A leader is steady, firm, decisive, unwavering. 一个领导者是坚定的、坚定的、果断的、坚定不移的.
Never let 'em see you sweat, always have an answer. 永远不要让他们看到你流汗，总是有答案。
[The Way We Work] [我们的工作方式]
My name is Dan, I'm a partner at a global creative consultancy. 我叫丹，是一家全球创意咨询公司的合伙人。
But there's another side to me: 但我还有另外一面：
Carrie Dragshaw, 凯莉·德劳肖，
the character I created on Instagram. 我在Instagram上创建的角色。
As I thought about my double life, I couldn't help but wonder ... 当我想到我的双重生活时，我不禁想知道.
When your true self is a little nontraditional, 当你真正的自我有点非传统的时候，
how much of it can you really bring to the office? 你真的能把多少钱带到办公室来？
For some of us is authenticity off-limits? 对我们中的一些人来说，真实性是不允许的吗？
For the first 10 years of my career, 在我职业生涯的前10年，
I thought there was one way to be a leader: 我以为有一种方法可以成为领导者：
decisive and serious. 果断而严肃。
But that's not me. 但那不是我。
So I'd put on basically office drag to fit the role: 所以我基本上会穿上办公室拖带来适应这个角色：
I'd talk in a deeper voice, try to hold in my hand motions. 我会用更深的声音说话，试着握住我的手。
I'm someone who gets really excited about things, 我是个对事情很兴奋的人，
so I'd temper that. 所以我很生气。
I had this little voice in my head, telling me, 我脑子里有个声音，告诉我，
"You're too gay, too feminine, too flamboyant." "你太同性恋了，太女性化了，太浮夸了。"
I had one well-intentioned adviser who said, 我有个好心的顾问说，
"Everyone knows you're gay. And that's great. "每个人都知道你是同性恋。太好了。
But you don't need to beat them over the head with it." 但你不需要用它打他们的头。"
Cut to: me in a tutu, for Halloween 2016. 抄近路：2016年万圣节，我穿着芭蕾舞短裙。
I dressed up as my favorite TV show character, Carrie Bradshaw, 我打扮成我最喜欢的电视节目角色，凯莉·布拉德肖，
thinking my friends would get a kick out of it. 以为我的朋友们会从中得到乐趣。
And then, things got crazy. 后来，事情变得疯狂了。
The post went viral, and at first it was pure fun. 这篇文章在网上疯传，一开始很有趣。
I started getting these incredible messages from people 我开始从人们那里得到这些难以置信的信息
about how happy it made them, 关于它让他们多么快乐，
how it encouraged them to be their authentic selves. 它如何鼓励他们成为真正的自己。
And I started to think, 我开始想，
maybe this is the time to tell that little voice in my head to just shut up 或许现在是时候让我脑子里的声音闭嘴
and let myself be me. 让我自己做我自己。
But then things got a little too big. 但后来事情变得太大了。
Carrie Dragshaw was everywhere -- In the "New York Post", "US Weekly" -- 嘉莉·德拉肖无处不在--在《纽约邮报》(New York Post)、《美国周刊》(American Weekly)上
and I got terrified: 我吓坏了：
"What would my bosses think? "我的老板会怎么想？"
Would my coworkers still respect me as a leader? 我的同事们还会尊重我的领导地位吗？
What would my clients think?" 我的客户会怎么想？"
I thought I was going to have to get a different job. 我想我得换个工作了。
But then, something happened, something small. 但后来发生了一些小事情。
I got a text from my boss, it wasn't long, it just said, 我收到老板的短信，没多久，就说，
"Wow, Cosmo!" "哇，科斯莫！"
With a link to an article that had just gone up about me. 上面有一篇关于我的文章的链接。
And it let me put that little, scared voice away 它让我把那个小小的，害怕的声音
and just be excited about this whole new world, 为这个全新的世界感到兴奋，
rather than freaked out. 而不是被吓坏了。
That's the power of one person, 这是一个人的力量，
sometimes all it takes is one ally to make you feel comfortable. 有时候你只需要一个盟友就能让你感觉舒服。
And my coworkers started acting differently. 我的同事们开始表现得不一样了。
They became more open, more playful with me, 它们变得更开放，对我更有趣，
it was as if knowing this other side of me 就好像知道我的另一面
gave them permission to be more of themselves as well. 也允许他们做更多的自己。
I thought that openness and vulnerability 我以为开放和脆弱
would actually decrease my standing with my team. 会降低我在团队中的地位。
But it's done the opposite. 但事实却恰恰相反。
Two years in, 两年后，
I never could have imagined that this part of me would not just be embraced, 我从没想过我的这一部分不只是被拥抱，
but could actually help my career. 但实际上可以帮助我的事业。
Now, I'm lucky. 现在，我很幸运。
I work in New York City, 我在纽约工作，
in an office where creativity is valued 在一个重视创造力的办公室里
and I was already pretty established in my career when all of this started. 当这一切开始的时候，我已经在我的职业生涯中站稳脚跟了。
Maybe that's you, maybe it isn't. 可能是你，也可能不是。
But all of this has taught me so much 但这一切都教会了我很多
about just the importance of bringing your whole self to work. 关于让自己全身心投入工作的重要性。
And it's really challenged my own misperceptions 它真的挑战了我自己的误解
about what it takes to be successful. 关于成功所需要的东西。
There's no one kind of way to be a leader. 没有一种方法可以成为领导者。
It's about finding your strengths and finding ways to amplify them. 关键是要找到你的优势并找到放大它们的方法。
Before, if a meeting was hard, I'd put on my perfect leader mask. 以前，如果会议很难，我会戴上完美的领导面具。
Now, I can say, "Gosh, that was frustrating." 现在，我可以说，"天啊，太令人沮丧了。"
We can talk about challenges and struggles in an open way, 我们可以开诚布公地谈论挑战和斗争，
rather than everybody pretending that they're fine until it's too late. 而不是每个人都假装他们很好直到为时已晚。
Concealing an identity takes work. 隐藏身份需要努力。
Think of all the wasted energy spent pretending, 想想那些浪费在假装上的精力，
wishing you were someone different. 希望你是另一个人。
What's most interesting to me, though, is that in this big study of covering, 不过，对我来说最有趣的是，在这个关于封面的大研究中，
93 percent of those who say they're doing it 93%的人说他们在做这件事
also believe their organization values inclusion. 也相信他们的组织重视包容。
So clearly, our workplaces and all of our strange inner voices 很明显，我们的工作场所和所有奇怪的内心声音
have a long way to go on acceptance. 我们还有很长的路要走。
There's a big difference between adapting and disguising. 适应和伪装之间有很大的区别。
And I think I learned that a little late. 我想我知道的有点晚了。
Personally, I'm taking all of this as a call to be the ally 就我个人而言，我把这一切都当作是对盟友的召唤
who, like my boss did for me, 像我老板为我做的那样，
lets people know that it's OK to open up. 让人们知道敞开心扉是可以的。
If you're gay, or proud of your ethnic background, 如果你是同性恋，或者为自己的种族背景感到自豪，
or have a disability or are deeply religious, 或者有残疾或者笃信宗教，
see what it's like being your full self at work. 看看在工作中做一个完整的自己是什么感觉。
You might be pleasantly surprised. 你可能会感到惊喜。