以下电影取材自真实故事 只有人物、地点及事件有所改动
〔曾经，在有线电视诞生前〕 There was a time, a time before cable,
〔当地主播盛行一时〕 when the local anchorman reigned supreme,
〔人们深信在电视上所听到的一切〕 when people believed everything they heard on TV.
〔那时代，只有男人被允许关注时势新闻〕 This was an age when only men were allowed to read the news.
〔在圣地亚哥 出现一个主播，是男人中的男人〕 And in San Diego, one anchorman was more man than the rest.
〔他的名字叫--威博根狄〕 His name was Ron Burgundy.
〔他像一个穿越凡间的神〕 He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals.
〔他的声音能让豺狼变得温顺〕 He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr,
〔同时又衣着光鲜〕 and suits so fine
〔任何人比下去都像个难民〕 they made Sinatra look like a hobo.
换句话说，威博根狄是个充满雄风的人 In other words, Ron Burgundy was the balls.
我看来不错 Mmm. I look good.
我是说，真的不错 I mean, really good.
嗨，各位！看看我有多不错！ Hey, everyone! Come and see how good I look!
【抢闸男主播】
Mm, ehh, mm.
排骨，午餐吃了排骨，所以才这样做 Ribs. I had ribs for lunch. That's why I'm doing this.
掘金掘骨掘鸡骨 How now brown cow. How now brown cow.
掘金掘骨掘鸡骨 How now brown cow.
你好吗？你今晚看起来好极了？ How are you? You look awfully nice tonight. Hmm?
也许下次别戴围罩更好 Maybe don't wear a bra next time.
不，我在和你说话，不，不是她 No, I was talking to you. No, not her.
我不知道她名字，是什么？ I don't know her name. What is it?
兰诺伦？ Lanolin?
兰...兰诺伦？像懒佬鞋？ La-lanolin? Like sheep's wool?
独特的纽约 Unique New York.
我喜欢苏格兰威士忌 Mm, I love Scotch.
我喜欢苏格兰威士忌 苏格兰，苏格兰，苏格兰 I love Scotch. Scotchy, Scotch, Scotch.
我要喝了 Here it goes down.
喝进肚子里，唔，唔，唔 Down into my belly. Mm-mm-mm.
纵火犯有双古怪的脚 The arsonist has oddly shaped feet.
还有多少时间？30？30秒？ How much time? 30? 30 seconds?
- 你直播了 - 我在直播了？ - You are on. - I'm on right now?
我不相信你 I don't believe you.
威！ - # Doo doo doo. # - Ron!
不是吧，奥德丽 Oh, come on. Audrey.
我看起来很差，我有眼袋 I look like hell. I got bags under my eyes.
什么？若妳是男人 What's that? If you were a man,
我就一拳打在妳嘴上 I'd punch you right in the mouth.
那是草丛，草丛联盟 That's bush. Bush league.
纵火犯被银行拒绝贷款 The human torch was denied a bank loan.
妳听到我说吗？奥德丽，看看我！ You hear me? Audrey, look at me!
对不起 I'm sorry.
好吗？对不起 All right? I'm sorry.
Ha ha! Ha ha ha ho!
Ha ha ho.
Ha oh!
好吧，我们直播了 All right, we're on.
准备，菲尔 Ready, Phil.
开始倒数，5、4... We're on in five, four...
〔当时钟停留在6:00〕 When the clock struck 6:00,
〔对威博根狄来说〕 it meant one thing for Ron Burgundy
〔他的新闻组要表演了〕 and his news team: Go time.
第4频道新闻报导 Channel 4 News,
曾获5届《艾美奖》的优胜主播 with five-time Emmy award-winning anchor
威博根狄 Ron Burgundy.
冠军佬--体育 Champ Kind, sports.
Ooh! Hoo-hoo!
砖头添--天气 Brick Tamland, weather.
还有你的实地记者--高贵芬 And your reporter in the field, Brian Fantana.
这里是第4频道6:00新闻报导 It's Channel 4 News at 6:00.
晚安，我是威博根狄 Good evening. I'm Ron Burgundy,
以下是今晚发生在你周围的事情 and this is what's happening in your world tonight.
在一个废弃泳池 A La Jolla man clings to life at a university hospital
一名老人被一群野狗恶意袭击 after being viciously attacked by a pack of wild dogs
现于大学医院重伤垂危 in an abandoned pool.
嗨，各位！他妈的收声！威博根狄出镜了！ Hey, everybody! Shut the hell up! Ron Burgundy's on!
当局仍未清楚为何那名男子... Authorities are still uncertain as to why the man
- 为何游荡... - 威博根狄 - was loitering... - Ron Burgundy.
我的天！她开口说话了！ Oh, my gosh! She said her first words!
现在城市温度是82° Right now it's 82' in our fair city,
西北地区48° and compare that to 48' in the upper Northwest
中东部地区38° and 38' in the Middle East.
昨天，坦帕海湾沿岸地区 Off the coast of Tampa Bay yesterday,
一名幸运的摄影师有幸拍摄到 one lucky cameraman happened to catch
一个非比寻常的水上勇者 an unusual aquatic daredevil.
以下将会看到的是第4频道独家新闻 What you're about to see is a Channel 4 News exclusive.
牠的名字叫坚果松鼠 His name is Nutty the Squirrel,
牠三岁 and he's three years old.
感觉如何？ How 'bout that?
那松鼠会滑水 That squirrel can water-ski.
- 真疯狂 - 对，不错 - Man, that's hilarious. - Yeah, that's good.
第4频道新闻组多谢各位收睇 For all of us here at News Center 4,
我是威博根狄 I'm Ron Burgundy.
保持漂亮的圣地亚哥 You stay classy, San Diego.
各位听着，上个月的收视率到了 Listen up. The ratings just came in for last month.
我们是第一，各项统计指标都第一 We are number one. We just grabbed every key demographic.
- 超-级-劲，兄弟！ - 好！好！ - Super-duper, gang! - Yeah! Yeah!
超-级-劲！真是太好了！ Super-duper! That's nice!
做得好！极好，兄弟 Way to go! Neat-o, gang.
- 好！ - 爱德 - Yes! - Boy, Ed.
老实说，这是个好消息 That is good news. I gotta be honest.
- 恭喜，恭喜 - 是个好消息！ - Congrats, congrats. - That is good news!
- 好的！ - 注意 - All right! - Stick around.
别让这些人玩得太癫 Make sure these guys don't party too much.
- 他们从不听我说 - 记得啊 - They don't really ever listen to me. - Just get it done.
各位先生女仕，请注意 Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention?
刚有个紧急消息 I've just been handed an urgent
惊人的消息 and horrifying news story.
我要所有人暂停所有事情 I need all of you to stop what you're doing
听我说 and listen.
炮弹来了！ Cannonball!
〔是的，这些家伙真是新闻组成员〕 Yes, these fellas were a real news team.
〔博根狄，当然，是中流砥柱，奠基石〕 Burgundy, of course, was the foundation, the rock.
〔但每个成员都各有特质互相平衡〕 But each member brought their own special something to the equation.
人们都叫我“型人” People call me the Bri-man.
我是组里最时髦的 I'm the stylish one of the group.
我知妳心里想问什么 I know what you're asking yourself,
答案是有的，我为我的阴茎改了绰号 and the answer is yes, I have a nickname for my penis.
叫做“八角形” It's called the Octagon.
我的睪丸也有绰号 But I also nicknamed my testes.
左边的叫“占士威斯福教授” My left one is James Westfall,
右边的叫“简尼夫箂斯禾达博士” and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater.
若妳是喜欢玩纸牌女仕们 妳会有机会看到我全副架生的 You ladies play your cards right, you might get to meet the whole gang.
他们在放电 Bang, boom, they were showing lasers
每周五晚上 every Friday night.
我是冠军，我喜爱找欢乐 Champ here. I'm all about havin' fun.
喝几杯鸡尾酒 You know, get a couple of cocktails in me,
在别人的厨房放火 start a fire in someone's kitchen.
或者去海洋世界脱裤 Maybe go to SeaWorld, take my pants off.
怎样也好，我开始薄有名气 Anyway, I've become kind of famous
我的个人口号是“诅咒！” for my signature catchphrase, "Whammy!"
就像拿着两张同花牌 As in, "Gene Tenace at the plate...
然后说“诅咒！” and whammy!"
“诅咒！” Whammy!
我叫砖头添 I'm Brick Tamland.
人们喜欢我是因为我有礼貌 People seem to like me because I am polite
而且很守时 and I'm rarely late.
我喜欢吃雪糕 I like to eat ice cream,
我也很喜欢穿便裤 and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks.
一年后，医生会告诉我 Years later, a doctor will tell me
我的智商只有48 that I have an lQ of 48
就像人们常说的 and am what some people call
“智障” "mentally retarded."
哈啰！ Hello!
- 马可！ - 勃罗！ - Whoo! Marco! - Polo!
- 高贵 - 玩得开心吗？ - Brian. - You having a good time?
- 我玩得很开心 - 我也是 - I'm having a great time. - That makes two of us.
你要认识这女孩 You've gotta meet this girl.
她曾是拉拉队长，但她弄伤了盆骨 She used to be a Charger cheerleader, but she broke her pelvis.
雪莉，他是威博根狄 Sherri, meet Ron Burgundy.
- 嗨，威 - 哈啰 - Hey, Ron. - Hello.
我有大新闻告诉你 - I've got a big story for you. - Mm-hmm.
就在这里 And it's right here.
哈啰！ Well, hello.
妳在指自己对大波波 You pointed to your boobies.
我的天，是啊！ Oh, my God, you did!
- 威博根狄？ - 是的？ - Ron Burgundy? - Yes?
我在小时候就迷上你了 I have had a crush on you since I was a little girl.
我们换个地方吧 Let's go somewhere.
这真是最好不过了 I'm telling you, it don't get no better than this.
12年来我们都参加过这样的派对 We've been coming to the same party for 12 years,
不该压抑自己的 and in no way is that depressing.
Ahh.
要自己找到触电的感觉 # Gonna make our own lightning #
对，她能打动我，樱桃 # Yeah, she got the way to move me, Cherry #
她能令我快活 # She got the way to groove me #
樱桃，宝贝 # Cherry, baby #
她能打动我 # She got the way to move me #
她能令我快活... # She got the way to groove me... #
以宙斯的胡子之名！ By the beard of Zeus!
失陪 Excuse me.
威，你要去哪？什么，你疯了吗？威！ Ron, where you going? What, are you crazy? Ron!
若你到达底线，记得要回本垒！ If you're coming down the baseline, you gotta take home plate from me!
所以我去了，先是头 So there I go, head first, boom!
我找不到她 I've lost her.
噢 Ohh.
哈啰 Hello.
希望没打扰妳，但... Hope I'm not disturbing you, but, uh,
我看见妳在人群穿插，所以... I saw you from across the party, and, uh,
我通常不会这样，但我觉得必须告诉妳 I don't usually do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something.
妳有... You have...
倾倒众生的 an absolutely breathtaking...
臀部 heinie.
我指，那十分好 I mean, that thing is good.
所以想和它交个朋友 I want to be friends with it.
显然你很会讨女人欢心 Well, you certainly know how to compliment a woman.
现在，我要失陪 Now, if you'll excuse me.
你知我是谁吗？ Do you know who I am?
不，我不知道 No, I can't say that I do.
我不知该怎说 I don't know how to put this,
但我是个大人物 but I'm kind of a big deal.
真的？ Really?
大家都认识我 People know me.
真为你高兴 I've very happy for you.
我是十分重要的人物 I'm very important.
我有... I have...
很多精装藏书 many leather-bound books,
和我的公寓 and my apartment
充满有钱的桃花气息 smells of rich mahogany.
这真乏味 That's stupid.
不，不，那...很令人兴奋 No, no, that's... very exciting.
听着，我可否... Listen, can l--
重新来过？ can I start over again?
当然 Sure.
我想坦白地说一件事 I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there.
若妳喜欢，那就好了 If you like it, you can take it.
若妳不喜欢，就当什么也没发生 If you don't, send it right back.
Mm-hmm.
我想干妳 I wanna be on you.
等等 等，等，等，等，等，等 Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
我... I--
我想干妳 I wanna be on you.
Yoo-hoo!
巴斯特！ Baxter!
爸爸回来了 Papa's home.
你在这里，你是我的小孩子 There he is. There's my little man.
你还好吧？ You're okay?
是的，我今晚遇到一位女仕 Of course I met a lady tonight.
老实说，她很与众不同 This one was different. I have to be honest.
简直颠倒众生 Quite different.
什么... What--
我很孤独？我不孤独！ I'm lonely? I'm not lonely!
我受圣地亚哥每个人爱戴 I'm beloved by everyone in San Diego.
哗 Wow.
你懂得令我心碎，巴斯特 You know how to cut to the core of me, Baxter.
你真聪明 You're so wise.
就像个小佛祖 You're like a miniature Buddha
但有毛的 covered in hair.
说多次？ Come again?
你知我不懂西班牙文的，说英文 You know I don't speak Spanish. In English, please.
哦？ Huh?
你在雪柜里痾了屎？ You pooped in the refrigerator?
还吃了整件芝士？ And you ate a whole wheel of cheese?
你怎能这样做？ How'd you do that?
我不会生气，真令人吃惊 I'm not even mad. That's amazing.
我原谅你 I forgive you.
不若让我替你穿睡衣，再铺些干草？ What do you say we get you in your pj's and hit the hay?
该睡觉了，好的，来吧，去睡 Bedtime. Okay, come on. Let's go. Come on.
真是个疯狂的派对 Oh, that was one crazy party.
我很疲倦 I am hung over.
我今早起床 I woke up this morning
好吧各位，注意 All right, guys. Let's focus up.
早晨，各位 Morning, everyone.
这些是今天要追访的新闻 Here are the stories we're going to be chasing today.
好像是王玲 It looks like Ling Wong,
圣地亚哥动物园珍贵的熊猫怀了孕 the rare panda at the San Diego Zoo, is pregnant.
这是大新闻 This is a big one.
可能是这夏天最大的新闻 This could be the big story of the summer.
《广播网》将会大肆报导 Network is gonna be wanting plenty of coverage.
提起《广播网》，有小道消息传出 And speaking of network, word on the street is
他们正在寻找新主播 they're looking for a new anchor.
- 所以，威... - 什么？《广播网》？ - So, Ron... - Huh? Network?
他们来了？ Are they here?
你们该听到有成员抱怨 A lot of you have been hearing the affiliates complaining
新闻组缺少差异性 about a lack of diversity on the news team.
什么是他妈的“差异性”？ What in the hell's diversity?
我或许会错 Well, I could be wrong,
我想差异性是内战时期使用的 but I believe diversity is an old, old wooden ship
一种很旧很旧的木船 that was used during the Civil War era.
若有成员对缺乏一艘旧木船而 I would be surprised if the affiliates were concerned
因此感到忧虑，我会很惊讶 about the lack of an old wooden ship,
但那是很好的尝试 but nice try.
差异性是指时代在不断改变 Diversity means that times are changing,
有了这个观念... and with that in mind--
- 威，你在留心吗？ - 不 - Ron, are you paying attention? - Nope.
- 这关系到大家的 - 好吧 - This concerns all of us. - Okay.
好好记着，我为大家介绍一位新成员 Keeping that in mind, I'd like to introduce the latest addition
加入《KVWN新闻组》 to the KVWN News Team,
来自《WYPN》 directly from WYPN
北卡罗来纳州的艾西维尔市 in Asheville, North Carolina,
花女歌宁史东小姐 Ms. Veronica Corningstone.
- 那淑女是谁？ - 哈啰 - # Who's that lady? # - Hello.
- 那淑女是谁... - 哈啰，各位 - # Who's that lady... # - Hello, everyone.
- 噢！ - 我想告诉大家 - Oh! - I just want you all to know
我很期待能为这间早已 that I look forward to contributing
享负盛名的新闻电台出一分力 to this news station's already sterling reputation.
不是吧，爱德！这真离谱！ I mean, come on, Ed! It's bullcrap!
别误解，我很喜欢女仕们 Don't get me wrong. I love the ladies.
她们是我的动力，但她们不属于新闻界！ They rev my engine, but they don't belong in the newsroom!
主播是男人的工作，不是女人的工作！ It is anchorman, not anchorlady!
这是科学事实！ - And that is a scientific fact! - Uh-huh.
我不知我们在争吵什么！ I don't know what we're yelling about!
威，你怎样看？ Ron, what do you think?
她...她...太可怕了！ She-- sh-- it's terrible!
她有对美丽的眼睛 她的头发散发着桂花香！ She has beautiful eyes, and her hair smells like cinnamon!
Mm-hmm.
嘈吵的声音！ Loud noises!
好吧，各位放松，她不会抢任何人的风头 All right, everyone relax. She's not gonna take anyone's airtime.
我在某处看过，她们经期会吸引熊 I read somewhere that their periods attract bears.
熊能闻出月经 Bears can smell the menstruation.
那太好了，听到吗，爱德？ Well, that's just great. You hear that, Ed?
熊啊，现在你把整个电台陷入危机之中 Bears. Now you're putting the whole station in jeopardy.
我会为她说一句话，爱德 I will say one thing for her, Ed,
她有一个漂亮迷人的背影 she does have a nice, big old behind.
我很想在她的屁股涂上烧烤酱 I'd like to put some barbecue sauce on that butt
然后咬，咬，咬，咬！嚼，嚼，嚼！ and just bite, bite, bite, bite, munch, munch, munch!
- 呀-噢！ - 停吧！我的天 - Ah-whoo! - Stop it! Oh, Jeez.
看这有如圆月的屁股！ Look at the full-moon butt!
Champ! Champ! Champ, Champ!
哈根先生，我想知道 Mr. Harken, I was just wondering
你知我的办公室何时才准备好吗？ if you knew when my office would be ready.
那需要一段时间 Well, that might take some time.
现在，妳不如随便找张书台？ For now, why don't you just grab a desk in the bullpen?
妳可以用我的办公室！然后我们一起午餐！ You can use my office! Then afterwards maybe we can go to lunch!
细声点，威 Lower your voice, Ron.
Mm-hmm!
好的，谢谢，哈根先生 All right. Thank you, Mr. Harken.
我去整理我的书台 I'll go get my desk set up.
她是个俏丽的妈妈！我可以... Oh, she is a saucy mama! I mean, I would...
又来了 Here we go again.
每个电台都是一样 Every station it's the same.
女仕们问我，我是怎能忍受这一切 Women ask me how I put up with it.
事实上，我别无选择 Well, the truth is, I don't really have a choice.
这完全是男人的世界 This is definitely a man's world.
但当他们在嘲笑和抽水时 But while they're laughing and grab-assing,
我可以迎头赶上 I'm chasing down leads
不断练习本地口音 and practicing my nonregional diction.
因为唯一要赢的方法就是做到最好 Because the only way to win is to be the best.
极之好 The very best.
两难的局面 Touchy situation.
我想对付歌宁史东最好的办法是 I think the best thing to do with this Corningstone,
让她排队，搞她上床 to keep her in line, is bed her quick.
要她排队我会等到精神错乱！ Oh, that behind is driving me loco!
我就像一匹夜狼 I'm like a night wolf.
各位，放松点，请放松点！ Guys, take it easy. Just take it easy!
- 她也是人啊 - 我的天！ - She's got feelings, too. - Oh, my God!
听到博根狄怎说吗 Listen to Burgundy.
他定是想软化我们，像他妈的纯情学生 He's gone soft on us, like some schoolboy bitch.
你有点同性恋味道 You sound like a gay.
别这样吧！ Hey! Come on!
是我，老头子博根狄，明白吧？ It's me, Papa Burgundy, all right?
我一直在担心，这歌宁史东的公平竞争 As far as I'm concerned, Corningstone's fair game.
让游戏开始吧！ Huh? Let the games begin!
Hi-ohhh!
这才是他，这才是他 There he is. There he is.
我大受鼓舞 I'm very aroused.
这是什么？ What's this?
Well, well, well.
威博根狄和他的第4频道新闻组 Ron Burgundy and the Channel 4 News Team.
哈啰，西哥文 Hello, Wes Mantooth.
哈啰，晚间新闻组 Hello, Evening News Team.
衣服很漂亮啊，各位 Nice clothes, gentlemen.
我不知救世军有大减价呢 I didn't know the Salvation Army was having a sale.
不是吗？看看他们 Am I right? Look at these guys.
你们从哪里找到这些衣服？ Hey, where did you get those clothes?
厕所店铺？ At the toilet store?
你们来我们的报导场地干吗，博根狄？ What are you doing on our station's turf, Burgundy?
你想来打架吗？ You're about to get a serious beat-down.
我会把你的脸为挡风玻璃抹窗 I will smash your face into a car windshield
然后再约你妈妈多菲文出去 and then take your mother, Dorothy Mantooth,
吃一顿海鲜晚餐，再把她飞掉 out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again!
多菲文很神圣！你明白吗？ Dorothy Mantooth is a saint! You understand me?
- 多菲文很神圣！ - 嗨 - Dorothy Mantooth is a saint! - Hey.
各位请唔提老母，好以吗？ Leave the mothers out of this, all right?
没这必要 It's unnecessary.
此外，我肯定西哥也在 Besides, I'm sure Wes here
为收视率第二(痾屎)而感到不高兴 is just upset over finishing second in the ratings again.
噢！ Ooh!
这绝对不值一提，博根狄 That's completely uncalled for, Burgundy.
那些收视率调查体制错漏百出 You know those rating systems are flawed.
他们没有计算 They don't take into account houses that have
有些人是有两架电视或类似情况 more than two television sets and other things of that nature.
我想我该重复刚才的说话 I guess I have to take you at your word,
第二(痾屎吧) Number Two.
祝今天过得愉快，朋友 You have a great day, fellas.
受挫折时再见 We'll see you around the bend.
杂种！ Son of a bitch!
借过，第二(痾屎吧) Excusez-moi, Numero Two.
博根狄 Hey, Burgundy.
收视率观众抽样人数太少了！ You know those sample audiences aren't big enough!
别躲在那些隐藏数据后面 博根狄！我会嬴的！ Stop hiding behind those phony numbers, Burgundy! I'm coming after you!
我恨你，威博根狄，我恨你！ I hate you, Ron Burgundy. I hate you!
你不能帮帮口吗？ You can't say one word?
就算白痴也懂得帮口吧！ Even the guy who can't think says something!
你们就这样站着？不是吧！ You guys just stand there? Come on!
对，我想我儿子只是在经历某个阶段 Right, but I think my son is just going through a phase.
我不知道他在哪里 I have no idea where
得到那些德国人色情杂志 he would have gotten ahold of German pornography.
但妳和我都是成年人 But you and l are mature adults.
我们都已看过色情杂志中的素材 We've both seen our share of pornographic materials.
妳从来没有？ Oh, you never have?
妳当然没有，我真蠢，我也没有 Of course you haven't, how stupid of me. Neither have l.
我只是说普通那种 I was just speaking in generalities.
我稍后会到学校拜访，玛嘉烈修女，再见 I'll stop by the school a little later, Sister Margaret. Bye.
爱德，她坚持要进来 Ed, she insisted on coming in.
敬爱的，哈根先生 Mr. Harken, sir,
我在这电台的第一单新闻报导 I will not have my first story at this news station
不能是猫时装表演 be about a cat fashion show.
敬爱的，歌宁史东小姐 Miss Corningstone, ma'am,
妳必须完成被委派的新闻 you will do the stories to which you are assigned.
哈根先生，我是个他妈的出色新闻工作者 Mr. Harken, I am a damn good journalist,
猫时装表演真是一级荒谬 and this cat show thing is grade-A baloney.
不是荒谬，现在就去工作，小姐！ It is not baloney. Now, go do your job, missy!
这是荒谬！ It is baloney!
威 Hey, Ron,
我要对新来的女孩作出行动了 I'm gonna take a run at the new girl.
开始游戏吧 Let the games begin.
冠军，冠军，我们不是真的这样做吧 Oh, Champ, Champ, we're not really gonna actually do that.
- 我们只是吹吹水 - 是吗 - We were just flapping our gums. - Oh, yeah.
你杀了我吧，博根狄 You kill me, Burgundy.
让我拿这东西，对不起 Let me just grab this. Oh, sorry about that.
诅咒 - Whammy. - Hmm.
- 哦，冠军？ - 什么？ - Uh, Champ? - Yeah.
你想摸我的胸部，对吗？ You're trying to touch my breasts, aren't you?
我能说什么？我喜欢妳对咪咪 What can I say? I like the way you're put together.
妳应为我们去约会如何？ What do you say we go out on a date?
吃些鸡，或者上床 Have some chicken, maybe some sex.
看看能否合得来？ You know, see what happens?
让我拿那边的东西 Oh, let me get this over here.
对不起 Sorry.
拿到了 Oh, there it is.
我会给这小曲奇多一个小时 I'll give this little cookie an hour
然后开始跳下身裸体舞 before we're doing the no-pants dance.
喷喷时间到 Time to musk up.
哇 Wow.
你总是让我吃惊 It never ceases to amaze me.
你要用哪枝古龙水？ What cologne you gonna go with?
伦敦绅士，或者... London Gentleman, or--
等等，不，不，不，等等 wait. No, no, no. Hold on.
黑胡须之愉快 Blackbeard's Delight.
不，对她要用特别的 No, she gets a special cologne.
这叫做剧院的性感之豹 It's called Sex Panther by Odeon.
有九个国家是禁用的 It's illegal in nine countries.
它是采用一些黑豹做原料 Yep, it's made with bits of real panther.
- 是珍品 - 有点刺激性 - So you know it's good. - It's quite pungent.
对 Oh yeah.
这是令人敬畏的香味 It's a formidable scent.
能够刺激鼻孔 It stings the nostrils.
- 在好的方面 - 对 - In a good way. - Yep.
老实说，闻起来像无铅汽油 I'll be honest with you. That smells like pure gasoline.
他们做过研究的 They've done studies, you know.
有60%机会能发挥作用 60% of the time, it works every time.
这没道理 That doesn't make sense.
好吧 Well...
去看看能否让猫儿也动情 Iet's go see if we can make this little kitty purr.
嗨，甜姐儿，能接受我的邀请吗 Hey, sweet cheeks. Got an invite I'd like to extend your way.
我的天 My God.
什么气味？ What is that smell?
噢！ -Oh!
这是欲望的气息，小姐 That's the smell of desire, milady.
天，不，闻起来像... God, no, it smells like--
吃过印度菜后痾过的尿布 Iike a used diaper filled with lndian food.
失陪 Oh! Excuse me.
有些人对欲望的气息会那样 Desire smells like that to some people.
那是什么？闻起来像一堆烧焦头发的粪便 What is that? Smells like a turd covered in burnt hair!
闻起来像大脚八的老二！ It smells like Bigfoot's dick!
噢，该死，真是臭气熏天！ Oh, hell, that's rank!
什么气味？ Oh, what's that smell?
这比为浣熊洗澡还呕心 This is worse than the time the raccoon got in the copier.
对啊 Yeah.
这会令人分散注意力的 It's very distracting.
当我们到达宠物店时 - When we get to the pet shop-- - Cough!
看那里 Look over here.
打扰妳，花女 Excuse me, Veronica.
是的，什么事，砖头？ Yes, what is it, Brick?
我想邀请妳 I would like to extend to you
参加短裤派对 an invitation to the pants party.
什么？ Excuse me?
派对，短裤... The party. The pants--
有短裤，派对上有短裤？ With the pants. Party with pants?
砖头，你是说 Brick, are you saying
你的短裤里在开派对，然后邀请我？ that there's a party in your pants and I'm invited?
正是 That's it.
是高贵叫你这样说的，砖头？ Hmm. Did Brian tell you to say this, Brick?
不...是，没错 No-- yes, he did.
明白，不，我不会去你短裤里的派对 Okay. No, I don't want to go to a party in your pants.
很好 依仁？ Very well. Ian?
你愿意参加我短裤里的派对吗？ Would you like to go to a party in my pants?
不，砖头 No, Brick.
好吧， 我们起行！ All right. Let's go!
好的，我没事... All right, now...
她是个真正的波中之霸 I'm telling you, she is a real ball-buster.
真正的冰山美人 A real ice queen.
我刚灼伤我的舌头 Mm. I just burned my tongue.
要征服这种经典女人 The only way to bag a classy lady
是要给她展现些雄风的 is to give her two tickets to the gun show...
看她是否喜欢我的“双鎗” and see if she likes the goods.
1,001 1,001.
1,002 1,002.
- 博根狄先生？ - 1,003 - Uh, Mr. Burgundy? - 1,003.
海伦说你找我？ Helen said that you needed to see me?
歌宁史东女仕 Oh, Miss Corningstone.
我不知会有客人 I wasn't expecting company.
我只是在健身 Just doing my workout.
周二是做手臂及背肌 Tuesday's arms and back.
- 你要我过来的 - 我有吗？ - You asked me to come by, sir. - Oh, did l?
是的 Yes.
脂肪在燃烧！ Oh, it's the deep burn!
彻底地燃烧 Oh, it's so deep.
我的右手有点痛，刚才运动过度了 I can barely lift my right arm 'cause I did so many.
我不知妳刚才听到没有，我做超过1,000下 I don't know if you heard me counting. I did over 1,000.
你有强健的肌肉 You have your ubulus muscle
那是连接上臂和肩膀 that connects to the upper dorsinus.
这很闷，但是我生活的一部分 It's boring, but it's part of my life.
若妳不介意，我想先穿回衣服 I'm just gonna grab this shirt, if you don't mind.
小心我的“双鎗”，他们很危险的 Just watch out for the guns. They'll get you.
你真可悲 You are pathetic.
这是我遇过最 This has to be the feeblest
差劲的意图沟女方式了 pickup attempt that I have ever encountered.
我知他们会很差劲 但我曾以为你不是，博根狄先生 I expected it from the rest of them, Mr. Burgundy, but not from you.
等等！妳说我...意图？ Wait a minute! I-- pickup attempt?
我觉得被冒犯了 I'm offended.
我只是没有时间去健身 I have little time to get to the gym,
所以要在办公室里锻炼我的“双鎗” so I have to sculpt my guns at the office.
请别再说你的肌肉是“双鎗”了 Oh, stop calling your arms "guns."
听着 Look.
我原本是想问妳 My plan was to ask you
我能否陪伴妳在镇里逛逛 if I could squire you about town
以一个专业人仕帮另一个专业人仕 as one professional helping another professional,
因为我知到一个新城市是会感到寂寞 because I know what it's like to be lonely in a new city.
- 真的？ - 是 - Really? - Yes.
但我现在受了伤 But now I am too hurt.
和震惊和被人种伤 And shocked and offended
而且...受了伤 and-- and hurt.
我想去 I could do that.
真的？ Really?
是的 Well, yes.
作为一个新闻工作者，我该认识 As a journalist, I should get to know
我将要报导的城市 the city that I'm covering.
- 但这不是约会 - 不，当然不是 - But this is not a date. - No, of course not.
- 纯粹为了专业 - 好极 - Strictly professional. - Wonderful.
太好了 - Hmm. - Great.
我去接妳吗 Shall I pick you up
8:00?
Mm, 9:00.
楼下？ Downstairs?
博根狄先生，你完全勃起了 Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection.
真的？ Really?
是，是啊 Yes, I do. Um...
对不起，这是... I'm sorry, it's the--
这只是裤子褶起了 - it's the pleats. - Mm.
其实只是一种视觉上的错觉 It's actually an optical illusion.
是裤子的款式 It's the pattern on the pants.
在胯部没有展平 It's not flattering in the crotchal region.
我现在就把它弄好 I'm actually taking them back right now.
把它们放回原位 Taking them back to the pants store.
这真尴尬 Oh, this is awkward.
待会再见 and I will see you later.
别装作不钦敬 Don't act like you're not impressed.
现在别再看我了 Frame up two.
我们回到高贵芬的现场... - Let's go to Brian Fantana live... - Gimme a tighter one on two.
第4频道新闻独家新闻 ...with a Channel 4 News exclusive.
高贵？ Brian?
观赏熊猫，气氛有点紧张 Panda watch. The mood is tense.
我曾报导过不少大新闻 I have been on some serious, serious reports,
但都比上这单 but nothing like this.
我...我...要入去看个究竟 I-- l-- Ching-- King is inside now.
我想做个采访，但他们说：「你不能 I tried to get an interview, but they said, "You can't.
牠是只活生生的熊，他会撕烂你的脸」 He's a live bear. He will literally rip your face off."
你让我看来像傻瓜！ Hey! You're making me look stupid!
走开吧！贱熊猫！ Get out here! Panda jerk!
很好的报导，注目又充实 Great story. Compelling and rich.
第4频道新闻组多谢各位收睇 That's gonna do it for all of us at Channel 4 News.
保持漂亮的圣地亚哥 You stay classy, San Diego.
我是威博根狄？ I'm Ron Burgundy?
该死！谁在讲词上打了问号？ Damn it! Who typed a question mark on the Teleprompter?
最后警告，你们在讲词上的东西 For the last time, anything you put on that prompter,
博根狄会念出来的 Burgundy will read.
天，这是个错误 Oh, God, this is a mistake.
是个错误 This is a mistake.
他很可爱，很可爱，不，他不是，他多毛 He's very cute. Very cute. No, he's not. He's hairy.
她来了！花女！ There she is! Veronica!
我的陶瓷娃娃 My little China doll.
我今晚很充实 I am full of it tonight.
这很蠢，嗨 Oh, silly. Hi.
妳很迷人 You look ravishing.
我们真像美女与野兽 It truly is beauty and the beast.
我该加上“英俊”的野兽两字 I might add a handsome beast at that.
妳准备好我们的约会吗？ Are you ready for our rendezvous?
这不是约会 It's not a date.
不是，纯粹专业 No, strictly professional.
但不代表，不能玩得开心 Doesn't mean we can't have fun.
- 可以走吧？ - 是的 - Shall we? - Yes.
圣地亚哥 San Diego.
好像美酒 Mm! Drink it in.
那般的香醇 It always goes down smooth.
美丽的景色啊，博根狄先生 What a beautiful view, Mr. Burgundy.
我知，我爱这城市，这是... I know. I love this city. It's a--
这是事实 it's a fact.
是人类史上最伟大的城市 It's the greatest city in the history of mankind.
德国人在1904年发现这里 Discovered by the Germans in 1904.
他们命名为圣地亚哥 They named it San Diago,
德文的意思是指鲸鱼的阴道 which of course in German means a whale's vagina.
不，这不会是事实 N-- no, there's no way that's correct.
对不起，我只想令妳铭记于心 I'm sorry. I was trying to impress you.
噢 Oh.
我不知它的含义 I don't know what it means.
老实说，我认为没人再知道这典故 I'll be honest. I don't think anyone knows what it means anymore.
学者研究认为典故在 Scholars maintain that the translation was lost
百多年前失传了 hundreds of years ago.
是不是解作神圣的地牙哥？ Doesn't it mean Saint Diego?
不，不 No. No.
不，那是...那就是它的含义 No, that's-- that's what it means.
真的 Really.
同意妳的不同见解 Well, agree to disagree.
我可为你落单吗？ May I take your order?
是的，我要三份苏格兰威士忌 Yes, I am going to have three fingers of Glenlivet
加点胡椒粉，还要一些芝士 with a little bit of pepper, and, uh, some cheese.
好的 Very good.
我要一份曼克顿和一份苦艾酒 A Manhattan, and kick the vermouth
旁边加双铁鞋 in the side with a pair of steel-toed boots.
- 当然的 - 谢谢，史葛 - Certainly. - Thank you, Scott.
谢谢 Thank you.
喝得很特别啊 Wow. Quite a drink order.
身在罗马(入乡随俗) Oh, well, when in Rome.
什么？ Yes?
请继续 Please, go on.
你指入乡随俗？ Uh, do as the Romans do?
这是古老的谚语 It's an old expression.
我从未听过 Oh! I've never heard of it.
- 噢 - 很好，我想 - Oh. - It's wonderful, though.
博根狄先生 Mr. Burgundy.
- 天奴！你好吗？ - 很高兴见到你 - Tino! How are you? - So good to see you.
你看来神采飞扬 You're looking fantastic.
天奴 花女 Tino, Veronica.
花女，你的女友真漂亮 Veronica. What a pretty girlfriend.
- 来，饮品我请客 - 不，不，不 - Drinks are on Tino tonight. - No, no, no.
我们是同事，我们在同一电台工作 We're work associates. I work at the station.
- 我是个新闻工作者 - 好的，他是个好人 - I'm a journalist. - Oh, okay. This is a good guy.
天奴拥有这城市最好的俱乐部 Tino's the finest club owner in the city.
- 对吗，我的好友？ - 对 - My best friend, right? - Yes.
我家乡有种说法形容他这种人 Yes, we have a saying in my country about people like him.
“总爱猎食年幼的心 "The coyote of the desert
以血来喂孩子吃早、午、晚三餐 always likes to eat the heart of the young,
只有肋骨断开两截之 where the blood drips down to children for breakfast, lunch and dinner,
- 沙漠中的土狼” - 天奴 - only the ribs will be broken in two." - Tino.
好的，博根狄先生，若你愿意为我们 Okay. Well, Mr. Burgundy, we will be honored
用爵士萧演奏一曲，我们会很荣幸 if you will play "yazz" flute for us.
- 我不能 - 求求你 - I can't. - Please.
你懂吹爵士萧？ You play jazz flute?
- 只是门外汉 - 噢 - I dabble. - Oh.
大家想听威博根狄吹爵士萧吗？ Would everyone love to hear Ron Burgundy play "yazz" flute?
- 吹奏一曲吧，小威 - 对！有请 - Get it goin', Ronnie! - Yes! Please.
你啊，请上台吧 You, on stage now.
好，我想能吹首歌谣吧 Okay, I guess I can play a little ditty.
- 老实说，我... - 来吧 - Honestly, I'm-- - Come on.
- 请鼓掌 - 我一点准备都没有啊 - Give him a hand. - I'm not prepared. Not at all.
- 好啊！ - 真是令人惊喜 - Yeah! - This is a surprise, I'll tell you.
各位，“东哈林临时的地铺”，E调好吗？ Guys, "East Harlem Shakedown," E flat?
保持钹声 Keep the cymbals splashy,
积，以低音伴奏 and, Jay, let's take the bass line for a walk.
继续 Hold on.
还未可以，继续 I'm not hearing it right. Hold on.
准备好了，全对 We got it now. It's all right.
开始吧，小威！ Fire up, Ronnie!
微不足道的曲谣为你送上，希望你准备好 Little "Ham and Eggs" comin' at you. Hope you got your griddles.
小儿科献丑，就是这一首 That's baby-makin' music, that's what that is.
来了！ Let's go!
我是水肺！ Hey, Aqualung!
谢谢 Thank you.
谢谢！ Thank you!
你真不可思议 You were amazing.
谢谢 Mm. Thank you.
你在哪学到这级功力？ Where did you learn to play like that?
爵士萧 Well, jazz flute
一向是我生活中的小激情 has always been a small passion of mine.
那么你还有什么激情，博根狄先生？ So what other passions do you have, Mr. Burgundy?
我还有一种大激情... Well, I have one great passion that--
存活在我深深的腰间，就像... that lives deep within my loins, like a--
像燃烧中的金色雄鹰 Iike a flaming golden hawk:
有朝一日成为广播界的首席主播 To one day become a network anchor.
信不信由你 Well, believe it or not,
我们有共同的梦想 we share the same dream.
我也想成为广播界的首席主播 I too want to be an network anchor.
天，妳真漂亮 God, you are so beautiful.
我们该离开了 We really should be going.
我发誓，我从来未试过与同事发生关系 I swore that I would never get involved with a coworker.
等等 Wait.
如果，只是今晚，我们不是同事呢？ What if, just for tonight, we weren't coworkers?
我们是同好？ We were co-people?
- 我不... - 嘘 - I don't-- - Shh.
妳要像个女人 You be a woman.
我要像个男人 I'll be a man.
就这么简单 That's all.
噢 Oh.
你总是让我惊喜，博根狄先生 You continue to surprise me, Mr. Burgundy.
我要用我的骏马攻陷妳的城堡，我的伊人 Oh, I'm storming your castle on my steed, milady.
Oh, mi coraz es en fuego!
Julio, fuego, fuego, fuego!
等等，暂停，别那样呻吟 Wait, stop. Stop talking like that.
- 我听不懂 - 对不起 - I can't understand you. - Sorry.
带我到快乐镇吧！ Take me to Pleasure Town!
- 我们正在出发！ - 噢！ - Oh, we're going there! - Oh!
爱情像架子上的糖果 # Love is like candy on a shelf #
你想尝试就请随便... # You want to taste and help yourself... #
我他妈的爱妳！ I friggin' love you!
我也他妈的爱你！ I friggin' love you back!
请随便，随便取 # Help yourself, take a few #
那是我希望你做的... # That's what I want you to do... #
看！世上最壮丽的彩虹！ Look! The most glorious rainbow ever!
我们造上去吧！ Oh, do me on it!
只要你开口，他们就是你的... # Just say the word and they are yours... #
Whee!
在我心里，你的微笑为我打开心扉 # In my heart your smile has opened up the door #
世上最宝贵的财富就在里面 # The greatest wealth that exists in the world. #
Mmm.
干得好，先生 Well done, sir.
妳也一样，歌宁史东小姐 Tip of the cap to you as well, Miss Corningstone.
我对你有很强烈的感觉，博根狄先生 I'm having very strong feelings for you, Mr. Burgundy.
Mm.
但专业人仕的视野对我来说很重要 But it's very important to me that I be viewed as a professional.
对 - Right. - Hmm.
身在罗马 When in Rome.
对 Yeah.
这种说法 That, uh, expression
不能表达我心中的想法 doesn't really apply to what I'm talking about.
- 我... - 刚才的说话 - Oh, I'm-- - What I was saying.
我还不太明白妳那番话 I still don't quite understand what it means.
不，你总会明白的 Oh, no. You'll find it.
不，我是指 No, I was saying that,
若我们继续见面 if we continue seeing each other,
我们应该保持低调 that we should keep it relatively quiet around the station.
绝对是 Absolutely,
我狂野的心肝雌老虎 my wild love tigress.
谨慎地风流是游戏的规则 Tasteful discretion is the name of the game.
Mm-hmm.
花女歌宁史东和我上了床 Veronica Corningstone and I had sex,
现在我们恋爱了 and now we are in love!
我太大声吗？ Did I say that loud?
对，你可算是吼叫 Yeah, you pretty much yelled it.
我情不自禁 Well, I can't help it.
太美妙了！ It's fantastic!
- 觉得怎样，威？ - 那亲密时光？ - What's it like, Ron? - The intimate times?
欲仙欲死，兄弟！ Outta sight, my man!
不，还有一件事 No. The other thing.
爱 Love.
对了，那是什么？ Yeah. What is that?
这很难解释 Well, it's tough to explain.
- 我想我曾经恋爱过一次 - 真的，她叫什么名字？ - I think I was in love once. - Really, what was her name?
我忘记了 I don't remember.
开始不是太好 ，但请继续 That's not a good start, but keep going.
她是巴西人 She was Brazilian.
也许是中国人，或是其它地方 Or Chinese, or something weird.
我在市场的洗手间遇上她 I met her in the bathroom of a K-mart,
我们干了几个小时 and we made out for hours.
然后分手了，没再见面 Then we parted ways, never to see each other again.
我好肯定，那不是爱情 I'm pretty sure that's not love.
该死！ Damn it!
我爱... I love...
地毯 carpet.
我爱书台 I love desk.
砖头，你是否随便看到办公室的东西 就说你爱它？ Are you just looking at things in the office and saying you love them?
我爱台灯 I love lamp.
你真的爱台灯 还是只因为你看见它，才说你爱它？ Do you really love the lamp, or are you saying it because you saw it?
我爱台灯！我爱台灯 I love lamp! I love lamp.
你真的想知什么是爱吗？ You really want to know what love is?
- 是的 - 是的，告诉我们 - Yeah. - Yes, tell us.
超越世上任何事情 More than anything in the world.
爱其实很简单 Well, it's really quite simple.
就像... It's kind of like...
要找我的宝贝，要将她紧抱着 # Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight #
要抓住中午的快乐 # Gonna grab some afternoon delight #
我的座右铭永远是 “该来之时，它就会来” # My motto's always been "When it's right, it's right" #
为何等寒冷的午夜，闇夜 # Why wait until the middle of a cold, dark night #
当一切在白天开始明朗 # When everything's a little clearer in the light of day #
我们就知道 # And we know the night #
夜晚始终是存在吧？ # Is always gonna be there anyway? #
一想起妳吊起我的胃口 # Thinkin' of you's working up my appetite #
期待着中午的快乐 # Lookin' forward to a little afternoon delight #
火柴与火石一起会燃点火花 # Rubbin' sticks and stones together make the sparks ignite #
一想起爱妳就令人兴奋 # And the thought of lovin' you is getting so exciting #
火箭在飞翔 # Sky rockets in flight #
- 喎！ - 中午的快乐 - # Boo! # - # Afternoon delight... #
- 噢！ - 你们理解了，我想 - Whoop! - You guys have it, I think.
中午的快乐 # Afternoon delight. #
我不清楚，威，似乎有点疯狂 I don't know, Ron. That sounds kinda crazy.
似乎你有点精神问题，兄弟 Sounds like you have mental problems, man.
- 对，你有精神问题，兄弟 - 是啊，他的确是 - Yeah, you got mental problems, man. - Yeah, he really does.
兄弟 Man.
中午的快乐 # Afternoon delight. #
- 我要打个电话 - 变得精神焕发 - Wanna make a phone call. - Freshen this up.
小心，下一位是胡须帝国骄雄 Oh, look out. Next up, it's Whiskerus Maximus.
牠已经准备好在竞技场战斗了 He's ready to do battle in the arena
对手是你意想不到的小狮子 against the tiniest lion you've ever imagined.
我拍摄了些有趣的东西，歌宁史东小姐 I'm getting some great stuff, Miss Corningstone.
收声 Shut up.
我讨厌猫 Oh, I hate cats.
我们快点完成并离开这里 Let's just do my sign-off and get outta here.
在这宠物小屋有个真有意思的表演 It was quite a show down here at the Pet Shack.
今天，时装饰物并未害死猫儿 Just for today, fashion curiosity did not kill the cat.
我是第4频道新闻报导的花女歌宁史东 I'm Veronica Corningstone for Channel 4 News.
这是我们的新晋记者，花女歌宁史东 That was our newest reporter, Veronica Corningstone.
她真的很出色 She's really great.
我还很乐意告诉大家我们在约会 I'd also like to share with you that we are currently dating
而且她的床上功夫很有一手 and that she is quite a handful in the bedroom.
Uh...
多谢各位收睇6:00新闻 That's gonna do it for all of us here at 6:00.
我们是第4频道新闻组，我是威博根狄 For the Channel 4 News Team, I'm Ron Burgundy.
保持漂亮的圣地亚哥 You stay classy, San Diego.
完毕 All clear.
喔噢 Uh-oh.
那可能令我麻烦了 I might be in trouble on that one.
难以置信你在广播中说我们在约会 I can't believe that you said that we were dating on the air.
这蛋白酥不错 Mmm! Mmm. That is good fondue.
你明白吗，威？我想成为主播 Don't you get it, Ron? I wanna be an anchor.
若圣地亚哥每个人都认为我是你的骚货 That is never gonna happen if everyone in San Diego
那我的梦想就永难实现 thinks that I'm your bimbo gal pal.
我不知道说什么好 I don't know what to say.
我只是...我很兴奋 I just-- I got excited.
我只想在世界中心表现爱 I just wanted to shout it from on top of a mountain.
但我去不到世界中心 只有录像室及摄影机 But I didn't have a mountain. I had a newsroom and a camera.
听着 Look.
我报导新闻，那是我正在做的 I report the news. That's what I do.
在威博根狄的世界的今日头条 And today's top story, in Ron Burgundy's world,
就是说 read something like this:
我爱花女歌宁史东 I love Veronica Corningstone.
威 Oh, Ron.
这真好，兄弟，坐在这里 This is nice, gang, sittin' here.
- 对 - 伯兰在执拾了 - Oh, yeah. - Brown baggin' it.
明早8:00的组员班戟早餐众会改为9:00 The team pancake breakfast is tomorrow morning at 9:00 instead of 8:00.
差点忘了 Oh! Almost forgot.
我不能来，兄弟 I won't be able to make it, fellas.
花女和我在尝试新流行运动叫 Veronica and I are trying this new fad called,
缓步跑 uh, jogging.
我想是缓步跑或援步跑，该是缓步跑 I believe it's jogging or yogging. It might be a soft "J."
不肯定，总之是用脚来跑 I'm not sure, but apparently you just run
一段长时间 for an extended period of time.
- 该是很狂野的 - 那威不来了？ - It's supposed to be wild. - So Ron's not coming?
不，威会来 No, Ron's coming.
这是班戟早餐，是我们每月的行例 It's the pancake breakfast. We do it every month.
我明白 I realize that.
但有时你要对镜子向自己说身在罗马 Sometimes you gotta look yourself in the mirror and say, "When in Rome."
底线是 The bottom line is,
你已在这位女仕身上花了很多时间，威 you've been spending a lot of time with this lady.
你是第4频道新闻组之一 You're a member of the Channel 4 News Team.
- 很好的理由 - 我们需要你 - That's a given. - We need you.
该死，我需要你 Hell, I need you.
没有你我一塌糊涂 I'm a mess without ya.
我他妈的太挂念你 I miss you so damn much.
我怀念与你一起的日子 I miss being with you.
我怀念亲近你的日子，我想念你的笑声 I miss being near you. I miss your laugh.
我思念...我思念你的体味 I miss-- I miss your scent.
我想念你的古龙水 I miss your musk.
当这一切都解决 When this all gets sorted out,
你与我该一起同居 I think you and me should get an apartment together.
放松点，冠军 Just take it easy, Champ.
你为何不能安静一会？ Why don't you stop talking for a while?
也许我们太亲近了 Maybe sit the next couple of plays out.
你明白我的意思吗？ You know what I mean?
对，我不再多说了 Yeah, I'm gonna quit sayin' things
你是头领，你是庄家啊 when they crop up in the ol' skull, huh?
看看你不在时这里会怎样？ See what it's like when you're not here?
你是我们的队长，看看你对这组做了什么 You're our leader. Look what you're doing to the group.
冠军搞得一塌糊涂，砖头失眠 Champ's been a mess. Brick can't sleep at night.
最重要的是 Here's the thing,
我不相信这女人 I don't trust this chick.
我们需要你，而她只是利用你 We need you around, and she is just using you.
各位，放松吧，好吗？ Everyone, just relax. All right?
相信我 威博根狄还懂得一件事，就是女人 Believe me, if there's one thing Ron Burgundy knows, it's women.
我不清楚，威 I don't know, Ron.
知道吗，我很清楚 Guess what. I do.
总有一天，花女和我 I know that one day, Veronica and I are gonna get married
会在山顶结婚 on top of a mountain.
还会请人演奏长萧 And there's going to be flutes playing
还有长号和鲜花 and trombones and flowers
还有嫩草制造的花环 and garlands of fresh herbs.
而我们一直跳舞直至太阳升起 And we will dance till the sun rises.
我们的孩子会组成一队家庭乐队 And then our children will form a family band.
我们再到乡间巡游 And we will tour the countryside,
但你不会被邀请的！ and you won't be invited!
我相信，威的脑子已被那女人熏陶了 I'm telling you, this lady has really crawled into Ron's head.
好，很好！ Good. Good one!
好的，我明白了 Oh, okay. I understand.
祝你有愉快的一天，再见 You have a nice day, sir. Bye.
我可待会再来的，哈根先生 Um, I could come back later, Mr. Harken.
不，不，不 No, no, no.
只是身为家长的事而已 It's just parent stuff.
似乎我们的幼子基思 It seems that our youngest, Chris, was
用了些盐酸弹弓 on something called acid
向人群中射击 and was firing a bow and arrow into a crowd.
- 唔 - 现在的孩子就是这样 - Mm. - You know how kids are.
对了 Oh. Right.
有什么可以帮忙呢？ Anyhoo, what can I do you for?
哈根先生 Well, Mr. Harken,
我想我已证明了我是个新闻工作者 I feel like I have proven myself as a journalist
而我该拥有一个机会 and that I deserve the opportunity
去接受一单更具挑战性的新闻 to take on more challenging stories.
看看我有什么 Well, ask and you shall receive.
有了，这新闻新鲜滚热辣 Ah, yes, this just came across my desk.
关于一个103岁老太的新闻 Here is a story of a 103-year-old woman
她要求得到制作世上最好味肉面包的秘窍 who claims to have a recipe for the world's greatest meat loaf.
这是个不错的开始 Ooh, now that's a hot lead.
〔花女现在历尽艰辛〕 It was very hard for Veronica.
〔但她既专业又刻苦耐劳〕 But she was a pro and hung tough.
〔但很快，会发生一段小插曲〕 But soon, with a simple act of littering,
〔每个人的生活都被永远地改变〕 everyone's life would change forever.
啦... # La la la la la. #
噢，巴斯特，你是我的小绅士 # Oh, Baxter, you are my little gentleman #
我会带你去雾都伦敦 # I'll take you to foggy London Town #
因为你是什么？ # Because you are what? #
我的小绅士 # My little gentleman. #
这墨西哥卷真美味，但我已饱了 This burrito is delicious, but it is filling.
哇！ Whoa!
安东尼与埃及妖后！ Antony and Cleopatra!
该死的贱... Goddamn son of--
你他妈的怎么了，兄弟？ What the hell, bro'?
哈啰，朋友 Hello, neighbor.
你刚才将墨西哥卷丢出车窗吗？ Did you just throw a burrito out your window?
我相信是 I believe I did.
你很兴奋还是什么？看到发生了什么吗？ Are you high or something? Did you see what happened?
我看到 的确是很可怕的一跤，画面有点像草莓 I did. That was a terrific spill. That's quite a raspberry.
我那电单车被你毁了，浑蛋 That's my chopper you just thrashed, Broseph.
放松，朋友，我是你的朋友，对吧？ Easy, compadre. I'm your friend out here, all right?
你最好在我踢你这愚笨的屎忽前 把我的电单车修好 I want you to fix my chopper before I stomp your goofy ass!
若你要硬来的话，好吧 If you want to throw down, fine.
我的左手拳王与右手拳霸在等你 I've got Jack Johnson and Tom O'Leary waiting for you.
你毁了我唯一心爱的东西 You destroyed the only thing I love.
明白吗？那你喜欢什么？ All right? There it is. What do you love?
我喜欢写诗 I love poetry.
还有苏格兰威士忌 And a glass of Scotch.
当然，还有我这个朋友巴斯特 And, of course, my friend Baxter here.
那么猜猜看，现在发生什么 Well, guess what. Now this is happenin'.
对不起，对不起，你要干什么？ Excuse me. Excuse me. What are you doing?
我就是这样摔一跤了 That's how I roll.
巴斯特！ Baxter!
不...！ No...!
- 该死的他在哪里？ - 他该快到了 - Where the hell is he? - He'll be here.
- 我还以为他是可靠先生 - 这不像威的作风 - I thought he was Mr. Dependable. - It's not like Ron.
我想让砖头顶上 但若没有大风暴，他一点用都没有 I'd put Brick on, but unless he's tracking a storm front, he's useless.
- 打扰，各位 - 哈啰 - Excuse me, gentlemen. - Oh. Hello.
只想你知道 若威再不出现，我已准备好出镜 Just want you to know if Ron does not show up, I am ready to go on.
妳和我已讨论过不下百万次了 You and I have had this discussion a million times.
不可能有女主播的 There's never been a woman anchor.
哈根先生 Mr. Harken,
- 这城市需要新闻 - 噢 - this city needs its news. - Oh.
因为我有对乳房，所以你剥夺他们的权利？ You're gonna deprive them of that because I have breasts?
精致的乳房？ Exquisite breasts?
我会去主持，若你想阻止我，放马过来 I am gonna go on, and if you want to stop me, bring it on.
因为我擅长三样事情 Because I am good at three things:
打架、性交和报导新闻 fighting, screwing and reading the news.
我今天已做了其中一样 下一样会是什么呢？ I've already done one of those today, so what's the other one gonna be?
唔 Uh--
性交？ Screwing?
我去化妆间 I will be in makeup.
天，这女人真恐怖！ Jesus, she's terrifying!
芬 Fantana.
威，你没事吧？ Ron, are you okay?
那男人踢巴斯特！ The man punted Baxter!
冷静 Calm down.
呼吸，威，呼吸 Breathe, Ron, breathe.
那个心爱电单车的男人！ The man that loved the motorcycle!
那坏男人干了什么？ What did the bad man do?
那电单车在桥上！我用墨西哥卷击中他！ The motorcycle on the bridge! I hit him with a burrito!
- 威！ - 他抢了牠！ - Ron! - He took him!
他用脚抢了牠还踢牠！ He took him with his foot and he kicked him!
他这样做了！ That's what he did!
有人踢牠？ Someone punted him?
不，等等，等等，先让我说 No, wait. Wait. Let me say something.
先让我说 Let me say something.
什么？ What?
我...我不...我一点也不知你说什么 I-- I don't-- I didn't understand one word you said.
威，你还好吧？威？ Ron, are you okay? Ron?
威，你在哪里？ Ron. Where are you?
我在个悲伤的玻璃房里！ I'm in a glass case of emotion!
他要让歌宁史东出镜 He's gonna put Corningstone on.
他要让歌宁史东出镜了！ He's gonna put Corningstone on!
我要回去主持新闻！ I've got to do the news!
你不是威 You're not Ron.
倒数10秒后开始，祝妳好运，小姐 We're on in 10. Good luck, lady.
准备宣布 Ready the announce.
- 开机 - 入镜 - Power. - Roll in.
开机，开机 Power. Power.
妳一出丑 One slip,
妳就完了，诅咒 and you're gone. Whammy.
〔还有你的实地记者〕 And your reporter in the field,
〔高贵芬〕 Brian Fantana.
〔这里是第4频道6:00新闻报导〕 It's Channel 4 News at 6:00.
晚安，威博根狄今晚放假 Good evening. Ron Burgundy is off tonight.
我是花女歌宁史东 I'm Veronica Corningstone.
今晚的头条新闻 Tonight's top story:
- 好了，算是失而复得 - 三名持鎗男子 - Okay, we're off and running. - Three armed men
在一个美丽的晨早，头戴滑雪面具 wearing ski masks made off with over $20,000 from an area bank
从《地区银行》抢劫了$20,000 in a daring early morning robbery.
嗨！ Hey!
还有蛙跳比赛的优胜者是霍皮 And the winner of the frog-leaping contest was Hoppy,
高度为7呎10吋 with a jump of seven feet, 10 inches.
唔 Hmm.
我曾在阿拉巴马约会过一个叫霍皮的人 他的跳跃力也很惊人 I used to date a guy named Hoppy down in Alabama. He was quite a jumper, too.
多谢各位收睇6:00新闻 That will do it for us at 6:00.
我们是第4频道新闻组 From all of us here at Channel 4 News,
我是花女歌宁史东 I'm Veronica Corningstone,
欢迎光临，圣地亚哥 and thanks for stopping by, San Diego.
完毕！ All clear!
好极！好极！ Yes! Yes!
女主播！女主播！ Lady! Lady!
不错，歌宁史东小姐，一点也不错 Not bad, Miss Corningstone. Not bad at all.
谢谢，哈根先生，感觉真好 Thank you, Mr. Harken. That felt good.
- 感觉真的很好 - 我也喜欢妳的谢幕词 - That felt really good. - I liked your sign-off line, too.
你喜欢？只是偶尔想出，只是很普通 You did? It just came through me. It was so organic.
谢谢 Thank you.
威！威！威，亲爱的！ Oh, Ron! Ron! Ron, darling!
我真高兴你没事，噢，天 I'm so glad you're all right. Oh, God.
我有件很重要的事要告诉你 I have something magnificent to tell you.
我来了，我们现在可以报导新闻 I'm here. We can do the news now.
好了，各位！我们可以报导新闻 It's all right, everyone! We can do the news.
等等，大家怎么还呆站着？开始吧！ Hold on. Why are we all standing around? Let's go!
威，新闻已报导了，花女代替了你 Ron, we did it. Veronica filled in for you.
什么？ What?
甜心，我们都很担心你 Sweetheart, we were so worried about you,
我们已尽量等你，但... and we waited as long as we could, but--
亲爱的，我已报导了，而且很好，很好 Darling, I did the news, and I nailed it. I nailed it.
等等，等等！花女，请告诉我这是 Wait, wait! Veronica, please, tell me this is some kind
一些变态、没品味的玩笑 of sick, tasteless joke.
你刚才不在啊，你怎能这样？ You weren't here. Why are you being this way?
你身为我的同事和绅士爱人 Why can't you be proud of me
你为何不能以我为傲？ as a peer and as my gentleman lover?
天 Oh, Jeez.
我不能相信，妳竟然这样对我！ I can't believe you did this to me!
妳抢了我的饭碗！ You read my news!
我告诉过你想成为主播的 I told you that I wanted to be an anchor.
我告诉过你的 I told you that.
我以为妳开玩笑！ I thought you were kidding!
我以为是个笑话！ I thought it was a joke!
我甚至把它写在日记里！ I even wrote it down in my diary!
「花女今天说了个很好的笑话」 "Veronica had a very funny joke today."
我笑了整个晚上！ I laughed at it later that night!
真不能相信，我那么重视你 I can't believe that I cared for you.
滚开！走！ Get out! Just go!
我们完了！完了！ We are through! Through!
因为妳的卑劣行径，妳是蛇蝎妇人！ Because of your actions, you scorpion woman!
你令我心碎，博根狄先生 You have broken my heart, Mr. Burgundy.
你伤透我的心 You have broken my heart.
〔从那时开始〕 From there on out,
〔威博根狄的事情头头碰着黑〕 things just got worse for Ron Burgundy.
〔歌宁史东成为大明星〕 Corningstone was a star,
〔而她的事业更如日中天〕 and everything started to move awfully fast
- 〔在她的分手之后〕 - 依仁在哪？依仁！ - after her big break. - Where's lan? Ian!
好吧，我接到一个情报 All right, I got a call from network.
似乎我们昨晚的报导 It looks like our broadcast last night
上升了两点收视率 received a two-point ratings boost,
现在作出以下决定 and the decision has been passed down
让花女成为副主播 to make Veronica our co-anchor.
- 什么？ - 不，不！ - What? - No. No!
不！ No!
- 不！ - 不！ - No! - No!
- 不！ - 这真好极 - No! - This is wonderful.
爱德，过来，你这大傻瓜，你这大傻瓜 Ed, come here, you big silly man. You big silly man.
- 我们成功了 - 是什么，业余人仕时间？ - We did it. - What is this, amateur hour?
- 太好了 - 谢谢 - That's great. - Thank you.
- 今天阳光失去了... - 该死！ - # Sunshine, go away today... # - Damn it!
我不大想去跳舞 # I don't feel much like dancing #
有人走了，并试着逃离我的生活 # Some man's gone, he's trying to run my life #
不知道他要求什么 # Don't know what he's asking #
当他告诉我最好随波逐流 # When he tells me I better get in line #
我却听不清楚他说什么 # I can't hear what he's sayin' #
当我长大我要自力更生 # When I grow up I'm gonna make it mine #
这不是我该付出的... # These ain't dues... #
高贵没有告诉妳 What Brian didn't tell you
那些不是真正的海盗 was that those were not real pirates.
- 虽然他们看来很似 - 是的 - They looked convincing, though. - Oh, yes.
第4频道新闻组多谢各位收睇 Well, for all of us here at Channel 4 News,
我是威博根狄 I'm Ron Burgundy.
保持漂亮的圣地亚哥 You stay classy, San Diego.
而且欢迎光临 And thanks for stopping by.
但主要是保持漂亮 But mainly stay classy.
- 多谢大家欢迎光临 - 保持漂亮，我是威博根狄 - Thanks for stopping by. - Stay classy, I'm Ron Burgundy.
- 欢迎光临 - 保持漂亮 - Thanks for stopping by. - Stay classy.
威博根狄 Ron Burgundy.
妳真是个妓女，我要在公众场合掌掴妳 You are a real hooker, and I'm gonna slap you in public.
你有两粒笨蛋 You have man boobs.
妳有张肮脏淫荡的嘴 You've got a dirty, whorish mouth.
我要一拳打爆妳的子宫 I'm gonna punch you in the ovary.
- 直击 - 呀 - A straight shot. - Ooh, ow.
直达卵巢之内 Right to the baby-maker.
爵士萧是给小同志吹的 Ah, jazz flute is for little fairy boys.
好吧，到此为止 Okay, you know what? That's uncalled for.
我不能和这个女人共事，太可怕了 I can't work with this woman. It's terrible.
电话通了 It's ringing.
花女歌宁史东 Veronica Corningstone.
哈啰，花女，我是米克力夫真 Hello, Veronica, this is Mike Rithjin
《广播网》传来消息，妳刚刚被晋升了 from the network. You've just been promoted.
妳将被派到莫斯科 You're gonna need to move to Moscow.
所以马上收拾妳的书台 Start cleaning up your desk.
明早见，我们会派轻型货车迎接妳 See you in the morning. We'll pick you up in a van.
你刚才说什么，你的名字是？ What did you say your name was?
米克力夫真，这不重要 Mike Ritnitjun. It's not important.
马上收拾妳的书台 Start cleaning your desk,
我们明早会接妳 and we'll pick you up in the morning.
告诉她，她也许需要一件大褛 Tell her she might want to get a coat.
等等，花女？什么？ Hold on. Veronica? What was it?
告诉她需要一件大褛 Tell her to get a coat.
还有，不知道妳是否清楚莫斯科，很冷的 Also, I don't know if you know Moscow. It's pretty cold.
妳也许需要去买一件大褛 You might want to buy a coat.
你和冠军玩得很开心？威 Are you and Champ having a good time, Ron?
我是谁？ Are we what?
我看见你了，威 I can see you, Ron.
什么？ What?
我看到你 I can see you.
好的，拜拜 Okay. Bye-bye.
- 什么事？ - 她知道是我 - What happened? - She knew it was me.
你现在收看的是第4频道新闻报导 You're watching Channel 4 News
曾获5届《艾美奖》的优胜主播 with five-time Emmy award-winning anchor
威博根狄和乳头吱吱 Ron Burgundy and Tits McGee.
晚安，圣地亚哥，我是花女歌宁史东 Good evening, San Diego. I'm Veronica Corningstone.
乳头吱吱在放假 Tits McGee is on vacation.
还有我乳头...我是威博根狄 And I'm Tits-- I'm Ron Burgundy.
- 花女歌宁史东 - 我是妳的医生 - Veronica Corningstone. - This is your doctor.
我有妳的怀孕报告 I have your pregnancy report here, and guess what.
妳太疲累了，妳该尽快离开新闻界 You got knocked up. You should probably get out of news.
- 你是谁？ - 这是秦医生 - Who is this? - This is Dr. Chim.
- 秦理察医生 - 威，是你吗？ - Dr. Chim Richalds. - Ron, is this you?
- 我是专业医生 I'm a professional doctor.
妳见过我，但可能忘了 You saw me. You don't remember.
我们...妳该离开 We-- you should move.
- 离开这职业 - 这真可悲 - Get out of the business. - This is pathetic.
妳真可悲 You're pathetic.
她说什么？ What'd she say?
她...我不...我想她接受了 She-- I don't-- I think she bought it.
她在望过来 She's looking this way.
- 噢，唔，噢，哇！ - 她来了 - Oh, uh-oh. Whoa! - Here she comes.
我告诉你，这起不了作用 I'll tell you what, it's just not working.
她令我们看来像一群白痴 She's making us look like a bunch of fools.
- 爱伦，派对在哪里？ Ellen, where's the party?
孩子们，长大吧 Children, grow up.
贱蜂后 Son of a bee sting.
她发动整个办公室与我们对抗 She's turning the entire office against us.
- 这很残酷，十分残酷 - 我们怎么办？ - This is grim. Real grim. - What are we gonna do?
只有一件事男人能做的 There's only one thing a man can do
当他感到精神受创和存在主义惊恐时 when he's suffering from a spiritual and existential funk.
去动物园，用弹弓射猴子？ Go to the zoo, flip off the monkeys?
不，去买新衣服 No. Buy new suits.
对！ Yea!
那女孩 # That girl #
若她陪我度过整个晚上她是我的 # I'm gonna make her mine if it takes all night #
你喜欢吗？你喜欢吗？ # Can you dig it? Can you dig it? #
服装店在哪？我们已行了45分钟 Where's the suit store? We've been walking for 45 minutes.
砖头，你以前说过，这是快捷方式 Brick, I thought you said this was a shortcut.
你想象出来的 Fantastic.
- 这是不是快捷方式？ - 好的 - Is it a shortcut or not? - Okay.
天 Jeez.
嗨 Hey.
麻烦来了 Uh-oh. Here comes trouble.
博根狄和女仕们出来散步，对不？ Burgundy and the ladies went out for a stroll, huh?
你们这些小男孩散步时谈论什么？ You boys walkin' around and talkin' things through?
围成小圈 Keep a tight perimeter.
好了 Yes, sirree.
Well, well, well.
威博根狄 Ron Burgundy
和第4频道新闻组 and the Channel 4 News Team.
你们的妈咪在哪？ Where's your mommy?
你别搞事，晚间新闻组 You back off, Evening News Team.
我明白的 You know, I understand that, uh,
他们要带着一个女人工作 they had to bring a female in.
来帮你换尿布 Change your diapers.
帮你流口水的嘴抹口水 Wipe the dribble away from your bubblin' lips.
用《凡士林》抹你的小屁股 Rub Vaseline all over your heinie
再告诉你的大小与其它人是不一样的 and tell you that it's special and different from everyone else's.
他说「小屁股」！ He said "heinie"!
砖头，快点回来！ Brick, get back over here!
小屁股！ Heinie!
她有硬塞你进去吗？小威？ Does she tuck you in, Ronnie?
并在你的龟头献上一吻？ Give you a little kiss on your forehead?
让我告诉你有什么会发生好吗？ Tell you everything's gonna be okay?
我受够你了，文 I've had enough of you, Mantooth.
今天就作个了结吧，此时此地 This is gonna end right here, right now.
来玩玩吧，老二杂草 Let's dance, dickweed.
你想玩玩吗，小威？ You wanna dance, Ronnie?
让我打到你跳波尔卡舞 I wanna polka.
来尝尝我枝棒棒吧 Come get a taste.
砖头，你从哪里取得手榴弹？ Brick, where'd you get a hand grenade?
我不知道 I don't know.
好吧，我们上！ All right. Let's do this!
嗨！ Hey!
若你们想打架 If you're gonna have a fight,
别忘了我的第2频道新闻组 then don't forget Channel 2 News with me,
头领主播--率直肺 Iead anchor Frank Vitchard.
你这班烂袋躲到第三世界五年了 You dirtbags have been in third place for five years.
是吗？那么你们将要去死亡之地了 Yeah? Well, you're about to be in dead place.
别那么着急，你这忘恩负义之徒！ Not so fast, you ingrates!
公共新闻组也要舍弃仁慈的心 Public News Team is taking a break from its pledge drive
清理门户了 to kick some ass.
不要商业广告！不要留情！ No commercials! No mercy!
等等，贱东西！ C o est , pinches!
西班牙文新闻组在此 Spanish Language News is here.
今晚的头条新闻 Tonight's top story:
阴沟被博根狄之血焉红了 The sewers run red with Burgundy's blood.
呀，呀 Hyah! Hyah!
看来我们的新闻就是“血染双语广播节”了 Well looks like we got ourselves a bilingual bloodfest.
现在，开始以前，先说明规则 Now, before we do this, let's go over the ground rules.
第一 Rule number one:
不准扯头发或抓脸 No touching of the hair or face.
当然 Of course.
就是这些了！ And that's it!
现在我们上！ Now let's do this!
开始！ Begin!
我要搭火车直达你的肛门！ I'm gonna straight-up murder your ass!
- 刀！ - 这里，兄弟！ - Blade! - Here you go, mate!
天！ Ahh! God!
我没看到！ Oh! I did not see that coming!
呀！ Oh! Aaah!
- 现在我第一(痾尿)了 - 不，你不是！ - Now I'll be number one. - No, you won't!
警察来了！ Policeman!
兄弟，这腹背受敌状况发生得太快了 Boy, that escalated quickly.
真的有点措手不及 I mean, that really got out of hand fast.
- 真的令人铭记于心 - 的确，对吧？ - It jumped up a notch. - It did, didn't it?
是，我插中一个人的心脏 Yeah, I stabbed a man in the heart.
我看见，砖头杀了一个人 I saw that. Brick killed a guy.
- 是你扔三叉戟吗？ - 是的 - Did you throw a trident? - Yeah.
有几匹马和一个着火的人 我就用三叉戟杀了其中一个 There were horses and a man on fire and I killed a guy with a trident.
我就是想和你谈这个 I've been meaning to talk to you about that.
你要找个安全地方或者躲进就近的亲戚处 Find yourself a safe house or a relative close by.
躲一段时间，你有可能因谋杀罪而被通缉 Lay low for a while, because you're probably wanted for murder.
我真是以你们为荣啊 I'm proud of you fellas.
我们幸好还保得住头颅 You kept your head on a swivel.
这正是在邪恶中为男性专严而战的表现 That's what you gotta do when you're in a vicious cockfight.
你能相信文和第9频道晚间新闻组吗？ Can you believe Mantooth and the Channel 9 Evening News Team?
「你们的妈咪在哪？有人要为你换尿布」 "Where's your mommy? Someone's gotta change your diapers."
歌宁史东的所作所为 真的影响了我们的江湖声誉 This Corningstone business is really hurting our rep.
我绝对明白你的意思，高贵 I know exactly what you mean, Brian.
城里每个新闻从业员都在嘲笑我们 Every newsman in this city's laughing at us.
- 而我不喜欢这样 - 我不喜欢被羞辱 - And I don't like it. - I don't like the put-downs.
我们该做些事 We're gonna do something about it.
该了结这一切了！ It is time to put an end to this!
记起以前我们是雄纠纠的 我是威博根狄，你呢？ Last time I looked, my name's Ron Burgundy. What's your name?
- 高贵芬 - 冠军佬 - Brian Fantana. - Champ Kind.
- 高贵芬 - 不，你是砖头 - Brian Fantana. - No, you're Brick.
- 高贵 - 我是高贵 - Brian. - I'm Brian.
Veronica.
〔你该为我而骄傲，老头子〕 And I've shown you, old man!
加夫，我要看这些录像带，可能是大新闻 Garth, I need to look at these tapes for a potential lead.
但...威正使用录像机 Ron's using the machine
看他去年获得《艾美奖》的得奖演讲 to play his local Emmy acceptance speech from last year.
我试过约她去街 I tried to ask her out on a date.
〔关掉音乐！我还未说完！〕 Turn the music off! I'm still talking!
- 这真荒谬！ - 我不记得这样做过 - This is ridiculous! - I don't remember doing it.
对不起，妳要干什么？ - Excuse me. - What are you doing?
我需要这录像机来看一段录像作为新闻 I need this machine so I can watch a tape for a story.
但我正在播放 I'm using the tape.
我为谢菲播放我的《艾美奖》录像 I'm showing Jeffrey my Emmy tape.
我们在回顾历史 We are watching history.
博根狄先生，我是专业人仕 Mr. Burgundy, I'm a professional,
我希望能进行我的工作 and I would like to be able to do my job.
大人物啊！我是更专业人仕！ Big deal! I am very professional!
博根狄先生，你像个婴儿一样 Mr. Burgundy, you are acting like a baby.
我不是婴儿，我是个男人，我是个男主播！ I'm not a baby, I am a man. I am an anchorman!
你不是男人，你是个天大的笑话！ You are not a man. You are a big fat joke!
我是个男人，发明汽车的男人 I'm a man who discovered the wheel
还有用钢筋兴建艾菲尔铁塔的男人 and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn.
我就是那类男人 That's what kind of man I am.
妳只是个胸大无脑的女人 You're just a woman with a small brain.
脑容量只有我们的三分之一 有科学根据的 With a brain a third the size of us. It's science.
我得让你知道，我比你更有天份 I will have you know that I have more talent
还更加聪明，就连我的尾指 and more intelligence in my little finger
也大过你你身体的任何部分，先生！ than you do in your entire body, sir!
妳是个很臭的海盗妓女！ You are a smelly pirate hooker!
你像是一粒蓝莓 You look like a blueberry.
妳为何不回去妳的家“奸银岛”？ Why don't you go back to your home on Whore lsland?
你的发型太差劲了 Well, you have bad hair.
妳说什么？ What did you say?
我说 I said
你的发型 your hair
看来像白痴 Iooks stupid.
- 让他们自行解决！ - 这是他俩的事！ - Let 'em work it out! - It's between the two of them!
他们只是在交谈，只是交谈 They're just talking. Just talking.
- 我恨妳！ - 我更恨你！ - I hate you! - I hate you more!
噢！ Ow!
收声！收声！ Shut up! Shut up!
够了，停手！ All right, stop!
你们要停止了！马上停手！ Stop what you're doing right now!
我不想我的办公室分裂 I will not have my newsroom be divided.
哥伦布骑士，那很痛！ Ah! Knights of Columbus, that hurts!
我心想，「那男孩是谁？」 I was like, "Who is that guy?"
真不敢相信，威竟然这么对妳 I just can't believe what Ron did to you.
太可怕了 It is so awful.
是啊 Yes.
妳有否想过以毒 Have you ever thought about fighting fire
攻毒？ with fire?
什么意思？ What do you mean?
我有些消息，妳可选择用与不用 I have some information that you can choose to use or not use.
随便妳 Up to you.
威博根狄 Ron Burgundy
会完全按照讲词提示机的照讲读稿 will read anything that is put on that Teleprompter.
无论我写任何东西 And when I say anything,
我指任何东西 I mean an-y-thing.
阿诺，信号一 Arnold, cue one.
当摄影机被毁后 After the FotoMat was destroyed,
那熊蹦蹦跳地回到森林 the bear scampered back into the woods.
很明显，牠很不满意牠的影照 Apparently he wasn't too happy with his color prints.
噢 Oh.
第4频道新闻组多谢各位收睇 From the entire Channel 4 News Team,
我是花女歌宁史东 I'm Veronica Corningstone.
我是威博根狄 And I'm Ron Burgundy.
去干你自己吧，圣地亚哥 Go fuck yourself, San Diego.
什么，以父之... What in the name--
不！ No!
没人能这样说我们的城市！ Nobody talks about my city that way!
威博根狄屁股塞草！ Ron Burgundy's ass is grass!
干得好，各位，精彩的转播 Nice work, everyone. Sharp broadcast.
真的很好，在场的所有人都很好 Really good. Everyone on the floor as well.
充满敌意，我喜欢 Really a lot of hustle. I liked it.
别接！别接！ Dump out! Dump out!
哈啰，爱德 Hello, Edward.
- 威，我不得不解雇你 - 我得解雇你 - Ron, I've got to fire you. - I've got to fire you.
你被解雇了，爱德 Bing, bong, bong. You're fired, Ed.
你知你刚才在说什么吗？ Do you even know what you just said?
伟大奥丁的掠夺！ Great Odin's raven!
你开心吗，威？ Are you happy, Ron?
花女，是她把这在放上提示机的 Veronica. She put that in the Teleprompter.
你可能是对 但这真的很大件事，威，的确大件事 You're probably right, but this is bad, Ron. Real bad.
我是被迫的，我... My hands are tied. I--
我要解雇你 I gotta fire you.
爱德，等一下，我们数10下 Ed, let's hold on. Let's count to 10.
这是个轻率的决定，是有其它问题吗？ That's a rash decision. Is this about something else?
爱德，外面有300多个愤怒的圣地亚哥... Ed, there's 300 very angry San Diego-ites.
圣地亚哥屎民 圣地亚哥斯民 San Diego-ins. San Diego-uns.
- 圣地亚哥丝民 - 圣地亚哥市民 - San Dieg-ons. - San Diegans.
圣地亚哥市民在电台前 San Diegans out in front of the station.
说要将威放血 They want Ron's blood.
他们想伤害你，威 They want to hurt you.
你为何那样说？为什么？ Why did you say that? Why?
为什么？威？为什么？ Why, Ron? Why?
你是我的英雄，威 You're my hero, Ron.
加夫，我... Garth, l--
你就像痾屎般放出臭气！ And you come out with stink like that poop!
你的嘴在痾屎！所有的屎由你的嘴痾出来！ You poop mouth! Get all the poop out of your mouth!
若我把所有的钱都从银包掏出来给你 会不会舒缓你的痛苦呢？ If I were to give you money out of my wallet, would that ease the pain?
我恨你，威博根狄！我恨你！ I hate you, Ron Burgundy! I hate you!
威？威！我也不想弄成这样 Ron? Ron!
不敢相信 妳竟然这样陷害我，现在妳高兴吧？ I can't believe you did this to me! Are you happy?
不，威，一点也不！ No, Ron, I'm not!
我现在什么也没有！没有了！ I have nothing left! Nothing!
我现在身败名裂了！ I've been reduced to rubble!
走吧，这些人差不多要把你碎尸了 Let's go. These people are about to pull you apart.
不！不！ No! No!
博根狄先生，你该为自己感到羞耻 Mr. Burgundy, you should be ashamed of yourself.
- 对不起，我... - 你真是个可怕的人！ - Please, l-- - You're an awful man!
你实在令我们失望，博根狄先生！ You are truly a disappointment to us all, Mr. Burgundy!
〔鲍迪伦曾经写过一首歌〕 Bob Dylan once wrote,
〔风水轮流转〕 "The times, they are a-changin'."
〔威博根狄从没听过这首歌〕 Ron Burgundy had never heard that song.
〔所以当他跌倒时，伤得更痛〕 So when he fell, he fell hard.
〔这里是第4频道6:00新闻报导〕 It's Channel 4 News at 6:00!
〔晚安，圣地亚哥〕 Good evening, San Diego.
〔我是女主播花女歌宁史东〕 I'm lead anchor Veronica Corningstone.
〔今晚的头条新闻，是王玲的劲爆消息〕 Tonight's top story: an ultrasound of Ling Wong,
〔世上最著名的熊猫〕 the most famous panda in the world,
〔她未诞生的孩子情况很好〕 shows that her baby is doing quite well.
不！ No!
我是威博根狄，保持漂亮 Ron Burgundy, stay classy.
哈啰，我是威 Hello, this is Ron.
哈啰 Hello.
你是谁？我在问你是谁，哈啰 Who's there? I'm talking. Hello.
你是谁？ Who is this?
巴斯特，是你吗？ Baxter, is that you?
巴斯特！ Baxter!
若你在密尔瓦基的话就吠两声吧 Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee.
那你在威尔特张伯伦吗？ Is this Wilt Chamberlain?
鼓起勇气说话啊，哈啰！ Have the courage to say something. Hello!
哈啰！ Hello!
行路要带眼，先生 Hey, you watch yourself, mister.
红帽女郎，好 Hey, lady in the red hat. Yeah.
你很臭 You smell.
各位，各位，是我啊，威 Guys. Guys, it's me, Ron.
兄弟！ Fellas!
哈根说 若我们和你说话，他会解雇我们 Harken said he'd fire us if we talked to you.
- 什么？ - 对不起 - What? - I'm sorry.
我...高贵！ I-- Brian!
- 是小威啊！ - 威！ - It's Ronnie! - Ron!
- 冠军！ - 威！ - Champ! - Ron!
冠军，不是吧，别这样！ Champ, come on. Come on!
走吧，砖头 Go, Brick.
我亲爱的砖头 My sweet Brick.
砖头，过来拥抱我，我知你一直想这样 Brick, come hug me. I know you want to.
我现在非常凄惨了，圣地亚哥！ I am completely miserable, San Diego!
真他妈的热！ It's so damn hot!
不该选择喝牛奶！ Milk was a bad choice!
三个月后
是的，是的，基思，听我说 Yes, yes. Chris, listen to me.
把鎗放下并让游行乐队走 Put down the gun and let the marching band go.
我们会把这事当成恶作剧 We'll play it off as a prank.
稍后再去澄清，我要接另一个电话 We'll straighten it out later. I'm getting another call.
爱德哈根 Ed Harken.
什么？我的天！ What? Oh, my God!
大家听着，熊猫王玲快要生了！ Listen, everybody, Ling Wong the panda is giving birth!
找歌宁史东过去采访！ Get Corningstone over there right away!
广播界将会对此广泛报导 The network is picking up the feed.
我要有熊猫生产时的特写！ I want a shot of that panda being born!
我是坏男孩，洛杉矶第6频道新闻 This is Ted Nightingale, Channel 6 News Los Angeles,
现于圣地亚哥动物园直击报导 reporting from the San Diego Zoo.
在这个时刻 And this is the moment
全世界都在等待着 the entire world has been waiting for.
我只能推测这熊猫的性别 I can only speculate as to the sex of the panda,
若要我猜的话，我会说是雌熊猫 but if I had to guess, I'd say female.
- 借过，传媒 - 女仕，小心 - Excuse me. Press. - Hey, lady, watch it.
对不起，我是传媒，谢谢，情况如何？ Excuse me, I'm press. Thank you. What do you got?
什么也没有，只能看到一道蓝色帘 Nothing. All I can see is a blue curtain.
该死 Oh, damn it.
去那里看看能否拍摄到，我去这边 Go over there and see if you can get a shot. I'll go this way.
嗨，女仕 不若妳帮我买份三文治过来吧？ Hey, lady, why don't you go fetch me a sandwich?
好的，我就去帮你买一份 Okay, I'll go get your sandwich.
之后我会证明 你的收视率是女人的第二(痾屎) Then I'll show you the ratings where you're number two to a woman.
别再脱发了 Ouch. Don't lose any more hair over it.
- 怎说怎好 - 我们在直播，文先生 - Whatever. - We're live, Mr. Mantooth.
午安，圣地亚哥 Good afternoon, San Diego.
今天我们在庆祝熊猫的出世 We're here today to celebrate the birth of a panda.
火箭在飞翔 # Sky rockets in flight #
中午的快乐 # Afternoon delight #
# Af-- #
我的嘴能发出放屁的声音 # I make fart noises with my mouth #
- 而且我想剪... - 痴线佬！ - # And I like to cut-- # - Hey, nut job!
别再唱！ Quit the singin'!
吓走了我的顾客 Creeping out all the regulars.
我要以雄伟的歌曲 来抒发我内心的苦恼！ I'm expressing my inner anguish through the majesty of song!
听着，醉汉，你每天都来这里 Look, drunkie, you been coming in here every day,
疯了般弄臭这里的欢乐 stinking up the joint with your craziness.
你到底有什么问题？ Now, what the hell is wrong with you?
我的心碎了！ I got no heart!
因为那女魔头偷去了！ Because a she-devil stole it!
你知最差的是什么？ You know what the worst part about it is?
她比我出色！ She's better than me!
她比我出色 She's better than me.
我告诉你，风水轮流转 You know, times are changing.
女仕们现在很能干 Ladies can do stuff now.
你该学会怎样接受现实 You're gonna have to learn how to deal with that.
什么？你刚才在说话？ What? Were you saying something?
听着，我不懂西班牙文 Look, I don't speak Spanish.
呀 Ah.
史葛 Scotty.
史葛，我这里能拍摄 Scotty, I have the shot.
史葛，史葛！ Scotty. Scotty!
嗨 Hey, uh,
在这里拍摄会拍到些好素材啊 that is some fantastic shot you got there.
好得可以成为新闻界的顶尖儿 The kind of shot that gets you to the top of network news.
- 希望吧 - 我们是公共电视台 - Oh, well, we hope. - We at public television,
我们的确有时比不上女人聪明 we're really down with the woman's lib thing.
这真的令我精神为之一振 That is so refreshing to me.
因为我们虽然有竞争...哗...呀... Because the struggle I've--
夏域，这里有好位置 Howie, we have the shot.
上一点，上，上 Up a little. Up, up.
你这贱种！ Oh. You son of a bitch!
Shh!
别吵醒妳的朋友 Don't want to wake up your friends.
〔请肃静，熊在冬眠！〕 别吵醒妳的朋友 Don't want to wake up your friends.
〔请肃静，熊在冬眠！〕
救命！ Help!
- 突然不见了 - 你怎能不跟着你的女主播？ - Simply vanished. - How do you lose your lead anchor?
- 我找不到歌宁史东 - 她到底去了哪里？ - I can't find Corningstone. - Where the hell is she?
- 没人看到她 - 难以置信 - No one's seen her. - I can't believe this.
全世界的新闻部都期盼着转播 Every news outlet in the world is looking for coverage on this.
我却没有该死的主播！ I've got no damn lead anchor!
该死！给我电话 Damn it! Get me a phone.
真难相信我要这样做 I can't believe I'm about to do this.
《洛奇酒吧》，烤肉，上餐提供 Rocky's, bar, grill, fine dining.
- 有个主播在吗？ - 等等 - Is there an anchorman there? - Hold on.
我真受不了，我宁可割喉自尽 This is killing me. I'd rather slit my throat.
- 哈啰？ - 哈啰？ - Hello? - Hello?
- 是威吗？ - 你是谁？ - Is this Ron? - Who is this?
- 是我，爱德 - 谁？ - It's me. Ed. - Who?
- 爱德哈根 - 我不识力德 - Ed Harken. - I don't know a Ned.
- 爱德哈根！ - 爱德！ - Ed Harken! - Ed!
- 爱德，哈啰 - 听着，威 - Ed, hello. - Listen, Ron.
歌宁史东 在本年最大新闻报导前突然消失 Corningstone disappeared in the midst of the biggest story of the year.
我们马上需要你来 We need you down here right away.
等等，爱德 Wait, Ed.
你是说打算再让我报导新闻？ Does this mean you're asking me to report the news again?
- 是的 - 爱德！ - Yes. - Ed!
好极了！谢谢！ That's wonderful! Thank you!
爱德，等等，我想说几句 Ed, hold on. I want to say a few words.
- 你永远是我的最好朋友！ - 好吧 - You have always been a good friend! - Right.
- 永远！ - 好吧 - Always! - Right.
尽快赶到这里来 Get down here as quickly as you can.
爱德，我马上就到 Ed, I'll be down there.
而且我要神采飞扬 And I'm going to look good.
晚安，我是威博根狄 Good evening. I'm Ron Burgundy.
该死！那兄弟妆扮得很好！ Damn! That dude cleans up good!
若要我出马 我要与我的新闻组站在同一阵线 If I'm gonna do this, I'll need my news team at my side.
新闻组！ News team!
召集！ Assemble!
新闻组，召集！ News team, assemble!
嗨，威 Hey, Ron.
什么事？ What's up?
噢 Oh.
嗨，没看见你们 Hi. Didn't see you there.
我们一直在陪着你 We've been here literally the entire time you have.
我有点尴尬 I'm a little embarrassed.
听着 Look.
我刚接到哈根的电话，他想我回去 I just got the call from Harken. He wants me back.
但没有我的新闻组我做不到 But I can't do this without my news team.
我不清楚，威 I don't know, Ron.
那已是半辈子前的事 我们变得和以前不一样了 That was half a lifetime ago. We're different people now.
当你离开后，我们受伤太深了 When you left, the hurt was so deep.
我不清楚能否度过这段时间 I don't know if I can go through that again.
想想你在要求我们做什么，兄弟 Think about what you're asking.
.............................，兄弟 Man.
各位 Gentlemen,
曾经有段时光 there was a time
你们叫我男主播 when you called me your lead anchor.
你们愿意再次和我合作吗？ Will you follow me again?
我他妈的太老了 I'm gettin' too old for this shit.
去采访车！ To the news van!
- 去采访车！ - 好的！ - To the news van! - Okay!
呀！ Ahh!
威博根狄 Well, I'll be. Ron Burgundy.
他回来了！ He's back!
各位，我们找个好位置来采访 Gentlemen, let's try to get in a good position for the story.
- 我的发型怎样？ - 很壮丽 - How does the hair look? - Magnificent.
你的发型像天使般 You have hair like an angel.
《广播网》的星探 Oh, whoa, whoa. Network talent scout.
- 他是重要人物 - 我的确很紧张 - This is a hot one. - I'm actually nervous.
我们去采访 Let's go get 'em.
等等，你们听到什么吗？ Wait! Did you just hear something?
救命 Help.
- 威，救我！ - 花女！ - Ron, help! - Veronica!
妳好吗？ - Are you okay? - Shh!
妳怎样落去的？ How did you get down there?
请你去找人帮忙吧 Just go get someone. Please.
等等，等等！ Hold on. Hold on!
我们要帮帮忙 We've got to do something.
威，我不想太残忍，但... Whoa, Ron, I don't want to sound cruel, but--
《广播网》的星探在那里啊 There's a network talent scout over there.
这是个很困难的决定 This is a tough decision.
太多东西要考虑 So much to think about.
我的职业生涯中最大的新闻 Basically the biggest story of my career,
能让我跃升到一个前所未有的新阶段 Iaunching me to a level I've never known before,
或是去救那女人 or saving the woman
曾经和我有密切关系的女人 I used to have familiar relations with.
很难决择！ This is hard!
我的内心在交战！ I am in a pickle!
威，我知这会有点不中听 Ron, I know it sounds harsh,
但神不想她活在世上 but God does not want her to live.
不，等等 No. Hold on.
我知道了 It's clear now.
我们要去熊窦 We go into the bear pit.
威，不要 Ron, don't.
噢！ Oh!
我现在很后悔了 I immediately regret this decision.
你在干什么？你为何不去找人帮忙？ What are you doing? Why didn't you get help?
这些熊都很巨型！ These bears are massive!
从上面看他们小得多 They looked a lot smaller from up there.
兄弟，我们去找哈根 Fan out. Let's go find Harken.
保持冷静 Stay calm.
没事了，我想没事了，我亲爱的栗鼠 It's all right. I think it's all right, my sweet chinchilla.
- 威 - 什么，什么 - Oh, Ron. - Yes, yes.
万一今天我俩死在这里 In case we die here today,
你必须知道一件事 there's something that you should know.
那个用提示机的肮脏手段，只是... That dirty trick with the Teleprompter, it wasn't--
我的小甜甜，不是妳做的，对吗？ Sweet Eli Whitney's nose! It wasn't you, was it?
是西哥文做的 It was Wes Mantooth.
- 我为何想不到 - 不，不 - Oh, I should have known. - No, no.
- 不，是我做的 - 妳这贱东西！ - No, I did it. - You bitch!
Shh!
妳把熊吵醒了，妳为何要这样做？ You woke the bears. Why did you do that?
有人在熊窦里！ There's somebody in the bear pit!
我快要死了 It took my impending death
这才明白到，我是多么的需要妳 for me to realize how much I need you.
威 Oh, Ron.
那些熊会伤害他们的！ Those bears are gonna hurt them!
新闻组，我们去打猎 News team, let's hunt.
新闻组！ News team!
人熊混战！ Bear fight!
来吧，来吧！ Come on. Come on!
该死！ Damn!
打牠们的阴囊！ Hit 'em in the uvula!
威！ Hey, Ron!
我骑着毛毛拖拉机！ I'm riding a furry tractor!
熊在招呼那些新闻组 The bears have descended on the news team
似乎不大好 and it's not going well.
好肯定，过了今天，我不会再... Clearly, after today, I will no longer--
不是吧！天！ Come on! Oh, God!
这真荒他妈的谬！ It's getting to be ri-goddamn-diculous!
不 Oh, no.
我们吵醒熊妈妈了 We woke up the mama.
天！ Oh, God!
我不想死 I don't wanna die.
巴斯特！ Baxter!
看，牠们跟妈妈回去了！ Look! They're following their mother!
这是动物的本能 It's instinct.
巴斯特！ Oh, Baxter!
巴斯特，你仍然活着！ Oh! Oh, Baxter, you're still alive!
我太高兴了！ Oh, I'm so happy!
我太高兴了！你还活着！ I'm so happy! You are alive!
我太高兴了！ I'm so happy!
我要舔你！ I will lick you!
我要在众人面前舔你 表现我有多高兴 I will lick you in front of everyone to show my joy.
噢！ Oh. Ohhh!
兄弟，他真的很爱那只狗 Boy, he really likes that dog.
博根狄！博根狄！ Burgundy! Burgundy!
嗨，威 Hi, Ron.
从这掉下去很高，对不？ It's always a long fall from the top, isn't it?
放松，西哥 Easy, Wes.
这话我已等了很久 I've been waiting to say this to you for a long time.
- 好吧 - 一直藏于心底 - All right. - Deep down in my stomach,
遍布全身肌肤 with every inch of me,
我完全，非常 I pure, straight
恨你！ hate you!
但...该死，我很尊重你！ But, God damn it, do I respect you!
谢谢 Thank you,
兄弟 brother.
博根狄！博根狄！ Burgundy! Burgundy!
今天我们明白到救赎 Today we spell redemption
就-是-威 R-O-N.
博根狄！博根狄！ Burgundy! Burgundy!
威，你是我的英雄！ Ron, you're my hero!
威，我想你有单新闻要报导了 Ron, I think you've got a story to report.
真的吗，爱德？ Are you sure, Ed?
去干吧 Do it.
这是你注定要报导的 It's the story you were born to tell.
圣地亚哥在等着你，去吧 San Diego's waiting. Go get 'em.
让开！ Make way!
威博根狄将要报导熊猫的消息！ Ron Burgundy's about to report on pandas!
开始倒数，3 Count me down. Three.
你在直播，博根狄先生 You're live, Mr. Burgundy.
我是威博根狄 This is Ron Burgundy,
很骄傲地能再次在第4频道新闻报导 proudly reporting once again for Channel 4 News.
今天的新闻是可一不可再的消息 Today's story is one of the more remarkable things
尤其是对圣地亚哥 ever to happen to San Diago
甚至全世界 or even the world.
但为了准确地报导这件事情 But in order to properly retell it,
我需要我的 I'm going to need some help
副主播帮助 from my co-anchor,
花女歌宁史东小姐 Miss Veronica Corningstone.
- 真是令人紧张... - 不，不，不，不，砖头 - High-pressure system-- - No, no, no, no, Brick.
- 真是令人紧张... - 站到那里去 - High-pressure system-- - Go stand over there.
威 Oh, Ron.
威，有上千名的主播 Ron, there are literally thousands of men
可以代替我的 that I should be with instead,
但我有72%肯定，我爱的是你 but I am 72% sure that I love you.
〔是的，救赎对威博根狄来说很美好〕 Yes, redemption was sweet for Ron Burgundy.
好！威！ Yes! Ron!
- 〔至于新闻小组〕 - 停下来！威！ - As for the news team: - Stop it! Ron!
冠军佬后来去了《NFL》当评论员 Champ Kind went on to become a commentator for the NFL,
但不久就解雇，原因是他被控 but was later fired after being accused
对男同事泰利伯梳进行性骚扰 of sexual harassment by Terry Bradshaw.
请问 Excuse me.
你的古龙水是性感黑豹吗？ Is that Sex Panther you're wearing?
高贵芬也变得很成功 Brian Fantana went on to have great success
是因为他在《霍士电视台》主持了 as the host of the hit reality TV show
真实电视节目《交流之岛》 "lntercourse lsland" on the Fox Network.
有人看见砖头了吗？ Anyone seen Brick?
- 砖头？ - 别这样，很痒！ - Brick? - Don't! That tickles!
不，太痒了！别这样！ No, that tickles me! Come on!
砖头添结婚后有11个孩子 Brick Tamland is married with 1 1 children
而且成为了顶尖级的政治顾问 and is one of the top political advisors
在白宫协助布殊总统 to the Bush White House.
我也要搔你！我也要搔你！ I'm gonna get you! I'm gonna get you!
〔至于威和花女 没在圣地亚哥留了很久〕 And Ron and Veronica didn't stay in San Diego long.
〔我挑选他们取代我的位置〕 I chose them as my replacement,
〔他们成为新闻界第一对男女播音组合〕 and they became the first mixed-gender network news team,
直至今时今日 and they're still doing it today.
多谢大家收睇世界新闻报导中心 From all of us here at the World News Center,
我是花女歌宁史东 I'm Veronica Corningstone.
而我是威博根狄 And I'm Ron Burgundy.
保持漂亮吧，地球 You stay classy, planet Earth.
# Carry on, my wayward son #
# There'll be peace when you are done #
# Lay your weary head to rest #
# Don't you cry no more... #
伟大奥丁的掠夺！ Oh! Great Odin's raven!
以雷神之锤之名！ Oh! By the hammer of Thor!
以圣戴尔胡子之名！ Oh! Saint Damien's beard!
甜蜜的嬷嬷铁铲！ Sweet grandmother's spatula!
很烫的咖啡！ Oh! Hot pot of coffee!
庄纳森叔叔的大条玉米！ Uncle Jonathan's corncob pipe!
妳再不注意的话我就用气鎗射妳 I'm gonna shoot you with a BB gun when you're not looking.
射妳的后脑 In the back of the head.
对不起 I'm sorry.
你不是很聪明，你该知道的，对不？ You're not very bright. You know that, right?
你实在是个笨蛋 You're actually quite a dullard.
这里的人都知道 Everyone here knows it.
若我是笨蛋，妳是，唔，笨... If I'm a dullard, you're the, uh, the dull--
想不到说什么，对不？ Oh! Can't think of anything to say, can you?
不，我想到，我想到很多东西说 Yes, I can. I can think of a lot of things to say.
就像，妳是个肮脏的贱东西 Like, you're a dirty bitch.
好的，威，我要落毒... Well, Ron, I'm gonna put poison--
我的天！ Oh, my God!
我喝了杯熔岩灯，不是熔岩 I drank a lava lamp. It wasn't lava.
我吃了一堆玻璃纤维绝缘体 I ate a whole bunch of fiberglass insulation.
却发现那人骗我是棉花糖 It wasn't cotton candy like that guy said.
我的胃很痒 My stomach's itchy.
我痾了一枝锤 I pooped a hammer.
我痾了一部录音机 I pooped a tape recorder.
我痾了康瓦耳比赛的母鸡 I pooped a Cornish game hen.
唔... Uh...
不 Nope.
你不再说话客气点 You do not take a tone with me,
我会使出拳王之手来惩罚你！ 'cause I will give you a rap right on the Jack Johnson!
- 好的 - 是的 - Okay. - Yes.
现在有事发生了 Now this is happenin'.
你要干什么？ What are you doing?
- 呀！ - 你在干什么？ - Hah! - What are you doing?
你在... What are you--
开镜 Action.
我们去做我最擅长的... We'll go back to doing what I do best--
我想我们去做我最擅长的，炫耀一下 I guess we'll go back to doing what I do best, show off.
我们什么时候开始？ When do we get started?
- 那是我的台词 - 我们什么时候开始？ - That's my line. - When do we get started?
你该说：「你想哪时就哪时」 You say, "Whenever you like."
你想哪时就哪时 Whenever you like.
继续拍，这是好材料 Keep it rollin'. This is good stuff.
...《地区银行》在一个美丽... ...an area bank in a daring...
该不是同一间银行，该不是同一个劫匪 Probably not the same one. Probably not the same guy.
砖头，先让我问你 Brick, before I let you go,
你今夏还会参加《名人高尔夫球巡回赛》吗？ are you still having your celebrity golf tournament this summer?
不，去年死了很多人 No, too many people died last year.
所以我们不打算... So we're not gonna do--
对不起，对不起 Sorry. Sorry.
他们命名为圣地亚哥 They named it San Diego.
德文的意思是指鲸鱼的阴道 Which in German means, "a whale's vagina."
这是我听过最荒谬的事 This is the most ridiculous thing ever.
# Carry on, my wayward son #
# There'll be peace when you are done #
# Lay your weary head to rest #
# Don't you cry #
# Don't you cry no more #
我们令他无话可说，真好 Way to handle him. That was nice.
第一(痾尿)当然是最好 It sure is good to be number one.
那当然比他妈的第二(痾屎)好 It sure beats the hell out of number two.
我们都在笑！ We are laughing!
而我们是好朋友 And we are very good friends.
好伙伴分享特别的一刻 Good buddies sharing a special moment.
不要再说了，威，随其自然吧 Don't say anything, Ron. Just let it happen.
我们都在笑，享受我们的友谊 We're laughing, enjoying our friendship.
总有一天，我们回想起时会感到很快乐 And someday we'll look back on this with much fondness.
对 Yeah.
炮弹来了！ Cannonball!
( cheering )
是的，这些家伙是真正的新闻组成员 Narrator: Yes, these fellas were a real news team.
伯甘蒂，当然是，中梁砥柱 Burgundy, of course, was the foundation, the rock.
但每个成员也有各自特殊的作用 But each member brought their own special something to the equation.
人们叫我布莱恩 People call me the Bri-man.
我负责时尚版块 I'm the stylish one of the group.
我知道你们要问什么 I know what you're asking yourself,
答案是肯定的，我的命根的确有个绰号 and the answer is yes, I have a nickname for my penis.
叫八角边 It's called the Octagon.
我也给睾丸起诨名 But I also nicknamed my testes.
左边的是詹姆士 My left one is James Westfall,
右边的是肯尼思 and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater.
女士们今晚可能有活动了 You ladies play your cards right, you might get to meet the whole gang.
放电的时候来了 Bang, boom, they were showing lasers
每周五晚上 every Friday night.
我所报道的，全部都是娱乐 Champ here. I'm all about havin' fun.
来两份鸡尾酒 You know, get a couple of cocktails in me,
在厨房起火 start a fire in someone's kitchen.
或许去海边，脱掉短裤 Maybe go to SeaWorld, take my pants off.
不管怎么说 Anyway, I've become kind of famous
因为我的一句「晦气！」，一举成名 for my signature catchphrase, "Whammy!"
好比，「间张（牌语）… As in, "Gene Tenace at the plate...
晦气！」 and whammy!"
晦气！ Whammy!
( sniffs )
我是布里克．坦兰德 I'm Brick Tamland.
人们喜欢我是因为我礼貌 People seem to like me because I am polite
我很守时 and I'm rarely late.
我喜欢吃冰淇淋 I like to eat ice cream,
我很喜欢度假 and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks.
数年后医生就会告诉我 Years later, a doctor will tell me
我的智商只有48 that I have an lQ of 48
就像人们常说的 and am what some people call
「智障」 "mentally retarded."
哈罗！ Ron: Hello!
噢！ - Whoo! Marco! - Polo!
玩的开心么？ - Brian. - You having a good time?
- 我玩的很开心 - 那再加我一个吧 - I'm having a great time. - That makes two of us.
你一定要来认识一下这个女孩 You've gotta meet this girl.
她以前是啦啦队长 She used to be a Charger cheerleader, but she broke her pelvis.
香瑞，来认识一下朗·伯甘蒂 Sherri, meet Ron Burgundy.
- 嘿，朗 - 哈罗 - Hey, Ron. - Hello.
我有个很惊人的消息要告诉你 - I've got a big story for you. - Mm-hmm.
就在这里 And it's right here.
哈罗 Well, hello.
真是傻瓜 You pointed to your boobies.
你才是！ Oh, my God, you did!
- 朗·伯甘蒂？ - 什么？ - Ron Burgundy? - Yes?
当我还是小孩时就崇拜你了 I have had a crush on you since I was a little girl.
我们换个地方 Let's go somewhere.
我要告诉你，这样再好不过了 I'm telling you, it don't get no better than this.
同样的聚会我们都来了12年了 We've been coming to the same party for 12 years,
总是这么压抑 and in no way is that depressing.
啊 Ahh.
要让我们自己放电吧 # Gonna make our own lightning #
香瑞，她让我心动了 # Yeah, she got the way to move me, Cherry #
她揪住了我的心 # She got the way to groove me #
香瑞，宝贝 # Cherry, baby #
她让我心动了 # She got the way to move me #
她揪住了我的心… # She got the way to groove me... #
以宙斯名义起誓！ By the beard of Zeus!
失陪 Excuse me.
朗，你去哪？你疯了么？朗！ Ron, where you going? What, are you crazy? Ron!
如果你到达基线，记得要回本垒！ If you're coming down the baseline, you gotta take home plate from me!
好，我先走了！ So there I go, head first, boom!
找不到她了 I've lost her.
噢 Ohh.
哈罗 Hello.
希望我没有打扰到你 Hope I'm not disturbing you, but, uh,
我刚才看到你 I saw you from across the party, and, uh,
我很少这样的，但我确实想告诉你 I don't usually do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something.
你有… You have...
让人很注目的… an absolutely breathtaking...
臀部 heinie.
我是说，很性感 I mean, that thing is good.
我想同它交个朋友 I want to be friends with it.
显然你很会讨好女人 Well, you certainly know how to compliment a woman.
现在，可否冒昧打扰 Now, if you'll excuse me.
你知道我是谁么？ Do you know who I am?
不，我不知道 No, I can't say that I do.
我不知道怎么说 I don't know how to put this,
但我的确是大人物 but I'm kind of a big deal.
是么？ Really?
人们都认得我 People know me.
真为你高兴 I've very happy for you.
我是重要人物 I'm very important.
我有… I have...
很多精装本的藏书 many leather-bound books,
我的公寓 and my apartment
有贵族气息 smells of rich mahogany.
我还是穆林．奥尔森的朋友 I-- I'm friends with Merlin Olsen, too.
他有时会来探访 He comes over on occasion.
真是枯燥 That's stupid.
不，不…很有意思 No, no, that's... very exciting.
听著，我可以… Listen, can l--
再来一次么？ can I start over again?
当然 Sure.
我想在这里坦白一些事情 I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there.
如果你喜欢，那么就请你接受 If you like it, you can take it.
如果你不喜欢，直接回绝就可以了 If you don't, send it right back.
恩 Mm-hmm.
我想上你 I wanna be on you.
等等，等等 Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
我… I--
我想上你 I wanna be on you.
( humming )
Yoo-hoo! ( clears throat )
巴克斯特！ Baxter!
爸爸回来了 Papa's home.
你这小家伙原来在这里 There he is. There's my little man.
你还好吧？ - You're okay? - ( barking )
当然，我今晚碰到了一位女士 Of course I met a lady tonight.
( growls )
说实话，这位确实与众不同 This one was different. I have to be honest.
真是疯狂的聚会 Oh, that was one crazy party.
我都快挂了 I am hung over.
告诉我 Tell me about it.
我今早醒来 I woke up this morning
撞见了松鼠 and I shit a squirrel.
我是说真的 I mean it. Literally.
该死的，竟然还是活的 Hell of it is, damn thing's still alive.
然后我就开始 So I got this shit-covered squirrel
在办公室四处找 down there in the office.
真不知道该怎么说 Don't know what to name it.
对不起 I'm sorry, Champ.
我想我把你的巧克力松鼠吃掉了 I think I ate your chocolate squirrel.
好了，伙计们，开会 All right, guys. Let's focus up.
早上好 Morning, everyone.
这是我们今天将要讨论的问题 Here are the stories we're going to be chasing today.
- 不，当然不是 - No, of course not.
- 只是公事往来 - 好极了 - Strictly professional. - Wonderful.
好 - Hmm. - Great.
我要接你么 Shall I pick you up
8:00?
Mm, 9:00.
( clears throat )
楼下？ Downstairs?
伯甘蒂，你完全勃起了 Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection.
真的么？ Really? ( laughs )
哦，是的… Yes, I do. Um...
真抱歉… I'm sorry, it's the--
是裤子褶皱 - it's the pleats. - Mm.
只是错觉而已 It's actually an optical illusion.
是裤子的款式 It's the pattern on the pants.
这不是故意拍马屁 It's not flattering in the crotchal region.
我马上就收回 I'm actually taking them back right now.
收回原处 Taking them back to the pants store.
真是尴尬 Oh, this is awkward.
我要走动… I'm gonna walk--
解决这个问题 I'm gonna walk this situation off
回头见，没有什么好看的 and I will see you later. Nothing to look at.
大家都工作 Go back to work, everyone.
不要装做你们不在意 Don't act like you're not impressed.
现在不要看我 Don't look at me right now.
我回办公室 I'm walking around the office.
我新的走路方式 My new walk.
我现在有情况，要走开 I have a situation right now I'm trying to walk off.
维罗妮卡．考宁斯通，她只是… Okay, and Veronica Corningstone, she's just--
她早盼著辞掉工作 she's just dying to quit her job
这样她就可以照顾我和孩子们 so that she can take care of me and have babies.
( door opening, closing )
嘿 Hey, gang.
爸爸回来了 Papa's home.
喔，亲爱的 Oh, honey.
真高兴你回来了 I am so glad you're home.
我可爱的宝贝 My alabaster doll.
先生们 Gentlemen.
你们气色不错 You look great.
不要偷看！ No eye contact!
( laughs )
亲爱的 Oh, darling.
我整天都在准备晚餐 I've spent all day cleaning your Emmys
清理房间 and preparing dinner in the nude.
我们先来亲热吧 Oh, let's make whoopie.
然后我要同新闻组的同事们去办事两天 And then I'm going to go drinking with the news team for two days.
好极了！ Wonderful. Wonderful!
噢！ Ow!
咬吧！ Bite it! Bite it!
对！ - Oh, yes! - Oh, yeah!
你真是坏家伙 You are a bad boy.
我是坏，我需要去总部 I'm bad. I need to go to the principal's office.
我爱我的生活 I love my life.
我们昨晚播音的收视率 It looks like our broadcast last night
似乎猛增了两个点 received a two-point ratings boost,
所以我们通过了如下决定 and the decision has been passed down
让维罗尼卡作我们的副主播 to make Veronica our co-anchor.
- 什么？ - 不，不！ - What? - No. No!
不！ No!
- 不！ - 不！ - No! - No!
- 不！ - 太好了 - No! - This is wonderful.
艾德，过来，你真是傻得可爱，你真是傻得可爱 Ed, come here, you big silly man. You big silly man.
- 终于成功了 - 这是什么啊，业余时间？ - We did it. - What is this, amateur hour?
- ∮ 灿烂的阳光啊，今天别傻了… ∮ - 他妈的！ - # Sunshine, go away today... # - Damn it!
∮ 我不太想跳舞 ∮ # I don't feel much like dancing #
∮ 有人走了，他要去经历我的生活 ∮ # Some man's gone, he's trying to run my life #
∮ 不知道他在要求什么 ∮ # Don't know what he's asking #
∮ 他告诉我最好协调好一切 ∮ # When he tells me I better get in line #
∮ 我却无法听到他说的话 ∮ # I can't hear what he's sayin' #
∮ 我长大后我要让它归我所有 ∮ # When I grow up I'm gonna make it mine #
∮ 这不值得… ∮ # These ain't dues... #
布赖恩没有告诉你们 What Brian didn't tell you
那不是真的海盗 was that those were not real pirates.
- 尽管他们看起来令人信服 - 噢，不错 - They looked convincing, though. - Oh, yes.
好了，各位收看4频道新闻的观众 Well, for all of us here at Channel 4 News,
我是朗·伯甘蒂 I'm Ron Burgundy.
保持优雅，圣迭戈 You stay classy, San Diego.
感谢收看 And thanks for stopping by.
主要是要保持优雅 But mainly stay classy.
- 感谢收看 - 保持优雅，我是朗·伯甘蒂 - Thanks for stopping by. - Stay classy, I'm Ron Burgundy.
- 感谢收看 - 保持优雅 - Thanks for stopping by. - Stay classy.
朗·伯甘蒂 - Ron Burgundy. - ( clears throat )
你真是个贱人，我要当众侮辱你 You are a real hooker, and I'm gonna slap you in public.
( chuckles )
你阴毛真多啊 You have way too much pubic hair.
事实上，这也是引以为豪之处 Actually, that's a point of pride.
我很得意有棕色的阴毛，所以感谢你 I'm very proud of my mane of pubic hair, so thank you.
你的乳房也蛮大 You have man boobs. ( chuckling )
瞧你那张下流的、妓女的嘴巴 You've got a dirty, whorish mouth.
我要插到你的子宫 I'm gonna punch you in the ovary.
- 直捣花心 - 呜，嗷 - A straight shot. - Ooh, ow.
直接抵达子宫 Right to the baby-maker.
啊，爵士长笛是漂亮男孩用的 Ah, jazz flute is for little fairy boys.
不错，知道吗？不必那样 Okay, you know what? That's uncalled for.
我无法和这个女人共事了，太恐怖了 I can't work with this woman. It's terrible.
朗？朗！我不想事情变成这样 Ron? Ron! I never wanted it to be like this.
我无法相信你居然这样对我！你高兴了吗？ I can't believe you did this to me! Are you happy?
不，朗，我没有！只是开个玩笑 No, Ron, I'm not! It was supposed to be a joke.
我是说，还是比较好笑 I mean, it's still kind of funny.
但却并非那样 But it's not.
我一无所有了！一无所有！ I have nothing left! Nothing!
我沦为了所有人的骂料！ I've been reduced to rubble!
你难道不知道我绝不会说「操」这个词的吗？ Don't you know I would never say the word fuck?
我他妈绝不会说的！ I would never fucking ever fucking say that!
绝不会！ Ever!
我们走，这些人会撕了你 Let's go. These people are about to pull you apart.
抱歉，别碰他，你这个贱货！ I'm sorry. Get your hands off him, you bastards!
你难道不知道我绝不会说「操」这个词的吗？ Don't you know I would never say fuck?
- 操！ - 快走 - Fuck! - Move.
不！不！ No! No!
伯甘蒂先生，你应该感到愧疚 Mr. Burgundy, you should be ashamed of yourself.
- 拜托，我… - 你真是个烂人！ - Please, l-- - You're an awful man!
你让我们彻底地失望，伯甘蒂先生！ You are truly a disappointment to us all, Mr. Burgundy!
（旁白）鲍勃．戴兰写道 Narrator: Bob Dylan once wrote,
「时间能改变一切」 "The times, they are a-changin'."
朗·伯甘蒂从未听过这首歌 Ron Burgundy had never heard that song.
所以他一旦跌倒，就跌得很惨 So when he fell, he fell hard.
（报幕员）下面是4频道的6:00新闻！ Announcer: It's Channel 4 News at 6:00!
喂，我是朗 Hello, this is Ron.
喂 Hello.
谁啊？我在，喂 Who's there? I'm talking. Hello.
你是谁？ Who is this?
巴克斯特，是你吗？ Baxter, is that you?
巴克斯特！ Baxter!
如果你在米尔沃基就叫两声 Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee.
是维尔特．张伯伦吗？ Is this Wilt Chamberlain?
鼓起勇气说话啊，喂！ Have the courage to say something. Hello!
喂！ Hello!
( yells )
噢，迪诺，谢谢你让我来这儿 Oh, Tino, thank you for letting me come in here.
很高兴我还能吃得很香 I'm glad I can still get a good meal.
是的不错，给你，厨师给你特别准备的 Yeah sure. Here you are, the chef made this special for you.
就像你骂我们的城市一样把它吃掉 You eat that for the way you talk about my city.
我不吃 I will not eat that.
你一定要吃掉这个猫屎 You're going to eat that cat poo.
我不吃猫屎 I will not eat cat poop.
- 一定要吃 - 朗·伯甘蒂说不吃！ - You will eat cat poo. - Ron Burgundy says no!
你愚弄了我以及这儿的所有人 You make a fool of me and everyone here.
快把它吃进嘴里 You put that cat poo in your mouth.
- 不！ - 快！ - No! - Yes!
- 不！ - 吃了它！ - No! - S?
- 我不吃猫屎 - 你快吃了它！ - I will not eat cat poop. - You will do it immediately!
- 不！ - 你必须吃！ - No! - You will!
- 好，我试试看… - 吃进去 - Fine, I'll try to eat one-- - Get in there.
要是我咬一口，你会给我块牛排吗？ If I take one bite will you get me a steak?
要是我咬一口，你会给我块牛排吗？ If I take one bite of shit will you bring me a steak?
我可以给你。 I'll think about it.
对了，吃进去 Yeah, get in there.
- 是的，坚持 - 我很饿 - Yeah, start with the end. - I am so hungry.
- 吃啊 - 噢，上帝！ - There. - Oh God!
牛排，给他块牛排 A steak. A big steak for him, please.
不！我已经咬一口了 No! I had one bite.
- 够了 - 婊子养的 - That's not enough. - Son of a bitch.
你想这样？ - You like this? - ( Ron crying )
噢，别哭，别哭 Oh, don't cry. Don't cry.
他没有哭，没有哭 He's not crying. He's not crying.
- 别在我这儿哭… - 我会吃掉这些屎，我不在乎了 - Don't cry in my-- - I'll eat the shit. I don't care.
我要把这些屎都吃掉 I'll eat the entire hunk of shit.
好了，吃完它 Okay, just finish it up.
你现在感觉好点了吗？ Don't you feel better now?
嘿，看着点，先生 Hey, you watch yourself, mister.
嗨，红帽女士，是的 Hey, lady in the red hat. Yeah.
真难闻 You smell.
( groaning )
伙计们，伙计们，是我啊，朗啊 Guys. Guys, it's me, Ron.
伙计！ Fellas!
哈金说要是我们和你说话，就解雇我们 Harken said he'd fire us if we talked to you.
- 什么？ - 真抱歉 - What? - I'm sorry.
我…布赖恩！ I-- Brian!
- 我是朗啊！ - 朗！ - It's Ronnie! - Ron!
- 查普！ - 朗！ - Champ! - Ron!
查普，走吧，走吧！ Champ, come on. Come on!
走吧，布里克 Go, Brick.
亲爱的布里克 My sweet Brick.
布里克，过来抱抱我，我知道你愿意的 Brick, come hug me. I know you want to.
我真是可怜透顶了，圣迭戈！ Ron: I am completely miserable, San Diego!
真他妈的热！ It's so damn hot!
不应该选择喝牛奶！ Milk was a bad choice!
三个月后