靠 大迟到了 Fuck, fuck, fuck! So late!
梅布尔给猫咪戴了围巾 Mabel's put a scarf on the cat
它不是猫咪 它是我老公 He's not a cat. He's my husband
他人呢 Where is he?
他会带大咪咪阿姨来吗 Will he bring the ladies with the big boobies?
"阿姨" "Ladies"?
上次他用叉子帮我梳头发 Last time, he brushed my hair with a fork
有三个阿姨在玩枕头大战 There were three ladies, and they had an epic pillow fight
叉子沾了枫糖浆 The fork had maple syrup on it
让开 亲爱的 Out of the way, darling
他不来了 我只好待在家里 it's obvious he's not coming, so I'll just stay home
你说 You said this was
今年只会为这件事出门 the one thing you had to leave the house for this year
没错 我要去 You're right. I'm going
让一让 梅布尔 Move, please, Mabes
靠...夏面包 Fuck...caccia
我们吃了面包吗 Did we eat the focaccia?
没有任何蔬菜 Well, we haven't got any vegetables
但幸运的是有冷冻青豆 妈妈 But lucky you, you get to have frozen peas. Mmm
好了 到餐桌来 All right. Come to the table
快点 Come on
一 二... One, two...
我数到三该做什么 What am I going to do when I get to three?
-请输入密码 -哦 靠 -Please enter alarm code. -Oh, fuck, oh, fuck, oh, fuck!
-请输入密码 -不 别灭火 -Please enter alarm code. -No! Don't put the flames out
可以烤棉花糖 We can toast marshmallows
请... Please...
我们身体之间的拉扯 The tension of our bodies
对那伤痕的 the scars of
哈啰 摩托 Hello, Moto
荡妇淫女来电
渴望 in...in our longing
布莉琪·琼斯 总是令人性奋 Bridget Jones, always exciting
你好吗 How's the skirt?
丹尼尔 嗨 Daniel, hi
你脑残到忘了今晚的事 Just checking you have indeed forgotten about tonight
太伤人了 琼斯 That is hurtful, Jones
我绝对没有忘记 I have absolutely not forgotten
抱歉 是我母亲 I'm so sorry. It's my mother
她在医院 She's in the hospital
原始汗水 Primordial sweat
我赶去的速度 I will be there quicker
比让你爽翻天更快 than it took me to bring you to earth-shattering orgasm
你这好色的小浪女 you filthy little harlot
爱你哦 老妈 Love you, Mummy
"老妈" "Mummy"?
亲爱的洁敏妮塔 Darling, clever Geminita
我得闪了 家里有急事 I'm gonna have to rush. It's a family emergency
但我超爱这首诗 But I am loving this one
大家都很爱 对吧 I think...I think we all are, aren't we?
再打给我 Call me later, yeah?
很好 Oh, yeah
我就快到了 琼斯 I am imminent, Jones. Imminent
稍安勿躁 Un-bunch those giant panties
应该抵制歧视女性的拉链厂商 Bloody zip manufacturers should be
靠自己根本就拉不了 It is actually impossible to do this on your own
帮帮忙 Help
谢了 亲爱的 Ooh. Thank you, monkeys
丹尼尔叔叔 Uncle Daniel!
迷你达西 怎么样啊 Miniature Darcy, what's the news?
那些大咪咪阿姨呢... Where are the ladies with the big...
是大方的阿姨啦 她们不能来 Hair? They couldn't make it, sadly
她们在洗头发 They're, um...They're washing their hair
三个都是 All three?
她们在互相洗头发 Yeah, well, they wash each other's, you see
你说不跟模特儿约会了 I thought you said no more models
洁敏妮塔不是模特儿 Geminita is not a model, Jones
她是诗人和治愈者 She is a poet and a healer
也是模特儿 and a model
过来 Come here
今晚会很难熬 Hell of a night for you
我不能去 孩子们需要我 Ugh, I can't go. The children need me
丹尼尔叔叔 Uncle Daniel!
你 好吧 You. Right
拿叉子和糖浆 我帮你做造型 Get a fork and some syrup. I'm gonna style you
我找到扑克牌 I found the cards
太好了 Very good. Excellent
你要练习诈唬 Now then, we need to work on your bluffing
和出老千 and your cheating
人生有喜悦的白键... Life has its white notes...
也有哀伤的黑键 And life has its black notes
你今晚很美 达西太太 You look very beautiful tonight, Mrs Darcy
你也很帅 达西先生 Not looking so bad yourself, Mr Darcy
布莉琪 Bridget
很哀伤的黑键 Very black notes
太好了 请进 Jolly good. Come in
天气有点糟 对吧 Weather's been a bit shitty, hasn't it?
-但今年的板球赛... -杰瑞米 -Though the cricket this year has been... -Jeremy
太精彩了 Absolutely phenomenal
事情是这样的 This is what happened
马克达西 我丈夫 Mark Darcy, my husband,
比利和梅布尔的爸爸 father to Billy and Mabel
死了 died
他在苏丹参加一项人道救援任务时遇害 Or rather, was killed in the Sudan on a humanitarian mission
大家都在楼上 Everybody's just upstairs
谢了 Thanks
其实就是四年前的今天 And that was four years ago. Today, actually
要有心理准备 这会超尬的 Brace yourself. It's a total fucking shit show
虽然可能有六十万个字 And even though there might be 600,000 words
在人类的语言里 in the human language
当你深爱的人离去 the world still struggles to find the right ones
还是难以用言语表达 when someone you love is gone
布莉琪 孩子们好吗 Bridget, how are the children?
你不在家 他们没事吧 Are they all right without you there?
没事啦 No. It's fine
我留了冰毒给他们 Left them some crystal meth in the kitchen
这玩笑开不得 Maybe not
我们不会纪念忌日 Well, we don't make a thing about it
我们会庆祝马克的生日 We celebrate Mark's birthday instead
所以 布莉琪 你还是单身 So, Bridget, still on your own?
他都已经死了四年 [Man] It's been four years now
你还很漂亮 怎么没交男友 You're still in pretty good nick. Why no chap?
这不是她的错 Now, now. It's not Bridget's fault
大龄单身女 Very hard, being a middle-aged woman
没啥市场 and finding yourself single
单身男比较吃香 Better if you're a bloke
看看宾可·卡鲁瑟 Look at Binko Carruthers
他不是大帅哥 He's no oil painting
但他老婆才刚死 就桃花朵朵开 but the second Rosemary died, he was inundated
但对象都是老姑婆 对吧 Of course, they were all of a certain age, though, weren't they?
抱歉哦 你听到自己说啥吗 Sorry, do you realise you said that out loud?
老姑婆 你是说我们 "A certain age"? What, do you mean our age?
夏莎有个播客节目《食之无味》 Shazzer now hosts a podcast called Fed Up
一边和小名人吃饭 in which she has dinner with minor celebrities
一边吐槽一切 while basically getting furious about everything
社会歧视女性 Sexist fucking universe we, unbelievably
我们却不得不继续忍受 still continue to fucking inhabit
抱歉
我得去厕所 I need to go to the toilet
真可怜 Oh, dear
对 裘德 我跟她在一起 Yeah, Jude. Yeah, I'm with her now
叫她来金雕酒馆 Well, Shaz, tell her to come to The Golden Cock
不行啦 这是纪念马克的派对 No, no, no. The party. It's for Mark
这不是派对 这是场灾难 That's not a party. That's a fucking bin fire
马克会要你 And you think that Mark would want you
留下来参加 to stay here and be insulted
性别批斗大会吗 in the fucking sexism Olympics?
敬马克 To Mark
也敬布莉琪... And to Bridget...
难得看到你 And the rare pleasure of seeing you
没穿睡衣或浴袍 in something not made of terry towelling
汤姆还在靠唯一的单曲吃香喝辣 Tom, still living handsomely off his one hit single
最近再度翻红 which had a comeback recently
因为一支狗狗短视频 in a 30-second video of a dog doing maths
而且 他现在是人生教练 Now, of all things, a life coach
老实说 你有进步 Honestly, I'd say it was a bit of a breakthrough
做为你的心理医生 speaking as your psychologist
你不是我的心理医生 [Laughs] You're not my psychologist
我应该是啊 Well, I should be, yes
根据经典模式 According to the classic model
你进入悲伤五阶段的 you've actually made it to the fourth stage
第四阶段 of the five stages of grief
不是七阶段吗 Wait. Isn't it seven stages?
别乱讲 裘德 是五阶段 What are you talking about, Jude? No, it isn't. It's five stages
-五阶段吧 -我以为是四阶段 -Isn't it five? -Well, I always thought it was four
绝对是七阶段 It's definitely seven
裘德是执行长或首席运营官 反正是什么长 Jude, now CEO or COO or CTO, definitely a C-something-O,
她还是常常哭着从专属厕所打给我 still regularly calling, in tears, from executive bathroom
你只剩下一个阶段了 So, um, only one stage to go now, Bridge
第五阶段 Stage five
接受 基本上代表 It's acceptance, which basically means
你只需要爱爱 you just have to get laid
天啊 夏莎说的对 Oh, my God. Shazzer's right
老实说 亲爱的 看看你 Yes. I mean, honestly, darling, look at yourself
你是重生的处女 You've become a born-again virgin
你再不赶快爱爱 阴道会重新封住 If you don't get laid soon, your vagina will literally reseal itself
对 是真的 Yeah, and that is a thing
那叫做阴唇粘合 It's called labial adhesion
我的天啊 Oh, my God!
我就知道不该离开厨房 I knew leaving the kitchen was a mistake
我不要男人 I don't want anyone else
就算我要 And even if I did, which I don't
我也完全失去性吸引力 I'm non-viable, completely asexual
没人会喜欢我 and nobody will ever fancy me again
-永远都不会 -不 -Ever, ever, ever. -No. No, no, no
我要去厕所 And I'm going to the toilet
-白忙一场 -真是一场灾难 -Crash and burn. -That was a disaster
天啊 我家被抢了 Crikey. Have we been burgled?
并没有 琼斯 We have not been burgled, Jones. No
我们玩得很嗨 We have been marvellous
告诉我 Now, tell me this
托尼娅应该穿猫跟鞋还是坡跟鞋 For Tonya, do we think a kitten heel or a chunky wedge?
她要去看温布顿网球赛 She's going to Wimbledon
当然是坡跟鞋 Wedge, obviously
你也许是对的 You may be right
约会咋样 好玩吗 有没亲亲啊 How was it? Any fun? Any tongue?
并没有 我封舌了 Ugh. God. No tongue. I have hung up my tongue
他们怎样 How were they?
你女儿像你 Well, the girl is you
淘气浪漫 无法抗拒我的魅力 Lawless, romantic, irresistibly drawn to me
问我会不会当她的新爸爸 Asked me if I was going to be her new daddy
她常常那么问 She does that
我答应娶她的兔兔才肯睡觉 Yeah. Wouldn't go to bed until I'd married her rabbit
我倒是很乐意 Which I was very happy to do
那只兔兔很性感 That rabbit is not at all unfanciable
比利呢 -他活像是达西 -Hmm. And Billy? -Well, Billy is Darcy, isn't he?
外冷内热 Still waters and all that
巧的是 琼斯 As it happens, Jones
你儿子和我有些相同兴趣 your son and I have a number of shared interests
天啊 像是什么 Oh, God. Like what?
模特儿 Models
我们互相分享 He showed me his, I showed him mine
然后讨论死亡 And then we...We talked about death
是吗 Did you?
对 我跟他说死了很惨 Yeah. I told him being dead was shit
我很清楚 我算是死过 And that I should know because I was for a bit
他好像有点难过 我就抱了他 And then, uh...I gave him a hug cause he seemed a bit sad
让我也很难过 因为... And then that made me sad because...
你儿子怎样 How is your boy?
恩佐几岁了... Enzo's, what? He's...
谁晓得 15岁吧 Uh, fuck knows, Jones. Fifteen, I think
反正我们为了开心起来 Anyway, we then cheered ourselves up
挖出雪克杯 by digging out the cocktail shaker
我教他做色妞调酒 and I taught him how to make a Dirty Bitch
放冰箱留给你喝 Saved it for you. It's in the fridge
好耶 我早餐再喝 Goody. Have it for breakfast
是 哈啰 Yeah, hello, hello, hello, hello
洁敏妮塔 Geminita
结束了 我这就过去 Yeah, we're all done. All done. I'm on my way
我会尽快 Well, as quick as I can
就像好色老头扑向年轻辣妹 Yes, like naughty old moth to eager young flame
不 你先挂 No, you hang up first
好 我也亲回去 And...OK, kiss you back
好 大声点 Yeah, OK. Louder. Yeah
哦天哪 Oh, my God
去你的 琼斯 Fuck off, Jones
他们都睡着了 OK, they're asleep
花了点时间 Um...it did take a bit of time
但我...给他们看洁敏妮塔 But I...Actually I showed them a video of Geminita
朗诵散文诗的视频 reciting one of her prose poems
马上就睡着 and they were out like a light
出版界花花公子没死
好吧 All right
现在要怎样 What happens now?
我在回想 我的保姆怎么做 I'm trying to remember how it worked with our babysitters
你要给我20英镑 再跟我爱爱 I think you give me 20 quid and try and shag me, don't you?
亲爱的丹尼尔 Ah, Daniel, dear Daniel
至少有些事情不会变 At least some things never change
老实说 我有点难过... It makes me sad though, Jones. You know...
你有两个小孩 根本就是个修女 Two children and you all alone and effectively a nun
超不正经的修女 Albeit, of course, a very, very naughty nun
拜 丹尼尔 Bye, Daniel
好吧 Yeah
今晚多谢了 Thanks for tonight
是啊 Yeah
国际象棋中级问题集
灯怎么还开着 Why are these lights still on?
我以为你们都睡了 I thought you two were asleep
你有时候会想念爸爸吗 Do you miss Dada sometimes?
我常常想念他 I miss him all of the times
我的猫头鹰 There's my owl
快回来睡觉吧 Back to bed. Come on
说个故事 妈妈 Story, Mama?
小小公主又漂亮又善良 For the baby princess is as kind as she is fair
小小王子又帅气又温和 And the baby prince is as gentle as he is handsome
不管他们去哪儿和做什么 And wherever they go and whatever they do
爸爸妈妈都会永远爱他们 Mummy and Daddy will always love them
还有口水兔兔 And Saliva
她很臭耶 梅布尔 She stinks, Mabes
-晚安 亲爱的 -晚安 妈妈 -Good night, darling. -Good night, Mama
晚安 Good night
所有的烦恼... And all the thoughts...
所有的烦恼都消失不见 And all the thoughts are going away
它们今晚不需要比利和梅布尔 They don't need little Billy and Mabel tonight
世界没有它们一样会转动 The world will turn without them
星星没有它们一样会闪烁 The stars will shine without them
比利和梅布尔只要好好休息和睡觉 And all little Billy and Mabel need to do is rest and sleep
晚安 Good night
晚安 Night
晚安 比利 Good night, Billy
唱那首歌 爸爸 拜托 Do the song, Daddy. Please
好吧 OK
我愿为你付出一切 亲爱的 在所不辞 I'll do anything For you, dear Anything
因为你就是我的全部 For you mean everything To me
账号 是我布莉琪73@GMAILCOM
独自一人47 All by myself 47
再试一次
搞啥 Shitballs
抱歉 密码不正确
不 该死的泡泡 No. Cock-bollocking fuck-bubbles!
抱歉 密码不正确
全国每个人 Literally everyone else in the whole country
都在笑我 is laughing uproariously with their partners
然后一边看奈飞一边爱爱 while watching Netflix and having sex
别一直沉浸在悲伤中 亲爱的 You don't want to wallow in it, darling
他们又在念我了 And there they are again
所有的声音 所有的建议 All the voices, all the advice
你要沉浸在悲伤中 You gotta wallow in it, Bridge. Wallow
悲伤 G-R-E-I-V-E Grieve. G-R-E-I-V-E
是I-E 不是E-I It's I-E. It's not E-I
I要放在E前面 除非在C后面 No, it's "I before E except after C"
一点都没错 Yes, exactly
天啊 你真是个"北西" God, you really are such a T-W-T-A
什么 A what?
建议 The thing about advice is
每次都没有人给你同样的 no one tells you the same thing twice
布莉琪 你得以孩子们为优先 Bridget, you've got to put the children first
嗯哼 Uh-huh
谢谢你 玛格妲 Thank you, Magda
以孩子们为优先 Put the children first
别管孩子们 Sod the children
先戴上你的氧气面罩 Put your own oxygen mask on first
对 氧气面罩 Right. Oxygen mask
收到 Got it
有件事是真的 One thing's for certain, Bridge
别想再做爱 Forget about sex. Oh
好吧 OK
不再做爱 No sex
你一定要多多做爱 You need to have a lot of sex
是啊 你何不回去工作 Yeah. Why don't you come back to work?
谢谢你 理查 我会考虑的 Thank you, Richard. I'll bear that in mind
但就像我爸挂掉前说的 最大的问题是... But as my dad said just before he died, the big question is...
你能生存下去吗 Can you survive?
我猜可以吧 I think so
我一定要 I have to
我也很努力 I'm trying
光是生存还不够 你要活出精彩 It's not enough to survive. You've got to live
达赖喇嘛说的吗 Is that the Dalai Lama?
好像是哈利史泰尔斯说的 It's Harry Styles, I think
-柯林 那是香肠吗 -什么香肠 -Colin. Is that a sausage? -What sausage?
布莉琪 医生说他不能吃饱和脂肪 Bridget, you know what the doctor said about saturated fats
潘 帮我和布莉琪拍张合照 Pam, could you take a photograph of us? Me and Bridget
柯林 别抬起下巴 Colin, try not to do that with your chin
我什么都没做 I'm not doing anything with my chin
答应我 你要活出精彩 Promise me you'll live, Bridget
笑一个 Smile!
日记
4月19日周一 马克忌日
"Modern Love"
月20日周二 4月21日周三
布莉琪·琼斯 该活出精彩了 Bridget Jones, it's time to live
我知道什么时候该走 I know when to go out
知道什么时候该留 Know when to stay in
把事情做好 Get things done
我捡起报童扔的报纸 I catch a paper boy
但事情并没改变 But things Don't really change
我站在风中 I'm standing in the wind
但我从未挥手道别 But I never wave bye-bye
但我拼命努力 努力 But I try
但我拼命努力 努力 I try
BJ单身日记4 恋上小鲜肉
我永远不会迷恋 Never gonna fall for
现代爱情 走在我身旁 Modern love. Walks beside me
现代爱情 继续走 Modern love. Walks on by
现代爱情 送我及时去到教堂 Modern love. Gets me to. The church on time
及时去到教堂 吓到我 Church on time. Terrifies me
及时去到教堂 让我开派对 Church on time. Makes me party
及时去到教堂 让我相信上帝和人 Church on time. Puts my trust in God and man
上帝和人 没有忏悔 God and man. No confession
上帝和人 没有宗教 God and man. No religion
上帝和人 不要相信现代爱情 God and man. Don't believe in modern love
它不是真实的 It's not really work
它只是蛊惑人心 It's just the power to charm
我还站在风中 I'm still standing in. The wind
但我从未挥手道别 But I never wave bye-bye
但我拼命努力 But I try
努力 I try
改编自海伦·菲尔丁小说
我永远不会迷恋 Never gonna fall for
现代爱情 走在我身旁 Modern love. Walks beside me
现代爱情 继续走 Modern love. Walks on by
现代爱情 送我及时去到教堂 Modern love. Gets me to the church. On time
现代爱情... Modern love...
铅笔盒 午餐 Right. You've got your pencil case
作业都带了吗 your lunch, your homework?
钥匙呢 Your keys?
你绝对带了竖笛 很好 you've definitely got your recorder so that's good
还有你画的太空船 Your lovely picture of a spaceship
那是一只猫 It's a cat
对哦 是耶 Oh, yes. Of course it is, darling
你用什么颜料 What paints did you use?
上面有两个C的口红 I used the lipsticks with the C's on them
-真有创意 -你的包包 -Oh. So creative. -Handbag?
又忘了 Oh, fuck a duck
哈啰 比利 Hello, Billy
早上好 Morning
哈啰 梅布尔 Hello, Mabel
早上好 布莉琪 Morning, Bridget
嗨 Hi
你还是老样子 Just the usual crap
你会是我的新爸爸吗 Are you going to be my new daddy?
-不 妈 -不 妈 -No, Mum! -No! Mum!
我生孩子的时候 When I signed up for having children
可没答应要生出 I did not sign up to be ruled
一群电脑儿童 by a gaggle of computer crackheads
猜怎么样 Well, guess what?
我生了你们 也养了你们 I've had you, I've brought you up
现在改变主意了 and I've changed my mind!
不 No!
不不不 No, no, no!
你们敢碰就逼你们参加《鱿鱼游戏》 Don't you touch those or I'll fucking enter you in Squid Game
走吧 Here, darling
-来吧 -妈 -Come, come. -Mum!
我们怎么都不跟他们问好 Why don't we ever say hello?
这是人生最重要的一课 Oh. Important life lesson, darling
千万别见到你的偶像 Never meet your heroes
从今天开始 不会再让厨房起火 Starting today, will not set things on fire
会重设密码 will responsibly reset passwords
不再包括"混蛋"这种字眼 not to include the word "fuckwit"
也不会再害怕学校的其他妈妈... and will not be frightened of the school mums...
嗨 Hi
尤其是完美妮可莉特... In particular, Perfect Nicolette...
和她完美的双胞胎 with her perfect twins
快开走 校门口不准停车 Move the car! There's no parking in front of the school
-你好吗 -什么 -How are you? -What?
我...以为你在洛杉矶 I...I thought you were in LA
是啊 Right
沃勒克先生 Mr Walliker?
艾洛斯说 Mr Walliker, Eros tells me
他没被选上合唱团 he hasn't been selected for the choir for some reason
-没错 -为什么 -Correct. -Well, how can that be?
因为他不会唱歌 还有事吗 索尔坦尼-沃特金斯夫人 Because he can't sing. Anything else, Mrs Soltani-Watkins?
沃勒克先生 如果你看不出 Mr Walliker, if you have failed to recognise
艾洛斯这么明显的才华 Eros's obvious talents
那不是他的错 that's hardly his fault
事情很简单 It's really quite simple
加入合唱团就像大自然的一切全凭实力 The choir, like everything else in nature, is chosen on merit
这是物竞天择 Yeah, natural selection
他只要努力练唱 If Eros wants to put in the work
就能再去试唱 he's welcome to audition again
失陪了 If you'll excuse me
自行车 不准在那儿骑 Bike! Not there. Not there
那是谁啊 Who's that?
新来的自然老师 沃勒克先生 Oh. New science teacher. Mr Walliker
马上成为我的偶像 Instant hero
真是没礼貌 Unbelievably rude
糟透了 He's awful
请开走 马上 Move along, please. Right away!
你们两个 这儿不是公园 You two! This isn't a stroll on the heath
看到我放折叠椅 You don't see me unfolding deck chairs
和吃三明治吗 and unwrapping sandwiches, do you?
快进去 合唱团要开始练唱了 Move it inside! It's choir in eight minutes
沃勒克先生 你好 Mr Walliker. Hello
我们没见过面 I don't believe we've met
我是比利·达西的妈妈 I'm Billy Darcy's mum
就快要耳鸣的小男生 The boy about to be diagnosed with tinnitus
哨子很重要 达西太太 The whistle is an essential tool, Mrs Darcy
是吗 形容得真好 Mmm. An essential tool? What an apt description
艾洛斯 艾特克斯 Eros! Atticus!
如果你们迟到会后悔一辈子 If you're late, you will regret it for the rest of your days
对不起 老师 Sorry, sir!
不准 No!
她晚点儿会回来 She'll be back later
我要带她去看医生 We have a doctor's appointment
我身上长虫 I've got worms!
你奶奶为什么穿着睡衣 Why is your granny wearing pyjamas?
真是够糗 That went well
G-O-N-O" ...
淋病 事实与迷思
念得真好 亲爱的 That's lovely, darling
-"R-H"... -拿去 -"R-H"... -There you go
全家每天都要吃一颗 One tablet a day for the entire family
如果她还痒 就把猫弄走 and if her itching doesn't stop, I suggest you get rid of that cat
你找到保姆了吗 Have you got some help yet?
别看我这样 但我能搞定 I know it doesn't look it, but really, I've got it all in hand
你搞不定 No, it doesn't look it
我是妇产科医生 Apart from anything else, I'm a gynaecologist
不是小儿科医生 not a paediatrician
虽然我很乐意帮忙 但你知道 And whilst I'm happy to step in, you do take my point
你再叫我戴氧气面罩 If you say "oxygen mask" to me again
我就用这个手提包砸你 I will hit you with this handbag
我才不怕呢 I am not afraid of handbags
你得找别的事情做 You need something else to do
别再成天穿这种睡衣 You need a reason to get out of those pyjamas
你一向都不会打扮 Well, fashion's never really been your thing
没礼貌 -睡衣在米兰很潮 -Rude. -Pyjamas are all the rage in Milan
布莉琪 虽然没人看得出来 Bridget, in spite of all objective evidence to the contrary
但你既聪明又有才华 you are a bright, talented, brilliant woman
这是我给你的专业建议 And my professional advice to you is this
-你需要... -不不不 -You need... -No. No, no, no
别说我需要找人做爱 Please don't tell me to go and have sex
天啊 恶耶 Oh, good Lord, no
不是啦 No
去看本书 清理厨房抽屉 Read a book. Clean out the kitchen drawers
别一直想那档事 Leave the pink bits well enough alone
顺其自然就好 You'll be ready when you're ready
我给你的专业建议是 No, my professional advice to you is this
回去工作 go back to work
你的感情生活如何 And how's your love life?
热情如火 On fire
"Sy-P-Lis"...
梅毒 梅布尔 是梅毒 Syphilis. Mabel, Syphilis
梅毒 Syphilis
非常好 Mmm. Very good. Very good
我们也有美味的素食选项 And there's some delicious vegetarian alternatives here too
水灾 火灾和饥荒 Floods, fires and famine
当世界即将发生气候灾难 As the world teeters on the edge of climate catastrophe,
今天要谈的不只是美食 sausages aren't the only thing we are grilling today
广告过后环境大臣莎拉吉文斯将接受访问 Environment Secretary Sarah Givens joins us after the break
嗨 Hi
谢天谢地你接了电话 Oh, thank God you picked up
怎么了 What's the matter?
我要采访环境大臣 They've got the bloody Environment Secretary
45秒后 on in 45 seconds
他们要我问她 and they've got me asking her
茶包问题 questions about bloody tea bags
"回收茶包最好的方法是什么" "What's the best way to recycle tea bags?"
"能不能清洗表面"... "Can you clean surfaces with tea"...
布莉琪 我需要你 I need you, Bridget!
好吧... OK. Uh...
问她... Ask her...
怎么回事 What's the matter?
问她为什么在上周的预算案 Ask her why there were no tax breaks for renewable energy
-再生能源不能减税 -太好了 -in last week's budget. -Brilliant
她会用财务限制的鬼话敷衍你 She'll fob you off with some crap about economic constraints
你就反驳说 and then you nail her
石油和天然气公司只想赚钱 on oil and gas companies ring-fencing their profits
真是高招 Yes, I do
她会招架不住 She'll flap!
然后再抨击她 And then you nuke her arse
用政府支持水力压裂 on the government's support for fracking
我爱你 布莉琪·琼斯 I fracking love you, Bridget Jones
-嗨 布莉琪 -好耶 -Hi, Bridge. -Yes!
不过也要问茶包的事 Do try to find out about the tea bags though
-爱你 拜 -爱你 拜 -Love you. Bye. Bye. -Love you. Bye!
欢迎继续收看《女人秀》
欢迎继续收看 Welcome back
下一位来宾是环境大臣莎拉·吉文斯 Our next guest is Environment Secretary Sarah Givens
莎拉 预算 减税 水力压裂 Sarah, budget, tax breaks, fracking
说清楚讲明白 Justify
别顾左右而言他 And no fob-off!
请帮我转接理查·芬奇办公室 Could you please put me through to Richard Finch's office?
我叫布莉琪·琼斯 My name's Bridget Jones
我会等 谢谢 Yeah. I'll hold. Thanks
内容授权
比利 我要看《海绵宝宝》 Billy, I want to watch SpongeBob
比利 你已经玩够了哦 Billy, come off that, please. You've had your screen time
一 二... One, two...
可是今天是星期天 But, Mummy, it's Sunday
不行 No
我能看《海绵宝宝》吗 Can I watch SpongeBob?
我可以看《海绵宝宝》吗 May I watch SpongeBob
可以啊 Yes?
你得用"可以"不是"能" No, you've got to say "may I", not "can I"
我可以看《海绵宝宝》吗 May I watch SpongeBob?
-不可以 -可是妈妈 -No. -But, Mummy!
不不不 No, no, no, no
你们都不准看屏幕 No more screens, either of you
那会缩短注意力... Screens have been proven to shorten attention spans and...
不行 No
跟我去花园练习板球 Will you come and practise cricket with me in the garden?
妈妈得工作 亲爱的 Mummy really needs to work, darling
为什么不跟梅布尔一起玩 Why don't you play with Mabel?
她不肯打球 她说球球很可怜 She refuses to hit the ball. She says she feels sorry for Ball-y
球球 Ball-y
亲爱的 去跟比利打板球 Darling, please go and play cricket with Billy
我不可以 I may not!
这样都不行吗 Is it too much
我只想要自己清静个 to ask to get some bloody peace all by my bloody self
五分钟 for five bloody minutes?
网络断了 Internet's down!
我要看《海绵宝宝》 轮到我看了 I want to watch SpongeBob. Tell Billy it's my turn
-妈妈 -我现在不想当妈妈 -Mummy! -I don't want to be a mummy right now
你一直在看 You had it for ages!
今天就没有 I didn't even have it today
轮到我了 It's my turn!
没有网络 There's no Internet!
我只想坐下来 I just want to sit down
好好享受片刻的安静 一个人 in echoing silence on my own for one moment
-妈妈 -闭嘴 -Mummy! Mummy! -Just shut up!
米兰达 Miranda?
你还好吧 All right, Bridge?
你跑来干嘛 What're you doing here?
我本来在苏荷俱乐部看报纸 So I was reading the newspaper in Soho House
那儿真的超安静 你知道吗 and it was so, so quiet, you know?
我很想念这一切 I just miss all this
过期的牛奶 吵闹的小孩 混乱的生活 Off milk, stuff, clutter, children, life
这儿多的是 Plenty of that here
你没有香槟 You don't have any champagne
良心建议 Top tip
永远要在冰箱放一瓶冰镇香槟 always keep a cold bottle of champagne in the fridge
超赞的建议 That's excellent advice
我得老实说 Cards on the table
我在考虑解冻我的卵子 I'm thinking of unfreezing my eggs
很显然大家都跑去丹麦找精子 Apparently, everyone is going to Denmark to get sperm
-哦 -是啊 -Oh. -Yeah
我想要你拥有的这一切 But I want what you have. All of this
但苏荷俱乐部 周日报纸 But Soho House and...and Sunday papers
和冰镇香槟... and cold champagne...
你自由了 You're free, Bridge
你从约会压力中解放了 You're liberated from the tyranny of this
你知道我用多少交友软件吗 Do you know how many dating apps I use?
你能装性感吗 Could you look sexy?
只要给我点时间打扮就能装得很性感 Well, I meanI might still brush up OK given enough time
我是说这张照片 No, I mean for this photo
我帮你注册了Tinder I've set you up on Tinder
-什么 -不客气 -What? -You're welcome
不不不 Oh, no, no, no, no, no
我说你是寡妇 Well, I've popped you down as a widow
比较浪漫和特别 It's so much more romantic and singular
大家都同意 这是你需要的 We all agree it's what you need
Tinder是什么 What's Tinder?
今天天气真好 It's...Such a lovely day
谁想去公园 Who wants to, um, go to the heath?
-我不想去 -我要看《海绵宝宝》 -No, I don't wanna go! -No, SpongeBob!
好吧 没问题 Oh, OK. That's no problem
好哦 Uh, sure
你们待在家 我要 Um, you stay here, and I'll just
带这些巧克力去 uh, take these chocolate buttons. Ooh!
走吧 疯子 Let's go, nutters!
等不及了 Can't wait!
小孩 新鲜空气和白巧克力 Children and fresh air and white chocolate buttons
我好像是仙女保姆 I feel like Julie Andrews!
我有了配对 Oh! I just got matched with someone
梅布尔 下来 Sorry, Mabel, could you just get off
我的背快断了 actually, cause you're killing my back
他就在街角...厢型车里面 Uh, he's on a street corner...In a van
配对成功
他很像杰森·史塔森... He looks like Jason Statham...
只要眯着眼看 If you squint
改天见 In a bit, Bridge
拜 孩子们 Bye, kids. See you
-拜 -拜 -Bye! -Bye
一切都会安静下来 Oh, how everything calms down
只要到了郊外 once you're outside in blue skies
孩子们也乖得像狐猴一样 turning the children into biddable lemurs
我就会立马删掉Tinder Will obviously delete Tinder immediately
也许先快快看一眼 But perhaps a very quick look first
悲情寡妇寻找性欲觉醒
基斯对你点赞
基斯 Keith?
基斯 你是哪位 Who are you, Keith?
突然觉得进入 Feel suddenly exposed to
一个全新世界 whole new world hiding in plain sight
就像衣橱后面的纳尼亚 like Narnia through back of wardrobe
只不过狮子和女巫正在做爱 but with lion and witch shagging
妈妈 梅布尔卡在树上了 Mummy! Mabel's stuck up the tree!
-她是怎么爬上去的 -妈妈 -How'd she get up there? -Mummy!
来了 Coming!
好吧 Okay
放心 没事的 No, it's...it's all right
-我也下不去 -没事 我来了 -I can't get down either. -It's all right. I'm here
比利 是你吗 Billy. Is that you?
惨了 是沃勒克先生 Oh, no. It's Mr Walliker
没事吧 达西太太 Everything all right, Mrs Darcy?
没事 好得很 Yep. Super
只是在爬树 Just climbing a tree
看得出来 I can see that
玩得开心吗 Having fun?
当然咯 超好玩的 Yes. Yeah, this is really fun
-确定不用帮忙 -不用 -You sure you don't need a hand? -No, no
爱因斯坦说过 上去就会下来 As Einstein said "What goes up must come down"
-牛顿说的 -对啦 -Newton. -Yes
牛顿 Newton
我们要完蛋了 We're going to die!
不会啦 我们玩得很嗨 No, we're not going to die. We're having fun
我们肯定会完蛋的 We are definitely going to die
你很明显能搞定一切 Clearly you've got this nicely in hand
看啊 有个警察 Look, there's a policeman
哦 天哪 Oh, my God
我爬上了一个小帅哥的大树 I've climbed a magical man tree
-你卡住了 -对 -Are you stuck? -Yes!
没啦 No
-他们需要帮忙吗 -看来不需要 -Do they need help? -Apparently not
那我...就先走了 So, I'll...I'll be off then
拜拜 Bye-bye
好吧 我也要走了 Okay. I'll be off too
别走 Don't go away
真的 别走 No, seriously. Don't go away
坚持住 我来了 Hang on. I'm coming
我要上去了 Okay. Coming up
哈啰 Hello
好吧...等等 Okay, just...Hang on
哈啰 Hello
嗨 亲爱的 Hi, mate
-你叫什么名字 -梅布尔 -Hi, what's your name? -Mabel
-梅布尔 -我跳不下去 -Mabel. -I can't jump down
好 你先坐在这儿 Okay. Well, you sit down there
坐稳了 You get comfy
我要下去接住你 and I'm gonna go down there and catch you, OK?
-好了吗 -好了 -Okay, you ready? -Yeah
三 二 一 跳 Three, two, one, go!
-我做到了 -接住你了 -I did it! -I've got you. Well done
大家伙 换你了 All right, big man. Your turn
你行的 来吧 Okay. You got this, mate. There we go
-另一只脚 -很好 -Next foot. -That's it, darling
我抱住你了 And I've got you
好了 妈妈 Okay, Mum
好吧 Okay
来吧 There we go
-好吧 -好了 -Okay. -Okay
-没事吧 -没事 -You all right? -Yes
太好了 Yes
好吧 Okay
谢谢你 Thank you
谢谢 Thank you
不客气 It's all right
我是罗克斯比 你可以叫我罗克斯特 Uh, I'm Roxby. But you can call me Roxster
我是布莉琪·琼斯 Bridget Jones
但你可以叫她妈妈 But you can call her Mummy
好哦 Hmm. Okay
悲情寡妇寻找性欲觉醒
这应该是你的 I think this is yours
谢了 Thanks
我还能帮什么忙 Anything else I can help with?
天啊 好啊 God, yes
不用了 No
好吧 Okay
很高兴认识你 罗克斯 It's nice to meet you, Roxy
罗克斯特 It's Roxster
彼此彼此 布莉琪·琼斯 You too, Bridget Jones
我迷上了爬树的男神 Now obsessed with tree-rescuing Adonis
重新踏入情场 同时也回归职场 and reentering world of flirting simultaneously with workforce
达西太太 Mrs Darcy
沃勒克先生 Mr Walliker
武器都准备好了 Weapon at the ready, I see
很高兴看到你爬下那棵树 Good to see you managed to extricate yourself from that tree
是啊 孩子们最爱爬树了 Oh, yes. It's the children's favourite game
我们全家都很喜爱户外活动 We're completely obsessed with the outdoors in our house
我得让你们参加 Well, I'll have to put you down
下学期的野外旅行 for our Outward Bound trip next term
你一定会喜欢 Sounds like it'd be right up your street
真是见鬼 Fucking fuck
是啊 好哦 Yeah. Good
我的史莱姆呢 我要给卡斯玛塔看 Do you have my slime? I promised I'd show Cosmata
淋病 梅毒
那些是我的 Hey, those are mine
还给我 Give them to me
这些真的是她的 They are actually hers
这样的话... Well, in that case...
布莉琪 你穿得好正式 Bridget! You're dressed properly
真奇怪 Odd
我要去开会 Heading to a meeting
正在考虑回去工作 Thinking about going back to my old job
工作哦 Oh, a job
我把你排进工作日名单 Oh, I'll put you down for Jobs Day then
真绝了超操蛋 Fucking fuckety fuck fuck
好哦 没问题 Yes, absolutely
谢谢你 你真好 Celestine, merci. C'est gentil
麻烦弄整齐一点 Actually, do you mind tidying this up a little bit?
好啊 Sure
孩子们呢 有保姆吗 Uh, what about the children? Do you have a nanny?
还没有 Not yet
我有个完美人选 Oh, I've got the perfect person
她真的很棒 She's excellent
而且很漂亮 She's very pretty
但不必担心 布莉琪 but that doesn't matter, Bridget
你没有老公 because you don't have a husband
她多漂亮和多完美都无所谓 so it's absolutely immaterial how pretty and perfect she is
听起来不错 Sounds good
好了 There we go
-法兰西丝卡 -抱歉 -Francesca. -Sorry
好美啊 Wonderful
没啦 只是随便弄的 It's nothing. I just threw it together
布莉琪 你要捐什么 Bridget? Your donation?
你没忘记吧 You didn't forget?
没有 No
当然没有 Certainly not
我看看 Uh, let's see
有了 Here we are
鹰嘴豆泥 Hummus
还有... And, uh...
米饼 Rice cakes
看啊 已经打开了 And look, they've even been opened already
真好 Lovely
她叫克洛伊 六点半会到 Ah. Her name's Chloe, and she'll be with you at 6:30
蕾芙 印蒂亚 进去 别再聊天 Raef! India! Get inside. That's enough chatting
布莉琪·琼斯 Bridget Jones
谢谢 Thank you
四 Four
四楼 Four
-三 -三楼 -Three. -Three
谢谢 Thank you
布莉琪·琼斯即将 This is Bridget Jones about to go into
和真人面对面开会 an actual in-person meeting
女人秀
布兰达·琼斯 Brenda Jones?
其实是... Oh, actually, it's...
布莉琪·琼斯 你来了 快跟我来 Bridget Jones, there you are. Excellent. Quick, come with me
谢谢你 丽兹 Thank you, Lizzie
谢了 Thanks
很高兴见到你 你好吗 Good to see ya. How have you been?
你看起来很火热 You look hot
多谢夸奖 理查 Oh. Thank you, Richard
不过这种称赞有点过时 But I think you'll find that sort of language is a little outmoded
尤其是在职场 in the workplace
我是说热潮 No, I mean flustered
你是不是到了更年... Are you going through the, uh, you know?
布莉琪 让我向你介绍泰莉莎 Bridget, let me introduce you to Talitha
理查 我该拿这怎么办 Richard, what am I supposed to do with this, huh?
它会爬吗 单脚站立 Does it climb? Does it stand on one leg?
翻跟斗 这是乌龟 啥都不会 Does it do cartwheels? It's a tortoise. It doesn't do anything
他不能取消 他以为自己是谁 [Producer] He can't pull out. Who the fuck does he think he is?
自以为是的自大狂 Arrogant, self-important prick
叫那个自私鬼去死吧 Tell that selfish arsehole he can rot in hell
达赖喇嘛取消了 The Dalai Lama's cancelled
靠 该死 Twat. Shit
好吧 一小时后就要直播 Okay, we've got an hour till we're on air
我打电话找人替补 We need a replacement. Let me make a call
我跟菲姬一起学防身术 I do Krav Maga with Fergie
公爵夫人或黑眼豆豆主唱 Duchess or Black Eyed Pea?
公爵夫人 45分钟就能赶到 Duchess. She could be here in 45
这是布莉琪·琼斯 最优秀的制作人 Talitha, meet Bridget Jones. Best producer we've ever had
我相信你也很厉害 I'm sure you're very good too
我是大粉丝 Huge fan
拿着 Hold this
非常喜欢你在车臣的专题报道 Loved your early work from Chechnya
现在我要报道失禁乌龟 Now I'm doing features on incontinent tortoises
菲姬 Fergie
肌肉练得怎样 Are those glutes burning up?
哈啰 Hello
-抱歉 -没关系 -Hey. Sorry. -Right
把这座布景弄走 快点 Uh, right. Let's get rid of this set, please, now!
你觉得怎样 So, what do you think?
你肯回来吗 Can we lure you back?
菲姬答应了 Fergie's in
谁知道怎么洗掉乌龟尿 Does anyone know how to get tortoise piss out of silk?
吸干后用温和清洁剂 Blotting and mild detergent
几时可以开始 When can I start?
重新成为伦敦上班族 Am rejoining ranks of London's employed
为社会做出贡献 and meaningfully contributing to society
可以抬头挺胸 Can walk with head held high
成为比利和梅布尔的榜样 and be role model for Billy and Mabel
拯救他们免于 saving them from otherwise
沦为国家监护的酒鬼 certain future as alcoholic wards of the state
你回电视台工作真是太好了 It's super that the television's invited you back
你小时候 我都待在家照顾你 Of course, I always stayed at home when you were little
老妈很爱念我 Classic Mum
我没空闲聊 妈 Can't really talk, Mum
保姆来之前得打扫一下 I've got to tidy up before the nanny gets here
保姆 真的 A nanny? Really?
妈妈不爱我们了 Mummy doesn't love us anymore. Ow!
自从妈和尤娜搬进奥斯里之家 Ever since Mum and Una moved into Audsley House
我们假装是饭店的养老院 the retirement home we have to pretend is a hotel
她总是打电话问同一件事 the phone calls have been the same
找到男人了吗 布莉琪 Any men on the horizon, Bridget?
一定有好对象 Well, there's got to be someone
有些人不介意对象是寡妇 Some people don't mind a widow
有点伤人 Stings a bit
你不能挑三拣四 布莉琪 Beggars can't be choosers, Bridget
我们正在饭店厨房 And now, look, we're in the hotel kitchen
用真空机煮鲑鱼 doing salmon in the sous vide
其实就是水煮鱼 I mean, it's basically boil-in-the-bag
但现在很流行 but everybody's doing it these days
罗克斯特
罗克斯特 绝对有搞头 Roxster. Definite development
我得挂了 拜 妈 Oh, must go. Bye, Mum!
拜拜 Bye, bye
天啊 她来了 Oh, God, it's her
嗨 我是克洛伊 Hi, I'm Chloe
哈啰 Hello
到底是什么鬼东西 What the actual fuck?
她活像个电影明星 She looks like a film star
克洛伊 这是梅布尔 Chloe, this is Mabel
你看 我能用鼻子吹竖笛 Look, I can play the recorder with my nose
孩子们 这是克洛伊 Children, this is Chloe
她来帮忙照顾你们 She's going to come and help with everything
妮可莉特说会很可怕 Nicolette mentioned it would be a challenge
但我见过更糟的 but I've certainly seen worse
这是比利 科学天才 Oh, and this is Billy, the science genius
别给孩子贴标签 他们会有压力 Ooh, we mustn't pigeonhole children. It adds undue pressure
你读过《如何培育自驱型孩子》吗 Have you read How To Raise a Self-Driven Child?
我打算读 所以千万别剧透 Oh, yes. It's...It's on my list, so do not spoil the ending
别担心 比利 Oh, not to worry, Billy
重点不是成绩 而是学习过程 It's not about the result. It's about the journey
拿到A或C都能学到东西 There's something to learn whether you get an A or a C
比利从来没有拿过C... Billy has never had a C in...
这是谁打的分数 Who did this?
沃勒克先生 Mr Walliker
C 不正确
我画了地球和大气层 I drew the earth and the atmosphere
还在上面画了天堂 and I put heaven over the top
沃勒克老师说天堂是宗教思想 And Mr Walliker said that heaven was a religious construct
所以给我打了C And he gave me a C
沃勒克老师是爱吹哨子的独裁者 Well, Mr Walliker is a whistle-obsessed fascist
就像不粘锅没有灵魂 with all the soul of a non-stick wok
你把巧克力消化饼干藏在哪儿 Where did you hide the chocolate digestives?
我没有藏... I didn't hide...
任何东西 anything
有好多事要做 Well, plenty to do here
"Worth It"
If my body was a boat. Could you steer that, sailor?
Make it feel. Like it's a 1960s Hollywood trailer...
超完美保姆让我超内疚 Consumed with guilt re hideously perfect nanny
孩子们一定会比较爱她 who children will obviously come to love more
而不是邋遢的老妈 than hopeless mother without film star hair
Ooh, it's what I need. Yes, 'cause
I could love you
我很久没遇到会爬树的女人
If I really wanted to
搜索布莉琪·琼斯 你是电视制作人
You could be. Be my glass of wine
不是19岁的澳大利亚游泳冠军吧
When the sun set. Help me exhale all the excess
你会喜欢哪一个
Baby, bae, b-b-bae B-b-baby, would you
Would you make it all right?
Or maybe that much better?
If you wanted. You could make it
我觉得游泳不算嗜好
而是求生技能 你觉得呢
All worth it, worth it. Worth it, worth it
Ooh, when I see the sun rising. You make it that much better
网聊超难 给我手机号码
树木修剪与树干保养
So I hope you're gonna make it. All worth it, worth it...
我每天都会跟罗克斯特互发信息 And texting Roxster slowly became part of my life
这种关系不一定要真的见面 A relationship with no necessity for actually meeting
约会 爱爱或是认真交往 or arrangements, or sex, or any real life at all
换句话说 这是完美的关系 In other words, the perfect relationship
那是爬树男神吗 Is that the tree Adonis?
等一下 Wait a minute
你问他 喜欢用Tinder吗 You wrote to him "How are you liking Tinder?"
太乖了 有点无趣 Inoffensive, neutral, a bit dull
他回你 "不知道 " He replied "Don't know
"为了找到你才会用" only joined it to find you, Bridget Jones"
立马上他 Shag him now
他传了微笑表情符号 Then he sent a smiley emoji
你回传了希腊国旗 and then you responded with the flag of Greece
一个算盘和一只鸭子 an abacus and a duck
我慌了吗 I panicked
下一位 Who's next?
你要喝饮料吗 Do you want to go for a drink?
我真是受宠若惊 I'm so flattered
但我有男友了 Um, but I've got a boyfriend
我猜算是有男友吧 Well, sort of got a boyfriend. I think
你人真好 Um, so nice of you to ask
但...不了 谢谢 but, um...No, thank you
不是啦 这是套餐优惠 No, it's part of the meal deal
每次消费即赠免费饮料
这周日...我们见个面 Well, this one's easy
你一定要去 想都不用想 You absolutely must go. Obviously
但我们网聊了这么久 But we've been texting for so long now
我不能见他啦 I can't meet him
也许就像简·奥斯汀的的时代 I mean, maybe it's like in Jane Austen's day
他们写了好几个月的信 when they did letter writing for months and months
然后突然就结婚了 and then suddenly just got married
布莉琪 Bridget
刚认识他就传暧昧信息 sexting a man that you just met in a park
跟简·奥斯汀的时代完全不同 is nothing like Jane Austen's day
你不上他 我就会哦 If you don't shag him, I will
不行啦 I can't
不可能和男人赤裸相对 There is no possibility of being naked with a man
我这年纪 at this point in my life
你只需要重新建立形象 You just need a little rebrand
先买一件细肩带洋装 You'll start by getting a slip
细肩带洋装 A slip?
只要穿上就能展示出 Yeah, with a slip, you can show off
你的手臂 大腿和事业线 your arms, your legs, your décolletage,
趁还没下垂之前 which are always the last to go
而且要尽量遮住 And keep the central area
中间的金枪鱼肚 which one might want to gloss over, glossed over
顺便做巴西式除毛 And get a Brazilian
不要吧 God, no
我喜欢下面有草丛 I like a bit of coverage down there
至少要梳一梳 Or run a comb through it at least
但最好要去除毛 But also, do get a Brazilian
记得要除灰尘 Just dust it. Dust it down
好啦 我去除毛 Okay, I'll go!
但我不会跟他上床 But I'm not going to sleep with him
超薄型 经典装
保险套应该有颜色吗 Are condoms meant to be coloured?
真触感型好吗 Is hypersensitive good?
大号小号 Large? Small? Oh
也许应该买不同的款式 Maybe just purchase a representative selection
经典款 Regular
异国口味 Mmm, exotic flavours
超薄型 Thin feel
特大号 Extra-large
激潮款 Pleasure Me
润滑型 Lube
又一盒激潮款 Pleasure Me again
好好享受周末 达西太太 Enjoy your weekend, Mrs Darcy
哈啰 老朋友 Hello, old friend
今晚谢谢你 Thanks for having the kids tonight
我很乐意 Always a pleasure, never a chore
我早上会送他们上学 I'll take them to school in the morning
所以你想待到多晚都行 So you can stay out as late as you want
弥补这四年没做爱的日子 Make up for four years of no shagging
只是去喝一杯 It's only a drink
太透视了吗 Too see-through?
当然咯 Definitely
好吧 OK
这件呢 How about this?
好吧 OK
现实突然变得好可怕 The reality suddenly completely terrifying
我又胖又松垮 and Mark, and insane and flabby
哦 天啊 And oh, God, oh, God
我不行 I can't
-我真的不行 -怎么了 -I really can't. -Oh. What? What?
你行的 Aw. Hey, you can
你只要把它想成拓展交友圈就好 You just need to think of it as widening your circle of friends
就只是这样 That's all
来吧 Come on
穿上洋装 快出门吧 Put on the dress, get out of here
拓展你的交友圈 and widen your fucking circle
天啊 看看他 Oh, God. Look at him
要是他超完美呢 What if he's perfect?
哈啰 Hello
嗨 Hi
这附近有家非常棒的 There's a really great place around here
老餐厅 that's been here for forever
你对这儿熟吗 Do you know this area at all?
以前很熟 Mmm, I used to
公园管理员只是白天的工作 Yeah, the, uh, Heath Ranger thing is just a day job
我真正的热爱是垃圾 And my real passion is garbage
真的 Really?
专业术语是垃圾学家 The technical term is garbologist
我想当生化学家 正在上学 I'm a biochemist. Studying to be one
你是个学生 You're a student
比别的学生晚了很多 A late-in-life one, anyway. Yeah
你几岁 How late?
我28岁 I'm 28
我只是开玩笑 I'm just kidding
我29岁了 I'm 29
靠 Fuck
他的年纪比较接近我还是比利 Is he closer in age to me or to Billy?
你呢 What about you?
你的年纪... You are...
稍微大一点 Slightly older
我猜是35岁左右 I'm gonna say 35-ish
对 Yes
猜对了 Bull's-eye
就说是35岁 Let's say 35
那就是35岁咯 -Mmm. Thirty-five it is. -Mm-hmm
35岁OK吗 Is 35 all right?
我觉得年纪大的女人 I think older women,
年纪稍微大一点的女人更有智慧 ever so slightly older women, have a wiser view on life
人生更有经验 You know, they're more experienced
情感也更成熟 and more emotionally mature
完全就是我 Me in a nutshell
我觉得那很性感 I find that very attractive
天啊 我不知道接下来要怎样 Oh, God. I have no idea how any of this works anymore
我能吻你吗 Is it all right if I kiss you?
会先征求同意的世代 Aw. The generation who ask
我觉得可以接受 I think that would be acceptable
等我一下下 Give me just one moment
哦买尬 Oh, my God
你这是在干嘛 What are you doing?
"Toes"
Put your hand down, boy
Welcome to my zoo
Put your head inside. My big, black wild while
I can still help you
See the snake-baboon
Funky, chic and smooth
Honey, can you spy. The divine ape-swine
'Cause he can see you
我... I...
没事吧 You all right?
没事 只是... Yeah. It's just...
好吧 Yeah. Okay
哇 好紧哦 Wow. It's really tight
I'm a man. I'm a twisted fool
My hands are twisted, too...
我是一种动物... I am an animal...
天啊 Oh, God
首字母是E that starts with E
这是梅布尔的 Mabel's
I'm a man
I'm a twisted fool
My hands are twisted too
Five fingers. Two black hooves
你让我好硬哦 You make me so hard, baby
你才让我好硬啦 You make me hard
什么 What?
Got toes and I can smile
I'm crooked but upright
怎么会这样 How did that happen?
我戴套了啊 I'm using protection
"Pearls"
La, la, la, la. Whoo
I'm so nine-to-five
-嗨 布莉琪 -早 -Hi, Bridge. -Morning
我有咖啡 I've got coffee
和瑞奇·贾维斯的要求 and I've got Ricky Gervais's requests for today's show
-真的 -真的 -Seriously? -Yeah
-好多要求哦 -是啊 -It's big. -Yeah
-放松角落 -嗯哼 -A relaxation corner. -Uh-huh
三面全身镜 Three full-length mirrors
他只用海蓝之谜保养品 And he'll only use La Mer for some reason?
我知道 I know
-三楼 -三楼 -Ooh. Three, please. -Three
你昨晚爱爱了 Did you have sex last night?
什么 没啦 What? No
Won't you take a hold of me
山姆 瑞奇·贾维斯要来了 Sam! Ricky Gervais is on his way in
他不喝矿泉水 只喝冰岛瓶装水 And, apparently, he won't drink Evian, only Icelandic water
而且一定要有很多碱性成分 And it's got to have lots of alkalines
或是没有碱性成分 Or no alkalines
你昨晚爱爱了 Did you have sex last night?
什么 没啦 What? No!
La, la, la, la
天啊 God!
量尺 拜托 快点 Tape measure, please. Quick
垫子不能 The cushion can't be more
离地超过40公分 瑞奇坐的 than 40 centimetres from the floor for Ricky
你昨晚有没有爱爱 Did you have sex last night?
对 我爱爱了 Yes. I did. Okay? I did
我整晚都在疯狂做爱 I had a full night of utterly mind-blowing sex
跟一个垃圾专家男神 with a tree-rescuing rubbish expert Adonis
年纪比我小一点 who might be slightly younger, probably
而且超爽的 好吗 And it was amazing! Okay?
那又怎样 So what?
Lost in romance
Let's just dance, ooh
Shake it till the pearls. Get lost
La, la, la, la
我不只是妈妈 也是性感尤物 Am not only mother and sexual being,
而且在工作上是个女强人 but also capable working woman at the top of her game
接招吧 克洛伊 So take that, Chloe
我做了芝士通心粉 I've done the macaroni and cheese
不过是用奶油南瓜 but with butternut squash instead
先放在烤箱下层 It's in the bottom oven
20分钟后要移到上层 Just needs to move to the top in about 20 minutes
很好 好吧 Good. Good. Right
我也会这么做 It's just how I would do it
克洛伊 最好 Oh, Chloe, uh, it would be really helpful
前一晚就准备好他们的水壶 to have their water bottles done the night before
放在冰箱右上角 In the fridge. Top right
之前放过期牛奶那儿 Where the expired milk was
太好了... Oh, great. Great. Um...
比利明天会需要多一点零食 Billy will need something extra for snack tomorrow
-他要... -打板球 -He's got... -Cricket, yeah
装进零食袋 写标签 放在面包盒旁边 In a snack bag. Labelled. By the bread bin
我们有面包盒 We have a bread bin?
我得走了 I have to leave, I'm afraid
我和葛拉姆周四要上太极课 Graham and I have tai chi on Thursdays
6点45分整 早点去能占好位置 6:45 sharp, but earlier to get the spot you want
当然了 Course
你跟葛拉姆好好享受太极课 You and Graham enjoy your tai chi
你忘了把比利的板球装备拿出来 Oh, you forgot to leave out Billy's cricket things
不过没关系 我去拿 but never mind. I'll do it
已经放在门旁边了 Bag packed by the door
反正呢 更放松 更快乐的育儿秘诀是 Nevertheless, secret to calmer, happier parenting
搞一夜情 one-night stands
虽然不只是一夜情 Although, it wasn't just one night
我带了派 Brought a pie
"What a Wonderful Thing Love Is"
很搞笑 That was funny
这一刻变成一场约会 And so, a moment turned into a date
又变成一个吻 which turned into a kiss
接着是一个夜晚 Which turned into a night
Ooh
What a wonderful thing...
一个夜晚又变成一个夏天 And the night turned into a summer
I can see. You standing there now
And you're. The prettiest thing
In the crowd
And guess who. Be laughing loud, but me
You made me see the love
That you're giving me
Baby...
Won't you hold my hand?
Just let me know that I'm your man
And show I'm not ashamed
I walk the floor
When you leave me
Hey, baby
I don't know about you
Let me tell you what I'm gonna do
I'm gonna try to make. My dreams come true
With you
早上好 欢迎返校 Morning. Welcome back
-早上好 沃勒克老师 -早 -Good morning, Mr Walliker. -Morning
-早上好 -达西太太 -Morning. -Mrs Darcy
暑假过得怎样 How were your summer holidays?
我有一个新爸爸 I have a new daddy now
他叫罗克斯特 His name is Roxster
每天早上都把妈妈的头发弄乱 and he always gives Mummy a funny hairstyle in the morning
是啊 那不好笑 梅布尔 Yes, well. It's not that funny, is it, Mabel?
超好笑 It is
他不是新爸爸 只是一个人 He's not a new daddy. He's just someone
去吧 Off you go
看来我应该恭喜你 Well, it seems congratulations are in order
你 You!
-快吃 -拜了 妈 -No. You two. Come on. -Bye, Mum. See you soon. Bye
我从安吉拉给你发电子邮件... Bridget, I emailed you from Anguilla about, um...
工作日 我有准备 Jobs Day, yes. I come prepared
我必须说 你整个人变得...很漂亮 I must say, it's a welcome change, all...this
谢谢夸奖 Thank you
同学们 安静下来 谢谢 All right, everyone. Settle down. Settle down. Thank you
沃勒克科学实验室
所以... Um, so...
上学期 戴维德爸爸跟我们分享 Last term, Daveed's dad was kind enough to talk to us
当胸腔外科医师的经验 about being a thoracic surgeon
下星期 尤金妮妈妈会来 and next week, Eugenie's mum will be in
谈谈她当核物理学家的事 to talk about her role as a nuclear physicist
还有获得诺贝尔奖的感受 and how it felt to win the Nobel Prize
但今天是比利妈妈 But today, it's Billy's mum
大家热烈欢迎达西太太 So, everyone, give a warm welcome to Mrs Darcy
大家好 Hello
我是个电视制作人 I am a television producer
我妈说电视让社会变烂 My mum says television is making society rot
谢谢你 普莉希拉 Yes. Well, thank you, Priscilla
好吧 有没有志愿者 OK. May we have a volunteer?
谢谢你 爱丝梅达 Thank you, Esmeralda
来吧 Right
你可以站在这儿 You can stand here
非常好 Very good
你要说"十秒后直播"这种话 And you are going to say things like "Ten seconds to air!"
我会是今天采访来宾的主持人 And I am going to be the interviewer for the day
现在... Now...
我只要... Just...
好了 Right. OK
也许沃勒克老师可以当我采访的来宾 Perhaps Mr Walliker could be the person being interviewed
请坐 Take a seat
好吧 Uh, righto
访谈主题 Now, topic
果蝇的生命周期
The life cycle of the fruit fly. Hmm?
好吧 Right, OK
十秒后直播 Ooh. Ten seconds to air!
大家好 我是布莉琪·琼斯 Hello, this is Bridget Jones
今天很高兴能邀请沃勒克老师上节目 and I'm delighted to have Mr Walliker on the show today
跟我们解释果蝇的生命周期 to help us understand the life cycle of the fruit fly
我很荣幸...能上节目 Um, well, it's a...It's a pleasure to be on the show
谢谢你的问题 And, um, thank you for that question
一般的... Well, the, uh, the average...
谢谢 Thank you
一般的果蝇大约需要两周发育 Uh, the average fly takes about two weeks to mature
寿命可以长达40到50天 and can live for as long as 40 or 50 days
然后就像所有生物一样会死去 And then, like all living things, when it dies, it simply stops
细胞停止运作 Cellular shutdown
然后会逐渐分解 It falls, gradually decomposes
成为土壤系统的一部分 and becomes part of the soil system
但它死后真的就消失了吗 But does it really end when it dies?
问得好 沃勒克老师 Exactly, Mr Walliker
它死后一定还有别的吧 Surely there's more to the story
其实并没有 Um, well. Well, not really
当然有 But, yes
果蝇的身体停止运作之后 After the body of the fruit fly stops working
它的灵魂就能够得到自由了 对吧 uh, then the soul of the fruit fly will be able to be free, yes?
那只果蝇会永远 And that particular fruit fly will always
在某种意义上 与我们同在 in some senses, be with us
果蝇的灵魂 The soul of the fruit fly?
没有灵魂的证据 There's no evidence for a soul
但身体是一个完美的电流系统 but the body is a perfect system of electrical pulses
由心脏提供动力 而心脏就像是泵... powered by the heart, which is in itself a pump, if you will
灵魂 沃勒克老师 是每个生命的精髓 The soul, Mr Walliker, is the essence of every living thing
如果你认为我们只是机械零件 If you think we're simply bits of machinery
可以开或关 that can be switched on or off
那艺术从哪儿来 奇迹呢 诗歌呢 then where does art come from? Or-Or wonder? Or poetry?
-或是魔法 -魔法 -Or magic? -Magic?
果蝇死后 The fruit fly, when it dies
会永远和它的家庭在一起 will stay with its fruit fly family forever
专注在访问重点 布莉琪 Keep the interview on point, Bridget
这是胡说八道 This is utter nonsense
这世界由法则和事实支配 Our world is governed by laws and fact
那是我们的宇宙 That's our universe
-依照理性运作 -卡 -And it is rational. -Cut!
我是现实主义者 达西太太 I'm a realist, Mrs Darcy
我相信真实的事物 I believe in what's real
卡 Cut!
我要去泰莉莎的生日聚会 Off to Talitha's birthday
你确定今晚可以过夜吗 Are you sure you're OK to stay tonight?
你和葛拉姆周四都要上太极课 It's Thursday. I thought you and Graham had tai chi
错过一堂课不会死 对吧 Won't kill him to miss a week, will it?
他很死板的 He's so uptight
你看起来很美 布莉琪 Oh, you look nice, Bridget
试试看 Oh, try this
好了 There
谢了 克洛伊 Thanks, Chloe
比利 梅布尔 桌上有零食 Billy! Mabes! Snacks on the table
他人呢他不来了吗 So where is he? Is he not coming?
没关系 他一定临时有事 Oh, it's fine. He must have been held up
-垃圾的紧急状况吗 -哦 -What? By some sort of rubbish emergency? -Oh
-大概得做完功课吧 -够了 -Probably had to finish his homework. -Stop it
希望他能赶来听故事 Hope he gets here before story time
别惦记了 Shut it!
少来了 布莉琪 Come the fuck on, Bridge
真的有这家伙 Does this guy actually exist
还是像那次 or is it, um, like that one time
你在咖世家咖啡 看到布拉德·皮特 that you saw Brad Pitt at Costa Coffee?
-我真的看到他 -少来了 -It was him. It was. -Come on. Really?
生日快乐 Happy birthday
你抱的是什么 What on earth are you holding?
佩杜拉 Oh, Petula
送我自己的礼物 A present to myself
我已经喜欢它多于任何人 and I already prefer her to any human
来 帮我抱我的宝贝 Oh, here. Can you hold my baby
让我假装很惊讶 while I feign surprise
看到我自己买的蛋糕 at the cake that I chose and bought for myself
好耶 看啊 Oh, look! Look at that!
祝你生日快乐 亲爱的泰莉莎 Happy birthday, dear Talitha
谢谢 看啊 Thank you. Oh, look
祝你生日快乐 Happy birthday to you
谢谢 Thank you
多谢大家今天大驾光临 Thank you all so much for coming today
帮我庆祝 呃 我自己 to help me celebrate, well, me
我们爱你 泰莉莎 We love you, Talitha
-生日快乐 -泰莉莎 -Talitha! -Talitha! Happy birthday
哔哔 哔哔 Beep, beep. Beep, beep
宾可·卡鲁瑟 Binko Carruthers
拜托别过来 拜托 Oh, please don't come over. Please don't
哔哔 Beep, beep
就是她 有名的布莉琪·琼斯 There she is. The famous Bridget Jones
我跟卡斯摩说要带你开车兜风 So I told Cosmo I'd take you out for a spin
周五有空吗 How's Friday?
靠 惨了 Fuck, no!
裘德 快跳下去 救命啊 Jude, get in there. Come on, get the fuck in there! God, help!
我的天啊 Oh, my God. Oh!
-佩杜拉 快上来 -佩杜拉 -Petula, come on, darling. -Petula! Petula!
"Mad About the Boy"
I'm mad about the boy
And I know it's stupid
To be mad about the boy
那谁啊 Who's that?
I'm so ashamed of it
But must admit. The sleepless nights I've had
About the boy
Ooh, ooh, ooh
On the silver screen...
He melts my foolish heart. In every single scene
Although I'm quite aware...
That here and there. Are traces...
-这应该是你的 -谢谢你 -I think this belongs to you. -Thank you
About the boy
Lord knows I'm not a fool girl
-哈啰 -嗨 -Hello. -Hi
I really shouldn't care
Lord knows I'm not a school girl
Who's in the flurry...
抱歉 公交车开得好慢 Sorry I'm late. Buses were a nightmare
没关系 It's fine
真是抱歉 Oh, I'm so sorry
它从我的怀里跳下去 She just jumped out of my arms
不用道歉 Do not apologise
这个小鲜肉 Oh, my darling
让我帮你换掉湿衣服 Let me help you out of those wet clothes
不准拿衣服给他穿 No. Don't you dare redress him
-你好美哦 -你才帅咧 -You look gorgeous. -You look gorgeous
All because I'm mad
About the boy
那才算是我说的重新建立形象 Now that, my darling, is what I call a rebrand
嗨 我是罗克斯特 Hi. I'm Roxster
"Praise You"
We've come a long. Long way together
希望他够成熟 I hope he's up to it, darling
Through the hard times. And the good
I have to celebrate you. Baby
I have to praise you like I should
I have to praise you
哈啰 Hello
滚开 Oh, fuck off
I have to praise you like I should
I have to praise you
"I Want a Little Sugar In My Bowl"
I want a little sugar. In my bowl
如果有上帝 他那晚一定有很多事要处理 If there is a God, I'm sure he had more to deal with that night
不是只顾我的幸福 than my personal happiness
不过感觉他好像放下一切 but it did feel like he'd taken the night off everything else
只专注在我身上 to focus on me
但是后来... But then...
真希望我有时光机 I wish I had a time machine
Feel so funny
I feel so sad
What's the matter, baby?
时光机 A time machine
Come on, save my soul
他喝得太嗨 泄漏了他真正的想法 In his moment of inebriated joy, he had given himself away
In my bowl
年纪对他很重要 It mattered to him
他终于认清 And with that came
我们避而不谈的事实 the elephant stomping heavily into the room
"A Little Respect"
I try to discover...
罗克斯特 很久没你的消息
没事吧 只想知道你好不好
搞失踪 Ghosting
结束一段关系的做法 The practice of ending a relationship
突然毫无解释地 by suddenly and without explanation
失去任何联系 withdrawing from all communication
That you give me. No reason why you...
慢慢揭开被甩掉的事实 The slow unveiling of reality and rejection
没事吧 打给我
That you give me no. That you give me no
That you give me no. That you give me no...
既随意又残酷 The casual cruelty
I hear you calling
Oh, baby, please...
Give a little respect
To me
What religion or reason
哈啰 罗克斯特
Could cause a man. To forsake his lover?
Don't you tell me no...
对方搞失踪别传信息 Do not text when ghosted
Don't you tell me no. Soul...
喝醉了别发信息 Do not text when drunk
I hear you calling
Oh, baby, please
Give a little respect
To me
你也给他搞失踪 Ghost the bastard back, Bridget
就让他化为虚无吧 Just let him disintegrate into nothingness
网络就像是丛林 It can be a jungle out there
是啊 我就是大熊猫 Yep. And I'm the giant panda
与性绝缘 注定要孤单一辈子 sexually obsolete and destined to be alone forever
不行 你要适应和生存 No. You will adapt and survive like we all do
我曾经穿防弹衣登上《浮华世界》封面 I used to be on the cover of Vanity Fair in a flak jacket
现在登上 And now I'm on
《居家生活》的封面 拿着蛋糕 the cover of Good Housekeeping with a pavlova
凯西... Cathy...
你的好货呢 Where's your special stuff?
高清电视对主持人来说 HD TV was an extinction-level event
是一场灭绝级的灾难 for the fearless career television presenter
我要把你带到人生的下一篇章 I'm about to usher you into your next chapter
丰唇精华液 暗网上买的 Lip serum. I get it on the dark web
-合法吗 -当然了 -Is it legal? -Absolutely
在委内瑞拉 In Venezuela
拿去 Here, take it
适应和生存 Adapt and survive
肯定起了作用 Ooh. Something's definitely happening
不是很惨就是很赞 It's either disastrous or totally fantastic
妈妈 Mummy!
嗨 亲爱的 Hi, sweetie
靠 我的声音怎么了 Shit. What's happening to my voice?
梅布尔鞋子穿反了 Mabel's shoes are on the wrong feet
不对 我的脚长反了 No. My feet are on the wrong legs
傻妞 Silly thing
妈妈 你的嘴巴怪怪的 Mummy, something's wrong with your mouth
没有啊 No. No, there isn't
有啦 你看 Yes, there is. Look
你的嘴唇很奇怪 Your lips are all funny right there
亲爱的 别说傻话 Darling, don't be ridiculous
梅布尔 把鞋子换过来 好吗 All right, Mabel, let's get these swapped over, shall we?
脱掉了 Out we pop. All right
你最好别再那么做 达西太太 I wouldn't do that again if I were you, Mrs Darcy
原来的你就很好 You looked all right to begin with
好了 All right
你想变年轻 You're trying to look younger
结果却活像 and the effects have marked similarities
一个中风的老太婆 to those of an elderly stroke victim
你在流口水 You're actually drooling now
天啊 Oh, dear
我很清楚我的候诊室 Now, acutely aware as I am of my waiting room
挤满了真正的病人... filled to capacity with actual patients...
更别说我是妇产科医师 Not to mention the fact that I am a gynaecologist
应该治疗你的阴唇 and that particular set of lips is
而不是嘴唇... as it were, broadly speaking, at the wrong end...
但 我还是要问你 I am nonetheless going to ask you the question
布莉琪 你还好吧 "Bridget, are you OK?"
说好就可以 A simple yes will suffice
不好 No
都是你的错啦 It's all your fault
我脱掉睡衣
人生就彻底崩溃
我因为阴唇粘合找到小鲜肉男友
他才12岁 结果因为我太老甩掉我
我听你的建议回去工作 结果呢
周一要参加一场野外体验旅行
马克的生日又快到了 他们迟早
会把孩子们带走 然后送去给
完美到可怕的克洛伊永远照顾
"别当个...傻女"
上面写"别当个傻女"
傻妞 我的字太潦草 "Twat". Sorry, it's doctor's handwriting
是女字边的妞 That's an A, in the middle there
我听到"睡衣"以后就恍神了 Now, I rather zoned out after "pyjamas"
但小鲜肉不是解答 丰唇也不是 but a toy boy is not the answer, Bridget, and nor are big lips
你是有两个乖小孩的寡妇 You're a widow with two wonderful children who adore you
试着面对屁事 You're just trying to cope with a shitty situation
拥抱混乱 Embrace the chaos
那只是过敏反应 That's just a simple allergic reaction to
羟基甲氧基苯基丙基甲基甲氧基苯并呋喃 hydroxymethoxyphenyl propylmethylmethoxybenzofuran
要命的化学成分 in whatever infernal concoction
你用来擦嘴唇 you've smeared on your mouth
这是抗组织胺 会立刻见效 This is an antihistamine. It'll work straight away
可以治好嘴唇 It's for the lips
他们还没发明治好傻妞的药 They still haven't invented anything for being a twat
喂 Hello
对 我是布莉琪 Yes, this is Bridget
当然 我马上赶去 Of course! Straight away
好的 Yes, yes
丹尼尔 Daniel
我的老天爷 布莉琪琼斯 Well, by all that's holy, Bridget Jones
你能赶来真好 Nice of you to come, Jones
早知道就穿更小号的病袍 If I'd known, I'd have worn a tinier nightie
发生什么事 What happened?
我的心脏 My heart
两个惊喜 我有心脏和它有杂音 Two massive surprises. One, I have one. Two, it murmurs
医生听诊过了 They've, um, had a listen and I don't know
你没事吧 Are you OK?
我以为我心脏病发作 Well, I thought I was having a heart attack
人生像电影从我眼前闪过 My whole life passed before my eyes
你的戏份很重 最好的部分 You actually featured prominently, Jones. All the best bits
罗马 迷你周末 Rome. Mini-break weekend
在超市做爱 Sodomy in Sainsbury's
但主要是我 But, uh, mainly, it was just me
在国王路晃来晃去 wandering up and down the King's Road
想要撩20岁嫩妹 trying to twinkle at 20-year-olds
也许这是重新开始的机会 Perhaps it's an opportunity for a new beginning
全新的丹尼尔 Brand-new Daniel
我要留在这儿... I think I shall stay right here...
直到你答应 Until you agree
你人真好 但... Well that is kind of you, Bridge, but, um...
他们说我时间不多 They told me I don't have long
-什么 -我不是说死 -What? -No, no, no. Fuck. No, not that
也许是啊... Well, maybe that. No, they, uh...
他们要带我去做检查 They're taking me for some tests in a minute
我是不是变得有点可怜 The question is, would we say I've become a fraction tragic?
他们要我写下最近的亲属 They asked me to put down my next of kin
我想到的唯一 And the only person I could think of
会稍微关心我的人 是你 who might remotely care was you
-你嘴真甜 -不是故意的 -That's very sweet. -Yeah, but not deliberately
重点是 The point is, Bridge
我这把年纪怎么会没有近亲 how have I arrived at this point in my life with no kin?
我怎么可能没有亲人 How could I possibly be kinless?
不是这样 你不是没有亲人 But you're not. You're not kinless
恩佐两岁后我就没见过他 Well, I haven't seen Enzo since he was two
他现在跟他妈过得很幸福 And he is now being happily raised by his mother
和一个把毛衣当披肩的意大利贵族 and an Italian aristocrat who wears his jumper like a shawl
你真幸运 So, lucky you, Jones
你有两个乖小孩... Your two, the way they look at you...
让我领悟到... Just makes one realise...
是我自己搞砸的 One's own fuck-ups, really
早知如此何必当初 The glory of what might have been
你知道... Did you know...
我跟吉赛儿一开始很幸福吗 It was actually quite good with Gisele at the beginning?
我得面对事实... I have to face the fact...
我跟她也许能修成正果 that it may have been, Jones, love
得到真正的幸福 The real thing
我还是不知道她不爽我什么 I still don't know what she was so pissed off about
你跟她妹妹上床 You shagged her sister
只有一次 她反应过度 Once. Massive overreaction
天啊 我爱你 丹尼尔 God, I love you, Daniel
虽然你这辈子真的很不靠谱 Despite your really quite impressive
是个不折不扣的大混蛋 lifelong dedication to total fuckwittage
是啊 Yeah
很多事我不了解 There's a lot I don't know
超多的 An awful lot
但我知道 我的孩子会付出一切 But I do know that my children would give anything at all
只为了再陪他们爸爸一天 to have just one day with their dad
该做检查了 克利弗先生 Time for your obs, Mr Cleaver
好吧 Oh, right
再说一次 你真的不必 And, again, there is really no need for you
脱掉病袍 to remove your gown
抱歉 Sorry
好吧 Okey-doke
天啊 God
准备进入料理环节 Then lights down on the cooking segment
我为什么非得主持料理这趴 Why do I always have to do the cooking bits?
他上次做的栗子意大利饺 That chestnut ravioli he cooked last time
是我放进过嘴巴最恶烂的东西 was the worst thing I've ever put in my mouth
那可不一定 I highly doubt that
米兰达 你要走到镜头前面说 And then, Miranda, you cross to the stage
《女人秀》欢迎这位神秘嘉宾之类的 "And now, on Better Women, a surprise guest". Blah blah
然后打灯 And lights!
Yeah, I'm a fighter
And I made it through
Solid gold survivor That's...
等等 Hold it!
莱纳斯 我们得排练跟着她的动作打灯 Linus, we've got to practise following her with the lights
所以... So, uh...
也许你能跳一跳舞 Maybe you could dance a bit? Yeah?
-呃... -好哦 跳啊 莱纳斯 -Uh... -OK. Go, Linus!
So give me light
You've got to find. Your own road...
帮我拿一下 Can you hold that, please?
看好了 你得放开来跳 See, you've got to, you know, go for it
Help me see...
因为他会这样... Cause she's going to, you know...
And no more light. And no more love
It's not over...
It's not over
I won't save you when I'm weak
Only got so much left To give
It's not over
Till I'm done...
Till I'm done
-看到了吗 莱纳斯 -嗨 -See, Linus? -Hi, B
噢靠 Oh, shit
我带了派 Brought a pie
抱歉 他们叫我直接进来 Sorry, they just told me to come in
你给我搞失踪 罗克斯特 You disappeared, Roxster
我知道 I know
我慌了 I panicked
我害怕了 所以逃走 I got...I got scared, and I ran
但我要这一切 But I want this
我要你 You
我以为我没准备好 但我准备好了 I thought I wasn't ready, but I am
我以为我... I thought I...
我想要同年纪的人 但我不要 I don't know, wanted somebody my own age, but I don't
我爱你 布莉琪 I love you, Bridget
我准备好了 I'm ready for all of it
包括比利和梅布尔 For Billy and Mabel
烤焦的千层面 And burnt lasagne
还有史莱姆 那一切 And slime. And all of it
我保证我准备好了 I promise you, I am ready
我不确定那重不重要 I'm not sure that matters
什么意思我不懂 What do you mean? I don't...I don't understand
你真的很贴心 You're so lovely,
以后会是个好伴侣和好爸爸 and you're going to be a brilliant partner and dad
你也会发现 And you're going to discover
各种能改变世界的垃圾 all sorts of garbage that will change the world
不是这样 That's not how it works
但不是和我一起 But not with me
我也希望有个时光机 I wish I had a time machine too
好让你赶上我 So you could catch up
你确定 Are you...Are you sure?
确定 I am
派我就留着咯 I'll keep the pie, if that's OK
再见 布莉琪 Goodbye, Bridget
家长日 Parents' evening
单亲家长最惨的一天 Is there a worse night for the single parent?
他们总是假设家长是复数 They call it parents' evening as if it's a plural
总是会有两位家长 As if it's a given that there's two of us
只能打起精神熬过去 Oh, well. Chin up and onward
达西太太 Mrs Darcy
很高兴见到你 It's good to see you
很高兴回到摄影棚 Good to be back in the studio
精彩的果蝇辩论 The great fruit fly debate
小小的秘密 Small secret
你有趣50倍 It was about 50 times more interesting
比胸腔外科医生 than that bloody thoracic surgeon
更别提那位物理学家 And don't get me started on the physicist
这年头谁都能得诺贝尔奖 I mean, they'll hand out Nobels to anyone these days
是啊 Oh, yeah
所以 比利 So, uh, Billy
他板球打得很好 Well, he's, um...He's an excellent cricketer
也是个优秀的小科学家 he's a very good young scientist
他的头脑很好 He's...he's got a good brain
他有条有理 实验设计得非常周全 He's methodical, his experiments are well drawn up
我是说... Look, I mean, it's just, uh...
他的整体表现都很好 It's excellent work all round
-那就好 -只有一件事 达西太太... -Good. -It's just this, Mrs Darcy. I'm...
我... I'm a...
我有点担心他 I'm a bit concerned about him
担心 怎么说 他做了什么 Concerned? Concerned how? What's he done?
他什么都没做 他... No, he hasn't done anything. He's, um...
他只是有点... He's just been a bit, uh...
孤僻 Withdrawn
他为什么会孤僻 Why is he withdrawn?
家里一切都好吗 Everything's been all right at home?
当然咯 一切都很好 Yes, yes. It's all fine
你和你那位... Everything OK with your, um...
美发师呢 Hairdresser?
他我们分了 但是...对啦... Him? No, but...but yes. Uh...
他很孤僻 He's withdrawn?
我不是故意让你担心 Well, I don't mean to alarm you
-不好意思 -沃勒克老师 抱歉 -Sorry about that. Yep, exactly. -Mr Walliker, sorry, sorry
我们来早了 We're a couple of minutes early
但时间太短了 but these sessions are so short
我还有问题要问你 And I have more than a few questions for you
不介意吧 You don't mind, do you, Bridget?
我们有两个儿子 所以... We do have the two boys, so...
不会啦...没关系 Not at all. No. That's...It's fine
-我要开静音 -谢谢 -Mate, I'm gonna have to put you on mute. -Thank you
好吧 -今天是家长日 -Right. -I've got parents' evening
马克·达西 国际知名的 Mark Darcy, the leading international
人权律师 humanitarian rights lawyer
今早在苏丹达佛地区遇害 was killed this morning in the Darfur region in Sudan
一枚地雷 a land mine
这位55岁的律师来到战区... The 55-year-old was in the war-torn region
在加入国际救援之后... after joining international efforts...
达西先生是国际知名人权律师 Mr Darcy was a leading international figure in human rights
擅于解决危机... and crisis resolution...
举世闻名 gained global recognition
因为阿汗尼诉海尼案 with the Kafir Aghani and Eleanor Heaney case
他当然取得胜诉 which, of course, he won
他留下妻子布莉琪·琼斯 He leaves behind his wife, Bridget Jones
和一对年幼儿女 比利和梅布尔 and their two young children, Billy and Mabel
请关注更多相关报道 More on this story as we get it
马克·达西 苏丹爆炸案受害者
讣闻
亲爱的马克 Dearest darling Mark
周日是你生日 但... it's your birthday on Sunday, and...
我一个人很不会处理这一切 ...I'm just no good at doing this on my own
很抱歉 我是糟糕的妈妈 I'm sorry I'm such a bad mother
很抱歉 我恋上一个小鲜肉 I'm sorry I got caught up with a callow toy boy
很抱歉 我去学校迟到 还把比利搞孤僻 I'm sorry I'm late for school and that Billy's withdrawn
没有你陪他们长大 They're growing up without you
比利该怎么学会 How is Billy going to understand
当男人 没有爸爸 how to be a man without his father?
梅布尔该怎么度过人生 How is Mabel going to live her life
从来没认识你 having never really known you at all?
请原谅 我会这么难过 Please forgive me for being upset
不是因为失去你 about anything which isn't about not having you
请帮助我面对这一切 Please help me find a way to do this
不会觉得我毁了 without feeling like I'm ruining
人生最重要的部分 the most important part of my life
仍然有你在的部分 The only part that still has you in it
我得写 I have to put down
需要几张圣诞音乐会门票 how many tickets we need for my Christmas concert
要写两张吗 你和梅布尔 Should I put down two? For you and Mabel?
三张 Put three
梅布尔 我和克洛伊 Mabel, me and Chloe
好 三张 OK. Three
-画好了 -我也是 -Finished. -Me too
爸爸一定会喜欢 Daddy will love these
爸爸 天堂 太空
太完美了 They're perfect
好耶 Yes
-你写信了吗 -写了 -Did you write one, Mummy? -I did
明天寄给爸爸 好吗 Tomorrow, can we post them to Daddy?
当然好啊 Of course we can
马克的生日终于到了... And Mark's birthday came as it always did...
就像所有的节庆 圣诞节和周年纪念日 Like all the celebrations, Christmases and anniversaries
所有的爱和痛苦 All the love and all the pain
准备好了吗 OK. Ready?
数到三 On three
一 二... One, two...
该怎么办 当我数到... What am I going to do when I get to...
三 Three
我拥有这世上最爱的一切 What I have is what I love most in the world
比利和梅布尔 Billy and Mabel
就我们三个人 Just the three of us
"Should I Stay or Should I Go"
Whoo!
-沃勒克老师 -达西太太 -Mr Walliker. -Mrs Darcy
Darling, you got to let me. Know...
比利 Billy!
-哈啰 -哈啰 -Hello! -Hello!
准备好了吗 Ready?
如果你说你属于我 If you say that you are mine
我会等你到天荒地老 I'll be here till the end. Of time
所以你得告诉我 So you got to let me know
我是留还是走 Should I stay. Or should I go?
现在我是留还是走 Should I stay. Or should I go now?
我走了 会有麻烦事 If I go. There will be trouble
我留下 麻烦事更多 And if I stay. It will be double
所以你得告诉我 So you gotta let me know
我是留还是走 Should I stay. Or should I go?
好好散步 Have a good walk, then
谢谢你 Thank you
拜 Bye
大家围过来 All right, come in
现在... Now...
这并不只是"散步" What this is not is a "walk"
我们即将展开一场 We are about to embark as a team
定向越野冒险 on an orienteering adventure
-大家都有指南针吗 -有 -So do you each have your compasses? -Yes!
-地图呢 -有 -Do you each have your maps? -Yes!
分成两组 水獭组 举手 Right then, you know your groups. Hands up, Otters!
你们要跟 You'll go along with
柯林老师和帕斯瑞恰太太 Mr Collins and Bikram's mum, Mrs Pasricha
比利妈妈 达西太太 Billy's mum, Mrs Darcy
你抽到下下签了 You've drawn the short straw, I'm afraid
你要加入我和鱼鹰组 You'll be joining me and the Ospreys
这一点非常重要 Now, this is very important
记得睁大眼睛 好好看看周围 Remember to open your eyes and look around
这是世界上最美的地方之一 This is one of the most beautiful places on earth
好好享受 Enjoy it
出发吧 Let's go
-达西太太 你行吗 -当然 -You sure you're up to this, Mrs Darcy? -Absolutely!
我当过女王向导 I was a Queen's Guide
拿到先锋勋章 Got my Pioneer badge
我会串绳 打结 接绳和捆绑 I can rope, knot, splice and lash
需要捆绑的话 找我就对了 If you need anything tied up, I'm your girl
好吧 你负责殿后 Right then. Bring up the rear
好啊 我来殿后 Yes! Bringing up the rear!
没问题 Up!
后面会看到更多水 We're gonna see much more water than that
我来殿后 Up the rear!
没问题 Yep
确定大家都跟上来 Make sure everybody's with us
你们看得到第二道瀑布吧 You can see the second waterfall, can't you?
那两道连在一起 Well, those two are together
来了 Coming!
快点 Hurry along. Come on!
-手给我 -好酷哦 -Give me your hand. -Wow. So cool
好了 OK
很好 Right
-有Wi-Fi密码吗 -别傻了 -Is there a Wi-Fi password? -Oh, Atticus, don't be a pillock
把这块防水布 All right, take this tarp
铺在那边的地上 and spread it out on the floor over there, all right?
快点 Come on
没关系 是干的 It's all right. It's dry
达西太太 用手推车 Mrs Darcy, could you take that wheelbarrow
捡一些木柴 雨停后生火 pick up some firewood for when the rain stops?
好的 Yep
大家尽量把自己弄干 All right, everyone. Do your best to get dry
哇哩咧 Ding-fucking-dong
快点啊 Whenever you're ready
我们会待在这儿一阵子 Looks like we'll be here for a while
超恶烂的 都烧焦了 It really is absolutely disgusting. Burnt to a crisp
只有表面而已 I think you'll find it's a brûlée
好了 该睡觉了 Come on, then. Off to Bedfordshire
晚安 沃勒克老师 Goodnight, Mr Walliker
-来吧 -好好睡一觉 -Here we are. -Sleep well, team
-大家都很赞 -谢谢 -Well done today. -Thank you
好了 晚安 Okay. Night night
晚安 Goodnight
任务完成 Mission accomplished
孩子们在谷仓睡觉 One barnful of sleeping children
别误会 Don't get me wrong
我很佩服你的应变能力 I'm quite impressed by your resourcefulness
但谁去湖区 but who travels to the Lake District
背包会装满棉花糖 with a backpack full of marshmallows?
所有的家长都知道 棉花糖 All parents know the marshmallow
是必备工具 is an essential tool, Mr Walliker
你有小孩吗 Do you have children?
没有 我没有小孩 Uh, no. No, no, I never did any of that
但是... But, um...
很奇怪 你心里 It's funny. In the back of your mind
总觉得可能会有... you think it might happen, and...
不过你知道的 But, you know, one day
有一天 你在准备元素周期表考试... you're preparing a test for a periodic table...
发现这是你出的第27份考卷 and you realise it's the 27th one you've set
从来没有抽出时间 and there's just never been time
真正考虑过要拥有... to really think about having anything like a...
一个家庭 Like a family in between
但这样也好 But it's good
我很好... It's good. I, uh...
这很适合我 Well, it suits me
看来的确是 I see it does
看看这一切 I mean, look at that
这整个世界 All of it
你问我奇迹和魔法在哪儿 You asked me where's the wonder and the magic
问得好 It's a good question
我觉得就在这儿 I think it's here
你不相信魔法 沃勒克老师 You don't believe in magic, Mr Walliker
没错 No
但我在思考 Well, I've been thinking
妈妈 Mummy?
艾特克斯很害怕 Atticus is really frightened
他妈妈会唱歌剧给他听 He says his mum sings Puccini to him when he's scared
他可能 只能听我唱接招合唱团了 Well, he might have to settle for some early Take That
让我试试看 好吗 but I'll see what I can do, okay?
老师 我能陪你坐一下吗 Mr Walliker, do you mind if I sit here for a minute?
当然了 坐吧 Of course. Sit down
-你是不是想问... -我在想... -Is there anything you want to... -It's just...
要是我忘记他呢 What if I forget him?
我不想忘记他 I don't wanna forget him
但要是我忘记他呢 But what if I do?
让我告诉你 比利... Let me tell you this, Billy, um...
你爸爸无所不在 Your dad is everywhere
他无所不在 He's everywhere
就是现在... Right now...
这一刻 In this moment
那是科学事实 And that's a scientific fact
能量只会被转移 Energy is only transferred
永远不会消失 It can never be destroyed
更重要的是 And more importantly
你父亲在你心中 your father is in you
梅布尔也一样 And Mabel
比利 告诉我... Billy, tell me something...
一件事... One thing...
你记得 你爸爸最棒的一件事 That you remember best about your dad
"Turn on the Lights"
Another Christmas. Is around the corner
And I can feel us, darling. Getting closer
It's coming down the road. And stopping it now
这儿有热巧克力
Stopping it now Is impossible...
能不能 Can we?
-可以吗 -可以 -May we. -Yes
I built a snowman out. The back
It came alive. And flew me. Round this sleepy town
I put an old scarf round. Its neck...
小心 Careful!
And every time. You kiss me...
快点 Chop-chop
一二 一二 One, two. One, two
我可以喝你的热巧克力吗 May I have your hot chocolate?
-不行 -好啦 -No. No! -Yes. Yes
棉花糖 Marshmallows!
梅布尔 我带你去座位 来吧 Mabel, why don't I take you to your seat? Come on
可以吗 Is that all right?
别拖拖拉拉 达西太太 Don't dawdle, Mrs Darcy
表演要开始了 Show's starting
好啦 Yes, of course
-听起来很棒 -是啊 -That sounds fantastic. -Yeah
七点餐厅见 I'll see you at Nobu at 700
真是够了 维克多 Oh, for God's sake, Victor
大烂人 Fucking prick
好啊 好啊 Bravo! Bravo
谢谢 艾洛斯和艾特克斯 Thank you, Eros and Atticus Soltani-Watkins
虽然这没在节目表 Now, although it's not on the programme
但还有...一首歌 we do have one...One more song
这对这位歌手意义重大 Um, I happen to know it means a lot to our singer
这也是他第一次的独唱表演 And, um...well, this is his first-ever solo performance
他会感到很骄傲 and I know he'll do himself proud
"Anything"
我愿为你 I'd do anything
付出一切 亲爱的 在所不辞 For you, dear, anything
因为你就是我的 For you mean everything
全部 To me
我知道 I know that
为搏你一笑 我愿走遍天涯海角 I'd go anywhere For your smile
走遍天涯海角只为搏你一笑 anywhere For your smile
看尽世间万物 Everywhere I'd see
你愿意爬山吗 Would you climb a hill?
愿意 Anything
戴一朵水仙花 愿意 Wear a daffodil? Anything
把遗产都留给我 愿意 Leave me all your will? Anything
甚至跟比尔打架 Even fight my Bill?
什么 打架 What? Fisticuffs?
我愿赴汤蹈火 I'd risk everything
换一个吻 在所不辞 For one kiss, everything
是的 我愿为你 Yes, I'd do anything
付出一切 Anything
为你 For you
好耶 比利 Go, Billy!
好啊 Bravo!
我的宝贝儿子 Oh, my darling
爸爸会为你感到骄傲 Daddy would be so proud of you
我知道 I know
好样的 你唱得真好 Well done, Billy. You nailed it
-你吓了一跳吗 -是啊 -Were you surprised, Mum? -Yes
-够天才 -双击掌 -Genius. -Up top
-我能去毕肯家过夜吗 -可以 -So, can I have a sleepover with Bikram? -Yes
-你有没有带... -有 -And did you bring my... -Yes
毕肯 任天堂 Bikram! Nintendo!
沃勒克老师 比利... Mr Walliker, Billy was...
他的表演... The whole thing was...
-就像... -就像魔法一样 -It was...-It was magic, Mrs Darcy
并不是 No, it wasn't
你为比利做的事... What you've done for Billy...
代表要放下什么 you know, leaving something behind
放下你爱过的人 you know, leaving someone you love behind
但也许更像是突然意识到 but perhaps it's more that suddenly you see
你可以失去那一切 也能继续生活 you can live at the same time as all the things you've lost
就算没有那一切也能得到幸福 and that you can be happy even without them
今晚当我看到儿子站上舞台 And tonight, I saw my son up there
是我这四年来第一次知道 and I understood for the first time in four years
他会好好的 that he's going to be okay
我们也会好好的 And so, we're going to be okay
都是你的功劳 And you did that, Mr Walliker
那不是魔法 It wasn't magic
而是你 It was you
所以我会忽视你总是有点冷漠无情... So, I'll overlook your tendency to be a little aloof...
有人会说是高高在上 Some might call it condescending
或是目中无人 Supercilious is a good word
你可能听得不够多 但重点是... and you probably don't hear it enough, but the point is...
谢谢你 Thank you
沃勒克老师 Mr Walliker?
我们要去西班牙人酒馆 We're going to The Spaniards for a drink
如果你也想来 Um, and if you wanted to come
我们会在那儿 well, we'd be there
因为我们会去那儿 because that's where we'll be
天才不是教出来的啊 Can't be taught. Can't be taught
-太棒了 -达西太太 -It was unbelievable. -Mrs Darcy
竖笛表演太成功了 The flautists, an absolute triumph
我看过最棒的圣诞节表演 One of the best Christmas shows I've ever seen
真的很精彩 Christmas shows don't get much better than that
太棒了 Extraordinary
才没有 别那样看我 No, it doesn't. Don't look at me like that
-比利 怎样 -比利 -Billy! How did it go? -Billy!
我表演独唱 I did a solo
恭喜了 Congratulations
坐过来 Come here. Have a squidge
他唱得很棒 He was brilliant
我打赌一定很赞 Well done. I bet you were
-克洛伊有视频 -你好可爱 -Chloe has a video. -You look lovely
-有视频 -视频 -There's a video? -A video?
克洛伊视频 Chloe? Video?
恭喜了 Congratulations
嗨 四杯大杯的白酒 Hi. Uh, four, uh...Large glasses of white wine, please
白酒 Wine. Wine
开趴就要喝白酒 Oh, house white. Party petrol
-毕肯来了 -你们的白酒 -Bikram's here! -Your wine, ladies
-你在下面干嘛 -没干嘛 -What are you doing down there? -Nothing
-开喝吧 -恭喜了 -Well, there we go. -Congratulations, darling
-敬比利 -他真的很赞 -To Billy. -He was wonderful. Billy
-非常棒 -是啊 -Absolutely wonderful. -Yes
他这么嗨 我...就知道一定很成功 But I can tell you, I...I knew from his glow it was a triumph
只要尝到成功的滋味... No, honestly. I mean, once you've tasted success...
你只有一首单曲 You had literally one song, Tom
我老妈总是说 Yes, you know, my mother always says
没好话要说 就乖乖闭嘴 if you've got nothing nice to say, then shut the fuck up
你妈是对的 给我闭嘴 Your mother's right, so shut the fuck up
我们才不要闭嘴 We should never shut the fuck up
不可以叫别人闭嘴 Stop telling everyone else to shut the fuck up
当然可以 We can, yes
-快啊 -真棒 -No. Come on. -Good overtaking
不是我 是他 No, I didn't. That was him
妈 那边 Mum. That way
沃勒克老师 Mr Walliker!
你不进去吗 Aren't you coming in?
其实我... Well, actually, I was. I...
我想跟你说件事 但时机不对 I wanted to say something to you, but it's the wrong time
你正在和朋友聚会 You're there with everyone, and...
我也比较会面对小朋友 I'm better with people about four foot tall
尤其是125公分以下的小朋友... four'1". That's my sweet spot, as it turns out, so...
你要去哪儿 Where are you going?
我只想谈谈牛顿 Well, look, I really just wanted to discuss Newton
牛顿 Newton?
我们谈过牛顿的第二定律重力 I mean, we already covered Newton's second law, gravity
当你假装没卡在树上 in the tree when you were pretending not to be stuck
但我感兴趣的不是第二定律 But the one that's always fascinated me isn't the second law
任何人都知道苹果会掉下来 I mean, any idiot can see that an apple's gonna fall down
难道会飞上天吗 What's it gonna do, fall up?
第二定律被捧得太夸张 It's a hopelessly overrated law, the second
我一直对第三定律感兴趣 No, the one that's always interested me is the third law
你一定知道 You'll know what that is
是啊 Yes
当然了 但是请说 Of course. But go on
每一个作用力都有相等的反作用力 For every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction
宇宙的基本法则 It's a fundamental law of our universe
这是...无法逃避的事实 It's, uh...It's an inescapable fact of our existence
我只想说你就是... and I was coming to say that you are...
这股力量 达西太太... This force, Mrs Darcy...
对我来说 To me
相等和...相反 Equal and...opposite
就跟牛顿预测的一样无法抗拒 And just as Newton predicted, it's irresistible
我明白了 I see it
仅仅是站在这儿 也感觉到了 Right now, just standing here, I feel it
就像我小时候第一次看这世界 and it's as real to me as the things I loved when I was a boy
爱上的一切那么真实 and first started looking at the world
我们这些科学家 You see, it's not really order
爱上的并不是秩序 达西太太 that we science people fall in love with, Mrs Darcy
而是万物的美丽 it's the beauty in things
也就是 The beauty
你散发的... to be specific...
美丽 In you
我...很抱歉 Oh, I'm...I'm sorry
-我在胡言乱语 -不 -I don't know what I was thinking. -No, no
所以我才决定不进去 This is exactly why I decided not to come in
我很显然理解错了... I've clearly got entirely the wrong end of the...
我只想告诉你 Look, I just want you to know
这不会尴尬 that this is not going to be awkward at all. At all
-请别再说了 -比利和学校 -Please stop talking. -With Billy and school
假装这没发生过... Let's just pretend this never happened, please. Let's just...
我不吻你 就要吹哨子 It was either that or a whistle,
我没带哨子 沃勒克老师 and I haven't got a whistle, Mr Walliker
拜托叫我史考特 Call me Scott, for God's sake
好的 沃勒克老师 Yes, Mr Walliker
"Am I the Same Girl"
跨年夜
一年后
很好 继续摇 用力摇 Right, shake it, shake it, shake it. No, go mad
很好 倒出来 That's it. Now pour it out
真棒 Very good
放一颗樱桃 Insert one cherry
那就是色妞调酒的做法 And that, my friends, is how we make a Dirty Bitch
天啊 那可能是呛辣妞调酒 拿去 Christ. That may even be a Filthy Bitch. Pass that round
下一种调酒很像但不一样 Now, similar but not at all the same
坏妈妈 the Bad Mummy
来点伏特加 Little bit of vodka
-干嘛 -过来 -Yeah? -Come here
好吧 你来负责 Okay, you're in charge
那就是他吗 Is that who I think it is?
是啊 你觉得怎样 So they tell me, yeah. What do you think?
你的眼神好忧郁 You have sad eyes, angelo mio
让我也很忧郁 Why so sad? They make me sad
我想看你笑 I want to see the smile
别闹了 Stop it
他才16岁 He's 16!
是啊 大器晚成 Yeah. Late starter
你来自哪儿 Where in Italy are you from?
-波隆那 -波隆那 -Bologna. -Bologna
-是啊 -再说一次 -Yeah. -Say it again
-波隆那 -波隆那 -Bologna. -Bologna
孩子们要上楼看电影 来不来 Enzo, the kids are gonna watch a movie upstairs. You coming?
他要留下来 He'll stay
孩子们 Boys
你一定很骄傲 I think you're proud
其实是松了一口气 Relief, really, Jones
亲人 就像你说的 Kin, as you said
-恩佐 -干嘛 -Enzo. -Yeah?
失陪一下 -好 -I beg your pardon. -Okay
-拜 -拜 -Ciao. -Ciao
这是女主人 This is your hostess
你老爸一生的最爱 布莉琪·琼斯 and one of the great loves of your father's life, Bridget Jones
很高兴见到你 恩佐 It's nice to meet you, Enzo
他说很荣幸认识你 He says it is a great honour to meet you
然后他说那是 And then he says that those are
很奇怪的小靴子 very, very silly little boots
你真的是玉树临风 You have incredible posture
你是丹麦人吗 You're not Danish, are you?
你说是就是 Well, I can be anything you want
很美吧 真的很适合你 It is, isn't it? I know, and it's working really well for you
但也许你该重新建立形象 but all I'm saying is maybe it's time for a rebrand
你有想过剪个精灵短发吗 Have you ever thought about having a pixie cut?
没有 No
你的脸型很适合 它改变了我的人生 Oh, you have the face for it. And it's utterly changed my life
乱讲 潘 你已经很完美了 Nonsense, Pam. You're perfect just as you are
那是色妞调酒吗 Is that a Dirty Bitch?
冷静点 Steady on
快倒酒 多谢了 Oh, yes, please. Yes, thank you very much
谢了 Thanks
-来得正好 -我也要 -Just what the doctor ordered. -Me too
-拿个口哨 -给我啦 -Always. Take a horn. -Give me the fucking horn
-谢谢 -不会 -Thank you, thank you. -Yep
我该怎么办 I'll be honest, I don't know what I'd have done
这二十年来没有你们 in the past 20 years without you lot
-二十年 -三十年吧 -Twenty? -No, it's not. It's thirty?
对 应该是三十年 Yeah, it's more like 30 years, to be honest
我们玩得很开心 对吧 We've had some fucking fun though, haven't we?
没错 We have
十 九 八 Ten, nine, eight
七 六 五 seven, six, five
四 三 four, three
二 一 two, one!
新年快乐 Happy New Year!
被忘记 be forgot
从未再度想起吗 And never brought to mind?
新年快乐 Happy New Year
老朋友怎能忘记 Should auld acquaintance. Be forgot
过去的好时光 For the sake. Of auld lang syne?
快来干一杯 亲爱的 For auld lang syne, my dear
为过去的好时光 For auld lang syne
为我们的友情干一杯 We'll take a cup. Of kindness yet
为了过去的好时光 For the sake. Of auld lang syne
我忘了检查 I forgot to check
看啊 Look
晚安 Goodnight
万恶的拉链 Bloody zip
设计洋装的人都是虐待狂 Bastard tyrannical dress people
让我来 I've got it
谢谢 Thank you
新年快乐 Happy New Year
"It Isn't Perfect, But It Might Be"
剧终
I could go back to. The old place
And write your name. On every blank page
But it's a story now. Just a story now
Just the kind of thing that. You'd say
They say no need to. Look behind me
That I can keep you. Here beside me
To make a mess of it. To make the best of it
It isn't perfect. But it might be
There's a lot of ground. To cover
One foot and then the other
On my way, my way. To somewhere new
A few false starts. Can you forgive this
Cautious car and just bear with it
While it does what I thought it couldn't do
I could go back to. The old place
And write your name. On every blank page
But it's a story now. Just a story now
Just the kind of thing that. You'd say
They say no need to. Look behind me
That I can keep you. Here beside me
To make a mess of it. To make the best of it
It isn't perfect. But it might be
Mmm
Treading lightly. Thinking slightly
It just might be. It just might be
Treading lightly. Thinking slightly
It just might be. It just might be
It just might be
Oh, I can go back to. The old place
And write your name. On every blank page
But it's a story now. Just a story now
Just the kind of thing that. You'd say
That there's no need to. Look behind me
That I can keep you. Here beside me
To make a mess of it. To make the best of it
It isn't perfect. But it might be
Like it might be
Whoo, whoo
Might be, might be. Might be
"Have You Met Miss Jones?"
"Have you met Miss Jones?"
Someone said as. We shook hands
She was just Miss Jones. To me
And then I said "Miss Jones
You're a girl. Who understands
I'm a man. Who must be free"
And all at once. I lost my breath
And all at once. Was scared to death
And all at once
I owned the earth and sky
And now. I've met Miss Jones
And we'll keep on meeting til we die
Miss Jones and I
Whoa, fellas
And all at once. I lost my breath
And all at once. Was scared to death
And all at once
I owned the earth and sky
Now I've met Miss Jones
And we'll keep on meeting til we die
Miss Jones and I
Ha!