You all know that strange species of animal commonly called "student".
It's a happy creature, optimistic, merry and even has a soul.
Well, you'll certainly be interested to know there was once a teacher
who devoted his whole life to studying the mysteries of the student soul.
He collected the results of his research in a book that he called
JOURNEY TO THE DEPTHS OF THE STUDENT'S SOUL
29 January 1939
A strange case.
I've managed to get hold
of a love letter by a third-year.
It shows an emotional maturity
unusual in a boy his age.
Love letters.
Improper correspondence.
Joke letters.
Rude notes to teachers.
a) With picture. b) Without picture.
Reading below the bench. Serious literature.
Literature for the girls.
Adventure.
Student warriors' weapons of the 20th century.
Trophy from the battle for the toilets of 2 April 1937.
A group of fifth-years, led by the repeater Pavlasek
this day occupied the main toilet area, and defended it against
superior forces of the seventh-years until the second bell.
Only at the intervention of two members of staff did the unit
surrender and clean up the area and adjoining cabins.
Major losses on both sides: three expulsions,
sixteen detentions and one conditional expulsion.
- I'm not disturbing you, Mr. Rabiska? - Not at all. Come in.
Good day to you, Mr. Matulka.
- I've something very interesting for you. - Again?
Read this.
"Esteemed Miss,
before beginning my letter please accept my heartfelt compliments."
So, Zdimera's got a girlfriend.
Please notice, a third-year, and how interestingly he writes.
I do notice. Very interesting. He even writes "i" as "y".
"You must forgive me for wryting to you." I'd forgive him that,
but not ascomycetes. Last year he didn't know a single one.
It's true his spelling's awful, but the sentiment he expresses is very fine.
Very fine. For example this:
"You are my only joy. When I meet you I'm filled with delight".
What a rascal.
"I end this letter with my compliments and the hope that I might be fortunate
enough to be loved by you. Your unknown Zdimera Josef, 3.B."
I think this collection is the only one of its type.
The sports sector in particular is making excellent progress.
Exercise, all of you together, one, two, three and four.
Bend to the left and back, and bend to the right and back,
and left and back, and right and back.
Don't stop, keep exercising, inhale deeply.
Don't stop, hold it until the end.
And enough.
Now stand up straight and put your hands at your sides.
Raise your right knee, extend your leg, and then down.
Bend your left knee, stretch and down.
Extend your right, back. Extend your left, back.
Kick out sharply with your right. Kick out sharply with your left.
Right, kick. Left, kick.
Goooooal!
I'll give you goal!
It's time you got up. Today you've got your half-yearly school report.
Look at Mr. Midloch over there.
Midloch here. Good morning, Mrs. Kulikova.
- Come on, get up. It's half past seven. - Half past seven?
Don't get in my way, poet! Those are my socks!
Mummy, hurry, my best clothes! Or I'll be late for school.
HALF-YEARLY REPORT
Quiet!
- What's all this about, Kulik? - Please sir, it was only a joke.
Sit down, you rascal, I can do without your welcomes.
Quiet! Be seated.
Horror contained in this file exceeded even the medieval torture books!
As usual, only Mazanek and Chalupova didn't disappoint.
Mazanek.
Except for P.E. you've got straight As.
Mazanek, the P.E.'s holding you back a little. You should try harder.
- Yes, sir. - Good.
Thank you, sir.
Quiet.
You'll have to get a home instructor in P.E.
And now a proof of how far a seventh-year can fall.
That'll be me.
Kulik, you've scored worse marks in every subject,
except behavior and P.E. Terrible. You footballer.
You should use Chalupova as an example.
Chalupova again has a distinction.
So, just keep on.
Here is an example of how important it is to concentrate at school.
And don't read under the bench like Peterka, for example!
Unlucky boy, why do you trouble yourself with Latin and Maths?
Is there any point? In the seventh class?
Go to the third class and see how a school report should look!
- Zdimera. - Here.
The teaching staff have decided you should receive a class telling-off.
Your mark for behavior has been reduced by one degree.
You certainly know why, Zdimera.
Because I've been naughty and whispered.
Naughty, whispered, but above all writing.
You've written to a girl, and what's more during class time.
- Please sir, I didn't mean it like that. - Then how did you mean it, Josá?
Quiet.
- Well? - Please sir, I don't have a girlfriend.
- Then why did you write it? - Please sir, for a joke.
School is not for joking, school is a serious matter. Sit down.
You must live and breath for school, you must... and so on.
- What do you live for, Zdimera? - Please sir, for sport.
The talented poet and writer Midloch.
Instead of writing bad poems,
I suggest you pay more attention to homework and composition.
Ah, Posusta. Less elegance and fewer ironed trousers,
less wit in clothes and more wit in your head.
So we don't have to elegantly repeat each year twice. Please.
Sima. The pilot Sima.
I'd recommend you do a little less flying and keep your feet
on the ground instead. The plusperfect is a problem.
Be careful you don't have a nasty accident at the end of the school year.
Vanek.
Vanek, Vanek, I worry about you, boy.
Music has squeezed all the maths out of your head.
Pause, boy, pause. And put your foot on the pedal when studying.
Tempo. Tempo furioso.
Well.
It's good to have so many hobbies in one class,
but you see yourselves where it's leading.
The most gifted pupils and you're failing.
So finish with the hobbies and start studying.
Study, while there's still time. Forget about all the rest!
What's going on? Who ordered you to stand?
- What does this mean, Kulik? - Psss.
Two minutes silence for the fallen, sir.
What silence? Out. Everybody out.
Make use of your half-term and study. Make your parents happy.
Just look at it. That's nice. Your Dad's going to be happy.
We've got a tough match ahead. What if we kicked the ball out of play?
I'm not playing anything. Tell me, what good is the football, anyway?
- Where do you want to take it? - I'm adding to the sport's fame.
I'm a pioneer. A promising centre forward. A great chance.
Mummy, you've got to help me. Pass it to Dad somehow.
- It wasn't me who failed. - Mummy...
Come on, Mum, look, I've got a match.
Well, it seems you're going to have two matches.
I suggest you to go to Dad first and try to sort it out with him.
- For goodness sake, boy, it's five Es. - I know.
- What are they from? - Maths and French.
Well, it's not that bad. You don't have to worry.
I'm no friend of record performances in study.
Anyway, if you improve by the end of the year I'll increase your allowance.
- Compris? - Compris. We'll try, boss.
- Hello, Dad. - What's up?
- I'm losing by a lot at half-time. - How much?
- Five nil. - In what?
Maths, French, Czech, history and biology.
Home, on the double. For prize-giving.
Stop!
Sir, you've passed the metal barrier. That'll be a ten crown fine.
- For such a small thing? - You don't read novels when driving.
- What? Me reading novels? - Oh, excuse me, sir.
Your son's report. I understand. Proceed, please.
Thank you.
Jenda, Dad wants to have a word with you.
- Right away, just let me finish playing. - You've already finished.
Come on, gentlemen. Take it away.
Hello.
- Where are they taking the piano? - The piano's been sold.
Darling.
That's for your school report. So you'll have more time for study.
I told you that if you did badly we'd get rid of the piano.
And do you think now I'll pass with honors?
No, I don't. But you can pass. You've got the ability.
And if not, then you'll sweat at it until steam comes out of your ears.
One, two.
Ladicek, come for a walk with your father.
Wait, Mummy, just ten more. One, two, one, two, one, two.
That's how a knee-bend should look, sir. Firm, flexible and balanced.
I can't give a seventh-year a pass if he falls down during a knee-bend.
Couldn't you turn a blind eye when it comes to Mazanek?
When it comes to Mazanek maybe, but not to his knee-bends.
- Come now... - Sorry sir, but a knee-bend is a knee-bend.
I also inform the teachers' meeting
that the abuse of reading under the bench is spreading.
I believe that it was our colleagues Mr. Seda who complained.
- I'm sorry? - Do you wish to say something?
Yes. Or rather, that is... No.
I see.
I think we've covered everything.
It only remains for me to announce that a new colleague has been appointed
to our school, professor Vorisek, who will be taking Latin and Czech.
That ends the meeting. I wish you all pleasant half-term holidays.
Likewise, sir.
Mr. Matulka, could I have a word?
When are you going to take that final state examination?
I don't mean to put pressure on you, but it's about time, you know.
I can't take it yet, sir. I'm not properly prepared.
- Perhaps you just underestimate yourself. - Sir, there's a lot of material,
and I haven't studied everything yet. I'm only at the hundred and fiftieth
family of insects. But I'm not complaining.
It is, after all, my only source of entertainment.
A propos of entertainment... Gentlemen, just one moment.
Tonight is the students' ball. Would any of you mind supervising the event?
- Perhaps Mr. Turik? - Yes, sir. I'd be happy to.
Please take your places, ladies and gentlemen, for the waltz.
Musicians, one, two, three...
- Mazanek, why are you dawdling here? - I don't have a girl, sir.
Your shirt isn't ironed, you don't wear gym shorts, you don't have a girl,
yet you want me to give you a pass in P.E. Go and dance the waltz.
Please sir, I don't know how to dance the waltz. I prepared for the polka.
That's no excuse. Get a girl and join the dance.
Why aren't you dancing?
I can't. The club doctor said I wasn't allowed to.
- Aha, so what are you doing here? - I came to have a look at my fellows
and see how they dance. - Fine, you can. But behave yourself.
Don't stand by the door like a thief. Look after the social side of things.
Thank you.
- Hello, what's up? - What did he say?
I'm meant to look after the social side of things.
- The social side of the evening? - I have to supervise the thing.
He asked me to supervise the social side.
- Well, Kulik, what did I tell you? - Yes, sir.
Roll up, boys! In line! Free entertainment! Amuse the ladies!
Voilá.
Doctor Kulik, may I?
No, Zdenka, it's not good.
I've almost written the thing but I don't have anywhere to play it.
Why don't you go and compose it in the café?
The café? Father will see me and throw me out of the house.
What if he does? A pianist like you will always find somewhere to go.
- You'd play and even earn money. - And forget about school, right?
No, that's no good. You know what my maths is like.
Everything's possible, Honza. You've just got to learn to fight for it.
Look boys, that Chalupova's really a very pretty girl. She looks
- totally different than in class. - Fantastic.
She deserves someone with far more style than Mr. Vanek.
Someone like you, eh? Steal the girls and badmouth your friends.
Attention, we're repeating the waltz.
Once more unto the floor, free, flowing and lissome.
Musicians, one, two, three...
- May I have the pleasure? - Shall we dance, Zdenka?
- So many dancers all of a sudden. - Excuse me, I was first.
And anyway, you don't ask a lady to dance in such a banal way.
Will you permit me, dear lady?
What's got into you?
Do not speak to me in such a tone when in society.
Are you serious?
My dear man, you talk like someone from the lower orders.
Bigmouth.
- You hack musician! - Boys, stop it!
Gentlemen, gentlemen, careful!
I'm responsible for order here and I won't have any rows!
- Stop it, Vojta. - No lousy musician will insult me!
- What did you say? - Enough! Sort this out elsewhere, boys.
Follow me without making a fuss. My respects, madam.
- Good, good, Mazanek, keep going. - Thank you, sir.
Fair play, gentlemen.
It's nothing to do with you, keep out. I'll handle this piano thumper myself.
Say that again! Don't get involved, Vojta.
I will get involved. I'll give you piano thumper.
Kulik! Who instructed you to do this?
Sir, you said I should keep order.
Order yes, but not to fight. That's not why I made you organizer.
Please sir, I organized this dispute.
Please sir, Kulik stood up for me against Posusta.
- Posusta? - He said I was a piano thumper.
- Is that true? - Yes, sir...
Quiet. I don't want to hear anything. We'll investigate this in school.
Now go and clean yourselves up.
- Sir. - What is it?
Please sir, should I continue to look after the social level?
Not in that state, no. You cheeky boy.
Fighting over a girl
is a normal feature
of adolescent youths.
In our case two seventh-years came to blows.
It was an extremely rare example,
as the reason for the brawl was a fellow pupil.
What does this mean?
- I asked what is the meaning of this! - Sir, we don't want to sit with him.
Quiet. I decide who sits with whom.
To your places.
You're a class of hooligans and ball brawlers. Pen.
But from today I won't be giving you an inch.
You have to know all the basic rules, all formulae, all precepts.
You shan't make a single mistake.
So, for example, the theorem of cosine. Posusta.
- The theorem of cosine... - Goes...?
- The theorem of cosine goes... - You don't know. Sit down.
You know how to fight but not to study! Kulik. The second brawler.
The theorem of cosine?
- Yes, the theorem of cosine goes...? - I'll learn it by tomorrow.
Too late. Sit down.
Vanek, the third school representative. I hope you know this.
- I don't know it, sir. - Aha. At least you're direct.
So, we've had the brawlers; next in line is their grateful public.
Peterka.
- What is it? What? - You've got to speak some sentence.
- What? - Well? - Cosine.
Kozina's sentence goes: Lomikar, I call you to the divine court...
- Go on, why not. - Then we will see!
So, we will see.
I'll show you! But at the staff meeting! Getting maths mixed up with history!
Next time I'll test you on everything.
Sit down, and return to your jungle.
Ahh, Mr. Petule, as always with a song on your lips.
Yes, with a song. I've dusted the orangutan.
- And Sir also seems to be in a good mood. - Don't be surprised.
We've a new addition to our collections from our admirer Mr. Posusta.
Ahh, Mr. Posusta always sends wonderful things.
This time it's an excellent example of Attacus Edwardsi.
- Ahh, a cactus, if I'm not mistaken? - Cactus, cactus...
- A butterfly! - A beautiful one. Look at the colors.
Yes, and look at this butterfly here. No colors to be seen on that.
You've worn that for twelve years, ever since I came here.
It's hard thing, Mr. Petule.
You've nine hundred a month and you throw it away on books.
- I have to study, Mr. Petule. - Yes, study.
What's the point of studying and being an expert if you don't do the exams?
It's not enough to know the subject, you must get the title and recognition.
Then you can stop being a supply teacher, earn more money and push on.
- This way you're holding yourself back. - Biology is a large discipline,
Mr. Petule, and the more I know, the more I realize that I know nothing.
You're every inch a scientist. You know every sort
of varmint but you don't go to the examinations.
I'd go there myself with what I know from you.
It's all too little, Mr. Petule.
For you. If I knew what you know I'd overthrow whole university committee.
You'll take Latin, professor. And only Czech in the seventh year.
Does that mean I can start teaching immediately, sir?
- Yes. - Thank you, my respects.
- Where are you off to, young man? - Socrates on his way
to visit Gorgias was also stopped by an eunuch at the gate.
- Ah, professor, we've been expecting you. - What are those strange shrieks?
They make a racket in the seventh year. Their teacher probably isn't there.
A good chance to impose some order and start teaching.
- Straight away? - Yes. What's the class like?
I don't know. The class teacher says they make a habit of anarchy.
- The best student? - Somebody called Mazanek.
- And the worst? - That'll be Mr. Kulik.
And his rival is Mr. Peterka. Both nice intelligent gentlemen, but unlucky.
Thank you.
Quiet! Taming wild horses in the American West.
I'm sorry to interrupt you. Aren't you by chance Mr. Peterka?
- Yes, sir. - And you must be Mr. Kulik.
- Yes, Kulik. - Pleased to meet you.
- Please take your places.
The others as well.
Quiet.
Ladislav the Czech king was a posthumous child.
Mazanek.
After Albrecht's death his son Ladislav was born, known as the Posthumous.
Two governors ruled in Bohemia during the period of his minority.
Jiri of Podebrady, the popular leader of the utraquists
and Jan Hunyady who fought the Turks. - Sit down. You've got a fail from me.
Ladislav the Posthumous. Mr. Kulik.
Ladislav the King of Bohemia, who was a posthumous child,
was born after his parents died.
Sit down, wise guy. You have a fail.
As I thought. The class has gone completely rotten from first to last.
- Well, shall I have one last try? - Watch this. I'll wind him up.
- So, what about you? - Ladislav the Czech king was posthumous
- is, please sir, a complex sentence. - Excellent, congratulations.
A pupil who's understood that this is a Czech, and not a history, lesson.
- What's your name? - Vanek Jan.
You're getting a distinction, Jan Vanek.
- What's that? - Please sir, he composed it himself.
An artist. I'm sorry to confiscate it. Such things don't belong in school.
- I am Vorisek. - Professor Seda.
Pleased to meet you, class teacher.
I'm not the class teacher, just the French teacher.
- Oh, excuse me. - You are welcome.
- Sir was lucky to capture something. - What do you mean?
I see some musical notes here. If I may I'll take them to Professor Rabiska.
- Why? - He collects them.
He's interested in the student's soul. And he studies it from these things.
- That's an interesting idea. - That's what I think, a good idea.
And if by chance you're interested then go to door number 17.
That's the museum. You may visit it when you're free.
Yes, I'll have a look.
And if by chance you find something else of interest,
then bring it either to me or number 17. To Mr. Rabiska.
Sergeant Kulik! Where's your homework?
What an age!
Mathematics. Where's the French?
Monsieur le professeur, on the other side.
Hmm, an efficient system.
- Where's your text book? - Ah, le livre. Oui, oui, oui...
Ici.
Let me present to you a French textbook in pristine condition.
Please be so kind and inspect our new system. Patent "Kulik".
No more carrying books to school.
You don't have to bother with heavy piles. It's enough to take respective
page that's being used. For more information go to sergeant Kulik.
After using please be so kind and keep it in elegant file.
- Make sure it's fixed tomorrow, or else! - Oui, oui. Merci, merci.
This ends the inspection of exercise and text books.
Attention, examination will begin.
With vocabulary will come for example...
Well, Sima, the flying Dutchman.
Please sir, we haven't done the class register yet.
What? The new teacher didn't make the register?
Why didn't you tell me right away? Quick. Pen.
There's no ink. Mazanek, quickly dip this pen.
What a wait.
What's this? This is a hoe, not a pen.
- You rascal. - Please sir, it's not mine. I only...
Get out of my sight.
Bring me a proper pen.
Please sir, I've got a fountain pen.
Give it here.
This doesn't work either.
Please sir, you have to lift this lever on the side.
Where, here? Here. That's a patent. What sort of stupid system is this?
Be careful, sir, that it doesn't spurt out.
I don't have time to play with some lever. Here, take it away.
So can someone give me a proper pen or not?!
Get back to your seats, you rabble!
Now, student Vanek, bring me a proper, well-dipped pen.
- You're personally responsible for it working! - Yes, sir.
So, the bell goes in five minutes. You've done it again, you con-artists.
But tomorrow you'll make up for it.
Now attention. We'll go through the irregular verbs.
The verb "to see", past tense...
Kulik!
I saw.
I saw...
I saw you yesterday playing football the whole afternoon.
Admit it, monster, you didn't do a stroke of work. Sit down!
Boys, learn the irregular verbs for me. It's important.
Without irregular verbs you won't get anywhere, remember that.
I've got you. No French, no studying, but instead a novel!
I'm up here teaching while you're travelling through the Sahara.
Please sir, I wanted to finish this chapter.
"Ha, ha, ha, your lies are in vain, cursed sheik. I know everything.
The Great Sultan will decide your fate. "Yes, Peterka,
the Sultan will decide your fate. After class you'll go to the headmaster.
That's the fifth time I've caught you!
So, we really haven't done much again.
I'm trying to capture a student's development from first to eighth year.
Aha, I understand. You capture the character through changing customs.
Yes.
Here's a small example.
- That's a fizgig. - Exactly, that's fizgig,
which used to belong to the first-year Chudomel.
In the fifth year the same student had rather different hobbies.
- Hm, again "fizgig". - Very apposite, dear colleague.
Or here. Student Smotlacha in the first...
And here in the eighth year.
Evidently his hobby was growing with him. What is he today?
I don't know exactly. I think he's a lawyer.
And the pupil whose composition I took, do you have any other trophies of his?
Vanek? Certainly. Please, my dear colleague.
Here are several of his tunes. He wrote a song already in the second year.
And this is an epic composition. He did it in the fourth year.
"Cantata for the headmaster's bowler".
It looks like a normal student joke, but musically it's quite good.
- Are you a musician? - Just a pianist.
I'd be grateful if you would study it from a musical perspective.
It's an interesting case of a hobby that I can't judge properly as a layman.
I was just about to ask you if you'd allow me to take this latest work home.
- That boy interests me. - With the greatest pleasure.
- I'll appreciate your opinion. - Thank you, I'll return it tomorrow
and tell you if the boy really does have something.
- Thank you. Goodbye. - Goodbye.
- Excuse me. - Excuse me.
This is a coincidence. You don't recognize me.
I don't have that honor.
But I'm Vorisek, your former pupil from the grammar school in Jaromer.
Vorisek, Vorisek... Aha, Petr Vorisek from Jaromer. Yes, I know.
For eight years you messed around...
Not me, you're mistaking me with Kudrna.
No, I'm not wrong. Kudrna was just as big a rascal as you.
In your leaving exam you confused a hamster with a musk rat, am I right?
- You have quite a memory, sir. - What are you doing here, Vorisek?
I've been appointed to the school to teach Latin and Czech.
Appointed. Ahh, so you must be our new colleague.
My congratulations. I'm glad our new colleague is a former student of mine.
So you're teaching Latin are you, Vorisek? Excuse me, Mr. Vorisek?
Come on, I'll introduce you to the staff. They'll be happy to meet you.
Ha, Sheik Peterka.
What are you bringing us?
Sir, I came to ask you if I might be excused
- from reporting to the headmaster... - This time I'll let you off.
But if it happens again... Go.
- Excuse me, sir... - I've already told you that you can go!
Excuse me, sir, I wanted to ask you
if you'd be so kind and give me my book back.
What?
You see, sir, I wanted to finish that chapter.
Get out!
Or if you could just tell me whether Ahmed manages to escape.
I'll give you Ahmed! Sheik! Come here.
You'll get it back if you bring me part two.
- Excuse me? - Part two of the novel.
- The Yellow Devil Twenty Years Later. - Yes, sir, I'll try and find it.
But don't read it under the bench.
You may go.
- So, did he give it back to you? - No, he didn't.
- He's completely engrossed in it. - So stop moaning and come on.
Come? I've got other problems. Do you know what I have to find?
- The second part of Yellow Devil. - The grey wolf ordered you, didn't he?
No, but it'd put me in his good books.
So go round the newsagents, some may have it.
But today I must do my geography homework.
It's all right, Sheik, I'll find it.
- I'd be very grateful. - No problem.
- Gentlemen, let's go home. I'm hungry. - Let's go.
My compliments. You don't have Yellow Devil Twenty Years Later, do you?
If by any chance you might have Yellow Devil...
- Oh, it's you, Miss. My compliments. - Doctor, sir.
What a coincidence. Are you here always?
- I'll have to come here more often. - Packet of ten, please.
My respects.
Are you looking for a book, doctor?
A novel for a friend. Myself I don't read. Just the sport news.
Packet of ten, please.
- Good bye. I'm disturbing you. - No you're not.
Packet of shorts and some matches.
Good bye. Listen, Miss, we could meet up some time.
- If by chance you had some free time. - The day after tomorrow would be good.
Excellent. Say at ten o'clock there at the corner? All right?
- All right. - My compliments, Miss.
- Goodbye, doctor. - My compliments.
It's nice, Honza. I like it.
But I can't remember exactly how it was.
What you mean if I go to Vorisek and ask him to give it back to me?
Try it. I think he'll give it back. You have a good start with him.
You made quite an impression with that complex sentence.
- He's an interesting person, isn't he? - He's great. You could say he's cool.
If he understood music a little, he might be able to help me.
Let's wait and see. Look, I brought you the Latin
and the three maths examples. - Thank you.
Now I must leave for training. Could you play me that motif again?
Oh no, here's my father. It's all over. Bye, Zdenka.
Farewell, Mummy.
- Darling, call him. - No. Let him go.
He's got his mind and I've got mine. It won't do him any harm.
- But what'll he do on his own? - Let him learn to fight.
I also left home and proved that I could make a fist of life.
If he's really got something then let him show it.
But he has to earn a living somehow.
You say he gets musical talent from you. Let him earn his way from music.
It's an honorable profession like any other.
Remarkable depths of a student's soul.
The seventh-year Vanek preferred to leave home rather
than give up his music activities.
Come in.
Hello.
- I'm returning the composition. - What did you think?
I think the boy has real talent. His latest work
- is truly excellent. - Really?
Do you know the boy's had to leave home due to the music?
- Is anyone absent? - No, sir.
What's going on?
Please sir, Latin composition dragged on and we had to go out.
- What do you mean, had to? - Please sir, we were in a hurry.
- To your places. Sit down, sit down. - Seventh squadron, disperse!
Be seated. Quiet, quiet, sit down.
Well, boys, I have a big surprise for you today. Yet...
What is it!
Excuse me, but could you spare Vanek for a second?
Of course. Vanek, my colleague would like to talk to you.
Quiet now. Before we begin our studies I'll show you
something you haven't seen before.
Our school collection has been enriched by a rare example,
a curiosity of which there are very few. I hope that you're all here.
- I don't see Vanek! Where's Vanek? - You just excused him, sir.
Aha, that's right. Well, we'll just have to wait for him.
I've heard that you go to play in a café. Is that right?
Please sir, my father sold the piano. I didn't have anywhere to play.
And I also needed to earn some money.
- What for? - I bought some sheet music, sir.
- Probably some foxtrots? - No, sir.
I bought Suk's Spring and Novak's Slovak Suite.
- Those are difficult pieces. - Do you know them, sir?
A little. I also play the piano. But I don't have enough patience.
Well, you're certainly able to manage Chopin's waltzes.
Not really if to play them properly. What about this, for example?
That's difficult, but this one's even harder.
Yes, that's very good. What about this one,
this is also very nice.
If the headmaster heard us now we'd both be in trouble.
Listen, Vanek, stop playing in the café.
You could get into trouble with the board of governors.
- Moreover you'll spoil your talent this way. - But how will I practice?
Leave that to me. Now get back to class.
Thank you, sir.
So, now that we're all here I'd like your full attention.
You will see an Attacus Edwardsi. The rarest butterfly in India.
You can pass the butterfly round.
Look at it carefully and then we'll talk about it.
Just be careful please, very careful that you don't break it.
Note the diverse color on the wings, which makes it invisible in nature.
We call it mimicry. Peterka...
Peterka, what is mimicry?
- Mimicry is when... - When it gets lost.
Mimicry is when it gets lost. The butterfly.
My dear boy, I like you, but I'm afraid I'll have to mark you down for that.
Show me.
Surface areas good, but it doesn't have a joy-stick.
Let me. I can get the same for fifty crowns at Fric's.
Stop prattling and pass it on, he can't wait to get it.
Note the interesting pattern on the wings.
Yes, sir. Please sir, it also has a proboscis.
- Yes, a downy proboscis. - A downy proboscis.
That's a real student, he spots everything.
The rest of you should follow his example. What else do you see?
- Please sir, it also has legs. - That's right. It has legs.
It also has a retractable undercarriage.
What's that? Silence.
- I need to disappear. - Where are you going?
- I've got a meeting at ten o'clock. - Go on then. Matulka won't mind.
Why should I ask for permission? I'll get out another way.
Kulik, how many times do I have to discipline you?
Nature doesn't interest you, all you do is to make mischief.
You know what, go up to the blackboard so I can see you.
What is it, Kulik?
I..., I can't control it, I have bad nerves.
Is this some sort of a joke?
No, sir. I can't stand it when people shout at me.
I immediately have a nervous fit.
Pull yourself together, Kulik. I won't hurt you.
- What's wrong with you exactly? - I... I'm ill.
I... I have to go to the doctor. Bad nerves.
Quiet. You should stay at home, boy, if you're not well.
But sir, I like school so much.
Don't laugh, the boy has a good heart.
- What is it? - Another fit, sir.
So take your books and go home.
- Please sir, I don't have any books. - What do you mean,
you don't have any books? - No, sir.
Don't worry about that now, let's go. When you're well you can come back.
Quiet! We'll prepare a real welcome for Matulka.
You're a little overworked, you need to relax.
But I have five Es, sir.
That'll get better. Go on.
- Sir... - What is it?
Don't be angry with me.
I'm not angry, but you know sometimes a person has to be strict.
I really like you, sir.
And I like you too. Go on, go, go.
Who's responsible for this? Rascals. Villains!
You should be ashamed of yourselves.
You laugh at another pupil who's sick and try to destroy my nerves.
My patience is exhausted! Is this what I get for being good to you?
Shame on you! I tell you my patience is exhausted!
Where are you going, Mr. Kulik? For a walk?
- I have a meeting, Mr. Petule. - Meeting, and school comes second?
I don't really want to go there. One thing worries me.
I deceived our old Matulka. And now I feel awful about it. He's a great guy.
You shouldn't have done that. He'll lose his nerves and never do that exam.
What? He has to do an exam?
- Don't you know it? - No.
You notice any teacher's weak point or a mistake.
But you don't see a poor soul with nine hundred a month. Wiseacres.
- Why doesn't he do the exam? - Because of an exam fever.
- Such a scientist and still a supply teacher. - Can't we help him somehow?
I have got an idea, but I can't do it on my own.
- We'll help you, Mr. Petule. - Really? So, listen.
Fail! Fail!
All of you fail!
Give me a butterfly.
Boys, why do you do this to me? It doesn't have to be this way.
I am after all just a human being as well.
Well guys, we've really screwed up this time.
Guys, listen to this. Matulka's fallen down in the corridor.
What are you sitting down for, you idiots. Hurry!
Be careful.
What's happened? What's wrong?
What happened? What is it, dear colleague?
I'm sorry, headmaster. A sudden indisposition.
Did you lose your temper in the seventh?
No, headmaster. I haven't felt myself all morning.
You need calm and relaxation, my dear colleague.
The best thing is to go home and relax there.
I can't, headmaster. What would my colleagues say to replace me?
I'll take the fourth for you. It will be my pleasure.
- And I'll take the sixth, geography. - You see. You can go home after all.
- But who'll look after the collections? - I'll take care of everything.
Just go and relax. We'll keep you informed on everything.
The collections are in the very best condition.
Mr. Kahuda is taking every care with it. Yes, so I don't forget, that salamander
you have in the aquarium, with the dots, has had some babies.
- Really? - A bunch of little monsters.
And the budgerigars have been fighting again. They're constantly squabbling.
Yes, yes. Budgerigars tend to squabble.
I must find some way to thank to colleague Kahuda.
And another thing. That bat you keep in the box slept all the time.
Suddenly wakes up, fidgets a little and then went to sleep again.
- Went to sleep again? - Went to sleep again.
And what about my classes? Is anyone teaching them?
No problems of any sort. The matter's in hand.
The younger teachers are taking your classes.
It's clear no-one is able to teach the same great way as you do.
The young woman teacher's a little at sea with the minerals,
but otherwise everything's going very well.
- And seventh class? Are they studying? - They're quite different
since that incident on the corridor.
- They take things far more seriously. - And Kulik, is he better now?
Like a fish. And if Sir knew how they think of him.
- Has something happened, doctor? - Why do you ask, Miss?
- You seem rather sad today. - I'm worried about a colleague of mine.
- What's wrong with him? - He can't do his exams.
He's very talented, but he's frightened of taking the examination.
- Is he doing his doctorate? - No, his state examination.
He's a professor. Not yet a professor. A colleague called Matulka.
Miss, excuse me, but I have to do something for him today.
- I have to talk to an influential person. - Are you leaving already?
I'm afraid so. It's urgent. So don't be upset. Goodbye.
- Goodbye. - So, goodbye.
It's good, friend Vanek. But difficult for the fingers on occasion.
I wanted to elaborate the theme.
Good. But you should remember that every musical idea
must be technically realizable. Otherwise it has no value.
I wouldn't agree, sir.
What if you wrote a magnificent choral piece
but nobody in the world could sing it?
It wouldn't be worth a damn, would it?
- Who could that be? - That'll be boys from our class.
- Seventh-years? What do they want? - Don't be upset, sir.
The boys have a little favor to ask you. I was meant to prepare you for it.
Aha, a deputation.
Come in.
- Our best compliments. - Best compliments.
- A great honor. - Close the door.
- Come in, envoys. - Hello, boys.
- Please sit down, gentlemen. - Thank you.
Sit down, Vanek, so the meeting of conspirators is complete.
- Thank you. - Sit down.
So, what's up, my dear guests? Would you like some black coffee?
- Please don't trouble yourself. - Please don't trouble yourself, sir.
It's nothing. For such an important visit.
Black coffee.
Would you like a cigarette?
- No, thank you, I'm in training. - Thank you.
Well, boys. What's all this about?
We wanted... We would like...
- We wanted to ask you... - We wanted to ask.
- If you'd be good enough... - Good enough.
We wanted to ask you, sir, if you wouldn't do something
for Mr. Matulka.
- He's frightened about taking the exams. - Don't be stupid.
You've surprised me, boys.
It's a pleasant surprise. It's thoughtful of you.
We really like him, and we'd like to help him.
To help.
I'll tell you something, boys.
I know Doctor Vondrak quite well, who's due to examine Mr. Matulka.
I'd be very happy to go and see him. But, please, tell me one thing.
How are we going to get Mr. Matulka to actually take the exams.
Mr. Petule has an idea.
- Who did you say? - Our caretaker, Mr. Petule.
I see this conspiracy has many branches to it.
Copy the examples down from the board, and no excuses about copying them
down wrong. You know what could happen to you. Four repeats.
- Zdenka, send me a crib. - Chalupova, write it down.
Zdena, don't forget that I love you.
Work on it separately and don't copy from each other.
If I catch anyone copying I'll take away their test and won't listen to excuses.
You know that not a mouse could get past me.
- Here it is. - Quickly, rip it out.
Hold on, he's getting up. Hide it.
Today's test is especially important.
I want to know exactly how well you know the seventh year course.
And no whispering or turning round.
- Zdena, have you got it yet? - Just a moment.
Get on with it, I've got a brilliant idea.
What's the matter, Peterka?
- Present, sir. - What present? Go on. Here.
Why don't you write in your exercise book?
Please sir, first I make rough counting.
You're just holding yourself up.
- Tonda. - Many thanks, beautiful senorita.
Peterka!
You haven't even started yet. Get to work and don't disturb the others.
I see that some of you haven't even started to count yet.
Strange, even a pupil like Mazanek has problems with the first example.
Time is running out. Get a move on.
Ah look, now he's off! Go for it, Mazanek. That's the way.
Peterka! What's going on?
Please sir, I've got back-ache and I wanted to stretch a little.
I'll give you stretch! Once more and I'll throw you out the door.
- Look, he's got a crib on his coat-tail. - Wait, I'll bring him over here.
- Please sir. - What is it, Sima?
Please, may I use the space down here for writing?
What space? What you mean?
It must be usually kept empty, but I need more space for counting, so if I may?
Of course, how could a seventh-year ask about such a stupid thing?
Come on boys, pass it here. Don't be cheapskate.
Kulik, stop making mischief. You're not on the football field.
Work instead.
Please sir, would you be kind enough and move a little?
- There's a shadow falling on my desk. - All right, all right.
- Please sir, could you go forward, not back. - Why forward?
- I've got a shadow slanting across... - Shall I make light for you as well?
No, sir...
We juniors have got a new captain.
- One called Kulik. What a player! - Kulik from the seventh?
Zdimera! Be quiet.
And now I'll show you how hydrogen originates.
The utmost caution is required for when mixed with air it makes quite a bang.
He can shoot from every position. Come to training today and watch.
Zdimera! You again?
As soon as I finish the explosion I'll put your name in the class book.
Now I want your attention. The best part of the experiment is coming up.
Water bubbles in the beaker, the dangerous gas escapes,
but we'll be careful and collect it in the test-tube.
Please sir, can I hand it in?
- Are you ready, Petanek? - Yes, sir.
Give it here.
- Hm. Is anyone else ready? - Please sir, I am. Here.
Shh, quiet.
Read it through once again. It's quite a difficult test.
Tonda, he's still got it on his coat. What are we going to do?
Don't worry, I'll get it off him.
- Where are you off to? - Please sir, to wipe the board.
That's not necessary. Get back to your seat.
He'll go to the teachers' room and there'll be a scandal.
Game is over, senorita. But don't worry, nobody will say anything.
Maybe something will happen. A bomb will explode and there'll be panic...
Silence! Stop! You're not going anywhere.
I'll see myself what has happened.
- Mazanek! What are you doing? - Please sir...
- I'll ask you again, what are you doing? - Please sir, I'm running away.
Running away. You don't know how to run away? This is how you run away.
Stop, Mazanek!
Why are we running on our own, Mazanek? You have to run away in a crowd.
- Please sir... - You've deceived me, Mazanek.
You won't improve your P.E. mark like this. No, no. Lower your arms.
No, no, no. Lower your arms.
Zdimera! You'll pay for this.
Pupil Zdimera disrupted the class when producing an explosive.
In doing so he distracted the teacher's attention,
and as a result the experiment...
...ended in detonation.
So! Zdimera!
A unique and previously unrecorded case.
The whole class performed excellently.
This happened the fifteenth May, thirty-nine, in the seventh class.
Pupils were dictated a very difficult mathematical exercise.
Every answer was without a mistake and therefore excellent.
Quite remarkable. Quite remarkable.
State examination for Prof. Matulka, fee paid.
My dear colleague, I'll make necessary formalities with the exam committee
and tomorrow morning I'll expect you with our colleague Matulka.
Many thanks, professor. I'll see you tomorrow at nine.
It's very good of you to look after your old teacher like this,
but I doubt you'll get him to come. Your good old Matulka
is legendary within the faculty for his fear of exams.
- I know, professor. - Professor Kolacek, bless his soul,
tried in vain to get him to every exam.
And my predecessor Doctor Jarnik told him every year that he should
take the examination. But all in vain.
But this time it'll definitely work.
Our seventh-years have thought of a way to get him here.
- The seventh-years? - Yes. They really like him.
I'm really here as their ambassador. If you'd help us a little, professor.
Nothing could give me more pleasure. But how are you going to lure him here?
With the greatest love of his life. This.
Good morning, young friends. I can officially inform you
that at nine o'clock this morning prof. Matulka will take his state exam.
Sit down, the bell's gone.
Excuse me, I thought I was taking French here.
That's quite right. I just wanted to tell the class something.
My respect.
Today we'll get right on with it. Last time we didn't get anything done.
What's up with you?
I'll teach you not to fidget.
Stand up! Sit down!
Well. Sit down, Kulik.
And now quiet.
Open your exercise books.
What are you looking at, lotus flower?
Write.
The past perfect subjunctive...
Why aren't you writing? What is that supposed to mean?
So, what is that supposed to mean?
Let us continue.
The past perfect subjunctive of the verb "to receive".
I can't take this any more. I'm going to see Matulka.
- Excuse me. Doctor Vorisek? - Yes.
My name is Vanek. You wanted to see me.
I'm pleased to see you, Mr. Vanek.
I'd like to talk to you about your son. He's a very talented boy.
Yes, he is talented, you're right. He takes after me.
Exactly. Please.
I wanted to ask you on his behalf, not to be so strict on him.
I'm not strict, professor. I just wanted him to study.
- Please, sit down. - Thank you.
I only want the best for him, professor.
I had his piano taken away because I wanted to force him to study.
So you see, Mr. Vanek. You're forcing him to do something he doesn't want to,
- and you're taking away what he loves. - All right, but I think that first
he has to finish his studies, and then he can devote himself to his hobbies.
That's a major mistake most parents make.
They think their child must study whether he has a gift for it or not.
Meanwhile they kill off the young person's hobbies and skills.
In three years your son could be at the Conservatory and be happy there.
Now he has to torture himself with maths, he's depressed,
and hates school, which is standing in the way of his career.
And do you think, professor, that he could be something in music?
- He certainly has talent. - If you say so, professor,
then I'll have his piano returned.
Copy everything down carefully. I'll wait.
Boys! We're going to see Matulka!
Whoever doesn't go is a stinking coyote! Confirm participation with a signature.
Sign it, coyote.
Sign it.
What's all this gabbling about!
What's got into you today? What's got into you?
Peterka! You're not reading today!
Why aren't you reading, Peterka? Where's the third part of the Yellow Devil?
Please sir, I don't have it. I don't feel myself today.
You disappoint me, Sheik Peterka.
Well, we haven't done much today.
Sausage, please, sausage for me...
Seventh year.
Vanek, Sheik.
Lotus flower.
What are you doing?
Whistling! Are you a coachman or a student?
A student, sir.
You seventh-years really bring me joy!
Go!
Hurry, hurry! There's a bus waiting downstairs.
Quick, quick.
Mr. Kulik, where are you off to? A trip to the brewery?
We're doing a bunk, Mr. Petule. Matulka's doing the exam today,
so we're all going there. - Dear God, I must be there
regardless I could lose my job.
- I'll ring the bell to be right with you. - Excellent, we'll wait outside.
To your classes. Quickly, quickly.
Well, I know that joke.
Give me the pen.
Every joke, when it's repeated, ceases to be a joke.
It's stupid and childish.
Mazanek, give me the pen.
Mazanek!
You're a good boy! Don't be silly and give me the pen.
So, my friends, I'm running out of patience.
When you did it the first time I took it as a joke.
But this time there could be severe consequences.
I've had enough! Rascals!
All of you, come out! Kulik! Mazanek! What!
Where are you? Where are you?
Help! Help! Headmaster! The seventh has gone missing!
Help! Headmaster, help! The seventh has gone missing.
Hoorah for Matulka! We're going to see Matulka. Hoorah for Matulka.
Hello, Dad! Could you let us through? We're going to see Matulka.
We read your offer to sell-out your collection,
and we'd like to buy something for our grammar school.
Please have a look through everything, gentlemen.
- Maybe you'll find something you need. - Certainly, certainly.
Our institution has a patron who donated a certain sum.
And our colleague here, an expert, would like to choose some things we need.
Of course, go ahead. Everything's at your disposal.
Unfortunately the different items aren't marked with their titles.
- That's quite all right. May I? - Please go ahead.
Vorisek, come.
Write down:
Polychrisia,
Catocala electa. Have you got that?
Yes, electa.
My goodness. Parnasius. Vorisek, come here, come here.
A beautiful, beautiful example of Parnasius phoebus.
- We studied it. What do they differ from? - They differ from... damn, I've lost it.
You don't know. You? No. Aha. From Parnasius fasciata.
That's what happens if you don't learn at school.
Lycaenidae. Ah.
Scolitantides orion. That's very rare here.
And here Boloria euphrosyne. Brenthis ino...
- I believe that lives on nettles? - On spiraea, my friend, only.
- We had that in the fifth, remember? - Yes, yes, I remember.
I'd like you to have something else for free, professor.
- I've got a few butterflies here. - A few butterflies?
But these are Satyridae. A perfect collection and he says few butterflies.
We've also got some beetles, professor.
We need something from the Elateridae family.
- Elateridae are over there. - Come Vorisek, we'll look at the Elateridae.
Those to be Elateridae? Oh no, sir. Those are Cardiophorus.
I see Elateridae over there. You don't even know what's in your collection.
Look. Elater sanguineus, cinnabarinus, sanguinolentus, haemorhoidalis...
See how the wise nature has endowed them with protective coloring.
And here Selatosomus and Limonius.
Shall we go on?
What's this here? Vorisek, here.
My dear. This is a real beauty.
It's the jewel of your collection.
One of the rarest examples of African water scavenger-beetles.
It's incredible, professor, what an expert you are.
You could lecture at the university.
Oh no, I couldn't. What I know isn't enough even for...
And what if it's sufficient?
Dear sir, I should know whether it's enough or not.
Would you believe I don't even have the state examination yet?
Yes you do. You've just passed it. Congratulations.
Who is this? Who do I have the honor...
This is university professor Doctor Vondrak.
You must excuse us for having deceived you.
We wanted to entice you into the exam, and so we thought up a little trick.
This can't be. I haven't studied everything yet.
Mr. Matulka, you've passed the exam cum laude.
Vorisek, what does this mean?
Eight years you made mischief, and now this. Vorisek, Vorisek...
My dear colleague, Mr. Matulka, don't be angry with us.
Once more, my congratulations. I'll prepare the diploma in the faculty.
Oh, yes... Doctor... Professor... Yes... Vorisek.
Thank you.
Forgive me, if I... Excuse me. Vorisek, come with me.
Take your hat. Doctor, excuse me. Thank you.
What's this, Vorisek? What's this?
It's half-past nine. The professor is in the firing line.
I'm as nervous as if I was doing the exam myself.
You know what, Mr. Kulik, my legs are shaking like jelly.
I think that Matulka will dazzle the examination committee.
- Definitely. He'll pass it. - Look, they're coming.
See, professor, today you're as famous as Planicka.
Thank you, Mr. Petule, and thank you all.
Here we end our treatise:
We present a beautiful example of students' love for their teacher.
And we include a picture of the great welcome
that the class prepared for deeply moved professor.
Come in.
- Good day. - Come in, dear colleague.
I'm just finishing my treatise on the student's soul.
You're finishing.
I wanted to ask you for something.
Of course.
You've written a book on the fact that a student has a soul.
I'd like to ask you very kindly,
here you've got a little space,
if you'd also add
that a student also has a heart.
Certainly.
A student also has a heart.
Idea and a novel by Sceenplay by
Music by Director of Photography
Set Design Sound
Edited by Production
Directed by Worldwide Distribution
Recorded by Produced at
Featuring Teaching Staff
Seventh-year Students
Parents
THE END