Subtitles by explosiveskull
- What is your favorite food, Ulrik? - Ice cream.
Do the rest of you like ice cream as well? Yes, of course!
- What about you? - I love broccoli.
What do you mean? I have a best friend...
- Hi. - Good to see you again.
Finally!
- Did you miss me that much? - Yes.
It's nice, right?
How did you like the hotel?
- The hotel? - Yes. Did you like it?
Well... It's a bit tacky, maybe.
Okay, tacky...
Suddenly, it's not good enough for the little princess?
- Well, yes... - Yes.
Maybe just a bit...
- They played the cheese song. - The cheese song?
Roquefort, Emmental and Gorgonzola I'll pay anything
I just invested a shitload of money in it.
- I think they make good money. - I damn well hope so.
It's nice to be here.
- And Bobby? Was everything okay? - Yes.
Good. Thanks, babe. Welcome to the family.
Thanks.
- Mom, look at me. I'm a crocodile. - Dangerous crocodile!
Oh, you look mean!
- Hey, honey. - Hi, honey.
- Fuck, this is sweet. - Totally.
- Did he build it himself? - Yep. From scratch.
Be careful not to get sunburned, Karsten.
Good dog, Musse!
Those.
- Whoa. - They're just the ones I liked best.
I promised. I keep my promises.
Shit. You are a true princess, eh?
I'd better load some more onto the next shipment.
You know that emeralds are more expensive than diamonds?
- They are? - A lot.
So I think I've found myself a lady with taste.
- Thanks. - Are you happy?
- Can we afford them? - Of course.
- They're a little ladylike. - Hey, here she comes.
- No way, honey! - You look so good.
What did you do, Michael? Did you splash out?
They are damn neat. Can I touch them?
- Can I borrow them sometime? - Are they brilliants?
- Enough. Come on. - You're so beautiful, man!
Come on, Sascha. Come on, Bo!
Yeah, go!
Come on, Karsten!
Come on!
Guess, I'm getting it now. Mastic. And...
This one's called "fool". I want that. Can I have some fool?
There you go.
Sascha, your turn. Sascha!
Sascha, it's your turn.
What's going on here? Please turn down the music.
You're disturbing everyone here at the beach.
Everyone here is on vacation and want to relax. Please turn down the music.
Michael, what is he saying?
Turn down the music. We've paid a fortune for this vacation.
- I think he likes my swimming trunks. - Do you like his trunks? Dirty old man!
Turn off the music.
- If you don't do it, I will... - Stop!
- Nice one. - Shot him. Shoot, shoot!
Fuck off! Bye, bye.
- And he buggers off to his boyfriend. - What an idiot.
That's not yours. You little thieving girl.
We haven't been lucky with her. Have we?
- I heard that, Bo. - Sure.
- What are you doing? Stop! - You're going to pay for that.
Don't you have something I can throw at her?
Here's an onion for you!
- That's fucking nice. - No, stop. Stop it!
- Who's that? Anyone know him? - Shut up. It's work.
Ladies and gentlemen. The bar will open now.
And it's happy hour!
That's sick.
I think happy hour is mostly around here.
Christ, it's good.
I feel like dancing. Come on, let's dance.
I mixed a little luxury drink for you.
I have to. That's all well and good.
The shipment will be around 2.5 million, right?
We can handle that.
And if we transfer 500,000 now -
- then they'll receive a down payment of three million.
And then we take the rest of the money from the white account...
That will be fine. No problem.
- Don't you think? - Yes. I've got it under control.
That's cool. We'll do that.
Look. I have a suggestion.
- What kind of fish is this? - Sea bass.
- Is it like cod? - No.
The texture is quite delicious, buttery.
You have to work hard to make cod like that.
- You want this boiled cock? - I want that, if it's pee.
It was in your honor, Bo, you old fisherman.
This is damn classy.
I mean big fish, small fish, octopuses and the cock.
- Japanese porn fillets. - Don't touch it, Musse.
- Don't play with the food, Tanja. - Seriously, there's white goo inside.
I just saw an acquaintance. I'll just go say hello.
You would have been dead.
It's one of many occasions when I should have been dead!
Don't you want some food, Emil? Come on.
Do you want some raw fish?
- Maybe they have fries. - Can we order him some fries?
Of course.
That's not a problem, Karsten. You can talk with food in your mouth.
Karsten, are you on your period? Do you need to change your tampon?
You have to talk with food in your mouth. Otherwise, you can't talk.
- Who was that? - I met them in the ice cream shop.
- You don't waste any time, eh? - No.
I'm hungry. And it tastes damn good.
- Want one? - No thanks.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Bam! He died right on the spot.
Jump starter!
Sure, I hit a little hard. But what was I supposed to do?
- Did you revive him? - Yes.
He was alive and kicking five minutes later. What the hell.
- They have to learn to behave! - You have so many tall tales.
Cheers, Michael. It's a pleasure to be here with you.
Another time, this guy came in. He had a suitcase with 27 knives.
She's cute, huh?
- You can have a private show with her. - I wouldn't dare.
Don't worry. It'll pass.
Everything passes with time.
And then we're just dead.
Remember that.
Stop that shit. Musse, stop!
Do you have it? Do you have it?
Ah, okay. You don't need to see that.
- Your turn. I'll hold that. - Yes. Out of my way.
Mama bear! Well done.
It's in the direction you come from, Torba.
Yes, Torba, backwards, ahead.
Hey, hey! The shawl. The shawl, shawl.
The shawl.
The wheel of the scooter... The shawl, tie it!
Good bye.
- Can you do a handstand, Musse? - Yes.
- Shall I show you? - Yes. Can you do it?
You have to eat it now.
But I'm not hungry.
Don't you like it?
That's a first.
- No! - What?
Something must have happened. He didn't show up.
What are you doing here, then? What the hell are you doing here?
- I'm sorry, Michael. - You might have lead the police here.
All the girls are here, dammit!
- What the hell, Michael? - Come down here.
Don't, Michael...
What's happening? Is Michael going berserk?
- Come here! - No, no, no...
Musse, don't move. And listen to Michael, all right?
- Should we go in there? - Hell, no. Come here, honey.
- Are you sure? - Yes. Come. Go inside.
Stop whining, Musse.
I'll turn it up a bit.
- That looks good. - Do you want one?
Can I? I would like that.
- Thanks. - You're welcome.
- Did you give Tanja one? - No.
- Can I have one? Thanks. - You're welcome.
Give him a kick in the belly. It needs to hurt.
Tanja, can't you make a bomb?
- I need to make a bomb. - How many times?
- You've talked too much. - I've stopped talking.
Don't be sad.
Don't.
It hurts. It hurts!
Stop it.
- Musse, you know I'm picky with gifts. - The King gets a present for a king.
- Is it a lighter? - No, no.
There! It's a jack-knife. A one-hand jack-knife, man.
That's actually pretty... It's cool.
You can open it with one hand. So if somebody gets in your face -
- you take it out of your pocket, and you're ready to go.
- It's cool. You have good taste. - Thanks!
- Uh-oh. Now what? - That's for me.
- You bet. - That's cool, Musse.
That's a Turkish brandy. I was in this shop -
- thinking about whether to give you whisky, vodka...
But you've tasted it all. Then the Turkish guy tells me:
"Give him that. That's what we drink." Does it taste good?
- Damn good. - He said it was the best.
- Thanks, Musse. - No problem, man.
Here you go.
- For the young lady. - Thank you so much.
Oh my.
Do you like it? It's the one you wore that got fucked up.
- Well spotted, Musse. - Thank you, Musse. Thank you.
- Don't mention it. It looks good. - Musse.
I'm impressed.
That is...
I have something for you as well. When you fuck up, you get punished.
- I'm sorry I fucked up... - Shut your hole.
You didn't fuck up now, did you? So this is for you.
- A gift for me? - I'm serious. It's for you. Come on.
You can get a few champagne bubble baths for that money.
- No... - Yes, yes.
All of it isn't for me. Is it?
Yes. When you do things right, you get rewarded.
Musse just got fucking rich! Is it all for me?
- No, man. Hey! - All right. Yes.
- Fucking thanks. - You've earned it. I mean it.
- Do things right. - I will. That won't happen again.
You can thank the man over there. He just saved your ass.
It's okay, Musse.
Thank you, Bo. I'm sorry I fucked up. Thanks for having my back.
I appreciate it, man.
Yes! It's karaoke time. Fucking karaoke! Yeah.
I fixed it! Are you ready?
Time for some serious singing! Jens, Jens.
- Jens, Jens, Jens...! - Jens, Jens, Jens...
You have to sing, man. It's karaoke!
Come on! You have to sing karaoke.
- Come on. Jens, come on, man! - That's it, Jens.
Come on. Over here. There's a gigantic selection of songs.
Shit.
What's this?
- Don't you want to sing too? - Hell no.
I'm a technical genius, man. You choose that one?
- Are you ready? - Yes.
Are you good to go? And you're on!
- That's awesome. - A fucking classic!
- Come on, Jens! - Bring it on.
Call it love Call it whatever you want
No words exist That are quite good enough
So call it whatever you want
Don't tell me what to do
Tell me about yourself if you dare
Give me a free choice And a heart I can touch
Give a chance By speaking before you go
What's left unsaid Doesn't stand a chance
Call it love Call it whatever you want
No words exist That are quite good enough
So call it whatever you want
The two of us Can survive almost anything
Except the things That were left unsaid
Don't hold me hostage, take all of me I need to be naked to love
The dream that remains a dream Is a lie
Call it love Call it whatever you want
No words exist That are quite good enough
So call it whatever you want
- They're making out! - What a crying shame.
Lovebirds! Get a room.
- What's up, Michael? - Musse? This is the shit, Musse!
- How did you fix it? - It was just the wires...
I have to be by myself But I still want you
I want a gift No bargain, no debt
It's too easy To switch from love to hate
Let's try to keep them apart
Call it love Call it whatever you want
No words exist That are quite good enough
So call it whatever you want
Call it love. Call it whatever you want.
He's saying that he thinks you're a bit.... You're a bit...
Are you serious about this guy?
- He's saying I do get a lot of pussy. - This is getting cozier and cozier.
- Where did you meet the blond guy? - In the ice cream shop.
- How many times have you met? - Once or twice.
Once? Twice? Get your story straight.
Did you get his number? How did you know he was on that boat?
Is that him?
- Tomas? Yes. - "Yes. Tomas. Yes."
Come over here.
Stand there.
- Take off your panties. - Now?
Yes, now. What do you think?
What a fucking homo.
Tomas?
I want to marry this girl. She can put naughty photos in my lunch box.
You shouldn't marry a girl like that.
Why are you saying this, bro? She is exactly the woman to marry.
Why does God reward a prisoner with such pictures?
It's not about God. If you rob a bank, you can have the girls on your tail too.
- It's not too late for a career change. - I'm still thinking about it.
But don't forget, it's our duty to...
Good evening. How may I help you?
- What was that? - Did you see her naked feet?
Should we arrest her because she's barefoot on a summer's day?
- Right. - I think she was high.
It's disgusting. Move this.
What's happening?
Karsten, have you wrung this?
Have you wrung it? There's blood everywhere.
Damn it. Give me that bag. Give it to me.
We have to finish this!
What's up, bathing beauties? You look wonderful.
- Come on, Michael. - Daddy here's coming.
- But I'm the dealer. - Ready?
- It ought to be an advantage. - A three double somersault.
- You turn it in a while. - Okay. Was it 200?
Bo, I need some space.
- You coming or what? - Of course. I'll do my dive.
- Come on, boss! - Is that a swimming ring, Bo?
Come on, Michael.
- What a guy! - Cool.
You look really great in those trunks, Bo.
- What's up, princess? - Not a lot.
Subtitles by explosiveskull