纳什维尔欢迎你们 理查德哈蒙德 詹姆斯梅 杰里米"克拉克逊"
三辆车依次为 庞提亚克二代firebird，福特f-100，林肯大陆 mark VI 与TG美国特辑S09E03的选车非常类似
感谢TG老翻译 洪亮狗豆 技术援助
翻译 Monica-卡 oliver LXBenz
翻译 莽昕 InX 小老虎新疆
时间轴 Monica-卡
校对 Monica-卡 莽昕 InX ockrazor Natas 清野
压制 清野
谢谢 Thank you.
大家好 欢迎收看Grand Tour The Grand Tour Hello, and welcome to The Grand Tour,
这个星期我们来到了纳什维尔 which this week comes to you from Nashville!
就是这里 - There it is.
这是个 这个城市是以纳什将军命名 It was er... It's a city that was named after General Nash.
战争英雄 把英国佬赶出了这里 Big war hero, kicked the British out.
他把 - He got er...
你们最后是独立了 那也没怎么样嘛 You ended up with independence. And how's that working out for you?
我这么问只是因为前不久我们在 I only ask because we were looking the other day
看这些日子里美国最畅销的车 at the bestselling cars in America these days.
这些是前五 This is the top five.
仔细看看 这就是所谓的独立 挺好的嘛 There you go, that's independence... working well.
丰田 本田 丰田 日产 本田 Toyota, Honda, Toyota, Nissan, Honda.
那这段时间底特律究竟都造了什么 So what is actually made in Detroit these days, then?
估计 他们就是种些有机豆子吧 Er... Well, mostly they just grow sustainable organic peas beans
好比是一些留着腋毛的女人种甘蓝菜 - It's just women with armpit hair growing kale.
这就是他们干的事了 That's all that's going on there--
市政社区农场 municipal farms for the community.
我们之所以来到纳什维尔 Now, the reason we've come to Nashville
事实上很简单 is very simple, in fact.
因为我走遍了美国50个州 It's because I've been to all 50 of the US states,
但从没来过这里 but I'd never been here before.
这里实在太棒了 And what a town!
是啊 - Yeah.
-喜欢它 -谁知道呢 Love it. Who knew?
-我们爱它 -谁知道呢 - We are loving it. - Who knew?
这里是个好地方 我们爱这里 It is a great place, we're loving it,
音乐也很赞 and the music is amazing.
爱死那个了 - Loving that... very much.
-好吧 -怎么了 Well... What?
-算不上 -伙计 你不能 - Not really. - Mate, you can't...
这里可是美国的音乐之城 This is known as Music City USA.
-没错吧 -我不觉得 它不是 - That's what it is. - But it isn't, is it?
底特律才是 Because Detroit is.
哦不 听着 不 Oh, no. Listen... No.
它是 - (JEERING) - It is.
摩城 摩城 Motown... Motown
只是三分种热度的疯人疯语 is just three minutes of jangly nonsense.
-哦够了 哈蒙德 -它是 - Oh, come on, Hammond! - It is!
哈蒙德 它就不是 Hammond, it just isn't!
你不能说 You cannot possibly say that.
乡村和西乐 Country and western music
是为了让你痛苦 is designed to make you miserable.
摩城音乐是为了使你快乐 Motown is designed to make you happy.
不 他说的绝对是对的 摩城音乐是更加快乐的音乐 No, he's absolutely right. Motown is happier music.
我是说 听些像 I mean, take something like
玛莎·里夫斯的"在街上跳舞" 好吗 Martha Reeves "Dancing In The Streets", OK?
听听字里行间中有多快乐 Listen to how happy the words are.
"每个仔 带个妞 世界各地到处有" "Every guy, grab a girl, everywhere around the world."
这不就是特朗普叫我们做的事吗 Isn't that what Donald was telling us to do?
没错 不是吗 他确实如此 Well, he was, wasn't he? He did. He did.
不 他说的是 "每个仔 摸个妞" No, he said, "Every guy, grope a girl."
这截然不同 - A very different thing.
底特律不仅只有摩城音乐 鲍勃·西格也来自这里 Detroit isn't just Motown. Bob Seger's from Detroit.
这只是家庭妇女们的音乐 It's just housewives' music.
-泰德•纽金特 -疯子 - Ted Nugent - Mad!
-伊基·波普 -荒唐至极 - Iggy Pop. - Ridiculous.
-麦当娜 -讨厌 - Madonna. - Annoying.
-阿姆 -不会唱 - Eminem. - Can't sing.
-艾利斯·库柏 -也很荒唐 - Alice Cooper. - Ridiculous again.
-老鹰乐队中的一半 -哪一半 - Half of The Eagles. - Which half?
-格伦·弗雷 -我不喜欢那一半 - Glenn Frey. - I don't like that half.
纳什维尔 好吧还有谁是这里的人 麦莉·赛勒斯 Nashville. Right, what's come out of here? Miley Cyrus.
太棒了 Brilliant!
-你刚在电视上大声说了出来 -没错 - You just said that out loud on television. - I did.
还有 还有阿尔曼兄弟乐队 And... And The Allman Brothers.
从没听过 - Never heard of them.
你有 You have.
阿尔曼兄弟乐队 The Allman Brothers,
原TG主题曲的旋律出自 The Allman Brothers的Jessica
他们有只单曲 they had that one hit, instrumental.
-那叫什么来着 -杰西卡 - What was it called? MAN: Jessica.
-詹妮弗 - Jennifer. - (LAUGHTER)
哦不 我讨厌那个 Oh, I hated that.
再也不听不到了 是吗 You never hear it any more, do you?
不会 垃圾 No. Rubbish.
真奇怪 Weirdest thing.
太奇怪 Weirdest thing.
-哦你好 -有条信息 - Oh, hello. - A message.
哦抱歉 Oh, sorry.
这是来自威尔曼先生的信息 This is a message from Mr Wilman.
我们有点跑题了 We've gone a bit off topic.
他可能生气了 是有点跑题 He might be cross. We have a bit.
确实有件事关于汽车 我们应该讨论 There is a car thing here we ought to talk about.
它叫做"煤老滚" 你们知道这个吗 It's called coal rolling. Are you familiar with this?
它起源于一项运动 It has its origins in a sport
人们开着皮卡车到田间 where people go with their pickup trucks into a field
看谁能拖最重的东西 and see who can tow the heaviest thing.
-是的 -这里有些片段 来看看 - Yep. Oh, yep. - We've got some footage here of it happening.
看 坐在皮卡车里拖着重物 Look at that! The man in a pickup truck towing a heavy thing.
就是这样 There you go.
在这活动里你绝不可能听到 Things you will never hear said at that event:
"快点小伙子 我要赶不上诗歌朗诵会了" "Got to rush, lads. I'm late for a poetry reading."
这是三号卡车 That's truck number three--
伯尼·桑德斯 各位 Bernie Sanders, everybody.
不管怎样 事情是这样的 他们发现 Anyway, the thing is, they worked out
如果他们刷新柴油引擎的ECU they could pull more heavy things
就能拉更重的东西 if they fiddled with the ECU on the diesel engines,
因为那样产生的马力会更大 because that would generate more power,
作为副产品 会排出更多的烟 and, as a by-product, more smoke,
因此这比赛才叫coal rolling cos that's why it's called coal rolling.
而现在 很多孩子在高速公路上做这个 And now, various kids have started to do it out on the highway.
他们到街上 What they do is go out on the street
在超过一辆丰田普锐斯的时候做这个 and then do it when they overtake a Toyota Prius.
看这个 让我们开始 Look at this. Here we go.
哦我的天 真的？哦 天哪 Oh, for God's sake! Really?! Oh, come on!
不是吧 Really?!
-现在 我 -这简直 - Now, I... - That's just...
我知道我不该说这个 I just... I know, I know I shouldn't say this.
但每当我超过普锐斯 But every time I overtake a Prius,
我总会想 "我可以用4档超车 I always think, "I could do this in fourth...
但还是用2档吧 "but I'm gonna use second instead
让他们更愤怒一点吧" to annoy them even more."
你清楚你现在已经56岁了吗 You do know you are 56 years old?
-我明白 但我的心理年龄只有9岁 -哦没错 - Yeah, but I've got a mental age of nine. - Oh, yeah.
-我们可以继续我们的节目了吗 -哦好吧 - Shall we get on with the show? - Yeah, it's time.
回到节目里 在我们这周的汽车节目里 On with the show. In our car show this week...
詹姆斯从日光浴躺椅上碾过 James runs over a sun lounger.
理查德喝了瓶啤酒 Richard has a beer.
我站在一个东西上 And I go on a thing.
天啊 Jesus!
不管怎样 在这之前 Anyway, before all that,
我们有过一场小争执 we've been having a bit of a debate.
我说过 你不需要买宝马M3 You see, I say you don't need to buy a BMW M3
因为少花九万二 你可以选择捷豹XE S because for £11,000 less you can have a Jaguar XE S,
而它更好开 which is nicer to drive,
更舒服而且一样快 more comfortable and just as fast.
-它并没有一样快 -它有 - It isn't just as fast. - Yes, it is.
-不它没有 -它们都能跑到250km/h - No, it isn't. - They both do 155mph.
那是因为宝马将速度锁在了250km/h Yes, because the BMW has been electronically limited to 155.
对于捷豹 那速度就是极限 The Jag is just... limited.
-不好意思打断一下 - Sorry to interrupt.
因为我的两个同事都错了 It's just that both my colleagues are wrong.
因为如果你想要一辆又小又快的轿车 Because if you want a small, fast saloon car,
你绝对应该拥有的是 what you absolutely have to have--
如果你要开始 If you're gonna start going on
说起阿尔法罗密欧Giulia Quadrifoglio about that Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio,
我就把这支笔插进你眼睛里 I am gonna stab you in the eye with this pen.
-不 他的确 -很多次 - No, he's-- - A number of times.
他是对的 阿尔法罗密欧已经30年 He's right. Alfa Romeo have not made a decent car
没造一辆好车了 for 30 years.
-嗯 -嗯个头 - Erm... - "Erm" nothing,
因为我们要回到重点上 because we need to get back to the point.
詹姆斯和我决定 James and I have decided
是时候让捷豹宝马分高下了 it was time to sort out this Jaguar-BMW debate
在苏格兰进行一场合适的老派道路测试 with a proper old-school road test in Scotland.
大家好 欢迎来到威尔士 Hello, and welcome to Wales,
我和所有的拍摄团队来到这里 where I've come with all of our film crews and this,
以及这辆崭新的阿尔法.罗密欧Giulia... Quadrifoglio the brand-new Alfa Romeo Giulia... Quadrifoglio.
应该是这么读 I think.
无所谓啦 Whatever.
让我们看看它究竟如何 Let's and see what's what.
如果它是辆典型的阿尔法罗密欧 Now, for this to be a proper Alfa Romeo,
它一定会有些毛病 there must be... something wrong with it.
试想 Think about it.
某人对母亲很孝顺 A person who's kind to his mother
准时 清醒又穿着得体 他就是奥迪 and punctual and sober and well-dressed, he's an Audi.
没人想要这样的朋友 And nobody wants a friend like that.
如果要和一辆车建立一段关系 If you're going to form a relationship with a car,
如果想建立一条纽带 if you're gonna develop a bond,
这车就需要有一些人格特质 it's got to have human qualities.
而如果它有这些 And if it's gonna have human qualities,
那它必定会有缺陷 it's got to have faults.
这辆车 我很高兴地说 有一个大问题 And this car, I'm delighted to say, has a big one.
我不知道他们是怎么设计这个的 I don't know quite how they've managed this,
但我不太容易下车 but it's not very easy to get out of.
这里有门柱 那里有方向盘 You've got this pillar here, then the wheel here,
这俩之间 and there isn't enough of a...
没有足够空间 of a gap between the two.
等一下 等等 Hang on a minute. Hang on.
瞧这多有"阿尔法罗密欧"的性格啊 How Alfa Romeo is that?
他们把门装错了位置 它应该在 They put the door in the wrong place. It should be...
它应该在更后面 It should be further back.
太牛了 That is brilliant.
还有更多 There's more, too.
这不是一辆很好看的车 It's not a particularly handsome car.
轮子太小了 The wheels are too small.
处于一些原因 And for some reason,
他们选择将车的前面 they've chosen to make the front
看上去像沃尔斯利 look like a Wolseley.
最近一段时间 詹姆斯说的很对 Now, in the recent past-- James is quite right--
阿尔法有他们的缺陷 Alfas have had their faults
也没有好的方面来弥补 and then no good bits to compensate.
他们只是用错驱动轮的菲亚特 They've just been wrong-wheel-drive Fiats
把"菲亚特"这个词划掉 with the word "Fiat" crossed out
再用蜡笔写上了"阿尔法罗密欧" and "Alfa Romeo" written in crayon.
那辆车 显然 That, though...
是完全不同的生物 ...that's a very different animal.
这车太棒了 This is a fabulous car,
如此伟大 an epic car.
大概因为它是法拉利458设计师的 Probably because it's the love child of the same man
溺子 who engineered the Ferrari 458.
他为它装上了碳纤维传动轴 He's given it a carbon-fibre propshaft,
碳纤维车顶 a carbon-fibre roof,
碳纤维引擎盖 a carbon-fibre bonnet,
一颗正经的限滑差速器 a proper limited-slip differential,
得心应手的转向 以及聪明的变速箱 telepathic steering and a clever gearbox.
但这车最令人叫绝的 But the most impressive bit of this car
是那台2.9升涡轮增压的V6发动机 is its turbocharged 2.9L V6 engine.
每当你关车门 发动机都会一起抖动 An engine that wobbles when you close the door.
厉害了 快看 That is brilliant. Look at that.
你家奥迪肯定没法这样吧 You don't get that sort of thing from an Audi, do you?
法拉利呢 Ferrari, which, of course,
与阿尔法罗密欧同属一个公司 is part of the same company as Alfa Romeo,
他们特别指出 is very keen to point out
这不是去掉两个汽缸的 that this is not the engine they use in the California
加利福尼亚上的那台引擎 with two cylinders removed.
他们说两台引擎纯属巧合 They say it's a complete coincidence
拥有同样的缸径冲程比和气缸夹角 that both engines have the same bore/stroke and V-angle.
他们坚持发动机是阿尔法罗密欧自己造的 They're adamant that this is all Alfa Romeo's own work.
所以呢 So, there we are.
我们信了 It is, then.
真是台好引擎啊 And what work it is.
503匹的马力 You get 503 brake horsepower.
这比宝马M3多出60匹 60匹啊 That is 60 more than you get from a BMW M3. 60!
比起那辆捷豹 It's 175 more
多出了175匹 than you get from that Jag
要不是我站出来力挽狂澜 that James would be droning on about now,
现在詹姆斯还在吹那破车 had I not stepped in and saved the day.
然后就是这车的转速 And then there's the way it revs.
哈 Ha!
大多数涡轮发动机到了高转都会有点虚 Most turbocharged engines are a bit wheezy at the top end,
但由于这车的双涡管涡轮 but because the twin-scroll turbo in this
在发动机的V字夹角处放置 is mounted in the V of the engine...
和法拉利的加利福尼亚一样 ...just like it is in a Ferrari California,
巧了 coincidentally,
转速一直到红区 the rev counter is still a blur
毫不拖沓 right up to the red zone.
这引擎真是 This engine is...
大师级的 ...it's a masterpiece.
太棒了 An absolute gem.
所以 这车或许长得像辆沃斯利 So, while this may look like a Wolseley,
跑起来可一点也不像 it certainly doesn't go like one.
它的极速可达到每小时307公里 It has a top speed, in fact, of 191mph.
这辆车 What this car is
其实就是法拉利的 is a Ferrari...
四门情趣诱惑版 ...wearing four-door sensi-panties.
说到这 我就要提这车的绝活了 And that brings me onto this car's party piece.
在常规时速下 这车非常安静平顺 At normal speeds, it's very quiet and very civilised.
即便这车的轮胎 And even though it's running on wheels
小的像是沙发底下的轮子一样 that appear to have come off the bottom of a sofa,
乘坐还是很舒服 it's very comfortable,
即便你按下这里 even if you push this,
让悬挂变硬 也不会不舒服 you put it in bumpy-suspension mode.
唯一我还没试过的模式 The only setting I haven't yet tried
就是这个赛道模式 is this one-- "race".
我觉得我该试试 But I think I should.
不幸的是 Sadly, however,
还没等我找到赛道 before I found somewhere to try it out,
我就接到了电话 I received a telephone call.
哦不 什么事？ Oh, no. What?
哈蒙德打来的 -你是把我们的摄制组劫走了吗 - Hammond. - Have you got our film crew somewhere?
-是的 -你们是在拍阿尔法吗 - Yes, I have. - Are you using them to film an Alfa?
-是的 -你现在在哪 - Yes, I am. - Where are you?
-威尔士 -威尔士?! - Wales. - Wales?!
你凭什么安排我们去苏格兰 You can't just arrange that we go to Scotland
然后自己去威尔士 and then disappear off to Wales.
我没告诉你们去苏格兰 I didn't tell you to go to Scotland.
是你们自己决定要去的 You decided to go to Scotland on your own.
我们大老远的跑到苏格兰 We've come all the way to Scotland
来做这两辆车的评测 to do this with these two cars.
明明说好了 你却硬要搞 This is the test. You trying to shoehorn...
我知道阿尔法罗密欧给这个世界带来了很多快乐 It's wonderful there are Alfa Romeos in the world.
我也知道这车非常值得我们喜爱 That's a lovely thing that we can all...
你个人觉得阿尔法罗密欧有多好 It doesn't matter how good you think
并不重要 这是汽车节目 the Alfa Romeo is. This is a car programme.
概念 希望 都是虚的 Concepts, dreams, imagining things.
苏格兰 两辆靠谱的 有价值的车 ...Scotland, with two cars that are credible, relevant,
万众瞩目的 能跑并且真实存在的车 important, work and are real.
当我和摄制组抵达赛道时 They were still shouting at me as I arrived
他俩还在那朝我哔哔 with all of the film crews at our track.
那块你十年来一直想要 ...itch, that you've managed to scratch
解开的心结 over the last ten years.
我就纳闷了 为啥 I don't know how. Why...
信号不行了 It's breaking up!
噢 我掉线了 Oh, I've lost you!
赛道模式 Race mode.
走起 Here we go.
在赛道模式下 一切都紧张了起来 In race mode, everything is in a tensed-up state:
油门响应 离合器换挡 转向 the throttle response, the gearbox, the steering.
而且牵引力控制系统关闭了 And the traction control is off!
这让它 This has now been transformed
从一辆好车 from something that was brilliant...
变成了一辆摄人心魄的车 into something that is sensational.
当然了 你平时肯定不会用到赛道模式 Of course, you'd never drive in race mode on the road,
就像你永远不会带着你的手表上太空 in the same way you'd never take your wristwatch into space.
但是知道它在太空也能用 心里会很爽 But it's nice to know that it would still work if you did.
这车也是如此 And this does.
这车无所不能 Oh, boy, this does.
我总会说 没拥有过一辆阿尔法罗密欧 I've always said you can't be a true petrolhead
你就不能算是个真车迷 until you've owned an Alfa Romeo.
但问题是 我其实一直都知道 And the trouble is, I've always known
当今没有一辆阿尔法罗密欧 there's no Alfa Romeo
能吸引真车迷去购买 a true petrolhead would actually want to buy.
但现在有了 There is now, though.
现真有了 Oh, there is now.
所以我决定做一件事 And so I decided to do something I've never done
这在我整个试车生涯中从没做过 with any car I've ever filmed in my entire life.
我决定 试车结束后 I decided, when the test was over,
去最近的阿尔法罗密欧经销商 to go to the nearest Alfa Romeo dealer...
买一辆回家 ...and buy one.
-咋了 -你个混蛋 - What? - You total cock.
你抢了我们的片子 You stole our film.
不能这么说吧 Well, not really.
你最后没真买一辆吧 You didn't actually buy one, did you?
没有 因为我没想好 Well, no, cos I couldn't make my mind up
是买4C还是买它 between that and the 4C.
这就像是猩猩回到笼子里 It was like watching an ape return to its cage
发现里面有一个苹果和一个香蕉 and finding there was an apple and a banana.
我喜欢苹果 但是也喜欢香蕉 "Oh, I like apple, but I like bananas.
所以我是要苹果呢还是香蕉呢 So do I want the apple or a banana?"
其实可以都要的 You would have had both, obviously.
哈蒙德 这车非常棒 Hammond, that car is brilliant,
而且售价只要6万磅 and it only costs £60,000.
是 但是杰里米 你说这些都没用 Yeah, but honestly, Jeremy, that doesn't mean anything.
就算阿尔法罗密欧发布一摊狗屎 If Alfa Romeo launched a dog turd,
你也会说很棒的 you'd say it was brilliant.
它真的很棒 我不骗你 It is! I'm not making it up!
你都听到和看到了 它确实是辆好车 You heard it. You saw it. It's a fantastic car.
不管了 下面我们要看看 Anyway, listen, we must find out
这个四什么玩意的在埃博拉赛道上能跑多快 how fast the Quadri-thingy goes round the Eboladrome.
这就意味着要把车交给一个人 That, of course, means handing it over
他认为网球这项运动 to a man who thinks that tennis is something
是斯大林发明的 that was invented by Stalin.
这星期他算是本土作战 He's actually a local boy this week,
他家就是隔壁州的 from the next state along.
有请老美 It's the American!
快看 There he is.
即使是他也会喜欢 And even he will enjoy
这台迷人的车子 this magnificent machine,
我敢肯定 I'm sure of that.
他出发了 And he's off with a glorious bark
随着那动人的V6的一声雄壮的嘶吼 and a pop from that sensational V6.
今天赛道好湿啊 Oh, it's wet!
好的 阿尔法罗密欧朱丽叶四蹦子 OK. Alfa Romeo Julie Quad Bike
之类的什么鬼 something or another.
我不会说 根本不会念 I can't say it, can't pronounce it.
也不大喜欢开 I don't really like driving it.
我的天呐 Oh, for God's sake!
听说高个子觉得这是辆好车 So, the tall one thinks this is a good car.
我觉得他小时候脑袋被磕过 I still think he was dropped on his head as a child.
是 可我至少我不会戴着牛仔帽去婚礼 Yeah, but at least I don't wear a cowboy hat to weddings.
好的 动力澎湃的进入留你名弯 Right, now, powering majestically into Your Name Here.
这可能是最精彩的一圈了 This could be the single greatest lap we'll ever see.
你瞎说什么呢 What are you on about?
车身非常平衡 It's beautifully balanced,
大脚油门 hard on the power.
车身有点不稳 有些转向过度 A bit of a wobble there! Some oversteer,
这车的设计意图就是这样 but it was designed to do that.
才不是呢 No, it wasn't!
别说话 哈蒙德 Stop saying things, Hammond.
我忙着呢 I'm busy.
这就是一辆 This is just a BMW
喜欢喝花哨咖啡的人开的宝马 for people who like fancy coffee.
不 这是给有品位和有眼光的人开的宝马 No, it's a BMW for people with taste and discernment.
不 这是给傻子开的宝马 No, it's a BMW for idiots.
哈蒙德 安静 Hammond, be quiet!
你看它在经过 Look at the way it's dealing
老奶房的时候的样子 with Old Lady's House.
一点问题都没有 Almost no problems at all.
现在他可以彻底放开 Now he can really turn it up
冲刺一段冲向变电站 for the sprint to Substation.
这动力 这血统 Such power! Such pedigree!
-这渣渣 -安静 - Such bollocks. - Just be quiet!
只剩两个弯了 Just two corners left.
在雨中还保持如此平稳 Glorious poise in the rain through there.
经过绵羊坡 Field Of Sheep.
多么大师级的悬挂调校 Another master class in suspension control.
最后冲线 And across the line!
行了 说吧 不了 - Well, come on, then. - Well, no...
说啊 怎么样 Come on. What did it do?
啥 时间啊 - What? - Time.
不 跑道是湿的 No, it was wet,
所以没必要放到成绩榜上 so there's no point putting it on the board.
让电脑白白耗电 It'll just wear the computer out
-没有意义 -快说 - for no reason. - Get on with it!
-我们没那么多时间 -赶紧说 - We haven't got time! - Get on with it!
你不说我说 让我们来看一下时间 I'm gonna do it. Let's look at the time.
杰里米的阿尔法四叶草的圈速是 Time for Jeremy's Alfa Quadriplogio.
这可不怎么快啊 哥们 抱歉 That's not quick, mate! I'm sorry.
这根本就不行 That's rubbish!
如果赛道是干的 它能跑到1分15秒 In the dry, it would have done a 1:15.
-不可能 -肯定会 - No, it wouldn't. - Yes, it would.
-不会的 -会的 - No, it wouldn't. - It would!
没必要再争了 There's no point arguing anyway.
他过完阿尔法罗密欧的瘾了 He's got the Alfa Romeo thing out of his system,
这是好事 因为接下来到了 which is good, because it's time now
让我们享受在阳光灿烂的唠嗑街人行道上 for us to enjoy a gentle stroll
悠闲漫步 along the sunlit sidewalks of Conversation Street.
-这片头不错-我挺喜欢的 - That's a good one. - I like that one.
确实不错 好了好了 It is. Right, now...
好的 我们先从这个说起 OK. And we start with this.
阿尔法罗密欧的Stelvio It's the new Alfa Romeo Stelvio.
Stelvio 意大利一条凶险的高速路，以此命名
-你饶了我吧-这可是非常重要的新闻 - For God's sake! - This is important news.
压根就不是重要新闻 这是给白痴看的朋友圈新闻 It's not important news. It's niche news for morons.
拉倒吧 这车很棒的 It's not! It's a superb car,
因为你能得到 because you can have it
和Quadriplegio一样的 with the same 500 horsepower engine
500马力引擎 that you get in the Quadriplegio.
除了这个 还有四轮驱动 And with that... with that you get four-wheel-drive.
那就是说这车能在雨天开 是不是 So that one will work in the wet, will it?
哈蒙德 当某人有了孩子 Hammond, when somebody has a baby,
你会上前看一眼然后说 OK, do you go up to it and...
哦 看我新出生的孩子哟 "Oh, look at my new baby that I've...
恶 长得真丑 Eurgh! It's really ugly!"
好吧 只有在确实丑的情况 Well, only if it's ugly.
你看看 不能对阿尔法罗密欧太残忍 You see, you can't be cruel about Alfa Romeos.
-我当然能 -他们也很努力嘛 - Yes, I can. - They're trying so hard!
好吧 那我们继续 忘了阿尔法吧 Well, let's just move it on. Forget the Alfa, then.
现在我们来聊聊我们所处的位置 Now, we should talk about where we are,
田纳西州 因为这是本州销量最好的车型了 OK, Tennessee, because this is the bestselling vehicle in the state.
是的 - OK.
嗯 我还有一张警车的照片 Yeah, we've got a picture of the police car.
还有救护车 And an ambulance.
-然后是灵车 - And a hearse. - Yeah.
我在推测 推测这里的主题 I'm detecting... detecting a theme here.
皮卡 我觉得我说的对 The pickup truck, I think I'm right,
在这里确实挺受欢迎的 对吧 is very popular in this neck of the woods, yes?
皮卡在英国完全不流行 I'm sure you may be amazed to hear
你门听到会很惊讶吧 they really haven't caught on at all in the UK.
我是说 几乎没人买 I mean, almost nobody has one.
基本上看不到 挺遗憾的 You hardly see them, which is a shame,
因为我很喜欢皮卡 because I love a pickup truck.
-嗯 我们知道 -我喜欢 Yeah, we know. - I like a truck.
你知道吗 - You know?
我可以在这里说 I can say that here. I can say that here.
这很好 你能说出来 但是这并不是很明智 That's fine, you can say that, but they're not actually very sensible.
听着朋友 这又不是全部 Look, mate, that's not everything.
你开着法拉利出门 Anyway, you drive around in your Ferrari, OK,
并且乐于忍受强加的赋税 and happily put up with the compromises that that imposes.
于是你得忍受大量开销 不便 So you put up with the cost, the inconvenience,
而且这也不舒服因为它是辆快车 and it's not very comfortable because it's a fast car.
在皮卡上一样的道理 你要忍受的是 Same with a pickup. You put up with compromises:
重量 尺寸 还有油耗 the weight, the size, the fuel consumption...
那么优点呢 But what's the upside?
这可是辆皮卡啊 你能用它 It's a pickup truck! You can use it...
你能用它装木头 You can put logs in it
或者 从森林把树拖出来 and tow... tow trees out of the woods with it.
往里面放头熊 You could put a bear in it.
哈蒙德 你在传媒公司工作啊 Hammond, you work... you work in the media!
唯一需要放在车后的也就只有 The only thing you have to put in the back of a vehicle
各种联欢餐会的请柬了吧 are invitations to gala lunches.
-好吧 -仅限于此了吧 - Well... - That's all you ever do.
问题是 实际上在英国 The problem, actually, in Britain
开一辆皮卡车 不得不承认的 with a pickup truck-- I'm sorry to admit this--
就是当你在等红灯的时候 is that if you pulled up at a set of traffic lights
车后放着你的水泥搅拌器 and you had your cement mixer
和电锯 and your chainsaw in the back,
马上 这些东西就会被偷走 they would be stolen immediately.
在英国任何放在公共场合的的东西 Anything left in the open in Britain,
就好比聚会上的零食一样 大家随便拿 it's like nuts at a party, you just help yourself.
-为什么这里不会发生呢 - So why doesn't that happen here?
现场谁有皮卡？ Who's got a pickup truck here?
-我的天 不可思议 - Holy cow! That's unbelievable.
当你们出去购物 把东西放在货斗里 When you go shopping and put things in the back,
怎么没有人顺手牵羊呢 why doesn't someone just help themselves?
因为这里他们可以开枪 Because they shoot them here.
好吧 就是这样 Well, there is that.
确实如此 谢了 特朗普 There is that. Thank you, Donald!
不过为啥 你们有没有在 But why... Have you ever had anything stolen
等红灯的时候被偷过 when you were at a red light?
从来没有 有没有人被偷过 Never? Has anyone ever had anything...?
-没有 -真的没有 - AUDIENCE: No. - No?
我以为这里会是 I thought this was supposed to be
在美国犯罪猖狂的地方 crime-ridden in America.
也许人家都很老实 Maybe people are honest.
我不知道 很有可能 I don't know, it's possible.
要是我在英国 If I was in Britain
看见皮卡后面放了个割草机 and saw a pickup truck with a lawnmower,
"这是我的了" "I'll have that."
言归正传 昨天我们去了趟 Now, yesterday we went to erm...
像是个大的经典车博物馆 It was like a big classic-car museum,
就在镇子外面 那里还能把展车买下来 just out of town here, where you could also buy the exhibits.
-很有意思 -很棒的一次经历 - It's great fun. - It was a fantastic day out.
我们在那里很开心 Really enjoyed ourselves in there.
我是说 那都是些 你懂的 I mean, it was full of, you know,
野马和科迈罗之类的 Mustangs and Camaros and stuff.
像这样的东西 我这里有张照片 Stuff like this. We've got a picture
60到70年代的东西 of this sort of thing-- '60s and '70s stuff.
我们都知道长这样的车 开起来很糟糕 Now, we know that cars like this are horrible to drive.
吓人 Terrible.
不过它们看起来特别酷炫 But they're tremendous to look at.
那时的车辆设计的都很有意思 There was so much joy in car design back then,
你看看那辆车 and you see it in that car there.
这其实有点令人伤感 It actually made us slightly sad in a way, though,
因为我们离开以后 我们突然开始思考 because as we were leaving, we suddenly started wondering,
这个博物馆里会放什么 "Well, what are they gonna put in that museum
在接下来的40年里 in 40 years' time?"
-嗯-什么 - Yeah. - What?
日产JUKE,道奇DART,样式奇特 常遭吐槽
日产特么的JUKE The Nissan-bloody-Juke.
-没错 - Exactly.
我可不想现在看到它 I don't want to look at that now.
-没错 或者来个道奇dart - No, exactly. Or the Dodge Dart.
小孩以后会说 爸爸 Well, what child's gonna say, "Oh, Daddy!
咱们去博物馆看40年车龄的Dart好吗 Daddy, let's go and look at the 40-year-old Dart in the museum"?
没人会去的 Nobody is!
确实现在的汽车设计 It's true that car design
变得越来越枯燥了 has become so dreary lately.
并且我认为部分原因是 And I think part of it,
大部分汽车设计者们 it's almost as if the people who design cars
并没有那么喜欢车 don't actually like cars that much.
正是 但那时候的人确实爱车 你能看出来 Exactly. But they did then. You can tell.
当时Cuba旁边停着辆普利茅斯Fury There was a Cuda in there next to a Plymouth Fury,
我站在那里看了一个小时 沉浸其中不可自拔 and I just stood for about an hour, just soaking them in.
我看到辆1966年凯迪拉克 I saw a 1966 Cadillac.
这里有张图 看看 We've got a picture of it here. Look.
这辆车我所喜欢的是 Now, what I like about this
设计机盖的这哥们 is that the bloke who designed the bonnet,
他想 我设计好了机盖 he thought, "I've finished with the bonnet.
再设计前脸 I'll do the grill."
但是他并没有告诉设计尾翼的那帮人 But he didn't tell the blokes doing the wings,
然后他们就接着搞 结果车长向后延伸了一尺多 and they kept going, so it goes like another foot.
不过这车看着很棒 No, but this is fantastic with a fantastic-looking car.
别克Riviera 博物馆里有一辆 The Buick Riviera, they had one of those in there.
-看看这车 -真是赞 - Look at that! - That is glorious!
我有一辆这样的 I had one of those
是我小时候的玩具车 as a toy when I was little.
如果你把手指头从后窗伸过去 If you put your finger over the back window,
它还会闪灯 it flashed its lights.
然后你就这样看着 不禁会想 And you just look and you go,
别克是怎么在30到40年里从设计那样的车型 "How can Buick have gone from doing that
沦落到现在这种 "in, what, 30-40 years, to doing this,
不管这可是棕色 看看吧 whatever this brown..." Look at...
-他们怎么做到的 - How have they done that?!
雪佛兰也是 And it's the same as Chevrolet.
那里有辆1960年的Impala There was an Impala in there, 1960.
看看这个 这叫兴奋而不是感动 Look at that! That is exciting not moving!
那是60年代的雪佛兰Impala That's a Chevy Impala from the '60s.
我们看看现在的样子 Let's have a look at one from today.
-可饶了我吧 - Oh, for God's sake!
他们怎么好意思管那玩意叫Impala How do they even have the nerve to call that an Impala?
这根本就不是啊 Because it isn't one.
我当时看到一辆科尔维特 I was looking at a Corvette,
70年代的科尔维特 a '70s Corvette.
C3款的 That's the C3 model,
如果你是个科尔维特脑残粉的话 if you're a Corvette nerd.
这是一辆所有宇航员 This was a car that was driven
都开的车 by all of the astronauts.
-确实-还有炮王迪哥 - Exactly. - And Dirk Diggler.
Dirk Diggler 英国成人电影演员 "大炮王迪哥“
-嗯 - Yep.
所以说 这车是给 Ah, so it's a car
毛片演员和宇航员开的咯 for porn stars and astronauts.
-这标语厉害了 -当今还有什么车 - What a strapline! - What car is there today
是给宇航员和毛片演员开的 that could be driven by porn stars and astronauts?
-没有了 -阿尔法 - There isn't one. MAN: An Alfa!
其实 他说得对 Actually, he's right!
不对不对 宇航员要能够顺利抵达 No, astronauts have to get there.
他说得对 说的正是 He's right! That's exactly
Quadriplegio -别啊 - what the Quadriplegio is! - No!
专为宇航员和毛片演员量身定制的 也就是我 For porn stars and astronauts, which is what I am.
现在 我想来聊聊 Now, I would like to have
纽博格林 a conversation about the Nürburgring.
-说吧-因为这很重要 - Go on. - Because this is important.
去年 我很高兴的是 Last year, I was delighted.
在德国管理纽博格林的人 The people who run the Nürburgring in Germany,
说他们要禁止厂家在那里 they said they were gonna ban car manufacturers
给车测圈速了 from setting lap records there.
不好意思 你为啥感到高兴 Sorry, why were you delighted about that?
因为这想法很棒 Because that's an excellent idea.
如果你制造的车好到 If you make a car that is excellent
能在纽博格林测圈速 for doing a fast lap of the Nürburgring,
那么日常生活中这车会很没用 it would be useless as a car everywhere else in your life.
就好比把你的房子装修成 It's like... It's like setting your house up
专门用来玩室内真人CS to play Laser Quest.
玩游戏还不错 It will be brilliant for playing Laser Quest,
不过搞个聚餐就很垃圾 but it'll be rubbish for a dinner party
因为屋子里全是激光 because it's full of lasers,
漆黑一片 迷雾重重 而且音乐也是 darkness, fog and music that goes...
而且人们跑来跑去 ...and people running around
想象自己在星球大战当中 thinking that they're in Star Wars.
换个比方 你养条狗 Or you could get a dog...
你可以把狗训练成军犬来看门 You could train a dog as an attack dog,
如果你有个废品场 which is fantastic if you own a scrapyard
这会是不错的选择 and you need the dog to guard it,
不过要是在家当宠物 它会吃了你的孩子 but take it home as a pet, it will eat your children.
完全没用 - It's completely useless.
这就是把车拿到 That's what happens
纽博格林的后果 when you set a car up for the Nürburgring.
这可不是讨论啊 詹姆斯 This isn't really a conversation, James.
我觉得这周不小心拐到了怨妇街 No, I think we've accidentally turned down Rant Lane this week.
-嗯 还没说完呢 - Well, there's more.
-他又开始了 -不 He's off again. - No, no.
关键在于 真正的坏消息是 But the thing is, the bad news in all this
他们已经决定 is that they've decided
将允许汽车制造商 that they will allow car manufacturers
再次去冲击圈速纪录 to set lap records again.
其实这也挺好 Well, that's good.
- 不 这很操蛋 - 好吧 - No, it's bad! - OK.
看看那些最近推出的车 Think of the cars that have come out recently
被不断调试研发 we've been developed
就为了能在纽北圈速更快 so that they would go fast around the Nürburgring.
BMW的M4 GTS BMW M4 GTS,
不可否认 它是一台很糟糕的车 you can't deny it, it's a terrible car.
日产GT-R 赛道版 Nissan GT-R, the Track Edition,
也是一台糟糕的车 that is a terrible car.
就连西雅特的Leon Cupra 280, Even SEAT-- the SEAT Leon Cupra 280,
曾是纽北最快的掀背车 that's got a hatchback record for going around the Nürburgring,
简直就是垃圾 and it's rubbish!
纽博格林就是在毁车 The Nürburgring ruins cars.
我在开发一个手机应用 I'm developing an app for the smart phone
叫做“炸掉纽博格林” called Bomb The Nürburgring
遥控一架道尼17号轰炸机到纽北 where you guide a Dornier 17 over it
然后炸个满天飞 and blow it up.
你来这节目干嘛的 What are you doing on this programme?
来讲道理的 - Talking sense!
问得好 我也不知道 Good question. I don't know.
英国有个主持烘焙节目的老奶奶 We have this old woman who has a baking show in Britain.
叫做玛丽·贝莉 She's called Mary Berry.
你们可能知道她 It would be... You probably know her.
就像听她说 It's probably the same
“我讨厌蛋糕”一样 as her saying, "I hate cakes!"
没错 Yes.
玛丽·贝莉也会同意我的观点 Mary Berry would agree with me,
如果她做了一个蛋糕 because if she made a cake
然后在纽北赛道调试 that had been developed on the Nürburgring,
就会有人在蛋糕顶上放一个洋葱圈 someone would put fried onions on the top
Victoria Sponge Cake 玛丽·贝莉代表食谱
也就毁了蛋糕 你就有了一个 and completely ruin it. You'd have a Victoria sponge
放了洋葱圈的维多利亚海绵蛋糕 with onion on the top for no reason!
詹姆斯 你知道你是个奇葩吧 James, you know you're weird, don't you?
这不叫奇葩 这是这个节目上 That's not weird. That's the most sensible thing
最理智的说法 that's ever been said on this show.
-你就是奇葩 -奇葩个毛线 - You are weird. - I'm not weird.
他真的奇葩 就前几天 He is weird! We were coming through the airport
我们穿过芝加哥机场 here the other day, coming through Chicago,
他突然说 “杰里米 闻闻我的夹克” and he went, "Jeremy, smell my jacket."
他说了啥 - He said what?!
-没错 -我是这么说的 - Yeah. - I did.
他说“闻闻我夹克” 我说“为啥” He said, "Smell my jacket." I said, "Why?"
他说“因为它闻起来像旧唱片机” He said, "Because it smells of old record players."
-伙计 这是真奇葩 -但真的像 - Mate, that is weird. - But it did!
你知道旧唱片机是没有味道的吧 You know record players don't smell of anything?
有的 旧的那种有 They do. Old ones do.
闻起来就像旧唱片机 They smell of old record players.
谁知道旧唱片机什么味儿 Who knows what they smell like?
-我想我们要... -腐烂的... - I'd like us-- - The decaying...
我觉着我们要继续了 I'd like us to move it on
因为已经有点诡异了 because it's getting scary now.
和旧唱片机没关系 That's not the record player!
你到底想干嘛 What are you on about?
有人有旧唱片机吗 Does anybody have an old record player,
或者任何老旧的电器 or anything old electrical?
它们有种味道 不是吗 They smell, don't they?
有人闻过旧唱片机吗 Has anybody ever smelled an old record player?
真的吗 你闻过 Really? You think you have?
你真去闻了旧的... You've smelled an old...
哎哟我天 god, strewth!
你的旧唱片机带蜡筒嘛 Did it have a wax cylinder on it, your old record player?
它们闻起来像旧塑料和热橡胶 They smell like old plastic and warm rubber.
对 就是这个 Yeah, exactly.
是不是闻起来像船长的羞羞抽屉 That smells like his special drawer ,is that.
你像是和爱迪生说话啦 You're actually talking to Thomas Edison there.
指观众老先生年事已高
面对面的 In person.
好样的 Well done, sir.
好的 我们被告知 Now, as we're told
如今几乎每天 almost every day these days, really,
自然界的珊瑚礁正在不断死亡 the world's coral reefs are all dying.
并且人们说是汽车的错 And we're told that this is the fault of the car.
那么 既然我们弄了个汽车节目 Well, since we host a car show,
我们想这也是我们的责任和义务 we thought it would be our duty and responsibility
来做些什么 to do something about it.
在加勒比海 一切看起来都很好 Here in the Caribbean, all appears to be well.
但是在潺潺蓝洋之下 But under the shimmering blue sea,
只是无尽的沙石 there's just miles and miles of sand.
简直是水下沙漠 It's an underwater desert.
并且就算你找到一块礁石 And even when you do find a reef,
大多数珊瑚已经死亡或者濒危 most of the coral is dead or dying.
三十八年前 Thirty-eight years ago,
当地政府下放了一艘船 the local government sank a ship
来促进珊瑚生态的恢复 to encourage the coral to come back.
这奏效了 And it's working.
这已经是一片生命的绿洲 It's already an oasis of life.
这给了我们一个启发 And that gave us an idea.
为什么要用船来作为珊瑚礁的生存枢纽 Why use a ship as the hub or your coral reef?
为啥不用汽车呢 毕竟有数不尽的车 Why not use cars? There are millions of them.
这就是我们所做的 我们弄来五辆车 So that's exactly what we've done. We've got five cars.
并没有走各种 And rather than go through all the expense
昂贵又复杂的回收过程 and complication of recycling them,
而是直接拆解 把引擎拿掉 we've stripped them, taken the engines out,
去掉车漆 就可以放入海底了 removed the paint, and they're ready to go in the sea.
这真的很机智 This really does make perfect sense,
因为当车子进了水里 because when the car is in the water,
就会开始溶解腐蚀 it will start to corrode,
然后吸引各种 and that attracts all the things
适合珊瑚礁生长的物质 that help the coral grow.
接着汽车自己锈着锈着 And then the car itself just rusts away
就锈没了 to absolutely nothing.
比如这一台 它本来 So this one, which started life
是一台极其糟糕的标致 as a pretty horrible Peugeot
也永远会是一辆糟糕的车 and was always a terrible car,
但最后却成了一座漂亮的珊瑚礁 will eventually become a beautiful coral reef.
并且这个过程还挺快 And all this happens quite quickly.
就几年的工夫 So in just a few years' time,
BBC光在车轮拱罩这里 the BBC will be able to make a wildlife documentary
就能拍一部野生纪录片了 just in this wheel arch.
好了 我们准备好了车 Anyway, we've got the cars.
我弄了一台吊车 I've got a crane.
就只差一艘船了 All we need now is a boat,
这是杰里米的任务 which is a job we gave to Jeremy.
是他的责任 That's his responsibility.
他肯定要玩脱的 He'll have overdone it, won't he?
他不一直说要做大么 Well, he'll have made a statement of some sort, so...
货运舰 扎扎实实的货船 Freight ship. Full-on freight ship.
或者油轮 Or a tanker.
他并没有过度 Oh. He hasn't overdone it.
那是他么 Is that him?
这东西意义何在 What is the point of that?
你能把它绑上岸吗 Will you come and tie it up?
这是我见过最差劲的船 糟糕透顶 That's the worst boat I've ever seen. That's awful!
-它有什么问题吗 -那个.... - What's the matter with it? - Well, it...
我们给了你5000美元去买艘船 We gave you $5,000 to buy a boat.
船好贵的 Boats are expensive!
但你绝对没在这破烂上花五千块 You didn't spend all five grand on this.
-这不是一艘五千... -没错 That is not a five thou-- - Yes!
我牙痛 不要这么凶 I've got toothache. Be kind.
毫不相关 这就不是一艘五千块的船 Irrelevant. That is not a $5,000 boat.
-它真的是- 这都不能叫船 你自己看 - It is! - It's barely a boat. Look at it!
这很棒的 你能放一辆车在这里 It's brilliant! You'll get a car on this.
-哪里 -放在后舱 - Er... Where? - On the back!
-你从哪儿买来的 -某汉子 - Who did you buy it from? - A man.
-卖的时候他在偷笑吧 - 并没有 - Was he laughing? - No, he wasn't.
-我能登船吗 -不能 - Can I come aboard? - No.
它应该装不下两个 I don't think it can take two.
看吧 这也太差了 Look! It's terrible!
与其站在那儿 Instead of just standing there,
对一个牙疼的人一顿乱批 criticising a man who's got toothache,
你为何不吊一辆车来 why don't you go and get a car on the crane
开始装货 and start loading it?
很快 我们的第一辆车准备装船了 Soon, our first car was ready to be lifted onto the boat.
回馈自然感觉真好 It's just nice to be putting something back, really.
真的 这是一台小欧宝Corsa It genuinely is. It's a little old Corsa,
即将被珊瑚覆盖 and it's gonna be full of coral.
珊瑚先生驾到 游过来 Mr Coral coming, swimming along.
噢 这里有一个能落脚的玩东西 "Ooh, there's something to latch on to."
接着他的伙伴也过来 Then his friend comes along.
这点子实在太棒了 This is a genuinely brilliant idea.
但那边并没有让我... That doesn't fill me with...
信心爆棚 total confidence.
往下一点 往下 Down a bit! Down!
你必须... You'll have to...
往外一点 Boom out!
这是“往外”的姿势吗 Is that the sign for "boom out"?
就是啊 That. Yeah, that.
像是在被原始人指挥一样 It's like being guided by The Village People.
挺顺利的 除非... It's working now. Unless--
往上提 On! On!
-接下来的危险...-你真是帮上了忙 - The next danger-- - You're really helping.
-我拿着导向绳的 - 行 快去 - I've got the guideline. - Right, go!
-詹姆斯 往下一点 -小心来风 Down a bit, James. - Watch for the wind.
哈蒙德 你能把它换个方向嘛 Hammond, can you swing it around?
你想转一下吗 Do you want me to swing it?
是的 你试试看 Yeah, try and get it...
卧槽 Oh, shit!
谁拉了那根绳子 Who pulled that?
我们必须救车 那可是珊瑚礁啊 救它 We've got to save the car! It's a reef! Save it!
完了 它沉了 没救了 Oh, it's gone! It's gone!
谁拉了... Who pulled the...
那是用来释放的 你个呆木脑壳 That's to release it, you Muppet!
我以为那是个导向绳 Well, I thought it was a guide rope.
不 我来导向 你只要等它到船上然后释放 No, I steer it! You just release it when it's on there!
他让我来导向的 He told me to steer it.
他说 拉那个绳子来控制 He said, "Pull the rope to steer it."
这可是一辆40万英镑的起重机 This is a £400,000 crane!
为啥你要用一根绳子来调方向 Why would you steer it with a piece of string?!
这儿不是有了这些握把和按钮么 It's got all these knobs and buttons.
我来操纵 你来释放 I steer it, you release it!
所以那是快速释放? So that's a quick release?
-没错 -懂了 - Yes! - Got it.
如果我说我们只有四辆车怎么样 What if we just said we only had four cars?
所以我们就准备了四辆车 拿掉了引擎 So we've taken four cars, removed the engines
去掉了车漆 随时准备进入海底 and the paint, and they're ready to go in the sea.
-我们再对着摄像机来一遍 -好的 好的 - We'll do that piece to camera again. - Yeah, yeah.
关键在于 为什么要用船来作为珊瑚礁的生存枢纽 The thing is, why use a ship as the hub of your reef?
为啥不用汽车呢 毕竟有数不尽的车 Why not use cars? There are millions.
所以我们就准备了四辆车 拿掉了引擎 So we've taken four cars, removed the engines,
扒光之后 就做好放入海底的准备了 stripped them down and they're ready to go in the sea.
然后詹姆斯...对 And then James... Oh, yeah.
然后... 然后... And then... And then,
这辆标致不是什么好车 this Peugeot was no good as a car,
但是珊瑚会生长在上面 but will be... but the coral will just stick to it,
和海藻一起慢慢氧化 oxidising and algae.
用不了多久的 Doesn't take very long.
BBC会拍一部纪录片 轮拱什么的 One day, BBC documentary, wheel arch.
是啊 只用了四辆车 就这些 Yeah, from just four cars. That's all we had.
只需要四辆车就能形成珊瑚礁 Four cars. That's all you need for a reef.
好了 这是我们选的船 Right, here's the boat we've selected.
稍微有点破损 It's a little bit damaged.
把释放绳放在一边之后 With the release rope stowed,
我们把四辆车中的第一辆弄上了船 we managed to get the first of our four cars
船的顶部本来就是破损的 onto the boat, which had come with a broken roof.
噢 很好 Yeah. Oh, yes!
-就是这样 -超棒 - Yes! - Yeah!
很好 搞定了 Good! Result.
然后我们得把它固定住 And then we had to secure it in place.
我搞不懂这些棘轮带 I don't understand ratchet straps.
那个 船里进水了 Er... There's water coming into the boat.
-不 我买的时候里面就有水 -船漏了 - No, there was some in when I bought it. - It's leaking.
舱底总归有点水的 There's always a bit of water in the bilges.
所以船上才会配舱底泵 It's why boats have bilge pumps.
不 水涌进来了 No, it's coming in.
不是流进来 而是涌进来了 It's not just like it's in, it's coming in.
-但我这没有 -这有洞 船在漏水 - Well, there's none here. - There's holes! It's leaking!
糟糕 的确有洞 快把我们拴在吊车上 Oh, shit! No, there is! Well, attach us to the crane.
呃 船在下沉 Er... It's gone down.
它在 它要沉了 It has gone... It is going down.
如果把我们栓在吊车上 If you attach us to the crane,
它就不会沉了 对吧 it won't sink, will it?
我们绑好了 We're tied on.
詹姆斯 你能拉一下吗 James, can you just take the slack?
可惜 詹姆斯误解了 Sadly, James misunderstood
这个简单的指令 this simple instruction.
噢 船尾这边要塌了 Oh, the whole thing
整艘船都要翻了 has collapsed at the back!
噢 我的天 Oh, dear God!
等一下 停 怎么回事 Wait! Stop! Whoa! Whoa! What?
船要翻了 It's falling over!
詹姆斯 船要翻了 James, it's falling!
-你们想怎么样 -我的天呐 - What do you want? - Holy Mother of God!
船要沉了 弃船自保 It's going down! Abandon ship! Save yourself!
拉住啊 詹姆斯 Catch it, James!
救船 Save it!
别 Stop!
你搞什么呢 What are you doing?
噢 我的天 Oh, God.
法国特勤局 The French Secret Service
干的活都没这么好 didn't do a job as good as this.
我不想跟你们说话 I'm not talking to any of you.
别啊 拜托 这是船长的错 No. Come on, it was May's fault.
是你买的这艘破船 You bought a crap boat,
也是你让那只长毛狗开吊车 you put an idiot spaniel on the crane,
具体指毛发较长的猎犬 讽刺詹姆斯的发型
还有 想想我们 and, also, think what we were gonna do
本该赋予这辆车的使命 for the conception of the car.
人们会喜爱它 People would love the car. They would see it
把它看作珊瑚的完美栖息地 as a friendly, coral-loving thing.
你游起来像个老太太 You're swimming like an old woman.
我他妈不想待在这水里 I don't like being in the bloody water!
真的 我很不爽 我是伯明翰人 Fact! I'm not comfortable! I'm from Birmingham!
在邮轮经常停靠的位置 Having sunk a boat and two cars
沉了一艘船和两辆车之后 where the cruise liners normally park,
港口管理者建议我们滚蛋 the port authorities suggested we go away.
所以我们带着剩下的三辆车 So we took our three remaining cars
去了附近的一个码头 to a nearby marina,
自己造了一个筏子 built ourselves a raft,
然后租了一艘 and hired a boat
船头有吊车的船 which had a crane on the front.
-船长 -什么事 - May! - What?
你别开吊车了 You're not operating the crane.
你来开 You are operating the crane.
行 Yeah.
我就想说明一点 I'd just like to point out
这份工作我做得很好 that I've been fired from a job
但是我被开除了 that I was doing perfectly.
我故意的 Meant that.
这吊车不动啊 是不是哪里有个开关 I can't get the crane working. Is there a switch?
别问我 我不会开吊车 Don't come to me for help. I'm rubbish at cranes.
我也没问你啊 谁说我要问你了 I didn't, did I? Did I?
很快 我们就准备装第一辆车了 Soon, we were ready to load our first car.
你差着十万八千里呢 You're miles away!
你得放到正上方 You've got to be spot-on.
我只能举到这儿 I can only lift it to there.
这边 往这边点 This way, this way, this way, this way.
不 往上 No, up, up, up.
我没法 杰里米 你要往后退 I can't... Jeremy, you'll have to go back.
你的船一直在动 我也没办法啊 I can't do it if you keep moving the boat!
如果要后退 应该是往那边 If I want to go backwards, I should go that way.
对 这边 你要到 我这里动不了 Right, this way. You've got to... I can't move it...
我够不到 他在开船 I can't go that way! He's driving!
我动不了啊 I can't move it!
我们为什么不 噢天哪 Why don't we pick it... Oh, God.
我们往哪儿走呢 Where are we going?!
该怪的是 风一直在乱吹 The bad things... It's the wind!
我们怎么在这儿 Why are we over here?
有风 Wind!
来了 就这样 Here he comes! This is it! This is it!
不偏不倚 We're coming in hot!
停 别用这钩子追我 Stop... chasing me with the bloody crane!
船长 你这辈子就不能有一件事干得麻利点吗 May, will you do something quickly in your life?
我真想杀了他 I'm going to kill him!
有了 好的 快拉走 Here we go! Yes! Run away! Run away!
我们成功了 We have hooked the apple!
-一点点来 -我们真棒 -In a bit, in a bit. -We are good.
我们太棒了 这简直是奇迹 We are so good, it's almost incredible.
现在我们轻车熟路了 Now we had our eye in...
噢 我的天 Oh, Jesus.
装第二辆车易如反掌 ...loading the second car was the work of a moment.
-勾上了 -天哪 真棒 -We're on. -Oh, my God! Yes.
行了 可以了 That's it. That'll do.
这是我做过的最有男子气概的事了 This is the manliest thing I've ever done.
我要把我大蛋蛋放在我吊车上 I'm just gonna rest my big balls on my crane.
筏子装满了 With our raft full,
我们出发前往 we headed out to the spot
经海洋生物专家鉴定 identified by marine biologists
拥有最适宜珊瑚礁形成的 as having the perfect depth, current and temperature
完美水深 洋流和温度之地 for a reef to form.
放下暗礁 Release the reef!
-好的 -搞定 -Yes! -There it goes!
-暗礁诞生了 -那是我们的暗礁 - The reef is born! -That's our reef!
-沉下去吧 -来吧 珊瑚 - Sink! - Come, coral! Come!
-下去吧 -好棒 -Go! -Yes!
我非常满意 Oh, I'm pleased with that!
这辆标致206 The Peugeot 206.
太棒了 That is brilliant.
接下来 我要把车锚到位 Next, we had to anchor the cars in place,
这是我们三个之中 唯一有资格的潜水员的任务 which was a job for the only qualified diver among us.
而且他还自带了装备 He'd even brought his own equipment.
好的 往后一点 Right. Back a bit.
往后 碰到我鼻子了 Back... That's on my nose.
别叫唤了 Stop moaning!
如果他是心脏外科医生 If he were a heart surgeon,
他会带着一个旧皮包出现 he would turn up with an old leather bag
包里有一把锯一把锤子 with a saw and hammer in it, wouldn't he?
我来了 准备进行手术 "I'm ready to do your operation. Here I am."
就像一张旧桌子 上面还有个老式胶木电话 It's like his old table with his Bakelite telephone on it.
-是的 -你好 翰墨史密斯37号 - Yes. - "Hello. Hammersmith 37 here."
詹姆斯的潜水服太旧了 James's suit was so old,
没有配备氧气瓶 所以麻烦的是 it didn't come with air tanks, so, annoyingly,
我们要负责让他活着 it was our responsibility to keep him alive.
我们要干多久 How long have we got to do this for?
一直到他干完活吧 Well, for as long as he's done there.
-说真的 累死我了 -我有点晕 - Honestly, I'm exhausted. - I'm getting dizzy.
我们应该继续 We should keep going.
不 你看 那里有个发电机 No. Look, there's a generator.
我们为何不把它连上发电机呢 Why don't we just connect it to the generator?
快点 Now. Now.
-知道了 -你个白痴 - Yeah. - You're an idiot.
救命的空气来了 Life-saving air.
这样就行了 Oh, there we go.
搞定 我们去找点乐子吧 On. And relax.
加油啊 机器 come on machine
就差一点点 Nearly!
回话 船长 Come in, James.
当我们的同事最终浮出水面 When our colleague finally surfaced...
他非常生气 he was very angry.
我根本就不在车附近 差得远了 That was nowhere near the cars. Nowhere near.
什么不在车的附近 What was nowhere near the cars?
你不如把我放在洛杉矶的海岸上 You might as well have dropped me off the coast of Los Angeles!
-我根本看不见 -别说了 - I couldn't even see them! - Just stop. Stop.
你什么意思 What do you... What do you mean?
你怎么会 你总是不停地说 How did you manage... You're the boat expert,
你是船舶专家 as you're forever telling us.
你是怎么做到在这儿放下车 How did you manage to put the cars there
然后把船开出去90米的 and then move the boat about 100 yards away?
-它自己漂走的 -漂走了一点 - We drifted. - We drifted a bit.
-你的任务完成了吗 -没有 - Have you done the job? - No.
-什么 -车没有被锚住 - What? - The cars are not anchored.
因为我刚一到车那儿 Because when I got there,
你这四处乱漂的愚蠢的橙色罐头皮小船 your drifting, stupid, orange biscuit-tin boat
就把我拉走了 yanked me back off it!
我们没有一整个下午的时间 We don't have an afternoon
让你一边划桨一边浪费 to just throw away while you go paddling.
你是说 我得去完成任务 不是吗 You're saying... I'm gonna have to do it, aren't I?
很快 詹姆斯邦德准备下水了 Soon, James Bond was ready to go in the water.
-我看上去像罗杰摩尔吗 -像 - Do I look like Roger Moore? - Yeah, you do.
-特别像 -像那个卖菜的罗杰摩尔 - You do, yeah. Yeah. - Roger Moore, the greengrocer.
罗杰·摩尔：第三代007扮演者
-下去吧 -耶 - Let go. Yes! - Yay!
我刚给了杰里米一把焊枪 I've just handed Jeremy a welding iron.
噢 我的天 Oh, dear God.
我不是很相信杰里米的焊接水平 I'm not sure I trust Jeremy to do welding.
我连他会去网上看 I wouldn't trust Jeremy
焊接教程都不信 to watch a YouTube guide to welding.
-噢 -怎么了 -Oh! -What's that?
-出事了 -杰里米 -That's gone wrong. -Jeremy?
出了相当可怕的事 Badly, horribly wrong.
-怎么样了 -非常好 - How did that go? - Very well.
-是吗 -当然 - Did it? - Oh, yeah.
我们回到岸上 吃了顿庆功宴 We headed back to shore for an agreeable dinner,
很庆幸我们重要的环保工作 happy that our important environmental work
最终还是顺利完成 was, at last, going well.
但是珊瑚开始长了吗 But are the coral starting now?
-是的 -所以它们就在水下 - Yeah. - So they're down there now.
-一小块珊瑚会... -是的 会长成的 - A bit of coral's gonna... - Yeah, it will have done.
不是很大的珊瑚礁 It's not a big coral reef,
但这是珊瑚礁的开始 but it's the start of a coral reef.
好样的 伙计们 我们做到了 Well done, chaps. We have done...
你们知道我不碰杯的 I don't clink glasses, as you know,
但让我们为今天的成就举杯 but we can raise a glass to our success today.
是的 我们干得好 Yes. Well done, us.
可能这就是大众在做的 Maybe that's what Volkswagen were doing--
造一片珊瑚礁 building a reef.
很有可能 That could be it. That could be it.
稍后继续我们重要的海洋生物工作 We're gonna pick up our important marine biology work later on.
现在是明星脑碰脑环节 But now it's time to play Celebrity Brain Crash!
这没法更好了 That doesn't get any better.
这片头 真的没法做更好了 That really doesn't get any better, that sting.
但无论如何 今晚的嘉宾来自 But anyway, my guest tonight is from...
这要怎么形容呢 Well, how can I describe it, really?
世界上第二大 ...the second biggest
也是最重要的 and most important part of the world,
音乐重镇 英格兰东北 as far as music is concerned: the Northeast of England.
噢 拜托 Oh, come on!
怎么了 Well, hello?!
马克·诺弗勒 保罗·罗杰斯 Mark Knopfler, Paul Rodgers,
戈登·斯汀 小混混乐队的几个妹子 Gordon Sting, a couple of people out of Little Mix.
-林迪斯芳 很棒 -嗯 林迪斯芳 我们先跳过 - Lindisfarne. Mm, lovely. - Yes, Lindisfarne. We'll gloss over that.
但我们也有核心人物 But then we've also got... the main man.
我们把他带来了 他是世界上最大的摇滚乐队 The man we have lined up for you, he is the lead singer
AC/DC的主唱 of the biggest rock band in the world, AC/DC.
女士们先生们 布莱恩·约翰逊 Ladies and gentlemen, Brian Johnson!
他在那儿 - There he is! - There he is!
他在那儿 他来了 There he is! Here he comes!
我们要跟他聊什么呢 What are we gonna talk to him about?
-他开始尝试赛车运动了 -是啊 - Well, he's taken up motor racing. - Yeah.
-他有个新的电视节目 -对 在路上 - He's got a new TV show. - Yes, on the road.
他在路上 He's on the road.
我要跟他聊聊 他在世界最顶端 I'm gonna talk to him about being at the front
摇滚乐队担任主唱的感受 of the world's biggest rock band.
等等他在哪儿 - Where is he? - Hang on, where is he
-他来了 -他在那儿 - Here he comes! - Oh, there he is!
-就在那儿 -是他本人 一个传奇 - There he is. - The man himself. What a legend!
我一直想见见他 我太激动了 I can't... I've always wanted to meet him. I'm thrilled.
-是啊 -那是一个传奇 - Yeah. - That is a legend. Proper...
-等一下 -哦不 - Oh, hello. - Oh, no.
-什么 -我的天 - What? - Oh, my...
我的天呐 Oh, God!
-我们害死了他 -我们害死了布莱恩·约翰逊 -We killed him. - We've killed Brian Johnson.
那真是... That's...
好吧 OK.
布莱恩·约翰逊被一群 Brian Johnson has been run over
以为自己在踢足球的人碾过去了 by some people who think they are playing football.
但这不是足球 不是吗 But they're not. It's not football, is it?
那不是足球 That's not football.
橄榄球梗
只是一群穿奇装异服的人 That's just people dressing up.
-那是... -我们才踢足球 - That's... - We play football.
-我们踢足球 -嗯 用脚 - We play football. - Yeah, with our feet.
那才是足球 That is football.
-那叫皮球 -啥 - Soccer! It's soccer! - What?!
这不是皮球 我们踢的是足球 It's not soccer! It's football that we play!
世界上67.5亿人都叫它足球 It's 6.75 billion people in the world call it football!
随你们怎么抱怨 You can moan and shout all you like.
事实是 我们是英国人 我们做的节目 The fact is, we're British and we edit this show,
你们都会被剪掉的 and you'll just get cut out.
这是个橄榄球 This is a rugby ball!
看大屏幕 Look on the screen.
他们只是在用 They're only playing
他们的胸肌玩的这个 with the padding they were born with!
这不是足球 This is not a football!
这些人叫他足球 They call it football.
美利坚 美利坚 USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!
所以... So...
刚刚踩踏布莱恩·约翰逊的是 Brian Johnson has been run over by erm...
一些极其勇敢和天才的足球球员 ...some supremely brave and talented footballers.
这是不是说他来不了了 Does that mean he's not coming on, then?
詹姆斯 他被压扁到 Well, James, he's been hammered
可以塞进信封的厚度 to the thickness of an envelope
他的脊柱变成拼图了 所以他来不了 and his spine is now a jigsaw, so that is a no.
好吧 Fine.
好的 那我们怎么填补这时间呢 Right, so what are we gonna do to fill the time?
我没想法 I've got nothing.
我们可以返回到 We could get back
我们重要的海洋生态工作中 to our important marine biology work.
-好计划 执行 -好的 就这么做 - Plan. Do it. - Yes, let's do that.
所以当我们离开时 So when we left the action,
我成功的 I'd successfully
焊接了两辆车到海底 welded two cars to the seabed,
这很好 and that was good.
是的 我们在第二天采取了行动 Yeah, and we pick up the action the next day,
我们回去完成这项工作 as we go back to finish the job.
当我们打算进行最后一辆车的时候 On our way to get the last car,
我们在礁石处停了一会 we stopped at the reef site
来确保一切都进行顺利 to make sure everything was OK.
汤姆·戴利 Tom Daley!
英国跳水运动员
我不喜欢这个 I don't like it.
哦哦 Oh. Oh.
在水里待了几分钟之后 And after a few moments in the water,
我们发现并不顺利 we discovered it wasn't.
那些玩意在哪里 浮标在这里 Where the bloody hell are they? There's the buoy.
不是这个地方 This is the wrong place.
是的 那个标记了地点 Yes, that marks the spot.
它们就是不在这里 They're just not here.
为什么我们会相信你能把它们安置好 Why did we trust you to fix them in place?
-我没有 听着 -所有人 - I didn't... Listen. - Of all people.
好吧 我不能理解 Well, I don't understand it,
我一般不会搞得一团糟 cos I don't normally make a mess of...
哦这个工作你肯定干的很好 Oh, you must have made a good job of it.
这就是为什么它们都没了 That's why they've gone!
这就是证据 或者很多证据 There is evidence, or a lack of it,
来证明你不会焊接 to suggest you can't weld.
-卧槽 -可能是条鲨鱼 - Oh, shit. - Maybe a shark...
-恩 -什么 - Er... - What?
-怎么了 -看 - What? - Look.
哦太好了 Oh, brilliant!
它们是怎么做到的 How the hell did they do that, though?
你感觉到推着我们走的洋流没 You know this current that's whizzing us about?
看它们 一点没有要变礁石的样子 对吧 Look at them! They're not gonna make a reef, are they?!
或者 也许它们可以 Well, maybe it could be
变成一个贵宾们的玩乐之所 like a play area for the privileged.
一堆生锈的车 Some rusty cars?
那个不起作用对吗 That doesn't work, does it?
当然不 OTHERS: No.
显然 我们要回收它们 Obviously, we had to retrieve them,
这就意味着把木筏 which meant moving the raft
移到起重船的船尾 to the stern of our crane boat.
詹姆斯 你把那头松开了吗 James, have you untied that end?
好的 准备好接住绳子 来了 Yeah. Get ready to catch this rope. Here we go.
把它拉过来点 整整齐 Pull it along a bit and get it sort of squared up.
我能坐舒服点 I'll have a nice ride.
好的 木筏重新定位中 Right. Repositioning raft.
这是个靠谱的声音 That's a reassuring noise.
恩 这个是哪里来的 Er... Where... Where's that come from?
船长 船长 James. James.
-干嘛 -这里是怎么了 - What? - What's that doing over there?
什么怎么了 What's what doing?
所有的竹子都散架了 All this bamboo's come off.
你解开了什么 What have you untied?
我解开了在前面的一根绳子 I've untied the piece of string at the front.
但是 看 半个竹筏都不见了 But, look, half the craft is disappearing.
因为竹筏瓦解的太快了 As the raft was disintegrating fast,
我们不得不快点回到岸上 we had to get it to shore quickly.
开动这台机器 Firing up the machine!
悲伤的是 大猩猩在控制速度 Sadly, though, Jeremy's turn of speed
只会让一切变得更糟 only made things worse.
马力 马力 来啊 Power! Power! Come on!
慢点 Slow down!
它在解体 It's falling apart!
-看它要沉了 -慢一点 Look, he's going down! Slow down!
慢 Slow!
你不能放车在上面了 对吧 You can't put cars on that, can you?
在我们营救了詹姆斯之后 After we'd rescued James,
他愚蠢地建议 这个问题的解决方案 he stupidly suggested that, to solve the problem,
得要毁了所有人的假日时光 we should ruin everyone's holiday.
我觉得这些人应该从这里走开 I think these people should move out of the way.
我的计划是把车拖离沙滩 My plan was to tow the cars off the beach
拖回码头 我们就能重新开始了 and back to the harbour so we could start again.
这就意味着我需要亚特兰蒂斯人的帮助 Which meant I'd need the help of the man from Atlantis.
抓住我的手 来了来了 现在放手 Hold my hand! There! There! There! Now, let me go.
是的就是我 你要松开 Yeah, that's me. You have to let...
哦小心我的胳膊 快放开我 我可以的 Oh, mind my arm! Let me go now. I'm fine.
我不喜欢这个 I don't like it!
走开 Move!
哈蒙德 把这两个绑起来然后给我个赞 Hammond, tie both of them to this and give me a thumbs up.
如果詹姆斯把这些一路 If James gets those onto the road,
带到码头的地方 all the way back up to the harbour,
再造一个竹筏 载上车 build another raft, get them loaded on...
把它们带回去 这要花上好几天 ...bring them back, it's gonna take days.
-好了 -不要站在附近 - OK. - Don't stand near the back.
这个刹车不管用 The brakes don't work.
好的 Yeah!
-又怎么了 -这简直是垃圾 - Well, now what? - That was rubbish.
然后我说 我们该用我那棒呆的船 I then said we should use my brilliant boat
把这两辆车拖到礁石那 to tow the cars back to the reef site,
这又快又简单 which would be quicker and easier.
它们在水里了 They're in the water!
哈哈 马力 Ha-ha! Power!
马力 来啊 Power! Come on!
耶 Yes!
吃我的船吧 船长 Eat my boat, James May!
来啊 Come on!
胜利属于船 Victory is the boat's!
詹姆斯那没用的计划 James May's hopeless plan...
那是啥 What was that?
游泳区里扔了两辆绣标致 With two rusty Peugeots in his swimming area
沙滩靠椅成了一片废墟 and his beach furniture in ruins,
宾馆的经理已经受够了 the hotel manager had had enough
给我们下了逐客令 and ordered us to leave.
我们现在损失了四辆车 一艘船和我们的木筏 We'd now lost four cars, a boat and our raft.
但积极地来看 我们还剩一辆车 But on the plus side, we still had one car left,
和最重要的起重船 and most importantly, the crane boat.
但是那天晚上 坏消息来了 But that night, there was bad news.
起重船的船主对我们不是很满意 The man who owns it is not best pleased with us.
-因为啥 -他把船停租了 - Because? - He has off-hired it.
-那么我们就没有起重船了 -没有了 - We've not got the crane boat? - No.
-这是我们手里最有用的东西了 -是啊 - That was the most useful thing we had. - Yeah.
所以我们能用那辆路虎做些什么 So what can we possibly do with a Land Rover?
-嗯 -嗯 什么 Well... Well, what?
如果积极点想 If I can be positive...
路虎的车身大部分都是铝 The Land Rover's largely aluminium,
实际上这用来做珊瑚礁更合适 which is actually even better for creating a reef.
-真的 -但是车在陆地上 - True. - But it's on the land!
这是个问题 那辆路虎 Yes, it is true. The Land Rover is--
没用啊 我们别的都没了 It's irrelevant. We've lost everything else.
是 但是如果... Yes, but it's good if...
我有办法了 I've had a brainwave.
噢 天 Oh, God.
所以 第二天早上 And so, the next morning,
巴巴多斯岛上的人们目睹了 the people of Barbados were treated
一场旷世奇观 to the magnificent spectacle
一辆路虎靠着内胎 of a Land Rover gliding majestically
威武滑行 on a bed of inner tubes
穿越加勒比海 across the Caribbean Sea.
现在我们在最后一辆车上 这款车很经典 Here we are on our final car, and it's a classic.
这是一款路虎 Series I It's a Series I Land Rover.
不 这是台Series II No, it's a Series II.
这是台Series I 大灯是靠在一起的 It's a Series I. The lights are close together.
不 车门上有辊压 No, it's got the barrel rolls on the doors.
这是台Series II It's a Series II.
-所以还真是Series II -是啊 - That makes it a Series II? - Yeah.
我记得Series II的大灯是带角度的 I thought Series IIs had the lights angled.
我觉得我们进死循环了 I think we're getting stuck on this.
-这是台路虎 -是一台老路虎 - It's a Land Rover. - It's an old Land Rover.
这车的好处就在于 The good thing about it is
它被腐蚀的速度远远低于钢制的车 it corrodes much less quickly than the steel car.
我们还给它贴上了石灰石瓦片 We've also glued these limestone tiles to it,
因为多孔的石灰石是让珊瑚成礁 because porous limestone is the perfect base, foundation,
最好的基础 for coral to start a reef.
这就是一台珊瑚礁制造机啊 This is a coral-reef-making machine.
只不过美中不足的 In fact, the only fly in the ointment
是它的推进系统 was its propulsion system.
-我能走得再快点吗 -不能了 - Can I go a bit faster? - OTHERS: No!
你再走快点就进水了 It's filling with water the faster you go.
我们就在错误的地方把它弄沉了 We'll sink it in the wrong place.
这是我们最后一辆车 我们最后的机会 This is our last car, our last chance.
他们在哭诉 "哦 别走得太快" They're bleating on. "Oh, don't go too fast!"
你又跑得太快了 杰里米 You're going faster again, Jeremy!
你在把它往水里拽 You're pulling it under!
放轻松 Relax!
我和他到底是不是一个物种 Am I the same species as that?
不 No.
杰里米 别把它 Jeremy, don't sink it
在我们到之前就弄沉了 before we get there!
我天 你看见那个了没 Mother of God! Have you seen that?
-啥 -看那边 - What? - Guys, look!
-哦天 -我去 看那边 Oh, my God! Holy cow! Look at it!
这可太壮观了 That is phenomenal!
耶 比试下吧 Yeah! Racing!
杰里米 你会弄沉我们的 别跟它比 Jeremy, you're going to sink us! Don't race it!
追上... 噢 我可没时间和那俩耗着 Catch the... Oh, I haven't got time for these two.
好 让我们追上那艘帆船 Right. Let's go catch that sailing boat!
噢 太棒了 Oh, brilliant!
瞧瞧这个 小太阳 Watch this, sunshine.
它是我见过最快的... That is the fastest thing I've...
为什么它比我还快 Why is it faster than me?
他们好厉害 微风要战胜马力了 They're so good, breeze is beating brake horsepower.
我跟不上它 I cannot keep up with it.
我们什么时候喝自己的尿 When do we drink our own urine?
看看那玩意 Look at that thing now!
我天 Bloody Nora!
这简直 太棒了 That is just... fabulous!
我本可在这宏伟之作里瞎闹一整天 I could have buzzed around this amazing machine all day,
但是我还有重要的环保工作要做 but there was still important environmental work to do.
所以 我很不情愿地离开了 So, reluctantly, I broke off
重新回到受困的同事身边 to rejoin my stranded colleagues.
-你们还好吗 -并不 - Are you all right? - Well, no!
我们刚刚被丢在一辆路虎里随波逐流 We've just been left to drift in a Land Rover!
托你的福 这些瓷砖都没掉 Fortunately for you, none of these ceramic tiles is loose,
要不我就拿它怼你头了 otherwise I'd chuck it at your head.
你知不知道 实际上它操控起来 Do you know, I think it actually handles better
比陆地上要好 than it does on land.
不久 我们就要到达礁石区域 Soon, we will reach the reef site,
扎穿内胎 这台路虎就会沉下去 puncture the inner tubes, the Land Rover will sink,
成为一个鳕鱼 黑线鳕 鲤鱼的 and it will become a safe haven for cod
安全庇护所 and haddock and...bream.
最终 我们到达了指定位置 Eventually, we reached the site
着手把我们的制礁机凿沉 and said about scuttling our reef machine.
开火 Fire!
-好样的 -好样的 Yes! Yes!
走起 Here we go!
下去 沉没吧 Down! Sink!
喔 Whoo!
说实话 所有出色的环保项目 In truth, all great environmental projects
都是历经过重重困难的 are beset with problems.
而我们这次 除了詹姆斯以外 都没有出错 And ours, through no fault of our own, except James's,
也是如此 was no exception.
别弄翻了 停下 Save it! Stop!
所以 最后我们的新礁石 So, in the end, our new reef
没有像我们想的那样出色 wasn't quite as spectacular as we'd hoped.
但这只是个开始 But it was a start,
有朝一日它会成为一些 and one day it'll be the core of something
绵延千里的东西的中心 a thousand miles long--
在加勒比海中一个崭新又华丽的 a new and beautiful home
为鳕鱼和黑线鳕而建的新家 for the cod and the haddock of the Caribbean.
欢迎 鱼儿们
样板间 现已开放
我刚 尿了
非常感谢 Thank you so much.
由衷地感谢巴巴多斯岛政府 And a very big thank you to the government of Barbados
对我们拍摄的鼎力相助 for helping us with that film.
而且我想说在我们建礁石时 And we'd just like to say no coral was damaged
没有任何珊瑚受损 while we were building our reef.
没有 老实说 也没造出来啥珊瑚礁 No. Or, if we're perfectly honest, created.
但是 我们带着一个绝佳的想法回来了 However, we came back with a brilliant idea.
你们看见了 我们很喜欢加勒比 You see, we liked it in the Caribbean.
我们的工作组也很喜欢加勒比 Our crews liked it in the Caribbean.
所以我想这应该是个好主意 下周 So we thought it would be a good idea, next week,
做一个片子 to make a film
比较法国 德国 英国之间 comparing the motoring cultures of the French,
汽车文化的差异 the Dutch and the British Islands.
-嗯 是个好主意 -好想法 - Yeah, it was a great idea. - Brilliant idea.
但是威尔曼先生 我们的制片人 But Mr Wilman, our producer,
他觉得这不是个好主意 he decided it wasn't a brilliant idea,
所以 取而代之的是 and that, instead,
我们应该开着三辆旧车去法国北部 we should go to northern France with three old cars
在雨天里开车兜圈子 - and drive around in the rain.
这确实是我们正在做的 So that's what we're actually doing.
随着这个让人失望的消息 是结束的时候了 And on that terrible disappointment, it's time to end.
感谢您的收看 Thank you so much for watching.
感谢您的到来 回见 保重 Thank you for coming. See you soon. Take care.
下次再见 - See you next time.