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Language, Duncan.
Whatever, fine. Me and my bad attitude are outta here.
That's fine with me.
How do you like... THAT!
Uhh.
- After you... - Thanks. See you next week.
Finally.
- Wait wait. Duncan..it's me, Duncan. - It's my brother, it's Duncan.
What are you doing out here?
Geez, you scared the piss out of me.
It's my apartment.
Hey, Wonder Woman, Could you point that somewhere else please? ...Thank you.
Sandy, why don't you go warm up the car, okay?
- You'll be safe, I'll watch you. I promise. - Okay, but watch close. Okay.
She seems nice.
And vigilant.
I'm sure your wife would like her.
Why do you always do that?
What happened to work? Did you get fired again?
- I was just... why do you always do that? - Jesus you got fired again. You've only been there a couple of weeks.
God, you are such an incompetent.
Come on, cut me some slack, Jake.
I haven't asked you for money in a long time.
Yeah but I've given you plenty. I've left a little something on the table tonight.
That doesn't count. You think you're doing me a favor by bringing all these bimbos here?
Go screw 'em somewhere else.
Alright, quit being a dick. Do you want some capital or not?
No, actually.
I'm fine. I'll... work it out.
Sheez, the shit I put up with.
Just let me know if you need some cash okay?
And go visit grandma and grampa's new place. They've been asking about you.
- Eh, I dunno I got a lot of stuff to do. - Yeah I know you're a really busy guy but maybe you could squeeze in
ten minutes of your hectic unemployed schedule and go see 'em.
I just don't like to see 'em like that.
It doesn't matter dude. It's why they moved to the city, to be close to us.
Pull your head out. Take the fifty I left you, get grandma a coffee cake and get your ass over there.
See ya.
What am I, made of money?
Jesus Dunc, how many jobs is that?
Why, you writing my resume? Do you even have a resume?
Is that how you landed that great gig as piss boy at the paint store?
What about your office? Got any jobs there?
Oh please, come on. Even the guys in the mailroom have a college degree.
Besides you don't work there. Eveyone's an asshole.
- Including you? - Especially me.
Maybe Finn can give you a job at the warehouse, huh?
Finn! Would you want to work for Finn?
The predominant majority of jobs here are union, Dunc.
I'm totally union. I'm like Norma fuckin' Rae.
It's a grand to join. You have to apprentice for six months.
Apprentice what, it's a forklift.
It's like a golf cart with the lifting thing on front.
It's not that easy.
Well, you do it.
Oops. Okay, very funny.
Yeah.
Nice!
I don't think you appreciate the precariousness of the situation here.
If you hurt yourself, if you break something, that's a liability.
Yeah, precariousness?
You realize that you sound like Don King when you use big words, Finn?
And, come on, it's moving boxes of liquor.
I think I can handle that.
You know something Dunc, the last time I gave you a job.
Jesus we were seventeen, we were mowing lawns.
I know that, okay? And you mowed the word asshole into somebody's lawn and I got fired, Dunc.
I got fired.
Whatever happened to your sense of humor? And that was a long time ago.
Well what have you been doing with your life since then?
I've been working my ass off trying to improve my status quo.
Why would I just give you a job?
I don't know. I do appreciate how hard you had to work here at Finn and Son, Finn.
But I was hoping that maybe you would have my back on this.
Nah, no Doug, I can't. I'm sorry.
- Don't kick it. - I didn't do anything.
But he sees me in the hall with the thing, and he says to me that's not how you do it.
So I says back "Well Christ." How do you do it, you saw dog midget half-wit?
Ronald, you did not say that to him.
I'm telling this story, Ruth.
Mmm. So tell it right.
I bet ten years ago you had to set him straight, grampa.
Damn right, Duncan.
Damn right.
I may be old, but I still got my two friends, my left fist and my right.
It's too bad your old pal common sense left so long ago.
Ten years! Duncan, I was going to call you on Monday.
Did you remember that?
Yeah, yeah.
I saw it on the calendar.
How's the shoe store, kiddo?
The shoe store?
Jacob says he's working in groceries.
Yeah, I was.
I was, for about three months.
Groceries.
That's not a good racket. Markups no good.
You know, I should probably get going.
I've just got a bunch of stuff I should be doing today.
You do not. You just got here.
You haven't even seen the view.
- Come see the view. - Yeah.
See?
That's beautiful. You've got both the downtowns and a river.
Yeah.
At night, can see the northern lights.
Really, the northern lights? Seen 'em last night, dancin'.
- That's funny, I didn't know. - Ronald, did you go yet today?
Didn't I go, Ruth?
Well, I know, but you have to be on a schedule with this medication. It's your kidneys.
Okay.
- Alright, get up now. One..two. - No need Duncan, we got a system.
Well that was slitch.
- Grampa's little helper. You remember that, Ruth? - Yep.
You used to follow me around the hardware store all day long trying to help.
You look like your dad.
So do you.
I'm better lookin' than he ever was.
Grampa's little helper.
Well yell if you need some assistance.
Assistance?
Taking a leak for Christ sakes.
That's where grampa's little helper draws the line okay?
Excuse me.
- Could I get an application? - We're out. Waiting for the printer to send more, about a week.
Just need your name and address, I can send you one then.
So this is the admission forms desk and you're out of admission forms.
Great.
Hello?
Hey, good morning.
Well what sort of situation?
Did you call 911?
Grampa, if you're having an emergency you call 911.
Okay I'll be right here.
- Grampa? - In here.
- You Okay? - You need to get this out into the other room.
- What? The TV? - Yeah yeah, this is what I need.
You gotta slide it out there.
- I thought that you were hurt. - I said emergency and it is. Come on.
Let's get the goddamn thing outta here.
No no don't. You don't take off your coat. You don't have time. She'll be back any minute now.
I'm baking in this thing.
- Hurry. - I'll have it done in a second.
Ronald, I'm home.
Oh Christ.
No matter now, Duncan.
Ronald, you know Kate's gonna be here. You're gonna need to get cleaned up.
Duncan, hi!
- Ronald! - I was just having the kid move some things.
- No TV, you know that. - Ruth.
Why can't he have the TV?
Because he'll just sit and watch it and do not another damn thing. It mushes his brain.
Load of shit.
Listen, would you get the door?
We'll be out in a minute.
Ronald, don't you bring him into this now.
He wanted to help.
Nothing wrong with a kid helping out his grandfather.
Um, am I in the right place?
Yeah, the Shorters, Ruth and Ronald.
- I'm Duncan. - Oh, I'm the home assistant. Kate.
- Hi. - Hi.
- Is that Kate? - Yeah it's me, Ruthie.
How ya feeling today, Ronnie? You're runnin' a little hot, your pressure's up.
It's cause you're here.
- His pressure's up because he was up to no good. - Shit.
Follow the light.
Follow.
And who is the president?
That slick dickweed in the suit.
I didn't vote for him.
- And what's his name? - Hmm?
The dickweed. What's his name?
Bob Hope.
Ronald, what's his name?
Duncan, who's the president?
It's Bing Crosby.
- For God's sake. - That's my grandson.
- He's a good'UN. - Yeah.
Best hockey player you ever seen.
Skates like a goddamn Canuck.
- Good lookin' to boot. - You're blushing.
His grandfather's embarrassing him.
- Duncan? - That's okay.
I got him.
He's a good one.
Always there to help his grandfather.
Okay, well I'll see you next week.
Okay.
Bye, Duncan.
Oh, oh my.
Let me get this for you.
Oh, thanks!
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
- Bye. - Bye.
Can you patch a wall?
Yeah, I've been known to spackle.
You ever go to jail?
You steal?
No sir, but if I was a thief I'd probably also be a liar.
So it's kind of hard to trust a guy either way, isn't it.
True, really true.
I've had a bit of a checkered employment history but I need this job.
For more than just me. I need to be in this building and I promise you I will work my ass off.
A promise from a thief and a liar?
Okay.
Tomorrow. Eight. Do not be late. The guy before, always late.
Sorry, my bad.
- Hey Stu. - Hey numnuts.
Whoa, whoa, stinky!
Holy balls, the battery melted. Must have fallen off when you stomped on the brakes.
See?
Two posts hit the metal on the hood, then POW!
- What do you mean, POW? It's a brand new battery. - Don't I know it, I sold it to you.
At cost.
You didn't attach those two brackets I gave you, did you. They're to keep the battery in place, dipshit.
- Well you never told me that did you. - Telling you now.
I'll nose around and see if you didn't smoke up the electricals too bad.
Not that I want to make your car my life's work.
Ah, you lack vision, Stu.
Yeah but you gotta find something new.
I can't afford something new. I can't even afford to fix that piece.
Yeah, we'll see what we can work out. Maybe I can get you to plow for me.
But, um...
I'm just glad to help out.
You know that was ten years ago?
What's that?
It's been ten years since dad died. This week.
Ten years?
Oh man.
I was thinking about him this weekend watching the blow-job Vikings.
God, he used to hate it when they'd try to make a field goal from the one yard line. He'd fucking scream out: ONE YARD?
Give it to me I'll carry it three fuckin' feet.
Drive me fuckin' nuts.
Yeah.
- Anyway, thanks for the ride. - See you.
- Did you want to make out with me? - Hey, don't hit on the redhead. I don't appreciate it.
So you win tonight?
Not with that woman Hacksetter at goal.
Hey hey hey.
You know I've seen better hands on a snake.
Where were you? We needed you. They killed us man, they literally killed us.
You literally got killed. That's interesting.
You know Finn, maybe you shouldn't use words that you don't understand.
Hey, dumb ass, I didn't mean literally as in "literally."
Well, how else could you possibly mean it, college boy?
Oh, oh college boy.
Do you want a little of this ...?
Literally...
Knock it off you hooligans. Hey stop it.
What is this crap? How am I supposed to pommel him to this?
Sorry, that was uncalled for. I apologize.
"So all worthwhile."
- What's with the singing? - It's Hack's new scam.
He plays this song and then he tells people that his wife just left him and that "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" was her favorite show.
Guarantees some poor slob buys him a drink.
- Every time. - So then, Hacksetter is actually a horrible human being.
Oh, a horrible human being by all accounts.
To horrible human beings.
- But at least that horror showed up to the game. - Where were you, dipstick? We needed you man. We had six.
- No subs, no subs. And chunky butt here's not in good shape. - Don't call me chunky... cry about it later fatty.
I got stuck at my grandparents' place and my goddamn car broke down again.
Christ almighty on a crutch, would you please just buy a new one already.
With what, Finn?
- Get a job, fuckup. - Uh, I got a job but now I don't have a car to get me to the job.
Wait, what, what, what? You have a job? Oh my God, you sellout, what are you doing?
Well, you know, I'm gonna be working at an apartment building. Going to be a maintenance man.
What, like handyman?
Like, a... tool belt, like that guy Schneider on the TV show, "Hey Miss Romano"?
Unbelievable. That works every time.
Shit, that was fast.
Like under two minutes, man.
- A record. - Hey Lindy, can you give me a ride to work tomorrow?
Hell no. That's like 10 minutes out of my way, 20 minutes during rush hour.
You don't even know where he works.
That's not the point.
Come on man. Don't make me fight the bus. Now I've gotta figure out the fares and schedule and the transfers and.
Why not do what you normally do. Don't show up and get fired and whine about it.
Nope, I actually need this job.
Then you better get on the bus, Gus.
Okay, you knock.
Why me?
She's crazy. She do not answer door if a black man knocks. You knock.
Who is it?
Maintenance.
Two of you.
I don't like that. I don't like that one bit.
I'm watching you.
Oh boy.
Ronald, did you hear that?
Duncan is now working in the building. He started this morning.
The building?
- He works at the bank. - No, that's Jake, grampa.
Jacob works in the bank. I'm going to be a handyman here.
Handy man.
You don't even know the difference between hammers, do you?
Are you kidding, I worked for you all those summers.
You don't know a hammer from your dick.
Ronald!
Don't worry, I know my hammers, old man.
Then can grab me a ball peen from my toolbox.
It's under the sink.
Sure, sure I'll be right back.
No, make that a claw, wise-ass.
Come on, honey, let's do this. See?
That's not a claw.
Oh, yeah it is.
Is it good?
Let me see it.
Ruth?
Cover your eyes.
- What? - Cover your eyes.
Ronald.
- What a mess. - The ball's there.
Do you want a ride?
Okay.
Thanks.
What's wrong with him?
Well, he's got Parkinson's and the kidney problems and his heart is a little shaky.
But your grandma's main concern is that he might have the A-bomb.
Alzheimer's?
Yeah, she wants me to keep an eye on it.
Apparently he had a brother who had it.
Yeah, Sterling.
But he was one of those crazy northwood types to begin with so when he lost his mind it wasn't all that easy to tell.
You know I just mostly.
- What are you doing? - Alright, I got it. I can drive with my knee.
You've never seen that before? Look. I'm turning. Well, I need to turn here.
- Yeah with hands. - I just think he's more depressed than anything.
You know?
But he talks about you a lot.
Don't believe anything that's coming out of his mouth.
Well, he's got some good stories about you and your brother David.
That's Jacob.
David is my dad.
Oh.
And I just find it's hard to meet people around here.
But that's not true.
Yes it is. Okay, I bet that you've known all your friends since the fourth grade.
- Am I right? - Yeah, but I'm not a good example. I don't get out much.
Besides, where have you lived that's any different?
Oh, Portland, Seattle, Jackson Hall, Atlanta, Boston.
- Hey Dunc. - Hey Mishak. You gonna come watch the game?
Of course. I'll be there. I'll see you there.
Go Vikings!
Okay, what is up with everyone watching the game?
Women watch the Vikings game.
Gay guys watch. People who have absolutely no interest in football watch.
I met this guy in the orchestra, and he couldn't go to the movies with me on Sunday because he had to watch the game.
And I was like dude you're a violinist.
It's not even about the football.
It's a loyalty thing.
Tell me.
To the team, to the guys you watch the game with.
And you know you gotta remember that we're in Minneapolis, there's not really a lot to do here.
No, but you're so wrong. This is a great place to live.
Just not here in my neighborhood.
Yeah, this is a little more adventurous than my place over in St. Paul.
Saint what?
St. Paul. It's on the other side of the river.
Never heard of it.
Wow, does this smart-ass junior-high routine work with all the ladies?
Not yet.
And the sad thing is I actually thought I was carrying on an adult conversation.
You working a puzzle?
My damn hand shakes so much.
I can't do it.
Afraid I might shove a piece right up my ass.
Oh I don't think you're doing it quite right.
I got no interest in it.
Got an interest in that sandwich, though.
- Right here? - Right there.
Good!
Got mustard?
I could have been mayor.
How about that.
Had my campaign fund, everything.
Mayor Shorter.
Didn't do it, though.
Good.
You know...
shoulda done it.
Hey!
Young fella.
Come here.
We need a fourth. Will you sit in and play with us?
You deal. You deal.
Take your hat off.
Okay, what's your poison?
I love this room!
11:30.
Oh my God! Billy and the Bronzed Gods.
I know couple of these guys from when I lived in Austin.
I've seen these guys before.
Like when they were in their replacements phase.
Do you know their replacements is why I came here?
- Oh God, you're one of those. - No, I'm not.
Wait, one of what?
One of those people who moved to Minneapolis because you thought it would be like a replacement song.
You mean there are others?
Aw, I can't believe that. Shit. When am I going to have an original thought?
I don't know. Now you're just one of the masses.
Hunting down Paul Westerberg so you can tell him that his music saved your life.
Yeah, so. No, you know what, I just want to meet him once.
You know, just to...
maybe look adoringly at him and smell his hair.
Do you think that's crazy?
Yes!
But I'm glad you're here anyway.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Gonna hang out and watch the Vikings game.
Anyhoo, working on a whole new thing right?
- It's going to make Hacksetter a little more appealing to the ladies. - Oh yeah, you getting yourself a facelift?
Pretendin' to be an Indian.
Really? An Indian.
- And that's going to make you more attractive? - Oh yeah. It's gonna give me a whole sense of mystery.
Or exoticness.
Like I'm not going to come right out and say...
Hi, I'm a quarter Chippewa. No.
You know, I'm going to be casual about it.
You know. I'll refer to the president as uh, the Great White Father.
And uh, someway bring up, uh
uh whatever one of them, Lake Superior, Lake Superior I'm a, you know, say or as as my people call it...
Gitchigumi, or whatever they say.
Next thing you know
back at the sweat lodge, man.
That is a good plan that is going to get you scalped.
Mmm.
It is going to give me a lot.
Scalped and then some. Maybe they'll skin me. Whole.
Yep.
It's fried, Sparky.
Well I'm broke, Stu.
If it costs a nickel to get to the north pole I couldn't make it as far as Duluth.
Ronald, Duncan's here.
- Ronald? - Yeah, yeah.
Just finishing.
- What's it do? - It's a sculpture. It doesn't do anything. You look at it.
It's big cherry in a goddamn big spoon.
- Oh the shit. - Remember when you used to tell Jake and me to go outside and blow the stink off?
- Ehh, you two could drive me nuts. - Well, you're driving grandma nuts so we're blowing the stink off, old man.
Hardware.
Goddamn, hardware!
7-6...
I can tell just by the feel.
I lost his store and he died.
Same year.
That's a long time ago, now.
You got a raw deal but you turned out alright.
Gosh Christ. Look at that, will ya?
Yeah.
Must be 1950, for God's sakes.
I'll do something for you some someday.
You turned out all right you know.
You go hunting. You need shells?
I could get you some shotgun shells.
I'm good thanks.
Want to get some for me, then?
What the hell do you need shells for?
You do a lot of hunting up there on the sixth floor?
Is she hot?
- You're was such an asshole. - I'm just asking.
Well I'll have to check with Cara. She has a very precise table plan at Thanksgiving. Another person may throw it off.
You know how she can get.
You know, it's been ten years.
No, not 'til grandma told me. You know it's kind of a female thing to remember dates and anniversaries like that, isn't it?
He's our dad, dickhead.
Don't you ever think about him?
Well I know if he were here right now he'd be flipping you shit for missing that deer.
Uh, Duncan, on your next shot I want you to scare it my way so I can hit it.
I always hated hunting anyhow.
I just liked going out in the woods with you guys.
Really? That's gay.
Hey, don't tell Cara you hate it. She thinks we're going up north the last weekend of pheasant season.
Lemme guess.
You're holding another meeting of the Bimbo-of-the-Month club.
Yeah, going to a bed and breakfast down south.
Why?
Cause I'm tired of fucking her in Minneapolis, want to fuck her in Rochester for a change.
Then I'll fuck her in Dubuque for a change.
You know, I could just shoot you out here and tell everybody it was an accident.
Hey, don't joke about shit like that.
Sorry, I didn't mean to offend your delicate sensibilities.
You're not my brother.
Oh right, my high school dropout loser mooch brother disowns me. Whaddya doing? Whoa. Quit fucking around D, it's not funny.
Shut up. Deer.
Now now wait wait for me. Just, shh, I got it.
Not even close.
I love Thanksgiving. I mean the idea of it anyway.
- Because I never had the big family Thanksgiving. - What are you doing this year?
Oh, the usual.
You know, curl up with a bottle of gin.
Then pie.
Well, uh, my brother's having everybody out to his place to eat and pray. That might be cool.
What is that, like a half-ass Duncan version of an invitation?
Alright.
Alright, a big family Thanksgiving. Count me in, I'll do it.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Good. Aw, good, 'cause I needed a ride.
Such an asshole.
I just wanna watch one of these big bitches crash already. Wouldn't that be cool?
Well, Beavis, you're aiming at the wrong bitches.
That is, the big bitches have a base proportional to the height. You can't break 'em. You should aim for the little bitches on the side.
You love these icicles, don't you?
I just like knowin' how things are put together, how they're built.
What, like an architect?
You could do that.
Well no, architecture is more about how things look and I don't give a shit how things look.
I like how they're designed, and engineered.
Which is why I like this bridge.
Some things are built to last, and some things just fall apart.
Which one are you?
Aww, I can't believe it.
Can't believe you got one before I did.
Kind of embarrassing.
Grampa? Grampa.
What's going on?
I wanted to watch the Today Show.
Well you're scaring grandma.
Bull shit.
Ruth! Ruth!
She's downstairs in the lobby right now crying.
For Christ's sakes.
Did you actually tell her that I was going to buy you shotgun shells?
- That was between her and me. - Well congratulations, I'm in the middle of it now.
- And what the hell is this? - Yeah yeah yeah. It's empty.
Well then what are you doing with it?
Give me a shell.
- What? - Just need one.
This is what you wanted, right? You wanted your TV so you threw a tantrum.
My brother I shoulda.
Sterling your...
Life of the party, he was. Couldn't put together two words at the end. They put him in one of them...
He didn't know where he was.
Thought he was living at the airport.
- I shoulda, he would have thanked me. - Well, I know exactly where you are.
You're in your living room with your team.
You got what you wanted. Are you happy now?
Because now you gotta do two things for me.
First, stop scaring grandma with this shit.
If you do this again I swear old man, I will beat you senseless.
What's the other thing?
I want you to go to Jake's for Thanksgiving.
I don't like people seeing me like this.
Is that what this is about? You're embarrased?
I'm not embarrassed, you little shit.
Not of me. This isn't me. You think this is me?
Alright, that should do it.
There you go.
Just like new.
Hold on.
Always trying to steal. Rob ya blind unless you catch 'em. Sneaky bastards.
You have a lovely day Mrs. Hollerich.
- I just don't know about this. I mean the recipe I got it was from a woman with ALS. - Okay don't worry about it.
It's not like anybody was going to eat 'em anyhow.
I'm sorry. That was a bad joke. I was just kidding.
Okay but maybe we shouldn't do this. It just doesn't feel right and they might not like
- what I made and I don't even fucking like sweet potatoes. - Hey, calm down, you're nervious.
I get that it's your first big family Thanksgiving dinner but
I got your back, I promise. And if we sit down, you don't like it, lemme know, and I will whisk you away to safety.
- I promise. Okay? - Okay.
Deep breath.
- You good to go? - Mm Hmm.
Excellent.
- Yuck. - Oh.
Hey, girls. Happy Thanksgiving!
Daddy,
Uncle Duncan's here.
What, no hug?
Hey. Alright, go play.
What's up, shithead. Happy Thanksgiving.
- Hi, you must be Kate. Nice to meet you. - Hi, I brought sweet potatoes.
Great, well come on in, I'll get you a drink.
I'm such a fan of stuffing. You want some more?
She's gonna have to put him in a home soon. You know that. Look at him.
He's fine, Jake. Just takes a little Patience.
Okay.
- Cara, this is Turkey is amazing. - Oh, yeah.
I hope so. I've been basting it for two days.
Wow.
Sweet potatoes are good.
Duncan?
Grampa's boots had some mud on them, so now there's a mess in the foyer.
Okay, I'll take care of that as soon as I can.
Thank you.
So, you're in a new place on the river.
How do you like it?
Why is he talking like that?
We just love it, Tom, we love it.
Yeah, there's some great views out there of the river, both skylines.
- The girls love the elevator. - Fantastic.
At night
you can see the northern lights.
Northern lights. Really.
I've seen them up north in Canada, but down here?
You can see them down here sometimes.
This time of year in the city...
- He sees them so obviously they're there. - D? Look, he sees them from the balcony.
Hey, he sees them; It doesn't matter.
Is it really important?
Sorry, grandma.
Do you know that there is some tribal dancing that relieves stress?
You have open your chest, kinda.
Could be reflected city lights. Ronald...
- you sure? - Yeah.
Yeah, I'm sure. I lived up north seventy years.
You think I never saw northern lights, you think I don't know what they look like?
I know what they are, you jackass.
I saw 'em. I see 'em.
Turkey's a little dry.
I loved it. I loved every minute of it.
The family tension and the sweaters and the
the little marshmallows on the dessert.
It could have been worse, my mom could have been there.
Yeah, where is she?
She moved down to Florida when Jake went to college.
I was actually supposed to move in with her after dad died, but...
How could I go to Florida?
There's no hockey down there.
Well, it would be nice to visit her.
I wouldn't know, actually.
Because Jake takes his family down there, but I only see her when she comes up for a couple weeks in the summer.
She hates the winters up here.
Yeah, I can't say I blame her.
I mean it's not even December
and my nipples are so hard they could cut glass.
Is that a warning?
I don't know.
It's running good, all the electricals. I changed the oil too. Don't mention it.
And you gotta watch that radiator.
I filled it but it's gotta slow leak.
Good to know. Thank you.
What is up with you? Are you high?
No.
I had too much Turkey, it makes me giddy.
Mmm. I remember when I used to get giddy.
Stu?
You know how some days when you wake up the world just seems right?
- You know, everything comes together, just feels like. - Holy...
You got laid.
Huh.
So, is it dangerous?
Just if you walk by it.
Or look at it.
I, look, I'll just throw a couple brackets under there to distribute the weight more evenly.
And by the time I'm finished you'll be able to store a herd of elephants up there.
My, that should be handy.
How's your grampa?
He's doing fine.
You know, you're really missing out, staying in one place.
You're missing Chile rellenos in Boston.
You're missing crab cakes in Baltimore.
Uh, Brooklyn bagels, grits in Georgia.
You're just naming food.
I know, I'm hungry.
Then what's the next place?
I like right here, right now.
Just until you're done stalking Westerberg, right?
Hey listen, restraining orders mean nothing to me.
I actually have friends who've seen him at the Wally's Roast Beef down in Bloomington.
Oh my God, that's amazing. You have friends?
Well, just the guys I've been hanging around with since the fourth grade.
Yeah I know. When am I gonna meet these guys?
Ah, hope the snow keeps up.
Probably take the sleds out tomorrow.
You're gonna go sledding?
Duncan, that is so quaint, that's so nineteenth century.
Can I come?
I can't feel my toes.
I think some skin came off with that.
My teeth are so frozen.
- I love you. - No I love you.
He's eighty two.
But he's still pretty active.
I mean he fishes, and complains about the government, anyway.
My grandfather's just sitting out on his balcony watching the northern lights.
Waiting for the end.
Hey hey.
What's in it?
We don't know. Hacksetter makes it.
He calls it firewater.
Oh, careful.
Ugh.
Dr. Pepper and Robitussin.
Nice, here I'll take some of that.
You know a lot of Indian tribes.
Oh Jesus, Hack, don't pull that Indian shit on me.
No, this is serious man, I've done
lots of research on it.
Lot of tribes feel that when person is ready
they just die.
They, uh, fulfilled their missions and
taught all their lessons and uh,
they're ready to move onto the next world.
You still see their souls passing
the northern lights.
They sort of just quietly
expire.
You're full of shit. That's the old Indian guy from "The Outlaw Josie Wales." I've seen that movie.
Okay it was pretty cool though, you gotta admit.
This Indian shit works. Even you kinda wanted a little Hacksetter action, didn't ya.
You know, Kate, and excuse the impertinence of this question, but.
What the hell are you doin' with Duncan?
Yeah, I mean haven't you noticed that you're
way out of his league.
Hey listen guys, I tell him that all the time.
I mean we're his best friends so we know what a fuck-up he really is.
Wow, did you ever think it might not help to have his best friends calling him a fuck-up?
- What, what do you mean, we made him drop out of school and piss his life away? - I destroyed his life?
- No, that was Michak. - Oh come on, don't be so hard on him.
He was the best hockey player I ever played with.
He was skating varsity in the eighth grade. He could have had a scholarship pay for college right there.
He just quit. He had so much potential and he just quit.
- Why did he quit? - I don't know. Drive you crazy trying to figure out why that guy does anything. - I got my theory.
- Oh yeah? - Yeah.
Yeah?
You know when you're a teenager
and you rebel against your parents,
shave your head, Pierce your ass, that kind of crap?
Everybody does. Everybody does it.
But Dunc
never got a chance to rebel because
his dad, when his dad died he was still god to him,
and that's what happens when your god dies.
Wow, Lindy.
That's tremendously profound.
Why don't you lick my ball sack, Finn.
- Oh. - Oh, would you like that?
Ball sack is never really necessary,
to say, out loud, you know? Now I'm going to have.
Balls. Balls.
Got it!
Oh, Jesus.
Oops.
- Do you want me to drive? I don't mind driving at all. - No! I'm good.
People keep warning me about you.
Dunc.
I can't believe I'm having sex with a guy named Dunc.
But I can't believe I'm having sex, period.
Ha, aww.
How did your father die?
Um, the usual way. He stop breathing.
Keep your eyes on the road. It gets really icy here in the winter.
- It's dangerous. - How old were you?
I was 15 and he was 39.
And he died of a heart attack.
God that's so young.
Yeah, you think?
Oh?
It is young, but
it was the lifestyle that he was living.
It was the eighties and his business was doing really good so
you know why save all that money when you can shovel it up your nose.
But he was, you know, he was in rehab for the
last couple of years.
He got sober but that night he just went over to his buddy's, to his house and
was playing poker... look watch out... slow down
- I can drive. - I know you can drive, but people go into this ditch all the time. I can see the road.
- Okay. It's just... - It's gone.
He died. He went to his buddy's, to his house and
he was playing poker with his old drug buddies and Stu was his dealer, and he died.
And...
I think
it's possible that
maybe he did a couple of lines with the guys that night knowing that it would have killed him.
I dunno. I just...
Stu's the only guy who really knows what happened.
And uh,
And I've never had the balls to ask him because I think I'm a little afraid of what the truth might be.
Yeah.
Why did you tell me that about your dad?
Thanks for telling me.
Kate.
- Kate. - Hey.
Uh, god.
- I'm sorry I'm late. - You have to make it up to me the hard way.
How about some brownies from Mrs. Nigard in room 704?
A little harder than that.
- Really? - Yeah.
Okay. You know, you really shouldn't be out here by yourself in this neighborhood.
Really? Well you know ain't nobody gonna mess with a girl who's carrying a copy of Bullitt.
With Steve McQueen.
Why is it that we can't go to your place, again?
I like your place. It's got nice lighting, and...
Hey Jake, what's up?
Oh.
Kate, this is Sandy. Sandy, this is Kate.
Hi.
Hi Sandy.
What are you doing, D?
We got a video so we came to watch the video.
Steve McQueen.
Lotta action.
- We should go. - Yeah. - Okay. - Yeah.
Oh, you guys are leaving. That's terrible.
- Sorry, have fun. - Okay.
Wow. That is creepy.
That kinda reminds me that Jack Lemmon movie where he lends his apartment to the boss.
That's where he got the idea.
And you let him do this because...
I work at Wentworth sometimes. It's a good nursing home.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Good. Maybe I'll move there.
I think I'm getting a touch of the A-bomb myself.
You know Ruth isn't going to be able to take care of him much longer.
Just in the last month his dementia has progressed.
I dummo. He seemed pretty good today.
Ready for the movie?
Wait what is this? University of Minneapolis?
I'm so impressed with you.
Dingus McDonkey?
Address: 666 Your Ass.
That's smart. Why all the juvenile shit?
Because, I started filling it out, and it's stupid.
You need a bunch of random bullshit for it: Your high school transcripts
recommendations, you gotta write a fucking essay, it's just dumb.
Plus, I probably wouldn't get in anyhow.
Maybe you wouldn't.
But Dingus definitely won't.
You know the great thing about Dingus McDonkey?
He's a real bobcat in the sack.
Hey, it's a joke.
Yeah, exactly.
It's a joke.
Ha ha ha.
You're actually really good at these exercises, Ronny.
And your legs are quite strong.
Those used to be like tree trunks.
Now does this hurt, or are you pretending like you did last time?
Oh god. Everything hurts.
Ha.
Alright.
Point and flex, you know the drill.
The day you met Duncan.
I just pretended to fall out of the chair
so he'd come and help me and you'd see what
a good guy he is,
helping an old man.
Well it worked, you crafty old matchmaker you.
You're good for him.
Like you are with me and these exercises.
He needs someone being hard on him.
You've gotta help him.
I'm not sure I know how to help him, Ronny.
Yes, you do.
Just keep on at him like you been doin'.
You and me.
We'll help him, Katie.
You're cheating, Gunderson. I know you are, you're hiding cards, aren't you?
Take his oxygen tank.
You ARE cheating, you old son of a bitch.
And under your ass too, that's disgusting.
We've been playing in this place for years.
Yeah you'll probably be playing for another couple of decades.
Ha ha, at least until Finn runs his dad's business into the ground.
Hey, you remember my friend Anna?
- Yeah, Anna from San Diego right? - Yeah.
She called me the other night. She wanted me to
to move.
Move where, to San Diego?
Yeah, there's this couple and they're
going to Europe for a year, and their house-sitter fell through so she wanted to know if I want to stay there.
And it's like a couple blocks from the beach, so there's gonna be ocean and sunshine and fish tacos.
What do you think?
San Diego so great why are those people leavin'?
Because people go places, Duncan.
Look what the cat dragged in. A Duncan.
Your girlfriend's here, right?
Fuck you, take the goddamn game seriously.
We're on the same team.
Hey, what's wrong with you. Laugh!
Get off me. What's wrong with you, anyway... It's a goddamn game.
Let's go get a beer, Finn.
Why don't you come?
So then that's it. You've made up your mind.
No, um, but I would have to be there in January.
Um, what are you going to do for work?
I am a healthcare professional. So there's always sick people.
What, I don't get this, Kate. How you can,
how you can pack up everything that you have here and just leave it behind.
What do I have here besides you?
Why, that's not enough?
Oh.
Okay, that's not enough, well that's good to know.
I don't know, I thought you were joking.
No, I'm being serious. Surprise!
- Okay, well I can't tell what's what's serious to you. - I'm being serious right now.
I just watched you get in a fight like a 12-year-old.
And that guy was on the same team as you.
Well he had it fucking coming. He was being a jackass, and that's not the point that's hockey.
- You don't even know hockey. - It's such bullshit.
Why are you trying to pick a fight with me? This is stupid.
You know what? Have a good time in San Diego. I'm going home. It's too cold for this.
- I thought we were having an adult conversation. - Good night!
Quit sulking, Ronald.
Duncan is going to take you to the store tomorrow.
I thought we'd play cards, penny a point, quarter a game.
You used to love cards.
You had a lot of interests. You know, you liked woodworking and hunting and dancing.
Huh.
We used to go dancing every Saturday night.
At the Legion.
But I never had an interest in it, sweetheart.
You loved dancing.
I loved being close to you.
Holding your hand.
That's all.
I had an interest in you.
Just holding your hand.
I love you, sweetheart.
I love you too.
I need no soft lights
to enchant me.
It's true.
Only Grant me.
The right.
To hold you ever so tight.
And to feel in the night.
The nearness of you.
Just about.
I'll go on balcony in December. Very cold.
I gotta bird feeder out there. For the birds, and some squirrels.
Okay.
There you go, all finished.
- I dunno how exactly he could have taken anything. You were with him the whole time. - Sneaky.
- Thief! This is mine! Thief. I'm calling the police. - I don't know how that got in there, Mrs. Hollerich.
My husband's medals. Thief. Robbing me blind.
But you know I didn't take that tin. It was an accident.
Not to crazy woman. She sees you taking, that's only thing that matters.
If she calls the police you are fired.
I am fired.
I'm sorry, my friend, I'm sorry.
The woman is just a nightmare. She only keeps that there because she's crazy. Honestly, who keeps stuff hidden under the kitchen sink?
She's lonesome, Duncan, not crazy. Do you want me to talk to her? I can try.
No, forget it. There's no point. Look, I've,
I've been fired from better jobs than this one.
I was only here because of him.
So you're just going to give up?
Why should I put up with all this shit?
- But she said you stole a box of medals. - But I didn't steal anything.
- That's what I'm telling you, grandma. I didn't steal a thing. For once in my life I didn't actually do anything wrong. - I know but they'll say you did.
- And I didn't raise you just to accept. - No, you're right. You didn't raise me. You didn't, my dad didn't.
My mother certainly fucking didn't.
So you tell me, who did? Who raised me because they did a crap job.
Let's go blow the stink off.
So that's it.
- She's leaving me here and she's going to San Diego. - San Diego?
- That's where the war is. - Uh, yeah, we're going to be closing up in about five minutes. Do you two need anything?
You got shotgun shells?
Don't listen to him, we're fine. We'll be outta your hair in a sec.
You know if you were serious about this suicide business you wouldn't need shotgun shells.
Just drop a toaster in the tub or throw yourself off the balcony.
Why don't you go?
- What's that? - Why can't you go to San Diego?
Because I got things here, grampa.
All my friends are here, Jake and the girls, you and grandma.
Ruth.
She can take care of herself damned well, believe me.
You got a raw deal kiddo.
Your dad.
Think about him, how he died.
I didn't, didn't help him.
He needed me.
I shoulda helped him.
He's gone.
What were we talking about?
Yeah, alright.
I'm the mayor.
Hump.
- Ok, bye. - Bye.
- I'm thinking maybe you're right. - Jesus Christ. D.
What are you doing?
I know it's sad, D, but it'd be better for him.
He's suicidal.
Yeah right, can you see him jumping off the balcony?
He asked me to buy him shotgun shells.
Anybody who talks about killing themselves isn't really going to do it.
Whadda you know about it, anyway?
- I think dad would have done it. - For the love of fuck, D, would you just shut up about dad? He's not here. It doesn't matter what he would have done.
You know something. He never made good decisions when he was.
Well, he'd have known what to do.
Yeah, he was just a man, Duncan.
Hey.
Last week, did you tell Kate what was going on? With Sandy?
I can't let you use my apartment anymore.
I just don't feel good about it.
She think I'm a scumbag?
I don't know, Jacob.
You think you're a scumbag?
You're freezing, you want to go inside?
No, the cold is good for you. It's invigorating.
My dad used to say that when you can
see your breath it means you're still alive.
Okay, so Kate, look, I've been thinking,
and
you can't leave yet.
You just you can't go okay, you can't go to San Diego.
Because whatever it is that you're running from we can take care of it here.
- You can solve it here. - Whatever I'm running from? I'm not running from anything. I'm running to things, to opportunity. No, I'm I'm calling bullshit on that because
to run to something you have to run from somewhere.
And that, that's what you do Kate.
You you you run away from places because it's easier for you. You're not attached to anything so you never get hurt, right?
I mean, be honest. Is there a guy like me in every town?
I don't think there's a guy like you anywhere.
You can always come with me, you know.
To San Diego.
Somebody else actually suggested that too, but...
he's losing his mind.
What's keeping you here? Your friends?
The Vikings? Your misguided sense of loyalty?
Kate,
I'm loyal because these people stay.
They stay here and I like things the way that they are.
The way they are or the way that they were?
Look, you said it yourself, this is a good place.
Yes it is, but you'd have to go to other places to know that.
Do you think your father would want you to stay here for eternity, chained to his memory, chained to your grampa?
That's not loyalty Duncan, that's just being afraid.
- You know what? Fuck you Kate. - Why?
You don't...
You just...
You think this is fun for me?
Saying goodbye?
I liked you before I even met you.
From Ruthie's pictures and Ronald's stories.
And then when I met you...
you remember that?
It was just familiar.
I don't know why.
Hey grampa.
Grampa?
Grampa!
Hey.
You okay?
David?
No grampa, it's Duncan.
Duncan?
Duncan Duncan Duncan.
Oh Christ. Oh.
You'd think they could have stayed open a bit longer for the mayor, huh?
Whoa.
Well.
What do you say we go buy a Christmas present for grandma?
- Christmas? - Yeah.
Yeah.
Disgusting, isn't it?
- I need, uh. - What?
- What? Whaddya need? - The place. Where I go.
A bathroom?
- Yes, urinal. Urinal. Urinal. - Ok, hold on. Hurry. Goddamn fountains.
I should get you a handicap parking sticker.
My legs are frozen.
You alright? I'll be right outside this door.
The zipper, the zipper.
Oh God I'm sorry kiddo.
I'm going, I'm going and I can't stop.
I can't stop.
I got it. I got it. Okay.
Alright. Tilt down a little bit.
Okay.
You got it from here?
- Ahhhhhhhhhhhh. - Aw Jesus. Okay. There we go. There we go.
I'm done.
Yeah?
You don't need to wring it out, you know.
Christ, I gotta go wash my hands.
Gotta wash my dick.
I don't know where your hand's been.
Alright, let's get you home. Unless you actually want to do some more Christmas shopping.
Soaking wet. I gotta change my pants.
Uncle Duncan!
Ooh. Hey. Hey... Hi.
What are you doing?
Uhh, just doing a little Christmas shopping with grampa.
No, I mean what are you doing, you doing here? You're supposed to be up north hunting.
Oh yeah, yeah. The hunting trip.
Yeah, hey girls, why don't you give your grampa a hug?
- Say hi to grampa. - I'm all wet, sweetheart, I spilled my coffee.
So.
What happened?
Why, I couldn't go.
I lost my job and uh,
I've been helping out with grandma and grampa which takes up a bunch of time, so I couldn't make it.
Yeah, Jacob didn't um,
mention that to me, so.
I just...
Say goodbye to your grandfather, please.
- Bye grampa. - Bye girls, bye. Bye grampa.
Oh, it's good to see you.
Bye bye.
- Bye. - Merry Christmas.
What's her name?
Cara.
It could have been worse.
Yeah.
I coulda shit myself. Sterling did that all the time at the end.
Like a goddamn baby.
Alright, up you go.
He would have told me to do it.
Put him out of his misery.
- But he lost his sense. - Well, you haven't lost your sense, old man.
Those moments come, kiddo.
Faster and faster.
Before you know it, it'll be all the time.
Like under water.
Then I won't have the brains to
ask you to help me.
Oh, for Christ sakes, enough of this, old man.
- Think of grandma. - I am.
Imagine what that woman could do
- she didn't have me dragging her down. - I gotta get you ready, she's going to be home soon.
Yeah she's out at class, trying to live.
I'm like a dead weight.
Holding her back from her life, David.
Stop doing that.
This is David. I'm Duncan. I know you know the difference, old man.
Stop doing that.
I loved him.
I wasn't a good enough father to him, Duncan.
Nothing's been the same.
He's gone, isn't he?
Yes.
Yes, he's gone, grampa.
He would have helped me.
He loved me.
He would have pulled the goddamn
trigger if I'd asked him to.
Oh.
Grampa, what are you doing out there. It's freezing.
Grampa.
This reminds me of the porch out here.
Remember the porch?
We used to sit out there eating ice cream, you and me and Jake.
Jake always went inside early.
You'd stay on the porch with me.
Look at 'em dance.
- Look at what, the stars? - The lights. The northern lights.
Aurora.
Aurora
Aurora Borealis, grampa.
Colors are good tonight,
just like they used to be on the porch up north.
Your dad.
Only way I could get him to sit still.
He loved the lights.
Sit and watch him.
- Okay, let's go inside. - If I was an eskimo. Please grampa, let's go inside. - If I was an eskimo.
I'd just walk out into the snow and go to sleep.
That's what they do up there, the old ones.
Just walk out into the lights.
It's what's expected. You're a wonderful skater, Duncan.
You're a wonderful skater.
Tell Santa Claus what you want, David.
His house is there, underneath the lights. You tell the lights.
Your dad, he loved the lights.
Just to sit and watch. The lights take the cold away.
Cold.
Like Chris.
Coming off ice.
I can walk out onto the ice.
Tell Santa Claus what you want, David.
His house is there,
underneath the lights. You tell the lights.
Tell him out loud.
What you want.
You want a sled.
Duncan.
Oh Christ.
Duncan. Oh.
Move the chair there, against the wall.
Back it up against the wall. I don't want to make a mess.
Christ, kiddo, don't cry.
This is the best gift you could have
given me.
I love you Duncan. I love you.
Take off my sock, will you?
Take off my sock, that's how they do it.
With the toe.
Oh Christ.
Thank you.
Oh thank you.
Look my goddamn hands are shakin' too much. I can't hold the gun.
Hold it for me will ya?
Oh. I love you, kid.
Move it away, move it away a little. I've got to get my leg up.
That's a boy, that's a good boy.
Okay, good boy. Now when I get my
toe set,
you give the gun back to me,
get the hell outta here.
You tell Ruth...
No!
- Jesus Christ. - I can't do this for you, grampa.
Duncan, it was my shell.
Oh.
Ronald, I'm home.
Ronald?
Oh...
Ronald?
Ron?
Oh, it's alright.
It's alright.
It's alright, Ronald.
- Grandma? Hey, grandma! Grampa! - He's gone, Duncan.
Duncan.
It's alright.
It's okay.
He's gone now.
Oh. God.
Kate?
Kate!
Kate.
Let us give a moment of silence.
Amen.
- Hey Kate? Can you help with the car, please? - Okay.
Did you know I come up here?
When I'm ever, um,
out fishing at a cabin or whatever.
Oh yeah, four, five times a year.
Nah, I never knew that.
Oh yeah, yeah. Sort of a motivational thing for me.
Everything I've ever done I've done to make him proud.
Make this
block of granite proud.
School. The job.
Cara and the girls. All for him.
Lately, I don't think he'd be so proud.
So I needed to see this, you know?
Remind myself that...
And you, you fuckin' idiot, you need to remind yourself of this.
It was a long time ago, Duncan.
Quit
wasting your shit, you know. Do something. Make him proud.
Make 'em both proud.
- He'd have been proud of you, Jake. - Yeah.
Ah.
Oh yeah, I uh, I need a place to stay for a few months.
Oh.
Hey. Come here, man.
Okay, so here's my address where I'm going to be for the next twelve months.
And I expect you to write.
Or you could just
stop by one day.
Maybe I'll do that.
You know, when your nipples thaw.
Laughs.
I got this for you.
So you can start your collection.
You're gonna make me cry.
I don't know which one is me.
That's you right there.
- That looks like Finn. - No, that's Finn.
That's you.
Okay.
Duncan, I know you think I just
breeze through these towns and I never get hurt, but...
It really hurts to leave you here.
And this is just a place, you know.
Asshole!
Please don't let that be the last word I ever hear you say.
Prick!
Much better.
Okay.
Kate!
It's all yours, Stu.
Right.
Put in a little extra for you, you know?
In case you need some help.
Thanks, Stu.
Anything to help, peckerwood.
You know that.
- Hey Stu? - Yeah?
The night that my dad died.
Was he doing cocaine?
Is that what killed him?
No.
Not at all.
I need to know that that's the truth.
Please.
Yeah.
I tried to get him to do a few lines but um,
that night
he was scared man.
He was so much fun when he got high, but...
I dunno.
He didn't want to do anything, you know, he was afraid
he thought that
if he did something he'd leave you and your brother
behind and
that would be not so good, you know.
So,
you two were the only thing in his life you know that.
We all flipped him shit, and uh,
it got real heated.
Then uh,
we got all worked up and stormed out.
I found him face down on the driveway.
My best friend
and I.
I called.
Okay.
That was a long time ago.
So, turns out they got a pretty good engineering school here in San Diego.
I can't believe.