这杯酒单宁丰富 你会在你的味蕾后部品尝到更浓郁的花香
Lots of tannins, and you'll notice the more floral notes on the back of your palate.
嗯 味蕾后部 没错
Mm, back of the palate, yeah.
不过我就想要一个能让我喝的烂醉的酒
But I'm looking for something that's gonna get me fucked up.
你明白我的意思吗
You know what I'm sayin'?
也许我该带你看看我们的科尼亚克白兰地
Uh, perhaps I should point you to our cognac section.
也许吧 听起来不错
Perhaps. Yeah, that sounds good.
好的 谢谢
Yeah, thank you.
这上面都写了老顽固 怎么会是好白人[白葡萄酒]
How can it be a nice white and it says bigots?
这写的是博若莱
This is a Beaujolais.
我觉得你对葡萄酒一窍不通
I don't think you know shit about wine.
这边是贵重的
This is where the expensive--
在啤酒葡萄酒店 他们有个专门的冰箱放他们的酒
At the beer and wine store, they got a cooler for they fuckin' wine.
好吧 如果你想去啤酒葡萄酒店的话 你就去他们的店好了
Well, then go to the beer and wine store if you wanna go to the beer and wine store.
我正要去呢
That's where I'm going.
我现在要请你离开 你该走了
I'm gonna ask you to leave now. I'm gonna ask you to leave.
我告诉你 你最好把你的脏手拿开 别碰我
I'll tell you what, you better get your fuckin' hands off me.
我要把你的头砍下来 贱人 你可说不好我是个什么人
I'll cut your fuckin' head off, bitch. You don't know me.
Bruce叔叔
Uncle Bruce?
侄子
Nephew!
怎么了 伙计
What's up, man?
你在这里做什么
What you doin' up in here?
你在这里做什么
What you doin' up here?
你知道的 我想试着变得像你一样
You know, I'm trying to get like you.
你怎么拿着个Key Food的购物篮
Why do you have a Key Foods basket?
嘿 你的问题可不少啊 侄子
Hey, man, you got a lot of questions, Nephew.
听着 伙计 我很高兴今天碰到你了
Listen, man, I'm just glad I ran into you.
要想找你叙叙旧可不容易啊 大忙人
You're a hard man to catch up with, bud.
是啊 你知道 我一直在到处旅游
Yeah, you know, I've been traveling a whole lot.
- 你的号码是什么?-我的手机丢了
- What's your number? - I just lost my phone.
撒谎
You lyin'.
我坐过山车的时候 手机从窗户飞出去 在半空中爆炸了
I was on a roller coaster, flew out the window, exploded mid-air.
-你得小心点 伙计 -没错 没错
- You gotta be careful like that, man. - That's right, that's right.
但是听着
But listen,
我这有个赚钱的好主意
I got a business opportunity,
我想让你一开始就参与进来
and I only want you in on the ground floor.
我不确定这是不是个好主意 我是说 我可能会拖你后腿
I don't know if that's a good idea. I mean, I'd probably hold you back.
-我写了一部电影 -电影
- I wrote a film. - A film?
没错 精彩极了
Yes, and it's dynamite!
我很乐意读读你的剧本 但是 你知道的 我是法定的盲人
I would love to read your script, but, you know, I'm legally blind.
电影叫《内鬼人》
It's called "Werecoon."
-《内鬼人》 -对 《内鬼人》
- "Werecoon"? - Yes, "Werecoon."
就像狼人一样 但是主角是个内鬼
Like a werewolf, but he's a coon.
你知道吗
You know what?
我觉得你刚刚把我的眼睛治好了
I feel like you just gave me my vision back.
砰 看看我拿的是什么
Boom! Look what I got right here, baby.
我的天呐
Oh, my God. Yeah, no.
你知道吗 也许我有那么一点空闲时间
You know what, maybe I do got a little bit of time...
跟我最喜欢的叔叔一起度过
With my favorite uncle.
让我们开一瓶这里的酒
Let's crack open one of these bottles.
给我们拿几个塑料杯子
Hey, Frenchie, bring us some plastic cups.
我们要在这待一会
We gon' be here for a minute.
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, let me hear you say ♪
♪ Your folks, my folks ♪
♪ My folks, your folks ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah! ♪
♪ Ha! ♪
哪一个感觉更糟
被白人叫黑鬼
还是被黑人叫内鬼
哦 这两个差远了
Oh, it's not even close.
被白人叫黑鬼我已经不会生气了
Nigga by a White person doesn't bother me at all.
到了这一步这就是懒得想什么新花样了
That's--that's just lazy writing at this point.
“黑鬼” 行吧 好受伤哦
"Nigga." Okay, ohh.
被黑人叫内鬼 哦 那是直击灵魂的伤害
A "coon" by a Black person-ooh, that hurts your soul.
你马上开始给自己辩解 不 我不是
You start to defend yourself. No, I'm not! Yeah.
白人就不明白这个词在黑人心中的威力
White people don't know the power of coon for Black people.
这可不是什么能被轻轻放下的事
It's a--that's-it's not something you could get away with, but--
没有什么是被黑人叫内鬼更糟的了
There's nothing worse than a nigga calling you coon.
Mark 我好害怕
Mark, I'm scared.
别怕 宝贝 又不咬人
Don't worry, baby. It don't bite.
别闹了 我知道你听过那些传言 他们说这里很危险
Knock it off. I know you've heard the rumors. It's dangerous out here.
Minnie 你跟我在一块呢
Minnie, you're with me.
你没有什么好害怕的
You don't have anything to be afraid of.
你听见了吗
Did you hear that?
就是风而已 宝贝
It's just the wind, baby.
你在胡思乱想 放轻松
You're being paranoid. Relax.
我又听见了
I heard it again.
外面有什么东西
There's something out there.
没有什么东西 相信我
There's nothing out there. Trust me, I--
什么鬼 就是个路人老哥
The fuck? Yo, it's just a regular nigga.
女士
My lady.
♪ 你能否看见 ♪
♪ O say, can you see ♪
Mark
Mark?
♪ 在破晓的晨光前 ♪
♪ By the dawn's early light ♪
彩排就先到这吧
And that's a cut on rehearsal.
谢谢你们 我的大明星们
Thank you so much, my stars.
休息五分钟 好吗
Take five, okay?
难以置信
Unbelievable.
这还只是开场戏呢
Now, that's just the opening scene.
对 如果你还想看后面的戏份 就得拿出点诚意来了
Yeah, and if you want more, you're gonna have to pay for that steak.
-我就是觉得我没 -没看懂
- I just feel like I don't... - Get it?
对 就是这样 我感觉我没看懂
Yeah, that's this--yeah, I don't feel like I get it.
听着 他是一个内鬼人
Look, he's a Werecoon.
对啊 有什么看不懂的
Yeah, what's not to get?
听着 就是为了搞笑而已
Look, it's just funny.
这不是只有搞笑
It's not just funny,
还有更深层的内涵
it's so much more than that.
我是说 这部电影很有意义 很应时
I mean, it's important, it's timely,
我就是不确定这符不符合迪士尼的品牌调性
Well, I'm just not sure it's in line with the Disney brand.
好吧 你们想让我们改什么
Well, look man. What would y'all like for us to change?
对不起 叔 呃 我有一个问题
I--I'm sorry, Unc. Uh, I have a question.
你们这些迪士尼的家伙是不喜欢钱吗
Do you Disney niggas hate money?
哦 兄弟
Oh! Oh, buddy--
别这样 我们可爱钱了
Come on, we love money.
很好 因为我也很爱钱
Good, 'cause I love money, too.
Jordan Peele靠《逃出绝命镇》挣了两三百万
And Jordan Peele made about $200, $300 million on "Get Out,"
我们的本子比《逃出绝命镇》更炫酷
（Biggie歌词）
and our shit is more John Blaze than that.
我们的本子堪比恶灵骑士
I mean, we got some John Blaze shit here.
嘿 听着 我侄子想说的是
Hey, look, what my nephew is trying to say--
你侄子想说的是
No, what your nephew is saying
也许你们两个不适合《内鬼人》这部电影
is that maybe you two aren't right for "Werecoon" at all.
也许我们应该带着我们的剧本去找别人
Maybe we should take our movie elsewhere.
好吧 如果你们这么想的话
Well, if that's how you feel.
我就是这么想的
That's how I feel.
好吧 好吧 行
Okay, well, all right. Yeah.
祝你们好运
Um, best of luck to you fellas.
我们奥斯卡颁奖礼上见 哥们
Yeah, I'll see you at the Oscars, buddy.
你敢信吗
Can you believe this shit?
我真不敢相信
No, I don't believe this shit.
你在干什么
What you doin', man?
这叫坚守自己的立场
It's called standing your ground.
好吗 你对待他们这些混好莱坞的人就得这样
Okay, you have to do that with these Hollywood types.
我不能让他们把我们电影的精髓都改变了
I can't let them suck the soul out of our movie.
我不关心这些 我就想赶紧把电影拍出来
Man, I don't care. I just wanna get the movie made
然后我们能赶紧拿到钱
so we can get this money.
电影会做出来的 好吗
It'll get made, all right?
我们只需要找到一个能欣赏到我们电影最原始本质的地方
We just need to take somewhere where it'll be appreciated in its rawest essence.
好吧 我信你这一回
Okay. Now, I'm gonna trust you.
-我就是想变得像你一样 侄子 -你会的
- I'm just trying to get like you, Nephew. - And you will.
-你带路就好 -有我呢
- Lead the way, baby. - I got you.
好了 我勤劳的小蜜蜂们 我们开工吧
Okay, my honey bees, we're coming back.
有什么工作是永远不会被抵制的
What job is uncancelable?
我要说毛片里的白女
I'm gonna say White lady in a porno.
她们说什么都行
Them bitches say everything,
都不会让我出戏
and it's never taken me out of it.
从来没有一次
It's never once--
从来没有一次让我把裤子提上 然后说
never once have I put my pants back on like,
我真不敢相信那个贱人这么说
I can't believe this bitch said that!
我们进入中场休息 目前君主队暂时领先
And the Monarchs take the lead as we enter half time.
现在 让我们看看大家是如何对着跳舞镜头大秀舞姿的吧
Now, let's see you show your moves for the Dance Cam!
这边座位总是能被拍到 放上大屏幕
This is the section that always gets on the jumbotron.
你为什么这么想上大屏幕
Why do you wanna get on the jumbotron so bad?
因为我想爆红 这样我们就能火了
Because I wanna blow up. We're gonna go viral.
爸爸 不要
Dad, no.
每一个火起来的舞一开始都是这样 先被大屏幕拍到了
Every viral dance starts just like this on a jumbotron.
叛逆者 玛卡雷娜 都是这样
The "Renegade," the "Macarena."
爸 已经没人跳那些舞了
Dad, nobody's doing those anymore.
他们都会跳我的Num Num舞的
They're gon' be doin' the "Num Num."
求你了 别跳你那个舞 别跳Num Num
Please don't do that dance. No "Num Num."
你喜欢这个舞 大家都喜欢 嘿 嘿 那是我们俩
You like that dance. Everybody likes the-Hey, hey, it's us!
那是我们 到我表现的时候了
It's us! This is my time!
把手合起来
Putting it together. Ahh!
然后
And--
大家一起来
Everybody!
快坐下吧 爸
Please sit down. Dad.
保安 快把这个变态赶出去
Security, let's get this pervert out of here.
-你们都没感受到我的激情吗 -天啊 保安过来了
- Y'all don't feel it, though. - Oh, my God, security's coming.
快 大家一起来
Come on, everybody!
悠着点
Uh, ah, oh, slow it down.
走吧 好好好 一会再签名
Let's go. Okay. Autographs later.
好了 大家动作文明一点
Okay, everybody keep it clean.
爸 爸 大家都在给我打电话
Dad, Dad, everybody's hittin' me up.
他们都看到你了
They all saw you.
太棒了
Yeah!
你老爸要火了 早就跟你说过了
Your old man's goin' viral. I told you.
这就是我生活的新篇章
This is the beginning of my new life.
没错
Yep.
次日
开除 呃
Fired? Uh--
我都在这干了20年了
After 20 years.
就因为一个舞
Over a dance.
你老婆打电话过来了
Your wife called.
离婚
Divorce.
就因为一个舞
Because of a dance?
工作被炒 老婆跑了 房子没了 小孩恨我
Fired, wife gone, house gone, kid hates me.
后面还有什么
What's next?
在接下来的一个月内 你将作为一名性犯罪者被记录在案
You're also gonna have to register as a sex offender in the next 30 days
否则你就要进监狱
or you're going to jail.
我才不要因为跳了一个舞就被登记成性犯罪者
Hell no. I'm not registering as a sex offender because of a dance.
不可能 他们要抓我就来抓吧
Uh-uh. They gon' have to arrest me.
你宁愿不看片干搓
Would you rather jerk off without porn
还是看着片不动手
or watch porn without jerking off?
这两个我都干过
Both things I've done.
我要选不看片干搓
I'm gonna say jerk off without porn.
你还能这样
You can do that?
当然了
Oh, yeah, man.
你在跟我开玩笑吗 你知道我看过多少片吗
What, are you kiddin' me? You know how much porn I've watched?
我都能背出里面的台词
I can start quotin' that shit.
我会在洗澡的时候背 就跟《好家伙》里演得一样
I quote porn in the shower like it's "Goodfellas."
哦 宝贝 刚刚太棒了
Whoo! Oh, baby. That was amazing.
我知道 那个女演员真疯狂啊
Yeah, I know. She crazy.
你在干什么
What are you doin'?
还剩十三分钟没看完
There's 13 minutes left in the movie.
这是个黄片 你知道最后会发生什么
It's a porno. You know how it ends.
来吧 让我们再来一次
Come on, let's go again.
好吧 这次你想看什么 群交大巴
Okay. What you wanna watch? "Bang Bus"?
这次让我们运用自己的想象力吧
Uh--let's use our own imaginations this time.
我们自己的想象力
Our own imagination?
-想象力 -行吧
- Imagination. - A'ight.
[Camila Paiva's "Grind For Two"]
♪ Gimme all that amnesia ♪
♪ Go on up, boy, you a keeper ♪
♪ And I'ma bring the juice, babe ♪
♪ Love potion let loose, babe ♪
♪ We can make our move, babe ♪
♪ Tonight it's my duty to you ♪
♪ I'ma ride this shit a time or two ♪
♪ Make the climb with you, yeah ♪
他可不是她的继父
That ain't her stepdad.
这才叫像样的奶油派[中出]
Now that's a cream pie!
这真是个好主意 宝贝
Oh, that was a great idea, baby.
我就说嘛
I told you.
你宁愿发现耶稣是个黑人
Would you rather find out Jesus was Black
但是他是个骗子 没有任何的神力
but was a con man and didn't have any superpowers?
-还是 -哟 Wil 这可比Wordle有意思多了
- Or -Yo, Wil, you-- this is better than Wordle.
你得
Like, you need to--
你得用这些问题开发一个新版的Wordle
You need to do your own Wordle with these questions.
你宁愿耶稣是个黑人不过是个没有任何的神力的骗子
Would you rather Jesus be Black and a con man and had no powers.
这也太有意思了
That's funny as shit.
还是他是个黑人 但是是个内鬼
Or he was Black, but he was a coon.
耶稣是内鬼 这要怎么实现
Jesus was-how was Jesus a coon?
他只给白人治病
He was only healing White people.
干杯 恭喜你升职了 Damien
Cheers. Congrats on the promotion, Damien.
真的 不想不出有谁能比你更合适
Truly, I can't think of a better guy it could've gone to.
谢了 Greg
Thanks, Greg.
我们俩能一块见证不是Tariq得到这份工作我就很高兴了
I'm just glad we could both be there to see Tariq not get the job.
见鬼 是内鬼人
Shit! It's Werecoon.
我们得赶紧离开这个鬼地方
W-we gotta get the fuck outta here.
兄弟 我才不怕那个人呢
Man, I ain't scared of that nigga.
怎么了 弱鸡
What's up, pussy?
黑人姑娘的问题是
Man, the problem with Black women
她们总是唠叨 还不好好听别人讲话·
is they be talkin' when they should be listenin'.
他说的还挺有道理的
He's got some pretty good points.
这只是个开胃小菜
And that is just the sizzle.
如果你还想看后面的视觉盛宴
But if you want the steak--
那是什么鬼
What the fuck was that?
是啊 我 我没看懂
Yeah, I-- I don't get it.
有什么不懂的
What's not to get?
他在月圆之夜出现 然后狠狠把人抽醒
He comes out in a full moon, and he slaps sense into niggas.
他刚才干的是这个
That's what he was doin'?
-所以他把好好的黑人变成内鬼 -正是
- So he turns niggas into coons. - Exactly.
所以他为什么像狼一样嚎叫
So why was he howling like a wolf?
因为他只有一半是人[neta狼人]
Because he's a were-coon.
听着 这个电影就是搞笑的
Look, it's just funny.
但是这部电影不仅仅是为了搞笑 叔
Man, but it's not just funny, Unc.
还很有意义
It's also important.
很有力量
And--and powerful.
反正我很喜欢
Well, I loved it.
谢谢你 看到没
Thank you! See?
不过我只是个清洁工
Of course, I'm just the janitor.
你是清洁工 你为什么穿着西装
You're the janitor? Why you dressed in a suit?
因为在Tyler Perry工作室人人都能穿西装
'Cause we all get to wear suits here at Tyler Perry Studios.
你得穿配得上自己想做工作的衣服
You dress for the job you want.
这里真的就像应许之地一般
It truly is the promised land.
对不起 这是我见过的最糟糕的东西
I'm sorry, but that is the worst shit I've ever seen,
出自一个为Tyler Perry工作的人之口
and I work for Tyler Perry.
听着 我们还有别的
Listen, we got some other shit.
我写了一部科幻电影
I wrote a science fiction film
里面的浣熊变成了猴子
where, like, the raccoons turn into monkeys,
它们攻击所有浅肤色的黑人
and they attack all the light-skinned Black people.
哦 不 不 等等 等等
Oh, no, no. Hang on, hang on.
如果你们都蠢到今天放弃《内鬼人》这部伟大电影的话
If y'all are dumb enough to pass on "Werecoon" on this piece of history.
也许我们来错地方了
Maybe we're in the wrong place, I mean--
我觉得你们该走了
I think you should leave.
是啊 也许我们该走了
Yeah, maybe we should.
走吧 叔
Come on, Unc.
不好意思
I'm sorry.
走的时候把垃圾带着
Well, take this trash with you.
去你们的
Suck our dick.
你有去过心理治疗吗 Wil
You ever been to therapy, Wil?
心理治疗 没有
Therapy? Uh,no.
很多黑人 心理治疗不是很像黑人会做的事
A lot of Black-that's not a very Black man thing.
我们现在才刚刚开始涉足这个领域
We're, like, just now getting into therapy.
因为我们是真男人
现在不要进来 我在工作
No--no. Do not come in right now. I'm working.
-我是Kevin Hammerberger Jr. -Kevin 我是Oscar
- Kevin Hammerberger Jr. - Kevin, it's Oscar.
Oscar 好孩子 我最喜欢的楼层经理怎么样了
Oscar, my boy! How is my favorite floor manager?
其实
So, actually--
听听这个 听听这个 Nadia给我打电话了
Listen to this, listen to this: Nadia calls me.
她给你打电话了
She called you?
就刚才 就刚才
Just now, just now.
她打电话给我 说她想要—听好了—请一天心理健康假
She calls me and she asks for--get this-- a mental health day.
是吗
Oh, really?
没错
Yeah, right.
她的感情受伤了 她不能工作了
Her feelings are hurt, and she can't work.
你能 你明白吗
Can you--do you get it? Right.
要不是她是我的女儿的话 孩子 我肯定
If she wasn't my daughter, boy, I would--
我也需要一天心理健康假
I need a mental health day, too.
-是吗 -没错 千真万确
- What? - Yeah, absolutely.
Oscar 我刚告诉你Nadia做了这么无理取闹的事
Oscar, I just told you Nadia's doing this nonsense,
你就告诉我你也要干一样的事
and you're gonna tell me you're doing the same thing?
你也需要一天心理健康假
You need a mental health day, too?
对不起 是的
Sorry, but yes.
好吧 你知道我怎么想吗 Oscar
Well, you know what I think, Oscar?
我觉得你太懒了
I think you're lazy,
我觉得你被宠坏了
and I think you're entitled.
我父亲每天都去上班
My father, he came to work every day.
每天上两个十小时的班
Two ten hour shifts every day
从他12岁一直干到到他28岁去世
from the time he was 12 until he died at 28.
真的吗
Oh, really?
没错
That's right.
听起来很不健康
Sounds unhealthy.
我告诉你 Oscar
I'll tell you what, Oscar.
要么你今天 我们一年中最忙的一天来
Either you come in today, our busiest day of the year,
要么你就永远也别来了
or you don't come in at all.
我不来了
I'm not coming.
好 既然你已经决定好了 Oscar
Okay, well, you've made your choice, Oscar.
-祝你生活愉快 -再见 -再见
- Have a good life. - Bye. - Bye.
Cherise 这是什么
Cherise, what is this?
Tony要请一天心理健康假
"Tony is taking a mental health day."
到底什么是见鬼的心理健康假
What the fuck is a mental health day?
这才不是个实实在在的东西
It's not even a real thing.
你不会说 哦 我要请一天身体健康假
You wouldn't say, "Oh, I need a physical health day."
你会说 哦 我的腿摔断了
You would say, "Oh, I broke my leg,
我要去看医生 拿个拐杖 打个石膏
and I'm going to the doctor to get some crutches and a cast,"
然后你就回来上班了
then you bring your ass back to work.
我也不明白
I don't get it either.
家家有本难念的经
It's hard out here for everybody.
我们都有自己的问题
We all got problems, you know.
你知道我喜欢你哪一点吗
You know what I like about you?
你工作很努力
You're a hard worker.
你很敬业
You're dedicated.
你不像其他那些该死的千禧一代那些人
You're not like the rest of these goddamn millennials.
你说得对 呃
You're right, um--
嘿 Hammerberger先生
But hey, Mr. Hammerberger...
有什么事 Cherise
Mm, yes, Cherise?
你知道 我一直在想
You know, I've been thinking.
你在想什么
Mm, what were you thinking?
下班以后
After work...
你知道 我和你 呃
You know, me and you, uh...
如你所见
As you can see,
他已经完全与现实脱节了
he's completely lost touch with reality.
Edwards医生 我爸爸会好起来吗
Dr. Edwards, is my dad ever gonna be okay?
现在还不好说
Well, it's too soon to tell.
他的大脑因为从来没有放松过被完全烧坏了
His brain was essentially fried to shit from never relaxing.
不过他吃药吃得很好
But he's taken well to the medication,
这很好
so that's good.
非常感谢你们的帮助
Thank you so much for all of your help.
我们就是干这个的
That's what we're here for.
目前为止 他的妄想都是以现实为基础的
For now, his delusions are based in reality,
所以我们认为他还没走到无力回天那一步
so we don't think this isn't anything that can't be reversed.
该死的 姑娘 我们不能在工作中的时候乱搞
Damn, girl, you can't be fuckin' me at work.
他确实经常以为自己在和同事XX
Well, he does often think he's having sex with coworkers.
趁现在还没变得更生动 你最好赶紧先离开这里
You should head out now before it gets any more graphic.
喂
Hello?
老兄 世界上根本没有什么心理健康假这回事
Man, ain't no such thing as a mental health day,
你最好赶紧回来上班
you better bring your ass to work.
该死 Cherise 你真棒 宝贝
Damn, Cherise. You got it, baby.
最新 兴起一股崭新的舞蹈风潮
This latest dance craze is so popular,
给你看病的医生都在跳
you might even find your doctor doing it.
美国同胞们
My fellow Americans,
战争结束了
the war is over.
我不知道自己是否信教
I don't know if I'm religious or not.
我肯定不是那种会去做实事的信教者
I'm definitely not religious in practice.
我确实相信世上有神 但是
I do think there's a God, and...
我不想说他
I don't wanna say he's...
不伟大
not great.
但我要说 如果我是上帝的话
But I will say, if I was God,
我可能会跟他干的不太一样
I would do things differently.
我觉得世上有神
I think there's somebody up there
但我觉得他的计划不那么完美
but I don't think his plan was perfect.
实话说 我觉得他可能已经放弃我们了
In fact, I think he might've quit on us.
我们就在这等着他回来
And we're just here waiting for him to come back.
没错 我父母离异了
Yes, my parents are divorced.
往好听了说 他不是个好爹
At the very least, he's a bad father.
如果你像上帝对我们一样对待自己的小孩
If you did what God did to your kids,
你不能就说一句 我神秘莫测 不行 兄弟
you couldn't be like, "I'm mysterious." No, nigga.
他接到了球 这是个反向传球
He takes the snap, it's a reverse.
他到达10码线 5码线 触地得分
He's at the ten, the five, touchdown!
这是我发明的舞 我的舞
This is my dance. This is my dance!
嘿 大伙 这是我的舞
Hey, y'all, this is my dance.
都是我发明的
That's all me.
闪一边去 强奸犯
Beat it, rapist.
那是抖音上的舞
That's a TikTok dance.
小孩都在学
All the kids is doin' it.
我没有强奸
I didn't rape.
我就跳了个舞
I "Num Num'd."
那场比赛我也去了
Hey, I was at the game.
我看见你和你儿子了
I saw you and your son.
我知道那个舞是你发明的
I know that's your dance.
-跳得不错 -是吧
- Good shit. - Yeah?
Num Num先生
Mr. "Num Num."
是啊
Yeah.
Num Num先生
Mr. "Num Num."
你知道这是怎么回事吗
Do you know what the fuck's going on?
我觉得所有人都不知道这他妈的是怎么回事
I don't think anybody knows what the fuck is going on.
好吧
Okay.
我们会弄清楚的
We'll figure it out.
不 不 等等
No, no, hold on.
我知道了 我知道了 我想我把剧本的毛病解决了 伙计们
I got it, I got it. I think I fixed the problem with the script, guys.
在这个版本的剧本里 内鬼人跟警察联手 给所有黑人接种疫苗
In this version, Werecoon joins forces with the police to get all the Black people vaccinated.
Che 我说不好 兄弟
Che, I don't know about this, man.
我怎么一点都不惊讶呢
Why am I not surprised?
你知道吗 我试着把你打造成下一个Terry Crew
You know what, I've been trying to make you the next Terry Crew,
而你一直在抗拒
and you keep resisting!
好了 你不用那么生气
Okay. You don't have to get angry.
我没有
I'm not--
我没有生气 我只是很有激情 仅此而已
I'm not angry. I'm just passionate. That's all.
好吧 我们只是说 我们已经用你的钱拍这个电影拍了很久了
Okay, we're just saying that we've spent a lot of time filming on your dime already.
你想说什么
And your point?
我连自己是好人还是坏人都不知道
I don't even know if I'm the good guy or the bad guy.
喔 嘿 嘿 听着
Whoa, hey, hey. Now, listen.
你有什么想改的地方
What would you like to change?
我第一次看到这个剧本的时候
When I first read the script,
觉得它很搞笑
I just thought it was hilarious.
但现在感觉有点太高高在上 太刻意追求深度了
But now it feels too self-righteous and important.
你知道吗 也许 如果我们把那些笑话再写进去的话
You know, maybe, if we put back in all the jokes,
它就又有一部喜剧片的样了
it could start feeling like a comedy again.
嗯 让我考虑一下
Hmm, let me think about that.
-你被开除了 -什么
- You're fuckin' fired. - What?
哇哦 侄子 嘿
Whoa, whoa, Nephew, hey.
我要他赶紧滚出这里 他会搞砸我的电影的
I want him outta here. He's fuckin' up my movie.
你的电影 你个偷东西的混蛋
Your movie? You thievin' bastard.
我可是以我们的名义骂了Madea
I told Madea to suck our dick.
这是我们的电影
It's our film.
我知道 我知道 你说得对
I know, I know. You're right.
这是我们的电影
It's our movie,
我只是想保护我们剧本的完整性 好吗
and I'm just trying to protect the integrity of the script, okay?
我是说 你难道不想让这部电影有点什么意义吗
I mean, don't you want this movie to mean something?
我他妈才不在乎这部电影呢
I don't give a fuck about this movie.
我只想要钱
I just want the money.
好吧 但这是我们应该为这个社群做的
Yeah, but we owe it to the community.
这个社群从自助洗衣店的烘干机里偷走了我的内裤
The community stole my underwear out the dryer in the Laundromat.
这个社群偷了我的车
The community stole my car.
让我在自己女儿面前被人一拳打在脸上
I got smacked in my face in front of my daughter in the community.
我不知道你想说什么
I don't know what that's supposed to mean.
去他妈的什么社群
Fuck the community.
让我们拍了这部电影 拿到这笔钱
Let's make this film, get this money,
然后离开这个社群
and get out the community.
我觉得你这么说就有点肤浅了
I think you're being a little shortsighted here.
我是说 我们有机会拍一部真正有意义的电影
I mean, we have an opportunity to make actual important cinema.
我一开始跟你说的是
What I told you off the top was
-我想变成你这样 你知道吗 -好
- I wanna get to your level, you know? - Okay.
我们能上电视 说点什么屁话
We can jump on television, say some bullshit,
给白人们表演点什么把戏
do a little tap dance for the White man,
然后拿到钱
and get paid!
你觉得我的工作是这样的
Is that what you think I do?
你以为是什么样
What do you think you do?
你更愿意钻天主教教义的漏洞还是摩门教教义的漏洞
Would you rather participate in a Catholic loophole or the Mormon loophole?
天主教教义的漏洞
A Catholic loophole?
对 你懂的 不能XX 所以就走后门
Yeah, you know, can't have sex, so you have anal.
还有
And--
等一下
Wait a minute.
还有摩门教徒 你知道他们会怎么做 对吧 他们会浸泡
And Mormons, you know what they do, right, they do soaking.
你知道什么意思吗
You know what soaking is?
什么意思
What's soaking?
浸泡 就是男的把自己的XX放进女人的XX里
Soaking--the guy put the penis in the vagina,
但是他不动
but he doesn't move.
就在里面待着
He just let it soak.
哦 我可不想让我的XX泡皱了
Oh, I don't think I want my penis pruned up.
翻译：@灾难尽头