1
00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:10,867
我是西门庆，清河县人

2
00:01:10,938 --> 00:01:13,805
我一出生，就已经是个富家子弟

3
00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:16,066
我爹叫西门达

4
00:01:16,476 --> 00:01:19,104
我从来没有见过我爹干活

5
00:01:19,379 --> 00:01:21,847
他整天躲在书房里，不知道他在干什么

6
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,610
而且不准我进去

7
00:01:23,951 --> 00:01:27,978
除此以外，他就陪二娘和三娘到处玩

8
00:01:28,288 --> 00:01:31,724
还有，他吃的东西都只准他自己吃

9
00:01:31,792 --> 00:01:33,851
看…他拿着那条

10
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:35,691
我也不知道是什么东西

11
00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:38,762
他告诉我，祇有男人才可以吃

12
00:01:38,899 --> 00:01:40,833
小孩子不准吃的

13
00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:44,832
我看他吃得津津有味，很好吃的样子

14
00:01:45,339 --> 00:01:47,864
到底是不是真的那么好吃？

15
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:53,007
看，现在端起杯子的不是我二娘

16
00:01:53,347 --> 00:01:56,578
旁边拿调羹的，也不是我三娘

17
00:01:56,617 --> 00:01:57,584
说真的

18
00:01:57,618 --> 00:02:00,781
我也是今天早上才第一次见到她们俩

19
00:02:00,854 --> 00:02:02,685
不知道，我长大以后…

20
00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,758
会不会像我爹这样，吃这种东西？

21
00:02:06,893 --> 00:02:09,487
我爹从来不准我进书房

22
00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:11,929
他说，长大了才可以进去

23
00:02:12,032 --> 00:02:16,162
终于有一天，我忍不住偷偷跑进去

24
00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:18,598
原来里面有好多书

25
00:02:18,672 --> 00:02:20,139
还有很多一条条泡在酒里

26
00:02:20,507 --> 00:02:21,735
不知道是什么来的

27
00:02:21,775 --> 00:02:24,801
有的应该是爹每天早上吃的东西

28
00:02:24,845 --> 00:02:27,712
还有，墙上画了许多不穿衣服的人

29
00:02:27,781 --> 00:02:30,011
但不知道他们在做什么的画

30
00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:37,050
后来，我才知道…

31
00:02:37,124 --> 00:02:40,025
原来爹是宋代的性学专家

32
00:02:40,060 --> 00:02:41,823
他打破了礼教的约束

33
00:02:41,862 --> 00:02:44,831
努力追求人类应有的性享受

34
00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:51,132
虽然如此，我爹还是一个情种

35
00:02:51,405 --> 00:02:53,839
他对我娘的感情，一直都很好

36
00:02:53,907 --> 00:02:58,037
可惜，娘很年轻就染上了不治之症

37
00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:05,079
我娘很漂亮，是一个大美人

38
00:03:05,152 --> 00:03:06,813
她病了很久

39
00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:10,254
但是，爹依然每晚都在床边哄她开心

40
00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:11,923
陪她说话

41
00:03:12,059 --> 00:03:13,651
直到有一天的晚上

42
00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:25,167
相公，不要难过

43
00:03:25,906 --> 00:03:28,067
我的时间到了

44
00:03:28,475 --> 00:03:30,773
我没办法治好夫人的病

45
00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:32,673
觉得好惭愧

46
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:36,573
我这一生能够享受到

47
00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:39,517
世间女子得不到的I闺房欢乐

48
00:03:39,686 --> 00:03:41,278
已经很满足

49
00:03:43,757 --> 00:03:47,284
你走了以后，我会终生不娶

50
00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:53,229
那么庆儿不用再给人欺负

51
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,791
我有个要求…

52
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:59,895
祇要做得到，我一定答应你

53
00:04:00,507 --> 00:04:02,270
给我最后一次

54
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:04,703
去到极乐境界

55
00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:07,005
但你现在的体力，恐怕…

56
00:04:07,214 --> 00:04:09,614
给我，我要

57
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,871
我现在用回魂针

58
00:04:40,013 --> 00:04:43,915
在半个时辰内，会令你回光反照

59
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:46,245
但是以后…

60
00:08:19,132 --> 00:08:23,296
我早就知道，你一直躲在门口偷看

61
00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:26,865
你娘已经去世

62
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:28,406
你跟我来

63
00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:47,389
你爹花了一生的时间

64
00:08:47,827 --> 00:08:51,092
去钻研男女间阴阳之道的真谛

65
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:56,165
等你长大以后，爹就会全部传授给你

66
00:08:57,404 --> 00:09:00,896
但是这种事，在世俗人的眼中

67
00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:03,340
是属于邪恶和不道德

68
00:09:03,410 --> 00:09:05,605
书房里的所有事情

69
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:09,411
除了你我，不要跟第三者说

70
00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:10,438
明白吗？

71
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:12,007
明白

72
00:09:13,186 --> 00:09:16,417
自古以来，就已经有《素女经》

73
00:09:16,856 --> 00:09:19,416
教授男女交合之道

74
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,222
这里的春宫图

75
00:09:21,327 --> 00:09:24,421
内有交合姿态九十九式

76
00:09:24,464 --> 00:09:27,524
你日后就会慢慢体会到

77
00:09:28,468 --> 00:09:29,628
爹

78
00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:32,501
怎样才能令她们满足？

79
00:09:32,539 --> 00:09:34,029
问得好

80
00:09:34,174 --> 00:09:37,337
要令她们满足，是有很多学问

81
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:40,038
包括身体的强壮度

82
00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:43,545
以及阳物的硬度、持久度

83
00:09:43,783 --> 00:09:46,513
但是最重要是“攻心”这两个字

84
00:09:46,786 --> 00:09:48,151
攻心？

85
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:50,883
一个女人如果爱你的话

86
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:53,489
你在房中与她交合时

87
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,358
就会将强度放大三倍

88
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,260
做一柱香的时间

89
00:09:58,298 --> 00:10:00,630
她就有了三柱香的满足

90
00:10:00,967 --> 00:10:03,561
那怎样才能让女人爱我？

91
00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:07,239
其实男女之道与兵法一样

92
00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:10,504
所谓知己知彼，百战百胜

93
00:10:15,148 --> 00:10:19,380
御女之术，武功占很重要的地位

94
00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:24,280
一个男人要武功好，要打败敌人

95
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:27,383
就一定要拳脚够硬

96
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:32,929
要打败女人，令她对你死心塌地

97
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:35,429
要做到这个境界…

98
00:10:35,835 --> 00:10:38,429
就要练到阳物够硬

99
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:41,265
硬得像铁一样

100
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:42,634
怎么练？

101
00:10:42,876 --> 00:10:45,470
先练掌上压，每日一千次

102
00:10:48,548 --> 00:10:49,674
指上压！

103
00:10:49,983 --> 00:10:52,508
成功之后就练指上压

104
00:10:56,556 --> 00:10:57,682
根上压！

105
00:10:58,091 --> 00:11:00,184
最后就练根上压

106
00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:08,197
爹，你的洞好深呀

107
00:11:10,537 --> 00:11:14,029
祇要你用功练习，一年后

108
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:16,268
你的洞就会跟我一样深

109
00:11:37,463 --> 00:11:39,693
老爹天天要我苦练阳物

110
00:11:39,933 --> 00:11:41,601
我很快就有成绩了

111
00:11:41,601 --> 00:11:43,466
但是，他一直不让我找个女人

112
00:11:43,636 --> 00:11:45,331
来试我的第一次

113
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:48,772
他告诉我，男人的第一次很重要

114
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:52,739
如果感觉不好，一生都会有阴影

115
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,508
庆儿，你可以开始了

116
00:11:58,484 --> 00:11:59,678
是！

117
00:12:00,687 --> 00:12:04,680
我很快长大了，我可以用阳物写大字

118
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:08,325
而对性的渴望，也越来越大

119
00:12:54,307 --> 00:12:55,638
司琴

120
00:12:57,410 --> 00:12:59,503
进来                  是，官人

121
00:13:00,713 --> 00:13:03,238
我想要…来吧

122
00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:05,380
官人，不要

123
00:13:05,418 --> 00:13:08,251
我一直想抓一个丫环进房，给自己破处

124
00:13:08,321 --> 00:13:10,380
可是老爹看得很紧

125
00:13:10,423 --> 00:13:11,583
官人，我…                  庆儿！

126
00:13:11,658 --> 00:13:14,821
一发现就当头棒喝，不成全好事

127
00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:16,188
爹

128
00:13:18,264 --> 00:13:19,629
你出去！

129
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,764
你又来了，我说过多少次…

130
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,640
男人第一次性经验很重要

131
00:13:29,709 --> 00:13:33,167
效果不好，会影响你一生的心理

132
00:13:33,546 --> 00:13:35,810
一定要我批准才可以做，知道吗？

133
00:13:36,115 --> 00:13:37,446
知道了，爹

134
00:13:39,585 --> 00:13:41,485
我被老爹痛骂一顿后

135
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:43,317
以为今年休想甩掉

136
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:45,151
处男.’  这两个字

137
00:13:45,224 --> 00:13:46,816
没想到世事难料

138
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:48,320
很多时候都是意想不到

139
00:13:48,361 --> 00:13:51,296
过了几天，老爹说他有一个世交的女儿

140
00:13:51,364 --> 00:13:53,264
因为家里出事，怕受到牵连

141
00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:56,632
所以，暂时搬来我们家暂住

142
00:14:06,813 --> 00:14:09,509
老爹说，她叫紫烟

143
00:14:09,615 --> 00:14:13,711
我见到她，整个人都快冒烟

144
00:14:45,151 --> 00:14:48,450
紫烟是我一生中见过最美最美的女子

145
00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:50,456
自从她来到我家以后

146
00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:53,391
我无时无刻都想扑过去强奸她

147
00:14:53,526 --> 00:14:56,295
但是老爹时刻都牢牢盯着我

148
00:14:56,295 --> 00:15:00,459
他说她是世伯的女儿，碰都甭想碰

149
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:01,234
爹

150
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,135
带他走

151
00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:03,261
是

152
00:15:04,103 --> 00:15:05,832
不好意思，少爷

153
00:15:09,308 --> 00:15:10,832
庆儿吃饭

154
00:15:10,877 --> 00:15:12,208
这么快？

155
00:15:14,113 --> 00:15:17,378
没办法，我祇好天天躲在房里自己搞定

156
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,885
不然的话，我想我一定会爆炸

157
00:15:20,319 --> 00:15:23,914
关关雎鸠，在河之洲

158
00:15:24,190 --> 00:15:27,557
窈窕淑女，君子好逑

159
00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:30,425
后来，老爹还要紫烟教我读书

160
00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:31,963
搞到我差点发疯

161
00:15:32,231 --> 00:15:35,689
窈窕淑女，寤寐求之

162
00:15:35,735 --> 00:15:39,432
求之不得，寤寐思服

163
00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:43,498
悠哉悠哉，辗转反侧

164
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:48,736
关关雎鸠，在河之洲

165
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:54,481
窈窕淑女，君子好逑

166
00:15:58,224 --> 00:16:01,751
你读一遍给我听吧

167
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:05,693
读…读…

168
00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:09,924
关关之洲，在河雎鸠

169
00:16:10,269 --> 00:16:11,964
窈窕淑女…

170
00:16:12,238 --> 00:16:13,933
你亲我鸠鸠…

171
00:16:15,675 --> 00:16:18,508
你说什么？

172
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:22,546
关…关…鸠…鸠…

173
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:26,416
干嘛脸红红的？

174
00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:27,952
你不舒服？

175
00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,616
关…关…

176
00:16:33,259 --> 00:16:34,590
紫烟姐！

177
00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:41,363
没压疼你吧？

178
00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:43,796
你起来吧

179
00:16:45,271 --> 00:16:47,000
对不起                  你真调皮

180
00:16:47,273 --> 00:16:48,740
不好意思

181
00:16:59,986 --> 00:17:02,682
我一定要得到紫烟，我一定要得到她

182
00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:04,985
我要她做我第一个女人！

183
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:20,590
那晚，我自己搞了九次

184
00:18:20,666 --> 00:18:22,657
还是很冲动

185
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:25,795
突然间，让我听到一把声音…

186
00:18:25,838 --> 00:18:28,170
小姐，热水已经准备好

187
00:18:28,507 --> 00:18:30,065
你可以洗澡了

188
00:18:30,343 --> 00:18:32,504
这几句话，听在我耳朵里

189
00:18:32,578 --> 00:18:34,409
就像仙女唱歌一样

190
00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:35,641
我立刻跳下床

191
00:18:35,715 --> 00:18:38,809
悄悄走近我预先挖穿的小洞前

192
00:21:35,628 --> 00:21:39,029
原来紫烟和我一样，喜欢自己搞自己

193
00:21:39,064 --> 00:21:41,862
为何两个有需要的人，不能互相抚慰

194
00:21:41,934 --> 00:21:43,265
而要自己搞自己？

195
00:21:43,769 --> 00:21:45,134
简直荒谬！

196
00:21:45,204 --> 00:21:47,764
不行，我实在忍无可忍

197
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:18,025
不要害羞

198
00:22:18,970 --> 00:22:20,335
那我不客气了

199
00:22:20,371 --> 00:22:21,599
来

200
00:23:19,030 --> 00:23:20,292
我要…

201
00:23:20,331 --> 00:23:21,593
等等

202
00:24:15,987 --> 00:24:17,648
很大！

203
00:24:18,356 --> 00:24:19,653
是吗？

204
00:25:17,048 --> 00:25:19,482
那晚，我们整整做了五次

205
00:25:19,517 --> 00:25:21,280
大家都很满足

206
00:25:21,352 --> 00:25:24,253
从那晚开始，我们不放过任何一个机会

207
00:25:24,288 --> 00:25:26,518
在家里任何一个没人见到的地方

208
00:25:26,590 --> 00:25:28,649
我们就做…做…

209
00:25:28,759 --> 00:25:31,227
做我们人生中最快乐的事

210
00:26:44,602 --> 00:26:47,662
我好爱你…真的好爱你

211
00:26:47,705 --> 00:26:49,195
我也是

212
00:26:49,373 --> 00:26:52,399
我一生都要和你在一起

213
00:26:53,210 --> 00:26:55,974
你真的很大…我受不了…

214
00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:57,304
你知不知道自己很大？

215
00:26:57,381 --> 00:27:00,407
我知道…大…很大…

216
00:27:00,751 --> 00:27:03,720
我要你做我最后一个男人…好不好？

217
00:27:04,155 --> 00:27:12,654
好…最后一个男人…最后一个…

218
00:27:12,730 --> 00:27:15,631
没有你，我宁愿死…

219
00:27:16,133 --> 00:27:17,157
不要…不要呀…

220
00:27:17,234 --> 00:27:18,792
怎么了？你不要？

221
00:27:19,136 --> 00:27:20,694
干嘛停下？      你死了我怎么办？

222
00:27:20,805 --> 00:27:22,363
来吧

223
00:27:23,340 --> 00:27:25,831
要死…我也要跟你一起死…

224
00:27:31,682 --> 00:27:32,876
这一个月里

225
00:27:32,917 --> 00:27:35,818
紫烟教会我很多男女之间的秘密

226
00:27:35,886 --> 00:27:37,911
原来她是一个高手

227
00:27:38,155 --> 00:27:39,918
我已经深深的爱上她了

228
00:27:40,157 --> 00:27:43,354
没想到，来到那个月初一的早晨…

229
00:27:43,427 --> 00:27:45,861
我发现紫烟不见了

230
00:27:45,930 --> 00:27:48,763
前一晚，我们还做了三次

231
00:27:51,635 --> 00:27:53,899
庆，我走了

232
00:27:54,371 --> 00:27:57,772
你是个好男人，你很疼我

233
00:27:58,209 --> 00:28:01,440
我在这一个月里，真的很快乐

234
00:28:01,479 --> 00:28:04,004
因为我感觉到，你是真心的

235
00:28:04,415 --> 00:28:08,647
我已经很久没遇到一个真心的男人

236
00:28:09,653 --> 00:28:13,589
可是我跟你说的一切都是骗你的

237
00:28:13,724 --> 00:28:16,454
你的阳物并不是很大

238
00:28:16,594 --> 00:28:18,892
我见过不少更大的

239
00:28:19,363 --> 00:28:23,299
我不可能一辈子跟你在一起

240
00:28:23,334 --> 00:28:27,065
因为我祇是秦淮河畔的一个妓女

241
00:28:27,438 --> 00:28:29,030
是你爹请我回来

242
00:28:29,306 --> 00:28:31,934
为你当男女之事的启蒙

243
00:28:32,309 --> 00:28:36,803
其实男女之间，大多是虚情假意

244
00:28:36,847 --> 00:28:40,408
你这辈子都不要把心交给任何一个女子

245
00:28:40,484 --> 00:28:43,612
还是你去伤害人家比较好

246
00:28:52,429 --> 00:28:54,989
我故意要你先受一次伤害

247
00:28:55,566 --> 00:28:59,058
以后，你就不会被情所困

248
00:28:59,336 --> 00:29:01,827
男人祇要有钱，有权势

249
00:29:01,872 --> 00:29:04,033
天下美女都会归你

250
00:29:04,308 --> 00:29:06,572
不要浪费时间在女人身上

251
00:29:06,610 --> 00:29:09,977
要全力去争取权力和财富

252
00:29:10,281 --> 00:29:12,715
紫烟是我花一百两黄金找回来的

253
00:29:12,783 --> 00:29:13,943
很值得

254
00:29:13,984 --> 00:29:15,781
这比起一百个老师来教你更强

255
00:29:15,986 --> 00:29:17,886
更会让你记住

256
00:29:20,257 --> 00:29:21,884
爹…

257
00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:24,118
孩儿明白了

258
00:29:25,296 --> 00:29:28,754
孩子，要努力读书

259
00:29:29,366 --> 00:29:34,133
祇要有财势官职，天下绝色都会得到

260
00:29:34,405 --> 00:29:37,806
不然，只会跟许多穷人一样

261
00:29:37,841 --> 00:29:40,605
一生只对着一个丑的女人

262
00:29:41,312 --> 00:29:44,110
爹，我不要丑的女人

263
00:29:45,282 --> 00:29:47,011
我要考取功名

264
00:29:47,685 --> 00:29:51,052
我要天下女子都跪在我脚下！

265
00:29:51,422 --> 00:29:54,084
被老爹教训一顿之后，我恍然大悟

266
00:29:54,358 --> 00:29:56,451
决定出外游学，见多点世面

267
00:29:56,527 --> 00:29:59,826
最重要还是想结交多些天下美女

268
00:29:59,863 --> 00:30:02,559
庆儿，紧记爹教你的御女之术

269
00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:06,058
你这次出门，若物色到好女子

270
00:30:06,303 --> 00:30:07,736
可以回来告诉爹

271
00:30:07,771 --> 00:30:10,467
让我帮你提亲，成家立室

272
00:30:10,708 --> 00:30:13,074
孩儿紧记爹的吩咐

273
00:30:15,779 --> 00:30:19,112
时候不早了，快启程吧

274
00:30:19,383 --> 00:30:20,714
孩儿告辞

275
00:30:26,991 --> 00:30:28,151
我才不笨

276
00:30:28,392 --> 00:30:30,485
这么快找个老婆来绑住自己？

277
00:30:30,561 --> 00:30:32,791
我要享尽天下美女，然后才成亲

278
00:30:35,499 --> 00:30:36,625
快走，竹竿

279
00:30:36,900 --> 00:30:38,925
少爷，等我…

280
00:30:42,439 --> 00:30:45,772
离家之后，我就海阔天空到处遨游

281
00:30:45,809 --> 00:30:48,801
游遍名山大川，寻幽探秘

282
00:30:48,846 --> 00:30:52,009
可惜，所见到的都是庸脂俗粉

283
00:30:52,082 --> 00:30:55,074
直到有一天，我和竹竿到了一座荒山

284
00:30:55,386 --> 00:30:57,752
没想到遇上滂沱大雨

285
00:30:57,821 --> 00:30:58,947
我挺不住了

286
00:30:59,023 --> 00:31:01,685
竹竿…竹…竹竿…

287
00:31:30,554 --> 00:31:32,078
师姐

288
00:31:37,494 --> 00:31:39,086
他们死了？

289
00:31:41,131 --> 00:31:43,065
他们还有气！

290
00:31:46,603 --> 00:31:50,130
发高烧，不救他们一定会死

291
00:31:50,741 --> 00:31:52,003
他们是男人

292
00:31:52,042 --> 00:31:54,203
师父说过，男人是毒蛇

293
00:31:54,445 --> 00:31:56,072
碰不得，连看一眼也不行

294
00:31:56,146 --> 00:31:58,080
不然，就会咬死我们

295
00:31:58,449 --> 00:31:59,541
是的…

296
00:31:59,583 --> 00:32:01,073
师父好像不是这样说的

297
00:32:01,151 --> 00:32:02,743
她说男人身上有条毒蛇

298
00:32:02,886 --> 00:32:05,218
会走出来咬死我们才对

299
00:32:06,957 --> 00:32:09,687
我认为先救人

300
00:32:10,427 --> 00:32:12,554
救人一命，胜造七级浮屠

301
00:32:12,663 --> 00:32:14,255
救了回去再算吧

302
00:32:19,036 --> 00:32:19,970
怎么样…

303
00:32:19,970 --> 00:32:21,767
师父出来了…

304
00:32:26,977 --> 00:32:29,207
师父，那两位施主怎么样？

305
00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:30,777
他们没事吧？

306
00:32:30,881 --> 00:32:33,873
他们染上风寒，所以发高烧

307
00:32:33,984 --> 00:32:35,747
我已经给他们吃了药

308
00:32:35,853 --> 00:32:36,887
出身汗

309
00:32:36,887 --> 00:32:38,980
明天就没事了

310
00:32:39,089 --> 00:32:40,181
菩萨保佑

311
00:32:40,491 --> 00:32:41,788
我告诉妳们

312
00:32:41,859 --> 00:32:43,850
这两位施主是男人

313
00:32:43,894 --> 00:32:47,990
除了师父，妳们不准接近禅房半步

314
00:32:48,031 --> 00:32:49,089
为什么？

315
00:32:49,133 --> 00:32:51,226
男人都是老虎的化身

316
00:32:51,468 --> 00:32:53,060
身上都有一条毒蛇

317
00:32:53,203 --> 00:32:54,602
会出来咬死妳们

318
00:32:54,705 --> 00:32:55,706
毒蛇？

319
00:32:55,706 --> 00:32:57,674
被毒蛇咬到，非死不可

320
00:32:57,808 --> 00:32:58,797
而且还要下地狱

321
00:32:58,842 --> 00:33:00,139
妳们要切记

322
00:33:01,245 --> 00:33:02,906
是，师父

323
00:33:03,013 --> 00:33:04,844
回去休息吧

324
00:33:05,482 --> 00:33:07,313
明月，你过来

325
00:33:07,551 --> 00:33:08,643
来

326
00:33:09,219 --> 00:33:13,019
你是大师姐，要好好看管小师妹

327
00:33:13,056 --> 00:33:15,684
不要让她们偷偷走过来

328
00:33:15,793 --> 00:33:16,987
明月知道了

329
00:33:24,034 --> 00:33:26,229
太好了，可以休息了

330
00:33:26,737 --> 00:33:28,227
妳们有没有发现？                    什么？

331
00:33:28,505 --> 00:33:31,235
师父最近有点胡涂      我说师父在撒谎

332
00:33:31,508 --> 00:33:33,135
师父以前说男人是毒蛇

333
00:33:33,177 --> 00:33:34,667
现在却说是老虎

334
00:33:34,745 --> 00:33:36,235
师父前言不对后语

335
00:33:36,513 --> 00:33:38,242
师父可能在骗我们

336
00:33:38,549 --> 00:33:40,676
她自己可能也没见过

337
00:33:40,818 --> 00:33:42,945
是呀…

338
00:33:47,090 --> 00:33:48,148
妳们好大胆

339
00:33:48,258 --> 00:33:51,386
对师父无礼，在背后说亵渎的话

340
00:33:51,762 --> 00:33:52,786
我要去告诉师父！

341
00:33:52,930 --> 00:33:55,296
不要，大师姐，我们以后不敢了

342
00:33:55,566 --> 00:33:57,932
妳们一定是动了凡心

343
00:33:58,769 --> 00:34:01,704
说不定半夜会去找毒蛇老虎

344
00:34:02,873 --> 00:34:05,899
不行，今晚我要锁住妳们

345
00:34:07,177 --> 00:34:08,701
怎么办…

346
00:34:09,680 --> 00:34:12,308
她会不会去告诉师父？

347
00:34:12,683 --> 00:34:14,708
她真的把门锁住了

348
00:34:47,351 --> 00:34:51,185
师父说男人身上有毒蛇，在哪里？

349
00:34:53,690 --> 00:34:57,251
弄醒他，毒蛇会不会咬我？

350
00:35:44,741 --> 00:35:46,868
这条毒蛇很大

351
00:35:46,944 --> 00:35:48,935
软绵绵的…

352
00:35:50,814 --> 00:35:52,975
是不是睡着了？

353
00:36:27,351 --> 00:36:29,114
糟了！毒蛇喷毒汁了！

354
00:36:29,186 --> 00:36:31,313
我中毒了…

355
00:36:36,026 --> 00:36:38,256
我的小祖宗…

356
00:36:43,300 --> 00:36:44,961
菩萨

357
00:36:45,369 --> 00:36:47,963
明月真的不知道自己…

358
00:36:48,705 --> 00:36:52,072
是否已经犯了清规，要下地狱去？

359
00:36:53,076 --> 00:36:55,442
其实，我什么也没做过

360
00:36:55,479 --> 00:37:00,075
我只不过好奇，所以才来看他

361
00:37:00,417 --> 00:37:03,386
其实明月根本就…

362
00:37:03,754 --> 00:37:05,381
不是很想出家

363
00:37:06,056 --> 00:37:07,523
明月很小的时候

364
00:37:07,758 --> 00:37:10,158
父母因瘟疫得病双双去世

365
00:37:10,193 --> 00:37:12,184
只剩下我一个人

366
00:37:13,063 --> 00:37:15,998
幸得师父慈悲为怀，收留了我

367
00:37:16,299 --> 00:37:19,291
所以我就做了小尼姑

368
00:37:20,070 --> 00:37:21,594
其实我…

369
00:37:22,406 --> 00:37:25,102
很想回到凡尘俗世

370
00:37:25,208 --> 00:37:28,143
菩萨，我大胆的说一句

371
00:37:28,211 --> 00:37:30,577
师父说的话都不是真的

372
00:37:30,914 --> 00:37:33,906
男人不但不是毒蛇和老虎

373
00:37:34,184 --> 00:37:39,053
相反，我觉得他们身上的毒蛇还挺可爱

374
00:37:41,124 --> 00:37:43,388
那位公子看来…

375
00:37:43,794 --> 00:37:45,523
也很英俊

376
00:37:47,030 --> 00:37:52,161
不知为何，祇要我见到他就会好开心

377
00:37:52,302 --> 00:37:56,136
我真想知道，为何会这样子

378
00:37:57,207 --> 00:37:58,936
菩萨…

379
00:38:00,110 --> 00:38:05,639
我想求你，令那位公子见到我的时候…

380
00:38:05,916 --> 00:38:07,611
也像我见到他一样的开心

381
00:38:07,884 --> 00:38:09,215
可不可以？

382
00:38:12,556 --> 00:38:14,217
罪过…  罪过…

383
00:38:20,230 --> 00:38:21,663
你怎么样？

384
00:38:22,999 --> 00:38:24,557
你没事吧？

385
00:38:25,035 --> 00:38:27,162
我没事，施主

386
00:38:27,237 --> 00:38:28,534
你醒了？

387
00:38:28,972 --> 00:38:30,166
是的

388
00:38:30,474 --> 00:38:32,442
是菩萨叫醒我

389
00:38:32,843 --> 00:38:35,641
叫我来这里听你刚刚说那番话

390
00:38:37,247 --> 00:38:39,374
我没说什么…

391
00:38:39,416 --> 00:38:43,318
还有，菩萨告诉我，叫我见到你…

392
00:38:43,353 --> 00:38:46,254
要跟你见到我一样的开心

393
00:38:59,102 --> 00:39:00,160
少爷！

394
00:39:00,237 --> 00:39:03,263
少爷，你在哪里？

395
00:39:04,374 --> 00:39:05,966
又是你？

396
00:39:06,076 --> 00:39:08,442
少爷，我刚才被那小尼姑踩了一脚

397
00:39:08,545 --> 00:39:10,376
现在好痛

398
00:39:10,447 --> 00:39:12,381
少爷，你理理我吧，我好痛

399
00:39:12,449 --> 00:39:13,473
她怎样踩你？

400
00:39:13,550 --> 00:39:15,177
我刚才在那边被她推倒

401
00:39:15,352 --> 00:39:16,683
接着她就一脚踩过来

402
00:39:16,987 --> 00:39:18,318
是不是这样！

403
00:39:18,388 --> 00:39:19,582
是呀…

404
00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:22,154
就是这样，你怎么知道？

405
00:39:22,292 --> 00:39:23,486
我的小祖宗

406
00:39:28,865 --> 00:39:31,197
过了两天，不管我如何装病

407
00:39:31,268 --> 00:39:33,361
老尼姑还是下了逐客令

408
00:39:33,403 --> 00:39:35,394
我和竹竿唯有离开

409
00:39:35,438 --> 00:39:38,407
我打听到那个偷看我的小尼姑叫明月

410
00:39:39,042 --> 00:39:41,306
她的名字真美

411
00:39:41,411 --> 00:39:43,709
可惜，我再也见不到她了

412
00:39:43,980 --> 00:39:48,041
所以，我祇好收拾心情，继续上路

413
00:39:48,652 --> 00:39:50,313
不用送了

414
00:39:52,622 --> 00:39:53,557
快走吧

415
00:39:53,557 --> 00:39:55,149
知道了，少爷

416
00:39:55,625 --> 00:39:59,117
我万万没想到，明月竟然会…

417
00:39:59,196 --> 00:40:01,130
偷偷地离开尼姑庵

418
00:40:01,198 --> 00:40:02,399
追上来找我

419
00:40:02,399 --> 00:40:04,162
她心里已经决定了

420
00:40:04,234 --> 00:40:06,668
重投凡尘俗世，要和我在一起

421
00:40:07,003 --> 00:40:08,095
我还痛

422
00:40:08,138 --> 00:40:09,230
怎样痛？

423
00:40:09,439 --> 00:40:11,202
扯…扯痛

424
00:40:11,241 --> 00:40:12,606
切掉它就不痛了！

425
00:40:12,642 --> 00:40:14,576
不切…

426
00:40:14,678 --> 00:40:16,475
能走…走得很快…

427
00:40:36,066 --> 00:40:37,499
三位大哥…

428
00:40:39,169 --> 00:40:42,161
可有见过两位公子…  从这儿经过？

429
00:40:42,205 --> 00:40:43,502
没有…

430
00:40:43,673 --> 00:40:45,106
谢谢

431
00:40:52,482 --> 00:40:56,111
刚才那小子，皮嫩肉滑…

432
00:40:56,186 --> 00:40:59,485
看样子…  不大像是男人

433
00:41:00,690 --> 00:41:03,215
我敢肯定，是个女的

434
00:41:27,017 --> 00:41:28,507
少爷，走慢点

435
00:41:35,525 --> 00:41:36,753
小兄弟！

436
00:41:39,596 --> 00:41:41,223
等一等

437
00:41:42,599 --> 00:41:44,590
我想起来了

438
00:41:44,668 --> 00:41:45,760
你见过他们？

439
00:41:46,036 --> 00:41:47,765
刚刚有两位公子问路

440
00:41:48,038 --> 00:41:52,099
他们说要到那边山神庙上香

441
00:41:52,642 --> 00:41:57,341
他死里逃生，去烧香答谢神恩是对的

442
00:41:58,581 --> 00:41:59,843
怎么去？

443
00:42:00,150 --> 00:42:01,845
就在那边，很近

444
00:42:02,352 --> 00:42:03,286
很近？

445
00:42:03,286 --> 00:42:05,311
好人做到底，我带你去

446
00:42:05,455 --> 00:42:08,151
来，走吧                  谢谢

447
00:42:08,425 --> 00:42:10,416
走                  好，走

448
00:42:11,027 --> 00:42:13,461
等会儿到了怡红院，就找几个妞来玩玩

449
00:42:13,596 --> 00:42:14,722
也叫一个给你玩

450
00:42:14,764 --> 00:42:17,790
好的，但是我下面还痛着呢

451
00:42:21,371 --> 00:42:22,895
怎么了，少爷？

452
00:42:26,276 --> 00:42:27,709
我少了样东西

453
00:42:27,811 --> 00:42:29,472
很简单，你自己翻

454
00:42:29,512 --> 00:42:30,706
蹲下

455
00:42:40,323 --> 00:42:41,654
不见了？

456
00:42:43,393 --> 00:42:44,826
不见了什么？

457
00:42:45,095 --> 00:42:46,562
爹给我的那本书

458
00:42:46,796 --> 00:42:49,697
很简单，回去叫老爷再给你一本

459
00:42:50,367 --> 00:42:51,698
你懂个屁！

460
00:42:51,768 --> 00:42:54,430
这是一本医书，是秘籍

461
00:42:55,372 --> 00:42:58,671
还想着进了小镇，买点补药补一补

462
00:42:59,509 --> 00:43:00,806
医书？

463
00:43:01,778 --> 00:43:04,474
难道留在尼姑庵里？

464
00:43:08,385 --> 00:43:10,751
我早就知道，走

465
00:43:11,688 --> 00:43:13,952
少爷，等等我

466
00:43:14,524 --> 00:43:16,754
你把东西都翻出来了，等我呀

467
00:43:16,793 --> 00:43:17,817
少爷…

468
00:43:22,499 --> 00:43:24,524
救命呀！

469
00:43:24,567 --> 00:43:25,435
有声音？

470
00:43:25,435 --> 00:43:27,665
是啊，好像有姑娘喊救命

471
00:43:29,706 --> 00:43:30,798
走开！坏蛋…

472
00:43:30,874 --> 00:43:31,775
闭嘴！

473
00:43:31,775 --> 00:43:32,799
住手！

474
00:43:34,377 --> 00:43:35,366
去死吧！

475
00:43:35,745 --> 00:43:36,769
死吧！

476
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:53,763
怎么这样硬？

477
00:43:55,703 --> 00:43:57,102
这叫铁裆功，蠢蛋！

478
00:43:57,138 --> 00:43:58,127
厉害吧！

479
00:44:02,644 --> 00:44:03,668
起来

480
00:44:03,878 --> 00:44:05,470
走开，坏蛋！

481
00:44:06,881 --> 00:44:09,213
我来救你的，姑娘

482
00:44:13,988 --> 00:44:14,977
闪开！

483
00:44:23,398 --> 00:44:25,798
又踢中我的小祖宗…      明月  ！

484
00:44:27,669 --> 00:44:29,000
没事了

485
00:44:30,071 --> 00:44:32,665
别怕…

486
00:44:32,974 --> 00:44:34,805
坏人都跑了

487
00:44:38,713 --> 00:44:41,876
明月，不要哭

488
00:44:42,450 --> 00:44:45,214
不要哭，现在没事了

489
00:44:45,920 --> 00:44:49,583
告诉我，你为何跟那些坏人在一起？

490
00:44:51,459 --> 00:44:53,051
我不知道…

491
00:44:53,461 --> 00:44:56,191
我从尼姑庵出来，想跟你一起走

492
00:44:57,999 --> 00:45:00,661
跟你去看看这个世界

493
00:45:03,871 --> 00:45:06,032
没想到，被他们骗了…

494
00:45:06,074 --> 00:45:08,668
若不是你来救我，我就…

495
00:45:08,876 --> 00:45:10,275
别说了

496
00:45:18,152 --> 00:45:20,643
我跟你一起走可以吗？

497
00:45:22,757 --> 00:45:24,918
不可以？

498
00:45:28,963 --> 00:45:30,260
没问题

499
00:45:44,612 --> 00:45:46,807
有人理一下我吗？

500
00:45:46,881 --> 00:45:48,781
好痛呀

501
00:46:40,601 --> 00:46:41,898
你干嘛？

502
00:46:42,937 --> 00:46:44,336
你真调皮

503
00:46:44,605 --> 00:46:47,597
别跑，明月…

504
00:46:47,708 --> 00:46:50,108
做梦也会被人踩？

505
00:46:53,948 --> 00:46:56,212
你还跑，看你往哪跑

506
00:46:57,752 --> 00:46:59,344
跑吧…

507
00:46:59,987 --> 00:47:01,181
你别过来

508
00:47:01,255 --> 00:47:03,018
我偏要过来

509
00:47:05,526 --> 00:47:07,221
看你往哪跑

510
00:47:09,263 --> 00:47:11,788
你欺负人

511
00:53:03,951 --> 00:53:07,682
明月，让你这样舒服，你如何报答我？

512
00:53:09,056 --> 00:53:11,081
你来亲我下面

513
00:53:12,359 --> 00:53:13,724
来

514
00:53:17,932 --> 00:53:20,059
别害羞，来

515
00:53:26,106 --> 00:53:28,370
这条毒蛇是不是很可爱？

516
00:53:30,311 --> 00:53:33,109
亲亲它，没有毒的

517
00:54:10,517 --> 00:54:12,576
不要，我怕

518
00:54:12,620 --> 00:54:15,817
没什么好怕，你还不知道怎样做

519
00:54:16,090 --> 00:54:18,183
我们慢慢来，好吗？

520
00:54:18,726 --> 00:54:21,354
就是不知道才害怕

521
00:54:21,428 --> 00:54:22,554
那就让我来教你吧

522
00:54:22,630 --> 00:54:26,430
刚开始会有点痛，但以后你会很快乐

523
00:54:26,500 --> 00:54:27,660
怎样快乐？

524
00:54:27,735 --> 00:54:31,296
就是让你觉得，再痛十倍也值得的快乐

525
00:54:41,248 --> 00:54:43,614
这个，就是除了尼姑…

526
00:54:43,751 --> 00:54:45,446
女人都要经过的阶段

527
00:54:45,552 --> 00:54:47,520
你就忍忍吧！

528
00:54:48,188 --> 00:54:50,452
我裂开了…

529
00:54:50,624 --> 00:54:55,084
我现在是在帮你开启快乐的泉源

530
00:55:08,542 --> 00:55:11,807
任何女人，都会被人骗了第一次

531
00:55:12,179 --> 00:55:15,410
要不然，以后就不会快乐了

532
00:56:54,148 --> 00:56:56,912
那一夜，我们断断续续做了六次

533
00:56:56,950 --> 00:56:59,646
因为明月，她的确是第一次

534
00:56:59,753 --> 00:57:01,778
做久了她就会痛

535
00:57:02,423 --> 00:57:04,857
她是一个令我很快乐的女子

536
00:57:04,892 --> 00:57:07,360
所以，我当她是我的女人

537
00:57:07,394 --> 00:57:10,386
但没多久，我就收到老爹病重的讯息

538
00:57:10,697 --> 00:57:12,927
我带明月回家见老爹

539
00:57:13,200 --> 00:57:14,895
老爹确实病得很重

540
00:57:15,169 --> 00:57:17,637
我骗他叙述月是南方的富家千金

541
00:57:17,771 --> 00:57:18,965
他病得一塌糊涂

542
00:57:19,206 --> 00:57:20,366
我说什么他都信以为真

543
00:57:20,474 --> 00:57:23,932
还催我快点成亲，我唯有顺其美意

544
00:57:50,838 --> 00:57:54,934
从今日起，你就成家立室了

545
00:57:55,509 --> 00:57:57,943
爹送一件宝物给你

546
00:58:04,184 --> 00:58:06,049
爹，什么来的？

547
00:58:06,386 --> 00:58:08,616
是我花了千两黄金

548
00:58:08,856 --> 00:58:11,689
搜罗天下所有珍贵药材…

549
00:58:11,758 --> 00:58:15,888
精心提炼秘制而成的腾龙秘丸

550
00:58:15,963 --> 00:58:18,397
我现在送给你傍身

551
00:58:18,465 --> 00:58:20,057
祇要服食一粒

552
00:58:20,267 --> 00:58:22,758
就算是百岁老人也可以…

553
00:58:22,803 --> 00:58:25,499
有气力御女生子

554
00:58:25,572 --> 00:58:29,599
不过，千万不可以贪恋欢乐

555
00:58:29,643 --> 00:58:33,773
服食多过一粒，就会过度虚耗

556
00:58:33,847 --> 00:58:36,543
有脱阳而死的危险

557
00:58:36,650 --> 00:58:38,083
庆儿知道了

558
00:58:41,221 --> 00:58:43,485
那一夜，我就吃了第一粒

559
00:58:43,557 --> 00:58:46,025
明月差点在洞房之夜被我搞死

560
00:58:46,260 --> 00:58:48,785
她来了六十多次，我射了八次

561
00:58:48,896 --> 00:58:51,421
到第三天，我们才肯起床

562
00:58:54,902 --> 00:58:57,598
我结婚，本是想给老爹冲喜

563
00:58:57,704 --> 00:59:00,537
但他的病反而更严重

564
00:59:00,574 --> 00:59:03,509
一个月之后，就离开了我们

565
00:59:08,015 --> 00:59:11,007
爹死了之后，我继承了他的一切

566
00:59:11,285 --> 00:59:14,413
包括良田数千亩，家财万贯

567
00:59:14,454 --> 00:59:17,912
我成为真正的西门大官人，富甲一方

568
00:59:18,025 --> 00:59:19,492
我与老爹不同

569
00:59:19,526 --> 00:59:22,017
他只懂得躲在家里读书和研究

570
00:59:22,262 --> 00:59:23,524
而我留学之后

571
00:59:23,564 --> 00:59:25,794
明白到有财之外还要有势

572
00:59:25,832 --> 00:59:27,993
从此我就结交有势力的朋友

573
00:59:28,302 --> 00:59:29,564
希望找一个官来做

574
00:59:29,603 --> 00:59:31,730
更加与有势力的官员勾结

575
00:59:31,805 --> 00:59:33,739
这样，才可以横行霸道

576
00:59:33,807 --> 00:59:35,968
祇有我欺负人，没人敢欺负我

577
00:59:36,810 --> 00:59:37,902
请

578
00:59:38,679 --> 00:59:41,147
这天，我就与新结交的损友花子虚

579
00:59:41,415 --> 00:59:44,043
一起前往县中比较有钱的王大户府第

580
00:59:44,351 --> 00:59:46,717
参加他宴请新上任的知府大人

581
00:59:47,588 --> 00:59:50,614
今日我代表各位清河县的好朋友

582
00:59:50,791 --> 00:59:52,622
敬县大爷一杯

583
00:59:52,826 --> 00:59:54,521
祝官运亨通

584
00:59:54,661 --> 00:59:56,458
百福盈门！

585
00:59:57,598 --> 00:59:58,792
好…

586
00:59:58,899 --> 01:00:00,730
今日本官新上任

587
01:00:00,801 --> 01:00:02,701
大家若想平平安安…

588
01:00:02,736 --> 01:00:04,795
就要与本官通力合作

589
01:00:04,938 --> 01:00:06,838
多多关照

590
01:00:07,608 --> 01:00:09,542
不行…好闷呀

591
01:00:09,576 --> 01:00:10,941
闷什么？

592
01:00:11,545 --> 01:00:13,911
请你看看，找遍全场…

593
01:00:13,981 --> 01:00:15,676
都找不到一个象样点的

594
01:00:15,749 --> 01:00:17,740
不闷才怪，还有…

595
01:00:17,818 --> 01:00:19,911
你看后面那堆  极品.’

596
01:00:22,356 --> 01:00:23,653
将就一下吧

597
01:00:23,757 --> 01:00:25,748
好不容易才能弄到两个位子进来

598
01:00:25,792 --> 01:00:27,157
谢谢你

599
01:00:52,653 --> 01:00:53,779
金莲！

600
01:00:58,425 --> 01:01:00,188
谁让这个小妖精端酒出来？

601
01:01:00,627 --> 01:01:01,992
别这样，不好看                  她是谁？

602
01:01:02,062 --> 01:01:04,530
什么不好看，我现在骂错了她吗？

603
01:01:04,598 --> 01:01:05,997
她不过十三四岁

604
01:01:06,066 --> 01:01:08,057
走起路来却像只狐狸精

605
01:01:08,468 --> 01:01:11,232
现在已经如此，长大以后还行？

606
01:01:11,605 --> 01:01:13,800
她那细皮肉嫩的脸

607
01:01:13,874 --> 01:01:16,502
被那泼妇一巴一巴地打…

608
01:01:16,576 --> 01:01:19,545
真是打在她脸上，痛在我心上

609
01:01:19,813 --> 01:01:23,078
不仅如此，你看她那对小脚…

610
01:01:23,116 --> 01:01:25,812
小巧玲珑，勾魂摄魄

611
01:01:25,952 --> 01:01:28,045
真是越看越喜欢                  是的

612
01:01:28,121 --> 01:01:30,817
可惜…                  可惜…

613
01:01:34,394 --> 01:01:36,658
原来这个婢女名叫金莲

614
01:01:36,697 --> 01:01:38,255
王夫人因为她长得美

615
01:01:38,532 --> 01:01:40,762
而王大户早就对她有野心

616
01:01:40,834 --> 01:01:43,200
那天晚上就借故打她

617
01:01:43,837 --> 01:01:47,204
在我心里，就祇有  可惜.’  两个字

618
01:01:52,713 --> 01:01:54,180
后来，我喝醉了

619
01:01:54,448 --> 01:01:57,042
就留在王大户府第，没有回家

620
01:01:57,084 --> 01:01:59,609
我半夜醒来，反正睡不着

621
01:01:59,686 --> 01:02:01,586
就走到后院逛逛

622
01:02:01,655 --> 01:02:03,054
那一夜，月色很美

623
01:02:03,156 --> 01:02:06,717
我一直走，走到河边

624
01:02:06,760 --> 01:02:07,886
不料…

625
01:02:17,604 --> 01:02:18,935
是你？

626
01:02:27,180 --> 01:02:28,909
你哭呀？

627
01:02:28,982 --> 01:02:30,279
怎么了？

628
01:02:30,550 --> 01:02:33,747
夫人刚才打我，不让我吃饭

629
01:02:33,787 --> 01:02:35,584
我太饿了，就出来喝水

630
01:02:35,689 --> 01:02:37,554
这样才不觉得饿

631
01:02:37,657 --> 01:02:39,750
只喝水怎么会饱？

632
01:02:39,893 --> 01:02:41,952
来，我房里有些糕点

633
01:02:41,995 --> 01:02:43,257
你跟我来

634
01:02:43,597 --> 01:02:45,758
夫人知道，会打死我的

635
01:02:45,832 --> 01:02:47,094
我不说，她怎会知道？

636
01:02:47,134 --> 01:02:50,103
况且，这总比饿着肚子好，对吧？

637
01:02:50,504 --> 01:02:51,869
来，快点，跟我来

638
01:02:51,905 --> 01:02:54,135
来，走吧

639
01:02:59,813 --> 01:03:02,805
来，喝杯茶

640
01:03:08,221 --> 01:03:11,315
大官人，别这样看着我

641
01:03:11,558 --> 01:03:14,857
没有，我在欣赏你的小脚

642
01:03:15,529 --> 01:03:17,963
这对脚是我奶奶从小给我扎的

643
01:03:18,131 --> 01:03:19,723
原来如此

644
01:03:20,901 --> 01:03:23,995
如果我跟你老爷说，将你赎身过来给我

645
01:03:24,070 --> 01:03:25,230
你愿不愿意？

646
01:03:25,272 --> 01:03:26,739
真的？

647
01:03:27,707 --> 01:03:29,902
其实，你在这儿不开心吧？

648
01:03:31,011 --> 01:03:34,742
夫人不喜欢我，常借故打我

649
01:03:34,915 --> 01:03:38,783
你长得美，夫人当然不喜欢你

650
01:03:39,252 --> 01:03:40,742
大官人…

651
01:03:40,787 --> 01:03:43,620
你…真的肯给我赎身？

652
01:03:43,690 --> 01:03:44,816
当然

653
01:03:44,958 --> 01:03:47,893
五百两，够不够？

654
01:03:48,995 --> 01:03:50,758
不过这样…

655
01:03:51,131 --> 01:03:53,122
我要你答应我的要求

656
01:03:56,069 --> 01:03:58,401
你别误会，不是那意思

657
01:03:58,672 --> 01:04:01,197
你还小，我怎会那么残忍

658
01:04:01,274 --> 01:04:02,866
我祇是想…

659
01:04:04,077 --> 01:04:06,011
看看你的小脚

660
01:05:49,783 --> 01:05:51,876
这块玉佩，是我送给你的信物

661
01:05:51,918 --> 01:05:54,318
我回去，就马上拿银两来替你赎身

662
01:05:54,354 --> 01:05:55,480
你等我

663
01:06:11,304 --> 01:06:13,795
这么多美女，我今天晚上当皇帝了

664
01:06:13,840 --> 01:06:16,104
没这样的派场，怎敢介绍

665
01:06:16,309 --> 01:06:17,469
你真有办法

666
01:06:17,711 --> 01:06:20,305
我把赎金莲的银两全给你做订金

667
01:06:20,380 --> 01:06:23,508
如果不好玩，我就阉了你

668
01:06:23,817 --> 01:06:26,217
包你满意

669
01:06:41,000 --> 01:06:43,195
这位就是雁夫人

670
01:06:44,603 --> 01:06:48,004
夫人有礼，在下西门庆

671
01:06:48,407 --> 01:06:51,171
我听说，西门大官人一向风流倜傥

672
01:06:51,243 --> 01:06:54,212
身边有无数婴宛，享尽人间艳福

673
01:06:54,280 --> 01:06:58,114
为何会有兴趣光顾我凤翔山庄？

674
01:06:58,617 --> 01:07:02,451
本人闻说凤翔山庄能够令天下男人…

675
01:07:02,521 --> 01:07:05,115
得到他一生中最大的满足

676
01:07:05,324 --> 01:07:07,724
如果不行，就原银奉还

677
01:07:07,993 --> 01:07:10,655
所以今天专诚来拜会拜会

678
01:07:10,930 --> 01:07:14,457
我们的确做到，不过有两个条件

679
01:07:14,633 --> 01:07:15,998
什么条件？

680
01:07:16,035 --> 01:07:19,664
第一，要验你的阳物，证明你没病

681
01:07:21,307 --> 01:07:23,434
第二就是要立生死状

682
01:07:23,509 --> 01:07:26,342
你试过以后，绝不可以向世上任何人…

683
01:07:26,412 --> 01:07:28,073
泄露享乐的程序

684
01:07:28,147 --> 01:07:30,115
若不然，我们会顾用…

685
01:07:30,149 --> 01:07:32,743
天下最厉害的杀手取你的人头

686
01:07:33,452 --> 01:07:36,683
骥北何家大公子，蜀中唐家十一少

687
01:07:37,056 --> 01:07:41,152
他们两位少爷，都是半夜丢了人头

688
01:07:41,227 --> 01:07:43,252
本人并不是吃饱就唱之徒

689
01:07:43,362 --> 01:07:45,557
所以请夫人放心，放心

690
01:07:45,598 --> 01:07:47,759
好，艳春，函雀

691
01:07:48,067 --> 01:07:49,091
是

692
01:07:50,636 --> 01:07:52,729
你俩现在请西门大官人…

693
01:07:53,072 --> 01:07:54,767
进内堂验一下有没有暗病

694
01:07:59,478 --> 01:08:00,446
给钱

695
01:08:00,446 --> 01:08:01,674
是

696
01:08:05,084 --> 01:08:08,451
夫人，约签了，钱给了

697
01:08:08,654 --> 01:08:10,781
验过我下面也没有暗病

698
01:08:11,123 --> 01:08:12,647
何时可以开始享乐？

699
01:08:12,691 --> 01:08:14,056
还不行

700
01:08:14,460 --> 01:08:15,688
为什么？

701
01:08:15,728 --> 01:08:19,562
这里的规矩是一天之内只招待一位客人

702
01:08:19,598 --> 01:08:21,793
我们今天晚上的客人是花公子

703
01:08:22,067 --> 01:08:23,830
官人，请你明天再来吧

704
01:08:25,271 --> 01:08:26,795
两个一起不行吗？

705
01:08:27,339 --> 01:08:29,534
请官人守这里的规矩

706
01:08:29,608 --> 01:08:32,406
若不然，我们宁愿不做你的生意

707
01:08:33,145 --> 01:08:34,703
不好意思

708
01:08:38,284 --> 01:08:39,717
你这混蛋耍我？

709
01:08:39,985 --> 01:08:41,748
失陪了，送客

710
01:08:42,321 --> 01:08:44,289
夫人…

711
01:08:45,024 --> 01:08:46,286
花子虚！

712
01:08:47,526 --> 01:08:49,323
请                  请

713
01:09:01,106 --> 01:09:02,733
花子虚这家伙真可恶

714
01:09:03,008 --> 01:09:04,771
害我半天吊，还要一个人走

715
01:09:05,077 --> 01:09:06,237
我一定会报仇

716
01:09:06,278 --> 01:09:07,745
见到你老婆就搞你老婆

717
01:09:08,047 --> 01:09:09,537
见到你老妈就搞你老妈

718
01:09:09,581 --> 01:09:11,742
搞完你老婆再搞你老妈…

719
01:09:12,751 --> 01:09:14,184
这位公子…

720
01:09:14,219 --> 01:09:17,484
你一个人在这里走，很危险的

721
01:09:18,157 --> 01:09:19,454
这里有老虎吗？

722
01:09:19,491 --> 01:09:22,153
老虎没有，但是有凶恶的山贼

723
01:09:22,227 --> 01:09:23,387
山贼？

724
01:09:24,730 --> 01:09:26,527
哪有那么多山贼？

725
01:09:26,565 --> 01:09:30,331
当然有，就是闻风丧胆的黑风寨

726
01:09:30,402 --> 01:09:32,267
这里不是祇有凤翔山庄吗？

727
01:09:32,371 --> 01:09:35,169
什么凤翔山庄？我没听过

728
01:09:35,274 --> 01:09:36,605
我刚刚才去过

729
01:09:37,343 --> 01:09:39,368
我看公子也是富贵人家

730
01:09:39,411 --> 01:09:42,278
你快走吧，遇到山贼就没命了

731
01:09:42,381 --> 01:09:44,872
这里官府势力很大，我看…

732
01:09:45,217 --> 01:09:47,276
毛贼倒有几个，山贼…

733
01:09:47,386 --> 01:09:48,410
我才不怕

734
01:10:16,782 --> 01:10:19,216
山贼…

735
01:10:21,420 --> 01:10:22,614
出暗器？

736
01:10:33,532 --> 01:10:34,897
妳们干什么？

737
01:10:35,134 --> 01:10:36,158
别乱来！

738
01:10:36,201 --> 01:10:37,429
我是清河县西门大官人

739
01:10:37,469 --> 01:10:39,437
我给妳们钱，放了我

740
01:10:39,471 --> 01:10:42,235
这么多废话，吵什么？

741
01:10:42,875 --> 01:10:44,433
揍你一顿再拿钱也不迟

742
01:10:44,510 --> 01:10:46,705
谁在大吵大闹？

743
01:10:46,745 --> 01:10:49,305
寨主…                  寨主…

744
01:10:50,716 --> 01:10:51,774
脱掉他的裤子

745
01:10:52,117 --> 01:10:53,641
我想看看他的东西有多大

746
01:10:53,719 --> 01:10:56,279
别说我不先提醒你，小心吓坏

747
01:10:57,456 --> 01:11:00,448
想不到你居然有点份量

748
01:11:00,526 --> 01:11:02,289
我纵横脂粉界这么多年

749
01:11:02,327 --> 01:11:04,795
有哪个女子不在我胯下低头

750
01:11:04,830 --> 01:11:06,388
是吗？

751
01:11:06,598 --> 01:11:08,498
那我们就赌一把

752
01:11:08,534 --> 01:11:09,660
赌什么？

753
01:11:09,735 --> 01:11:11,498
赌你那条东西

754
01:11:12,471 --> 01:11:13,699
怎样赌？

755
01:11:13,739 --> 01:11:15,707
就是你要跟本寨主交欢

756
01:11:15,741 --> 01:11:18,710
你搞到我满足了，本寨主就放人

757
01:11:18,744 --> 01:11:20,871
不然，我就切下你的东西煲汤

758
01:11:21,213 --> 01:11:23,477
分给大家喝，怎样？

759
01:11:23,549 --> 01:11:27,246
事到如今，没有其它办法脱身，赌吧

760
01:11:27,286 --> 01:11:28,344
好

761
01:11:29,354 --> 01:11:30,514
放马过来！

762
01:11:36,361 --> 01:11:37,521
关门

763
01:11:38,697 --> 01:11:40,824
寨主…

764
01:11:45,838 --> 01:11:49,467
你说来就来！

765
01:11:51,443 --> 01:11:56,506
自盘古开天辟地开始

766
01:11:57,683 --> 01:12:05,488
男人要女人乖乖躺下，张开双腿…

767
01:12:05,958 --> 01:12:10,395
也要全力以赴

768
01:12:10,796 --> 01:12:17,565
用武力，逼女人就范

769
01:12:18,203 --> 01:12:22,037
否则，就用技巧…

770
01:12:22,407 --> 01:12:26,468
令她心甘情愿

771
01:12:31,550 --> 01:12:34,075
你…要考我武功？

772
01:12:34,319 --> 01:12:40,724
那就要看看…你有多少斤两

773
01:12:50,836 --> 01:12:52,394
双乳还可以

774
01:13:16,895 --> 01:13:18,453
臀部也不错

775
01:13:24,636 --> 01:13:25,864
爽不爽？

776
01:13:29,575 --> 01:13:30,735
过瘾吧？

777
01:13:30,776 --> 01:13:32,573
你很厉害

778
01:13:32,778 --> 01:13:34,075
厉害吧？

779
01:13:36,582 --> 01:13:37,879
好功夫！

780
01:13:44,056 --> 01:13:46,581
听闻大官人好功夫

781
01:13:47,626 --> 01:13:49,594
我今天终于领教了

782
01:13:50,329 --> 01:13:51,990
果然名不虚传

783
01:13:52,030 --> 01:13:53,657
雁夫人？

784
01:13:57,936 --> 01:14:00,404
原来你俩串通一起来耍我！

785
01:14:00,439 --> 01:14:01,906
好不好玩？

786
01:14:03,041 --> 01:14:06,408
难怪玩过之后不可向外界泄露

787
01:14:06,712 --> 01:14:09,112
以后要玩就找我，不收钱

788
01:14:12,751 --> 01:14:15,686
我在凤翔山庄渡过毕生难忘的经历之后

789
01:14:15,721 --> 01:14:17,188
忽然，我想起金莲

790
01:14:17,422 --> 01:14:19,720
于是马上到王大户府上，想替她赎身

791
01:14:19,758 --> 01:14:20,918
没想到…

792
01:14:21,026 --> 01:14:22,755
请问有什么事？

793
01:14:22,794 --> 01:14:25,592
夫人，我今天来是想替金莲赎身

794
01:14:25,697 --> 01:14:29,463
真对不起，金莲实在太妖野了

795
01:14:29,534 --> 01:14:31,434
前天我老爷硬把她拉进房间

796
01:14:31,570 --> 01:14:32,594
差点搞出事

797
01:14:32,638 --> 01:14:34,731
留她在这里，我怎能安心？

798
01:14:34,806 --> 01:14:37,775
为免除后患，我没办法不这样做

799
01:14:37,876 --> 01:14:39,901
我已经把她送给别人了

800
01:14:40,012 --> 01:14:41,809
那…送给谁？

801
01:14:41,880 --> 01:14:44,872
抱歉，我答应对方要守秘密

802
01:14:44,916 --> 01:14:46,645
所以不能告诉你

803
01:14:47,119 --> 01:14:49,679
那…告辞了

804
01:14:49,888 --> 01:14:52,721
想不到，我与金莲有缘无份

805
01:14:52,791 --> 01:14:55,589
迟来三天，我就再找不到她

806
01:14:55,627 --> 01:14:57,151
这可能是天意

807
01:14:57,396 --> 01:14:59,057
很快，我就忘了这件事

808
01:15:02,367 --> 01:15:04,927
那天晚上，我终于回到家

809
01:15:04,970 --> 01:15:10,806
在睡房门口，我听到月娘在房里呻吟

810
01:15:27,626 --> 01:15:30,618
我怀疑她勾引家仆，给我戴绿帽子

811
01:15:30,696 --> 01:15:32,527
原来她这么大胆

812
01:15:54,886 --> 01:15:56,854
她居然到我爹的房里

813
01:15:56,922 --> 01:16:00,517
偷了一根最长的  角先生.’  出来玩

814
01:16:00,625 --> 01:16:04,994
都是我不好，很久没给她一顿饱餐

815
01:16:05,997 --> 01:16:07,521
我也加入

816
01:16:08,767 --> 01:16:10,257
相公…

817
01:16:12,437 --> 01:16:15,133
可不可以…一起？

818
01:19:23,662 --> 01:19:25,323
那天晚上，我用了老爹留下的

819
01:19:25,630 --> 01:19:26,961
十二根  角先生.’

820
01:19:27,032 --> 01:19:28,727
月娘她很开心

821
01:19:28,800 --> 01:19:30,859
说好久没吃得那么饱

822
01:19:30,969 --> 01:19:34,336
也好，没有金莲，就留在家里慰妻

823
01:19:34,639 --> 01:19:36,834
我渐渐忘记了金莲

824
01:19:36,875 --> 01:19:39,435
而且，我还认识了好多女孩子

825
01:19:39,744 --> 01:19:42,042
这几年来，我越来越有钱

826
01:19:42,113 --> 01:19:43,307
越来越有地位

827
01:19:43,348 --> 01:19:46,909
就算逛街，也有很多女子向我抛媚眼

828
01:19:47,218 --> 01:19:49,083
但不是谁也合适

829
01:19:49,120 --> 01:19:50,951
我有个干妈，叫王婆

830
01:19:50,989 --> 01:19:54,288
她专门帮我物色绝色佳丽，穿针引线

831
01:19:54,392 --> 01:19:57,361
我渐渐对容易得到手的女子失去兴趣

832
01:19:57,429 --> 01:19:59,260
要有难度，才有满足感

833
01:19:59,297 --> 01:20:00,491
你是谁？

834
01:20:00,765 --> 01:20:01,959
对不起

835
01:20:06,271 --> 01:20:08,068
没关系…

836
01:20:10,241 --> 01:20:12,072
是他…

837
01:20:19,918 --> 01:20:22,819
在下西门庆，如何称呼？

838
01:20:22,887 --> 01:20:25,355
官人，你不认得我了？

839
01:20:26,424 --> 01:20:29,018
你是…

840
01:20:29,060 --> 01:20:31,824
糟，难道我跟她有过一路不记得？

841
01:20:31,863 --> 01:20:33,524
不可能，这么漂亮…

842
01:20:34,299 --> 01:20:35,857
你是？

843
01:20:36,001 --> 01:20:37,400
金莲

844
01:20:37,435 --> 01:20:38,527
金莲？！

845
01:20:43,808 --> 01:20:45,537
金莲？长这么大了？

846
01:20:45,777 --> 01:20:46,937
金莲！

847
01:20:51,816 --> 01:20:52,840
你这么早回来？

848
01:20:52,884 --> 01:20:53,908
过来

849
01:20:53,952 --> 01:20:55,146
他…他是谁？

850
01:20:55,220 --> 01:20:56,517
你说谁呀？

851
01:20:56,821 --> 01:20:58,812
谁？他呀

852
01:21:00,225 --> 01:21:02,284
我刚才开窗掉了根棍子

853
01:21:02,360 --> 01:21:05,352
不小心，差点打中他

854
01:21:06,164 --> 01:21:08,029
不好意思，对不起…

855
01:21:08,066 --> 01:21:09,465
我老婆有没有打中你？

856
01:21:10,035 --> 01:21:11,559
没有…

857
01:21:14,406 --> 01:21:17,170
对了，我有事，先走了

858
01:21:17,909 --> 01:21:19,900
棍子…  还给你

859
01:21:20,245 --> 01:21:21,269
告辞

860
01:21:21,312 --> 01:21:22,609
慢走

861
01:21:22,647 --> 01:21:23,909
慢走

862
01:21:24,416 --> 01:21:25,440
干嘛？

863
01:21:25,483 --> 01:21:26,541
他有没有搞你？

864
01:21:26,985 --> 01:21:28,475
当然没有！

865
01:21:28,753 --> 01:21:31,244
你脑袋整天想着歪事

866
01:21:55,380 --> 01:21:57,245
干儿子呀

867
01:21:57,882 --> 01:21:59,247
喂！

868
01:22:01,453 --> 01:22:04,422
谁那么有本事，将你的魂魄勾走？

869
01:22:04,456 --> 01:22:07,914
一进门就走来走去，坐立不安

870
01:22:08,026 --> 01:22:11,427
你到底有何心事，连干妈也丢在一边？

871
01:22:11,529 --> 01:22:12,553
我没事呀

872
01:22:12,797 --> 01:22:15,288
不过我在街上，遇见一位朋友

873
01:22:15,400 --> 01:22:16,662
是老相好？

874
01:22:17,135 --> 01:22:18,602
什么老相好呀

875
01:22:18,837 --> 01:22:21,499
若是老相好，就不会牵肠挂肚了

876
01:22:21,873 --> 01:22:24,034
是个从未相好过的姑娘

877
01:22:24,142 --> 01:22:26,303
刚认识时，她还很小

878
01:22:26,344 --> 01:22:28,972
现在长大了，我一见到她…

879
01:22:29,147 --> 01:22:31,240
心都动了

880
01:22:33,151 --> 01:22:36,211
我本来想介绍一个新的干女儿给你

881
01:22:36,254 --> 01:22:38,484
但是呢，现在人家呢…

882
01:22:38,523 --> 01:22:41,424
心都动了，心有所属了

883
01:22:41,559 --> 01:22:42,651
还介绍来干嘛

884
01:22:42,861 --> 01:22:45,352
干妈，你说什么？我怎么会呢？

885
01:22:45,430 --> 01:22:48,558
我西门庆何时对美女冷淡过？

886
01:22:49,134 --> 01:22:50,624
就介绍给我认识吧

887
01:22:50,869 --> 01:22:52,461
来吧

888
01:22:52,604 --> 01:22:55,402
好，就相信你这一次

889
01:22:55,440 --> 01:22:58,637
乖女儿，还不快出来见大官人？

890
01:23:05,517 --> 01:23:07,109
金莲！

891
01:23:09,220 --> 01:23:11,984
干儿子，对不起…

892
01:23:12,056 --> 01:23:13,182
我这里很干净

893
01:23:13,224 --> 01:23:16,193
不可以做出伤风败德的事

894
01:23:20,632 --> 01:23:22,497
这样行了吧？

895
01:23:38,249 --> 01:23:40,149
不行…

896
01:23:41,619 --> 01:23:43,314
你不想我吗？

897
01:23:43,354 --> 01:23:47,051
武大郎天生好嫉，虽然出外卖烧饼

898
01:23:47,125 --> 01:23:49,616
但他每隔一个时辰就会回来

899
01:23:51,062 --> 01:23:53,690
他见不到我，就会大吵大闹

900
01:23:53,898 --> 01:23:56,093
所以我不能出来太久

901
01:23:56,167 --> 01:23:57,691
那我岂不很辛苦？

902
01:23:57,969 --> 01:23:59,493
你晚上来我家…

903
01:23:59,537 --> 01:24:02,005
武大郎他除了梦游…

904
01:24:02,073 --> 01:24:04,405
就敲锣打鼓也不会醒

905
01:24:05,076 --> 01:24:06,373
那我…

906
01:24:07,178 --> 01:24:09,146
我今天晚上二更来找你…

907
01:24:09,380 --> 01:24:10,745
好不好？

908
01:24:30,235 --> 01:24:31,497
他来了

909
01:24:35,940 --> 01:24:37,407
小心

910
01:24:47,051 --> 01:24:49,281
金莲，我好想你

911
01:24:49,320 --> 01:24:51,220
我也是                  你可知道…

912
01:24:52,523 --> 01:24:54,184
他睡着了？

913
01:24:54,425 --> 01:24:57,189
睡着了，敲锣打鼓也不会醒

914
01:24:57,228 --> 01:24:59,196
除非是鸡啼

915
01:24:59,497 --> 01:25:00,794
那就好了

916
01:25:01,032 --> 01:25:03,728
现在是二更，何时才到鸡啼

917
01:25:03,968 --> 01:25:05,458
我们还等什么？

918
01:26:06,397 --> 01:26:09,491
不用管他，他梦游罢了

919
01:27:01,486 --> 01:27:02,646
怕了你

920
01:27:20,171 --> 01:27:21,365
继续

921
01:28:18,000 --> 01:28:20,161
你好厉害呀

922
01:28:20,603 --> 01:28:22,935
我就是这么厉害，你喜欢吗？

923
01:28:36,886 --> 01:28:38,820
老婆，你在搞什么？

924
01:28:38,854 --> 01:28:40,412
你刚才梦游

925
01:28:40,689 --> 01:28:42,156
把人家按在神?上…

926
01:28:42,258 --> 01:28:44,249
差点被你搞死

927
01:28:44,627 --> 01:28:46,185
我有那么厉害？

928
01:28:47,062 --> 01:28:49,428
你不厉害，谁厉害呢？

929
01:28:49,765 --> 01:28:50,699
那再来一次

930
01:28:50,699 --> 01:28:52,894
与金莲这一次，令我毕生难忘

931
01:28:52,968 --> 01:28:54,299
我决定要得到她

932
01:28:54,370 --> 01:28:58,067
就算要做出伤天害理的事，我也愿意

933
01:29:02,011 --> 01:29:03,444
武大郎那天晚上梦游之后

934
01:29:03,712 --> 01:29:05,976
受了风寒，卧床不起

935
01:29:06,015 --> 01:29:09,815
我看准时机，就在他的药里下毒

936
01:30:27,363 --> 01:30:29,331
武大郎死了以后

937
01:30:29,365 --> 01:30:34,166
西门庆就正式收金莲做他的第二房妻子

938
01:30:34,269 --> 01:30:37,261
从此，西门大官人…

939
01:30:37,373 --> 01:30:41,366
就开始肆无忌惮的荒淫生活

940
01:30:41,443 --> 01:30:46,005
成为真正的一代淫魔


