A: Oh my god! B: I don't know! I don't know!
Julian: Ah, the single life. Gotta love it, right? I just really love it a lot. Just so
much, freedom. Anyway, 44% of Americans over 18 lead single lives. That's a pretty big
chunk and we wanted to see how people felt about singledom. We brought in a selection
of single people and we asked them a few questions. If you could wake up tomorrow and be single
and in a relationship would you be single or in a relationship?
A: In a relationship. C: I'd be in a relationship.
D: In a relationship. B: I'd like to have someone special.
E: In a relationship. F: In a relationship, right away. When you're
with someone like I don't know just being with them, holding them, it's nice!
G: In a relationship no doubt! Humans aren't meant to be alone.
Julian: This really surprised us. Not one person actually wanted to be single over being in a
relationship. So just to be sure we even surveyed forty-five additional participants outside
the show and all forty-five said they'd prefer to be in a relationship.
What are the qualities you look for in a partner? E: Companionship.
F: Honest, doesn't cheat. The basics. D: Friendly but aggressive.
B: Someone who I can just grab pancakes at 2 AM at IHOP just because we both feel like it.
Julian: What do you think it is that other
people are looking for in a partner. C: One night stands.
E: Money, sex. G: Certain financial status. A lot of people
out here looking for arm candy. B: Someone who they can showcase.
D: That's why I just want to get married so I don't have to worry about it anymore,
just be done with it! It's like I'm married, I have kids, I can't date you!
Julian: We also learned that we're all looking for the same great qualities but we think
we're one of the only ones who is! Now unless we were lucky enough that every participant
we had was the saint of their social circle, something just doesn't add up!
What would you say if I told you that all the people we asked said the same thing. I
am looking for all these great qualities in a person and all of them also said that they
believe everybody else is looking for something more superficial arm candy or money.
B: I guess that we put ourselves up on a pedestal and think we're so noble!
C: I hope that not everybody feels that the world is out to get them.
Julian: Are all those qualities packed into any single person you know now?
E: Dating-wise, no. A: Mhm!
B: Yeah! F: Yeah.
D: Yeah. B: I can be myself around him and be comfortable.
A: Like I'm really trying with someone right now.
E: She's kind, she's sometimes too kind to people. But she doesn't judge people.
D: The guy that I actually just met and he's, you know, everything. But I'm actually scared to go
forth with the whole process because I don't feel he feels the same way.
Julian: Would you be willing to give him a call and let him know that he has these qualities?
D: Um. Julian: I promise nothing bad will happen.
A: [laughs] B: I don't know, wait that's weird!
Julian: Well we're not asking you to ask him out or anything like that. Just let him know
he has these qualities! D: It's kind of weird because her younger
brother used to be my best friend. That's like breaking bro code or something.
Julian: It's not, it's fine. A: Okay!
B: So I'll just tell him that he has good qualities.
Julian: Yes! C: I don't know if you saw that girl in the
lobby but she seems like a genuinely nice person, which is good! I like that! I like
nice people. Julian: Did you get here number?
So she's here! C: Yeah! She's in the lobby.
E: I'm nervous man. [phone]: Hello?
F: Hey Brenda! [phone]: Hey!
A: Hi Sam, it's Mel! I hope that you are doing well.
D: I'm shaking. C: I just wanted to tell you that I think
you're really nice. B: Thanks!
C: And you have a good energy and that's awesome!
B: Thank you! I feel that you have a good energy too!
A: I think that you're so like intelligent and caring and affectionate.
C: Now that we're here, I'd like to run by you some opportunities. We can play checkers
on Friday, chess on Saturday, or water polo on Sunday. I mean it's totally up to you!
B: Oh hey Michael, this is Sandy. Yeah you know just happy Saturday. I just want to tell
you that you are a fantastic person and you're really funny and I miss that because you're
not in LA anymore. And I... D: When we first met, I did not expect to
feel the way I've felt. I thought we were just going to be friends. I actually see something
in you that I haven't seen in anybody else. F: They told me to describe someone that
had the same qualities that I would go out for like nice and everything and,
ya, so I called you! [phone]: You're calling me?
F: Yeah! B: I still remember that time that we had
cheesecakes super super late and you, yeah and you just told me to go for my dreams and
that meant a lot to me! Oh gosh, okay!
Thank you!
I believe in you.
You're... You're an awesome person.
You have to start believing more in yourself, you know?
You're amazing buddy, you are.
F: I'm alright.
No, you're cool.
D: You know I know you have some type of attraction towards me but I feel a little
bit more than just attracted to your body and all that stuff. I love how you're so honest
and you're so sweet and genuine.
Yeah.
B: This is the longest voicemail you'll ever receive.
you rock because you cook and you like little kids and you like fro-yo and those
are the three main tenets in life dude. D: It's not me trying to be sentimental,
I mean how do you feel after you know, everything.
I mean... I'm always cool.
Whatever happens happens.
I like that answer.
A: And I just am really appreciating the time we've been spending together, okay bye!
D: Bye.
Julian: How are you feeling now?
B: I feel good!
D: That was great!
B: That was very freeing! Julian: How do you feel about taking a risk
like that? B: Being in the mind set of taking risks
is always good. So I am all for them! But I usually don't do them in public.
C: I don't mind being bold! I think risk is necessary for growth.
D: Oh actually, I love taking risk. I love a challenge. That was a really big challenge
for me. F: Took a risk by being here man. My friend
she's like just sign up! You never know where you end up, may end up on a show, or just
meeting someone you really like! D: Now that I did that, I feel ten times better!
B: The thing is I don't need to date him
now or anything but at least he knows that I feel this way about him!
D: Either he likes me or he doesn't. If he likes me then if he doesn't work out then
I'm going to do that to the next guy! A: I'm glad I did it now because I did it!
F: Whatever you think is too much risk just take a little more.
Julian: So go out and take a chance on somebody. We're a lot more alike than we think. Like
happiness, everyone wants love but a lot of the ideas we have about how to get it, give
it, sustain it, are outdated, conflicting, and kind of vague. So we figured how about
we have a practical conversation about it and make it a little less confusing.
I'm Julian, and this has been the Science of Love!