My Favorite Season
Departure.
She put on boots and overalls. Dad would drive.
We were all alone in the forest.
Suddenly she'd tell him to stop. Somehow she knew it was the right place.
She got out of the car.
With a cane, she plowed through the dead leaves.
She would stop at a tree.
Any old tree. She pushed away the leaves to uncover the treasure.
Enormous mushrooms. She always guessed right.
How did you do it?
Once l tried. l chose a tree. Of course there was nothing.
lt's like animals. You can't think.
How are they? Maybe the garlic was a bad idea.
That's the way they do them, garlic and parsley. They're fine.
But l'm not used to eating late. Do you mind if l go to bed?
Of course not, Mom. Feel at home here.
Don't get up. Good night.
Mom?
He wasn't happy, but it worked out.
He didn't want to tell me l don't understand.
l always feel strange when l'm in new places.
l can't sleep. But l get used to it.
What? l don't feel strange.
l relax all day long, so at night l walk around.
l like walking at night. At my house too.
Did you hear me talking?
Vaguely.
lt happens. Sometimes l talk to myself.
What was l saying?
l couldn't really hear.
Don't worry.
l have fake conversations. l blow off steam.
lt doesn't hurt anyone and it helps me.
lt's less exhausting than talking to someone real.
lt may seem strange...
but it's normal. It's old age.
A kind of self-defense.
You could have turned on the lights.
What for?
You don't know the house well...
You're afraid l'll break something?
Not at all. l mean you could trip.
Don't be a worrywart. With the moon, it's like daytime.
You're right.
How about some tea?
Tea? No.
Why on earth did you buy this house?
l find it pretentious, with the pool and all.
Come on, you have to wake up early. Be a good girl. Go to sleep.
You're staying up?
Please, Emilie, don't fret over me.
l hate that.
...pretentious... l told her...
lf it makes me happy, who can stop me?
No kiss?
Let's go. You have a minute?
- Yes, but... - No buts, no buts.
Seeing you is visual. It occurs in the right hemisphere.
But saying Emilie is verbal. It occurs in the left hemisphere.
l haven't seen you in three years and l'm lecturing. l'm awful.
No, it's your life. And it's fascinating.
Spare me the small talk.
Why don't you drop the bad news on me now?
l'm here to talk about Mom.
She had a dizzy spell. It wasn't very serious.
The mailman found her lying in the barn.
When was this?
A month ago.
She didn't want us telling you. You know her.
You mean she had a stroke?
Yes.
But she's staying with me. She's fine, solid as a rock.
Don't overdo it.
Now l get it.
This little unexpected visit.
l have to go.
Can't we have lunch?
Some other time.
ln three years. Or ten. Maybe sooner, at Mom's funeral.
That's disgusting.
lt's my usual disgusting self. You're great.
You take care of Mom. You force yourself to come here.
And l pay for your clean conscience.
You haven't changed, Antoine. It's a shame.
We can't leave like this.
lt's better. At Dad's funeral you insulted me.
All you do is insult me.
At Dad's funeral?
You told the kids Bruno was a stupid oaf.
l was drunk. l was joking.
Joke about yourself.
You know how neurotic l am.
Stop. That's no excuse.
You're selfish, spoilt, holier-than-thou...
You're right, Emilie. Let's eat.
ltalian or Chinese?
Only if you're normal. Calm.
Normal, calm, the story of your life.
Listen, Antoine. l'm serious. Don't ever judge my life. Okay?
Okay. l swear.
Have they come yet? For the settlement.
lt's at 4:30.
Rhadija, you said 3:30.
- l wrote it in your calendar. - Really?
Look.
l was positive. l rushed back. Bring me the file.
Your husband wanted to read it first.
Unbelievable.
He's in a meeting.
Why must you double-check everything l do?
l want my file.
You stick your nose in all my big cases.
We work together.
l don't mind when you give me advice. On the contrary.
What's wrong with it?
The paragraph about indexing.
l told them it wasn't necessary. What else?
Otherwise it's fine.
Goodbye.
- Goodbye. - See you next week.
- Did you find the curtains? - What curtains?
At the store in Toulouse.
Right. No, they were all ugly.
Guess who l bumped into in the street? Antoine.
- Did you speak? - Obviously.
lt's not so obvious. It's been years. l thought you hated him.
He's difficult, but don't exaggerate.
You're getting soft-hearted.
- l invited him for Christmas. - Antoine?
What else could l do? He has to see his mother.
Last time, he made a scene. He lambasted the clock on the chimney.
He hates antiques.
He says you can't buy a soul. It's his problem.
He has heaps of problems.
Like everyone else.
l thought you had banished him for good.
l knew you'd be angry.
No, but he likes stirring up trouble. He's perverse.
He can be funny.
He's a total bore. Besides, clowns never made me laugh.
Your parents brought him up badly.
He's not a teenager anymore!
He's a little brat.
Excuse me, but concerning that bill of sale...
l'm a bit confused.
One false step
That must be Antoine.
Am l late?
l didn't think you'd come.
- l hoped you'd call. - l didn't dare.
Dare! Dare! You have to be bold in life.
l spent the day by the phone. It's nothing compared to three years.
l wanted you to decide.
Decide what? You invited me!
You wanted me to come. So l came. For you.
- Don't make me pay for it. - l decided to behave.
Are they heavy?
l don't have Bruno's muscles but l manage.
Right, the brain beats all.
When l come, you go.
Hello, Antoine. How was the drive?
lt wasn't that bad.
Give them to me.
Hi, Antoine.
So how's law school?
lt's like a factory. Fifty kids in every study group.
Are you coming to mass?
lt's not my thing.
But if l have to...
He came to see his mother. Right, Antoine?
Right, that's it.
Where's the toilet?
This way. See you soon. Don't catch cold.
Don't get drunk. Don't blabber. Don't clam up. Don't look bored.
Show an interest in their lives.
Anne, didn't you want to be a pianist?
Your father said no?
No, don't say that.
Emilie, it's delicious. You went out of your way.
Family life has its charm. l realize that.
Thanks for a lovely evening. l like being with you.
l never want to go home. l want to stay.
Hold on, what did l say?
Don't get carried away.
l have to hold it in
without showing it. Like Emilie.
Sorry.
Why are you here?
l was invited. But l'll leave you.
Stay. l'll go open the oysters.
Meet Radish. We're lucky she's here.
l'm looking for my mother. l'm embarrassed. l heard music.
Relax. He'll keep quiet. Won't you?
Sure. What's the problem? l think it's great.
Tonight everything is great.
Marvelous, even. Everything's marvelous.
lt's champagne time.
l said no. Now look what's happened.
Let's leave then.
Are you crazy? That's just not done.
''Just not done.'' You kill me!
l'm their guest tonight.
What a promotion!
Lucien, everything you do is against them. Even sex.
You wanted me because they're at mass. How lame!
You didn't find it lame.
You have no respect.
- You resent your parents. - They're not my parents!
You resent them because they're clean.
Clean? You fuck everyone, but you're clean.
Everyone's clean but me. l was born dirty.
Same old fucking tune.
Okay. Drop it.
Let's drop everything. Let's call it quits.
Can l turn on the lights?
lf you prefer the dark, it's fine with me.
lt's cozier.
Dark, light, same thing.
lt's all marvelous.
Cheers.
lt's me. So stop faking.
You? Why are you here?
You know, they're no fun.
Your sister tries, but she bugs me.
Take this, take that...
l say no. She insists. So l say yes.
Then she asks, ''Why didn't you ask before?''
l don't know what to say.
So l stay in my room all day.
Then there is Bruno. He's sick of me. He wants me to go.
But he's scared of your sister, so we smile politely.
The meals are the worst.
''How are you?'' ''Fine and you?'' ''Fine, fine.''
Of course, l lose my appetite.
Anne is another case.
She hammers on the piano all day. She'll break it.
Give our ears a rest.
And that Julien...
Not Julien. Lucien.
A real half-wit.
He's headed for prison or the loony bin.
You're into brains. Examine him.
He's out of place here. He wants his real family.
So, Doctor. How long have l got?
Blood pressure normal. You can come celebrate Christmas.
- Tell me, didn't you lose weight? - No.
Here.
Did you bring any presents?
l was busy. Will she mind?
Tough luck.
Cheers.
Antoine, l have a favor to ask you.
l can't stay here. l'm serious.
l want to go home.
lt's not their fault.
l exaggerated. They do try their hardest.
l don't fit in. Do you understand?
Maybe l'm wrong.
No, l hate when you're contrite. Nasty is healthier.
Come on. Get up. Make yourself pretty.
Antoine?
Was the snow a problem?
The snow wasn't, but it was a little icy.
- You drive carefully? - Of course.
- The hairpin bend? - It's a dangerous spot.
The hairpin bend before the intersection.
The cork!
That asshole aimed at me! Oh, excuse me.
You can't imagine how many eyes are gouged out at Christmas.
l'm serious. When l was an intern at the hospital...
No horror stories.
Yes! Horror stories!
Horrors, okay. But no hospitals.
Why no hospitals?
l don't like them. It's normal.
But they're the site of births and resurrections.
When you came, l felt born again.
You should visit me more often.
lt's delicious.
We eat, and when we don't eat all we talk about is food.
That's the charm of family life.
l can't believe my ears.
ls everyone sleeping over?
You're choking.
Sorry, l'm working tomorrow.
- Have some champagne. - And you, Radish?
What's it to you? And my name's Rhadija.
He's so macho.
He thinks it's cool.
- What's so fucking funny? - Relax, Lulu. We're joking.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas, Mom.
Merry Christmas, kids.
- You're not toasting? - It's not cool enough.
- Shall l play? - Yeah, l love music.
Can l come with you?
- Her music puts you to sleep. - Quiet, Lucien.
Anne plays well. Not bad at all.
lsn't it a little loud?
We can't talk. Anne, be a good girl...
l got it. Let's go in my room.
Who is Rhadija? She's wonderful.
She works at the office. She's impressive.
She studied law here. She's Moroccan.
l invited her so she wouldn't feel alone tonight.
She's very graceful.
l think there's something between her and Lucien.
Absolutely not. There's nothing between them.
lt's just an impression. It's up to them.
Did you catch cold?
Like l do every year. Churches are so cold.
- Coffee? - Yes, for the ride back.
Thank God it's stopped snowing.
l'll help you.
- You're really working tomorrow? - No, but l can't overstay my welcome.
lt went well.
They're very nice.
l made a big production of it.
That's life, a series of mistakes.
Pour me some champagne, if l'm allowed.
Of course you're allowed.
You have nothing to tell me?
What's there to say?
That you were frowning and brooding?
That you dislike my mother and brother? l've always known.
l impose them on you. l admit it, okay?
Stop lying to yourself.
And stop lying to me.
Lying? What do you mean?
You didn't bump into Antoine in the street, but in the hospital.
So? What's the difference?
The difference is you lied.
l want to know why.
l want to understand.
Understand what? It just came out.
Stop torturing me, interrogating me.
lt's as if you enjoy it.
Okay.
You're so serious. It exhausts me.
That's why l make things up.
To breathe a little.
There's really no harm in it.
You've become a mystery to me. Ever since your mother came.
Right, blame it on my mother. It's never your fault.
You're great at judging others.
Stop it.
Get your story straight, you yell at me for lying,
and then you stop me when l'm honest.
l'm easy to please. Tell me what you want,
and l'll do it.
You can be such a hypocrite.
No, l'm just tired, Bruno.
Take this in.
l'm jealous. You've got great legs.
- You should see her ass! - l'd love to.
With a body like that, l'd be proud. It's a work of art, isn't it?
Sure as shit. Radish! Striptease!
Shut your face.
Radish, please. Do it for me.
lt's aesthetic. Don't be a prude.
l'm no prude. l'm drunk.
Us too.
Let me think.
Be cool!
l know you're dying to.
l don't know. Okay, if it's art. But if it isn't, no.
- It is art. - It's not porn!
- l don't trust him. - Don't worry. l'm here.
- No pawing at me. - Sure! We're not perverts.
l have to go.
lt was marvelous. l had a wonderful time.
- Wait. l need to talk to you. - Now?
l never see you. It concerns you both.
- l'll leave you. - Please. l need you too. Sit down.
l want to settle things before l die.
Stop!
Don't talk about that. You're fine.
Mom, we have plenty of time to discuss this.
No, we don't. Antoine won't be here tomorrow.
Don't look so constipated. It's natural.
- Isn't it, Bruno? - l don't know.
Have you written something?
No.
l can't write. l didn't go to school. That's why l need you.
This pisses me off.
l can't stand this. It's too horrible.
Don't make it worse.
We have to talk about it.
Well, l don't have to.
Why do we have to talk about it?
Tell me why! l don't want to. l prefer to leave.
- Don't be a baby. - A baby? He's asking for it.
- Fuck you! - Stop, Antoine!
You're a fool. A fool and a coward.
Stop! You're crazy! What's going on?
- He'll never set foot here again! - Quiet!
Stay with your family. l'm going to bed.
Get on with the will.
Go ahead, Mom.
- You're an ass, Antoine! - l'm an ass.
Let's get it over with.
l shouldn't have come.
l knew it.
Last week l had a dream.
We were all here, and l broke something.
The clock.
The clock on the chimney.
The one over there.
You're sick, Antoine. Really sick. Here.
l'm ashamed. No kidding, l am.
Don't say that.
You were right. He insulted you. He scorns you. He scorns me too.
How can you say that, after...
After all he did for me? Don't be offended, Emilie.
You defend your husband. l defend my son. It's only normal.
Fighting was silly. Forget it.
l'm worried about my will.
Dividing up what your father left me.
That's enough for tonight.
For me, it's easy. l don't want anything.
Leave everything to Emilie: house, land, and stock.
Never! You'll take what's yours!
l want nothing.
Stop, Antoine. Let her get it over with.
l can't stand this. See you later.
When is later?
When you're back home.
The sooner the better. Take me now. l'll go pack.
Sorry to bother you.
Anne, can you lower the music?
What happened?
- And you're laughing! - What a work of art!
- What will they think? - Take a lucky guess.
- You need serious help. - Don't humiliate me.
We were having fun. Shit! That hurt.
Try respecting me.
l do, Radish. Let's make up.
Don't touch me!
You're sterical.
Hysterical. Try learning French.
You know why you want to make up? To have sex.
No way. Next time, if there is a next time,
you better deserve it. You better be a gentleman.
- You're plastered. - Good night, Lucien.
Here. You'll catch a cold.
Antoine, don't try making up.
l'll talk to her.
l'll get her to stay.
No, take her.
lt's better this way. Leave, both of you.
Don't stare at me. Help her pack.
- Does it hurt? - No, not at all.
Relax. Let me see your eyelid.
A fist-fight. Men can be so dumb.
Antoine and Lucien are the same. You can tell they're sick.
For others, it's hard to tell.
There's a guy at school. Blonde, polite,
hitting on me, but subtly: your classic hypocrite.
But maybe he's nice after all.
How can l know for sure?
What did you do when a girl liked you?
Ask your mother.
My mother should be here. How could she leave you alone?
She left her chocolate.
Can't you do this tomorrow? It's after 5:00.
Never leave things unfinished,
or they obsess you
and spoil your life.
Do you mind if l sleep here?
What's wrong? Are you really serious?
l need to be alone. l'll sleep better here.
lt has nothing to do with you.
Don't fight. Forget l asked.
For once you know what you want. Now l understand.
Really? Lucky you. l'd like to understand.
l'll explain then.
lt's simple. You're a cripple.
You can't love anything or anyone.
You try hard, but you fail.
You tried with me.
ln the beginning, the first year.
Fortunately Anne came along. A child changes things.
You organized everything around her.
lf you can't organize, you're lost.
So you wanted another. We couldn't. We adopted Lucien.
Now they're big, they're far away. And we're alone. Just the two of us.
And you want us to sleep apart.
lt's funny how you see it.
Like you're studying a file.
When l met you, l found you stable,
solid, reassuring. l was happy.
We cut classes, made love in hotels near the train station.
We were full of hope.
And now
l look at you and find you as cold as a calculator.
l find you contemptuous.
l find you old.
You've aged badly, Bruno.
Maybe as we grow older, we lose our souls.
Maybe l too, l've become old,
unbearable, boring. l don't know.
All life long we never see ourselves.
Then one day, it hits you.
l hate what we've become.
What we've both become. It disgusts me.
So what do we do?
Separate?
l don't know.
lt might be better.
lt's more honest than sleeping apart.
l can't believe it. Not again.
- Who's there? - It's me. Open up.
- Is it you, Anne? - Yes.
Why did you lock the door?
You saw me naked. Your father saw me naked.
Lucien saw me naked. l'm a basket case.
- Do you like your room? - It's fine.
Not too small?
Do you mind if l sleep with you?
l move around a lot. l snore too.
lt'll calm me. But there's one thing l hate: smelly feet.
May l?
- Perfect. What's wrong? - That tickled.
Sorry.
Which side do you want? l don't care.
Me neither, but...
l'm not, l mean...
l don't sleep with girls.
Me neither.
But l don't trust boys.
l can't talk to them. It's a power play.
That scares me.
l've always wanted a sister. Haven't you?
ls that just a come-on?
Too bad you don't trust me.
l didn't say that. This is just new to me. Wait.
Come on.
Thanks, Rhadija.
Thank you.
l feel good.
What about you?
l feel good too.
What's wrong? Why are you crying?
lt's nothing.
Seriously, can you be my sister?
- l barely know you. - It doesn't matter.
We'll share our secrets. l'll accept you as you are.
Will you accept me?
l guess.
- You think it's possible? - l know it is. If we want it to be.
This is all your chocolate? l'll take two.
- How much? - 12 francs.
Merry Christmas.
You shouldn't live alone far from everyone.
- But my apartment is... - In Toulouse?
Sixth floor, no elevator in a city?
Crowds, cars, noise... l wouldn't last a day.
Once your father and l went to Paris.
For the Agricultural Show.
lt was before Emilie was born.
He wanted to stay longer.
l had diarrhea. l spent a week in the john.
The day we went home, it was completely over.
You know your father.
He said l planned it. He brooded for years.
No more trips afterwards.
There was Capbreton.
That was summer vacation not a trip.
Don't drive so fast, Antoine.
l fell asleep.
Why did you let me?
You needed it.
lt stopped snowing. Now you can drive safely.
Every time l come here, it's very strange.
As if l never grew up, time stands still.
l have to get dressed for school, run to the bus
as if nothing's happened since.
l have to think hard
to remember l've done other things.
What time is it?
9:15.
You'll never use a watch. You should have taken your father's.
lt's not waterproof. You have to wind it.
You have enough wood?
Enough for now. Tomorrow the house will be warm again.
l have to go.
Wait. l made you coffee.
Something's been troubling me for a while.
Don't get angry. It's unimportant but...
l need to know.
l want you to tell me the truth.
l've always... l've always felt you had a bone to pick with me.
Tell me what it is now.
Before...
before l lose my mind.
There's nothing. l don't get it.
So it's all in my head.
Sometimes l pretend l talk to your father and he blames me.
lt's strange. As if l prevented him from living.
From living?
Yes, living. Plain old living.
From partaking in little pleasures,
all for himself.
l didn't plan it that way.
But he was happy.
- He told you so? - l could see he was.
No, you can't see happiness.
- Finish your coffee. - l have to go.
One day, this house will be yours.
Don't start that again.
You want the grocer to come by?
On Christmas Day?
l'll tell him you're back.
Don't worry about me. My cupboard is full.
Take a look at this.
The next step
- Drunk already? - If you deign to see me again,
the news must be bad.
As bad as your voice on the phone. Shoot. l'm ready.
Please. It's hard enough.
l need your help.
Have a drink.
Mom fell again. She can't live alone.
The castle's off-limits to her since the incident?
The castle is Bruno's.
After the incident, l prefer not to ask him.
l'm sure if you insist.
- l won't ask Bruno. - Why?
l'll spare you my life story.
Can you?
- Can you take her? - Are you crazy? Have you seen my place?
One room, no elevator. l'm never there. She'd never want to.
Yes, she would.
l asked her.
She was really scared.
l've never seen her this way. For the first time, she...
She seems vulnerable. Besides, she adores you.
Where can l put her? You're being ridiculous.
lt's normal.
lt's a real problem.
- You don't understand... - Yes, l do.
l thought it over.
l brought this to show you.
lt's close by.
She'll feel at home. She knows people there. l'll visit her.
Throw her in a retirement home?
What else can we do?
You tell me, Antoine.
Crying won't help, Emilie. l hate when you cry.
You make me take care of it all and then you criticize.
Like when we were kids.
Now we're grown-ups. Together, we'll solve this.
How? l can't take her neither can you.
We'll figure it out, Emilie. Come on.
Take your bag.
Let's go.
Go on. l'm coming.
l'm sure you've never been drunk.
l'm off to a good start. l hope it won't depress me.
- You always liked liquor. - Call me a boozehound. Insult me.
lt's true l like to drink. It's only human.
But l hold my liquor well.
You hold your liquor well? That's a good one!
l love you, Antoine.
Really, l love you very much.
lt's easy to say, after you've downed a few.
For three years, you didn't show it much.
You know what l did once?
l drove to Blagnac, near your house.
l hid and watched you.
You did that?
You were planting carrots, l think. l was far off.
Very far off. l never had a vegetable garden.
Mom found the house too big. Pretentious. Once, she told me that.
Why found? She still finds.
Will Bruno allow her back?
l don't live with Bruno anymore.
We work together, but that's all.
l'm at a hotel in Toulouse.
- Since when? - Since Christmas.
Don't be like that, Antoine.
Everything is fine.
l swear it is.
- What's wrong? - l'll be right back.
Relax, Antoine. You're thrilled, but don't show it.
Don't look elated or overjoyed. Don't laugh. Don't cry.
No excess. No excess at all.
At last, Emilie. l've waited 20 years.
Finally you left him. Forget about him. It's over.
Excuse me.
Make way, please.
You've never seen someone faint before?
Breathe.
Deeper.
Breathe. Open your eyes.
Do you feel better?
Are you okay?
Stand up.
There you go.
Do you want to walk a little?
My hotel is near the station.
Don't talk. Don't get all worked up.
l can't. l don't have any energy.
l never had any energy. That's my problem.
That's great. l'm sick of energy. It's an epidemic.
Energy, performance, action.
All this energy scares me.
lt's because we have nothing left to do.
lnternally, l mean.
Even externally. Look at what happens today.
You get a profession, you work,
if you're lucky, you advance. That's all.
Finding the energy to act is easy.
Giving meaning to your actions is the hard part.
Maybe that's why l regret everything l do.
Like having left Bruno?
No, but l'm afraid to regret it.
You never regret anything.
With the bullshit l've done? All l do is regret!
But regretting helps you move onto new things.
Things you wouldn't have done before.
What you do isn't important. It's what you do next.
A false step matters less than the next step.
l'm in the middle of taking my next step.
l left the house. Maybe l was wrong, maybe not.
l wonder, in the course of a life when is an action necessary?
l can only talk like this with you.
Me too.
lt's like when Mom used to yell at us for talking all night long.
Mom?
Why bother your brother?
l didn't want to come alone.
l wanted to come along.
Don't let this go to waste.
l have one spare key.
But l can leave you mine.
Where l'm going, l won't need it.
l'm ready.
lt's nothing.
lt's just nerves.
Antoine!
Why did she kill them?
Come on.
Guess who l saw.
Miss Redach. You know, the seamstress.
She's been there five years.
She likes it a lot. The staff are nice.
Remember her?
Of course. l'm not senile.
She made my wedding gown.
Why didn't she marry?
Are you kidding?
She's ugly as sin. And pathetic,
with eyes like a dead billy goat.
Do you mind going by Saint-Loup?
- We always dreamt of swimming here. - We were never allowed.
You were afraid of polio.
And Dad was afraid for the fish.
lt was his favorite spot.
The carp didn't taste like mud here.
He didn't catch many carp.
Fishing was just an excuse.
Did you see that cornfield?
He sold his first farm tools there.
He was so proud.
lt was before you were born.
We got in debt: building the hangar.
That was before the workshop. He worked all alone.
What are you doing?
l'm turning an old dream into reality.
That boy is crazy.
Stop him, Emilie.
lf he wants to swim.
Here. For your room.
No, l can't arrive with flowers.
Should l go by Donzac?
lt's too far out of the way.
- We have time. - Plenty of time.
Do you want some music?
Before, you didn't need music.
You would sing the whole car ride long.
''It's time to go a-hunting all over Alaska.''
''The cold we'll be confronting, so put on your parka.''
''Scarface Billy does admit he's chilly.''
''We're leaving readily.''
''At the sound of the whip we can start the trip.''
''By the moon we're led as we plow ahead.''
''On our genuine Alaskan dog-drawn sled.''
''Our faithful huskies make our lives a breeze.''
''As they run with ease.''
''So we tug the rope and sing a song of hope.''
''Billy ho, Billy ho hay ho.''
''And the wind does blow and the sled does go.''
''Silently through the virgin snow.''
l'm Genevieve Costello. Delighted to meet you.
We'll take the suitcase.
This is my son, Antoine Dupuy.
He's an important brain surgeon in Toulouse. Aren't you, Antoine?
l do a little research.
He's very modest. You should be proud.
You've met my daughter?
Yes, she arranged things.
That's her specialty. She's a lawyer.
She has a big practice with her husband.
My children have succeeded. l took good care of them.
They should take care of me now.
But these days, they're all too busy.
Room 11.
Don't just stand there. Leave.
You've wasted enough time.
Don't just stand there!
l'll show you to your room. So long.
l know she'll hate it.
No, Emilie. Who can tell?
We'll visit her next week see how she's doing.
- Do you want this? - You won't have it?
l'm not hungry.
l made sure she has a TV in her room.
Calm down.
You always waste your life feeling guilty.
Even when there is no reason to.
You always need to punish yourself.
Whenever people found you pretty,
it stressed you out. You felt it unfair, a flaw.
You were every boy's fantasy, every girl's ideal.
But no, you panicked.
l was the only one to benefit.
l'm not like you.
l wasn't made to be happy.
Where are you going?
Nowhere. l feel like walking.
Looking back on our childhood, what pops first into your head?
We talked non-stop. But l can't remember what about.
We said we'd never grow apart.
That we'd figure out a way not to die.
Maybe that led me into brains.
You wanted to be a prima ballerina.
l have a photo of you in a tutu, Iooking into the air.
You're often like that in photos, like you want to fly.
The July Jubilee! l had such stage fright!
l could never have become a dancer.
You're lucky to do what you wanted to.
You're strong.
No, l'm not. l'm simple. My life is very simple.
There was you, then the brain. l couldn't fail.
That's being strong. Not side-stepping.
And the thing to stop dying?
Why not? Anyway, you'll be the first to know.
lt doesn't interest me anymore.
lsn't everyone interested? Now you don't care about dying?
l wonder.
You know, sometimes l feel useless, like Dad.
l get it from him. He was like that.
Mom had her feet on the ground, like you.
You always said l lived in a dream world.
You both dream, but with your feet on the ground.
You know what you want.
Dad was always searching. Searching his niche.
He never found it.
Didn't you notice?
He always concealed his doubts.
He never felt at home. He fled.
Once l went to see him in his workshop. He was sitting alone on a stool.
He was so absent. l didn't dare disturb him.
l left.
l'm sure he was always like that. Never close to anyone.
l'm sort of like that.
Will you take me back?
No way.
- Take me back to my hotel. - No, l'm kidnapping you.
That's the way it is, Iet's go.
18, 19, 20, and 21.
Sorry, l just have one pair of pajamas.
Can l turn around?
You wear it well.
You still wear this? It's not too small?
You stop growing at 18. You know that.
Where will you sleep?
l'm on duty tonight. When should l wake you?
At 8:00. l have my alarm.
l have a meeting tomorrow. l hope l'll be presentable.
Drink this, you'll be fresh as a daisy.
Are you drugging me?
lt will clear your head. Don't ask, drink.
The windows. Open or closed?
lt depends on the noise.
For your ears, closed.
My ears?
They're oversensitive. You always think we're screaming.
l'm trying to talk softly now. You never noticed?
Are you serious?
Sure l am. Don't run to our nearest ENT.
They're sadists. You wouldn't wear glasses if you saw too well.
What's the reason? Another brain thing?
- Should l explain? - Not tonight, Antoine. Some other time.
Tomorrow. l'll see you tomorrow, won't l?
We'll see.
You don't spend every night alone at the hotel?
What else should l do?
Don't stare at me. It suits me fine.
You have no lover?
No, that's not my thing.
l don't want a lover, l don't want a husband
l don't want anything. Really. l swear.
You can't live like a vegetable.
We'll see each other every day.
You'll get bored, Antoine.
With you? Are you kidding?
Believe me.
lt's already happened with Anne. And Lucien too.
When l came to Toulouse l hoped to have time,
to try getting closer to them.
l realized l bored the hell out of them.
They want to forget me.
They don't see me as a person. They see me as a mother
who tries too hard to protect them,
who worries so much that they can't breathe, can't live.
But that's normal.
Yes, it is. That's why l decided to leave them alone.
Not to burden them.
l hope l didn't lose it. l lose everything.
There it is.
Look how funny this is.
l've discovered life is great.
Your discovery sucks. Life is shit.
Don't say that. People are fantastic.
And it's springtime.
People piss me off. Especially girls. They bust my balls.
Remember Radish?
She comes every night. With her sister Nena.
Anne calls herself Nena.
- They're inside? - Like l said. Every night.
Even Mondays.
Just to bug me.
lt'll finish in a bloodbath. Believe me.
Closing time!
He hates us having fun!
House rules. Sorry.
Sorry my ass. You're showing off! Retard!
Stow it, cunt!
l'll kill that fuckbrain!
Let me go!
You'll eat your balls! l'll knock out your brains!
Relax. It's nothing.
They're just words. Just words.
Come on.
Cunt? That's no way to talk.
She started.
Don't cry, Radish.
lt's not serious. He got carried away, that's all.
Don't tell.
Tell who?
At the office.
l'll keep quiet, if we all have a drink together.
No way.
We'd better leave them.
What's wrong?
l know him from school.
l thought he liked me. l goofed again.
No school today?
No, l quit. It's over for good.
l'm not the lawyer type. Too bad.
So what do you do?
l sleep. l think about what to do.
l'll get a part-time job.
And your father? What does he say?
Nothing. Since Mom left, nothing. A brick wall.
At first, l went home every night to take care of him.
But he refused.
He wants to be alone. He was never into emotions.
l'm not surprised. Pride is something awful.
Who's the Ken doll with your sister?
Probably another ex. You thought you were the first?
My brother, a friend, Jean-Luc.
Lend me some money.
No way. Get a job.
They're hard to find. 100 francs. l'll give it back.
Yeah, right.
Try saying thanks.
l was going to. Thanks.
Radish, we need to talk.
Bad timing.
Here's my number. Call me whenever.
l'm listening, Lucien.
Talk or beat it.
l keep thinking of you.
l think l love you.
lt's true.
l have a hard-on. Just knowing you're here.
lt's not normal. It's love, isn't it?
You mix everything up.
lt's not love. It's desire. They're different.
Desire. If it makes me sick
if it makes my head explode, it becomes love. No?
lt's possible.
Let me sleep with you.
l don't want to start over.
Do you see your mother?
No. l think she's dangerous.
Dangerous?
Yeah, like Grandma. And you.
Your side of the family is crazy. All three of you.
Sorry to be so blunt.
- Padded-cell crazy? - Yeah.
- You're overdoing it. - No, l'm not.
Dad tried to get Mom back, to redo things.
But you came back. Three against one. He didn't have a chance.
lf she had a boyfriend, he'd put up a fight. But now...
Now it's different, deeper.
We have dark forces in us.
Stop. It's perverted. l'll never be on your side.
Squeeze in, Lucien.
''But in the meantime.''
''l go la la la la.''
''Time passes by.''
''The end is nigh.''
''Life ends in a sigh.''
''Soon l will die.''
''But in the meantime.''
''l see the goodbye.''
''l hear its sad cry.''
''And l go la la la.''
''We'll dance to its sigh.''
''We'll sing la la la.''
''For soon we will die.''
''Time passes by.''
''The end is nigh.''
''Life ends in a sigh.''
''Soon l will die.''
''But in the meantime....''
- What time is it? - l don't know.
Return
This peach, my occipital lobe sees it.
My temporal lobe says, ''lt looks good.''
My parietal lobe says, ''l'll eat it.''
My prefrontal lobe says, ''l'll bite it.''
My motor cortex does so. My somesthetic cortex supervises.
And my brain is thrilled. Get it?
lt's easy.
l feel you want to turn me into a peach.
Food is the only real link between man and nature.
The only one.
You're not food. You're a person. l won't eat you.
But for you, l feel people don't mean much.
lt depends who.
l want to make you happy.
Look at this apartment. You have sun, trees, the river.
Everything you like.
You can't prefer the hotel.
That's not the problem.
What then? What's missing? Your house, your husband?
No, Antoine. That's not it.
l wonder if it isn't a little absurd,
a brother and a sister living together.
- At our age, it seems a little silly. - What do we care?
Still, it's not very normal.
No, it's very normal. Biologically normal.
Two brains from one tummy.
You'll say anything.
-Two brains, one tummy. You're so weird! - l'll explain.
No, don't. You have theories for everything.
Living together isn't a theory. You've always lived alone.
Listen, Emilie, l busted my ass.
l found us a gorgeous apartment.
lf you don't like it, the door is there.
- Don't shout. - l'm not.
l didn't say l don't want to.
l just said l'm not sure we have the right,
the right to live like this. Or l don't have the right to.
Bullshit. You have the right to be happy.
That's what counts.
You're too proud. You miss life's simplest pleasures.
lt's disgusting.
What are you scared of?
l'm scared of you, Antoine. That's all.
We were too close.
We're not kids anymore. You won't accept it. It scares me.
Who says we're not kids? What is an adult?
Leaving your husband? Being left by your kids?
That's ridiculous.
Stop trying to be an adult. That's your problem.
One lifetime isn't enough.
Besides, now they say time doesn't even exist.
l lived 20 years with you. My first 20 years.
Despite that, you see me wrong. You think l'm fearless.
lt's not true. l was always sick.
Remember l was poisoned by snails once.
You ate more and you were fine.
You were stronger. l was a weakling.
You taught me everything.
Without you, l wouldn't enjoy living.
She refused to come to meals. She claimed the elevator was broken.
l moved her downstairs. But she still won't come eat.
l understand. We'll try reasoning with her.
Maybe she's sleeping.
Why are you here?
l came to see you.
l thought you'd had an accident. It was on TV.
l saw the wreck:,lots of people. You were there.
They said your name.
l wasn't surprised. You drive too fast. Like a madman.
We warned you, your father and l.
You don't listen. So look what happened.
They said it was a shame. You were young.
Such a waste of life.
They'll say anything on TV, Mom.
Who are you with?
lt's me, Mom.
lt's you. Why are you hiding?
Always hiding behind your brother.
Were you at the accident too?
They can't mention all the victims.
There was no accident. Look.
You think they can trick me?
l can't help it, but l know everything.
The other night, the house burned. Because of the storm.
Your father forgot to buy a lightning rod.
He forgets everything. He'll forget his name.
But thanks all the same.
lt was sweet to come get me. Because l can't stay here.
The other day, a man left.
They caught him.
We'll pack your things. Help me, Emilie.
You have to pay Collettte. The hairdresser.
She comes once a week. To tidy me up.
l'll wear the coat.
ln this heat?
l don't care. l don't want to look like a hobo.
What is it now? l can't get any peace.
lt's nothing. Just a storm.
Go on. Dress her.
You diagnosed high blood pressure? That's all? You're stupid!
You're a murderer! l'll sue you!
- l'm sorry. - It's easy to be sorry.
As her son and as a doctor you could have noticed.
Fuck you.
We'll deal with the bill later.
Look. It's still there. There was no fire.
Stop shaking. It won't hurt.
Look at the light.
Follow it.
Very good. Now the left.
Perfect.
Now look up.
Very good.
Stand up. Can you walk?
Now take my finger. Squeeze it hard.
Harder.
Harder, Mom. Go ahead.
Good.
Put your feet together.
Close your eyes.
Very good.
Can l sit now?
Lie down.
l'm going to tickle you.
lt's all over.
Come lie down in your bed.
Don't worry. This won't hurt.
Are you okay?
Lie down.
Close your eyes, please.
You can open your eyes. Don't move. We'll start now.
So?
She's had a cerebral hemorrhage.
You saw how she loses track of time.
A blocked artery created a lesion.
ls she dying?
lt's serious.
l got her a room. l'll take care of her.
Don't stay here. l'll see you tonight.
- Can l see her? - No.
No. She needs to rest.
l'll call you a taxi.
Don't bother. l'll manage. Go on, Antoine.
Your father wants to talk to you.
Sit down.
Come on, say it.
Would you like a little brother?
No, l don't need one. l'm fine like this.
Emilie, you'll feel less lonely.
l'm not lonely. l have you.
You said Bruno was away. l saw the light. Open up.
Don't play with me! You know me!
Don't push me!
Answer me or l'll break down the door.
l need to be alone. Go away!
Let's not wake up the neighborhood!
You weren't at the apartment. You owe me an explanation.
That's all l want. It's only normal.
All l want is to sleep.
Let's stop this show, Emilie. Open the door.
Stop making a scene. Scram!
- Why are you so mean? - Because the show's over.
l don't want to see you anymore.
l'm going to bed. Keep on screaming. l have ear plugs.
The neighbor's dog hates noise. He's mean.
Raise hell. Be my guest!
Why didn't you come? Why did you lock yourself in here?
Let me take your pulse.
You hit me. Do you realize you hit me?
Touch me and l'll do it again.
What's got into you? What did l do? What did you do?
Should l tell you? Can't you figure it out?
lt's normal. You always avoid the truth.
What truth? What is this about?
You're a doctor.
You knew she had dizzy spells. You didn't do a thing.
Do you realize you did nothing?
You could have saved her.
lt's as if you wanted to get rid of her.
You're blaming me for that?
l didn't think she could die.
l didn't want to deal with it.
But you're using that to...
You've humiliated me before.
At Capbreton, l stole some records.
You made me return them in front of everyone.
You like it when l feel ashamed.
lt excites you,
makes you feel better.
- You have no right. - Stop always talking about rights.
Rights and laws. You hide behind the law.
For you, that's all life is.
Your job, the law. Your husband, the law.
You're a public menace! Get lost!
l wish you never existed!
You'd like that, wouldn't you?
You'd be her favorite.
All you feel for her is hatred.
Hatred, nothing else.
She doesn't love you enough. Not enough for you.
Despite all your efforts to please her.
lt must be horrible to hate your own mother.
Help.
l fell from my balcony.
This beats all. You're such a pain in the ass.
You try to hurt me.
Your blackmail is just playacting.
Let's cross.
You could have died.
lt was against me. Don't deny it.
l'm not. l'm the silent, stoic type.
- Stoic? You're grotesque. - Grotesque and proud of it.
You want to go by foot, don't you?
lt's far, l'm in major pain, and l'm fed up.
Okay, we'll take a cab.
lt's funny you can't drive.
lt must mean something.
l don't care what it means.
- Hail the taxi! - Just shut up. Come on. Shit!
- Hail it. - It's too late now.
lt's a lesion in the right thalamic region.
The ventricles are clotted.
The dense lesion is the result of a hemorrhage.
There is no focal lesion nor any other anomaly.
l was right after all.
You had an accident. Why did you hide it?
Will l be here long?
There are more tests to do.
Pure routine.
lf you're tired, don't talk.
Right, Antoine?
At my age, it's normal to be tired.
Where will l go after?
l don't want to go back to that home. They're strangers.
You won't go back there.
l promise. Don't worry.
Just keep calm.
lt's your father's fault.
Just try resting.
He wanted you to be modern.
Modern. That was his big word. He kept saying:
''They should go to school
so they can be better,
better than us. Because we
were not equipped to succeed--
to succeed in today's world. With progress and everything.''
He dreamed you'd become what you are now: modern.
l'm sure he's happy.
As for me, my only regret
is not to have had
another child.
Because maybe he
would have taken me in
and it wouldn't have been a problem,
you understand?
Excuse me. l bought the Terral's house: behind the forest.
Your roof, l mean your mother's roof, was badly damaged in the storm.
Damaged?
By the lightning?
Yes. You should get it repaired.
Maybe the inside was damaged too. You should go see.
For the repairs, l know someone.
Thank you. l'll take care of it.
Are there any eggs at home?
l doubt there are enough...
How many are we? Seven.
l'll go buy some.
Wait. l'll come.
No. Don't bother. l'll take care of it.
Come: Antoine. Don't stay here.
Don't shake me or l'll fall flat on my face.
l want to play the piano.
No, Nena. Not today. That's not done.
l'm shaken up.
You met her just once, at Christmas.
She was a real bitch.
But she had character.
Maybe it was her age.
Next to her, we're all weaklings.
l couldn't talk to you. So l wrote this.
l've had it for a while. Whenever l saw you at the office,
l wanted to stay cold.
To show you l was strong, independent...
l rewrote it every day. It seemed off. l kept missing the point.
l'm used to writing letters. But for emotions...
l'm illiterate.
l'll set the table.
Wait.
Maybe we can eat outside.
That's a good idea.
How long do you have to wear the cast?
Three weeks. It's a long time.
Especially in this heat.
l broke my leg skiing.
Luckily it was winter.
l didn't know you skied.
You never asked.
l love mountains.
Snow especially.
Winter is my favorite season.
Dad, what is your favorite season?
Autumn, but don't ask me why.
Everything's a mystery with you. Try opening up.
lt's autumn, because it's always the beginning:
beginning of the year, of school.
Once, when l was at school l saw your mother.
Now you know why.
And you, Lulu?
Spring. Because of the babes.
They dress less. You can see their shapes, legs.
lt figures.
And you, Nena? What's your favorite season?
l don't know.
That's why l'm asking.
You're lucky to know.
And you, Antoine?
l'm like Emilie. It's summer.
Sorry. l'm exhausted.
lt's this fucking leg...
We all need a rest.
Can l drop off Antoine in your car?
lf you want to sleep here,
there are plenty of rooms.
No thanks, Bruno. l'll go home.
l'll drive you back.
No, Emilie. Don't complicate things. l need to be alone.
l'll call you tonight.
l won't be home.
l'll be in a disco. l like watching people dance.
There's nothing nicer. Will you be there, kids?
l have to. l'm working.
Tonight, it's maybe
improper.
lmproper or not, l'm going.
Rhadija will dance for you, okay?
Okay.
Stay longer. l'll play the piano.
The piano's not my thing.
Can anyone sing here?
l don't think so.
Unless Rhadija...
l sing like a frog.
l know a song.
But it can also be spoken.
l learned it at boarding school. l said it to myself at night,
to give me courage.
Courage for what?
Courage for waiting.
l spent my time waiting. Waiting for everything in life:
waiting for vacation,
to see Antoine again.
Go on. We're listening.
Where is the friend l seek?
My longing rises with the sun.
Night fades, in vain l call his name.
l see his traces, l know he is there.
l feel him where the flowers sweeten the air.
Where saplings sprout, and wheat thrives.
He is the breeze that caresses me.
The scent for which l long.
l hear his voice blend into the summer's song.