272
- Constable.
- Commissioner.

854
00:43:25,439 --> 00:43:26,732
Inspector.

855
00:43:27,107 --> 00:43:28,108
Commissioner.

856
00:43:30,736 --> 00:43:31,737
Constable.

857
00:43:31,904 --> 00:43:32,905
Inspector.

858
00:43:36,283 --> 00:43:37,868
STOPPARD: <i>So, Dennis, um,</i>

859
00:43:38,035 --> 00:43:40,162
I understand that you saw
something the other night.

860
00:43:40,329 --> 00:43:42,206
- Yeah.
- What'd you see?

861
00:43:42,372 --> 00:43:45,167
Well, I'd gone to get a bottle
of Scotch for the dead man.

862
00:43:45,250 --> 00:43:49,254
Um... This was before,
you know, he died.

863
00:43:49,338 --> 00:43:50,881
- Um...
- And then you came back,

864
00:43:50,964 --> 00:43:52,884
and that's when you saw
the suspicious character?

865
00:43:52,925 --> 00:43:53,926
Exactly.

866
00:43:54,092 --> 00:43:56,053
Well, sort of.

867
00:43:56,220 --> 00:43:58,889
I didn't get a very good
look, if I'm honest.

868
00:43:59,056 --> 00:44:02,434
He had on, like, a
darkish overcoat.

869
00:44:02,601 --> 00:44:04,686
I see. Anything else?

870
00:44:05,145 --> 00:44:06,230
(INHALES SHARPLY)

871
00:44:06,522 --> 00:44:08,607
A pair of trousers.

872
00:44:08,857 --> 00:44:10,526
And a hat.

873
00:44:10,692 --> 00:44:12,486
It was on his head.

874
00:44:13,237 --> 00:44:14,738
Right. Yeah.

875
00:44:14,947 --> 00:44:17,407
Yeah. A soft, felt hat.

876
00:44:17,741 --> 00:44:18,951
STALKER: Mmm-hmm.

877
00:44:19,034 --> 00:44:20,386
What about a
physical description?

878
00:44:20,410 --> 00:44:23,163
Was he a tall man?
Short? Thick set?

879
00:44:23,372 --> 00:44:25,415
Oh... Just average, I'd say.

880
00:44:25,582 --> 00:44:27,584
STOPPARD: Average
height or average build?

881
00:44:27,876 --> 00:44:29,127
Um...

882
00:44:29,711 --> 00:44:30,921
Both?

883
00:44:31,797 --> 00:44:32,923
No, don't ask me.

884
00:44:33,090 --> 00:44:35,092
I don't know. I'm asking you.

885
00:44:36,635 --> 00:44:38,136
Average height,

886
00:44:39,054 --> 00:44:40,180
medium build.

887
00:44:40,389 --> 00:44:42,432
Would you say like
the Inspector?

888
00:44:42,516 --> 00:44:43,600
DENNIS: Yeah.

889
00:44:43,684 --> 00:44:44,977
Suppose so. Pretty much.

890
00:44:45,060 --> 00:44:47,604
So what did he do that
made you suspicious?

891
00:44:48,438 --> 00:44:50,524
It wasn't so much what he did,

892
00:44:50,607 --> 00:44:53,569
it was more, you know,
the way he did it.

893
00:44:54,528 --> 00:44:56,196
Right. How'd he do it?

894
00:44:56,613 --> 00:44:58,866
Well, sort of...

895
00:44:59,992 --> 00:45:01,451
suspiciously.

896
00:45:05,706 --> 00:45:07,207
This has been great.

897
00:45:07,791 --> 00:45:09,126
Off you go.

898
00:45:10,043 --> 00:45:11,295
- Thank you.
- Thank you.

899
00:45:11,378 --> 00:45:12,379
Thank you.

900
00:45:14,214 --> 00:45:15,215
That was good.

901
00:45:15,382 --> 00:45:17,801
Do you think that went well?

902
00:45:19,261 --> 00:45:20,738
STOPPARD: I think it's
time we talk to that actor

903
00:45:20,762 --> 00:45:21,823
who had a fight with Kopernick.

904
00:45:21,847 --> 00:45:23,223
STALKER: Mr. Attenborough, sir?

905
00:45:23,307 --> 00:45:25,309
STOPPARD: That's the
one. Famous, is he?

906
00:45:25,475 --> 00:45:28,478
You're pulling my leg, sir.
You've never heard of Dickie?

907
00:45:28,562 --> 00:45:29,813
Richard Attenborough?

908
00:45:29,897 --> 00:45:32,649
Pinkie Brown? <i>Brighton
Rock?</i> You must have.

909
00:45:32,733 --> 00:45:34,502
(MIMICKING DICKIE) "You wanted
a recording of my voice.

910
00:45:34,526 --> 00:45:35,527
"Well, here it is.

911
00:45:35,611 --> 00:45:37,213
"What you want me to
say is 'I love you.'"

912
00:45:37,237 --> 00:45:40,532
Keep in mind that we're
here to conduct an interview

913
00:45:40,616 --> 00:45:41,801
as part of a murder
investigation,

914
00:45:41,825 --> 00:45:44,536
not an article for <i>Sight
& Sound</i> magazine, yes?

915
00:45:44,745 --> 00:45:45,746
Yes, sir.

916
00:45:47,164 --> 00:45:48,916
- (KNOCKING)
- DICKIE: Come in, darling.

917
00:45:51,376 --> 00:45:52,794
Inspector Stoppard.

918
00:45:52,961 --> 00:45:55,839
I say, a real-life detective.

919
00:45:56,006 --> 00:45:57,966
Scotland Yard and everything.

920
00:45:58,133 --> 00:45:59,218
And you are?

921
00:45:59,676 --> 00:46:00,969
(CHUCKLES)

922
00:46:03,347 --> 00:46:05,265
- This is...
- (SIGHS IN AWE)

923
00:46:05,432 --> 00:46:07,112
- Constable Stalker.
- (WHISPERS) Stalker.

924
00:46:07,351 --> 00:46:08,352
(STOPPARD GRUNTS)

925
00:46:09,061 --> 00:46:11,021
Oh, I like the way you did that.

926
00:46:11,230 --> 00:46:12,231
Very natural.

927
00:46:12,898 --> 00:46:16,193
I hope you don't mind, sir,
but I just want to say bravo.

928
00:46:16,276 --> 00:46:19,446
- And, uh, encore. (CHUCKLING)
- DICKIE: Oh.

929
00:46:19,530 --> 00:46:20,590
All right, thank you, Constable.

930
00:46:20,614 --> 00:46:21,865
Yes, thank you, Constable.

931
00:46:21,949 --> 00:46:23,408
Are you a lover of theater?

932
00:46:23,492 --> 00:46:24,868
I can get you
tickets if you like.

933
00:46:26,119 --> 00:46:28,163
I would like, sir.
Yes. Very much.

934
00:46:29,039 --> 00:46:31,320
DICKIE: It would be good to
get a professional take on it.

935
00:46:31,375 --> 00:46:32,435
STALKER: Mmm-hmm.
DICKIE: Yeah.

936
00:46:32,459 --> 00:46:33,794
I have so many questions.

937
00:46:33,961 --> 00:46:35,337
I have one or two of my own.

938
00:46:35,671 --> 00:46:37,339
I dare say that you do.

939
00:46:38,257 --> 00:46:42,970
I understand that you and, uh, Kopernick
came to blows the night in question.

940
00:46:43,136 --> 00:46:45,889
Was there a particular
reason for the ill feeling?

941
00:46:45,973 --> 00:46:48,725
Tell me, Inspector, did you
get your limp during the war?

942
00:46:51,562 --> 00:46:52,563
It's very slight.

943
00:46:52,646 --> 00:46:54,064
I noticed it the other night

944
00:46:54,147 --> 00:46:56,316
when you were on
stage. I, um... (TUTS)

945
00:46:56,400 --> 00:46:59,069
Well, I thought I might
borrow it, if you don't mind.

946
00:46:59,152 --> 00:47:02,447
It's always good for the lead
character to have a physical defect.

947
00:47:02,531 --> 00:47:05,117
Speaks to a troubled soul.

948
00:47:05,617 --> 00:47:08,704
It was me, Inspector.
You need look no further.

949
00:47:08,871 --> 00:47:09,872
I arrest you

950
00:47:09,955 --> 00:47:11,224
- for the murder of Leo...
- No, no, no.

951
00:47:11,248 --> 00:47:12,457
No. Not yet.

952
00:47:12,541 --> 00:47:13,709
STALKER: Oh. Sorry, sir.

953
00:47:13,792 --> 00:47:16,628
I was the particular
reason for the ill feeling.

954
00:47:16,712 --> 00:47:19,298
Yes, well, Leo had his
eye on Sheila, you see.

955
00:47:19,381 --> 00:47:20,382
And I took exception.

956
00:47:20,465 --> 00:47:22,301
He was a real hound, Inspector.

957
00:47:23,218 --> 00:47:25,429
(DRAMATIC MUSIC INTRO PLAYING)

958
00:47:26,138 --> 00:47:27,848
LEO: Come on, play nice.

959
00:47:28,056 --> 00:47:29,057
Maybe I can help you.

960
00:47:29,892 --> 00:47:30,934
Help me?

961
00:47:31,101 --> 00:47:32,102
To do what?

962
00:47:32,728 --> 00:47:35,063
Bag the lead role in the
film of <i>The Mousetrap.</i>

963
00:47:36,648 --> 00:47:37,900
Top billing.

964
00:47:37,983 --> 00:47:39,026
Make you a star.

965
00:47:39,109 --> 00:47:41,528
But I have bagged the lead role.

966
00:47:41,612 --> 00:47:43,155
Yeah, who told
you that, Woolfie?

967
00:47:43,238 --> 00:47:44,990
He is the producer.

968
00:47:45,073 --> 00:47:46,575
Honey, he just cuts the checks.

969
00:47:46,950 --> 00:47:47,993
I'm the director.

970
00:47:48,243 --> 00:47:50,704
Without me, there is no
movie. You understand?

971
00:47:50,787 --> 00:47:52,581
You got a problem, buddy?

972
00:47:53,999 --> 00:47:55,876
Keep the change. And the glass.

973
00:47:56,210 --> 00:47:58,587
And the studio, don't
they have a say in it?

974
00:47:58,754 --> 00:48:01,965
Rumor is they want to
put a name in the picture

975
00:48:02,049 --> 00:48:04,009
that people have heard of.

976
00:48:04,510 --> 00:48:06,720
Bona fide Hollywood star.

977
00:48:06,970 --> 00:48:09,556
They like Grace Kelly.
You ever heard of her?

978
00:48:13,185 --> 00:48:14,478
Don't worry.

979
00:48:15,479 --> 00:48:17,022
They can be talked round.

980
00:48:18,190 --> 00:48:21,443
I've got a very,
uh, silver tongue.

981
00:48:22,277 --> 00:48:24,363
(MUSIC BUILDS UP)

982
00:48:24,446 --> 00:48:26,573
- (DICKIE GRUNTS)
- (GUESTS EXCLAIM)

983
00:48:26,657 --> 00:48:27,800
SHEILA: <i>I won't lie, Inspector.</i>

984
00:48:27,824 --> 00:48:29,785
I was not entirely sorry
to learn of his demise,

985
00:48:29,868 --> 00:48:31,495
but I had no part in it.

986
00:48:31,912 --> 00:48:34,307
Much like the film adaptation
of <i>The Mousetrap,</i> it would seem.

987
00:48:34,331 --> 00:48:35,892
Oh, come now, darling,
you don't know that.

988
00:48:35,916 --> 00:48:37,835
Woolf promised you the role.

989
00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:40,045
He's a man of his
word. He went to Eton.

990
00:48:40,128 --> 00:48:41,713
(SCOFFS) Wake up, Dickie.

991
00:48:41,797 --> 00:48:43,775
He's a man of whatever word
will get his film made.

992
00:48:43,799 --> 00:48:47,553
And that contract business with
Choo is coming apart at the seams.

993
00:48:47,636 --> 00:48:49,096
- Choo?
- Bless you, sir.

994
00:48:49,263 --> 00:48:51,390
No, as in Petula Spencer.

995
00:48:51,723 --> 00:48:53,809
She sold Woolf the film rights.

996
00:48:53,976 --> 00:48:55,561
Well, about those tickets.

997
00:48:55,644 --> 00:48:57,080
Is there a day that
suits you better?

998
00:48:57,104 --> 00:48:59,857
Uh, I'm generally free on
Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

999
00:49:00,023 --> 00:49:01,024
And Thursdays.

1000
00:49:01,108 --> 00:49:03,068
Well, thank you, sir.
Thank you, madam.

1001
00:49:03,151 --> 00:49:04,921
No, no, not at all. We'll
be sure to let you know

1002
00:49:04,945 --> 00:49:06,738
if anything else
springs to mind.

1003
00:49:06,822 --> 00:49:09,575
I'm sure it's always
the insignificant detail

1004
00:49:09,658 --> 00:49:11,702
that catches the
killer in the end.

1005
00:49:11,785 --> 00:49:12,911
Isn't that so, Inspector?

1006
00:49:16,540 --> 00:49:20,210
I don't usually have a
lot on on weekends either.

1007
00:49:20,377 --> 00:49:22,880
Or Mondays. For the...
For the tickets.

1008
00:49:22,963 --> 00:49:24,065
- STOPPARD: Constable.
- Sir.

1009
00:49:24,089 --> 00:49:25,090
Right.

1010
00:49:25,174 --> 00:49:27,342
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

1011
00:49:28,177 --> 00:49:29,845
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

1012
00:49:34,057 --> 00:49:35,726
(DOG WHIMPERING)

1013
00:49:59,374 --> 00:50:00,667
She'll see you now.

1014
00:50:02,294 --> 00:50:04,379
STOPPARD: So, you
own this theater?

1015
00:50:04,463 --> 00:50:06,423
Yes. Humble beginnings.

1016
00:50:06,507 --> 00:50:07,758
(RAGTIME PIANO MUSIC PLAYING)

1017
00:50:07,841 --> 00:50:09,176
You'll have to excuse Mother.

1018
00:50:09,259 --> 00:50:11,762
She's not been herself
since Father died,

1019
00:50:11,845 --> 00:50:13,430
in the first Great War.

1020
00:50:14,014 --> 00:50:16,141
It's been a long 30 years.

1021
00:50:16,600 --> 00:50:18,060
It's nice that you
gave her a job.

1022
00:50:18,519 --> 00:50:20,604
Well, how else is she
gonna pay the rent?

1023
00:50:21,063 --> 00:50:23,143
I let her have the spare
room at a discount as it is.

1024
00:50:23,857 --> 00:50:25,943
Yes, no. You can stop there.

1025
00:50:26,193 --> 00:50:28,862
- We get the idea. Bravo.
- (PIANO MUSIC STOPS)

1026
00:50:29,279 --> 00:50:30,989
I understand that
you handled the sale

1027
00:50:31,073 --> 00:50:33,075
of <i>The Mousetrap</i> film
rights to John Woolf?

1028
00:50:33,283 --> 00:50:35,744
Yes, that's right.
I did. Wait... Why?

1029
00:50:36,662 --> 00:50:37,829
What's he been saying?

1030
00:50:38,664 --> 00:50:40,165
Oh, he's such a crybaby.

1031
00:50:41,208 --> 00:50:44,169
Honestly, he acts as though
I put a gun to his head.

1032
00:50:44,253 --> 00:50:45,921
(SUSPENSEFUL NOTE PLAYS)

1033
00:50:46,004 --> 00:50:47,005
(POPS)

1034
00:50:47,089 --> 00:50:48,298
ANN AND PETULA: Oh! (LAUGHING)

1035
00:50:48,382 --> 00:50:50,175
Hang on a minute.
Is this important?

1036
00:50:50,342 --> 00:50:51,844
I doubt it. What does it say?

1037
00:50:51,927 --> 00:50:54,388
"No motion picture based on
the stage play <i>The Mousetrap</i>

1038
00:50:54,471 --> 00:50:55,806
"is to enter into production

1039
00:50:55,889 --> 00:50:57,933
"until a minimum of
six months have elapsed

1040
00:50:58,016 --> 00:50:59,977
"since the end of its
first theatrical run."

1041
00:51:00,060 --> 00:51:01,900
PETULA: Oh, you don't
need to worry about that.

1042
00:51:01,937 --> 00:51:02,938
It's a whodunit.

1043
00:51:03,021 --> 00:51:04,374
As soon as word gets
out who did do it,

1044
00:51:04,398 --> 00:51:06,024
audiences are bound to drop off.

1045
00:51:06,108 --> 00:51:09,903
Come on, sign on the dotted
line, and I'll make a toast.

1046
00:51:09,987 --> 00:51:11,280
(ANN AND PETULA CHUCKLE)

1047
00:51:14,241 --> 00:51:18,537
Ann, darling, the next contract I
sign will be our marriage certificate.

1048
00:51:18,620 --> 00:51:21,206
- (ANN CHUCKLES)
- Well, first it'll be the divorce papers.

1049
00:51:21,290 --> 00:51:23,458
But then our
marriage certificate.

1050
00:51:25,460 --> 00:51:27,337
- (ANN YELPS)
- Edana, darling.

1051
00:51:28,380 --> 00:51:29,381
What a pleasant surprise.

1052
00:51:29,464 --> 00:51:31,925
- You know Choo and, uh...
- PETULA: Mmm-hmm.

1053
00:51:32,009 --> 00:51:33,177
- Ann.
- I do.

1054
00:51:33,260 --> 00:51:35,071
Dear girl, what on Earth
are you doing down there?

1055
00:51:35,095 --> 00:51:37,472
I just fell over. Excuse me.

1056
00:51:38,348 --> 00:51:41,185
Honestly, it's like having
Buster Keaton for an assistant.

1057
00:51:41,268 --> 00:51:42,936
Now, I've just come
from Madame Zena...

1058
00:51:43,020 --> 00:51:44,998
Oh, darling, I really wish
you wouldn't see that...

1059
00:51:45,022 --> 00:51:46,207
Please don't call
her a charlatan.

1060
00:51:46,231 --> 00:51:47,431
I was going to say "crackpot."

1061
00:51:51,361 --> 00:51:53,071
- What's this?
- EDANA: It's a Tarot card.

1062
00:51:53,363 --> 00:51:55,032
I can see that.
What does it mean?

1063
00:51:55,782 --> 00:51:56,783
Betrayal.

1064
00:51:56,867 --> 00:51:58,869
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1065
00:52:02,706 --> 00:52:03,790
Ooh.

1066
00:52:03,874 --> 00:52:06,376
Betrayal as in his
affair, not the contract.

1067
00:52:06,460 --> 00:52:08,462
That was above board.
Is above board.

1068
00:52:08,837 --> 00:52:11,298
Agatha insisted on
that clause, not me.

1069
00:52:11,381 --> 00:52:14,801
No, she's fiercely protective of
her own work, you see, because...

1070
00:52:14,885 --> 00:52:16,428
Well, she has to be.

1071
00:52:16,803 --> 00:52:18,555
People get so riled up.

1072
00:52:18,722 --> 00:52:20,390
She's had death
threats, you know.

1073
00:52:20,557 --> 00:52:23,519
Poor girl can't write so
much as a letter to <i>The Times</i>

1074
00:52:23,602 --> 00:52:25,270
without a deluge of legal action

1075
00:52:25,354 --> 00:52:28,607
and spurious claims she stole
this plot or that character.

1076
00:52:28,899 --> 00:52:30,734
Isn't that what
happened here, though?

1077
00:52:30,817 --> 00:52:33,320
Isn't <i>The Mousetrap</i>
based on a true story?

1078
00:52:34,363 --> 00:52:37,699
Yes. Well, originally.
I mean, tangentially.

1079
00:52:38,242 --> 00:52:39,701
In any case, that's the reason

1080
00:52:39,785 --> 00:52:42,829
Woolf was so keen to shut
the theater the other night.

1081
00:52:42,996 --> 00:52:44,331
He can't make his film

1082
00:52:44,414 --> 00:52:47,000
until the play ends its
run in the West End.

1083
00:52:47,167 --> 00:52:50,295
As it is, what with the play
being such a phenomenal success,

1084
00:52:50,462 --> 00:52:53,215
he's stuck in
theatrical purgatory.

1085
00:52:53,507 --> 00:52:54,508
STALKER: Mmm-hmm.

1086
00:52:54,591 --> 00:52:56,218
He's a ruthless
customer, is Woolf.

1087
00:52:57,135 --> 00:52:59,721
He'll stop at nothing
to get his film made.

1088
00:53:05,936 --> 00:53:07,437
STALKER: <i>It's
definitely Woolf, sir.</i>

1089
00:53:08,272 --> 00:53:10,399
Well, not 100%.

1090
00:53:10,482 --> 00:53:14,069
More like 73-74%, I'd say.

1091
00:53:14,862 --> 00:53:18,490
He killed Kopernick in the
theater to force it to close down

1092
00:53:18,657 --> 00:53:20,367
so that he could make his film.

1093
00:53:20,534 --> 00:53:22,452
He could marry his mistress.

1094
00:53:22,619 --> 00:53:24,413
And then he could get
shot of a blackmailer.

1095
00:53:24,496 --> 00:53:26,206
It's not Woolf.
It's too elaborate.

1096
00:53:26,290 --> 00:53:28,292
Burn the place down, if
that's what you want.

1097
00:53:28,375 --> 00:53:30,794
Besides, doesn't he need
a director to make a film?

1098
00:53:31,753 --> 00:53:33,273
Well, then it's back
to Cocker-Norris.

1099
00:53:33,338 --> 00:53:34,673
Process of elimination.

1100
00:53:35,465 --> 00:53:36,842
No, it's not Mervyn.

1101
00:53:36,925 --> 00:53:38,760
Yeah, but the tongue business.

1102
00:53:39,553 --> 00:53:41,471
And he clearly didn't
like Leo, did he?

1103
00:53:44,349 --> 00:53:46,029
People don't rip out
other people's tongues

1104
00:53:46,101 --> 00:53:47,370
because of creative differences.

1105
00:53:47,394 --> 00:53:48,896
They do it out of revenge

1106
00:53:49,897 --> 00:53:51,565
or rage because they've
lost a loved one.

1107
00:53:51,648 --> 00:53:52,792
They can't forgive or forget,

1108
00:53:52,816 --> 00:53:55,277
so they just stew and
fester alone in the dark

1109
00:53:55,360 --> 00:53:59,198
until finally it all comes out in
a sudden, frenzied act of violence.

1110
00:54:04,703 --> 00:54:07,664
How did you get the limp, sir?
If you don't mind me asking.

1111
00:54:08,040 --> 00:54:11,043
Uh, in the war. Got shot
in the Italian Alps.

1112
00:54:11,126 --> 00:54:12,127
STALKER: Hmm.

1113
00:54:13,670 --> 00:54:14,880
Sounds painful.

1114
00:54:16,340 --> 00:54:18,342
What do you... (LAUGHS)

1115
00:54:18,425 --> 00:54:20,719
(CHUCKLES) Sorry, sir.

1116
00:54:20,802 --> 00:54:22,971
No, that's very funny.

1117
00:54:24,681 --> 00:54:26,934
Is there a Mr. Stalker, Stalker?

1118
00:54:27,518 --> 00:54:29,811
Uh, I'm afraid he
died in the war, sir.

1119
00:54:31,730 --> 00:54:32,731
Children?

1120
00:54:32,898 --> 00:54:33,899
A boy and a girl.

1121
00:54:34,399 --> 00:54:36,026
- Can't be easy.
- (CHUCKLES)

1122
00:54:36,527 --> 00:54:39,196
What about you? Do you
have any family, sir?

1123
00:54:39,279 --> 00:54:41,949
(SMACKS LIPS) Uh,
I came close, once.

1124
00:54:42,032 --> 00:54:43,825
Yeah, I had an unfaithful wife.

1125
00:54:43,909 --> 00:54:44,910
Oh.

1126
00:54:45,702 --> 00:54:48,789
She was eight months pregnant when
she told me I wasn't the father.

1127
00:54:50,666 --> 00:54:52,751
I'd made a cot and everything.

1128
00:54:53,877 --> 00:54:56,088
That's awful, sir. I'm sorry.

1129
00:54:57,297 --> 00:54:58,507
(GRUNTS DISMISSIVELY)

1130
00:54:59,383 --> 00:55:01,134
- Landlord.
- LANDLORD: Yes, sir?

1131
00:55:01,218 --> 00:55:02,219
Another round.

1132
00:55:02,594 --> 00:55:03,595
Oh, I don't know.

1133
00:55:03,679 --> 00:55:05,889
Should we maybe get going, sir?

1134
00:55:05,973 --> 00:55:07,432
Got work tomorrow. (CHUCKLES)

1135
00:55:07,516 --> 00:55:10,102
- (MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
- (DOOR OPENS)

1136
00:55:10,185 --> 00:55:12,813
LANDLORD: Go on, steer off
before I call the police!

1137
00:55:12,896 --> 00:55:13,897
(STALKER GRUNTS)

1138
00:55:14,773 --> 00:55:16,441
STALKER: Sorry again. Thank you.

1139
00:55:17,317 --> 00:55:19,236
Are you sure you're all
right to drive, sir?

1140
00:55:19,319 --> 00:55:20,445
STOPPARD: Absolutely.

1141
00:55:20,529 --> 00:55:21,530
STALKER: Oh!

1142
00:55:21,613 --> 00:55:23,699
STOPPARD: I could run
you home if you like.

1143
00:55:24,700 --> 00:55:27,286
(MELLOW MUSIC CONTINUES)

1144
00:55:37,713 --> 00:55:40,757
STALKER: Now. Just
gonna pop you there.

1145
00:55:41,675 --> 00:55:43,552
(SLURRING) I can take
it from here, Constable.

1146
00:55:47,222 --> 00:55:48,515
Oh.

1147
00:55:48,599 --> 00:55:49,600
Sir.

1148
00:55:56,231 --> 00:55:57,232
There we go.

1149
00:56:02,613 --> 00:56:04,156
(PANTING)

1150
00:56:08,827 --> 00:56:10,913
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1151
00:56:40,651 --> 00:56:41,818
(SWITCH CLICKS)

1152
00:56:48,492 --> 00:56:50,953
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES)

1153
00:56:56,041 --> 00:56:58,043
(MUSIC INTENSIFYING)

1154
00:57:06,927 --> 00:57:07,970
(MUSIC FADES)

1155
00:57:13,350 --> 00:57:14,518
STALKER: Morning, sir.

1156
00:57:15,644 --> 00:57:16,645
What do you want?

1157
00:57:17,437 --> 00:57:20,774
Uh, the other night,
sir. The dead Yank.

1158
00:57:20,941 --> 00:57:23,986
Inspector Stoppard got the call
and not Leeke or Priestley.

1159
00:57:24,903 --> 00:57:25,904
So?

1160
00:57:32,244 --> 00:57:34,246
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1161
00:57:35,664 --> 00:57:37,916
Leeke was in Skegness
on his honeymoon,

1162
00:57:38,000 --> 00:57:40,043
and Priestley took the
Rillington Place call.

1163
00:57:42,296 --> 00:57:43,297
What time?

1164
00:57:44,923 --> 00:57:48,051
Half-past 11:00. <i>Book
at Bedtime</i> was on.

1165
00:57:53,891 --> 00:57:56,268
Did you ever meet
Stoppard's wife, sir?

1166
00:57:57,060 --> 00:57:58,145
I did.

1167
00:57:58,228 --> 00:58:00,105
You don't happen to
remember her name, do you?

1168
00:58:07,279 --> 00:58:08,405
It was...

1169
00:58:10,490 --> 00:58:12,159
Mrs. Stoppard.

1170
00:58:14,870 --> 00:58:15,871
Brilliant.

1171
00:58:21,126 --> 00:58:23,128
(ROUSING MUSIC PLAYING)

1172
00:58:33,388 --> 00:58:34,932
Hello, is this Abigale?

1173
00:58:37,059 --> 00:58:38,185
Hello, is this Beryl?

1174
00:58:38,352 --> 00:58:40,479
I am a friend of
Leo Kopernick's.

1175
00:58:40,562 --> 00:58:41,897
(LINE DISCONNECTS)

1176
00:58:41,980 --> 00:58:42,981
Beryl?

1177
00:58:44,608 --> 00:58:46,485
Is Geraldine there
by any chance?

1178
00:58:47,486 --> 00:58:48,570
(SIGHS)

1179
00:59:13,846 --> 00:59:15,326
STOPPARD: Oh,
Constable. STALKER: Sir.

1180
00:59:15,848 --> 00:59:18,183
Did Dickie ever come through
on those theater tickets?

1181
00:59:18,267 --> 00:59:20,978
I thought of going, and, uh...
Maybe the play's the thing

1182
00:59:21,728 --> 00:59:24,940
Ties this all together.
Would you like to tag along?

1183
00:59:25,274 --> 00:59:26,692
- Yes, sir. Um...
- (DOOR OPENS)

1184
00:59:28,777 --> 00:59:29,778
What is it, Constable?

1185
00:59:30,320 --> 00:59:31,989
- Uh, nothing, sir.
- Oh.

1186
00:59:32,906 --> 00:59:35,158
Do you, um, want a cup of tea?

1187
00:59:35,826 --> 00:59:37,995
(SIGHS) Listen to me, Stalker.

1188
00:59:38,537 --> 00:59:42,457
No one is ever going to take you
seriously as a police officer

1189
00:59:42,541 --> 00:59:44,221
if you act like a
tea-lady, do you hear me?

1190
00:59:44,251 --> 00:59:45,711
Yes, sir. Thank
you, sir. (CHUCKLES)

1191
00:59:45,794 --> 00:59:47,296
Milk and two sugars.

1192
00:59:51,800 --> 00:59:52,801
Commissioner.

1193
00:59:52,885 --> 00:59:55,971
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1194
01:00:00,392 --> 01:00:01,727
I said, "Who do you want?

1195
01:00:01,810 --> 01:00:04,563
"Agatha Christie or
Mervyn Cocker-Norris?

1196
01:00:04,646 --> 01:00:07,441
"Anyone can do her,
but only I can do me."

1197
01:00:07,524 --> 01:00:09,735
GIO: <i>Stronzo.</i>
(MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY)

1198
01:00:09,818 --> 01:00:13,488
MERVYN: <i>The Mousetrap</i> in
the house style, as it were.

1199
01:00:13,572 --> 01:00:15,282
I'll take the bare
bones of the story,

1200
01:00:15,365 --> 01:00:19,203
a rather mundane tale of child
abuse, and make it my own.

1201
01:00:23,081 --> 01:00:24,082
Here we are.

1202
01:00:24,708 --> 01:00:27,211
Oh. These aren't together, sir.

1203
01:00:27,294 --> 01:00:28,462
Oh.

1204
01:00:28,545 --> 01:00:30,464
Well, we can cover
more ground that way.

1205
01:00:30,631 --> 01:00:31,715
Keep your eyes peeled.

1206
01:00:31,798 --> 01:00:32,841
Yes, sir.

1207
01:00:33,509 --> 01:00:35,177
(AUDIENCE CHATTERING)

1208
01:00:40,516 --> 01:00:42,518
(ROUSING MUSIC PLAYING)

1209
01:00:43,310 --> 01:00:44,436
STOPPARD: Cheers.

1210
01:00:55,280 --> 01:00:56,281
(MUSIC FADES)

1211
01:00:57,241 --> 01:00:58,281
SHEILA: (AS MOLLIE) Hello?

1212
01:01:01,620 --> 01:01:02,621
Hello?

1213
01:01:03,372 --> 01:01:05,624
- Is anyone there?
- (PHONE RINGING)

1214
01:01:05,707 --> 01:01:08,043
MRS. BOYLE: Who's calling
at this late hour?

1215
01:01:09,253 --> 01:01:10,254
MOLLIE: Yes?

1216
01:01:10,838 --> 01:01:11,839
All right then.

1217
01:01:12,923 --> 01:01:14,675
That was Scotland Yard.

1218
01:01:14,758 --> 01:01:16,635
They're sending
out an inspector.

1219
01:01:16,885 --> 01:01:19,847
In this unseasonable blizzard?

1220
01:01:19,930 --> 01:01:22,140
- What on Earth for?
- (MOLLIE SCREAMS)

1221
01:01:22,224 --> 01:01:23,984
- (STALKER GASPS)
- MAJOR METCALF: Good Lord.

1222
01:01:25,686 --> 01:01:26,728
MOLLIE: Inspector.

1223
01:01:26,812 --> 01:01:28,052
DICKIE: (AS TROTTER) Thank you.

1224
01:01:29,356 --> 01:01:30,357
Good evening.

1225
01:01:32,568 --> 01:01:34,903
I am Detective Sergeant Trotter.

1226
01:01:35,737 --> 01:01:37,114
Please excuse the limp.

1227
01:01:37,281 --> 01:01:40,075
An old war wound
playing up in the cold.

1228
01:01:40,242 --> 01:01:42,786
I'm assuming you were
warned of my arrival?

1229
01:01:44,246 --> 01:01:47,457
Apropos of nothing,
I'm a magistrate.

1230
01:01:47,624 --> 01:01:50,377
Also, he looks too young
to be an inspector.

1231
01:01:50,544 --> 01:01:53,589
Well, I'm old enough to
remember the Corrigan Case.

1232
01:01:53,755 --> 01:01:56,633
Yes, a dreadful business.

1233
01:01:57,259 --> 01:02:01,263
Two brothers who put their faith
in the British social services.

1234
01:02:01,889 --> 01:02:04,975
A sorry tale of abuse
that ended in tragedy.

1235
01:02:06,518 --> 01:02:08,103
Yes, it was in
all of the papers.

1236
01:02:08,187 --> 01:02:09,914
MERVYN: (SOFTLY) Gio, I
can't sit through this again.

1237
01:02:09,938 --> 01:02:11,773
I'm sorry. Will you excuse me?

1238
01:02:11,940 --> 01:02:15,777
TROTTER: One died, the
other left traumatized.

1239
01:02:16,862 --> 01:02:19,281
I shudder to think what
an ordeal like that

1240
01:02:19,364 --> 01:02:21,116
might do to a vulnerable mind.

1241
01:02:21,200 --> 01:02:22,260
(WHISPERS) Won't be a moment.

1242
01:02:22,284 --> 01:02:23,827
I'm just going to
try and catch Mervyn.

1243
01:02:23,911 --> 01:02:25,621
MOLLIE: Oh, bother.
I forgot the tea.

1244
01:02:25,787 --> 01:02:30,459
TROTTER: By God, that has to be
the worst cup of tea I've ever had.

1245
01:02:30,542 --> 01:02:31,960
(AUDIENCE CHUCKLES)

1246
01:02:32,044 --> 01:02:33,587
MRS. BOYLE: I agree.

1247
01:02:34,338 --> 01:02:37,758
Did you make it in a
teapot or a plant pot?

1248
01:02:37,841 --> 01:02:38,842
STOPPARD: Pardon me.

1249
01:02:38,926 --> 01:02:40,278
- Excuse me. Thank you. Sorry.
- MOLLIE: Oh, dear.

1250
01:02:40,302 --> 01:02:41,362
Pardon me. Excuse me. Sorry.

1251
01:02:41,386 --> 01:02:43,972
MOLLIE: I've already had
another disaster in the kitchen.

1252
01:02:44,723 --> 01:02:48,060
I left out the steak pieces
in my steak and kidney pie.

1253
01:02:49,436 --> 01:02:50,562
STOPPARD: Gloves.

1254
01:02:50,646 --> 01:02:52,790
MOLLIE: Kidney pie just doesn't
have the same ring to it.

1255
01:02:52,814 --> 01:02:54,358
STOPPARD: Sorry.
Excuse me. Pardon me.

1256
01:02:54,441 --> 01:02:55,651
Excuse me. Terribly sorry.

1257
01:02:56,777 --> 01:02:58,445
Bleeding gloves. I'm so sorry.

1258
01:02:58,612 --> 01:03:01,949
There they are. Thank you.
Sorry. Sorry. Terribly sorry.

1259
01:03:02,032 --> 01:03:03,092
MAJOR METCALF: I'm
beginning to think

1260
01:03:03,116 --> 01:03:04,177
it was a dreadful
mistake to skip lunch.

1261
01:03:04,201 --> 01:03:05,410
STOPPARD: Excuse me.

1262
01:03:06,745 --> 01:03:08,580
MOLLIE: I'll open a tin of peas.

1263
01:03:10,749 --> 01:03:12,918
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1264
01:03:45,242 --> 01:03:47,744
ANNOUNCER: (ON RADIO) <i>We
interrupt </i>Book at Bedtime

1265
01:03:47,828 --> 01:03:51,456
<i>to warn residents in the
Colney Hatch area of London</i>

1266
01:03:51,540 --> 01:03:54,877
<i>to be on the lookout
for an escaped lunatic.</i>

1267
01:03:54,960 --> 01:03:56,170
- (SWITCH THUDS)
- (GASPS)

1268
01:04:00,340 --> 01:04:01,717
- (SWITCH THUDS)
- Hmm.

1269
01:04:03,510 --> 01:04:06,555
(WHISTLING SONG)

1270
01:04:10,642 --> 01:04:11,643
(GASPS)

1271
01:04:11,727 --> 01:04:13,812
(SIGHS IN RELIEF)
You startled me.

1272
01:04:14,563 --> 01:04:16,690
(GASPS, CHUCKLES)
You startled me.

1273
01:04:16,773 --> 01:04:18,442
(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING)

1274
01:04:18,525 --> 01:04:20,694
- (CHOKES)
- (MRS. BOYLE GASPS, GRUNTS)

1275
01:04:23,071 --> 01:04:24,114
(MERVYN GRUNTS)

1276
01:04:24,198 --> 01:04:25,741
(STRAINING)

1277
01:04:28,202 --> 01:04:30,537
(BOTH CHOKING)

1278
01:04:33,540 --> 01:04:34,666
(MERVYN GRUNTS)

1279
01:04:34,750 --> 01:04:36,877
(MUSIC RISING)

1280
01:04:36,960 --> 01:04:38,921
(DRAMATIC END NOTE PLAYING)

1281
01:04:46,428 --> 01:04:47,429
(MUSIC FADES)

1282
01:04:52,601 --> 01:04:53,936
Turn the lights on.

1283
01:04:54,019 --> 01:04:56,772
- (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
- (SWITCHES CLICKING)

1284
01:04:59,274 --> 01:05:00,734
(SCREAMS)

1285
01:05:01,568 --> 01:05:04,154
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

1286
01:05:05,948 --> 01:05:06,990
(DOOR OPENS)

1287
01:05:07,074 --> 01:05:08,617
(AUDIENCE CHATTERING)

1288
01:05:09,618 --> 01:05:11,161
(WOMEN SCREAMING)

1289
01:05:12,162 --> 01:05:14,164
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

1290
01:05:19,294 --> 01:05:21,421
Stop in the name of the law!

1291
01:05:31,473 --> 01:05:33,225
(GRUNTS) Bollocks!

1292
01:05:35,811 --> 01:05:37,187
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

1293
01:05:37,271 --> 01:05:38,981
DICKIE: Well,
that's a good thing.

1294
01:05:39,064 --> 01:05:40,424
The limp, was it
too much? (GRUNTS)

1295
01:05:41,900 --> 01:05:43,569
- Oh.
- STALKER: Oh, God.

1296
01:05:43,652 --> 01:05:45,779
Oh, sorry, sir. I thought
you were somebody else.

1297
01:05:45,863 --> 01:05:47,030
No, no, it's all right.

1298
01:05:47,322 --> 01:05:48,740
And thank you for the tickets.

1299
01:05:48,824 --> 01:05:49,867
Very welcome.

1300
01:05:54,413 --> 01:05:56,039
(MUSIC HALTS)

1301
01:05:57,332 --> 01:06:00,002
(CAT MEOWING IN DISTANCE)

1302
01:06:02,171 --> 01:06:03,505
(STALKER YELLS)

1303
01:06:03,589 --> 01:06:04,590
(THUMP)

1304
01:06:06,466 --> 01:06:08,886
(GASPING)

1305
01:06:13,432 --> 01:06:14,474
(GROANS)

1306
01:06:14,558 --> 01:06:16,977
(EERIE MUSIC PLAYING)

1307
01:06:17,978 --> 01:06:20,355
- (FOOTSTEPS CRUNCHING ON SNOW)
- (SOFT ANIMALS' CALLS)

1308
01:06:24,818 --> 01:06:25,861
(BOTTLES CLINK)

1309
01:06:29,239 --> 01:06:30,699
(RATTLING)

1310
01:06:36,288 --> 01:06:37,623
(STOPPARD SIGHS)

1311
01:06:39,917 --> 01:06:41,043
LEO: There ya go.

1312
01:06:41,335 --> 01:06:42,461
Bottoms up.

1313
01:06:42,628 --> 01:06:43,629
Cheers.

1314
01:06:45,339 --> 01:06:47,299
(EERIE MUSIC CONTINUES)

1315
01:06:48,800 --> 01:06:50,469
What brings you to
this neck of the woods?

1316
01:06:50,552 --> 01:06:52,471
Oh, a murder investigation.

1317
01:06:52,638 --> 01:06:54,848
Yeah? Anyone I know?

1318
01:06:56,141 --> 01:06:57,184
You.

1319
01:06:57,267 --> 01:06:58,310
(MUSIC HALTS)

1320
01:06:58,977 --> 01:06:59,978
(SWALLOWS)

1321
01:07:00,854 --> 01:07:02,105
I'm sorry, I thought...

1322
01:07:02,189 --> 01:07:04,358
No, no, no. It's all right.
It's all right. Uh...

1323
01:07:05,943 --> 01:07:07,694
Say, uh, Inspector.

1324
01:07:09,071 --> 01:07:11,615
Tell me, was anyone, uh...

1325
01:07:13,367 --> 01:07:15,786
you know, sad to see me go?

1326
01:07:19,957 --> 01:07:20,958
Ah.

1327
01:07:22,292 --> 01:07:23,293
Figures.

1328
01:07:31,552 --> 01:07:33,303
I'm sorry, sir, you
can't go in there.

1329
01:07:33,387 --> 01:07:34,388
Ah...

1330
01:07:34,471 --> 01:07:36,032
You can only go in
if you have a ticket.

1331
01:07:36,056 --> 01:07:37,933
I had a ticket. It
was in my pocket.

1332
01:07:38,559 --> 01:07:41,770
That's... I could have sworn
I had on a pair of trousers.

1333
01:07:42,271 --> 01:07:43,522
I had trousers on.

1334
01:07:45,315 --> 01:07:46,358
Where's my ticket?

1335
01:07:46,441 --> 01:07:47,860
- (SIGHS)
- I'm sorry, sir.

1336
01:07:47,943 --> 01:07:49,546
I can't let you in
unless you have a ticket.

1337
01:07:49,570 --> 01:07:51,947
I had a ticket. I just
don't have it on me.

1338
01:07:52,030 --> 01:07:54,074
Let me in! Stop mucking about.

1339
01:07:54,157 --> 01:07:55,635
- I've gotta go in.
- No, please, sir.

1340
01:07:55,659 --> 01:07:58,245
(MAN WHISTLING
<i>THREE BLIND MICE)</i>

1341
01:07:58,620 --> 01:07:59,913
You. I know you.

1342
01:08:01,540 --> 01:08:02,624
What are you doing?

1343
01:08:02,708 --> 01:08:04,251
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

1344
01:08:04,334 --> 01:08:06,170
STALKER: <i>Sir. Sir.</i>

1345
01:08:06,253 --> 01:08:07,653
- (MUSIC STOPS)
- I've got a ticket!

1346
01:08:12,718 --> 01:08:14,094
The hell is going on?

1347
01:08:17,764 --> 01:08:18,974
What am I doing here?

1348
01:08:19,933 --> 01:08:21,435
What happened to my trousers?

1349
01:08:21,602 --> 01:08:23,060
You asked me to press them, sir.

1350
01:08:23,145 --> 01:08:24,145
I did?

1351
01:08:24,229 --> 01:08:25,522
Yes, sir. You were adamant.

1352
01:08:28,442 --> 01:08:29,859
How long have I been here?

1353
01:08:30,402 --> 01:08:31,486
Eighteen hours.

1354
01:08:33,447 --> 01:08:34,531
(GROANS)

1355
01:08:35,323 --> 01:08:37,492
STOPPARD: (GRUNTS) My
head is killing me.

1356
01:08:37,658 --> 01:08:39,328
It's bloody freezing in here.

1357
01:08:41,412 --> 01:08:42,581
Did you make an arrest?

1358
01:08:44,124 --> 01:08:45,125
We did.

1359
01:08:45,834 --> 01:08:47,627
Who was it? Was it Gio?

1360
01:08:47,711 --> 01:08:48,712
Gio?

1361
01:08:49,379 --> 01:08:52,758
Yeah, Gio. The... The
Italian chap, the killer.

1362
01:08:52,841 --> 01:08:55,594
The man in a darkish
overcoat, soft felt hat...

1363
01:08:55,761 --> 01:08:57,261
I chased out the theater.

1364
01:08:57,429 --> 01:08:59,264
Inspector, that man was you.

1365
01:08:59,640 --> 01:09:00,640
What?

1366
01:09:01,058 --> 01:09:04,102
You are the man in
the darkish overcoat

1367
01:09:04,185 --> 01:09:07,898
and the soft felt hat that
Constable Stalker here

1368
01:09:07,981 --> 01:09:09,524
chased from the theater.

1369
01:09:10,776 --> 01:09:13,612
I'm sorry, I'm not following.

1370
01:09:13,694 --> 01:09:15,447
I think I might
have a concussion.

1371
01:09:15,656 --> 01:09:16,782
Or the shakes?

1372
01:09:18,367 --> 01:09:20,368
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1373
01:09:21,953 --> 01:09:23,580
STOPPARD: No, this
is ridiculous.

1374
01:09:23,663 --> 01:09:25,832
What possible reason

1375
01:09:25,916 --> 01:09:27,751
could I have for
strangling a playwright?

1376
01:09:27,835 --> 01:09:30,127
I haven't seen
anything he's done.

1377
01:09:30,295 --> 01:09:34,006
No, but Mervyn saw the woman who
visited Kopernick at the Savoy.

1378
01:09:34,966 --> 01:09:35,968
So?

1379
01:09:36,676 --> 01:09:40,596
Inspector, have you
spoken to Joyce lately?

1380
01:09:41,223 --> 01:09:42,349
Joyce?

1381
01:09:42,515 --> 01:09:43,517
Your wife.

1382
01:09:43,684 --> 01:09:44,685
Ex-wife.

1383
01:09:44,852 --> 01:09:46,979
Yes. I met her once
at a police social.

1384
01:09:47,187 --> 01:09:49,857
A plain girl.

1385
01:09:50,023 --> 01:09:51,024
Very homely.

1386
01:09:51,233 --> 01:09:53,484
What does Joyce have
to do with anything?

1387
01:09:53,652 --> 01:09:56,488
Uh, her name was in Leo's
little black book, sir.

1388
01:09:56,947 --> 01:09:58,073
Oh, come on. You don't...

1389
01:09:58,156 --> 01:10:00,158
You don't seriously
think that Leo and...

1390
01:10:00,242 --> 01:10:02,494
COMMISSIONER: Didn't your
wife leave you for a Yank?

1391
01:10:02,911 --> 01:10:05,205
Leo was an American G.I.

1392
01:10:05,747 --> 01:10:08,458
Will you listen to yourselves?
You hear what you're sayin'?

1393
01:10:09,793 --> 01:10:10,794
Constable.

1394
01:10:16,466 --> 01:10:18,677
"They do it out
of revenge or rage

1395
01:10:18,927 --> 01:10:22,890
"because they have lost a loved
one and can't forgive or forget.

1396
01:10:23,432 --> 01:10:25,726
"So they just stew and fester

1397
01:10:25,893 --> 01:10:29,563
"until it all comes out in a
sudden, frenzied act of violence."

1398
01:10:32,316 --> 01:10:33,984
You wrote that down.

1399
01:10:37,196 --> 01:10:39,364
That was a private conversation.

1400
01:10:40,616 --> 01:10:42,701
Well, I thought it
could be important, sir.

1401
01:10:44,119 --> 01:10:45,495
STOPPARD: Unbelievable.

1402
01:10:48,165 --> 01:10:49,333
We found her.

1403
01:10:49,499 --> 01:10:50,834
- Who?
- Joyce.

1404
01:10:51,001 --> 01:10:52,669
Joyce. Joyce is here?

1405
01:10:52,753 --> 01:10:53,754
Constable.

1406
01:10:57,299 --> 01:10:59,468
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC INTENSIFYING)

1407
01:11:11,438 --> 01:11:12,439
(MUSIC STOPS)

1408
01:11:12,523 --> 01:11:13,815
That's not my wife.

1409
01:11:15,359 --> 01:11:17,528
- I'm sorry?
- I said that's not my wife.

1410
01:11:17,903 --> 01:11:19,696
But it is your ex-wife.

1411
01:11:20,405 --> 01:11:22,908
Never seen that woman
before in my life.

1412
01:11:25,035 --> 01:11:26,286
But your name is Joyce?

1413
01:11:26,620 --> 01:11:27,621
Uh...

1414
01:11:28,038 --> 01:11:30,040
- Well, it's a common name.
- (CHUCKLES LIGHTLY)

1415
01:11:31,458 --> 01:11:32,751
- 'Course it is.
- Yeah.

1416
01:11:34,503 --> 01:11:35,754
COMMISSIONER: 'Course it is.

1417
01:11:38,006 --> 01:11:40,342
Well, Inspector, in
that case, I believe

1418
01:11:40,884 --> 01:11:42,469
you are owed an apology.

1419
01:11:44,721 --> 01:11:46,765
(GULPS) Constable.

1420
01:11:48,475 --> 01:11:50,853
Uh... Yes, sir. O' course.

1421
01:11:51,061 --> 01:11:53,105
I'm... I'm so sorry,
sir. I just...

1422
01:11:53,188 --> 01:11:57,192
I just got the wrong end of the
stick, and I have no excuse. I just...

1423
01:11:57,276 --> 01:11:59,987
I jumped to conclusions
again. I'm so sorry.

1424
01:12:05,284 --> 01:12:08,203
Commissioner, why don't you
run along back to the office,

1425
01:12:08,370 --> 01:12:09,913
look over the
quarterly accounts.

1426
01:12:09,997 --> 01:12:11,957
Let me handle the
murder investigation.

1427
01:12:12,207 --> 01:12:13,375
Inspector.

1428
01:12:16,628 --> 01:12:17,713
(WHISPERS) Sorry.

1429
01:12:19,798 --> 01:12:21,967
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

1430
01:12:52,414 --> 01:12:53,916
WOOLF: It's Dickie and Sheila.

1431
01:12:54,166 --> 01:12:57,169
DICKIE: Hello, Woolf. Didn't
expect to see you here.

1432
01:12:58,420 --> 01:13:00,380
(HUMMING)

1433
01:13:01,089 --> 01:13:03,175
- (DOORBELL RINGING)
- Perhaps, it is

1434
01:13:03,342 --> 01:13:05,928
Miss Rams... bottom. (MUMBLING)

1435
01:13:06,011 --> 01:13:08,305
- Get that... (SIGHS)
- (DOORBELL CONTINUES RINGING)

1436
01:13:15,145 --> 01:13:16,480
If you have broken down,

1437
01:13:16,563 --> 01:13:19,525
there is a garage not
15 miles from here.

1438
01:13:19,608 --> 01:13:21,485
(CHUCKLES) No, we're
here for dinner.

1439
01:13:21,568 --> 01:13:23,195
I don't think so, sir.

1440
01:13:23,278 --> 01:13:26,114
(CHUCKLES) This is
Winterbrook House?

1441
01:13:26,532 --> 01:13:27,824
The Christie residence?

1442
01:13:28,742 --> 01:13:29,785
It is.

1443
01:13:29,868 --> 01:13:30,908
Uh, we have an invitation.

1444
01:13:30,953 --> 01:13:31,954
DICKIE: We do, yes.

1445
01:13:33,914 --> 01:13:36,124
Richard Attenborough.
Friends call me "Dickie."

1446
01:13:39,753 --> 01:13:41,588
(WIND WHISTLING)

1447
01:13:43,966 --> 01:13:46,176
I do hope you
haven't traveled far.

1448
01:13:50,180 --> 01:13:52,182
MAN: Fellowes! Who is it?

1449
01:13:52,266 --> 01:13:54,977
- No one, sir. Tinkers.
- (FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

1450
01:13:55,060 --> 01:13:57,312
MAN: What, in this
unseasonable blizzard?

1451
01:13:57,396 --> 01:13:58,939
Come on, man. Open sesame.

1452
01:13:59,857 --> 01:14:01,697
Richard Attenborough.
Friends call me "Dickie."

1453
01:14:01,733 --> 01:14:03,735
Max Mallowan, eminent
archaeologist.

1454
01:14:03,986 --> 01:14:05,296
Good God, man,
you're frozen solid.

1455
01:14:05,320 --> 01:14:06,840
- It's cold. It's cold, yes.
- Come in.

1456
01:14:06,864 --> 01:14:08,782
- Hello, Sheila Sim. (CHUCKLES)
- Hello.

1457
01:14:08,866 --> 01:14:10,200
- John Woolf.
- How do you do?

1458
01:14:10,534 --> 01:14:11,535
Ann Saville.

1459
01:14:11,618 --> 01:14:13,453
We're friends of
Petula. Spencer.

1460
01:14:13,537 --> 01:14:15,247
- Oh, yes. I know Choo.
- (CHUCKLES)

1461
01:14:15,998 --> 01:14:18,500
We thought we'd been
invited for dinner.

1462
01:14:18,667 --> 01:14:20,586
Yes, we received this,

1463
01:14:21,211 --> 01:14:23,338
but apparently, not from you.

1464
01:14:23,505 --> 01:14:24,631
Extraordinary.

1465
01:14:25,465 --> 01:14:28,093
You know who's going
to love this? Agatha.

1466
01:14:28,260 --> 01:14:30,053
It's just like one
of her confections.

1467
01:14:30,220 --> 01:14:31,305
She's in the kitchen now

1468
01:14:31,388 --> 01:14:33,098
trying to figure
out some new ending.

1469
01:14:33,182 --> 01:14:36,018
(SNICKERS) It helps to do
the dishes, apparently.

1470
01:14:36,101 --> 01:14:38,020
(ALL CHUCKLE)

1471
01:14:39,688 --> 01:14:42,941
Ooh, hello. Who else
didn't we invite to dinner?

1472
01:14:43,108 --> 01:14:44,359
Ah, it's Petula.

1473
01:14:44,526 --> 01:14:45,777
Why, so it is.

1474
01:14:46,695 --> 01:14:48,113
Come in out of the cold, Choo!

1475
01:14:48,197 --> 01:14:49,907
What on Earth have
you got there?

1476
01:14:51,033 --> 01:14:52,117
It's not Mother, is it?

1477
01:14:52,201 --> 01:14:53,619
PETULA: 'Fraid so.

1478
01:14:53,994 --> 01:14:54,995
Oh, God.

1479
01:14:55,829 --> 01:14:57,056
Better make that eight
for dinner, Fellowes,

1480
01:14:57,080 --> 01:14:58,707
- and let Agatha know.
- Yes, sir.

1481
01:14:58,790 --> 01:15:00,059
And get a shovel
to clear the path.

1482
01:15:00,083 --> 01:15:01,084
Yes, sir.

1483
01:15:01,168 --> 01:15:02,252
And do we have enough coal?

1484
01:15:02,336 --> 01:15:03,921
Yes, sir. Three bags full, sir.

1485
01:15:04,004 --> 01:15:05,881
- PETULA: Hello, Maxie.
- Hello, darling.

1486
01:15:06,548 --> 01:15:08,425
Oh, it's a full house.

1487
01:15:08,717 --> 01:15:09,885
- (SHEILA CHUCKLES)
- Yes.

1488
01:15:10,052 --> 01:15:11,053
Mother.

1489
01:15:11,136 --> 01:15:13,056
Come on in. Straight
through to the drawing room.

1490
01:15:13,222 --> 01:15:14,431
PETULA: Here. MAX: Now,

1491
01:15:14,598 --> 01:15:17,935
I have a rather potent
Mesopotamian aperitif

1492
01:15:18,018 --> 01:15:19,811
that'll have you
thawed out in a jiffy.

1493
01:15:19,895 --> 01:15:20,896
(DOOR CLOSES)

1494
01:15:20,979 --> 01:15:23,106
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1495
01:15:45,546 --> 01:15:48,048
I'm sorry again that you
had to find out like this.

1496
01:15:48,215 --> 01:15:50,676
Oh, I can't say it
came as a surprise.

1497
01:15:51,635 --> 01:15:53,512
Leo was a bad seed.

1498
01:15:54,346 --> 01:15:55,848
Always in trouble, he was.

1499
01:15:56,932 --> 01:15:58,809
He picked a fight the
night he took us out.

1500
01:15:58,892 --> 01:16:01,103
Mmm. Mervyn Cocker-Norris
at the hotel.

1501
01:16:01,895 --> 01:16:03,730
No. At the pictures.

1502
01:16:04,064 --> 01:16:05,065
Oh.

1503
01:16:13,365 --> 01:16:16,034
He turned on this tall
fella who came in after us

1504
01:16:16,118 --> 01:16:17,536
and shouted,

1505
01:16:17,619 --> 01:16:19,538
"What are you following
me for, buddy?"

1506
01:16:20,289 --> 01:16:21,832
And, um... (SCOFFS)

1507
01:16:21,915 --> 01:16:23,083
Did he know a good dentist,

1508
01:16:23,166 --> 01:16:24,918
'cause he was about to
lose a lot of teeth.

1509
01:16:26,712 --> 01:16:27,713
Hmm.

1510
01:16:27,796 --> 01:16:30,090
Right, who's ready for a top-up?

1511
01:16:30,174 --> 01:16:31,216
GUESTS: No.

1512
01:16:31,300 --> 01:16:32,718
PETULA: Where's the old girl?

1513
01:16:32,801 --> 01:16:34,595
Not gonna play the
recluse card, is she?

1514
01:16:34,761 --> 01:16:36,889
Oh, no, no, no. She'll
be down soon enough.

1515
01:16:36,972 --> 01:16:38,473
(CLATTERING UPSTAIRS)

1516
01:16:39,308 --> 01:16:40,726
That will be Fellowes.

1517
01:16:40,893 --> 01:16:42,394
The man's an oaf.

1518
01:16:46,857 --> 01:16:49,109
- A tall fella, you say?
- JOYCE: Mmm.

1519
01:16:49,860 --> 01:16:51,445
Had a funny accent.

1520
01:16:53,280 --> 01:16:54,281
Italian?

1521
01:16:54,448 --> 01:16:55,657
No, not that funny.

1522
01:16:55,824 --> 01:16:57,075
More like...

1523
01:16:59,036 --> 01:17:00,454
a village idiot.

1524
01:17:01,371 --> 01:17:03,707
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES)

1525
01:17:04,875 --> 01:17:06,335
I'm sorry, but you
have to get out.

1526
01:17:06,418 --> 01:17:07,544
(DOOR THUDS)

1527
01:17:09,046 --> 01:17:11,882
Oh. No. Good heavens. No. Uh...

1528
01:17:11,965 --> 01:17:13,967
<i>- Che cosa succede?
</i>- (STOPPARD FUMBLING)

1529
01:17:14,051 --> 01:17:15,385
<i>Poli... Polizei.</i>

1530
01:17:15,469 --> 01:17:16,762
<i>Teléfono, por favor.</i>

1531
01:17:16,845 --> 01:17:18,222
<i>- Telefono?
</i>- Yes.<i> Sì.</i>

1532
01:17:18,305 --> 01:17:19,640
<i>- Sta là.
- Gracias.</i>

1533
01:17:19,723 --> 01:17:21,308
(PHONE RINGS)

1534
01:17:22,267 --> 01:17:24,394
Scotland Yard, Sergeant
Bakewell speaking.

1535
01:17:24,561 --> 01:17:25,687
Yes, Stoppard here.

1536
01:17:31,109 --> 01:17:32,402
Police, stand back.

1537
01:17:32,736 --> 01:17:34,571
- He keeps a key...
- (STALKER GRUNTS)

1538
01:17:34,655 --> 01:17:35,781
under the mat.

1539
01:17:36,573 --> 01:17:37,574
(PANTS)

1540
01:17:40,410 --> 01:17:42,162
BAKEWELL: <i>Let me
guess, Inspector.</i>

1541
01:17:42,329 --> 01:17:43,580
<i>You're after an address.</i>

1542
01:17:44,206 --> 01:17:45,207
How did you know that?

1543
01:17:45,374 --> 01:17:46,416
Constable Stalker, sir.

1544
01:17:46,500 --> 01:17:48,544
She called just now for
the same information.

1545
01:17:49,795 --> 01:17:50,879
Stalker?

1546
01:17:58,303 --> 01:17:59,763
(WOMAN WHIMPERING)

1547
01:17:59,847 --> 01:18:00,889
Agatha?

1548
01:18:00,973 --> 01:18:02,349
Gosh, is she all right?

1549
01:18:02,432 --> 01:18:04,852
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC INTENSIFYING)

1550
01:18:29,501 --> 01:18:31,503
(MUSIC BUILDING UP)

1551
01:18:34,006 --> 01:18:35,007
(MUSIC ENDS)

1552
01:18:35,090 --> 01:18:37,217
Where's Agatha? What
have you done with her?

1553
01:18:45,017 --> 01:18:46,643
- It was the usher, sir.
- I know.

1554
01:18:46,727 --> 01:18:48,312
He was under our
noses all this time.

1555
01:18:48,395 --> 01:18:50,439
- Is he in?
- No, sir. But I found this.

1556
01:18:50,647 --> 01:18:52,041
If we get going
now, sir, we can...

1557
01:18:52,065 --> 01:18:53,376
I can take it from
here, Constable.

1558
01:18:53,400 --> 01:18:54,860
Oh, right. And... And me, sir?

1559
01:18:54,943 --> 01:18:56,195
Go back to the station.

1560
01:18:57,446 --> 01:18:58,488
Yes, sir.

1561
01:18:58,572 --> 01:18:59,656
Oh, and, Constable?

1562
01:18:59,740 --> 01:19:00,824
Yes, sir?

1563
01:19:01,325 --> 01:19:03,076
Make a start on the paperwork.

1564
01:19:05,078 --> 01:19:06,371
- Yes, sir.
- (CAR DOOR CLOSES)

1565
01:19:06,455 --> 01:19:08,207
(CAR DEPARTS)

1566
01:19:11,001 --> 01:19:14,838
(PANTING)

1567
01:19:17,090 --> 01:19:19,426
(UNNERVING MUSIC PLAYING)

1568
01:19:19,510 --> 01:19:22,471
(SOFTLY) Is it me, or does
he look awfully familiar?

1569
01:19:22,554 --> 01:19:25,766
It's Dennis. He's an usher
from the Ambassadors.

1570
01:19:26,642 --> 01:19:28,185
Oh, Dennis!

1571
01:19:28,352 --> 01:19:29,728
So nice to see you.

1572
01:19:29,811 --> 01:19:32,564
This is a strange coincidence.
What are you doing here?

1573
01:19:33,565 --> 01:19:34,733
Well, I invited you.

1574
01:19:35,817 --> 01:19:36,818
Oh, my God.

1575
01:19:37,486 --> 01:19:39,112
You killed Leo and Mervyn!

1576
01:19:39,863 --> 01:19:40,864
I did.

1577
01:19:41,448 --> 01:19:43,909
I wanted to stop the
film and the play.

1578
01:19:43,992 --> 01:19:45,619
What film? What play?

1579
01:19:45,702 --> 01:19:46,870
<i>- The Mousetrap!
</i>- (ALL GASP)

1580
01:19:46,954 --> 01:19:48,205
Now, look here, Dennis.

1581
01:19:48,288 --> 01:19:50,707
We all have strong
opinions on the theater.

1582
01:19:50,791 --> 01:19:54,419
In a sense, that's what it's
there for, to provoke emotion.

1583
01:19:54,878 --> 01:19:57,631
And I appreciate you don't
care for<i> The Mousetrap.</i>

1584
01:19:57,714 --> 01:20:00,843
I'll be the first to admit
it's not exactly <i>Hamlet.</i>

1585
01:20:01,218 --> 01:20:03,428
But you must see

1586
01:20:03,971 --> 01:20:05,889
that this is a bit
of an overreaction.

1587
01:20:05,973 --> 01:20:07,683
That's not what this is.

1588
01:20:07,850 --> 01:20:10,269
Then, what... what is this?

1589
01:20:10,727 --> 01:20:13,230
It's not your story to
tell, is it? It's mine.

1590
01:20:13,313 --> 01:20:14,648
PETULA: Oh, I might have known.

1591
01:20:14,731 --> 01:20:15,983
A disgruntled writer.

1592
01:20:16,066 --> 01:20:18,402
Don't tell me, you
had the idea first?

1593
01:20:18,569 --> 01:20:20,821
No. It happened to me.

1594
01:20:20,904 --> 01:20:22,173
I'm sorry, I am completely lost.

1595
01:20:22,197 --> 01:20:23,677
I don't have a
theatrical background.

1596
01:20:23,949 --> 01:20:26,326
You're not Dennis
Corrigan, are you?

1597
01:20:28,245 --> 01:20:29,246
(HUFFS)

1598
01:20:30,497 --> 01:20:32,040
Oh, you poor boy.

1599
01:20:32,833 --> 01:20:33,834
How do you mean?

1600
01:20:33,917 --> 01:20:36,253
He lost his brother
in real life.

1601
01:20:36,461 --> 01:20:38,297
Dreadful business, it was.

1602
01:20:38,463 --> 01:20:40,757
It was years ago, now.
I told you about it.

1603
01:20:40,841 --> 01:20:43,051
It was the case <i>The
Mousetrap</i> was based on.

1604
01:20:43,135 --> 01:20:45,429
Inspired by,
Mother. And loosely.

1605
01:20:46,054 --> 01:20:47,723
Oh, but you're an usher.

1606
01:20:47,890 --> 01:20:50,017
You had to watch that
play night after night.

1607
01:20:50,559 --> 01:20:52,102
It must've been torture.

1608
01:20:53,187 --> 01:20:54,813
I thought it would help.

1609
01:20:55,898 --> 01:20:57,774
<i>He was only six when
he died, my brother.</i>

1610
01:20:57,858 --> 01:21:00,652
<i>The Mousetrap</i> is actually
based on a real-life case.

1611
01:21:00,736 --> 01:21:02,988
DENNIS: <i>Neglected and left
for dead by the people</i>

1612
01:21:03,071 --> 01:21:04,865
<i>who were supposed
to look after us.</i>

1613
01:21:05,532 --> 01:21:09,369
<i>It sold a lot of newspapers,
but no one cared about us.</i>

1614
01:21:09,453 --> 01:21:11,538
(SLOW DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

1615
01:21:11,622 --> 01:21:13,874
<i>I thought the play
would be different.</i>

1616
01:21:13,957 --> 01:21:16,627
<i>A famous writer was
going to tell our story.</i>

1617
01:21:16,710 --> 01:21:20,088
Two brothers who put their faith
in the British social services.

1618
01:21:20,172 --> 01:21:23,050
DENNIS:<i> But when I saw what
Agatha Christie had done,</i>

1619
01:21:23,133 --> 01:21:26,970
<i>used our pain and suffering as a
motive for a deranged killer...</i>

1620
01:21:27,054 --> 01:21:28,055
(GASPS)

1621
01:21:28,138 --> 01:21:30,807
<i>my brother's death reduced
to a cheap sideshow...</i>

1622
01:21:30,891 --> 01:21:32,559
There's been a murder?

1623
01:21:32,643 --> 01:21:34,078
DENNIS: <i>I knew he
wouldn't be able</i>

1624
01:21:34,102 --> 01:21:35,979
<i>to rest in peace
until the play ended.</i>

1625
01:21:36,438 --> 01:21:38,148
But it didn't.

1626
01:21:38,982 --> 01:21:41,985
It just went on, and on, and on.

1627
01:21:42,069 --> 01:21:44,404
<i>The Mousetrap</i> is 100, not out.

1628
01:21:44,488 --> 01:21:46,365
DENNIS:<i> When I heard
about the film adaptation,</i>

1629
01:21:46,448 --> 01:21:47,533
<i>I just snapped.</i>

1630
01:21:48,492 --> 01:21:51,078
Without me, there is no
movie. You understand?

1631
01:21:51,245 --> 01:21:52,287
You got a problem, buddy?

1632
01:21:52,371 --> 01:21:54,248
DENNIS:<i> I killed the
director to stop the film,</i>

1633
01:21:55,249 --> 01:21:58,335
<i>and thought a corpse on the stage
would put an end to the play.</i>

1634
01:21:58,418 --> 01:22:00,170
(SCREAMS)

1635
01:22:00,254 --> 01:22:02,214
<i>But they didn't even
close the theater.</i>

1636
01:22:02,297 --> 01:22:03,900
Do you think you might
be finished in time

1637
01:22:03,924 --> 01:22:05,300
for curtain up tomorrow night?

1638
01:22:05,384 --> 01:22:07,177
DENNIS: <i>And Mervyn's
new ideas for the film</i>

1639
01:22:07,261 --> 01:22:08,846
<i>made me sick to my stomach.</i>

1640
01:22:08,929 --> 01:22:10,514
I'll take the bare
bones of the story,

1641
01:22:10,597 --> 01:22:14,476
a rather mundane tale of child
abuse, and make it my own.

1642
01:22:14,852 --> 01:22:16,061
DENNIS: <i>He left me no choice.</i>

1643
01:22:16,144 --> 01:22:17,145
(GASPS)

1644
01:22:17,229 --> 01:22:19,064
(SIGHS IN RELIEF)
You startled me.

1645
01:22:19,147 --> 01:22:20,649
DENNIS: <i>I had to kill him, too.</i>

1646
01:22:21,066 --> 01:22:22,276
(CHOKING)

1647
01:22:23,402 --> 01:22:25,237
<i>I thought that would
be the end of it.</i>

1648
01:22:25,821 --> 01:22:28,240
But you all just carried on
like nothing had happened.

1649
01:22:29,908 --> 01:22:31,177
- Shame on you.
- (WOOLF WHIMPERS)

1650
01:22:31,201 --> 01:22:32,202
(PETULA CLEARS THROAT)

1651
01:22:33,120 --> 01:22:36,582
Well, maybe you'll take notice if
I kill Agatha Christie herself.

1652
01:22:38,625 --> 01:22:40,711
(MUFFLED GRUNTING)

1653
01:22:40,794 --> 01:22:42,272
Oh, I think she's
tryin' to say something.

1654
01:22:42,296 --> 01:22:43,797
Oh, for God's sake, let her out.

1655
01:22:43,881 --> 01:22:44,882
I'll stop the film.

1656
01:22:44,965 --> 01:22:46,675
And the play. This is barbaric.

1657
01:22:47,009 --> 01:22:48,010
Fine.

1658
01:22:49,386 --> 01:22:51,722
(ALL GASP)

1659
01:22:52,890 --> 01:22:54,224
(SIGHS)

1660
01:22:55,392 --> 01:22:56,393
WOOLF: Edana?

1661
01:22:57,311 --> 01:22:59,354
Darling, what... what
are you doing here?

1662
01:22:59,521 --> 01:23:01,356
I followed you.

1663
01:23:01,440 --> 01:23:03,275
I suppose I was going
to make a scene.

1664
01:23:03,483 --> 01:23:05,319
- Hello, Ann.
- (ANN MUMBLES)

1665
01:23:05,402 --> 01:23:08,780
Then this beanpole assaulted
me, and I woke up in a carpet.

1666
01:23:08,947 --> 01:23:11,658
If you're not Agatha Christie,
where the hell is she?

1667
01:23:11,742 --> 01:23:13,452
Good God, man. You
mean you don't know?

1668
01:23:13,535 --> 01:23:16,246
What kind of a bumbling,
half-witted psychopath are you?

1669
01:23:16,330 --> 01:23:18,373
Will you be quiet! Please!

1670
01:23:18,957 --> 01:23:20,459
Let me think!

1671
01:23:20,792 --> 01:23:22,472
Yes, of course! Of
course. Why don't you...

1672
01:23:22,544 --> 01:23:25,422
Why don't you come in and
sit down, Dennis? Um...

1673
01:23:25,506 --> 01:23:27,174
PETULA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1674
01:23:27,257 --> 01:23:29,635
Have a little
moment to yourself.

1675
01:23:29,718 --> 01:23:31,386
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS)

1676
01:23:35,432 --> 01:23:37,392
(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

1677
01:23:47,945 --> 01:23:49,947
- (MUSIC HALTS)
- (WIND HOWLING)

1678
01:23:51,240 --> 01:23:52,866
(ENGINE ROARING)

1679
01:23:54,368 --> 01:23:56,328
(INTENSE MUSIC RESUMES)

1680
01:24:10,008 --> 01:24:12,010
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1681
01:24:13,220 --> 01:24:14,221
(SIGHS)

1682
01:24:25,190 --> 01:24:26,400
(MUSIC FADING)

1683
01:24:27,067 --> 01:24:28,235
(FELLOWES SIGHS)

1684
01:24:39,872 --> 01:24:40,873
(MOUTHING) What?

1685
01:25:02,811 --> 01:25:04,897
Uh, well... Um...

1686
01:25:05,522 --> 01:25:07,900
I, for one, believe that, uh,

1687
01:25:08,609 --> 01:25:10,652
Dennis here is owed an apology.

1688
01:25:11,028 --> 01:25:12,255
- (ALL MURMUR IN AGREEMENT)
- MAX: Yes.

1689
01:25:12,279 --> 01:25:14,281
SHEILA: He... He's
right, of course.

1690
01:25:14,448 --> 01:25:16,033
The truth is the truth.

1691
01:25:16,116 --> 01:25:18,952
It is not to be
manipulated or played with,

1692
01:25:19,036 --> 01:25:20,704
and certainly not
for entertainment.

1693
01:25:20,787 --> 01:25:22,289
MAX: No, no.
PETULA: No, no, no.

1694
01:25:22,372 --> 01:25:24,666
SHEILA: Art is supposed
to reveal the truth...

1695
01:25:24,750 --> 01:25:25,751
ANN: Yes. GROUP: Yeah.

1696
01:25:25,834 --> 01:25:27,377
SHEILA: not pervert it.

1697
01:25:27,878 --> 01:25:30,047
How would Agatha
Christie like it

1698
01:25:30,130 --> 01:25:34,468
if someone took one of her stories
and twisted it and corrupted it

1699
01:25:34,551 --> 01:25:36,637
just for the hell
of it? (CHUCKLES)

1700
01:25:36,720 --> 01:25:38,722
- (GROUP MURMURS)
- MAX: She wouldn't.

1701
01:25:38,805 --> 01:25:42,768
I... I think that we should all feel
thoroughly ashamed of ourselves.

1702
01:25:42,935 --> 01:25:45,354
AGATHA: Oh, here we
are. Tea for everyone.

1703
01:25:45,437 --> 01:25:46,605
MAX: There you are, my dear.

1704
01:25:46,688 --> 01:25:48,482
AGATHA: Sorry to have kept you.

1705
01:25:48,565 --> 01:25:50,567
No, no, please don't get
up, not on my account.

1706
01:25:51,151 --> 01:25:52,152
There, there.

1707
01:25:52,236 --> 01:25:53,278
No, no, no,

1708
01:25:53,362 --> 01:25:54,682
- no, no, it's fine.
- Be careful.

1709
01:25:54,738 --> 01:25:58,200
AGATHA: Just as it was.
I think it was that way.

1710
01:25:58,367 --> 01:26:00,202
It is so nice to see
you again, Agatha,

1711
01:26:00,285 --> 01:26:01,578
in spite of the circumstances.

1712
01:26:01,662 --> 01:26:02,829
No, no, no, not that one.

1713
01:26:02,913 --> 01:26:04,831
No, that's for
Dennis. (CHUCKLES)

1714
01:26:06,583 --> 01:26:07,584
(CUPS RATTLING)

1715
01:26:08,126 --> 01:26:09,503
It is Dennis, isn't it?

1716
01:26:10,921 --> 01:26:11,922
There we are.

1717
01:26:12,464 --> 01:26:15,092
I put an extra
lump in. (CHUCKLES)

1718
01:26:15,175 --> 01:26:16,426
Thank you.

1719
01:26:16,593 --> 01:26:18,262
Everyone else, help themselves.

1720
01:26:18,720 --> 01:26:20,040
- (GROUP MURMURS)
- (AGATHA SIGHS)

1721
01:26:20,514 --> 01:26:22,349
Now, Dennis.

1722
01:26:22,516 --> 01:26:23,684
How can I help?

1723
01:26:23,767 --> 01:26:25,394
Why don't we sit here
and drink our tea

1724
01:26:25,561 --> 01:26:28,522
and discuss the matter
like civilized people, hmm?

1725
01:26:30,148 --> 01:26:32,025
I want you to stop
<i>The Mousetrap.</i>

1726
01:26:32,192 --> 01:26:34,945
Oh, I am sorry, but
that I cannot do. No.

1727
01:26:35,404 --> 01:26:38,323
I'm afraid it goes against
everything I hold dear in life.

1728
01:26:38,949 --> 01:26:41,159
Yes. I'm a writer, you see.

1729
01:26:41,326 --> 01:26:44,621
I can't be told what to
write or what not to write.

1730
01:26:44,705 --> 01:26:47,624
It would be a denial
of one's freedom.

1731
01:26:48,667 --> 01:26:52,671
Do you see, Dennis?
Hmm? Do drink up.

1732
01:26:54,298 --> 01:26:56,592
(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

1733
01:27:18,030 --> 01:27:19,239
Oh, good God, Fellowes.

1734
01:27:20,949 --> 01:27:22,242
Get up. Get up.

1735
01:27:22,326 --> 01:27:23,869
Now, look here, young man, I...

1736
01:27:23,952 --> 01:27:25,704
- (GROUP GASPS)
- AGATHA: Max!

1737
01:27:27,372 --> 01:27:29,208
(SCREAMS)

1738
01:27:29,875 --> 01:27:30,876
(GLASS SHATTERS)

1739
01:27:31,502 --> 01:27:32,920
(INTENSE MUSIC CONTINUES)

1740
01:27:33,003 --> 01:27:34,004
(TIRE POPS)

1741
01:27:35,339 --> 01:27:37,007
(TIRES SCREECHING)

1742
01:27:47,059 --> 01:27:48,602
- Yes, good idea... Oh.
- MAX: Yes.

1743
01:27:48,685 --> 01:27:50,812
Oh, my God. Now what's happened?

1744
01:27:51,563 --> 01:27:53,732
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

1745
01:28:06,995 --> 01:28:08,539
- (AGATHA WHIMPERING)
- STOPPARD: Oh.

1746
01:28:09,581 --> 01:28:10,582
Dennis.

1747
01:28:12,751 --> 01:28:15,087
Put the popular author
down, please, Dennis.

1748
01:28:15,629 --> 01:28:16,922
- No.
- (GROANS)

1749
01:28:19,842 --> 01:28:20,968
(BOTTLE POPS OPEN)

1750
01:28:21,051 --> 01:28:23,595
Sheila, darling,
now's hardly the time.

1751
01:28:23,679 --> 01:28:25,556
SHEILA: Dickie, I need a light.

1752
01:28:25,639 --> 01:28:27,057
But you don't smoke.

1753
01:28:27,850 --> 01:28:29,184
(WHISPERS) Dickie.

1754
01:28:31,770 --> 01:28:33,730
(MUSIC INTENSIFYING)

1755
01:28:39,736 --> 01:28:40,737
(AGATHA SCREAMS)

1756
01:28:42,447 --> 01:28:43,699
(GROANING)

1757
01:28:44,491 --> 01:28:46,201
(GUN CLICKING)

1758
01:28:48,245 --> 01:28:49,246
(GRUNTING)

1759
01:28:52,833 --> 01:28:55,043
(MUSIC BUILDING UP)

1760
01:29:01,049 --> 01:29:02,593
- (GUNSHOT)
- (STALKER GRUNTS)

1761
01:29:02,676 --> 01:29:04,428
- (STOPPARD GROANS)
- (GUN COCKS)

1762
01:29:04,511 --> 01:29:05,596
STALKER: Look out!

1763
01:29:06,930 --> 01:29:07,973
STOPPARD: No, Dennis!

1764
01:29:08,056 --> 01:29:10,559
- (GRUNTING)
- Don't do it, please!

1765
01:29:11,226 --> 01:29:12,936
(AGATHA GRUNTS)

1766
01:29:14,897 --> 01:29:16,398
(GROWLING)

1767
01:29:16,481 --> 01:29:17,524
MAX: Darling!

1768
01:29:18,317 --> 01:29:20,611
- (AGATHA WHIMPERS)
- It's all right.

1769
01:29:20,694 --> 01:29:22,863
He's dead. It's over.

1770
01:29:26,450 --> 01:29:27,451
Sir...

1771
01:29:28,785 --> 01:29:29,912
I'm bleedin'.

1772
01:29:33,123 --> 01:29:36,835
Hang in there, Constable.
Sergeant's exam's in a month.

1773
01:29:37,503 --> 01:29:39,671
It's funny, sir. I actually...
I don't feel anything.

1774
01:29:39,755 --> 01:29:41,155
I think it mighta
just been a nick.

1775
01:29:41,215 --> 01:29:43,592
Yeah. Just the nick
of time, I'd say.

1776
01:29:43,675 --> 01:29:45,010
(CHUCKLES) Very good.

1777
01:29:45,093 --> 01:29:47,554
(CHUCKLES) I'm sorry, Constable.

1778
01:29:48,430 --> 01:29:50,557
I haven't been
altogether honest or open

1779
01:29:50,641 --> 01:29:52,935
or loyal or fair to
you as a partner.

1780
01:29:53,435 --> 01:29:56,813
Truth be told, I haven't been
a partner at all, you know.

1781
01:29:57,648 --> 01:29:58,875
Sir, you don't have to say that.

1782
01:29:58,899 --> 01:30:00,651
No, I want you to know...

1783
01:30:00,817 --> 01:30:02,152
I do trust you.

1784
01:30:02,236 --> 01:30:04,404
Thank you, sir. That
does mean a lot.

1785
01:30:04,488 --> 01:30:06,782
Um, but when I say that
I can't feel anything,

1786
01:30:06,865 --> 01:30:09,034
I think what I mean is that, um,

1787
01:30:09,576 --> 01:30:11,912
I don't think the
bullet hit me, sir.

1788
01:30:12,079 --> 01:30:13,121
What do you mean?

1789
01:30:14,164 --> 01:30:15,374
Did you, um...

1790
01:30:16,708 --> 01:30:18,752
STOPPARD: Oh, I see.
STALKER: Oh, no. Yeah.

1791
01:30:18,836 --> 01:30:20,796
Oh. Well, you're right
again, Constable.

1792
01:30:20,879 --> 01:30:21,922
Are you all right, sir?

1793
01:30:22,005 --> 01:30:23,399
I think you better
call an ambulance.

1794
01:30:23,423 --> 01:30:24,424
Yep.

1795
01:30:25,926 --> 01:30:27,928
Yes, I don't feel so good.

1796
01:30:29,805 --> 01:30:31,598
A shoot-out and a big explosion.

1797
01:30:32,099 --> 01:30:35,269
Perhaps it's for the best that
Mervyn wasn't alive to see it.

1798
01:30:36,395 --> 01:30:37,396
Quite.

1799
01:30:38,105 --> 01:30:40,440
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

1800
01:31:07,092 --> 01:31:08,260
(MUSIC ENDS)

1801
01:31:08,343 --> 01:31:11,096
It's okay, everyone,
I'm... I'm fine.

1802
01:31:11,889 --> 01:31:14,933
(FOLK SONG PLAYING)

1803
01:31:16,268 --> 01:31:20,480
LEO: <i>Now that's what I call
a Leo Kopernick ending.</i>

1804
01:31:22,232 --> 01:31:24,651
<i>But before we go
our separate ways,</i>

1805
01:31:24,735 --> 01:31:28,614
<i>you'll be wanting to know what
became of the heroes of this tale.</i>

1806
01:31:31,491 --> 01:31:33,702
<i>Constable Stalker,
as advertised,</i>

1807
01:31:33,785 --> 01:31:37,456
<i>sat her sergeant's exams
in the spring of 1953.</i>

1808
01:31:37,539 --> 01:31:40,209
(SONG CONTINUES PLAYING)

1809
01:31:40,292 --> 01:31:41,960
<i>She aced them.</i>

1810
01:31:44,087 --> 01:31:47,007
Detective Inspector
George Stoppard.

1811
01:31:47,466 --> 01:31:49,635
LEO: <i>Inspector
Stoppard was awarded</i>

1812
01:31:49,718 --> 01:31:53,138
<i>the King's Police and
Fire Services Medal.</i>

1813
01:31:53,222 --> 01:31:54,223
COMMISSIONER: Oh.

1814
01:31:54,306 --> 01:31:57,059
LEO: <i>Harrold Scott
received a Knighthood.</i>

1815
01:31:57,142 --> 01:31:59,645
(CAMERA FLASHBULB POPPING)

1816
01:32:00,812 --> 01:32:03,857
<i>The play, if you can believe it,</i>

1817
01:32:03,941 --> 01:32:06,777
<i>is still going strong
in London's West End.</i>

1818
01:32:07,986 --> 01:32:11,990
<i>Over 10 million people have
sat through</i> The Mousetrap.

1819
01:32:12,074 --> 01:32:13,700
TROTTER: Two brothers
who put their faith

1820
01:32:13,784 --> 01:32:15,410
in the British social services.

1821
01:32:16,620 --> 01:32:19,957
A sorry tale of abuse
that ended in tragedy.

1822
01:32:22,459 --> 01:32:27,256
Well, now that you've seen our film,
you are an accomplice to murder.

1823
01:32:27,422 --> 01:32:30,384
And so we ask you to remember that
it is very much in your interest

1824
01:32:30,467 --> 01:32:32,177
not to tell a soul
outside of this...

1825
01:32:32,261 --> 01:32:34,304
Shh. Sir. Sorry.

1826
01:32:34,388 --> 01:32:36,765
But I've missed the endin' once.

1827
01:32:36,849 --> 01:32:38,308
I don't wanna miss it again.

1828
01:32:38,392 --> 01:32:41,019
No, of course not.
I'm sorry. Sorry.

1829
01:32:44,231 --> 01:32:45,649
(SHUSHES SOFTLY)

1830
01:32:48,944 --> 01:32:50,153
(SONG ENDS)

1831
01:32:50,988 --> 01:32:52,948
{\an8}(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

1832
01:34:14,530 --> 01:34:16,532
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)