“我们的英语能力常年徘徊在初中二年级水平”字幕组 简称“中二”字幕组
Starring LesIie NieIsen. 主演：莱斯利·尼尔森
AIso starring AIan North. 还是--艾伦·诺斯
And Rex HamiIton as Abraham LincoIn. 雷克斯·汉密尔顿 饰 林肯
Tonight's speciaI guest star, Georg Stanford Brown. 今晚客串明星：乔治·斯坦福·布朗
注：保险柜上写着“联合安全”。
Tonight's episode, A Dangerous Assignment. 第二集：危险任务
（注：旁白男是临时工么…… 他说的和标题压根对不上嘛=_=!）
散开。继续。 Break it up. Come on.
来吧，小伙 Okay, kid.
看到高处的马丁发出的信号，你就放水 When we get the high sign from Martin, then you take the dive.
注：英文中的“放水”（作弊）take the dive 跟“潜水”表达类似。【中文无奈梗……】
四，五 Four, five,
六，七 six, seven,
八，九 eight, nine,
十！你输了！ ten, you're out!
迈克 Mike,
我觉得你犯了个大错 l think you made a big mistake.
库珀，你担忧过度了 Cooper, you worry too much.
不好意思，不准入内 l'm sorry, no one's allowed inside.
不，不好意思，这是规矩，这是规矩 No, l'm sorry. lt's the rules, it's the rules.
-请勿入内 -No entry. -记者 -Press.
Okay.
我是警司Frank Drebin My name is Sergeant Frank Drebin,
警队侦查科 Detective Lieutenant, PoIice Squad,
警队的一个特殊部门 a speciaI division of the poIice force.
我刚从牲畜围场出来 I'd just come from the stockyards.
我们接到报警 We'd gotten reports that hundreds of cows
上百头牛不声不响地被人屠杀 had been senseIessIy slaughtered in the area.
可我没找到证据 But I couIdn't find any evidence.
我停车买了个汉堡，联系了指挥部 I stopped off for a hamburger and checked in with headquarters.
得知有一宗表面上看起来很明显是自杀的案子 There'd been an apparent suicide.
于是我立即赶往现场，我的头儿已经在那里了。 I went right to the scene. My boss was aIready there.
-Ed，发生了什么？ -Ed. What's up? -嗨，Frank -Hi, Frank.
警卫一小时前发现了尸体 Guard discovered the body about an hour ago.
有人在案发前进来了 Somebody went in here right before it happened,
可警卫眼神不济，而且他还没查身份 but the guard's got bad eyes and he can't make an l.D.
咱这会儿正在清理现场寻找指纹 We're dusting for prints now.
-发生了什么？ -What happened? -一个叫迈克·舒尔茨的小伙 -Kid named Mike Schultz.
现场被布置成自杀，可我不这么认为 Set up to look like suicide but l'm not so sure.
一个刚刚取得职业生涯 Why would a boxer
最大胜利的拳击手 who just scored the biggest victory of his career
怎么会自杀呢？ go out and commit suicide?
-你认为是谋杀？ -Are you thinking murder? -很有可能 -lt could be.
Anyone with Schultz after the fight? 赛后有人和他在一起吗？
只有他的经纪人，某Cooper Just his manager. Some joe named Cooper.
-这个某Cooper是干嘛的？ -Who's this Joe Cooper? -不，他不姓某，是Sol Cooper -No, no, it's Sol Cooper.
城里近半数的拳击手都归他旗下，听他的号令 He manages half the boxers in town and they're all on the take.
-希望我审审他吗？ -Want me to question him? -别，Frank，先不用 -No, no, Frank. No.
咱有可能需要处理的不仅有谋杀，还有腐败 We may be dealing with murder and corruption here.
我希望你能悄悄地调查 l want you to go undercover.
我了解到蒙塔古·马丁是一个能从 I knew that Montague Martin was one of the few criminaIs
拳击比赛中获利的家伙 who stiII tampered with the outcome of fights.
我计划找个不怎么正直的拳手，想法让他正直咯 My pIan was to find a crooked fighter and straighten him out.
马兰开花二十一， Mabel, Mabel, set the table.
28256，28257，…… Don't forget the red hot...
这不是巴德·布里吉斯吗？ Aren't you Buddy Briggs?
Yeah.
-最近三场都输了，真可惜啊 -Too bad you lost your last three fights. -那是我运气不好。怎样！ -So l had some bad luck. So what?
嗯，可能你没有得到正确的指导和调教（可能你的经纪人不太行吧） Well, maybe you don't have the right kind of management.
巴德，你不觉得你该重新考虑一下了吗？ Don't you think you should start thinking about that, Buddy?
-我过得相当舒坦。 -l make a pretty good living. -也许你能过得更舒坦。 -Maybe you can make a better one,
更清净，更好 and a cleaner one and a better one.
-你经纪人在哪里？ -Where's your manager? -在后面 -ln the back.
你们当中一定有一位是巴德·布里吉斯的经纪人吧？ One of you manage Buddy Briggs?
-咋了？ -Yeah. -那你是库珀咯 -You gotta be Cooper.
我听说城里几乎每个拳手都是你的 l hear you own a piece of just about every boxer in town.
-是啊，跟你有什么关系？ -Yeah, what's it to you? -我也是个经纪人 -l'm a manager.
我想接手巴德·布里吉斯的合约 l wanna take over Buddy Briggs' contract.
-你谁啊？哪来的聪明人？ -What are you, some kind of wise guy? -啊哈，我是个聪明人 -Yeah, l'm a wise guy
手里还有大把钞票呢 with a lot of long green.
你手里有达巴·超飘？ You manage Lorne Greene?
-我用巴德给你交易达巴·超飘 -l'll trade Buddy for Lorne Greene. -不，我意思是我有现钞 -No, no. l mean l got cash.
-你连贤超都有？ -You manage Johnny Cash, too? -等等，你是谁？ -Wait a minute. Who are you?
凯利 Kelly.
鲍勃·凯利 Bob Kelly.
-介意我玩两把吗？ -Mind if l sit in a few hands? -你的赌本在这里吃得开 -Your money's good here.
吃啥？ Goodyear?
你连小飞船都有？ You got the blimp, too?
没花多少时间，我就发现这场游戏的局面 It didn't take Iong for me to see
就跟库珀脸上的笑容一样荡漾 that the game was as crooked as Cooper's smiIe.
就剩你和我了，凯利 Just you and me, Kelly.
-我加注500 -l raise you $500. -噢，正合我意 -Well, that's my kind of action.
这是500 Here's your $500.
再大你1000 One grand more.
凯利，这可是笔巨款啊，我没钱了 That's a lot of do-re-mi, Kelly. l'm out of cash.
-这个怎样？ -What about these? -不要骰子 -No dice.
我可是有其他感兴趣的东西 But there is something else l'm interested in.
-是什么？ -What's that? -巴德·布里吉斯的合约 -Buddy Briggs' contract.
好的，凯利 All right, Kelly.
开牌吧 What do you got?
-满堂红（三张同一点数的牌，加一对其他点数的牌） -Full house. Kings over. -别着急，凯利 -Not so fast, Kelly.
-顺子（五张顺连的牌）比满堂红大 A straight beats a full house.
不，可不是，顺子赢三张（三张同一点数的牌） No it doesn't. A straight beats three of a kind.
满堂红比顺子大 A full house beats a straight.
-同花比顺子大吗？ -Doesn't a flush beat a straight? -同花顺最大 -A straight flush beats everything.
-毕竟不是同花大顺 -Not a royal flush. -同花比满堂红大吗？ -Does a flush beat a full house?
-普通同花还是同花顺？ -A regular flush or a straight flush? -同花比顺子大 -A flush beats a straight.
我玩得牌多了去了，满堂红比顺子大 l've played a lot of poker. A full house beats a straight.
也许是这样啊，凯利 Maybe so, Kelly.
可我们四个人，你才一个人 But four of us beats one of you.
很好，可我手里还有张王牌 All right, l've got an ace in the hole.
我手里的家伙说了算。巴德·布里奇斯归我了。 That makes me the winner. Buddy Briggs belongs to me now.
可我想把事情做的漂亮又合法，签了这张我带来的卖身契 But just to make it nice and legal, l brought along a bill of sale. Sign it.
你，你来当个见证。 You. You witness it.
你，你检查一下有没有用错字 You, check for spelling errors.
好的，来，库珀，把桌上的物品都收起来 All right, Cooper. Get that stuff in there.
法律（legally）里有几个“L”啊？ How many ''l's'' in legally?
凯利，你这次得到了一个拳手，可之后咱有得打。 You may have a fighter, Kelly, but you'll never get a fight.
城里的情况我会看得比荡妇的裙子还要紧【说反了吧？ We got this town sewn up tighter than a floozy's skirt.
库珀，咱走着瞧 We'll see about that, Cooper.
先生们，真是一个愉快的下午啊 Well, gentlemen, it's been a nice afternoon.
有时间再来玩两局 Hope we can do it again some other time.
我周三晚上有空 l'm free Wednesdays.
这家伙带来的麻烦可比他带来的财富多，我得干掉他 This guy's more trouble than he's worth. l want him knocked off!
计划通！我是巴德·布里吉斯的经纪人了 My pIan was working. I was now Buddy Briggs' manager.
可我还是没办法把库珀和马丁与谋杀案联系起来 But I stiII had no way to connect Cooper and Martin with the murder.
我接到奥尔森的电话，实验室有新发现 I got a caII from OIson. The Iab had come up with something.
凯蒂你看着哈，当我拉下开关 So you see, Katie, when l throw this switch,
电流从电源 the electrical current from the power source
沿着电线到了它的终点 is able to continue its journey to its final destination.
这情况下，灯就亮了 ln our case, the light bulb.
-准备好了吗？ -All set then? -我想是的，奥尔森先生 -l guess so, Mr Olson.
开始咯 Here we go.
嗨弗兰克。 Hi, Frank. Ed. 嘿！ Yeah.
凯蒂，这会儿是不是该出去玩玩了？ Why don't you run along now, Katie?
下周记得从你妈妈的化妆台 And next week remember to bring three things
带三样东西来 from your mother's dresser.
谢啦，奥尔森先生，再见 Thanks, Mr Olson. Bye.
迈克·舒尔茨的案子有什么发现？ Anything on the Mike Schultz case?
那个死掉的拳击手？ The dead boxer?
-嗯，没怎么有线索 -Well, there weren't many clues. -指纹呢？ -Any prints?
没找到，可我找到一点胡须 No, but we found some whiskers.
自己看看吧 Take a look in here.
面部的毛发 Facial hair.
-是啊 -Yep. -毛发跟指纹一样 -Hair is like fingerprints.
没有完全相同的毛囊 No two follicles are alike.
左边的样本是迈克·舒尔茨的 The strand on the left belongs to Schultz.
右边的样本是从他尸体附近发现的 The one on the right was found near his body.
毛发的主人就是我们要找的凶手了 So, whoever belongs to that whisker is our killer.
-你锁定这人了吗？ -Have you identified him? -当然 -Yes.
它属于这位 lt belongs to him.
卢卡·巴奈特是替蒙塔格·马丁做事的拳击手， 连败五场 Luca Burnett was a five-time Ioser who was working for Montague Martin.
这下我知道谁要对这次谋杀负责了 Now I knew who was responsibIe for the murder.
可我需要一个不害怕谈判的家伙 But I needed someone who wasn't afraid to taIk.
下一站就是去做巴德·布里奇斯的工作了 The next step was to work on Buddy Briggs.
-巴德你好 -Hi, Buddy. -你在这里干嘛？ -What are you doing here?
-我是你的信任经纪人 -l'm your new manager. -听着，混蛋 -Look, buster,
我不管你是谁，或者你想挖掘点什么 l don't know who you are or what you're trying to pull,
-可我为库珀卖命 -but l work for Cooper. -不再是了 -Not anymore.
你再也不用故意输掉拳击比赛了 And you don't go in the tank anymore either.
-我不知道你在说些什么 -l don't know what you're talking about. -好吧，巴德，别装傻了 -All right, Buddy, play it stupid.
我可不在乎，你听见我说的没？ l don't care. You hear me?
我可不想在一间密室里丢了性命 l don't wanna end up dead in some locker room.
你出去！ Now get out!
玛丽 Mary.
玛丽，你怎么没去服务员培训学校？ Mary, why aren't you at waitress school?
玛丽 Mary.
你又喝酒了，是吧？ You've been drinking again, haven't you?
-你是个废物 -You're a bum! -玛丽 -Mary.
你就只能从打拳里挣挣钱 The only money you've ever earned is by throwing fights.
我不想嫁给这样的你 You're not the man l married.
-你怎么能这么说呢 -How can you say that? -因为这才是我要嫁的人 -Because here's the man l married.
玛丽，我爱你 Mary, l love you.
我尽力要给你之前没能拥有的一切 l'm trying to give you all the things you never had.
得体的家庭和生活，属于你的犹太教堂 A decent home, a decent life, your own synagogue.
你永远给我不了我这些 You're never gonna give me those things,
你知道为什么吗？因为你太傻 and you know why? 'Cause you got no guts.
你怕马丁和库珀，他们拿下了你 You're scared of Martin and Cooper. They own you.
-没人能吃定我巴德·布里奇斯！没人！ -Nobody owns Buddy Briggs! Nobody! -别骗我了 -Don't lie to me!
每次重要比赛，你都放水。 Every big fight you've ever been in, you've taken a dive.
你知道吗？你本来能有所成就 And you know what? You could've been somebody.
你本可以跟别人一较高下 You could've been a contender instead of a bum,
而不是成为一个现在这样的废物 which is what you are.
Muffin.
巴德，我是来帮你的 Buddy, l'm here to help you.
现在，你觉得你能打倒查普吗？ Now, do you think you can beat the Champ?
-蒙着眼都能（我能蒙上他的眼） -l can take him blindfolded. -假如他没有蒙眼呢 -What if he's not blindfolded?
一样打到他 l can still beat him.
我相信你，这就是我要赌博赢来你的原因 l believe you. That's why l won you in the poker game.
你打得越来越好 You fight on the up-and-up,
自己照照镜子，赢家就长你这样 you'll be able to look in the mirror and see a winner.
伙计，你之前烂泥了太久 You've been living in the dumps too long, pal.
我会帮助你和玛丽离开这下水道般的生活。来吧。 l'm gonna help you and Mary get out of this sewer. Come on.
好的，巴德。 All right, Buddy,
明天Prospect，玛丽工作的酒吧见 now, you meet me tomorrow at Maury's Bar on Prospect.
我会给你安排与查普的一场拳赛 l'm gonna get you a fight with the Champ.
-你为什么要为我做这些。 -How are you gonna do that? -留着点劲给我好好干 -You leave that to me.
巴德 Buddy.
-想要点什么？ -What'll it be? -螺丝刀（伏特加橙汁鸡尾酒） -Screwdriver.
-喝点什么吗？ -Anything to drink? -不用了，谢谢。 -No, thank you.
Hey, Kelly.
今晚这里有很多摄影师啊 Sure are a lot of photographers here tonight.
嗯，我知道，库珀和马丁来了吗？ Yeah, l know. ls Cooper and Martin here?
来了，他们一群流浪汉坐在桌边呢 Yeah. They're sitting at the table with a couple of tramps.
是时候去会会大人物先生了 l think it's time to go and meet Mr Big.
他叫马丁先生 His name's Mr Martin.
额... Well...
嗨，库珀，你最近很是虚张声势啊 Hey, Cooper, you calling any bluffs lately?
这家伙就是凯利先生 lf it isn't Mr Kelly.
我之前给你说过的 lt's the guy l was telling you about,
旗下有大把银子和贤超的家伙 the guy who manages Lorne Greene and Johnny Cash.
你们几个滚远点 Go powder your noses.
听着，聪明人，城里归我罩着 Listen, smart boy, l own this town.
你是有个拳手，可你别想跟我掰手腕。 You may have a fighter, but you're never gonna get a fight.
咱走着瞧 We'll see about that.
玫瑰是红色的，紫罗兰是蓝色的 Roses are red, violets are blue,
糖是甜的，我要打烂你的脸 （英文情诗，最后一句应当为and so are you） sugar is sweet, l'm gonna break your face.
巴德·布里奇斯能打断你身上每根骨头 Buddy Briggs could break every bone in your body.
哦，这样啊，那他一定是个不错的拳手 Yeah, well, he must be a pretty good boxer.
你怎么知道的？ How would you know?
你这辈子从来没有干净地打赢过一场比赛 You never won an honest fight in your life.
放轻松，你一定不想有人受伤，冷静点 Take it easy. Nobody wants to get hurt. Just cool off.
为什么要我冷静？你之所以能成为冠军 Why should l? The only reason you're champ
都是拜那个倒下的或者死去的人所赐 is 'cause of guys lying down or dying.
我给你买点喝的，咱谈谈 Let me buy you a drink. We'll talk.
我不会跟你喝酒的。你太微不足道，你个虚伪的拳手 l wouldn't drink with you, you two-bit, phoney excuse for a fighter.
你只是太累了 You're just tired,
-这不是你本意 -you didn't mean it. -算了 -Forget it.
算了？没人能冲我说“算了”？！ ''Forget it''? Nobody says ''forget it'' to me!
哎嗨嗨，巴德，比赛前可别吹萨克斯 Sorry, buddy, no sax before a fight.
-你是紧张吗？ -Are you nervous? -嗯，有点 -Yeah, a bit.
可我觉得我能搞定他，今晚我不可阻挡 But l know l can take this guy. Nothing can stop me tonight.
-马丁，你来干什么？ -What are you doing here, Martin? -从这滚出去，我现在从良了 -Get out of here. l've gone straight.
你足够聪明的话，在第十二个回合你就得倒地认输 lf you're smart, you'll go straight to the canvas in the 12th.
算了吧 Forget it.
-玛丽在我们手里 -We've got Mary. -什么！ -What?
-你在骗人 -You're bluffing. -哦?是吗？ -Oh, yeah?
-玛丽的围巾！ -Mary's scarf! -这种围巾到处都有 -You could have gotten that anywhere.
-这个怎么样？ -How about this? -玛丽的钱包 -Mary's purse!
-像这样的钱包成千上万 -There are millions of purses like that. -那这个怎么样？ -How about this?
玛丽的面包机 Mary's toaster!
天哪 Oh, my God.
第十二个回合哦，巴德 ln the 12th, Buddy.
太令人难以接受了，我训练就为了赢这场比赛 l can't believe it. l trained to win this fight.
我能赢！可现在我得认输 l can win this fight. Now l gotta lose.
巴德，我跟你做个交易 Buddy, l'll make a deal with you.
我把玛丽带回来，你必须打赢查普 l'll bring back Mary, you beat the Champ.
通过无线电台我安排Hocken多带点人到场子找我 I radioed Hocken to get some men and meet me at the Arena.
假如我想把马丁和他的手下们关起来 If I wanted to put Martin and his monkeys behind bars,
我得尽快找到玛丽 I had to find Mary, and fast.
Johnny，我需要点消息，越快越好 Johnny, l need some information and fast.
有个女的有麻烦了 There's a woman in trouble.
你指的是拳击手的妻子，被绑架的玛丽吧？ You mean Mary, the boxer's wife who was just kidnapped?
-是啊，你知道点什么？ -Right. You know anything about it? -可能知道，也可能不知道呢 -Maybe l do, maybe l don't.
她麻烦大了 She's in big trouble.
她被马丁手下的悍徒Luca看着呢 She's being held by Martin's goon, Luca.
-“goonluca”是什么？ -What's a ''goonluca''? -不，是Luca Burnett，马丁的心腹 -No, Luca Burnett. Martin's henchman.
好的，他们在哪里？ Right. Where are they?
这可是个大城市，哪里都有可能啊 lt's a big city. Could be most anyplace.
你或许想去Jim的健身房看看 You might wanna try Jim's Gym.
谢了，Johnny，随时联络 Thanks, Johnny. l'll be in touch.
-Johnny，我要做一个导管手术 -lt's a bypass operation, Johnny. -所以呢？ -So?
病人有窦性心动过缓的病史 The guy has a history of sinus bradycardia.
我可什么都不知道啊 l wouldn't know anything about it.
-给他服用阿托品了吗？ -You got him on atropine? -当然 -Of course.
中线开胸，剥离隐静脉 Do a midline thoracotomy, strip the saphenous vein,
当心别把心肌刺穿 be careful not to puncture the myocardium.
今晚的比赛，十五个回合的 Tonight's main event, 1 5 rounds
世界冠军拳击赛 for the Championship of the WorId.
这边的家伙，体重210磅 In this corner, weighing 210 pounds
这个黑壮的家伙，是目前的冠军 in the dark trunks is the current champion,
查普 the Champ.
杰克和吉尔上了山，我要打烂你的脸（上半句为童谣） Jack and Jill went up the hill, l'm gonna break your face!
我要打烂你的脸 l'm gonna break your face!
-不！不！不！救命啊！ -No! No! No! Help! -警察！ -Police squad!
-你被捕了！ -You're under arrest! -不可能！Ray！ -No way, Ray!
别动，Luca，我的枪已经顶到你肋骨上了 All right, Luca, l've got a gun in your ribs.
我不是Luca，这里也不是肋骨 l'm not Luca and those aren't my ribs.
库珀，尝尝我的子弹吧 Eat lead, copper!
-玛丽你没事吧？ -Mary, you all right? -没事 -Yes.
我也没事 So am l.
-现在呢？ -How about now? -现在？ -Now?
不怎么好 Not so good.
第十二个回合马上开始了 We're about to start the 12th round.
请记住这件事，巴德·布里吉斯还没打完过全场 And remember, Buddy Briggs has never gone the distance.
到了现在，我也不能判断谁更厉害 At this point, I'd say it couId go either way.
两位拳手都很强壮，可是也都累了 Both men are strong, but tired.
随时来一记重拳都能终结比赛 And one punch couId end it at any moment.
一，二 One, two,
-三 -three... -玛丽 -Mary, Mary.
每一场重要比赛你都放水 Every big fight you've ever been in, you've taken a dive.
我会给你安排跟查普的一场比赛，也许你能赢 I'II get you a fight with the Champ and then maybe you'II be a winner.
赢家 A winner.
没有哪个地方能像家里那样 There's no pIace Iike home.
Em伯母 Auntie Em!
还有Toto，还有Toto！ And Toto, too! And Toto, too!
-你永远是个废物！ -You'll always be a bum! -巴德 -Buddy!
...六，七 ...six, seven,
八，九... eight, nine...
-能看见几个手指？ -How many fingers do you see? -星期四？ -Thursday.
-胜利者！ -The winner! -Yeah, Mary!
Yeah, Mary!
Mary! Yeah!
冠军，你对这场胜利有什么感受吗？ How do you feel about the victory, Champ?
太棒了！这不仅是我个人的胜利，也是拳击的胜利 Great! lt's not only a victory for me, but for all of boxing.
我要告发某些试图控制比赛 'Cause l'd like to tell you about some cheap crooks
卑鄙无耻的小人 who are trying to ruin the game.
蒙塔古·马丁 Montague Martin!
-凯利！ -Kelly! -我是警探Frank Drebin -The name is Detective Frank Drebin
同时也是一个拳击迷 and l'm a boxing fan.
-我擦... -What the... -好啦，马丁 -All right, Martin,
你最后一搏也完事了 you've fixed your last fight.
从现在开始，城里的拳手都会干净地参加比赛 From now on, the boxers in this town will lose honestly.
Buddy! Buddy!
-Buddy! Buddy! -Mary!
-Hi, Ed. -Hi, Frank.
-劳驾 -Excuse me. -好 -Yep.
这里是Drebin，给我接Pete Preussing Drebin here. Get me Pete Preussing.
告诉他我需要马丁和莎莉·德克尔的最终报告 Tell him l'd like the final report on Martin and Sally Decker.
好的 Right.
咱有了个新的冠军了啊 Looks like we got a new champ, huh?
是啊 Well,
看来我又能重新看看体育版了 looks like l can get back to reading the sport pages now.
说到体育版，我看他们把你的朋友马丁带进来了啊 Speaking of sports pages, l see they're bringing your friend Martin in now.
你以为你是个大人物吗，Drebin You think you're a big man, Drebin,
我可告诉你，我会反驳你们的指控 but l'm telling you, l'm gonna beat this rap.
别指望那个了，马丁 Don't count on that, Martin.
看来你和你的同伙从现在开始 Looks like you and your cohorts'll be doing your boxing
要在Statesville监狱里继续你们的拳击事业了 up at the Statesville Prison from now on.
下周同一时间，请继续收看Police Squad Be sure to tune in next week for another exciting story
带来的精彩故事 from the fiIes of Police Squad!